Think of it as the secret knock to the private time expansion members club.

The private club where the door opens and the noise from outside just falls away.

Where time passes with the carefree ease of a mid August day when you’re nine and have sweets in your pocket.

The lazy generous luxury of time wealth.

The cheerful easy shrug of ‘both, either’ reply to life choices

Because urgency?

Got checked in at the door with your phone and coat by the time butler.

And instead you get to try on the tailored just to you jacket that is the deep self-trust of knowing you can slip into spaciousness with your next breath.

Here AND back out in the real world.

I’m sharing the secret knock because I would have happily done something quite unethical on the eve of my 35th birthday five years ago when life and time felt like a relentless dark tidal wave coming towards me.

And now? I have to dig really deep to remember how it felt.

Once you learn the knock? You don’t go back.

So play, enjoy, explore, let me know what you discover!

Emma 🐆

🛠 Tools & exercises from this episode

1. The body check-in Twice a day — or whenever you remember — just pause and ask: what do I feel? Then more space: what do I hear? You don’t need to fix or interpret what comes up. Just create the connection. Start small. Start now. I was so disconnected from my body in my 20s that I was blacking out from exhaustion and thought I had a brain tumour. The optician told me my eyes were simply exhausted. That’s how far the disconnection can go — and how completely it can be reversed.

2. Seek the boredom The connection points happen at the edge of boredom. Not in the middle of a podcast, not while scrolling. In the walk home from the supermarket. While you clean your teeth. In the car. Look for the boredom — that’s the edge where something else becomes available. I think of it as Peter Pan just on the horizon, just where the sunrise meets the water.

3. Name your energy In stillness and space, something unique about you starts to become audible. One of my clients discovered Miami Energy — the freedom and peace and power she feels at the beach, wearing clothes with the breeze moving through her, not wanting to be anywhere else. Another has Ocean Energy — diving in the evening, doing exactly what she wants, not caring who sees. Mine is sensual alegría — stillness in movement, sheer unselfconscious joy. What’s yours? You don’t have to know yet. Create the space and let it come.

4. The time expansion breath Time is perception. Five minutes when you’re bored can feel like nothing. Five minutes when you’re scared can feel like decades. Just breathe. Feel the exhale. You have time. You have all the time in the world to do what matters to you — whether you’re 18 or 99.

You can find ✨ The Life Atelier, my 1:1 coaching programme, here [URL]. You can find me on Instagram here [URL]. You can find Joy Studio, my community for women in business, here [URL].

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — welcome back, and the smashed glass that woke Rita up

00:30 — recording just before my birthday and why May always feels magical

01:00 — five years ago at 34: being followed around by a sand timer

02:00 — what that relationship with time actually felt like — the Hawaii analogy

03:30 — the dry side of the island: heat, oppression, and no release from the storm

05:00 — time expansion: what it means and what it makes possible

05:30 — feeling like it was already too late at 18 (grade seven piano, anyone?)

06:30 — David Attenborough turned 100 yesterday — it is not too late

07:00 — time is perception: breathe with me for a moment

08:00 — the birthday gift: experimenting with silence, space, and boredom

09:00 — the parts of you that have been pushed down and don’t feel safe to be heard

10:00 — creating space to hear what’s astonishing in you

10:30 — Miami Energy, Ocean Energy, and sensual alegría

12:00 — Rosie, the first dog, and que alegría in the dog park in Spain

13:30 — being so disconnected from my body I thought I had a brain tumour

14:30 — the body check-in practice and what started to become audible

15:30 — the boredom edge: Peter Pan on the horizon where the sunrise meets the water

16:30 — tying it all together: fall to fly, feel the pain to access the joy, seek the silence

17:30 — what is your energy? what’s there for you in that space?

18:00 — happy birthday to me — and the May offer, the life design session, and what happens either way

Resources

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, prices increase in June

✦ Start later in the year and still keep current pricing — just message me

Reflection prompts from this episode

Where in your life does time feel like something you’re running out of rather than something you’re living inside — and what is that costing you?

When did you last seek the boredom? What happened in that space when you let it be there?

And what is your energy — the thing that is uniquely, specifically, unmistakably you? What name would you give it?

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every Friday.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

And I was thinking about how prioritising these activities that bring them joy came from little shifts, little self-trust deposits in their self-trust investment funds, the pause before automatically rushing, the ‘let me get back to you, I have a 36 hour breathing space before deciding on new opportunities’ delivered first wobbily and then confidently with practise.

These shifts are the muscle that mean these women are already on the path to the goals we’ve set together based on their authenticity, wants, and an honest evaluation of what they’re capable and where they are.

There will be others who think the goals are too ambitious, and others who think they are too timid, they should skip the horseriding and yoga sessions, ‘knuckle down’ suffer until the result.

Noise.

Distraction.

Complication.

Simplicity is beauty and simplicity plus self-trust applied to your goals? A joyful, liberating, powerful discipline.

I mention Kilian Jornet in this episode because he is my favourite expression of that right now, endurance fuelled by play and desire for happiness.

He says again and again that it’s what you do each day that adds up.

And the version of you who made space to have a nourishing breakfast in the sunshine before picking up your phone, who chose to go to a horseriding class at lunchtime or hike in nature at the weekend instead of ‘pushing through’ week after week?

They are the version of you who also leans into the fear, who picks courage again and again, they are the ones that make it to the end with a smile on their face, already planning the next peak with delicious tired energy in the car on the drive home instead of grimly punishing themselves for not doing it fast enough and comparing their performance to others on different paths.

I’ve shared the questions I’m sending my clients this week who are starting their Life Atelier practise this June, and I would love for you to give yourself the gift of pausing to answer them yourself.

And if you want to be one of the group I’m leading through The Life Atelier this year, to share your stories and what you create in 3, 5, or 10 months? You can save your spot at the current prices before the 1st June increase, by replying to this email and letting me know you’re in or we can schedule a conversation to talk about if this is the right fit for you and where you are 💛

Click here to learn about Your Life Atelier: The Practice

Before We Begin: Terrain Check-in & Prehab

Your Life Atelier: The Practice

Before we run, we read the terrain. Before we climb, we check the conditions. Before the work begins, we get honest about where we are.

This is not an assessment. You are not being evaluated. You are simply mapping the ground you are standing on — so that everything that follows can be built on something real.

What this is

The terrain check-in is the first thing you bring to your opening session. We use it together to understand where you are right now — your sleep, your body, your current pressures, how your brain and nervous system work — so we can build your practice around the actual you, not an imagined version.

There are no right answers. There is no baseline to meet. The more honest you are, the more useful this becomes.

Take your time. Come back to questions that do not land immediately. Write in whatever way feels natural — short answers, long answers, fragments, feelings. All of it is useful.

Decisions about what to do with what you find here happen in your first session, together. Right now, just explore.

Part 1 — The terrain

Sleep

What is your relationship with sleep right now?

How do you feel when you wake up?

What is most disrupting your sleep at the moment — if anything?

Nourishment

What is your relationship with food right now?

How does eating feel — is it something you enjoy, something you manage, something you forget?

What does your body feel like it needs that it is not currently getting?

Movement and body

How are you moving your body at the moment?

How does that feel — energising, dutiful, absent, joyful?

What is your relationship with your body like right now — honest version?

Nature

How much time are you spending in nature?

What is your version of nature — what is accessible to you right now?

What does being in nature give you when you do find your way there?

Social media and digital noise

What is your relationship with your phone and social media right now?

How do you feel after you have been scrolling?

What would you like that relationship to look like?

Support

Who do you have around you who genuinely supports you — not just practically, but in the deeper sense?

Who in your life might find it difficult — consciously or unconsciously — when you start to change?

What kind of support do you most need right now that you are not currently getting?

Current pressures

What is costing you the most energy right now?

What are you carrying that you have not yet named out loud?

What would it feel like to put some of that down — even temporarily — for the duration of a session?

Part 2 — How your brain and nervous system work

This is not a personality test. It is a practical map of how you are wired — so the tools can be calibrated to you rather than applied generically.

Motivation

What does it feel like when you are genuinely motivated — in your body, in your energy, in how you move through a day?

What has historically helped you follow through on things that matter to you?

What has historically got in the way?

Focus

How do you work best — what conditions, what time of day, what environment?

When do you feel most scattered or unfocused — what tends to be happening?

Your nervous system — stress responses

When we are under pressure, our nervous system moves into one of four responses. Most of us have a dominant one — though all four can show up depending on the situation.

Fight — pushing through, arguing, fixing, taking control Flight — leaving, getting busy, moving on, escaping the feeling Freeze — going quiet, going through the motions, shutting down Fawn — appeasing, over-giving, making it okay for everyone else first

Which of these do you recognise most in yourself?

What does it look like specifically for you — what do you say, what do you do, what do you stop doing?

What are your personal dashboard lights — the specific words, thoughts, or behaviours that tell you your nervous system has been activated before you consciously realise it?

(These are the early signals — the ones that, when you learn to spot them, change everything)

What helps you return to yourself when you have been activated?

Part 3 — Your starting point

In one paragraph — where are you right now?

Not where you want to be. Not where you think you should be. Where you actually are. The version you might not have said out loud yet.

What do you most want to feel differently about?

What would have to be true for you to feel that this work was worth it?

What are you most afraid of — about doing this, or about what it might change?

What are you most excited about?

Part 4 — Prehab

Prehab is what you do before the work begins so the work can actually land.

You do not need to have everything in place before your first session. But reading through what follows — and noticing where there is friction — is useful preparation.

Create some silence

The most transformative practice in this programme is also the one most people resist: creating space to hear themselves.

Before your first session, experiment with one of these — just once:

* Walk without headphones or music

* Sit with your coffee or tea without your phone

* Drive without the radio

* Do something with your hands with no audio in the background

Notice what comes up in the silence. You do not need to do anything with it. Just notice.

Reduce the noise — temporarily

Creativity needs space. When there is constant input — podcasts, news, social media, other people’s opinions — you cannot hear your own.

Consider, just for the first two weeks of the programme:

* Turning off notifications for at least part of the day

* Removing one source of background noise that is not serving you

* Protecting one morning or evening a week that belongs only to you

This is not permanent. It is deliberate clearing — so that into the quiet, you can start to hear what is actually there.

Lower the bar for the beginning

Your brain is designed to protect you from the unfamiliar. Even something deeply wanted will trigger some resistance. That is not a signal to stop. It is a signal that something real is beginning.

The antidote is not to push harder. It is to lower the bar for the first weeks. Show up in small ways. Build the muscle before you add the weight. The practice will deepen naturally — you do not need to force it.

Start the body check-in

Before your first session, try this once a day for three days:

Pause. Put your hand on your heart if that feels right. Notice your shoulders — what are they doing? Your jaw. Your belly. Your breath.

Do not fix anything. Do not interpret anything. Just notice.

This thirty-second practice is the foundation of everything. The earlier you build it, the more it will give you.

A note on the acclimatisation

You may not feel different after session one. You may not feel different after session three. And then something will shift — usually quietly, usually when you are doing something ordinary — and you will realise you are already different.

That is the acclimatisation. The external catching up with what has changed underneath.

Trust the pace. The work is happening even when you cannot see it.

One of my great pleasures right now is taking the AI written intro’s to these voice notes - (I use Claude to pull timestamps from podcasts because it feels helpful) - and cheerfully saying NOPE.

Highlighting the copy.

Deleting it.

Then writing in my own grammatically distressing but gloriously human voice to you.

Like a kid presenting their great artwork, drawn in Chanel red lipstick on your white wall - VOILA!

Here I am, here you are, this is me communicating how much I love you right now and want to share my new experience, my way. ☺️💄🎨

So, the episode and surgically extracted by Claude tools are below, and I hope you will listen to it today, it’s about a life lived from you and that being not just enough, but the goal.

It’s also my first public share that it turns out I am someone who responds to resting her sprained ankle by using the time to organise her body of work into the first draft of a book.

And still can feel at 5pm like the day was a boring waste 😆 - but only for a few minutes, then I reminded myself what I’d done.

That the rested ankle today means that birthday peak just got a lot more likely again, AND that I get to now invite my coaching clients to be part of the book.

I want to share your stories. The process. From never having run in your life to preparing to climb the Matterhorn 12 months later, from feeling like it’s too late to change to writing your own book proposal this time next year, from a life where the idea of breakfast outside in the sunshine feels as laughably impossible as climbing Everest, turns into your daily ritual that everything else flows from.

You know my story.

And I want the people who pick up my book in the future to know yours, because being part of the beginning and seeing the messy middle before the still messy but magical next conclusion?

That’s what gives them the hope to take the first step that changes everything.

What do you think?

Do you want to be part of Your Life Atelier: The Practise?

My clients — those already with me and those starting in June — will be my team. Three months, five months, or ten. On 1st June, my birthday, I share the full toolkit and map. Then our adventure begins. ✨

If you’d like to talk about which option is best for you?

Reply to this email with YES or you can schedule a conversation here, prices go up on 1st June so we have a whole week to explore if this is for you, have a beautiful Sunday,

Emma ✨🌿

🛠 Tools & ideas from this episode

1. The Life Atelier: The Practice — what it actually is Not a course to add to the pile. Not another framework to implement. A workspace for your life — six modules, two seasons, one practice that builds into the architecture of how you actually live. Starting with your Signature Essence and ending with BE — the integration that most programmes skip entirely.

2. The two seasons — which one are you in? Focus season: one peak, one filter question, radical simplicity. Everything measured against: will this take me there — yes or no? Flow season: mind, body, project — 21-day cycles, Monday intention, Friday reflection. Building the longer-term muscles so that when Focus season comes, you are ready. One question to sit with: which season does your body recognise right now?

3. The acclimatisation practice Kilian Jornet at Everest base camp — bored in a tent, mountains to climb, asking: can I acclimatise faster so I can maximise my time having fun? You can apply this to anything you have always wanted but do not yet feel safe having. Start smaller than the dream. Get used to it in your body. Sit on the bench next to the park with your coffee before you have the garden. The external will catch up with what changes underneath.

4. Before learning that you weren’t enough The invitation in this episode — and in the whole programme — is to remember the version of you that existed before the stickers, the ticks, the boxes, the exams. Before you learned to modify. That version is still there. They were always there. They are incredible. This work is the practice of actually living like it.

5. Unconditional dog-levels of love (Rita dropped her ball at the exact right moment for this one.) Every being arrives with something cool, amazing, and beautiful just waiting to be expressed. The socialisation covered it. The conditioning taught you it was not safe. The practice is uncovering it — not performing it, not faking it till you make it, but genuinely falling over and saying: oh, interesting, so that’s what happens when I do that.

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — a spontaneous voice note, Rita’s big sigh, and why I recorded this now

00:30 — the last week of current prices and why spaces are limited

01:00 — before all of the stuff: before you learned you weren’t enough

01:45 — before you learned to get a sticker or a tick to be loved

02:15 — the you who you are is there right now — they were always there

02:45 — Jane Goodall’s favourite animal and unconditional dog-levels of love for yourself

03:30 — Rita drops her ball at exactly the right moment

04:00 — what genuinely believing you are amazing actually looks like (hint: it is falling over and getting curious)

04:45 — Rita: a month of being bitterly thin, the daily practice of trust, and the tipping point

05:30 — a sprained ankle, staying still, and wanting to see the sunrise on a mountain for my birthday

06:15 — what I did with the stillness: the first draft of The Life Atelier book and the journal

06:45 — the thing I most want you to know: your story will be in the book

07:30 — what a Life Atelier practice actually is: a workspace for your life

08:15 — what it feels like to have lost your centre of gravity — and what finding it again looks like

09:00 — the six threads woven through every module: Signature Essence, nature, stillness, play, sensual alegría, BE

09:30 — my Signature Essence: Wild, Sanctuary, Impact, Intimacy — and what each one actually means

11:30 — Kilian Jornet, intimacy, and why I cannot do superficial

12:00 — nature as regulation, rhythm, and the check-in that is always available

12:30 — stillness: the thing I resisted most my whole life, and why it is everything

13:15 — play as the thing that unfreezes us and helps us find what is authentic

13:45 — sensual alegría: a cat stretching in the sun — I’m here, I’m in my body, this is pleasure

14:30 — BE: acclimatising to your new level before the next peak

15:30 — Kilian climbing Everest twice and asking: can I acclimatise faster so I can have more fun?

16:00 — sitting on a bench next to a park with your coffee, getting used to having a garden

16:45 — the two seasons: Focus (race season, one peak, one filter) and Flow (training season, 21-day cycles)

18:00 — how the skills you build in one area flood into every other area of your life

19:00 — the overview: Safety, Wanting, Focus, Motivation, Creation, Decisions, BE

20:00 — the invitation: be one of the small group I take through this on 1st June

20:30 — their stories will be in the book — that is the magic of saying yes this week

Resources

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, prices increase 1st June

✦ Lock in current pricing now and start any time before September 2026

Reflection prompts from this episode

Which season are you in right now — Focus or Flow? And is the way you are living actually matching that?

What did you love doing before you learned to perform doing it?

If your story were going to be in a book — what would you want it to say?

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every Friday.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

today’s voice note is an invitation to notice where you’re sitting uncomfortably in the shade instead of feeling the sunshine on your face and stretching because someone else put the perfectly moveable chair inside a chalk circle and wrote ‘Do not move.’

My loves, you can move.

You can pick that chair up if you do indeed want a chair and put it wherever you want.

Might the bristling British gentleman with the chalk be upset? Sure.

But is that worth sitting in the shade?

I think not.

In fact, seeing you enjoy the sunshine over here might be exactly what he needs to investigate life outside the lines too!

Enjoy, let me know what metric you decide to play with

Emma ✨🐆

🛠 Tools & exercises from this episode

1. The SovReina Compass check-in Four sliders to navigate back to yourself. Notice where you are on each one:

* Are the decisions you’re taking expansive or contractive?

* Is your focus creating the future or recreating the past?

* Are the words you’re using opening up possibility or shutting down options?

* Is your validation coming from inside or outside?

No fixing required — just notice. That’s the compass doing its job.

2. Set your own metric What is the internal measure you actually care about? Mine is: am I enjoying this? Not performing enjoyment — genuinely in it. Name yours. Write it down. Then use it.

3. Run two experiments this month Pick one thing that piques your curiosity and just do it — message, sign up, say yes, before the thought passes. Then pick one thing you’d normally dismiss as not for you — and try it anyway. Both experiments give you data. Both bring you closer to your own metrics.

4. Small injuries, small data — big injuries, big data When you ignore your internal signals and follow someone else’s protocol, you push past the small signs until they become big ones. The small injuries — the moments of friction, the things that feel slightly off — are data. Meet them with curiosity before they become the kind of data that lands you in a collapsing cottage in Normandy with no money and a dog, starting completely over. (Which, for the record, turned out to be the most transformative experience of my life. But still.)

You can find ✨ The Life Atelier, my 1:1 coaching programme, here (20% off in May). You can find me on Instagram here. You can find Joy Studio, my community for women in business, here.

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — this week’s tool: creating your own metrics

00:30 — the SovReina Compass and its four sliders

01:30 — flow state: what it actually is and when you’ve already felt it

02:30 — the light on the wooden floor and why anchors matter

03:00 — painting the fence in Normandy and losing track of time

04:00 — setting up Claude as a French tutor (eco-entrepreneurship, wild swimming, mountains)

05:30 — the moment I cracked the past tense and why grammar bores me to tears

06:00 — am I enjoying this? — why that’s a serious metric

07:00 — the Welsh lake, the sauna, and the cold plunge I did at my own pace

09:00 — going in slowly, a bird of prey overhead, the parts of me under the water feeling warmer

10:30 — am I doing this for me? — the second metric

11:00 — joining Creative Mornings Running in Toulouse (I’m a runner now apparently)

12:30 — running in Australia with a fireman ex and the story I told about my weak ankles

14:00 — showing up to run club fully prepared to be purple and at the back

15:00 — running on tippy toes and being that annoying person chatting at the front

16:00 — “when are you joining a race?” — and why my answer was never

16:30 — a race is someone else’s metric — and why that matters

17:00 — Lina’s answer: internal validation, going slow, and injuries as data

18:00 — small signals ignored become big injuries — burnout, collapse, the corporate grind

19:00 — the cottage in Normandy at 34: big injury, big data, most transformative experience of my life

21:00 — 40 is coming and I have never felt more possibility, more strength, more alive

22:00 — the tool: two experiments to find your own metrics this month

23:00 — the life design session: what it is and why it’s worth doing either way

Resources

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, prices increase in June

✦ Start later in the year and still keep current pricing — just message me

Reflection prompts from this episode

Where in your life are you currently running someone else’s race — measuring yourself against a metric that was never yours to begin with?

What are the small signals — the little friction points, the things that feel slightly off — that you might be pushing past right now?

And if you were to set just one internal metric for this month, something that’s truly yours: what would it be?

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every Friday.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

this might be one of those voice notes where you don’t love me immediately, but you sit with it and a few days later you reach out and say, ok, yes, I get it. I’m in.

A little like the banana bread I was offered on Friday post run club that was either burnt tasting or deliciously caramel chewy.

It took a beat and an espresso to come down on the side of delicious caramel chewy.

But if anyone else said - eew. Burnt? Sure. I can see that too.

If you’re IN the 3 days I’m offering then yes, burnt is the dominant experience.

But if you’re on the other side and in the realisation of a lifetime of transformative love? Oh now we’re nodding at each other with our eyes lit up in surprise and the deep caramel chewy taste!

If you don’t like bananas.

Change the analogy. Don’t lose the lesson 💛

So, before you listen, ask yourself the following question:

The offer. 3 Days of Heartbreak For 18 Months of Transformative Love, Do you take it?

Then? Come back to me after the voice note.

Emma ✨

🛠 Tools & exercises from this episode

1. The lake exercise Picture your mind as a lake you’re crossing in a boat. In the shallows you can see the small uncomfortable thoughts — the gym membership guilt, the unmade call. Deeper, the water darkens: the relationship you’re unsure about, the job you might hate. Deeper still: the things you’ve never let yourself look at directly. Just noticing where you are on the lake is the first step. You don’t have to dive in. Just see what’s there.

2. The emotion-to-joy equation If you only ever allow yourself to feel sadness at a level 3, you’re only ever available for joy at a level 3. The cap is symmetrical. Ask yourself: what emotion am I most avoiding — and what level of joy am I accidentally capping along with it?

3. The tattoo / vaccination reframe Before you avoid an emotion, cost it out. A tattoo is 30-40 minutes of discomfort for something beautiful you carry forever. Heartbreak, when you actually go into it, can be a few days — for 18 months of being fully in love. The vaccination hurts for minutes; the anxiety of not having it lasts the whole trip. What is the actual cost of feeling the thing you’re avoiding?

4. The 30-second emotion practice Put the thought out of your head — because it’s the thought that drags the emotion out, not the emotion itself. Then just feel the sensation in your body. Where is it? What colour is it? Is it moving? Feel it fully, and feel it leave. A mentor told me emotions felt this way pass in 30 seconds. I’ve been testing it. It works.

5. The palate cleanser question When an emotion passes, ask: what am I being asked to create space for? This grief is asking me to create space for the love I want. This anger is asking me to create space for the change I want to see. The emotion isn’t the problem — it’s the signal.

You can find ✨ The Life Atelier, my 1:1 coaching programme, here (20% off in May). You can find me on Instagram here. You can find Joy Studio, my community for women in business, here.

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — welcome back, and what this episode is the next level of

00:30 — what emotions actually are: sensations in the body as a response to thoughts in the mind

01:30 — 66,000 thoughts a day, most of them subconscious — and why that matters

02:00 — the hairs on the back of your neck: how your body knows before your brain does

03:00 — the little flickering thoughts running underneath (taxes, your mum, that friend)

04:00 — the lake: shallows, depths, and the things you’ve never looked at directly

06:00 — why we avoid emotions and why avoidance makes them louder

07:00 — the Enneagram and which emotion your type is most likely avoiding

08:00 — capping sadness caps joy: the symmetry of emotional capacity

09:00 — the tattoo and the vaccination: costing out what you’re actually afraid of

10:00 — all the vaccinations at once, and the 12-hour restaurant shift (yes, really)

11:00 — heartbreak: what it actually cost me versus what I got for it

12:30 — going all in on love because I knew I could care for myself through the grief

13:30 — “three days for 18 months” — the cost-benefit of feeling it fully

14:00 — learning to take a punch: why that advice never worked for me

15:00 — what a punch actually costs you (and what it teaches you for life)

16:00 — the up-level: a mentor told me emotions pass in 30 seconds

16:30 — it’s the thought that drags the emotion out, not the emotion itself

17:00 — the practice: feel it in your body, see it, feel it leave

17:30 — the palate cleanser question: what am I being asked to create space for?

18:00 — how I used the palate cleanser idea for the VAT increase (and made it fun)

19:00 — next week: creating your own metrics — and why “as long as it’s fun” is one of mine

Resources

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, prices increase in June

✦ Start later in the year and still keep current pricing — just message me

Reflection prompts from this episode

What emotion are you most consistently avoiding — and what level of joy might you be capping along with it?

If you were to cost out the thing you’re dreading feeling — the grief, the anger, the sadness — what is it actually? Days? Hours? What’s on the other side of that cost?

And what might you be being asked to create space for?

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every Friday.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

You’ll see what happens 💛

Enjoy the voice note, notes & tools below and let me know how you like the format!

Happy Saturday,

Emma ✨

Joy Ambition — Episode Notes

The more you’re willing to fall flat on your face, the less you do

🛠 Tools & exercises from this episode

1. The “what have I always done” audit Notice the pattern you keep repeating — waiting to feel ready, practising at home before going to the studio, preparing before you show up. Ask yourself: what have I always done, and what result has it created? That’s your data.

2. Change the goal Instead of making the goal not falling over, make it learning how to fall. What happens when you stop trying to avoid the thing and start getting curious about it? That shift changes everything — your body relaxes, you loosen up, and you actually move better.

3. Worst case, best case visualisation Sit with the worst case scenario you’re currently imagining. Really feel into it — what happens, what do you do, how do you meet it? Notice whether the fear passes when you actually walk through it. Then, when you’ve really been with the worst: what might the best be? And let the best be superficial if it wants to. Noble and superficial motivations are both allowed.

4. Pack a chocolate bar When you’ve walked through the worst case, make a practical plan for it. What do you actually need to meet that scenario with courage and a bit of cheer? Pack accordingly. This is sovereignty in action — deciding in advance, not panicking in the moment.

You can find ✨ The Life Atelier, my 1:1 coaching programme, here (20% off in May). You can find me on Instagram here. You can find Joy Studio, my community for women in business, here.

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — the gas incident and why the windows were open

01:00 — the topic I wish someone had told me sooner

02:30 — growing up “not sporty” — and how that story was completely wrong

04:00 — forging fake orthodontist notes to drive to Snowdonia (yes, really)

05:30 — deciding to love my body exactly as it was, and what that unlocked

06:30 — the yoga studio moment: why preparing at home was keeping me stuck

07:30 — the fear of falling — headstands, handstands, and breaking my neck

09:00 — changing the goal: from not falling to learning how to fall

09:30 — the Foix mountain, seven days, and realising I wasn’t scared of heights

10:00 — the tool: visualising your worst case scenario with curiosity

11:00 — becoming an English teacher at 27 and learning to model the fall

12:15 — “slipping into cold water” — what limitless actually feels like

13:00 — this works for business, love, your body — wherever you’re holding back

14:00 — when you make falling the goal, you relax. here’s what happened.

15:00 — the graceful forward roll that taught me everything

15:30 — falling down the mountain (and learning I just... stop)

16:30 — how to actually walk through a worst case scenario

18:00 — the secret I wasn’t proud of: going straight up gives you an amazing ass

19:00 — you get to have superficial motivations AND noble ones

19:30 — the more willing you are to fall, the less you do — and what that means

20:00 — next week: emotions, how to be with them, and what’s on the other side

Resources

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, prices increase in June

✦ Start later in the year and still keep current pricing — just message me

Reflection prompts from this episode

What story have you been telling yourself about who you are — and what does the evidence of your life actually show?

What would change if the goal wasn’t to avoid falling, but to learn how to fall?

And what is the worst case you keep imagining — have you ever actually sat with it, walked through it, felt it to the end? What’s there when you do?

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every Friday.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

And I admit, I’ve been procrastinating a little, I didn’t realise how much emotion I was holding about sharing the story behind it, what it took to go for it then be in it with the pattern of the light through the leaves on my desk like sunlight dancing on the river next to me, and the life design and time expansion tools I used along the way.

So this is a voice note about wanting things fully, asking for what you need, and learning to trust yourself enough to fall, plus tools & exercises you can actually use yourself right now, today.

🛠 Tools & Exercises from This Episode

1. The Self-Identity Audit Think about the thing that keeps appearing in the corners of your mind — the one you journal about, notice when others have it, but quietly believe isn’t for you.

Ask yourself:

* What is it about the way I see myself that makes me think this isn’t for me?

* What is it about the people who do have it that makes it feel completely fine for them?

Apply this to money, love, lifestyle, business, health. Make a few notes. That’s the area to work on.

2. Strategic Daydreaming Before you put any limits on what you’re looking for — don’t.

Do your first search, your first exploration, your first vision with no budget cap, no practical filter, no “but realistically.” Just ask: what do I actually want? Let yourself gather data on how it feels. Build your capacity to want.

3. Strategic Cheekiness Once you know what you want, ask for it anyway — even if it feels like a stretch. Be transparent. Show up as yourself. Be honest at every step and then let the situation, the person, the opportunity decide. Your job is just to ask.

4. Deciding Ahead of Time Set your limits and boundaries with yourself before you’re in the room, before you’re in the negotiation, before you’re in the feeling. Decide in advance what you will and won’t accept. It makes it infinitely easier to hold your space when you’re actually in it.

5. The Self-Treatment Check Ask yourself honestly: how do I treat myself when things don’t go to plan?

This is not a small question. The way you treat yourself after things fall apart directly marks out the distance of your race. You cannot run beyond it — your inner critic will snap the bungee cord and pull you back every time, until you feel safe enough to fall and trust yourself to get back up.

6. Practising Being in Trust When you’re waiting — for the answer, the outcome, the decision — practise the thought: if it’s meant for me, it will be easy. If this is mine, it will flow.

Notice what in your life has felt like struggle and resistance versus what has felt like slipping into cold water — heightened, present, alive, but not forced. That contrast is data.

7. Integration Before Action When you arrive somewhere new — a home, a chapter, a decision, a version of yourself — resist the urge to fill it immediately. Be still. Learn the rhythm. Feel what the next right thing is each day, rather than doing everything at once.

You can find ✨The Life Atelier my 1:1 coaching programme here (20% off in May). You can find me on Instagram here. You can find Joy Studio my community for women in business — here.

In this episode we talk about:

00:00 — why I almost didn’t record this episode

01:00 — starting before you feel ready

02:00 — what life design and time expansion coaching actually means

03:30 — the school holiday feeling and why I want it for everyone

05:15 — introducing The Life Atelier and the three containers

06:45 — the slow vinyasa lesson: why going slow builds more muscle than going fast

08:00 — the internet cutting out — and the three-day decision that changed everything

09:45 — why the 3-month Focused container might be right for you (and when it’s not)

10:55 — pricing, the June increase, and how to lock in current rates

12:00 — always wanting a home with nature — and the conflict between city and wild

13:45 — two houses isn’t a luxury: rewriting your self-identity story

16:00 — strategic daydreaming: searching with no limits first

17:30 — the first viewing, the missed train, and the hobbit-sized bedroom

21:00 — being strategically cheeky: asking for what you want anyway

23:00 — holding your space in the room and deciding your limits ahead of time

24:30 — the hermit crab moment: what it feels like to be fully exposed and vulnerable

26:30 — “if this one exists, there must be another one” — building trust in rejection

27:30 — how you treat yourself after things don’t go to plan is the real limit on your ambition

29:00 — the call from my landlord (and the quiet street where I cried)

30:45 — when things are aligned, they flow — introducing the Joy Code

32:00 — integration: learning the rhythm of a new space before filling it

34:30 — co-regulation and why my nervous system purring changes yours too

35:30 — what your own dreams are asking you to make space for

36:00 — the complimentary Life Design Session: what it is and how to book

Resources:

✦ Book a complimentary Life Design Session → emmalavelle.co

✦ The Life Atelier — 3, 5 & 10 month containers, 20% off until 31 May

✦ Prices increase significantly on 1 June — you can lock in current rates and start later in the year

Reflection prompts from this episode:

What is it that keeps appearing in the corners of your mind — in your journal, in what you notice other people have?

What is it about the way you see yourself that makes you think it isn’t for you?

And how do you treat yourself when things don’t go to plan? That answer tells you exactly how much joy and ambition you can hold right now.

Joy Ambition is your weekly voice note with me, Emma Lavelle — life design and time expansion coach, and founder of The Life Atelier. New episodes every week.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

I want you to rest in that question for a moment. Not rush to answer it. Just imagine it.

In this episode:

* The wolf and the domesticated dog — and what Rita sleeping next to me right now has to do with your potential

* The cheetah who doesn’t know how fast she can run — Glennon Doyle’s Untamed and what it means to have been living in an invisible cage

* The wet feet story — what happened in the Gorge in Aveyron when I finally stopped trying to keep my trainers dry and just walked

* What I saw on the mountain when I stopped focusing on the drop and let myself soften — the branches that were there all along

* Your skin improves. You sleep better. Your relationships change. Your energy changes. These are real, physical things that shift when self-trust becomes the default.

* The difference between the objective being don’t fall ever versus how will I get back up again — and why that shift changes everything

* What it actually feels like when self-trust becomes your default state — and why it’s a practice, not a personality trait you either have or don’t

What changes when you trust yourself is you stop waiting, wishing, hoping — and you start choosing your own path with the awareness that you are choosing it.

That’s the state. That’s what we’re building toward.

This month’s invitation ★

If you have someone in your life who you know is ready for this work — I would love for you to share one of these episodes with them. Introduce them to a world where self-trust is the default.

And if you’re reading this thinking I want this to be my way of life — reach out. You don’t have to be ready. You just have to know you want it. We’ll have a conversation from there. emmalavelle.co

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

You’ve been told to trust your gut. To listen to your instinct. But here’s the thing — anxiety and intuition can feel almost identical. And this episode is about learning to tell them apart.

In this episode:

* Why anxiety and intuition feel so similar — and why that’s not a personal failing

* The lights on the dashboard — the specific words and phrases that tell me I’ve gone into fight or flight before I’ve even noticed

* “I must be missing something” — my personal red light, and what it taught me about my own patterns

* Why we don’t want to skip the adversity — just the unnecessary suffering

* Journaling as a tool for pattern recognition — how to look back without judgment and forward with curiosity

* The five women I trust implicitly — and how community is one of my most important self-trust tools

* What I say to my partner when I suspect I’m triggered — and why having that practice in place means we don’t create harm

* The urgency test — anxiety says it has to happen today. Knowing is expansive. It can wait until tomorrow.

* The mountain walks, the fear of heights melting, and the pull towards wild swimming that I know is coming — that’s intuition. Not urgent. Just certain.

* The gap between knowing and acting — from every relationship I’ve ever ended, I can pinpoint the exact moment I knew. The gap just got shorter each time.

Three questions to sit with this week:

* How does anxiety feel in your body versus intuition?

* How does urgency feel versus trust?

* What practice would you like to start building to tell them apart — and what’s one small thing you could start this week?

The quiet voice doesn’t get louder. You get quieter.

___________________________________________________

I’d love to hear from you — reply here, or come find me on Instagram @emmalavelle.co

If what came up is “I want support with this” — I have spaces open to start in May. Three months, five months, or ten — depending on where you are and what you’re ready for. Book a conversation with me here: emmalavelle.co

If no one else had an opinion — not your partner, your parents, your business coach, your friends, the guy in the coffee shop, no one on Instagram — what would you do?

In this episode:

* Why your opinion is the only consistent thing — even when your brain argues otherwise

* Where the outsourcing habit comes from — and why it made complete sense when it started

* Daisy the dog in Normandy — and what she taught me about how we learn to call painful things love

* What it actually looks like when you’re outsourcing your knowing (buying another course, anyone?)

* The cost — what compounds every time you send yourself the message “I don’t trust myself”

* The somatic practice Anna taught us: how to find gravity and come back to yourself

* Queen seeking guidance vs queen asking what to do — and why that distinction changes everything

* How to practice self-trust in the tiniest moments — before you even get to the big decisions

You can still work with coaches. You can still talk to people. Just go to yourself first.

That’s the whole practice.

This week’s question: Where are you currently outsourcing a decision that you already know the answer to?

Come tell me on Instagram @emmalavelle.co or hit reply — I’d love to hear where you are.

If this has been landing and you’d like support working through it one to one — I have spaces opening in May.

Just reply to this email and let me know where you are in life. I’d love to connect. or schedule a conversation here: emmalavelle.co

It’s Friday, and I nearly turned this into a Substack letter.

But there’s an immediacy to a voice note that writing doesn’t have. No spell check for your own voice. No slowness. Just a thought, and then send (with full Emma struggling to say immediacy in the middle).

So I recorded it instead.

Here’s what happened this morning before I even sat down to work:

* Coffee with a friend at the market behind my house.

* A balcony conversation with a woman from Spanish Catalonia wondering if she should move here with her dog.

* A man who isn’t homeless — as he pointed out — living in his van with two puppies trembling in the cold, who ended up being one of the most interesting people I’ve spoken to in a while.

* A podcast recording with Audrey about our retreat.

* Two conversations with the organic vegetable sellers.

There was also a parking fine that appeared where I made the sign of the cross in gratitude that it’s a French 30€ not a British 80GBP 😆

It was 1pm. And I realised — that rather than me just being about to get to work, had already been a pretty bloody productive morning!

Which made me think about something I explore a lot with my one-to-one clients: whose standards are you using to measure your day? And what would change if you decided for yourself?

I recorded a short voice note about it. It’s in your ears in about two minutes.

And — my calendar is open. I have one Saturday a month where I take calls, and a few spaces to talk this week. If you’re curious about one-to-one work, or you just want to reply and tell me where you are right now — especially if you don’t think support is possible — that’s actually my favourite place to start.

With love from the sunny balcony in Foix, Emma ✨

Because most of us already know. We’ve always known. The gap isn’t clarity. It’s the safety to act on what we know.

In this episode:

* The domestic dog in the forest vs the wolf — and what that tells us about what self-trust actually feels like from the inside

* What I found when I went back through my journals — the same wants showing up across years, cities, and seasons

* Why we don’t act on what we know (hint: it’s not because we don’t know)

* A body-based practice you can do right now to reconnect with what knowing actually feels like

* The trust gap — what it is, why it exists, and how to start closing it one baby step at a time

* What I’m currently building self-trust around — and why I’m doing it one morning walk at a time

The wolf doesn’t check Google Maps. She senses, moves, recalibrates.

That’s the practice.

Where do you currently have a trust gap — and what would change if you had the self-trust to move toward what you already know you want?

I’d love to hear from you — reply here, or come find me on Instagram @emmalavelle.co

If what came up is “I want support with this” — I have spaces open to start in May. Three months, five months, or ten — depending on where you are and what you’re ready for. Book a conversation with me here: emmalavelle.co

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

I’m sharing the same letter today on Joy Ambition and at Joy Studio because it felt relevant for everyone.

An invitation to pause and consider spring cleaning your life today, and to make it EASY, (there’s also the recipe for delicious four ingredient cookies I made last night at the end, you’re welcome!)

It’s something I started myself a few months ago, and only realised what I’d been doing on my walk this morning up to the cross at Foix, sitting at the top to look over the valley and to just be with myself, the clocks changed this morning, the church was packed with a congregation holding bunches of something green and I realised it must be Palm Sunday and gave my inner child a little high five that adult Emma gets to climb a mountain to celebrate love and life instead of having to listen to a very old Irish priest talk about …. I still don’t know… which was life 30 years ago, we are winning today!

Today’s voice note covers the 10 steps:

* Checking the terrain - where are you, who are you today? Think tipping the clothes out on the bed to see what’s actually there.

* Your Joy Code - think values, are yours the same or ready to update?

* Safety. What’s your relationship with it, do you know how to create it?

* Built in pauses. Your rituals, retreats, space to listen to your body, mind and soul.

* Digital wellbeing and AI - what do you need to clear out, update for the life you want?

* Home - is it your sanctuary? What can you do to align today?

* Emotional hygiene and processing. Has your body been able to catch up to your mind in the last few months?

* Your blank page. Clean out the previous expectations, like the white dress you thought would make you feel like a floating bohemian queen but actually feels more like you’re pretending to be a ghost at best and a reluctant KKK extra at worst. Move it. Let the space for what WILL feel fabulous just be there for a minute.

* Engage experimentation mode. Small steps, led by curiosity and play. Movement from stagnation.

* Sleep. Like switching out your heavy winter knits for light fabrics you can move in, revisit just how much sleep and space your brain to do its thing!

PARIS WORKSHOP, SOUTH WEST FRANCE RETREAT, JOY STUDIO, SINGING BOWLS & 1:1 COACHING

I’ll share my list of things that have been supporting me/bringing joy this month below but first some links for ways to support the life you are building below:

* 1:1 Coaching with me in The Life Atelier

* I’m co-hosting a workshop in Paris with amazing Dom of Well In France, you can sign up for her email list here and I’ll share the link to join shortly too!

* Joy Studio - our community for women to make money doing what they love - right now your first 2 weeks are gifted!

* BLOOM - our September retreat, doors open this week, hit reply if you want the details!

This Week

* Monday co-working in Joy Studio 12:00 -13:15 CET

* Monday breathwork in Joy Studio 17:00-17:20 CET

* Wednesday - French Conversation TOULOUSE 11:00-12:00 CET

* Wednesday open coaching (not recorded, show up live ideally!) with me in Joy Studio 13:00 CET

Also - Singing Bowl sessions with Audrey, one of the most magical additions to my toolbox for processing emotions and creating balance, and if you’re in Toulouse reach out and I’ll share her details with you, I don’t understand how they work but they do 😆

Have an amazing Sunday!

Emma ✨

Emma’s March List :

* This article:

Shared by More Than Just Views made me teary eyed about how much I love Toulouse, could be fun to look for your own version for your home!

* THIS home - wow. So many ideas!

* COOKIES! 3 Ingredient Banana Oatmeal Cookies

* Reve where we host our BLOOM retreat has some magical updates that should be ready for September!

* Links to the AI videos/Homing Podcast mentioned in the episode below!

What actually happens when you ask for what you want? Not the rehearsed version, not the carefully managed version — the real ask, from a place of genuine okayness with whatever comes back.

In this episode:

* The Bumble message that started everything — and why being okay with the no changed everything

* Why asking for what you want has nothing to do with certainty and everything to do with safety

* The 12-4-3-5 lifestyle — and the Monday morning walk in the mountains that started it

* What happened the first time Emma said out loud that she wanted a partner and children

* Javi and Blanca — the couple in Madrid who proved you really can have all of it

* Why the no moves you closer and the not asking costs you something you don’t get back

The want snap. The borrowed fears. The fox fur. And now — the ask itself.

This is what March has been about.

If you already knew the answer was yes — what would you ask for?

If what came up is “I want support with this” — I have two spaces left to start in April. Three months, five months, or ten — depending on where you are and what you’re ready for. Book a conversation with me here.

In this episode:

* Why we carry beliefs long past the season they belong to — and why we stop noticing the weight

* The quiet conviction that cost Emma the most — and what happened when she finally put it down

* Why taking up space gets to look exactly like you — intimate, quiet, loud, however you’re designed

* The small flashpoints from childhood where we learned to stop trusting ourselves

* The woman in the Toulouse café, the cappuccino that went cold, and why Emma didn’t get quieter

There will be consequences to being yourself. There will always be someone whose cappuccino goes cold. But that cost is nothing compared to the energy you lose every day making yourself easier to digest.

Notice where you’re contracting today. Just one place. That’s enough.

If what came up is “I want support with this” — I have two spaces open to start in April. One-to-one, bespoke, deeply held. Book a conversation with me here.

In this episode:

* Why “when things are calmer” is your brain keeping you exactly where you are

* The sophisticated self-protection behind never quite starting

* What it costs you to keep waiting for external permission

* The difference between being ready and deciding you’re ready

* A simple practice for returning borrowed fears to the people they belong to

The runner is the person running. Not the person who’s done enough kilometres.

I decide when I’m ready. Try saying it out loud. Notice what comes up.

If what came up is “I want support with this” — I have two spaces open to start in April. One-to-one, bespoke, deeply held. No waiting until things are calmer.

Learn More & Book a conversation with me here ✨

“I want to be rich — but not wealthy. That doesn’t seem fair.” “I want to take up space — but I’m not ready yet.” “I want to go for that job — but I’ll do another certificate first.”

This is the art of wanting less than you’re allowed. And most of us have perfected it without even realising.

In this episode I’m exploring the moment the bungee snaps you back — why it happens, where it comes from, and what it means to start building capacity to want more than you’ve decided you’re allowed.

I share a story about a library that nobody used, what Gordon Ramsay’s son said that I’ve never forgotten, and my own quiet belief that I could have love or success — but never both.

This one is an invitation to notice your edge. You don’t have to do anything with it yet. Just let yourself see it.

I have two spaces open this month for The Life Atelier — my 1:1 coaching journey. If this episode landed somewhere real for you, reply to this email or visit emmalavelle.co to find out more.

Posted from a sun-drenched bedroom in Foix, in the Pyrenees — this one might make you say “oh, f**k off, Emma.” That’s okay. Stay with me.

You are your scariest bully.

And here’s why that’s actually the best news you’ve received all week.

When we fear criticism from others, what we’re really afraid of is that we’ll believe it — and then turn it on ourselves. Our brain doesn’t know the attacking voice is coming from inside the house. It just feels under threat. And when we’re under threat, we close down. We stop learning. We stop adapting. We stop going after the thing.

So if you’ve been wondering why it feels so hard to start the business, have the conversation, ask for the relationship you want, put yourself out there — it might not be fear of them. It might be fear of what you’ll do to yourself if it doesn’t go perfectly.

I also share in this episode:

* The kinked hosepipe metaphor (your creativity and spontaneous ideas are in there — they just need the kink released)

* The kid in the dinosaur costume test — a brilliantly useful way to know whether criticism is worth sitting with or completely irrelevant

* Why the things you most admire in other people are also already in you

* How I asked for the relationship I wanted, got a no, and why it was one of the most liberating moments of my life

* What “befriending the bully” actually looks like in a real moment of fear (hint: it involves sitting on a kitchen floor with a dog)

The answer to “how long will this take?” is: as long as you resist self-compassion.

Which means the moment you choose it, things can shift. Fast.

🧭 Want to use these tools in real time?

I’m running a free live workshop this Friday — 14 spaces left (one of you’s already grabbed yours, hello 👋).

I’ll be teaching the SovReina Compass — my most up-to-date method for using self-compassion as a practical navigation system, not just a nice idea.

This is intimate by design.

Stop Building Someone Else’s Dream.

From Should to Want: A Workshop on Building the Life You Actually Desire with 1:1 Coaching Sessions

💬 Working with me 1:1

I only ever take on two new clients per month,

— so I can show up fully: WhatsApp voice notes, deep dives, real partnership.

If that’s calling to you, I’ll be sharing more about it on the Friday call or hit reply with the word SUNSHINE and we can schedule a conversation before!

See you there. And if it isn’t sunny where you are — it’s coming. I promise. 🌞

It’s called Creating a Song With the Audience, and it features a young musician named Jacob, standing in front of an orchestra. He starts simply: strings play something small. Another section joins. Then another. And then — he turns to the audience.

That’s the moment everything changes.

One comment in the video captured it perfectly: “It wasn’t emotional until the audience was participating. Collective human experience in aggregate magic.”

I had goosebumps just writing about it. I have them now.

In this episode, I’m breaking down exactly what happens in that video — and why it’s a perfect map for what coaching looks and feels like.

What you’ll hear:

The four things that make that kind of magic possible — and how they mirror the coaching journey: holding space so there’s safety to play, the trust and vulnerability that follows, the baby steps of collaboration (and the very real risk of rejection), and then the moment when the energy cascades and suddenly everything shifts.

I also share a very real story from my week — a day that involved two car journeys, a metro, two cancelled trains, a taxi, a broken-down car, two buses, and a very kind French bus driver who made it all a little more human.

Because that’s what happens when you do the work: you show up pre-topped up. Life still happens, but you meet it differently.

The big idea:

We’re not coaching you to strive for something you’re not. We’re coaching you back to you — comfortable in your skin, in every context — and letting what you create from there surprise everyone, including yourself.

If you’re listening to this thinking yes, me, let’s go — reply JOY and we’ll organise a conversation about coaching together. ✨

P.S. Wednesday is officially DW Day — Do Whatever the F**k I Like Day. Protect your energy accordingly!

Welcome to today’s voice note - a tool to skip the struggle of searching for power outside of yourself and instead get to just put down the exhausting illusion that you’re not powerful.

Episode notes below, let me know how this lands in the comments!

Next Steps:

* If you’re interested in deep support and accelerated results, learn about working with me 1:1 here

* Find out about The Joy Studio community for international women making money and doing what the love right here! Founding members price ends this Sunday ✨

How to Actually Be Powerful (By Lowering the Bar) - TAKE 2

Opening: The Lesson Repeated

Welcome back to Voice Notes, Joy Ambition Voice Notes from me, Emma Lavelle.

And this is the second time that I’m recording this today—because life gives you the lessons you need to learn again and again.

So I can report that I’m looking out of my window from the top of the tiny house that I rented in Foix (F-O-I-X, in case you’re curious) in the Pyrenees in France. And it is basically the French dream. You know, when we think about moving to live in the countryside or a small town in France, you see shutters—that’s definitely a part of it—and wibbly wobbly rooftops going up into the sky.

It’s very beautiful and it’s sunny, compared to this morning when it was very cozy and cloudy.

The Meta-Lesson

And I think it’s really fun, actually, in connection to the topic of our voice note today—which is how to actually be powerful and the tool of actually being powerful by lowering the bar—it is so perfect that I got this lesson.

Because I came, I plugged in my microphone... although I now suspect I did not, when I’m evaluating what happened and why the sound quality was so bad on the podcast this morning. I do believe I did not plug the microphone in. I think that’s what happened.

But I thought I was plugging it in and connecting, and the intention with these voice notes was to create something much more raw and authentic and unpolished than the podcasts that are now arriving in my podcast player.

The Spotify Observation

When I was looking at some podcasts in Spotify this week—because as all of us with Apple phones know, there are periods where there’s just no storage, and so I deleted the podcast app off my phone and was like, “Oh, how can I listen to podcasts? Let’s have a look at Spotify”—every single episode had a beautifully slick studio-style video.

So what happened is I found myself watching videos of podcasts. And then I thought, “Wait a minute, now I’m back at TV. What’s going on?”

In my own experience, when there is a video, even though when I record a video to go with a podcast I’m kind of talking to myself, it changes how you interact because you lose that intimacy.

I think the original reason that I fell in love with podcasts and how they changed the way that I was living life was years ago when I was in the forest in Normandy—because life had happened—and there was that intimacy of it really feeling like you were connecting with another person and it was a very one-to-one conversation.

Realigning with Intention

Now podcasts seem to be going in a different direction and that’s okay, but that’s not what I want to do here.

So I set this intention for these voice notes to feel like you’ve picked up your phone and you’ve got a message from me and it’s got something that brings you joy, brings you motivation, maybe sometimes brings you the tough love that you need, that helps you to do what it is that you need to do.

And what happens, even though I have that intention—I plug my microphone in and it’s so easy—why not just record a video at the same time? It’s for Substack. And then because I’ve got the video, oh well, then my social media content is done already.

So I think that’s the first lesson, right?

Power is not doing things because they’re available and because other people are doing them.

Power is also pausing to check in with what is it that you want to do and want to create, and just realigning with that. Like noticing that, “Oh, I was doing things for a different reason,” and then just realigning. That doesn’t need to be a problem.

The Core Message: You Are Powerful

So my intention today is that you have a tangible tool that you can use to reconnect with the fact that you are powerful.

You are powerful.

And I would love for you to just pause and even say that—you know, say it out loud if you want to: “I am powerful.”

And just see how that resonates. How does it feel in your body? Are there any words that appear after you say it in your head?

Why I Know You’re Powerful

I want to share with you that I know you’re powerful because you’re a human being and you have a brain.

And if you are listening to this (not watching it because there’s no video), but if you’re listening to this, you’re in the top 3-7%—I don’t know what the data is exactly, but I remember reading in terms of how much money do you have to live on a day: if you’ve even got more than a dollar, you’re in the top 10% of the world.

So you do have more influence, a higher starting point than you may realize.

And that’s not to say in a “oh, you’re lucky and you don’t even know that you’re lucky” way. It’s not about that. It’s just like: Okay, wait, what tools do I possibly have at my disposal that I didn’t realize?

The main one being your brain—that’s what I’m here to do, is to show you how to activate that.

When Your Brain Fights Back

And if your brain is fighting with that and saying, “Well, that’s not true. I failed at this, I’ve messed this up, I can’t do this, all of these things. Other people are able to do this, but not me”—what I want you to think about is the example that I always give my clients:

My dog Rita and her nose.

Just because it’s a dog’s nose—not because she’s a special... She’s got her face buried in the quilt next to me. But not because she’s a special magical dog, but just because she’s a dog—her dog nose is really powerful. That’s it.

Now, is it trained? Not really. Does it need to be? I mean, not really. I organize her food, she has everything she needs in many ways around her. But if she was suddenly without me and she was in a forest and she needed to find food, that nose would activate very quickly. She would learn how to use it and it would become powerful.

So your brain is just the same—it’s the human version of the dog’s nose. Just by being a human brain, it has that.

Signs You’re Disconnected From Your Power

Let’s start by looking at where might you not be in awareness or consciousness of that power that you have. And that’s the first step—recognizing that.

Now, I wanted to bring this to you because it’s a lesson that I had last week and it’s a tool that I’ve been using to just remind myself that I am powerful. And even when it feels like things are scary and they’re out of my control and I feel trapped, that doesn’t mean I am trapped. It doesn’t mean that I can’t change things. It just means I’ve forgotten that I’m powerful. I haven’t been able to stay connected to that because that’s life.

Sign #1: Urgency

Some signs that you might be feeling disconnected and unconscious of that power that you have are when there is urgency.

Listen to the language that you’re using. Do you feel that stuff has to happen today? There’s a deadline—the deadline is this or this. Or if it doesn’t happen by tomorrow then there’s no point doing it. Is that what’s happening?

Is it happening in conversations that you’re having? Is it happening in your head? Are you feeling triggered by things and then immediately needing to solve them, instead of being able to pause and give them space and be curious and return to yourself and check in with: “Hang on, am I getting all of the information here? Am I checking in with myself?”

Why Reconnecting With Power Matters

Now we want to be able to access this power—or not even access it because it’s always there—but like, stop blocking it and distracting ourselves from it, because it affects everything that we do in life.

It affects:

* The decisions that we take

* The actions that we have

* Our relationships

* How we set our goals

* How we experience life

If you are someone that always feels that you don’t have enough time and things will be better in the future, then that’s a really good sign to pause and ask: “How can I create that feeling right now? How can I see what it is I have in my current life and who I am and just really delight in being you in this moment?”

From Urgency to Trust

It creates this incredible trust in place of urgency.

And it means that when we do achieve our goals, we’re really able to enjoy them and connect with them and be with them.

And I think about this as savoring. You know, like having a delicious meal and you savor the meal and you can think back and you’re like, “Oh, that was such a good meal.”

I still remember one of my favorite questions to ask people is: “What’s the best meal that you’ve had?”

And I still remember when I was 18—so it’s more than 20 years ago now—having a chili. It wasn’t vegan and I’m vegan now. It was a very meaty chili. And it was one that my friend’s parents had been cooking up in Inverness.

We’d gone on this walk with the dogs through the hills. There was a wooden bridge—maybe I’m making it more dramatic in my head—but it went over this gorge, this really deep crevice. And I was terrified of heights at the time and I did it. And the dogs ran ahead of me and we just had such a good day. And I was so hungry when I got back and the fire was on and we had this food and it was just... it was so good.

And I still think about that meal. It still comes up 20 years later.

And we want our experiences—to have a moment like that each day, I think. Even if it’s just for a few seconds, just something that anchors us.

And that’s how we start to create spaciousness and having time and being present and knowing that we’re powerful.

The Problem With Traditional Belief Work

So this is where I would invite you to think about this concept of lowering the bar so that you can actually be powerful.

Now, I want to focus on this “being powerful” because what I see happen a lot in the coaching space or the personal development space is this idea of affirmations or what they call in a lot of coaching “belief work, belief work.”

The 20 Pages Story

And I worked with a coach who—now I can laugh about it, but at the time I was really like, “Oh, am I missing something? Am I getting this wrong?”

And that’s actually one of my signals. When I hear myself saying “Am I missing something?” or “I must be missing something,” it usually tells me that I’ve forgotten I’m powerful, I’m in fight-or-flight, and I’m searching. I’m searching outside of myself.

And so at that point, I stop and I use the tool that I’m going to teach you to return to myself.

So when people teach belief work or affirmations where you’re repeating like “I am powerful” but you don’t really believe you’re powerful, what it does is create almost like a... I don’t know, the image I have in my head is of a little kid trying to walk in their parents’ high heels.

And it’s like they’re doing it, but it’s not comfortable. It costs a lot of energy to be like... well, any of you that have worn a pair of shoes or a pair of heels that are half a size too big—which I did in a five-star restaurant before Christmas with tissues stuffed into the toe (which was the trick my friend shared with me who has a corporate background)...

It was like I looked super glamorous and, you know, the very image of woman, French style, living life, powerful. And every time I went to the bathroom I was like, “Oh God, how do I focus on keeping these bloody shoes on?”

The Shoes Metaphor

And I think that’s what a lot of us are doing, where we’re like, “I’m powerful, I’ve got this.”

And this coach that I was working with, she kind of told us that we weren’t doing the mindset work, which was like: “You need to get into the mental space that the thing that you’re doing has already worked, it’s happening.”

And she said, “I used to feel like I could fill 20 pages of belief work.”

And I thought, “What? Okay, if that’s the way...”

Anyway, there’s another way, friends, and I’m going to share it with you.

The Rosary Comparison

The other way that’s much easier than doing the endless pages—which for me reminded me of having to go and do rosary beads when I was at a Catholic primary school (and I wasn’t particularly Catholic and it was very like “I have to go sit in a church with this string of beads and say these things”)... like, okay, if I have to do it, okay. But it never really made sense to me.

The Tool: Connecting With Gravity

Now, what does make sense to me is connecting with yourself and making that observation, as I shared with you, that all dogs have a magical dog nose, which is just a dog nose. All humans have a brain. We are all powerful.

Now, how do we remember that?

Anna’s Workshop

So what I love to do and that I have been using is something I learned in a workshop that my friend Anna did at the Joy Studio, which is the community that I have for women entrepreneurs. Some of you might be in it as well.

She was teaching us how to unlock the magic of our nervous system—not to see it as something that needs to be updated and managed (which is really how I had been teaching it before, but it didn’t quite align)—and instead to really unlock the magic of it, to open dialogue, to ask: “What if we’re already perfect? What if your entire body and mind is already perfect?”

The Rewilding Analogy

Just as nature is. And we see rewilding sites when humans stop throwing chemicals on it and trying to control it—nature just does her thing. And sometimes it’s brutal. Often it’s brutal. And there’s pain. But there’s also astonishing beauty and power.

And so what if for you, it’s not about doing things differently, but as Anna said: not doing the wrong things so that the right thing can just naturally happen.

Beyond the Five Senses

So she helped us to connect with our senses beyond the five that you usually think of—taste, touch, sound, hearing, sight—but also our internal balance.

Our sense of gravity. How do we stay upright when we walk? How do we not float up in the air? We don’t need to consciously think about it. It’s just there. Gravity is holding us.

The Exercise

And so she got us doing an exercise that I’d love for you to do now with me, which is to just close your eyes and ask yourself: How do you feel gravity? How do you know gravity is acting on you?

And you can feel where your body touches the earth. If you’ve got your feet on the floor, you can feel that. I don’t—I’m cross-legged, sitting on top of a very tall bed. But what I did was, and what I’ll do now, is I hugged myself.

And I really just felt: Gravity is holding me. That’s my power. Right there.

I feel the gravity and I feel the power.

Building the Practice

Okay, now when you can do that and you can just pause and breathe into that space and become aware of your power, now a mantra or an affirmation can be useful—almost to extend or ground into that sensation, because it’s a practice.

We’re all at different phases. You know, for me, this is my work. This is what I teach. I’ve been working on my coaching tools for five years now. So I would say that I feel powerful—I mean, I’m not aware of it, it’s just I just know, I just am—maybe 80% of the time.

But then life happens and I’m still a human. And the important thing is I have the tools to get back to it.

Meeting Yourself Where You Are

So if you’re in that period and you may listen to this and say, “I’m at 1% power”—that’s okay. It’s just building that muscle.

So you might do that exercise to connect to gravity and your power and then create a mantra to help you practice staying in that feeling and building capacity to have that feeling.

And what I like to do here, for example, is to say:

* “I slow down to speed up.”

* “I lower the bar now so I can raise the bar later.”

And that can look like really checking in with where you are now and lowering your standards for a little bit so that you can build that capacity to be powerful, so that you don’t have to spend so much energy on trying to be powerful.

Letting your body catch up with the fact that you are powerful.

The Dog Walking Story

A very practical example is that this week I moved to this new city and there are an awful lot of dogs off lead—or that’s what I was telling myself.

The first few days, it was very sunny, people were outside everywhere, and the story I was telling myself is: “My God, there are thousands... I didn’t say thousands, but I said, ‘This city is full of off-lead dogs, it’s full of them, oh my God, I don’t know what to do, how am I going to handle this?’”

And I was so disconnected from the fact that I had power and decisions and freedom and choices to make that I just tried to continue my usual routine: The dog gets two walks a day outside and these have to happen. Yes or yes.

The Bench Incident

And there was one afternoon—I think it was the second day or the third day, maybe the second day. I took Rita for her walk. I got back and there’s a park directly in front of the beautiful house that I’m in. And there was a gentleman asleep on the bench with his extremely large dog also on the bench.

And I didn’t know if the dog had a lead, didn’t have a lead, if it was friendly, if it wasn’t friendly.

And quite honestly, when I am in a moment of forgetting that I’m powerful, it doesn’t really matter if the dogs are on a lead or not and they’re calm, because they sense my panic.

So I’ve already, as our trainer says, I’ve already pulled the trigger in that context.

And I felt just so powerless because I couldn’t—in my head I couldn’t get into my house and I was exposed and therefore I couldn’t create safety for me and for Rita.

Finding Help

So I went for another walk. I came back—still there. Beautiful sunny day, sleeping very happily, very comfortably.

And I thought: “Okay, gravity. I’m held. I’m powerful. I know what to do. I always solve these situations. I’m going to go find someone.”

So I took Rita around the corner, I cornered the first person that looked friendly, and I asked her to help me with this situation.

Option A was give the gentleman a little nudge and ask if he wouldn’t mind moving just for a few minutes so we could get into the house. And this amazing girl went over and then came back and she said, “He says no.”

And I said, “Okay, he says no. Perfect.”

The Solution

But then what she did was she said to me, “Look, let’s go together and I’ll stand between you and the dog. How does that feel?”

And I was like, “Okay, let’s do this. Thank you.”

So it’s that connection and that support when you don’t feel powerful—and this is where coaching comes in as well and community—so that when you have these moments, there’s someone else to hold you like gravity, because they can still see that you can do this even though you can’t see it, just long enough for you to breathe and remember that you can do it.

Processing and Compassion

And we got to the house. I got in. I sat on the floor. I felt my heartbeat. I felt Rita looking at me like, “What happened? It was bad, right? What happened?”

And I used self-compassion and I said: “That was really hard. We’re doing a really good job, baby. We’re doing it.”

And that self-compassion let me return to the power to then give myself space to regulate and to ask: “Okay, what does lowering the bar look like while I can build up my resilience?”

Lowering the Bar in Practice

And it looks like:

* 10-minute walks

* Not going out at night because I feel safer when I can see things

And so we lowered the bar for a few days. And within a week, I felt safe enough to start living normal life. And Rita felt safe enough to start living normal life.

The Practice for This Week

So, for you to remember this week:

When you don’t feel powerful, find the words that indicate to you (I just paused then because Rita let out a very big breath) that you’re not connected to the fact that you’re powerful, you’re not conscious of it.

Create that consciousness. Remember: “I’m held, I’m powerful.”

And then use a mantra or an affirmation so that you can really deepen your connection to it and just practice—just practice being there.

Closing

Okay, amazing humans, I would love to hear how this landed for you.

If you have any questions about it, you’ll be able to comment on Substack.

And if you are thinking about working together and exploring these kinds of concepts, these kinds of tools more deeply:

* You can message me about one-to-one coaching

* Or you can come over to the Joy Studio if you are looking to work on the community side of things and the business side of things as well—that’s more of a group container

Have a beautiful Wednesday!

This episode covers:

* How to tell the difference between wanting something and expecting it — and why that distinction quietly shapes our relationships.

* Why creating safety for yourself is the starting point for any honest conversation about what you actually want (not just what you think should be enough).

* The practice of learning to want — without collapsing into entitlement, resentment, or self-abandonment.

* How expectations are often wants that haven’t been clearly communicated.

* Why communication is a skill you “messily master” over time, not something you get right once and forever.

* How this shows up across all relationships: romantic, work, friendships, environment, even with plants and animals.

* The role of space, slowness, and silence in emotional processing and creative integration.

* Why consuming information faster isn’t the same as integrating it — and how stopping creates clarity.

* The link between nervous system safety, attention, and the way we relate to time and technology.

* Why presence, focus, and energy are some of the most meaningful things we give — and the subtle expectations that can come with that.

* A simple reflection exercise: identifying what you need, what you want, and what you give freely.

* How cultural conditioning and unspoken contracts influence what we expect from others.

ACTIVATE THE THEORY:

The question to sit with: is this a want I’m willing to learn how to communicate — even if the answer is no?

If this resonated with you and you’re ready to explore how working together could change your understanding of yourself and your life click here to take the first step!

Share what you discover in the comments, I’d love to hear how this landed for you!

Emma ✨

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

My invitation to you is to focus on the four steps this week (recognise, interrupt, compassion, practice), and tell me how it goes, post your reflections and questions in the comments!

If you want to go deeper in this work, you can apply for 1:1 coaching right here — or just hit reply with a few sentences on what you’d like to change if you’re reading this in your inbox and we’ll start there!

And I also want to know your thoughts on this TED talk which I loved, a huge shift in perspective on climate and the economy, loved it and now have the life goal of becoming an impact investor as a result!

See you Tuesday!

Emma ✨

EPISODE NOTES

This episode covers:

* How self-trust gets disrupted and why second-guessing isn’t a personal flaw

* Why the brain offers changing “reasons” to stop you — and how to spot when it’s not fact, it’s protection

* The difference between internal validation and external validation (and why external validation never feels safe)

* How culture, childhood experiences, and social media interfere with your inner compass

* Why self-trust can exist strongly in some areas of life and feel absent in others

* How blind spots are part of being human — and why support, coaching, and community matter

* The moment my own internal compass was restored by naming a hidden pattern

* The four practical steps to reconnect with self-trust and internal validation

* What self-trust actually feels like in the body (calm, grounded, sometimes boring)

* How real confidence includes being comfortable saying “I don’t know”

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

Three podcasts I loved this week and why:

* Esther Perel on Diary of a CEO — a masterclass in calm authority, curiosity, and gentle-but-firm challenge.

* Heather Gryzch (author of The Ayurvedic Guide to Fertility) — a powerful reflection on rebuilding trust with my body and questioning box-ticking expectations (like egg freezing as “the plan”).

* Trevor Noah + Dr Jessica Knurick — how to spot real expertise vs performative confidence online.

Welcome to today’s voice note — it’s the first where I’ve sourced a question from you, my community, and I’ve loved hearing from you. So if you have topics you’d like me to dive into, hit reply or comment on the podcast topic page right here:Pick your podcast topics this month

I’ll dive into the question and then, at the end, share my own experience with this exact issue and the three steps I took to go from believing (and taking action from) “Money is dangerous” to “Money is beautiful!”

The question:

I have a mental gap between “wow, I’m amazing, I CAN ask for more money and I AM worth it and this income CAN be sustainable” and “but it’s a crisis, the market, be real bla bla bla”. I know where the latter comes from, but it’d be cool to have a magic wand to fight these kinds of thoughts away.

The bullet points:

* Self-belief and motivation — how are you actively protecting and rebuilding both?

* The word “fighting” — any time we’re fighting a belief, we’re using up a lot of energy, all the time. Instead, we want to make space to listen to the emotion behind the belief, process that emotion, create safety for it, and THEN think about what we really believe once we can get to neutral curiosity.

* Our idea of “more money” is subjective. Instead, think about what you are creating, how you are positioning yourself, and how you see yourself.

* How we relate to money — so many of us use money, like time, as the villain for why we can’t have or be who we want to be. It’s the perfect way for our brain to keep us stuck. So you can ask yourself: if money or time isn’t responsible for creating my results, what is? And into this space often appear collaborations, innovation, and creative solutions.

* Pause to actually work out what sustainable is. There is a market for everything and everyone — the key is to align yourself so that your person can find you.

* How do you best work? What pricing supports you in prioritising your energy? The Don Draper calibration is helpful here.

* How are you valuing yourself? A fast, “cut the b******t” question I ask is: what would my male counterpart be offering? That usually tells me if I’m undervaluing myself.

* What do you want for your clients? What are you modelling for them?

* What’s driving your current thoughts about “more” money and sustainability? Are you comparing yourself to others? Are you not taking responsibility for what you can do? Are there parts of your offer that feel unclear or that you don’t feel good about?

Emma’s case study — tool to apply:

I called this episode Money Is Beautiful because my own relationship with money has changed from money is dangerous to money is beautiful, and I want to share that as a case study to walk you through the steps of this evolution.

* Identify a problem — e.g. you don’t have the money or relationship with money you want.

* Identify the root cause — usually a belief you picked up in childhood.For me, money was always present when there was conflict or friction in my home, so my little brain associated money with a mysterious monster that hurt people I loved. It was scary, and yet we seemed to need it. So while I never had any difficulty earning money, I would magic it into something safe and good as quickly as possible — education, food, others, even paying for people to look after animals I found in the Spanish countryside.

* Heal the rupture.This is where you get to work identifying reality by zooming out, then picking language that works for you. I tried money is energy, money is a tool, money is neutral — all the things I’d heard from other people — but it didn’t click. Then, as I was thinking about the things money, in partnership with amazing humans, could do — ending homelessness in our city, creating safe spaces for animals in shelters while working on longer-term problems, conservation, small businesses, art and creativity, research for the pure curiosity of it — I heard the phrase “Money is beautiful.” And that felt like a full-body, yup, this is true.

Then practise.

Books I’d recommend for deeper belief work (if it interests you):

* The Soul of Money — Lynne Twist

* The Art of Money — Bari Tessler

Next steps — work together:

If you’d like to learn about working with me 1:1 to dive into this work more deeply, you can find the link in the episode notes, or just hit reply to this email with the word JOY and I’ll share the page with you.

But first we lay the foundation to how to use Joy in relation to fear & resilience, then where your relationship to Ambition comes into play.

I hope you enjoy it, let me know what you discover in the comments!

If this has resonated with you? You’re probably ready for 1:1 coaching!

If you already have a goal in mind….

but the thing blocking you is fear, not knowing where to start or it feeling too big then The Dream Life Project is the place for 5 months of deep support, you can fill in the application form here.

If you’re not sure what you want…

…. and the priority is creating clarity, then a single session is a great place to start ↓

I’ve opened 2026 Clarity & Momentum Coaching Sessions.

Early-bird offer:The first 3 people to book receive 30% offUse code SLOW-PLEASE👉 €275 instead of €395

This is for people who want clean decisions, steadier energy, and movement that actually lasts.

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* *Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the YearGood Night 2025 — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

What’s inside THIS episode:

00:00 — Starting the year with spaceReflection on creating calm, slow beginnings and why relationships with yourself matter when planning the year. Topics touched on: boundaries, self-trust, and creating safety nets.

04:00 — Joy as a resilience toolHow fear blocks creativity and action, and how joy becomes the energy that allows movement despite fear. Includes the lake/sauna story as an example of practicing joy in the face of fear.

12:00 — Ambition as motivationWhy most goals are too small, how to stretch your imagination, and the invitation to consider your own 80% greater capacity.

14:30 — The 5 steps of Joy Ambition:

* Want — Define what you authentically desire, free from outside pressures.

* Shed — Let go of beliefs, habits, or clutter that hold you back.

* Nourish — Support yourself physically, mentally, and socially to sustain momentum.

* Bloom — Activate your plan: map, execute, and evaluate.

* Be — Integrate and pause after intense effort; reflect and learn from successes and failures.

18:00 — Closing thoughtsReframing failure as data, honoring the learning process, and returning to your next “want” with fresh clarity.

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

🐆 Grab your notion doc to do the exercises here ✨

Inside this episode:

* Why motivation is unreliable — and identity is not

* The simple phrase that cuts through overthinking instantly

* How “I am someone who…” changes behaviour without force

* Using identity as a daily anchor, not a mindset trick

* Small, embodied examples you can apply immediately

* How this tool supports clarity, self-trust, and calm follow-through

This is about choosing who you’re being — on purpose — before the day runs you.

Ready to turn clarity into grounded momentum?

I’ve opened 2026 Clarity & Momentum Coaching Sessions.

This is for people who want clean decisions, steadier energy, and movement that actually lasts.

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Which meant learning how to be in water.

And I was scared of water, very scared.

But I wanted to be the person who could surf, so I created my sequence and decided that I would just get in water whenever the opportunity arose especially with someone I could learn from.

So while I did not surf in 2025, I DID get in a lot of wild water spots, I learnt how to be cold, to be still, I learnt what going at my own pace feels like to an even more powerful level.

Today’s voice note talks about the ‘action’ piece - how to actually get into your version of the water before you have learnt how to swim, something I did the summer before on a paddleboard with a life jacket and a strong swimming best friend nearby who pointed out if I can balance on a yoga mat I could probably balance on a paddleboard!

She was right. And it was a pivotal moment for me in seeing a skill I didn’t realise I had!

We all have blind spots, it’s how we’re designed but once you get support identifying yours you can work with them not against them.

If you’d like to get my eyes on yours so that we can pinpoint your strengths and get clear on the best goal to focus on in February, grab one of the Clarity & Momentum Sessions below ↓

✨ 3-Week Clarity & Momentum Session – January Only ✨

Start the year with focus, clarity, and momentum in just 3 weeks.

What’s included:

* 45-minute 1:1 coaching session – tailored to your current edge

* Pre-session form to pinpoint exactly where you want focus

* 2 weekly check-ins via voice note/email for 2 weeks after your session – to keep momentum and accountability

* Total process: 3 weeks from start to finish

Why it works: This isn’t a typical session—it’s a short, intensive process that gives you clarity, confidence, and actionable steps.

Spots are limited. January only.

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* *Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

🐆 CLICK HERE TO GRAB YOUR JOY JOURNAL PAGE WITH EXERCISES 🐆

This episode is about the step we love to skip — nourishing.

Not as a nice-to-have. Not as self-care theatre. But as the thing that quietly determines whether anything else actually works.

Nourishing is how you set yourself up for success — in your body, your nervous system, your goals, your relationships, your creativity. Especially if you’ve been in survival for a long time (and let’s be honest, most of us have).

In this episode, I walk you through five concepts you can use to evaluate and strengthen your skill of nourishing — gently, honestly, and without pretending you’re someone you’re not.

You’re invited to notice:

* Which of these you’re already doing

* Where you might turn the dial up 1%

* Which ones feel new, uncomfortable, or quietly relieving

The five nourishing concepts

* SequencesNourishing starts before you take action.We look at how to map sequences — where something begins, how it ends, and how to include rest before and after anything that costs energy. This applies to goals, conversations, emotional work, creative projects, and change. Slow, intentional sequencing is what builds real capacity.

* Nourishing the body (rest + food)Resting like a lioness.Feeding yourself in a way that matches the season you’re actually in — not the ideal one. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about micro-adjustments that increase your chance of success, whether that’s home-cooked meals or soup from a can.

* Asking for supportOne of the most underestimated nourishing skills.Asking for support nourishes you and gives others permission to do the same. It builds trust, connection, and resilience — and it matters more than getting everything “right” on your own.

* Nature + digital-free timeA double nervous-system reset.We explore how even tiny moments of connection with nature, paired with time away from screens, can radically shift fight-or-flight and expand your window of tolerance — especially when you’re doing something new or scary.

* Nourishing yourself with languageHow you speak to yourself shapes your capacity.This is about replacing impatience and self-brusqueness with language that creates safety, compassion, and connection — especially in moments when younger parts of you are activated.

This episode is longer because nourishing is foundational — and because it’s the step we rush past on our way to “doing”, “activating”, and “achieving”.

Tomorrow, we move into activation — but only because we’ve built something solid to stand on first.

Take your time with this one.Nourishing isn’t indulgent. It’s strategic.

See you tomorrow!

Emma 🐆

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

In this episode, I’m talking about Shed — the part of Joy Ambition where we create space.

Not by forcing change or urgently hurling everything out.But by paying attention to timing, energy, and what you need to nourish in this present moment, to process and to let go of.

Creating space, shedding what’s done is a skill. Just like wanting.

In this episode, you’ll hear me explore:

* why creating space is seasonal, not something to rush

* the difference between shedding from urgency and shedding from completion

* how slowing down actually allows healing to happen as you let things go

* three practical places to create space:

* your mind

* your body

* your environment

* why silence and fewer inputs can help you hear yourself again

* how space supports creativity, clarity, and trust

* why letting go doesn’t mean something was wrong or a waste of time

As you listen, I really recommend opening the Joy Page in Notion that I’ve created for you.

The prompts there are designed to help you:

* check the energy you’re shedding from

* create space in a way that actually sticks

* move at your own pace, without forcing outcomes

Let me know where you start!

Emma 🐆

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* *Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

But it turns out my passion for The Skill of Wanting burns as brightly as my love affair with nut butter 🤷‍♀️ and in France you can spend the equivalent of a posh bottle of red wine on a blend of cashew, pistachio and hazelnut butter so here we are.

Unrepentant as ever.

La vie Deep Selfish Joy continues.

I’ve also made you a Notion Joy Journal Page to support you right here

So today’s podcast meets voice note is designed to prepare you to build your skill at wanting, I’m going to share thoughts on just how essential this space to dream and want is in the January field notes for paid subscribers along with links to the two documentaries I watched yesterday from the incredible vibrant force that is activist an documentary maker Deeyah Khan but today is about you and making space to be with you and what you want and allowing that to be the most important thing.

In the audio you’ll hear:

* Why the question ‘What do you want?’ is the most important starting point

* How imagination is everything.

* The importance of giving yourself a blank page

* How to avoid creating from a ‘not want’

* How to disentangle your wants from others wants

* How to not limit your wants

* Letting other surprise you and creating conditions for the beauty of the unexpected

* Searching vs exploring energy

* What to do with the fear that can partner the want

* How to find the edge of your desire and how to relax into it.

Let me know what comes up for you, I’ll be back tomorrow with Day 3/7 - Creating SPACE!

Emma 🐆✨🌼

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* *Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

I want to invite you to see your self. Honestly.

Not through the lens of ‘not enough’ or ‘valuable when’

But as I see you. As others see you. Just neutrally.

Which statistically is about 80% more amazing than you’re designed to see yourself.

On my first date with my partner, who is currently happily sending me face bubbles from the top of a -20 degrees mountain whilst I am curled up in my candlelit apartment with the radiators on full blast, I got him to take the four tendencies quiz and triumphantly confirmed his rebel profile.

Something I got to very sweetly share with his family this Christmas as they all took the test too and I saw the little spikes of friction melt into understanding, empathy and then love as they understood themselves and their partners that bit better.

This quiz is one of the first things I do with all my clients, if you haven’t taken it yet I created a resource right here that you can use to understand how to apply the results.

Because before you set any more goals or take any decisions you need to learn how to get to neutral, to rebalance that 80% negativity bias by understanding yourself 1% more each day!

I’ll be back tomorrow where we’ll use what you learn today from taking up space as your 80% more amazing self, let me know how you get on!

Here’s to continuing our Deep Selfish Joy journey in 2026, I’m kicking off with my fancy coffee shop decaf coffee, and coconut cream to get my cosy morning joy drop moment but without the jitters!

Emma ✨

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

The full explanation of how to use in the prompts is in the podcast episode or you can dive in below!

You can do this month by month, season by season or just think over the year if you want.

There is no right or wrong way to do this, you might want to have the list as a Notion Doc/Note in your phone and return to it adding things as you realise them!

You can journal on them or even answer them out loud and walk around using a transcription app if it feels good, I found taking a cold crisp walk across the city today let the answers appear and then added more to them as I moved through the day.

* What are you most proud of this year?

* What was the biggest struggle?

* What tool supported you most?

* What brought you the most joy?

* What do you want to let go of?

* What do you want to double down on?

* What have you learnt about yourself?

* What would feel like a win 30 days from now?

* What would feel magical 3 months from now?

* What would feel impossible but a dream come true 12 months from now?

And with that, I’ll see you tomorrow when we say Good morning to 2026

Thank you for being here,

I’m proud as always to be your coach and guide on this Deep Selfish Joy journey of ours

Emma ✨

Missed an episode?

* Day 7/7 - A Fearless Joyful Life 5 Steps To Achieve ANYTHING!

* Day 6/7 - My instant confidence and power tool — I Am Someone Who

* Day 5/7 — Drama-Free Blooming, Because Wild Flowers Don’t Procrastinate

* Day 4/7 — The Missing Step Between Wanting and Doing

* Day 3/7 — You Don’t Need More Discipline — You Need to Create Space & Build Trust

* Day 2/7 — Does “Desire” make you squirm? Try the Skill of Wanting

* Day 1/7 — Good Morning 2026! Let’s savour this. This is vulnerable — ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

* Begin. Good Night 2025* — 10 Journal Prompts to Savour Closing the Year

Thanks for reading Joy Ambition! This post is public so feel free to share it.

Episode Notes:

Introduction: A Bigger Thing Than You Think You Can Do (00:00)

Welcome to the Joy Ambition podcast, with me, Emma Lavelle.

Today we’re going to have a chat about a brilliant question I received on Instagram. I’m also recording this one as a video — partly because I want to show off my creation, honestly — and partly because it really illustrates the point I want to make.

If this is your first time listening, welcome. The idea of this podcast is that these episodes feel a bit like voice notes from — hopefully — one of your favourite people. You get something real, something practical, something you can actually apply.

I love podcasts that feel conversational rather than high-tech. That’s what we’re doing here.

A Quick Invitation (01:00)

Before we dive in, a quick invitation.

If you haven’t heard of the Joy Studio, it’s my community for international, English-speaking women building businesses. We’re very centred in France, but we also have members from Beijing to — let’s say — Glasgow.

You can come to your first event for free. There’s a calendar where you can choose either an in-person event if you’re local, or an online one if you’re not.

I also have one coaching spot opening in January — the Deep Selfish Joy Journey. If you’ve been thinking about coaching and you have questions, you can message me on Instagram or email me at hello@emmalavelle.co.

The Question: Taking On Something Bigger Than You (02:00)

The question I received was this: how do you take on something that feels bigger than you think you might be able to achieve?

I love this question because it’s something we experience again and again — and because it’s deeply subjective.

Depending on where you are in life, your stress levels, your self-trust, and what you’ve achieved recently (or haven’t), your idea of what feels “too big” will shift dramatically.

Sometimes even the idea of having a shower every day feels unachievable.Sometimes having a shower alone feels unachievable.

And then there are those of you who are achieving a lot — ticking boxes, making money, winning awards — but inner calm and peace feel impossible. Like you can have success or ease, but not both.

That’s why this question matters.

Why Practice Matters (and the Wreath) (03:30)

Because this experience is so subjective, it’s useful to find places where we can practice.

If you’re watching the video, I’m going to show you the wreath I made today. I am ridiculously proud of it. It smells like Christmas tree and eucalyptus, and it’s beautiful.

It’s a handmade gift for my boyfriend’s mother. We decided it’s handmade gifts or nothing — it’s about being together, not consumption.

This is a perfect example of taking on something that felt bigger than me.

Step One: Do You Actually Want This? (04:00)

The first step — and this mirrors my coaching model — is starting with the want.

Why do you want to do this thing?

You can apply this even to something small, like wanting a shower on your own. Why does that matter to you?

With the wreath, I asked myself why I wanted to make it. What we’re checking here is whether the desire is genuine — or whether it’s something we think we should want.

At first I thought, “Well, my co-founder thinks creative workshops are important.”Then I paused. That’s a very school-girl answer.

Do I want to make something beautiful?Do I want to slow down?Do I believe it matters to do things with our hands and connect beyond work?

Yes. That part was true.

Imagining the Result (Without Needing the Map) (05:15)

Next, we imagine having achieved it.

I couldn’t see the full journey from raw materials to finished wreath — but I could imagine the moment of giving it as a gift. I knew I wanted that.

Then we ask another important question:Do I think something about me will change because of this?

If the answer sounds like “I’ll finally feel enough” or “I’ll like myself more,” that’s a gentle warning sign.

The real question then becomes: where am I already enough now?

Step Two: Self-Identity (06:30)

Step two is self-identity — seeing yourself as the person who completes this.

For me, that person values time, connection, and intention more than convenience or spending money.

She’s someone who can reprioritise her day when something matters.She asks for help and support.She lets herself do things her own way.

That identity is something you can connect with before the result exists.

Step Three: The Journey Is the Destination (08:45)

Step three is essential: valuing the journey itself as the destination.

I don’t know who first said this, but I live by it.

A joyful, spacious life comes from loving where you are because of the experience.

I’m someone who always takes the scenic route. I live in France — I could take the toll roads — but that’s not who I am.

I love driving with my dog Rita, stopping in villages, having espresso, chatting with strangers. Even when I know I could arrive faster, I choose the journey.

When something feels bigger than you, the question becomes: how can you decide to enjoy the process now?

Making the Journey Tangible (10:45)

One way I do this is by documenting the journey.

I keep a notebook for each project. This one has an image on the front representing a future dream — a house in the Pyrenees and a small apartment in Toulouse.

Inside are scraps, postcards, notes, even a teabag from a particularly beautiful cup of tea.

The goal matters — but so does delighting in the process of becoming the person who gets there.

Step Four: Pauses (Not Procrastination) (12:00)

Step four is learning how to pause.

When I started the wreath, I noticed two thoughts:“I don’t know how to do this.”“I’m going to do it wrong.”

Not knowing how is normal — it’s the point of learning something new.The fear of doing it wrong is familiar to many of us.

I thought of my dog Rita. When she doesn’t understand what’s happening, she just sits. She pauses. She processes.

So now, when I feel overwhelmed, I pause. I let my body catch up with my mind.

Pauses are not procrastination. They’re not giving up.They’re breathing space.

And learning to pause in moments of urgency is a complete game-changer.

Step Five: Unfurling Energy (14:30)

The final step is what I’m calling unfurling energy.

This isn’t just taking things step by step. It’s staying connected to curiosity and movement — “I don’t know what’s coming, but it’s going to be interesting.”

I think about aerial silks — how they unfurl from the ceiling, light and elegant, yet incredibly strong.

This is about flow, direction, freedom to change course.

When something feels bigger than you, you’re dancing between imagination and action. And you’re allowed to adjust as you go.

Closing & Invitation (16:40)

Let me know how you get on with this.

If you’re a paid member of Joy Ambition, we’ll explore this together in the monthly live.If you’re in the Joy Studio, bring it into coaching.

And if you have topics you’d love me to cover on the podcast or in the letters, send them my way. I love working with your questions.

I’ll see you next week.

Emma 🌼

In this first Field Notes, I’m sharing what’s been not so quietly unfolding behind the scenes of my life and work: a seismic shift away from efficiency-for-efficiency’s sake, and towards something slower, more spacious, more ALIVE.

I'm exploring the idea of unfurling — what happens when we stop forcing growth, stop continuing the harm, and allow regeneration to do what it naturally does. Through city safaris, self-trust experiments, rewilding in life, bedtime rebellions, skin healing, walruses, and inner child reparenting, this episode is an invitation to pause and listen more closely to yourself.

If you’re feeling rushed, tight, or in a silent battle with time — this one’s for you.

EPISODE NOTES:

Why I chose connection over schedule this week — and what that practice actually looks like in real life

The difference between doing things efficiently and doing things spaciously

The concept of unfurling as a way of living, healing, and creating

How nature regenerates when we stop continuing the harm — and how that applies to our nervous systems, habits, and self-talk

Why healing isn’t only about repair, but about interrupting repeated harm & interrupting the harm through curiosity, compassion, and updated support

City safaris: finding joy and presence in places that aren’t “ideal”

Ferns, sails, wind, and movement as metaphors for unfurling

Walruses blocking an icebreaker — and where you might need to “wedge” slowness into your day

Rewilding as a lens for personal growth and self-trust

What stopping highlights, nail polish, and foundation taught me about strength, repair, and letting things breathe

✦ Tools & resources mentioned

15-day Manifestation ChallengeTheme: reparenting your inner child(Healing, self-trust, nervous system repair)

https://tobemagnetic.com/

Book: Wilding by Isabella TreeA powerful exploration of rewilding, regeneration, and what happens when humans stop over-controlling natural systems.

Book: Perfect Skin by Alexandra SoverellA gentle, no-frills approach to skin health through rest, nourishment, and stopping unnecessary harm.

Skincare approach mentioned

Oil cleanser & Organic Rosehip oil

- ROWSE are my favourites https://rowse.co/

- Caudalie & any pharmacy organic rosehip when on a budget!

Sun protection when needed - La rosé https://www.larosee-cosmetiques.com/products/lait-solaire-spf-50

Sleep, space, and simplicity - by you 💛

Four Tendencies Framework (Gretchen Rubin)To understand motivation styles and build supportive accountability.

https://gretchenrubin.com/quiz/the-four-tendencies-quiz/

Love Languages quizShared inside The Joy Studio community.

https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language

✦ Invitations for reflection

As you listen, you might want to sit with these questions:

Where am I trying to force growth instead of allowing unfurling?

What harm could I interrupt — today — simply by changing my words?

Where could I slow down so much I become… a walrus?

What might naturally regenerate if I stopped interfering?

NEXT STEPS:

This work — the slowing, the unfurling, the interrupting of harm — isn’t something I do alone.

It’s something I practise inside containers that make it safer to pause, listen, and choose differently.

If you’re feeling the pull to explore this alongside others, The Joy Studio is where these conversations continue — gently, honestly, and without pressure to perform.

If you’re craving deeper, more personal support, I may have space for 1:1 coaching early next year. Even filling in the application can be a powerful act of self-listening.

And if what your body wants is space — real space, held space — we’re gathering for Bloom, a countryside retreat in March.

All the details are below. Trust what resonates. Leave the rest.

Join The Joy StudioA community for people practising deep selfish joy, slowness, and self-trust in real life.→ https://thejoystudio.substack.com/

Apply for 1:1 CoachingI have very limited spaces opening in January / February. If it’s for you, you’ll feel it.→ https://emmalavelle.co/

Bloom Retreat — MarchA held pause in the countryside to rest, reflect, and unfurl what’s next.→ https://emmalavelleco.notion.site/Bloom-A-Joy-Restoration-Experience-27d1e39629f480a79732ed17444742c5

And if you’d like a physical postcard from me in 2026, reply to the email with your address — I’d love to write to you!

Emma

“I’m listening” becomes a daily practice — a refusal to rush yourself, a decision to prioritise spaciousness, and a quiet rebellion against the pressure to be endlessly efficient.This is where ambition becomes joyful instead of draining.

I break down how I create space for defiant inefficiency in my own life, how it sharpens my intuition, and why your best ideas only show up when you stop forcing yourself into productivity mode.

If you’ve been feeling stretched thin or disconnected from what you actually want, this episode brings you back to yourself fast.

Mentions:• Haya At @Malaia_Studio

Where to go next:• Community — Join The Joy Studio (December’s “Pause” Advent Calendar is free to start)• 1:1 Coaching — If you’re ready for deeper support, apply for private coaching, The Deep Selfish Joy Journey — Explore the full path on my website• Retreat — Spring retreat spots are open

I share my story of moving to France during the pandemic, renovating a cottage with no money, no internet, and a relationship ending. The plan? It almost broke me. The decisions? They gave me clarity, momentum, and the life I wanted.

Decisions create action and data. Plans create procrastination and stress. One decision leads to the next, and little by little, you build your dream life muscle.

Your next step:Take one decision today. Book a 45-minute Dream Life Vision Session with me. We’ll strip away the “shoulds,” remove limitations, and define your dream project—complete with a name that makes it real.

* Hit reply with DREAM

* Or schedule here: Book Your Dream Life Vision Session

Dream. Decide. Do.

Build your dream life.

Emma x

It will change how you approach everything in life.

It will change how you experience and evaluate everything in life.

It will unlock joy. Even in grief, even in struggle.

And so when you’re in the moments that life brings you pure joy without the grief and struggle?

You’ll experience that 100x more too! That’s where things get really fun.

If you’re ready to make today the day you decided to commit to your version of Project Croissant - maybe the dream of moving to Paris, of launching your Substack, then celebrating it with your writing club, of making mornings alarm free, deliciously lazy and slow coffee whilst listening to the sounds of French floating across the street.

Or maybe the dream of making money from your creative passions, buying the ceramic studio you love to be a client in and taking the train from your house in the countryside each morning to get the magic of both worlds?

It starts with saying it out loud.

To someone who is as excited as you and has done it themselves and helps others to do this every day.

📆 Schedule a free call to talk about your vision for the future from feeling enough, I can share what that would look like with the Joy Studio or 1:1 coaching as part of your toolkit!

You’re already your past selfs dream, you’re doing things right now as standard that felt impossible to your past self, the more we pause to recognise those things, the more we build our self-trust in our capacity to do the next things we decide to prioritise!

A few I always think about are

* Driving confidently

* Driving confidently in France and Spain AND The UK, I just switch, no drama!

* Being in a loving relationship with shared goals

* Working as a life coach

* Having a healthy strong dog

* My friendships and network in Toulouse

* My health - I’m strong! Being healthy is so easy, this is as someone who smoked and partied pretty hard in her twenties and struggled massively with self-esteem.

* Boundaries. I love them, I’m amazing at them and haven’t described myself as a people pleaser for years!

Share a few of yours in the comments!

And if you like this tool and you’re ready to take the next step?

Join The Joy Studio For The Full Toolkit & Coaching, from 197€ a month

What Is The Joy Studio?

The Joy Studio is where you come to swap being woken up in the dark already feeling overwhelmed for slow and stress free mornings, writing your ‘want to do list’ with pen and paper having coffee in the sunshine (and actually get your work done in time for yoga & friends at the end of the day)

It’s where you make the mammoth task of starting a new life in another country into a fun Project with a codename (Croissant) and kickstart your Instagram account sharing the journey on the way.

Joy Studio is where the only competition is who has the best sunrise dog walk photo to share before starting the day

It’s where you see an ‘I have a crazy idea’ message and then the beaming smile 3 months later as they buy the ceramics studio that had been their ‘me time’ calm in the chaos of life in a new city - before learning French.

It’s the space to share how you extended your holiday in Japan for another week so you could keep exploring while working in Tokyo cafes because why not

And where you turn a decision to reconnect with your self-care and mental health into a weekly yoga and brunch club that supports others.

It’s where you let go of the client who was draining you and joyfully slot in your new project of painting wildlife, then share it with your community before you’re ready and the sales come in.

It’s where choosing slow mornings before work flows into creating a writing circle in Paris to write your book with others who want connection (and coffee) not just accountability.

The Joy Studio is where ‘organising your calendar’ means a section for daily Joy Drops like reading in the garden, phone free ice-cream time after school with your daughter, and scheduling them first, guilt free.

It’s where you reconnect to your childhood joys and bump the 5pm ‘optional’ meeting for horse riding in nature

It’s the sanctuary where you turn habits into rituals, and create time for yourself each and every day, it’s where joy is a success strategy.

Ready to add your Joy Story? Join us!

How The Joy Studio Works:

* Private Podcast & Journal Prompts (like today’s)

* WhatsApp Community to drop your questions into and get unstuck

* Bi-monthly recorded coaching calls for deeper dives

Get started from 197€ a month

You BelongYour spot is waitingEmma x

There are three core themes I’ve pulled out here

* Past Failure Paralysis

* Invisible Rules

* External Validation Drive

The quiz my client mentions is The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin, we’ll be diving into how to use it to build success and interrupt unhelpful patterns in the lessons going live this week.

To join us in The Joy Journey Live - I’m sharing daily private podcast episodes between now and NYE plus coaching on them in our WhatsApp group - click here.

And of course once you’ve done the quiz, share your result in the conversation below! I’m obviously 100% a Questioner who leans rebel on occasion 😆

Least of all because, it doesn’t really work, it’s an idea that keeps you constantly stretching because the goal post on your best just keep moving.

Instead, I practise the powerfully simple (but not easy) art of being yourself.

Think taking off heavy clothes that never fit instead of needing to hand sew a couture garment each time you want to go outside.

Lightness. You get to actually stop the struggling and thrashing around and instead think about being - like floating in water when you let go of the side.

I’ll share three key concepts

1. The energy cost of trying to be 'your best self' and how that means starting from not enough

2. Imagining a life where you prioritise mastering being yourself and how that changes everything.

3. Why we don't ‘just be ourselves’

Then I’ll give you three practical steps to get started that I share with my coaching clients and Joy Studio community

What are your thoughts about the concept of ‘your best self’ vs being yourself, have you had any experiences with either?

Would love to know what stops you being yourself and what contexts, or how you’ve overcome them!

P.S.

And lots of you have been asking me if I have 1:1 spaces available, and the answer is YES.

📆 Click here to fill in the application and book a call, just going through the questions and giving yourself space to explore them is a life changing exercise!

with a CTA to book a call to talk about 1:1 coaching

Watch the full conversation above. If “be humble” has been muting your sales (including selling yourself on your skills), this will help.

What you’ll learn:

• A values-led script for making the ask

• Pricing seasonless work without discount-reflex

• Moving beyond Law of Jante / Tall Poppy conditioning

Links:

• Emelie:

Instagram @mlibysvensson

Website - and lookbook! mlibysvensson.com

• Join The Joy Studio: emmalavelle.co/the-joy-studio