Last week, I watched a group of brilliant developers sip sugar water laced with chia seeds—and call it healthy.

This is what happens when we outsource health to buzzwords.

“Is it good for you?” is the wrong question.

If you haven’t mastered vegetables, water, protein, sleep, and movement—you’re not ready for chia seeds.

Forget hacks. Build your Boring Edge.

Then watch how little the noise matters.

Here’s the link to the full post.

I used AI to generate the snippet. I didn’t want to edit/modify it - I just plugged my draft in and asked it for a snippet. Useful. Quick. Gets the job done.

If you haven’t already, please subscribe to my other Substack - where the link goes.

Your glutes didn't fire properly during that deadlift.You didn’t go as heavy as you’d liked.

You were leaning back on the swing.Your hip snap was not as good as it could’ve been.

You huffed and puffed your way around the streets for 30 minutes. You barely ran 4 kilometres. You feel gassed out.You were once running 10k in under an hour and could’ve run 10k more.

That's just data.But how you relate to that data determines whether it builds you up or tears you down.

Are you going to criticise yourself?

Are you going to keep beating yourself up?

What’s your self-talk like? How do you recognise the information that’s being shared with you?

Here's how to transform any piece of information from destructive to constructive:

Step 1: Recognise the Information is Neutral

Stop treating feedback like a verdict on your character.

Your rep wasn't perfect?That's information, not identity.

Your boss wants you to improve something?That's data, not damnation.

The facts are just facts—they carry no emotional weight until you assign it.

And c’mon, AI does not own em dashes. Humans can use them too!!!!

An em dash (—) is a punctuation mark used to create a strong break in a sentence, often replacing commas, parentheses, or colons. It can emphasize information, indicate interruptions, or set off parenthetical elements without the need for additional punctuation.

Step 2: Choose Your Relationship

You get to decide what the information means.

Relationship 1 turns every piece of feedback into evidence that you're failing.

Relationship 2 turns the same feedback into intel for getting better.

Same information. Different lens. Different outcome.

Step 3: Practice the Reframe in Real Time

When you hear* "you forgot to squeeze your glutes," pause.

Don't let your mind jump to "I'm sloppy." Instead, think "cool, let's try 7/10 next set."

When someone says "your presentation needs work," don't spiral into "I'm bad at this." Try "good intel for next time."

* from your own voice inside the head or your coach (although a coach would use better cues but let’s ignore that.)

Why This Changes Everything

First, it removes the emotional sting. Information stops feeling like an attack when you stop taking it personally. The same feedback that used to ruin your day becomes neutral data you can actually use.

Second, it makes you coachable. People who relate to feedback as information improve faster than people who relate to it as judgment. You become someone who can hear hard truths without breaking.

Third, it builds resilience everywhere. The gym is just practice. When you can hear "Your hinge can be deeper. And oh, squeeze those glutes" as coaching instead of criticism, you can hear "your relationship needs work" the same way. Or "your project missed the mark." Or any other difficult truth.

Your next piece of feedback is coming whether you want it or not.

The information will be what it is.

But your relationship to it?

That's entirely up to you.

But someone said I'd run a half marathon in a few months.

So I showed up. Again and again. And they were right.

The First Step Is Rarely Clear

When I joined a running group, I wasn't a runner.

Not even close.

But the group didn't treat me like I was broken.

They simply said: *"Show up. Four times a week. Trust the process."*

It was the first time I saw how powerful a clear system can be.

Simple Systems WorkIf Life Lets You Use Them

Every week, I ran a little farther.

Each long run was a new personal best.

And with every new distance, I realized:

My limits weren't real. They were just thoughts.

But here's the twist: not everyone can show up four days a week.

Some have toddlers. Aging parents. Invisible battles.

Life doesn't care about your perfect plan.

A perfect plan means nothing if it doesn't fit your life.

It's Not One System vs Another

We've built something at The Quad. It works for many people.

But not everyone.

And that's okay.

A good system + the right timing + a little guidance = momentum.

But take away any one of those, and even the best plan can fail.

That's not your fault.

That's not the system's fault.

That's just a sign that you need a different entry point.

Your Job: Do. Reflect. Adapt.

Try something.

Notice what sticks.

Notice what you resist.

Adapt.

Stop looking for the final answer. Take the next step.

You're the expert on you.

And I'm the coach who helps you explore the map.

That's what I love most.

Not handing you a blueprint-but walking with you while you test, tweak, and make it your own.

Don't Quit the Tool. Change the Timing.

Maybe you tried something and it didn't work.

That doesn't mean the tool is broken.

It means: not right now.

When you're ready, pick it up again.

Tools don't judge.

You got this.

The Daily Grind: Working to Pay Off Your Home

To make these monthly payments, you go to work, clocking in 40-hour (or sometimes 70-hour) weeks, and dedicate a portion of your earnings to your home loan. For the next 20 years, this is the drill. You can't skip work or miss a monthly payment. It's a daily, weekly, and monthly effort with no shortcuts.

Parallel Paths: Investing in Your Health

Now, let's contrast this with your health.

To stay healthy and have a youthful body and mind 20 years from now, there are many similarities. You need to make a consistent effort daily, weekly, and monthly. Unlike the house, you don't need to make a full payment upfront or even a down payment. If you invest in your health consistently over the next 20 years, you'll have the body of your dreams.

The Key Difference: Instant vs. Delayed Gratification

Here's where the difference lies: With the house, you get instant gratification. You get the house immediately.

With your body, gratification is delayed. You see the results as you do the work, building your health brick by brick.

Consistent Effort: The Path to Success

In both scenarios, you commit to a long-term effort. For the home, you pay interest. For the body, there's no interest—in fact, it gets easier. As you put in the effort early on, your body works better, and it costs less to maintain and improve it. As your habits change, it becomes easier to continue the effort.

The Power of Small, Consistent Actions: An Anecdote

Yet, the home scenario makes sense to us, while the body scenario often does not.

Let's illustrate this with an anecdote:

Morgan Housel, in his book "The Psychology of Money," shares a story about a janitor named Ronald Read. Ronald lived a simple life, driving an old car and wearing flannel shirts. He worked diligently, saved consistently, and invested wisely. By the time he passed away, he had amassed an $8 million fortune, which he left to his local library and hospital. Ronald's wealth wasn't built on a single big investment but through decades of small, consistent efforts. Just like Ronald’s financial habits, your health can be built up through small, consistent actions over time.

The Truth About Aging: It's Up to You

Don’t buy into the lie that ageing means living in a deteriorating body. Ageing is inevitable; having an unhealthy, incapacitated body is not.

Taking Action: Start Today

Do the work. Brick by brick. Daily. Weekly. Monthly. Put in the effort.

Just as a part of your monthly income goes towards your home loan, a part of your day should go towards your long-term health. Go to the gym, eat vegetables and protein, and sleep 7+ hours.

Your True Home

Your true home is your mind and body. Invest in it.

Start today.

the ability to take on another's perspective, to understand, feel, and possibly share and respond to their experience

Is it possible to be empathetic? To understand and feel what they are feeling? In any field of play, empathy is touted as a master quality. If you can put yourself into another's shoes, then you will be able to write about their conditions better. Design a product that is tailored for them. Connect with them better and so on. Makes sense.

But is this true? What are the limits of it?

An Immense World

I recently read Ed Yong's brilliant book, An Immense World. In it, Yong explores various senses and stimuli that are not ours. And powered by the lens of not being biased by our own senses. Or to quote the American philosopher Thomas Nagel

I want to know what it is like for a bat to be a bat. Yet if I try to imagine this, I am restricted to the resources of my own mind, and those resources are inadequate to the task.

What he means is our lens and point of view is ours. We will look at what it feels like to be a bat by fitting in a bat's echolocation skills on top of being a human. See Daredevil, for example. But that's not how it feels to be a bat. That's echolocation extrapolated on top of human-ness.

And what does this have to do with empathy?!

Well. While humans all share the same sense stimuli i.e. listening to music and what it does to you, I can understand it because I go through something similar. Or when we see a rainbow - sure, my blue might be subtly different from your blue. Or if you are colour-blind, you are seeing something different. But we are both seeing a fascinating phenomenon of colour.

And on to the thought that spurred. This is not about your blue being different from my blue.

Certain aspects are seen/felt at a different level, based on your skills. For example, my wife is a talented musician. This means how she hears and understands music, what's going on in a song - not what I hear. She groks the why behind certain decisions, the skills, the subtleties and thus her appreciation for it is different from mine. I either like it or I don't and I am hard-pressed to explain or elaborate.

To complicate things further, depending on your mood, a rainbow might look beautiful and leave you with a sense of awe. Or you might be preoccupied with something else and not even be aware that there's a rainbow.

So, for me to empathise with you in a situation is pretty complicated. There's the larger sphere of things that is your world, your filters, your lenses. Where you grew up, what your parents and peers believed in and influenced you into thinking, what events shaped you and all that. And then there are the more immediate ones. Did you get a warning from your doctor about your blood work? This means you are going to be a lot more serious about finding a solution for your health and fitness. Or did you have a fight with your partner, which means you are not going to be receptive to an amazing idea that might be passing in front of you?

Grad School

It is possible and necessary to take on another's perspective. That is the only way one can stop designing for themselves and actually design for the other person. But this is a tool, an abstraction. It is important not to take it as fact. This is why interviewing people, and talking to diverse sets of individuals and groups to build up one's knowledge and abstractions of the world is very useful. The more models we have, the better.

Combining your domain expertise with the other person's perspective - that's what we do when we say we empathise. And it is a much harder exercise than I previously believed.

Now, of course, there's a significant amount of overthinking happening on my part. In grad school, one of my projects in my second semester was to design an experience for a visitor to a park. Please note a park in the USA refers to a national park - acres and acres of natural habitat. Think Yellowstone and not your neighbourhood park with slides and swings.

Our group explored this question differently. We wanted to understand how any differently-abled person would go see the park. We simulated a few different experiences - what does it feel like for a visually impaired person? What does a person in a wheelchair experience? And what about someone who is not able to relax and immerse themselves in the experience because of whatever reasons?

One of us was blindfolded and we spent the rest of the afternoon going through our routine. We discussed the project. We went to Yogi's for lunch - the wait staff were used to weird experiments on a college campus. We took a crude snapshot of what the world feels like to a visually impaired person. One of us was taken to the top of a tall tower with a beautiful view. With an irrational fear of heights, what does the serenity and beauty of the situation feel like to this person versus someone who is not impaired by that? Essentially, can we put ourselves in another person's lens to understand the distortion of what we think is normal.

It was an interesting exploration and expanded how I thought about the world. And our line of thinking and exploration of the question impressed our professor quite a bit. Not only were we awarded the best project that year, but we were informed by him that it was the best thinking he had seen exhibited in his class in all his years as a teacher. It felt wonderful to hear, even though in later years, I thought it was a bit of hyperbole. Fast forward to 12 years later, in 2019, when I visited my school and I dropped into this professor's office without warning. Not only did he recognise me in 10 seconds, but he said me and my group were impossible to forget because of the aforementioned project - something he still references in his classes to this day.

What next?

It is impossible to put ourselves in our pet's head. It is impossible to put ourselves in our friend's head too but it is possible to get a lot closer. In both scenarios.

On a walk, my dog wants to explore smells. There are fascinating (disgusting to me) stories that she's smelling. Just because her way of doing things (smelling pee all over, sniffing her friends' butts) is weird does not mean it is wrong.

Likewise, my customer's framing might be weird. My wife's reaction to an event might be different than mine. Taking the time to explore the why, to get into their shoes - as limited as it might be - is a wonderful and powerful tool.

Yes, it is limited. But not doing that is so much more limited.

You want to know what it feels like for them to be them. And in this situation.

Not what it feels like for you if you were in their shoes.

Going back to my grad school project, whenever I feel I've lost touch in connecting with someone in a situation, has been a powerful trigger for me. Spending the time pondering this "What does it feel like for you to be you in this situation" is the best way to spend time understanding a problem better.

Empathy is important. It is vital to communicate. To connect. To sell. To create.

Your turn

I'd like to hear your thoughts on this topic. What methods do you use to empathise? What do you get wrong? What do you get right?

From Wikipedia,

A state characterized by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli despite adverse consequences

and

characterized by a persistent and intense urge to use a drug or engage in a behaviour that produces natural reward, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences

... perpetuating cravings. weakens self-control.

I don't know about you but I have a few addictions. And I'd like to discuss a couple of them.

Football

In my teens, when I was looking for a tribe to belong to, I discovered football. I used to watch every sport on TV, including golf and curling (sober cornhole, played on ice. What's not to like?)

And I got hooked one day after watching a wondergoal.

I started watching ManUtd obsessively. I've always enjoyed sports and there was something deep that following this team filled me. For the better part of 20 years, they've been a cornerstone of my life.

I'd decline dinner invitations and dates if there was a game on. I'd wake up at midnight to watch the Champions League midweek. While living in California, I'd drive to an English pub at 4 am to watch the games. It was fun. It was the best.

But over the pandemic, I had the time to re-assess quite a lot. And one addiction that I detested was being hooked on to football news. Every time I was stuck on something, I'd find myself opening 5 new browser tabs and rapidly typing 5 different football websites.

And I would do this every 30 minutes. All day. Every day. And I'd been doing this for years and years. I realised that this was an addiction that I needed to work on.

Watching football is one thing (and there's a much longer post related to that) but checking football news is silly. Every time there was a new article, I'd get a reward. Distracting myself, losing focus on work or the task at hand, being out of control, and having itchy fingers any time I had a few minutes to spare.

This is one addiction I've overcome. It's taken the better part of 3 years. But from checking football sites (five) multiple times a day, I've brought it down to two sites for a maximum of once a day. And there are days when I don't check it too.

Books

The amount of books on my shelves keeps increasing. Quite a bit of them are books that I want to read but have not yet. The only thing faster than the "unread" on my shelves is my wishlist on GoodReads.

I am privileged to spend a substantial amount on books. And I exercise that privilege every month. Sometimes multiple times a month. I approximate 5-8 new books a month (this does not include fiction). I don't read anywhere that fast. In fact, only of late, I've realised my note-taking and re-reading skills need work and so I've slowed down even further.

But I am addicted to books.

I cannot stop buying them. The only social network I spend time on, by choice, is GoodReads.

And guess what - it is a new month and it is time to buy a few more books on my wishlist.

I see two potential issues with this addiction of mine. One is money i.e. this can add up. But as I said, I am privileged enough to be able to buy a bunch of books every month and it does not hurt my wallet. The second is "Oh my god, there's so much to read. there's so much you don't know. and you haven't read this and this and this and this and this. and yet you are buying more..." - well, mental. Self-criticism was the harmful part of this addiction and something I am working to remove, and successful at that. Without it, this addiction of mine seems positive.

It is taking quite a bit of energy to stop editing this and head over to GoodReads and then wander off to buy 5 books. But that would be a negative consequence that I'd not want to be a part of this addiction. Stay strong!

This is an addiction I have reduced the negative consequences of and embraced the addiction.

Sugar

Most of you might think this is the only legitimate addiction. It is not true - the above two examples (not my only addictions, mind) are and can be pretty debilitating.

From when I was young, if I didn't eat a particular food, adding sugar was the only way to make me eat it. Dosai with sambar was not enough - I'd add sugar to the sambar. I'd add sugar to the molaga podi. Suffice it to say, I'd add sugar to everything.

Fast forward to today, and I have crafted quite a few rules to keep a handle on my sugar addiction. For example, don't start the day with sugar. Particularly hard if you are surrounded by great bakeries and pastries. Or when your colleague brings in amazing home-baked chocolate cake. Another rule I have is to keep my sugar intake to the weekends.

These have helped curtail a rather severe obsession with sugar.

There was this time when my wife and I returned from Calcutta. I was armed with baked rasagullas made with nolengur. There are about 15 of these in a box and we were supposed to take the box to share with our colleagues at work. Unfortunately, that day, we forgot. Come evening, I had a face-off with the rasagullas. And over the next 2 hours, I proceeded to eat the entire box. My wife, who's seen me pull off substantial feats of sugar consumption, was shellshocked. She said I had hit a new level that day. An unwanted PR :)

Which is why I have my rules about my sugar consumption. Because there are a few times when I am eating it even though I don't want it. That's the next step for me. I am okay if I eat an entire box of sweets, as long as I want it. But if my cravings are over, I need to stop the addictive tendency to keep stuffing my face.

This is an addiction that I am 51% in control of, and have a long way to go.

Your turn

What behaviour(s) are you addicted to?

Where are they causing you serious negative harm?

What rules and guidelines do you need to put guard rails around them?

What addictions do you want to keep?

What addictions do you want to remove?

I'd love it if you'd like to share.

Okay, and now, I am off to buy some books.

The road to robustification starts with a modicum of harm– Nassim Taleb

You are innately familiar with this concept. You got vaccinated as a kid against a bunch of diseases. What goes in a vaccine? Well, a bit of the infection which the body can overwhelm. And thus build an immune response.

You stress the body. The body responds by getting stronger. The body responds by owning that stress.

You fall sick when the infection overwhelms you. When the dose is too high.

But a small dose, the right dosage, of a harmful substance is beneficial for the organism.

Goldilocks

Too small a dose and nothing happens.

Too big a dose and bad things happen.

The same principle applies, amongst other things, to how physical exercise works on the body (and mind.)

You provide your body with a modicum of harm. You provide an external stressor that the body is not used to.

For example, you squat 10 kilos. You do, throughout your workout, 50 squats. The next day, your body is quite sore. You might find it hard to walk upstairs. Your quadriceps (the front of your thigh) are screaming.

Fast forward a few months of regular physical training. You are squatting 50 kilos for 50 reps in your workouts. And your soreness is less than what it was after the first day. Isn't that crazy?!

By regularly dosing a modicum of harm, by adding a bit more stress than what your body was used to, your body gets stronger.

This is the overarching principle behind physical fitness.

To get stronger, lift more weights.

To increase your endurance, do more work.

To increase your flexibility, stretch.

But beyond the obvious and ultimately useless statements above, you add the principle you learned. The same principle of vaccination.

Find the right dose. Get stronger. Repeat.

Complication

A couple of complications arise.

The dosage is a combination of intensity, repetition, and frequency. Do too much or too little, and you have a problem.

Too much is harmful.

Too little is useless.

Walking, for example, is the most accessible form of physical activity for most people. Unfortunately, most people have too low a dosage for it to create a physiological impact. That is, it doesn't produce positive adaptations in your body and physical health.

This applies to any physical activity. Even if it is hard. Running a 5k might sound hard. But if you run 5k multiple times a week, your body has adapted to it and doesn't get too much from it. Not as much as you'd like to keep improving it, let me clarify.

Methods to Increase Dosage

So, what do you do?

You have a few options.

Increase the volume of work done. If you are walking, increase the distance every week. Your body adapts. And then you increase the dose. So, the benefits will continue to flow.

Soon enough though, you will run into a problem of time. So, walk faster. Aim to cover more distance in the same amount of time. If you start by walking 3 km in an hour, over many weeks, you can get rather fast and aim for up to 7k (!!!).

But there will be a ceiling for this as well. We've increased the time to an hour. Let's say that's the maximum time we have. We've increased speed in that hour. So, that leaves increasing the difficulty level. If you are walking on a treadmill, you can add an incline to it. If you are walking outside (much better than walking on a treadmill), you can wear a weighted vest.

This will keep your body challenged for many many weeks. Producing improvements consistently.

This principle applies in strength training - which is why we increase the load, or change the levers, or change the movement and make it harder. Think wall pushups to floor pushups to handstand pushups.

Likewise, it applies to endurance training as well. Especially because a linear increase in training time is not compatible with everyone's life.

What next?

So, where do you go from here?

Where are you stalling?

Weight loss or weight gain not happening? Strength not improving?

Or let's expand to life. Where in life are you stalling? Where have you stopped growing?

In what aspects of your life have you stopped increasing the dosage?

Where have you kept on doing the same dose? You've stopped learning. You've stopped growing there.

To improve, to get better, to continue on your awesome journey, increase the dose.

Remember, not too much. But not too little.

And then, change it up. Do something else.

And then come back to the original.

I'd love to know what aspect of your life you are going to work on.

We all kinda sorta know of the obviously harmful. For example, we know smoking cigarettes is terrible for health. Right? No one is smoking under the impression that it is a net positive.

We also have a few things that are harmful but not immediately. And (my opinion) the effects are filtered down invisibly, the tentacles reaching out into the physical, mental, and psychological that it is hard to know their effects. For example, eating processed foods and sugar. Let's caveat that with "beyond a certain amount and frequency" to make that fact palatable.

And then we have things that are deemed not harmful. Or are harmful but we don't know that they are. As Nassim Taleb reminded me multiple times recently (while reading AntiFragile), absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. For example, the amount of time we spend with a mobile phone next to us or 5G or being bombarded by some form of Wi-Fi.

Naive / Cynical

Earlier in the week, I was chatting with a friend of mine. We were debating the "harmful" effects of products and things in our world. My friend's opinion was if something is harmful, especially something pervasive, it would be reported and removed.

This is not about a specific product. But for the sake of argument, let's say it was about toothpaste. But it can be extended to a lot of things - the stock market crash of 2008, freeing Iraq, or lead in pipes.

Toothpaste

The complication is we "need" toothpaste. We use it daily. How can toothpaste be harmful? How can that harm go undetected? It's not possible.

Let's rewind.

100 years ago, smoking was promoted as something healthy. The famous Camels ad promoted the cigarette as something doctors smoked. Today, it is known that cigarettes are the worst health hazard there is. If cigarettes did not exist, more lives would've been saved than any other man-made disaster put together. Imagine that - all our wars combined!

Or lead in paint.

It takes years, nay decades, to put a stop to these things. People get silenced, money at the higher levels pushes messaging and products, and short-termism on the part of stakeholders ensures that these are not resolved. Heard of climate change?

Control the controllable

What's the point? Are we doomed? Well, cynicism does not help here. So, what do we do? How does one approach this? If Wi-Fi is harmful, if 5G is harmful - are we going to retreat to a remote hillside, away from civilisation?

Or are we going to put our hands up and say it is too big to fight? We need our toothpaste, we need our Wi-Fi.

Well, I don't have an answer.

These are the kinds of things that keep me up. For now, I retain my sanity by looking at "what can I control." And I extend it to "what can I teach my community, in terms of their health and fitness."

But there's always a gnawing feeling that it is not enough.

Powerless?

Assuming that people in charge - of the government, of the economy, of the stock market, of pharma etc - have our best interests in mind is, as a general rule, untrue.

But if individually we are unable to make a change, do we continue to remain pawns? Are we powerless?

All of us can fight the good fight in our own way. What that means is up to each of us. Our vote (not the literal vote in the election) on each action is still up to us. Maybe we won't start with toothpaste and Wi-Fi. Or maybe we will.

Discussion

What do you think?

What "harmless" product/service/behaviour do you know to be anything but?

What second and third-order consequences are we missing - that we can start working on?

That's why abstractions are powerful. They provide us with a valuable tool to simplify complex matters. In fact, it is not possible to absorb an event without abstraction. Even what you are seeing now, the eye (and optic nerve and the entire visual cortex) chooses to show you only a part of it. Because it'd be overwhelming and too much.

That's what abstraction entails. How can we compact a large, complicated picture into something simpler and understandable?

It is crucial to remember that the abstraction is and can never be the whole picture.

That's the advantage and the disadvantage.

Let me elaborate with a couple of examples, and then dive a bit more into it in my professional life.

Calories: More than Meets the Eye

Calories in. Calories out. Is weight loss that simple?

Yes. No. Hmm, maybe.

It is a perfect abstraction to begin with. And to use as a North Star. Whenever you see unwanted weight gain, before you overcomplicate stuff, you can start with "Maybe I am eating more calories than is needed."

But beneath the surface, it is complicated. Because the human body is complicated and one we have not fully understood.

There's a macronutrient split, based on what works for you. Some people do well on a low-fat diet, while others do better on a low-carb diet. Should you do moderate protein or high protein?

And then there's the micronutrients we need to get - vitamins and minerals.

This complex stuff gets abstracted into a "diet" - the paleo diet, the keto diet and so on.

But in the end, the magic lies in the balance – eating a tad less than what your body craves. And figuring out how to control your cravings without feeling like you are missing out.

Strength Training: The Enchantment of Overcompensation

Second example.

Your body needs acute (short-term) stress, followed by a period of recovery. When you do that, it responds by overcompensating i.e. it gets ready to handle a wee bit more stress than what you put.

And that's how you get stronger. That's how all physical adaptations - whether it is power or endurance or flexibility or whatever work.

Lift a bit more load than what you did in the previous training session. Repeat. And you get stronger. A simple abstraction for strength training.

Or to generalise, do a bit more "work" than you did last time around. Run a bit more. Run a bit faster.

As you specialise, as you get better, you need to zoom in more. You dive into more complicated abstractions. For example, do a 400m repeat at a specific pace and rest for 2 minutes. Do 8 reps of this. And next week, do 9. Then, 10. Then, switch to 800m repeats.

Again, what's happening is an understanding of the complex machinery, processes, and adaptations into a protocol.

And it all comes down to the basic principle of "the right amount of stress" followed by recovery.

Do too much and/or too often, and you get injured.

Do too little and/or not often enough, and you don't see progress.

Data and using it to run an organisation

At The Quad, we collect and analyse a lot of our student data. How often do they come to class? How and when do they miss class? What results do they see? What weights and progress do they make?

And zooming out - what's the Lifetime Customer Value? What's the Length of Engagement? What's the retention rate?

All of this data (and then some) is one part of the picture. Where humans are involved, emotions and feelings are involved. One cannot encapsulate each individual's life and what's happening there (which causes them to miss a class) into attendance data. One cannot understand motivation and community in this data.

And yet, the data plays an important role.

One of the other parts is speaking with the student. The data provides an abstraction for the entire group or cohorts. Zooming into the individual, listening to them, understanding their stories and emotions and feelings helps us at The Quad break out of the abstraction and to fill in the gaps.

If we went by one (either one), we'd make big mistakes.

If a few of our vocal students felt the workouts were boring, a knee-jerk reaction would be to say "A lot of students find the sessions boring." But the data will tell us better.

Likewise, if attendance drops we assume something's wrong. But it is just the school term ending and a lot of folks are on vacation this week with their families.

The map is not the territory.

The Power of Abstraction

Abstractions are like the guiding stars in our journey through the forest of life. They offer us a simplified map, but the maze (nay, forest) remains vast and mysterious. Remember, it's like being a brave explorer, using the map but forging your own path.

In the world of data, acknowledge that it's one part of the puzzle. You must seek other clues, like conversing with your customers and watching for market trends.

And in the realm of fitness and nutrition, be a scientist in the forest, experimenting, observing, and iterating. Abstractions are your compass, but the adventure is uniquely yours. Life's labyrinth is full of wonders and challenges, and it's through the lens of abstraction that we can find our way, like a map leading us through a mystical forest.

Discussion: What abstractions do you find central in your life? What advantages do they offer? What disadvantages do you know and prepare for?

I've found three incredibly effective habits to make positivity my second nature. This road to self-improvement may not always be smooth, but it’s a journey which promises personal growth and mindful existence - far beyond the fleeting comfort of a well-timed joke.

While these guidelines/habits might not be relevant for you, I hope that this will spark something in you. Not immediately but when it happens. Write it down immediately.

#1: Stop trying to be funny.

If you are not one of those warm and funny people, stop trying to be funny.

I am not warm and funny. I have a dry and sarcastic bent which humours me more than the other person.

What I've learned is while it is fine to indulge in my sense of humour, I (used to) attempt to be funny too often in social conversations. And given a poor hit/miss ratio, I'd end up saying stupid things more often than I'd like.

Instead of brushing up on jokes, I've instead stopped trying to be funny, to have a quip. I think people like me better now :)

#2: If you cannot say anything positive, don't say anything.

Absolute cliche but true.

Do you need to point out if someone's looking haggard? Or if they've put on weight? Nope. You can shut it.

I (used to) not find anything positive as I was busy telling myself about #1 and #2. But this one's simpler except if you are an over-thinker like I am.

Most often, I am pleased to see the other person. Telling them that is positive enough.

#3: Check in with yourself.

This is the most recent learning and one I have the least number of practices with.

Are you feeling stressed? Are you feeling grumpy? Tired? Hungry? Thirsty?

Especially in social settings, I tend to shrink if I am low on energy. But it happens even when I am alone, to be honest. I find myself being a bigger dick to myself when I am feeling low.

Being aware by checking in with myself is simple. Just by paying attention and asking the question, I realise I am being kind to myself. And I might not be able to do much about it (although there are things that can be done.)

But checking in, and acknowledging that I am feeling grumpy is quite often enough to get out of my grumpy zone.

This list keeps growing. And there's a lot of contradictory stuff as I pen them down. But that's okay.

More than anything, I realise that guidelines and heuristics help me navigate the world better. Like you, I have a lot of these. Penning them down and elaborating on them has been useful. Too many unsaid things leave me on autopilot and without a clear idea of why something happened.

Name it. Write it down. It solidifies.

The thing with self-help is you have to figure out what works for you and what applies to you. That sounds rough but it is a lot of fun.

In the fitness world, we often find ourselves chasing after the next big trend. The media and so-called experts feed us what we crave, what sells. Instead of providing the insight we desperately need.

Method after method is proclaimed as the Holy Grail.The one ring to rule them all.What you've been searching for.Behind this door lies salvation.

They tell you you need to do a few things. Learn a few skills and apply them. And the results are guaranteed.

In my experience, this does not happen often.

And when it does, it happens because a few other factors fell in place - not because the method is superior.

Inevitably, you fail.

You blame yourself.

But you didn't fail.

The method failed.

Because you needed something beyond a method.

But you don't want to hear the deeper answer.

And because you are impatient to listen, because you want your short-term results, the folks selling things to you conform to what sells.

They seem to win.You lose.

I don't think it is about methods.

It is not about learning certain skills.

Your skill gap is not the reason you are not reaching your fitness and health goals.

Learning to run better or lift kettlebells is not what is stopping you.

The Lure of the 'Perfect' Method

The moment a fitness trend gains momentum, it becomes the talk of the town. Everyone starts replicating it, either lauding its perfection or criticising its shortcomings while promoting their own 'fix-all' solutions. This black-and-white approach is misleading, creating an illusion that there is a single answer to our fitness woes.

The more FOR or AGAINST you are, the more attention you garner.

Moderate opinions are discarded because, well, they are moderate.

The Media's Role in Perpetuating Fitness Myths

The media thrives on sensationalism, often amplifying claims to attract and retain audiences. This tendency towards hyperbole is especially prevalent in the fitness industry, where exaggerated promises are the norm rather than the exception.

Piggybacking on a huge result - "See how this 150 kg guy lost 50 kilos in 5 months by just doing this ONE thing." kinda nonsense. Really?!

Challenging the Hyperbole

We need to challenge this culture of hyperbole and understand that fitness is not a destination, but a journey. There is no 'perfect' method that will solve all our problems. Instead, it's about a process of discovery.

It is not about cramming for an exam.

It is not about learning a few skills.

It goes deeper than that.

You need to work on your foundation. On your core. And no, I don't mean crunches.

The Pitfalls of Self-Help Methodologies

Self-help methodologies often focus on the difficulty of the task at hand, reinforcing the idea that fitness is hard work and that failure is a personal flaw. This can lead to a cycle of self-blame and a lack of progress.

When you stumble, it's not you who has failed. The methodology has let you down.

In our quest for the 'perfect' method, we often shift from one trend to another, blaming ourselves when we don't see immediate results. This pattern of shifting allegiances is counterproductive and often leaves us feeling defeated.

Your relationship with your body

Beyond the hype of the 'perfect' method, the real key to fitness lies in finding a deeper alignment.

You need to establish a better relationship with your body.

If you are angry with how your body looks, with how you have let yourself go, with how you were a fat kid, you need to work on that.

While I am StrongFirst Elite, in my head I am the skinny, weak kid who could not last beyond 10 overs in a cricket game. That holds me back. Being unfair to myself, and being angry with myself has not let me celebrate or empathise with how amazing an achievement I have accomplished.

Instead of learning to snatch the 32 kg bell or deadlift 3x my body weight, I need to work on being kinder to myself. On acknowledging my body's awesomeness. On understanding why new skills do not leave behind everlasting goodness.

I need to work on a better relationship with my body.

A lot of us do.

Your relationship with a lot of things

The foundation of true fitness lies in establishing healthier relationships with your body, your diet, your work, and those around you.

The true fundamentals of fitness are about building a better relationship with your body, your food, your work, and your support system.

Your relationship with work-life

The rat race we've been put on from childhood encourages instant gratification. It tells you that scoring marks in exams is what matters. It tells you that promotions and paychecks are the real deal.

You intuitively know that your mind and body are more important. But short-term deprioritisation happens. You look at your elders and see that they are in a sad physical (and mental state.) You tell yourself that it won't happen to you. But it will.

Unless.

The Path to True Fitness

The quest for the 'perfect' method often leads us astray. Instead of focusing on acquiring skills or jumping on a new method, you need to go a different route.

Build a better relationship with your body, and with your past. Is your work life enabling your journey? Do you have a support system in place that encourages and empathises with you?

I know this sounds unnecessarily deep and complex. But that's life.

If it was easy, everyone would do it.

Embrace the journey, and you'll find that the path to true fitness is within your reach.

Note: I know I went missing for 3 weeks. I didn’t know how to give a heads up before the fact. If you missed me, thank you.

If you could do something over, what and how would you go about it?

If I could have a do-over for my fitness journey, how would I go about it?

First, I am StrongFirst Elite.And the founder of a popular fitness company that's grown organically for over a decade.So, I obviously have my stuff together, right?I am constantly at sub 10% body fat.My cholesterol levels are perfect.I have very little left to do.

Ha!

The view from where I started in 2007 is definitely unbelievable.Taking control of my health and fitness has been an incredible journey.

But I am not where I thought I'd be.My blood work looks great but there are a couple of things that could be much better.My body fat percentage varies from pretty good to average. And never near 10%.

The vague "I am going to be super fit" is a lot clearer now.

So, I thought I'd jot down my goals and gaps, imagining writing them down all those many years ago.

* I thought I'd be ache-free and pain-free.

* I thought I would move with a lot more fluidity and grace.

* I thought I'd be at 10% body fat and maintain it rather easily.

* I thought I'd be like a Duracell bunny in any and all workouts.

I agree with all these goals and I think they are perfect for today.

None of the above is a reality.Why not?

Being ache-free and pain-free

I can trace it back to wanting to make gains - lift more weight, lose more fat, run faster and longer - as fast as possible.

When I started lifting barbells, I wanted to squat twice my body weight.

When I joined CrossFit, I wanted to workout with all my might and finish every one of them victorious and wiped out.

And every time I got there, I'd set my sights on a new target.

I kept thinking that as I got stronger, my body would correct itself better.

While I focused on good technique and form, I definitely made compromises - there's a world between good and great.

And the 1000s of reps I did in my earlier days that were barely good are a significant part of my foundation.

Plus, I prioritised stuff I was good at and had fun with, more than the boring stuff. The stuff I needed to do.

I did not spend enough time on recovery work.

I did not spend enough time stretching.

I did not spend enough time on my mental side of things.

Being ache-free and pain-free is goal #1.

Moving with fluidity and grace

This, I think, is an extension of the previous one.

How I move today is beautiful, compared to 16 years ago.

How I move, when I compare it to the impossible ideal, is ...

While that's an unfair comparison, that's what I want.More importantly, that's what I need.To knit my body together.To allow it to express itself better.

Instead of questioning whether that's a rational goal, how about I make that the goal?

16 years ago, if you said I could press half my body weight, I would've questioned your sanity.So, who am I to say that this is an irrational goal?!

Moving with the grace and fluidity of a cat is goal #2.

10% body fat

Fat loss was always the goal, starting off.

That involved a heck of a lot of discipline in the kitchen.

So, I started off with simpler targets - touch my toes, be able to run a bit, create a fitness habit, get strong and so on.

Eventually, I was ready to tackle the impossible dream of fat loss.

And the science worked.The steps worked.

When I needed to get under 60 kilos (from an already lean and strong 64 kg), I did that.While continuing to stay strong - I attended my first StrongFirst certification at a bodyweight of 59.1 kgs to be at a certain weight category.

But anytime I leaned out that much, I lost more strength than I would've liked.And I could never maintain it.

I would chase two rabbits - strength and fat loss - and abandon one soon enough and not make much progress on the other.This continued for years and years.I never bothered to nail it down and maintain it.It was too much work, honestly.

I could not balance my work, my social life, my love for chocolate ice cream and a low body fat percentage and high strength levels.

I shifted to an easier goal of having my waist-to-height ratio under 0.5.

My waist hovers between 80 cm ( height is 164 cm ) and 75 cm.

But far away from ~70 cm, which is where I'd need to get to and have my body fat percentage near the 10% mark.

Why is aesthetics a goal?

Well, two personal reasons.

One, I've not done it before.I've leaned out.Or I've been incredibly strong.I've not done both at the same time.Nor have I made it my new normal.

That makes it an uncomfortable goal to state.Because I don't know if I will succeed.And that's precisely why it makes a great goal.

Two, I need to improve some of my blood markers - my Apolipoprotein-B to be exact.And the one thing I have not done towards it is losing most/all of my non-functional weight.And then calibrating my nutrition further.

So, to be at a lean and strong body fat percentage is goal #3.

This is the most objective and most uncomfortable goal for me.

Duracell bunny

The StrongFirst Elite performance standards are perfect to aim for.

The 10-minute snatch test to replace the 5-minute one (200 snatches in 10 versus 100 snatches in 5) pushes the ante a bit.

Getting back to where I am today (plus a bit more).

That's goal #4.

This is the most fun goal, personally.

And that's why I am keeping this last.

I need to do what I need to do.

Then, I can come to what I want to do.

Begin again

16 years ago, I would not have had the patience to start being ache-free and pain-free.The ideal would've been to do that.Then work on my aerobic base and build that up over a year.And then start with getting coached on my strength for the next year or so.And then getting coached to build an all-round program for the next decade.

Well, on paper, that sounds great.I would've probably quit that program rather quickly.I am happy with the path I took.

I don't want a do-over.Every stupid thing I did taught me something.Every wrong choice I made led to me being a better coach.Every failure was incredibly useful.Every goal I hit was sweeter.

The choice of a do-over is optional.

And I'd like to take that option.

I have the rest of my life to hit every fitness goal I can come up with and entertain myself with.

I have a great opportunity to begin again.

Yes, I have more aches and pains than I did 16 years ago.

But I have a ton more tools in my toolbox.

And more importantly, I know it is possible.

All that's required is patience.

Mastery.

Doing the work.

Keeping the goal the goal.

What's the goal?

16 years ago, I did not know getting incredibly strong was feasible for someone like me. I did not know getting lean was possible for someone with my genetics and 25 years of poor nutrition.

Now, I know otherwise.

Of course, it is going to be hard work, considering I am 16 years older.

But what does my wish list look like?What I spoke about.

To have my body and mind restored with the quickness, agility, grace, and fluidity that all of us had as kids.To be up for anything.To be physically and mentally energetic and wired.Qualitative.Abstract.

But also very very clear in my head.

I don't know how long these are going to take.I don't truly know how to get there.I have some ideas.I have many learnings.But it is not a given.

Now, I need to put them together and find a mentor to guide me through it.

And every time I get distracted by a shiny object, I need to remind myself to keep the goal the goal.

I don't know where I heard/read this.Wisdom is learning to listen to your own advice.

And I've learned a lot and have some solid advice.

Now, to be calm and patient.And do.

Let's embark on a transformative journey together. Learning to not withstand the gusts of failure but harness them. And propelling us forward towards fitness, wellness, and personal growth.

Failure

The very word can be daunting, often seen as an end rather than a beginning. But what if you saw it differently? What if failure was the catalyst for change, the spark to ignite your evolution? Having the courage to fail is not an end, but rather a shifting point that prompts a powerful metamorphosis. An invitation to grow, to reshape, and to take decisive action towards your personal goals.

If you look at various points in your life, you will find key decisions that you took that changed your life for the better. These key decisions were preceded by a low point. Self-reflection and personal change were pointed out to you by a failure. After a period of self-loathing and self-flagellation, you took action.

Many of your brightest points are connected to your biggest failures.

By embracing failure, you redefine your path. You allow yourself to acknowledge your flaws, rewrite your narratives, and rise stronger.

Seen through such a lens, failure becomes your greatest life teacher. It is your guide towards an invigorating journey of self-reinvention. Of tangible change, and boundless personal victories.

So, brace for impact and welcome the slap of failure – it may be the wake-up call you need for your grandest evolution yet.

Hated to fail

Like most of you, I hated to fail. As a kid, I was that annoying one who was a combination of:

* played sports well

* got good marks in exams (without much effort)

* cocky and arrogant

If not for failures and multiple slaps in the face, I would be insufferable today.

Plus, not doing what I am doing today.

Without evolution, you cannot survive.

Without introspection, you stagnate.

While rock-bottom is not necessary, some form of bottom is an important catalyst for change.

As a founder/leader, I've needed to repeat these lessons to myself. Because it is difficult to embrace failure when you have more people's lives entwined in yours. At The Quad, we've set out to build a successful fitness coaching company that stays true to our core values. But as one of our friends and early adopters pointed out, the brashness and courage that we had at the start are often lost. Especially when you are successful.

This is a lesson I could always use to remind me. And I thought I'd share a personal story.

Going to college

I lost interest in studying in my XI and XII and didn't do well on my boards. But instead of facing my failure and dealing with the consequences, I bugged the crap out of my parents' and plugged in a cheat code. They paid more money than they could afford to get me into a premier engineering college.

By side-stepping my failure, I lost a valuable opportunity. Fate, however, was on point.

I hated college. It was the same f*****g s**t all over again. Abysmal teachers, "slog over books", regurgitate stuff, and do not learn anything. My personal experience of college education was awful. I went into a deeper hole and acted out for a few years, without realising I was acting out.

The guilt of not doing well in my exams, the guilt of forcing my dad to pay for my college seat (something he was dead against but there's a limit of whining and b******g everyone can stand), and the guilt of hating college - total awfulness.

This failure made me do a couple of things. One, I took my dad's advice when he offered it next. I took a job writing code. A level of code that I had never written. I learned how little I knew. It was truly humbling. After a few months of realising I knew very little, I slowly pushed my coding skills upwards. By the end of one year, I was competent enough to know what was required to write good code.

But I also realised something. I was not happy writing code. I wanted to understand WHY one was building/designing products and how they were experienced. Back in 2004, this was a big question to ask and not many people had the answers to it. But I knew deep down that I needed to understand this.

So, I quit my job (which I was finally seeing progress at) and went to grad school for Interaction Design. I was fully funded. And it remains one of the best decisions I've made in my life. I wouldn't be here today if not for that decision.

And that means the failures that led to it are important. As much as I would've liked to not have the sucky parts, the sucky parts were the catalyst. For a life-changing experience.

The entire episode - questioning the WHY behind a product, having the guts to quit a job I was halfway decent at, finding a graduate school program on a hunch, and getting a scholarship to study - was a huge success. On the back of my failure.

Now, there were a lot more lessons I learned from this entire episode over the years. For example, it is not necessary to conform. It is not required to buy into the games people say you must play. It is important to look at why you are acting out, not just curtail yourself. I'll save those for later.

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.-- Henry Ford

Failure is not the problem. It is the catalyst.

How are you going to respond to failure?

Can you view it as a launchpad for new ideas and approaches?

Musing on my own story, I can see that I need to create systems to experiment and fail better. Faster. Build a learning culture for myself. And for the people I work with.

Creating a culture that encourages learning from failure is an essential leadership task. How does one do that? Promoting open discussions about failures, conducting thorough analyses of these incidents, and proactively seeking opportunities to experiment. But most of all, allowing people to fail.

From enhancing self-awareness to building character, these lessons enable all of us to redefine our strategies and discover better ways of achieving goals.

Accepting Failure and Self-Compassion

To learn from failure, you must first learn to accept it. This involves giving oneself permission to feel uncomfortable emotions associated with failure, practising self-compassion, and adopting a growth mindset. By accepting failure, you open the door to personal and professional growth.

The Transformative Power of Failure

Failure, while often feared, is a crucial part of leadership and life. It provides invaluable lessons that can drive personal growth and organisational success. By embracing failure, you can foster a culture of learning and innovation that ultimately drives success. The key is to view failure not as a stumbling block, but as a stepping stone to greater achievement.

Just because that's cliche does not make it any less true or relevant.

Goal setting

Embarking on your fitness journey can be overwhelming. Especially when you're trying to determine the most effective approach for yourself.

Often, we're inclined to seek advice from others - a close friend or even a fitness personality on social media. They may endorse the methods that have proven successful for them and it's understandable why.

Their path towards personal fitness may have been fraught with challenges and stumbling blocks. Until they discovered what worked best for them. Yet, does that guarantee it will work well for you? Not necessarily.

The more significant concern revolves around the notion of  "this is what your fitness aims should be."

We find ourselves surrounded by awe-inspiring tales of triumph across all walks of life – celebrities, athletes, dedicated trainers and everyday people who've taken charge of their health in impressive ways. This is wonderful - it helps us to set aspirational goals.

But should we work towards the same goals? Not necessarily.

Start simple

More often than not, adopting someone else's goals seems like an easy route out. It provides an immediate starting point without much deliberation required. Which can be a great thing. It prioritises action over extensive planning. Which could sometimes lead to procrastination when embarking on this journey.

There might indeed exist some exceptions to my above observation but usually, our initial aspirations regarding personal wellness tend toward something along these lines:

* I wish I could shed a few kilos.

* I'd love to be able to touch my toes effortlessly one day.

* I want to be able to run a mile without stopping.

But we often tend to overcomplicate matters. This complexity arises when we delve deeper into research or seek expert advice while doing our own thing or deviating from the provided guidelines.

So, do we set our own goals? Or copy someone else's?

Do we find a coach? Or do our own research?

It depends :)

So how does one align unique fitness objectives with appropriate tools and techniques without getting sidetracked by attractive distractions or overdoing it?

It's straightforward. Devise a plan, adhere to it meticulously and after putting in substantial effort, evaluate the outcomes. This cycle is then repeated as necessary.

Empowering oneself through fitness

One of my fundamental beliefs as a coach centres on empowering my students so they can independently manage their fitness regime.

At The Quad, we accentuate excellent methodology in movements by allocating ample time for learning these actions thoroughly until they are on the path towards mastery. We employ an array of drills, progressions, and regressions in our teaching approach with students.

When students part ways with The Quad at the end of their journey with us, they carry away some fundamental lessons that range from:

* efficient squatting technique

* effective breathing method

* Understanding the nuances between what is beneficial and detrimental

* the capacity to differentiate fact from fiction.

Regardless of whether you've on this path for two years or a decade, we aspire to instil in you a sense of personal empowerment throughout your journey.

Firmly, I'm convinced that it's essential for all of us to be present here. You must comprehend:

* The essence of effective strength training

* Steps necessary for preserving your physical power

* The importance and understanding of good mobility

* Actions that can ensure the healthiness of your joints

* The conditioning levels required by your body

* Recognising what "well-being" feels like

* Strategies required to get there.

In my somewhat biased view, the knowledge gained here is invaluable and necessary.

Mentor + Active Interest from YOU

Although I strongly advocate having a coach by one’s side; becoming an active collaborator in one's fitness expedition makes their coach much more efficient.

Throughout my coaching career, I've imparted (near) identical lessons to every single pupil. Those who exhibit remarkable progress are those who engage intensively. They are the ones who provide feedback about what works and what doesn't; those who take ideas into account and then exert efforts towards contextualising them before reverting to results.

And an exceptional quality they all share initially - they show up ready and keen!

So if you’re considering initiating (or reviving) your fitness pursuits – my primary advice would be: to formulate a plan. Then, carry out that plan!

Engage a mentor to guide you on this journey. They should help establish clear markers and objectives for you, allowing you to monitor your progress.

However, never outsource everything without paying attention. No matter how outstanding your coach may be, you must remain proactive.

Comprehend the reasons behind each recommendation given and continue refining the execution - enhancing your squat technique could be an example of this. Pay heed to both physical sensations and thoughts. Creating a robust feedback mechanism involving yourself, your body, your mental state and your coach will yield optimum results.

You may find yourself fortunate enough to have an exceptional coach who is genuinely invested in your fitness journey; someone who supports and encourages personal growth in fitness. The benefits derived from such partnerships are certainly worth it.

But without you playing an active role, it won't happen. Empower yourself on the fundamentals of fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

Some of us just want to zone out and get some time for the brain to work on other things. This is why you see a lot of people talk about taking long walks and coming back with a solution to whatever was bothering them. The time and space given to the brain to float around seems to do some magic. It allows us to relax the brain.

Of course, if you are lifting weights at the gym, you should've done enough practice to ensure that proper lifting techniques are automatic and you are not lifting heavy. This is definitely doable - think of when you are driving and automatically doing a bunch of things while staying safe.

Not everyone needs to enjoy the gym.

Some people know they need to go to the gym and make it happen. They might not like it much. But they know it is necessary. Using a podcast or music or TV, they clock in, do the work, and get out.

Not everyone likes to watch a serious movie.

Some of us like to watch shitty movies (or shitty TV shows.) Because it allows us to detach. You do whatever works for you.

A lot of people run (or walk) for the meditative state. For alone time. The fitness outcomes are a bonus. They would still continue to do the running, even if those outcomes were not present.

Everyone has different goals.Everyone has different motives.Everyone has different approaches.

The goal might be to just show up.The goal might be to have a fitness habit.The goal might be to use fitness as a keystone habit.Or the goal might be vague.Or even unknown.

The goal will change.The approach will change.Folks who go running might start lifting weights.Folks who are lifting heavy might choose to play sports for a few years.

There is no one-size-fits-all.Your approach, your goals, and your mindset will evolve.It will keep changing.It might be circular.Everything works. Including doing nothing.

What works today might not be the right answer tomorrow.Be flexible.

The key is that you are aware of what you are doing and why you are doing it.

Do it because you want to do it that way.Not because everyone around you is doing that. Not because your feed tells you that.

Instead, listen to yourself.

Do things your way.Listen to your body.Listen to what is working for you.

That is the only way you will last.

Then, why do we fail?

We know what to do - eat better, stay active, get sleep.

Because we try to do too much. And the logistics of it make us fail.

What do I mean by that?

Well, two primary things fail us when we come to logistics.

One, we are "here" and we aim for something too far beyond. From not having gone to the gym in a decade to "I'll go to the gym 5 days a week." And from eating junk foods near daily and not eating enough vegetables, we try to go to "30 days of no junk."

Two, we might be able to do this for a few weeks. We can say no to friends and social events for a short duration. But we’ve not properly planned for life.

Instead, let's focus on the delta. What the heck is a delta? I am lifting this from calculus (differentiation) where we are looking at sensitivity of change.

Let's say your current lifestyle is normalised as a score of 30 (out of 100). When you go on a diet or start a gym habit, you are trying to boost that score from 30 to 80+. But that's too much for you to handle.

Instead, all you should be focusing on is something more than 30. Let's say 50. Which might mean, in tangible terms:

* Remove "some" of the grain and replace that with whatever vegetables you are eating. Remove some more of the grain and replace that with some protein - any protein. You can read more about this in my plate inversion protocol.

* skipping the juice.

And that's it. Forget having a salad for lunch. Forget aiming to go to the gym daily. Forget trying to eat 3 portions of protein. By creating the above small but significant change, the delta, you will see progress.

When you focus on "ideal", you will fail.

Because ideal is far beyond the flow channel for you. For now. Instead, focus on finding the Goldilocks zone.

Once you go from 30 to 50, and 50 becomes your new normal, you can make that 65. And in a few months, 75 becomes your new normal.

Now, you are already in a much better place. You will have hit all your health and fitness goals that you set when you were at 30. But in all probability, you've now upped your goals. Which is fine.

First, celebrate your awesomeness.

And now, when you try to do a "100/100", it is within your reach. You can do that for a couple of months because it is outside your comfort zone. And after that, you won't sink back to a 30. You will go back to a 75.

So, what does this mean in practical terms?

* Stop trying to find an hour daily to exercise. Instead, can you find a 30-minute window to do something? Anything? Remember, it is about something more than what you are doing today. If you are walking already, maybe alternating that with yoga or a sport is the delta you need.

* Stop trying to go all-out with your diet. Instead, can you up your protein and vegetables intake by 25%? Can you cut your junk/alcohol by 25%? Not by 100% but by 25%. For example, if you are eating ice cream 4 times a week, bring it down to 3. That's it!

Remember, fitness and nutrition and this healthy lifestyle is for the rest of your life. You are not going to get away from this by gritting your teeth for a few weeks. Plus, you've already tried that. And it has not worked out.

So, let's do something different.

What I'd recommend is for you to take stock of where you are. Find your current place. And then, chart out a delta for you. Just figure out the next step. Not the next 5 steps. Not the ideal. That's all nonsense.

And then, aim to bridge that gap. And make that your new normal.

Find your delta.

Focus on the delta you can manage.

Within a year, your lifestyle will be much better.

StrongFirst - a world-acclaimed strength and conditioning establishment helmed by Pavel Tsatsouline who lit the fire of kettlebell revival – turned into my guiding star as I relocated back home to Madras in 2011. I was armed with my copy of Enter the Kettlebell, which informed my kettlebell coaching for the first few years.

The Quad community and my coaching experience continued to blossom over the next few years. But I missed being a student. I wondered how I could solve that problem of mine.

SFG-1, March 2016

So when Shaun Cairns, Master Instructor at StrongFirst, visited Kolkata to run the SFG-1 in March 2016, I saw my golden opportunity. Beyond the allure of joining an elite fitness community, the certification was a beacon, pushing me to set a target, to 'peak' and break my own records!

The SFG-1 tests basic kettlebell skills and is topped off by the 5-minute snatch test. One is required to do 100 reps in 5 minutes of the kettlebell snatch - a challenging feat. Even though I had been training with kettlebells for a few years by then, it still warranted an exceptional amount of training. And of course, as I mentioned, it was a great opportunity to push me beyond my comfort zone.

That was the first step. A special thanks to Dr Ramana, who championed the cert and brought it to India.

What's StrongFirst Elite?

Who qualifies to be StrongFirst Elite? Someone who can put in the hard work to clear their top 4 instructor certification programmes. These cover kettlebell, barbell and bodyweight skill certifications at the instructor level, and they are meant to be challenging.

SFG-2, October 2018

The two colleagues that I did the SFG-1 with recommended we do the SFG-2 in South Africa. We were to do this in Johannesburg in Feb of 2018. But I didn't get my visa (although my companions did.) I blamed my weird luck but then, it turned into a great opportunity.

This event spurred me to attend the SFG-2 in Vicenza, Italy in October of 2018. My wife and I used the opportunity to combine it with a holiday but with my very obvious agenda to crack this cert.

To ensure that I was on top of my training, I got a kettlebell shipped to my first place of stay in Italy (yup, some of you know this!). And it was a constant companion for the entirety of my trip. I trained every morning before heading out to sample the sights and food :)

I also had the chance to meet and learn from Pavel himself, the weekend before the certification, by attending the StrongEndurance seminar.

The SFG-2 required me to press half my body weight - again, an immense step up from my skills. Under Fabio Zonin's coaching, I had a tremendous learning experience and yes, I cleared it to become SFG-2 certified!

Assisting in certifications

2019 though, was all about learning and coaching, not just clearing certifications.

* In February 2019, along with a number of my fellow coaches at The Quad, we assisted Shaun Cairns in India's largest SFG-1 certification event. It allowed me an opportunity to view and absorb the coaching from the unique perspective of being an assistant. So much learning here!

* Then in October 2019, I had the opportunity to assist Brett Jones, as part of the SFG-1 happening in Boston, USA. The second such time I assisted and again, the learnings were immense that I could apply to coaching at The Quad and my own training.

October 2021, the Barbell Cert

Post that, towards the end of the pandemic in October 2021, Shaun organised the SFL - the barbell certification. I had not lifted barbells regularly for the better part of a decade and I thought this was a great chance to pick up what was my first tool in my strength journey.

The Deadlift and Military Press were pretty straightforward. But the bench press (always a weak lift of mine) was significantly more than anything I had ever done. I had never bench pressed even my body weight. Now, a decade older, I was required to bench 1.25x. Not a significant load for a lifter but certainly for me.

But guess what? As we always say, showing up works! I got a great coaching experience and over the next 3 months following the certification, applied what I learned and achieved my bench press, and with it, the SFL.

March 2023, the Bodyweight cert

And finally, earlier this year, the Bodyweight version of the certification took place in my hometown of Madras. The one-arm one-leg pushup stumped me. Even though I could do a bunch of pushups, the OAOLPU is a skill that poked holes in how well I knit my body together.

Again, post the certification, a few weeks of applying what I learned led to me passing the certification.

You can see in my first attempt, I did not have a one-arm pushup. And while my one-arm, one-leg is shaky and all that, it is a huge improvement.

And honestly, 90% of the improvement and application in what I've learned from these certifications comes in the subsequent years. The 10% that comes immediately after is the part that enabled me to go from zero to one.

Elite

To be an Elite Instructor, one needs to show they can do all the testing standards of all 4 certifications. Hard but definitely doable. At every step, after every certification, I felt I had come a long way while having my mind blown away by the coaching I had just received.

Over the past 7 years, what I loved the most about this journey is how it has taken me from a student to a teacher. Assisting and learning from multiple coaches, each interaction has been a stepping stone towards my goal. I continue to re-learn the lesson that there's a lot to learn and that's the fun part of it. And crucially, learning without doing is useless.

Today, I stand here, as India's first StrongFirst Elite Instructor, a testament to the fact that no obstacle is too big when your determination is stronger. I think I may even go as far as to say, I'm proud of myself - for staying the course, and for seeing it through.

I've glossed over a lot - injuries and setbacks, for one. Or the amount of time spent training. Or the amount of coaching and help I received from folks. This post is already too long to get into all that.

Remember, the journey is never easy, but with focus and determination, the destination is always within reach, whatever you choose your destination to be. Keep showing up!

In this article, we will explore the mindset required for successful weight maintenance. We will also delve into the common reasons for weight regain. And finally, practical strategies to lose weight and keep it off for good.

The Mindset for Weight Maintenance: Marathon or Sprint or something else altogether?

Embarking on the journey of weight loss AND maintenance is not for the faint of heart. It requires a complete shift in mindset from viewing it as a temporary task to embracing it as a lifelong commitment. It's not about reaching the finish line; it's about maintaining the pace after the race is over.

The race is the losing weight bit. But why weight loss is not permanent is because we switch off after the race wraps up. Here's where the analogy stops and life begins - you got to do work. Daily.

Also, remember - it is actually fat loss and not weight loss.

Understanding the Weight Loss and Weight Maintenance Mindset

The initial stages of weight loss can be exhilarating as you see the numbers on the scale go down. Yet, the real challenge lies in sustaining this progress. The weight maintenance mindset is about accepting that this journey is not a temporary phase. Instead, it is a permanent lifestyle change.

It's about finding a sustainable balance between healthy eating and physical activity. And incorporating it into your daily routine for the long haul. If you cannot put it in your context, it won't work.

The Importance of Consistency and Resilience

Weight maintenance is a game of consistency and resilience. It's about making health-conscious decisions consistently and bouncing back even when you slip up. It is important to acknowledge that you will slip up. Otherwise, you will be sidelined when you do. That spirals into a game of blame and guilt that serves nobody.

Remember, it's okay to have a treat meal or miss a workout. What's important is not to let these minor setbacks derail your overall progress. Be consistent, be resilient, and remember that every step, no matter how small, is a step in the right direction.

In fact, it is important to have treat meals. It is important to NOT aim for 100%. There are periods when you want to be switched on. These are not the majority. Likewise, there will be periods when you want to switch off. The third bit - hovering at 85% - is the magic.

Decoding the Cycle: Why Do We Regain Weight?

Understanding why we regain weight is the first step towards breaking the cycle of yo-yo dieting. Here are some common reasons why those lost pounds creep back up on us.

The Physiology of Weight Regain

Our bodies are programmed for survival. Fat storage is a crucial evolutionary trait that is prized. Was. Weight loss, especially rapid weight loss, can trigger a survival response.

As you lose weight, your body's metabolism slows down to conserve energy, leading to fewer calories burned at rest.

At the same time, your body's appetite-regulating hormones shift, causing an increase in hunger and a decrease in satiety. This combination of a slower metabolism and increased appetite can set the stage for weight regain.

The Impact of Diet and Exercise Habits

Many of us approach weight loss with a short-term mindset. We adopt strict diets and intense workout regimens that are difficult to maintain in the long run. Once we achieve our weight loss goals, we often revert to our old eating and exercise habits, leading to weight regain. This is understandable because we went above and beyond. Which is frickin' amazing. But it comes back to the long-term.

Sustainable weight maintenance requires long-term changes to diet and exercise habits.

The Role of the Environment

Our environment plays a significant role in our weight management journey. Easy access to high-calorie, processed foods and a sedentary lifestyle can make it challenging to maintain weight loss. It's crucial to create an environment that supports healthy eating and regular physical activity.

Strategies for Success: How to Lose Weight and Keep It Off

Armed with an understanding of why weight regain happens, we can now explore practical strategies for successful weight maintenance. Remember, there's no one-size-fits-all approach to weight loss and maintenance. What works for one person may not work for another, and the key is to find a balance that works for you.

The Importance of a Balanced Diet

A balanced diet is the cornerstone of weight maintenance.

No fad diets.

No super-restrictive diets.

Instead, start with and stick to the fundamentals. Aim for a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. Dairy, if you can tolerate it. Lentils and legumes, of course. And to round it off, whole grains.

This not only provides your body with the nutrients it needs but also keeps you feeling full and satisfied, making it easier to resist cravings.

Making Activity a Habit

Physical activity is a crucial component of weight maintenance. Find activities you enjoy, such as walking, dancing, cycling, or yoga, and make them a part of your daily routine. Remember, every bit of movement counts. Even small changes like taking the stairs instead of the elevator or going for a short walk during your lunch break can make a difference. Remember, we discussed TDEE and NEAT and acronyms like that.

The Role of Regular Self-Monitoring

Regular self-monitoring is an effective tool for weight maintenance. This could include weighing yourself, tracking your food intake, or keeping a record of your physical activity.

Self-monitoring will help you stay accountable. It will help you identify any patterns or habits that may be contributing to weight regain.

I understand that these are potential triggers for a bunch of you. I am not asking you to "just do it." But not monitoring it is also not an option. You need to find an approach that works for you.

Let's say you take 10 steps forward. And then stop monitoring. What happens is you find yourself 11 steps back in a year. But if we can set alarms and alerts so that when we are 2 steps behind to do a mini-push, to keep making micro-corrections - wouldn't that be amazing?

Yep!

Seeking Support

Weight maintenance can be a challenging journey, and having a support system can make all the difference. This could be a weight loss support group, a dietitian, a personal trainer, or even a friend or family member. Or all of the above!

Having someone to share your struggles and successes with can provide motivation and encouragement. At The Quad, the magical community does most of the work which leads to our incredible results. Yes yes, the coaches and all that are top-notch. But it all comes down to intent and the individual. And that's where the community shines!

Resources for Weight Management

* Weight loss apps. There are countless weight loss programs and apps available that offer meal plans, workout routines, and tracking tools to help you stay on track. I am biased here and I'll point you towards the Daily9.Why? Two reasons. One, you do not need a meal plan. You need a framework. You need to contextualise it. Which our coaches will help you with.Two, we've developed a system for the 100%, for the 85% and for the pass mark too. Our programme, while wildly successful for fat loss, is actually built for weight maintenance.

* Get coaching. Talk to a nutritionist. Or a wellness coach.We built the Daily9 to be a "cheap and best" alternative to expensive nutritionists.

* Do it yourself. With a group of friends, you can do this yourself. Absolutely.

Embrace the Journey, Not Just the Destination

Weight maintenance is not about achieving a perfect number on the scale. It is about embracing a healthier and more active lifestyle. It's about making sustainable changes that you can stick with in the long run.

Remember, weight maintenance is a journey, not a destination, and every step you take towards a healthier lifestyle is a step in the right direction.

And the journey involves ups and downs.

The journey involves rapid progress, stalling, creeping forward, slipping up, inching forward and everything you can think of.

In the end, the secret to successful weight maintenance is not about finding the perfect diet or workout regimen. It's about developing a mindset of resilience, consistency, and self-compassion.

That last bit is something I personally needed to understand. For myself and for my students. It is easy to brush past it. But from what I've seen, that is THE thing to focus on - self-compassion.

It's about understanding that weight maintenance is a lifelong journey and that setbacks are part of the process. It's about finding joy in the journey and celebrating every small victory along the way. So, embrace the journey!

Not just the destination. Instead, every milestone should be celebrated.

You got this!

Once more, you take responsibility for what has happened. Laudable. You have encountered failure before.

You draw motivation from the people you know who have successfully transformed their unhealthy habits into much healthier ones. Next time, you think, you can crack it. But why do you find motivation so hard? Why is your willpower weaker than those f*****s who seem to have figured it out?!

However, you find it impossible to accomplish.

The blame lies with you. Had you only been able to...Stop.

I don't like to talk about the experiences that enabled me to get fit. Nevertheless, it can be a powerful motivator for others to realise that if I can do it, then so can they.

My intent is for you to get motivated by my journey. You figure out the translation of whatever worked for me (or for anyone around you that's been successful) and you implement it.

However, the outcome is a tumble and self-recriminations.

Would you believe me if I said that it wasn't your fault?

Despite putting forth your best effort from the outset, if something happens to come up, it's understandable.

Trying to implement a new diet or workout plan is like trying to fight the tide. It is swimming against the current. It is achievable, and some may even be successful. But most will be unable to make any progress and be pushed back.

This regime concerning diet and exercise is not exclusively centred on one single person. It is not within one's power to control. It definitely looks that way.

All the odds are against you achieving success.

It's crazy, but with food delivery apps, you can get anything your heart desires from any city. I mean, I can even have Nolen Gur Rasagullas from Calcutta delivered to me - how wild is that?!

Your endeavours face opposition. Your work culture sucks. If you aim to move up the hierarchy, you must put in laborious hours. You must work in odd time zones. You must take on the tasks of the individual they recently dismissed. But f**k no, it is not a promotion. That's just a carrot dangled.

To complete necessary tasks and still have a little time to spend with loved ones, you must sacrifice some of your sleep in a day that has a limited number of hours.

The apprehension increases. The levels of cortisol in the body rise. The Heart Rate Variability (HRV) decreases. This chemical imbalance in one's body makes it more difficult to have the motivation to go to the gym and to make healthy dietary choices.

You find yourself opting to pass on the gym instead, and to satisfy your cravings (brought on by stress at work and home), you indulge in comfort foods. Unknowingly, you are allowing yourself to be affected by the stress-induced appetite, and you attribute it to a lack of self-control.

I am not doing you any favours by saying that, in the past, running 500m was something I could not do. However, now I have made progress.

I did something difficult, but what use is it to you?

I'm still searching for a response.

It's been an issue that's been on my mind for a while now.

The system is fucked up. The work environment is terrible. None of the food companies or pharmaceutical companies are looking out for our well-being.

It can be a treacherous journey.

But we will figure it out.

It is imperative to understand that you are not to blame.

It can be difficult to go against the flow.

Let's start with realising it is not all your fault.

In my previous article, I wrote about the importance of fat loss vs weight loss. If you used the calculator I linked to, you know what your Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR) was, as well as what your Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE) was. They are nothing but what your body needs to run itself at rest (BMR) and then add up your walking around during the day and doing your thing, your daily activity which gives the TDEE. Remember, a calorie is a unit of energy. We talk about kilometres per litre of fuel for our car - all units we've made up. Likewise, a calorie is a unit we made up. And you need a certain amount of calories to run your body.

And there's a reasonable amount of calories you can undereat to achieve healthy fat loss. For example, if your BMR is 1500 and your TDEE is 2100 - anything under 2100 will lead to weight loss. But if that number is too much under, that sends the wrong signals to your body.

Understanding a Sustainable Diet Plan

A sustainable diet plan finds the right number for you. The complexity is it is NOT only about the number i.e. quantity but about the quality of ingredients you are putting in.

There have been things like the Twinkie diet and the Potato diet and all that which have tried to tell you that as long as you maintain a calorie deficit, you will see weight loss. Yes, true.

But once again, we want

* Healthy

* Fat loss

* Sustainably

Let me continue with some numbers from last week.

* BMR = 1500 calories

* TDEE = 2350 calories

* sustainable calorie deficit = 350 calories

This means I will aim to eat (very approximately and for the purposes of maths), 2000 calories. This means I will lose 1 kilo every 20 days (remember, 1 kilo of fat = 7700 calories.)

Now, the Twinkie diet and Potato diet tell you that you can eat 2000 calories of Twinkies or potatoes and achieve weight loss. True.

But you intuitively know that's a fucked up way to go about things, right? If you ate 2000 calories of pizza and doughnuts for the next 100 days, you should technically see 5 kilos of weight loss. The maths say that's true.

But that's because we are seeing one variable of measurement alone. What about your cholesterol? What about your blood sugar? What about feeling hungry for a large portion of the day? What about the insulin response in your body to tons of sugar and cheap carbs? You cannot turn a blind eye to that.

Imagine this. If your doctor was given the question paper for their "doctor exam" and they studied only those answers. And they got the marks needed to pass the exam and be a doctor. They didn't understand what they studied. They did not understand their field. They got the cheat code and now are going to treat you. Does that make you feel secure?

In the same way, the point is not to pass the exam i.e. by hook or crook under eat by some number below your TDEE.

Benefits of a Healthy Weight Loss Diet Plan

When you follow a healthy diet, you will:

* lose more fat than the arbitrary weight.

* improve your health markers, potentially improving the cholesterol numbers, your blood glucose and insulin numbers and a whole host of things that are out of scope for this article.

* feel more energetic.

* feel less brain fog.

* improve your body from the inside out!

That's the transformation we all crave - a true one that encompasses all of us. While the world separates the mind from the body, you know that when you eat junk food, your brain is not that great. When you deprive yourself of sleep, your brain is not at 100%. If you believe otherwise, you are umm, whatever is a nicer way to say, idiot. That's not me being an ass. That's science saying you are an ass.

Important Factors in a Diet for Weight Loss

So, what are the fundamental factors that need to feature in a diet?

* High-quality food.

* A macronutrient ratio that suits you and your needs. That means you have a ratio of carbs - protein - fats that suits you. The Indian diet, whichever part of India you are in, is high in carbohydrates because rice or wheat is the staple of our meals.

* Minimal junk food. Their presence is to sprinkle our life with fun. I mean, eating cake is fun and so is chilling and drinking beer with your buddies. That goes beyond nutrition and is important for relationships and life.

* Doing this for a long time. Which means this is your lifestyle. You are eating a salad because you enjoy the salad, how it feels. And not as a means to an end - when after 100 days and 5 kilos you can eat pizza to replace the salad. It is NOT either/or!

* Eating the foods you generally eat. This means you maintain your cultural orientation, coupled with where you are geographically, and your taste buds.

* Maintaining a calorie deficit. There's no way around it. Every diet that works achieves this in some form or the other. My stance is that you should achieve it ONLY in a healthy fashion.

* Not starving!

An Example of an Effective Indian Diet Plan to Lose Weight

Here is an EXAMPLE diet plan to lose weight. We will put together a few tools to achieve it.

First, we will use intermittent fasting (IF). I am not going to deep dive into this but I do want to make two points. One, the larger goal of IF is to promote autophagy. Two, most of us use IF to achieve a calorie deficit. That's fine but it is important to know it. In this diet, I am using it primarily to achieve the latter. If there's interest, I'll deep dive into what IF is in another post.

Second, we will use a vegetarian diet, simply because I am vegetarian and I am going to use my numbers for the example. It is much easier to add meat to a diet than to convert it into a vegetarian diet, in my opinion.

Let's break down some numbers. Remember, numbers are a ballpark and you should not calorie count religiously.

My TDEE = 2350 and I want to achieve a calorie deficit of 350, which means I have ~2000 calories to play with.

For IF to be useful and sustainable, especially if you are new to it, we will employ a 14-hour fasting window and a 10-hour feeding window. The easiest way to fast that long is to ensure your sleep covers the majority of your fasting window. In this universe, you will be spending 8 hours in bed, most of it asleep. Because that's a core part of your long-term sustainable health.

* 10.30 pm: Go to bed

* 6.30 am: Wake up

* Between 6.30 am and 7.30 am --> hot water. What?! Why?!??!

* After 7.30 am: Black coffee or green tea.

* Lot more water.

* 10.30 am: Breakfast

* 2.30 pm: Lunch

* 7.30 pm: Dinner

* The last morsel consumed before 8.30 pm

Let's break this down.

8.30 pm --> 10.30 am = your fasting window, which is 14 hours.

10.30 am --> 8.30 pm = your feeding window, which is 10 hours.

Again, this is an example. You can do it any way you prefer. For example, you can eat breakfast at 6.30 am and wrap up your last meal by 4.30 pm. What matters is the 14/10 split.

So, what are you eating in this example? High-quality food. That means lots of plants. Some good fats. Adequate protein. But let's be a bit specific about it, shall we?

Breakfast

* 3-4 eggs

* a slice of whole-grain toast

* some butter

This is going to be ~400-500 calories.

Lunch

* 1 cup of rice

* 1 cup of cabbage

* 1 cup of capsicum, carrot, and beans mixed together.

* 1 tbsp of cooking oil

* 1 cup of curd

* 1 cup of dal in sambar or whatever form

This is going to be ~600-800 calories

Snack

* half a cup of unflavoured Greek yoghurt

* a handful of blueberries

* a sprinkling of pumpkin seeds and almonds

This is going to be ~200-300 calories.

Dinner

* 2-3 rotis

* 1 cup of paneer gravy

* 1 cup of vegetable sabzi

* 1 cup of curd

This is going to be ~600 calories.

Putting it together

We are approximately at 2000 calories. The macronutrient split is rather balanced.

The quality of food is high. We are getting ~3 cups of vegetables, 1 cup of dal, 1 cup of paneer, 2 cups of curd, 1/2 cup of Greek yoghurt, and 2 cups of rice+wheat.

As you can see this is a substantial amount of food. One of the key ingredients of a successful diet is to not go into starvation mode but to maintain a deficit. We achieve that here by increasing the quality of foods, which are generally lower in calories but higher in nutrients.

For a more thorough example, I recommend you check this Daily9 post out.

The importance of flexibility

While you can make 7 similar iterations of the example above, have one for each day of the week and achieve glorious results, the important thing is most diets fail when they clash with reality.

What does that mean? Well, it means going out with your family, catching up with your friends, taking a vacation, having a night out and a 100 other things that make life fun.

So, be flexible. But not too flexible.

If you can do this 85% of the time, you will be fine.

It means it will take a bit longer than 20 days to lose a kilo, say 30 days. But it means you will be able to do this for much longer.

On paper, this means you can lose 12 kilos in a year. While having a 15% window for fun. If your requirements can be made even calmer, say 6 kilos a year, this means your window for relaxation increases.

Remember, it is your diet. Your taste buds. Your life. Your cultural background. Your sustainable interpretation of it.

Find it. Live it.

Embarking on a fat loss journey can often seem like navigating a labyrinth full of myths and misconceptions, but it doesn't have to be! Welcome to Fat Loss 101, your comprehensive and basic guide to understanding and successfully managing fat loss.

I am not going to dive deep into the science - that won't be a 101 post. I want to explain some fundamentals that will help you understand fat loss better and for you to develop your own heuristics when you face a choice.

With my guidance, achieving your health goals won't be a strenuous uphill battle, but rather an enlightening, empowering experience. Let's embark on this journey towards a healthier you, together!

Fat loss versus weight loss

An important piece of semantics is that you (and I) want to lose non-functional weight. All of us carry some excess weight. Men tend to carry this around their belly while women tend to carry this around their hips and thighs. That's how the body is designed.

When you generically say "weight loss", you want the number on the weighing scale to go down. But that's not as relevant to your health. I understand that the number might be an important factor for you and I am not demeaning that at all. But having that number go down is not enough of an indicator for your long-term health. And I am all about your long-term health.

When you start a diet (any diet), you might see some immediate drop in the scale. What tends to happen is you lose some excess water, especially because you are eating less carbs and sugars. And when we tend to do some dramatic dieting, the body indiscriminately burns muscle tissue - which again registers as weight loss on the scale. Burning muscle tissue is worse than slapping yourself in the face.

So, what you want and need is fat loss. Not weight loss. While measuring your body fat percentage is how you figure this out, a great proxy is your waist.

Fat loss takes time

It will not happen immediately. Yes, you want to see quick results. But as I said earlier, you might see weight loss. But to achieve fat loss, it takes a few weeks at least.

First, let's know the different kinds of fat:

* Subcutaneous fat i.e. the fat stored right beneath your skin. This is the fat you want to lose. But this is NOT the biggest problem, to be honest. After getting your waist-height ratio under 0.5, you can not worry too much about this.

* Visceral fat i.e. the fat around your organs. This is the DANGER fat and what all of us should be working on at the start. But I know you want to look better, and well, burning some of the subcutaneous fat will mean you are on the right track metabolically, so that's fine. Non-alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease, for example, is what happens when we have too much fat around our liver.

* Essential fat - the brain, the marrow, our cell membranes - is well, essential.

So, remember, all fat is not bad. The fat you want to get rid of is NOT the real danger. We want to get rid of #2 and losing #1 along the way is a great side-effect (for aesthetics.) And of course, losing non-functional weight (to an extent) means daily activities are easier and our calorie requirement reduces.

So, back to why fat loss takes time. The fact that you've accumulated fat around your organs means there's a problem going on metabolically. And that's what we need to correct. We need to solve that problem, start burning our visceral fat, and get healthier. As we do that, the excess fat stored in the subcutaneous area will also start to be used up.

The issue is this: we are eating too many calories. And while reducing calories is a great first step, we have many smaller issues metabolically speaking. Fixing them is going to take time.

But I want to get rid of that fat around my belly alone

I understand. Once again, let me remind you that is not the worst thing in the world (fat around your organ is.)

Second, fat loss happens in sheets/layers. You cannot target one specific area for fat loss. It is a full-body process. You do the right actions and your body realises that it can start using the stored fuel (fat) for its processes. And so, it starts to utilise non-essential fats for this purpose.

While the biggest area of fat storage is the belly/thigh/hips, you will find that you have subcutaneous fats in various places. For example, on your back. That's why the waist is a useful proxy as more fat is stored here.

Low-intensity exercise

Why does low-intensity exercise matter? Shouldn't we do high-intensity (HIIT) and hit this stuff harder?

High-intensity exercise uses glucose as the fuel. All the food we eat is converted into glucose. The excess foods (carbs or dietary fats) are converted into body fat and stored for later purposes. Protein is used for the body's structural work that is always ongoing.

So, while HIIT might burn "more" calories per minute, what you are looking for is to signal to the body to start using the stored fats for energy. To do that, we need to fix the underlying metabolic issues going on and also not work in the "burn glucose" zone. Brisk walking, for example, is a great idea. I'll write a post about cardio exercise and Zone-2 cardio soon.

Can we lose fat without exercise?

You can. Fat loss is about:

* ensuring you are not consuming more energy than you need. That is being in a mild to moderate calorie deficit.

* ensuring you are sleeping enough. Without sleep, your body is going to be in a stressed-out mode and not be in the mood to give up its stored fat.

* ensuring your stress levels are under control.

* quality of nutrition. While quantity is important, so is quality. The foods you eat are how you are going to fix the underlying metabolic systems.

Simply put,

* sleep at least 7 hours every night. If you want to learn how to fall asleep faster, here you go.

* don't be stressed out - if you are working 50+ hour weeks, you are probably stressed out whether you realise it or not.

* A substantial portion of your diet should be vegetables. They are high in fibre, high in nutrients.

* get "adequate" protein from whatever sources you consume. Adequate is a vague term but I am not going to go deeper than that in this post.

* Dietary fat does not make you fat. So, do consume some good fats. Again, not going to dive deeper into this.

Then what's the big deal about exercise?

A few things:

* Strength training helps you put on muscle. Which improves your metabolic mumbo jumbo significantly. It improves your base metabolic rate i.e. the amount of energy needed to keep the system working.

* Good cardiovascular fitness means improved mumbo jumbo, like mitochondrial density etc. This means your body learns to burn its stored fat rather than going to glucose as the go-to.

* Exercise burns calories. So, this gives you more breathing room to ensure your calorie intake for the day is less than what you expend.

How many calories do I need?

You can use this tool to calculate. Using me as an example,

* my BMR is 1528 calories. This means Basal Metabolic Rate. This is the number of calories that my body needs to keep it going, while I am at rest.

* my TDEE is 2368 calories. TDEE means Total Daily Energy Expenditure. This is a sum of our BMR, plus what we spend while doing exercise, what we spend via NEAT (walking about, fidgeting etc) and the thermic effect of food (energy is needed to burn the food you eat.) So, adding up those 4 things gives us TDEE. If you want to lose fat without exercise, you can see how one of these 4 will be zero. So, definitely doable.

To lose 1 kilo of fat means burning 7700 calories. So, it is simple math. If I am burning 2368 calories and want to lose 1 kilo a week, I need to be in a deficit of 7700/7 = 1100/day. That means I need to eat 1268 calories per day. That's too much of a deficit, especially as I don't want to be cranky or tired, and I want to strength train. Going for a much smaller deficit is better. I'll go with 350 calories/day. That means it will take me 20 days to lose 1 kilo. Make sense?

Calorie counting is the way to go?

I am not a fan of calorie counting, for multiple reasons.

* Tedious and time-consuming. It takes time and effort to keep logging every meal.

* Imperfect. Calories are all approximations and there's way too much going on - how much you absorb for example.

* Indian food and calories are even more imperfect. How much daal goes into your meal versus mine versus what the website from where you are getting the calorie information?!?!

But it is a useful tool to understand your baseline. Doing a thorough food log and counting calories for a few days will give you a good idea of where you are starting off.

Next steps

* Calculate your TDEE.

* Calorie count for 3-4 days.

* See what is a reasonable deficit for you.

That will get you started. Post that, eat real food. Be patient.

If you are not seeing enough progress, you might need to (a) eat a bit lesser, (b) improve your activity, (c) be more patient, (d) up your sleep, or (e) tinker around some more with your macronutrients.

And remember, you cannot constantly be on fat loss mode. You go on fat loss mode for a few weeks or months, depending on your bandwidth. Then, you switch to maintenance. And you keep toggling between the two, based on your life, bandwidth and all that.

In future posts, I'd like to talk about what metabolic blah-blahs need work, the blood work related to it so we can measure and identify it and so on.

But actually, what would you like to know better?

But ten overs in, the familiar feelings started. The singles got slower and slower. Running with the pads felt like I was running in a thick pudding. My brain and body kept getting slower and slower. And I'd make an inevitable mistake or get run out. Again.

Wanting to be fit was something I yearned for, ever since. I was not fast. I was not strong. Nor did I have much stamina. It was a crippling handicap. But the real handicap was not knowing that I could do something about it. As silly as it sounds, I did not know I could get stronger by lifting weights. Or get better at running by running more. I (wrongly) assumed that all of us had what we had.

How else could I explain my teammate who could generate obscene pace or whack a ball for 6 while I wouldn't even contemplate clearing the in-field?! Or my buddies who could run a lap twice as fast as me, or run longer?!

Being able to run 20 kilometres or lift twice my body weight was not about the actual act. On an absolute scale, thousands of people do that casually. But my scale is not absolute. There's the kid in my memory who struggled to swim a lap and this guy is doing what that kid never thought possible.

That's what my journey was about. Breaking a previously set limit - due to a combination of ignorance, wrong beliefs, and lack of coaching - and realising that lesson applies to the game of life too. As Earl Nightingale says, "You are what you think about." And for the longest time, I told myself that I was a weak kid who could never get fit. My breakthrough moment came not when I joined a running community or completed my first race. But when I questioned my assumption.

And instead said, "I can get fit."

That was it. It was that simple. Then, the positive reinforcement in the form of running a bit more and breaking my previous ceiling allowed things to snowball.

We set arbitrary limits on ourselves. We overthink. We don't know what we don't know. We are scared. I certainly was. It was easier to tell myself that I was born this way rather than to take control.

And so, we tell ourselves stupid s**t and hold ourselves back. I am sure there's an evolutionary reason for it. But c'mon, there's no reason to tell yourself that you cannot get fit. Or learn a new skill. Or learn that new programming language. Or become a badass developer/scientist/designer.

I know for a fact that it is untrue - that you cannot do it. Not just for me but for anyone. Fitness is a brilliant sandbox to play in and learn from. The same ingredients are required to get to where you need to go - a forward step, some guidance, and the belief that you got this.

You got this!

Just like a car that’s not necessarily broken down, but isn’t performing at its peak potential. It's not spewing smoke or refusing to start, so it doesn't command immediate attention like a car with an obvious mechanical issue. But the engine is not as efficient as it could be, the fuel consumption is higher than it should be, and the ride isn't as smooth as it once was. Those "in-between" cars are still on the road, but they're not functioning at their best. They need that fine-tuning, the right fuel and consistent maintenance to truly thrive and give a high-performance ride.

Individuals in the 'in-between' health state need to take preventative action and proactive measures to ensure they move towards optimum health rather than avoiding sickness.

It is clear when we are sick. You see a doctor. You need to take medication. For those of us who have a lifestyle disease, like diabetes, we need to see the doctor, monitor certain markers, and keep taking medicines.

It is clear when we are healthy. Because we feel it. And because we are putting in commensurate effort towards it.

But the in-between zone is the problematic zone. Like a car that's not in peak condition, we know things are not great. But we are nowhere close to breaking down. And so, we do not prioritise our health. We feel we have time. We'll do it later when we need it.

My claim is that we need it NOW!

The effort needed is for the rest of your life. The earlier you start, the better.

Waiting for a storm

Pain is the end signal.

Numbers being bad are the end signal.

We should NOT wait for that.

Like a seasoned sailor can predict a storm by observing subtle changes in the environment, we too should be able to anticipate pain or a downfall before it turns into a catastrophe. We shouldn't wait for the sky to darken, the winds to howl, or the waves to get monstrous to acknowledge the impending storm. Instead, we should pay attention to the gentle breeze that suddenly picks up the pace or the sea birds that start flying inland, much like noticing small changes in our personal or professional circumstances.

Pain and negative results, like the storm, are the end signals. However, the symptoms always exist, hiding within the situation's normality, and waiting for detection. We must hone our ability to pick up on these early signals so we can navigate our boat to safety before the storm hits.

What do I watch for?

Your blood work is not that bad.

Your sugar levels do not indicate a problem, yet.

Nothing seems that off.

But your lifestyle and habits are not above the line.

This is where we come to iffy territory. What do we measure? What should our effort be centred around?

A lot of things. Or one core thing around which everything revolves. To list a few things that have come up in conversations with my students:

* fitness

* health

* energy levels

* productivity

* work-life balance

* relationship health

* freedom

* fun

* mood

* and so on.

Some of these can be made objective. Fitness, for example, in my realm is done this way. For health, we can start with the Waist to Height ratio and go from there. But many others are subjective. They require us to keep an eye on and tweak efforts.

Change

And that's the change I urge you to start off with. That's the change I like to coach and work towards.

Let's keep an eye on things that are important to us. Let's keep an eye on the current effort.

And then make adjustments along the way. We tweak effort as needed. We revise our goals or benchmarks as we grow and evolve.

You need to have a clear idea about the effort to put in. I use the Daily9 system to ensure I take care of my basics. Any custom goal that I have goes on top.

If you are not putting in the effort, be suspicious of the numbers.

I don't sleep 7 hours. I drink alcohol daily. I don't care what I eat.

You cannot get away with it.

Sure, genetics play a role. But things will come crashing down someday.

Remember, things do not need to come crashing down before you take action.

A new mentality

We need a new outlook. We need a new mentality.

We are a sample size of 1 and that's okay. We are the universe. Let's focus on ourselves and figure out what we need to do. What's important to us. And figure out the requisite effort to do so.

Let's not stay passive. Let's not be caught in no-man's land.

Let's take control of our own health.

If you are approaching 40 and concerned that you have not had time to dedicate towards fitness consistently, this article is for you.

You can get fit at any age.

You can get fit regardless of where you are currently.

But. There are some rules/conditions that you need to accept.

No, it is not your current fitness levels or your genetics or access to a good coach or any such thing.

First, fitness is for the long haul.

Second, you will be making progress slower than you'd like.

Third, you will stumble. A lot.

You can get fit starting today if you can accept the above three axioms.

If you cannot accept those, this article and website are NOT for you.

Benefits of fitness for people over 40

Muscles

Nope, not big showy muscles. That's not my jam, nor should it be of much interest to you. As we age, we tend to lose muscle mass. Muscle mass is important to us.

* They are protective. If you fall, well, you have a sturdy piece of tissue that can take the damage. They protect your insides well.

* Muscles promote insulin sensitivity. They improve your overall metabolic health. Diabetes and obesity are two big self-inflicted diseases in our society today. While nutrition and sleep play a big part, muscles go a long way in your preventive health too.

* Weight maintenance is easier if you have more muscle tissue.

* Extra protein storage. Our bodies use proteins (amino acids) for a lot of their processes. In emergency situations, our body can tap into extra protein from our muscles to take care of a problem. This makes recovery from illness and diseases faster.

Bone density

Your bones get stronger and denser. They can handle more stress. If you fall, for example. As we age, one of the biggest health hazards we have is falling and breaking something. Because a fracture at 60 is much harder to heal than one at 20.

With stronger bones, you become more resilient. With more muscle mass on you, your body is more anti-fragile.

You are fighting the good fight against arthritis and osteopenia etc.

Cardio health

Remember, your heart is also a muscle. By sensibly exercising it, you build a stronger heart that is capable of supporting your various functions.

Long-duration, low-intensity cardiovascular work is great for building your aerobic base and improving the blood flow to your body. When you do higher-intensity exercise, the better your aerobic base, the better your recovery will be.

A good combination of interval training and steady-state training will ensure your heart is capable of any demands you might place on it - from carrying your kids up a few flights of stairs to pushing your car if you ever get stranded somewhere, to helping your friends with their couches.

Longevity / anti-ageing

Exercise helps clear out cellular garbage and keeps our cells functioning optimally -- David Sinclair

Activity is amongst the top tools we have today in the realm of anti-ageing. Sensible fitness activities ensure your body cleans itself up rather well and removes the waste products that make you "old" and all that. You can read more over here on TIME, or listen to a detailed podcast over here.

Joint health

We tend to lose the function of our joints as we age because we are not using them fully. Can you squat? With your butt hovering an inch or two over the floor? Can you hang out there comfortably for a minute or two?

Losing joint mobility means our bodies are not going to move optimally. It means other joints will start to move in places where they are NOT meant to. Which results in pain, or in worse situations, injuries.

Let me give you an example. When our hips are not mobile to squat low, we bend our lower back when picking up a weight off the floor. And with that weight, we straighten our lower back. Moving the spine under load, especially due to compensation from poor joints above and below it, is a common cause of injury. The fix for these is two-fold. First, improve hip mobility. Second, add resilience to the lower back. These can only happen via sensible fitness training.

Understanding your body and limitations

To achieve your fitness goals, it's crucial to understand your body's limitations. First and foremost, assess your current physical state to determine where you stand. Pain, joint limitations, and health issues are all constraints that require a thorough understanding.

Once you have a clear understanding of your limitations, it's time to construct a workout plan that fits your unique needs. Though you can find plenty of free or cheap training plans online, it's best to seek expert advice. By tailoring a workout plan that works for you, you'll make progress safely and inevitably. However, if you're eager to dive into the planning process, that's great too! You don't have to be a strength coach to understand your fitness better, and I'm always here to help.

Importance of consulting with a doctor

Do consult a doctor. Get a bunch of tests done - your blood work, your heart health etc. This will help you understand your current place, as well as dive deeper into any potential issues you have going on. Hopefully, there is not anything major, but safety is the priority.

Setting realistic fitness goals

While the actual answer is a lot of "it depends", let me recommend a few milestones and goals for you.

Your first major stop should be to

* be pain-free

* regain most, if not all, of your joint mobility

* be active for about ~150-200 minutes per week

Post that, you can start looking at what to do. Here are my recommended milestones:

* Goblet squat about 25% of your body weight for 10 reps

* Press about 20% of your body weight for 10 reps/arm

* Walk for 60 minutes at a brisk pace

* Walk up 10 flights of stairs

* Touch your toes with your knees locked

If you can do all these, amazing! Post this, we can start looking at things like Zone 2 training, interval training, strength training and power work and all that jazz.

A sample training plan

Here's a plan for 8 weeks that will show improvements in your joint health, and in your base strength and conditioning levels.

Strength-A

Do 3 sets of 10 reps/side of:

* step-ups

* crawl

* banded glute bridges

Strength-B

Do 3 sets of 10 reps/side of:

* lateral step-ups

* pushups (find your right version)

* banded knee clam

Conditioning-A > Walk

Walk for 45 minutes.

In every session, your goal is to walk more distance than the previous session, in the same 45 minutes.

When you cannot increase distance, increase the time to a total of 60 minutes.

And when you are unable to cram more distance into this time, start wearing a backpack with 3-5 kilos of books in it.

Conditioning-B > Stairs

Set a timer for 30 minutes.

* Climb up one flight of stairs.

* Take 5 relaxed breaths.

* Climb up two flights of stairs.

* Take 10 relaxed breaths.

* Climb up three flights of stairs.

* Walk back down 6 flights of stairs.

* Breathe, chill, and repeat when your breathing is back to normal.

Note down how many total flights of stairs you are climbing in 30 minutes.

When your heart rate does not climb up much and the 1-2-3 becomes too easy, change it to 2-3-5.

When that becomes too easy, well done!

How to use this plan?

* Monday: Strength-A

* Tuesday: Conditioning-A

* Wednesday: Rest

* Thursday: Strength-B

* Friday: Conditioning-B

* Saturday: Rest

* Sunday: Rest

You can do more. Or you can do less. Find a number that's repeatable every week and every month.

Other lifestyle DOs

This is an article that focuses on the activity part of it. But nothing is complete without a minimum focus on our lifestyle.

* Sleep (at least) 7 hours.

* Eat vegetables. Eat protein. Drink water.

* Don't work too much.

Staying motivated and overcoming obstacles

Are you ready to crush your fitness goals and overcome any obstacle that comes your way? Let me tell you, it's not going to be a walk in the park. You'll stumble and slip up, but don't worry, it's all part of the process. The key is to stay motivated and consistent.

Listen, it's not about how many times you hit the gym per week or for how long. It's about being active consistently over time. Trust me, being active 3 times a week for a year is worth more than 6 times a week for 6 months.

But let's be real, sometimes things get complicated. That's when you need to simplify and put in the effort. And if you need some inspiration, talk to someone who has been there before.

At The Quad, I've worked with countless people who have started or restarted their fitness journey after 40. And let me tell you, it's possible and it's fun! All you have to do is show up and do it your way.

Conclusion

You can get fit at any age.

You can get started at any time.

Sensible fitness training will add immensely to your quality of life.

Don't hesitate. Get started. Do it your way!

And good luck.

Here’s a short list summarising everything you need to know:

* You need to sleep 7-9 hours every night.

* A short nap during the day is a great idea too. Explore Yoga Nidra.

* Avoid 

* caffeine after 2 pm, as it can impair the process of you falling asleep.

* exercise just before bed.

* Eating too close to bedtime.

* Screens for 1 hour before bedtime.

* Do

* Get sunlight as soon as you wake up.

* Get some form of activity daily.

* Breathing drills or stretching, or a focused time to relax during the evening, to unwind from the day.

The Science of Sleep: Understanding the Sleep Cycle

Sleep is not merely a passive state where our bodies are at rest. It is a complex and dynamic process that affects our physical and mental health in numerous ways. Sleep can be broadly divided into two main stages: non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep and rapid eye movement (REM) sleep. During NREM sleep, our bodies undergo essential recovery processes, while REM sleep is associated with dreaming and the consolidation of memories.

NREM Sleep: The Foundation of Physical Recovery

When we first fall asleep, we enter the NREM sleep stage. This stage is further divided into three phases, ranging from light to deep sleep. During this time, our bodies undergo crucial recovery processes, such as tissue repair, muscle growth, and the release of growth hormones. NREM sleep is vital for maintaining our physical health and ensuring that our bodies function optimally.

REM Sleep: The Realm of Dreams and Memory Consolidation

Following NREM sleep, we enter the REM sleep stage, characterised by rapid eye movements and vivid dreams. During this phase, our brains are highly active, consolidating memories and processing information from the day. REM sleep plays a significant role in our cognitive abilities, emotional regulation, and overall mental health.

The Impact of Sleep on Mental Health

Sleep is not only essential for our physical well-being but also for maintaining our mental health. Lack of sleep or poor-quality sleep can lead to various mental health issues, including stress, anxiety, depression, and mood disorders.

Sleep and Stress Management

Adequate sleep is crucial for managing stress levels. When we sleep, our bodies produce lower amounts of stress hormones, such as cortisol. This allows us to better cope with daily stressors and maintain a balanced emotional state. Conversely, a lack of sleep can lead to increased stress levels, negatively affecting our overall mental health.

Sleep and Emotional Regulation

The quality of our sleep also impacts our emotional well-being. During REM sleep, our brains process and regulate emotions, allowing us to maintain a healthy emotional balance. Insufficient or poor-quality sleep can disrupt this process, leading to heightened emotional responses, mood swings, and increased irritability.

The Role of Sleep in Physical Health

Sleep plays a critical role in various aspects of our physical health, including the immune system, metabolism, and cardiovascular health. Prioritising sleep can significantly improve overall health and well-being.

Sleep and Immune System Function

Adequate sleep is vital for the proper functioning of our immune system. During sleep, our bodies produce vital immune cells that help fight off infections and diseases. A lack of sleep can weaken our immune system, making us more susceptible to illnesses such as the common cold or more severe conditions.

Sleep and Metabolism

Sleep is also essential for maintaining a healthy metabolism. Studies have shown that inadequate sleep can lead to hormonal imbalances, increased hunger, and cravings for unhealthy foods, contributing to weight gain and obesity. Ensuring a good night's sleep can help regulate our metabolism and maintain a healthy weight.

Stress eating is on the rise and a good night’s sleep is the most underrated fix.

Sleep and Cardiovascular Health

Our cardiovascular system also benefits from a good night's sleep. During NREM sleep, our blood pressure and heart rate decrease, allowing our hearts to rest and recover. Conversely, insufficient sleep has been linked to an increased risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, and stroke.

How Much Sleep is Enough?

The amount of sleep each person needs varies depending on factors such as age, lifestyle, and individual differences. However, general guidelines suggest that adults should aim for 7-9 hours of sleep per night, while children and teenagers require more (~10 hours) sleep to support their growth and development.

The Importance of Sleep Quality

In addition to the quantity of sleep, the quality of sleep is equally important. High-quality sleep allows us to progress through the various sleep stages, ensuring that our bodies and minds receive the full benefits of sleep. Factors that can affect sleep quality include sleep environment, sleep schedule, and lifestyle choices.

Sleep Environment

Creating a conducive sleep environment is crucial for achieving high-quality sleep. This includes maintaining a comfortable temperature, reducing noise and light levels, and investing in a comfortable mattress and pillows.

Your action items to improve your sleep environment include:

* sleeping in a coldish temperature.

* maintaining a quiet environment with zero noise.

* zero external light. I tape up my AC’s LED if needed.

* a great mattress. You spend about a third of your life here - find one that’s amazing.

Sleep Schedule

Maintaining a consistent sleep schedule is essential for regulating our internal body clocks, or circadian rhythms. Going to bed and waking up at the same time daily can help improve sleep quality and ensure that we receive the full benefits of sleep.

Additionally, as soon as you wake up, get out and get some sunlight. This helps with the circadian rhythm and all that jazz.

Lifestyle Choices

Our lifestyle choices can significantly impact sleep quality. Factors such as caffeine consumption, screen time, and alcohol intake can disrupt our sleep patterns and make it difficult to achieve restful sleep. Making conscious decisions to prioritise sleep and minimise these disruptions can lead to improved sleep quality.

Action items here include:

* No coffee after 2 pm. Caffeine stays in your body for a long time and to improve the quality and quantity of your sleep, stop caffeine at least 8-10 hours before bed time. I’ve written more about this over here.

* Avoid heavy and/or late dinner. If you eat and immediately go to bed, that can disrupt your sleep or reduce the quality. Aim to have a couple of hours gap between eating and going to bed.

* No screens. For the last hour before bed, do something else except using a digital product with a screen.

* No white lights. Switch them all out for yellow lights.

* Do some breathing drills before going to bed. If there’s only one change you will do, this is the one.

The Detrimental Effects of Modern Lifestyle on Sleep

Our modern lifestyle often poses challenges to achieving adequate and high-quality sleep. The demands of work, social obligations, and the constant presence of screens can wreak havoc on our sleep patterns.

Busyness and Sleep Deprivation

The pressure to be constantly productive can lead to sleep deprivation, as we sacrifice sleep to meet deadlines or complete tasks. However, this can be counterproductive, as inadequate sleep impairs cognitive function and negatively impacts our overall health and well-being.

Screens and Sleep Disruption

The prevalence of screens in our daily lives can also disrupt our sleep. Exposure to blue light from screens can interfere with our natural sleep-wake cycles, making it difficult to fall asleep and achieve restful sleep. Limiting screen time, especially before bedtime, can help improve sleep quality.

Alcohol, Caffeine, and Sleep Disturbances

Consumption of alcohol and caffeine can also negatively impact sleep. While alcohol may initially induce drowsiness, it can disrupt sleep patterns and lead to poor-quality sleep. Caffeine, a stimulant, can make it difficult to fall asleep and stay asleep. Moderating the intake of these substances can help improve sleep quality and overall health.

Prioritising Sleep for Better Health and Well-being

Sleep is an essential aspect of our lives that should not be underestimated. By understanding the importance of sleep and making conscious efforts to prioritise it in our daily lives, we can significantly improve our physical and mental health, enhance our cognitive abilities, and lead happier, healthier lives.

In conclusion, sleep is a vital component of our overall well-being that is often underrated and overlooked. By prioritising sleep, making lifestyle adjustments, and ensuring a conducive sleep environment, we can reap the numerous benefits that sleep has to offer.

Remember, sleep is not a luxury but a necessity for a healthy and fulfilling life.

There are a lot of simple actions you can take. Start tonight!

Further reading and exploring:

* Matt Walker’s book.

* Andrew Huberman’s podcast - he has many episodes on sleep.

* Matt Walker’s 1 hour conversation on TED.

* Matt Walker’s “Sleep is your superpower” TED talk.

It does not matter if you haven't exercised in decades.

It doesn't matter if you are carrying a lot of weight.

It doesn't matter if it seems impossible.

It doesn't matter if everyone else is fitter than you.

The only thing you need is intent.

If you have the intent to do this, you will get there. It is that simple.

When do you need it by?

For you to have a deep intent, you need to have a WHY.

Do you have one? Do you know yours?

You don't need it at the start, although it helps.

Plateaus

You definitely need to find it before the honeymoon phase is over.

When you find start seeing results, the snowball starts to get bigger and bigger. But trust me, results dry up. Especially at the pace you want them. When that happens, you lose motivation and stop. To not allow that to happen, you need to find your reason before.

Here's a video we shared with our student community on the importance of plateaus.

Plateaus are inevitable. They are part and parcel of your fitness journey. But because we don't expect them, because we lack intent, we get disillusioned. That doesn't happen if you have the intent.

Your new mindset

Once you have the intent, the deeper purpose, the drive in you that simply will not go away, everything becomes simple.

Not easy.

But definitely simple.

Consistency is no longer eluding you. You miss a day, it doesn't matter. Because you know you will make it tomorrow. Or later this evening. You miss a week because of a crazy spell at work - no problem. You still stretch in the evenings to wind down and you get back to routine next week.

You have the longer term view. You know slow and steady wins the race.

With intent, your mindset shifts.

Inevitable

You will become fit.

What does that mean - you tell me. You write down where you want to be at. That's the destination. Physically, write it down on a piece of paper.

In fact, have it written and framed. Use it.

So, you will know when you get there.

Also, estimate the time to get there. Ask an expert to guide you on this.

As long as you have your intent, and your reason, there will be no stopping you.

And once you get there, celebrate. And write out a new destination. Immediately!

The Problem with Start-Stop Workout Routines

Starting and stopping a workout routine repeatedly can lead to several issues:

* Loss of progress: When you take long breaks from your fitness routine, your body loses the strength and endurance it gained during the training period.

* Difficulty in regaining momentum: Restarting a workout routine after a long break can be challenging, both physically and mentally. It might take considerable effort to regain lost strength and endurance.

* Increased risk of injury: Jumping back into a workout routine can lead to an injury. You are anxious/annoyed about taking a break and want to get back to where you were. So, you rush it a bit. Or you lift weights at your previous level, rather than easing back in. This leads to injuries and further setbacks.

Benefits of Year-Round Strength Training

Consistent strength training offers numerous benefits:

* Improved muscle strength and endurance: Regular strength training helps increase muscle mass, making everyday tasks easier to perform.

* Enhanced bone density: Strength training stimulates bone growth, reducing the risk of osteoporosis and fractures.

* Better body composition: Consistent strength training can help reduce body fat and increase lean muscle mass, leading to improved overall fitness.

* Increased metabolism: Strength training boosts your metabolism, allowing you to burn more calories even when you're not exercising.

* Increased confidence: Strength training does wonders for your mental mindset and self-image.

* Change in mindset: When you dabble, when you are in a stop-start mode, you tend to think of yourself as someone who is bad at fitness. As if there's such a thing. Working out regularly helps you shift out of your mentality and identity. You think of yourself as someone who is active. And so, you are active.

* Improved skill: Strength is a skill. Endurance is a form of strength expressed over long durations. Doing a new movement, like a pistol squat, is an advanced motor skill. All of them are skills that require you to work in a consistent manner. You will find your skills improving during the reasonable periods of training.

Sustainable Workout Habits

Developing sustainable workout habits involves finding the right balance between intensity and consistency. This requires an understanding of when and how to incorporate different types of workouts into your routine.

The media confuses and distracts us in this regard. It shows a lot of tough and intense workouts alone. That leads to flawed thinking. That this is the only way to get results. And if you don't get results in that short timeframe, you suck. But that's completely false.

Let's take two scenarios.

You are newly in love and hanging out with your partner. When you meet, you are not going anywhere in particular. If you are going on a long drive, the point is to spend time together. The destination does not matter. How fast you get there does not matter. The two of you are lost in each other's presence and enjoying the conversation, the drive, the unhurried nature, the lack of a real destination, and the lack of pressure. The entire episode is enjoyable. Being stuck in traffic is irrelevant. If the place you were going to doesn't work out, going to another place is equally fine. As the joy is in getting time together. Let's call this the honeymoon drive.

Contrast this with an important work meeting with your biggest client. You have a specific time and place to be at. Where you are going matters and when you get there matters. You plan everything in advance. If plane tickets need to be booked, they are booked. The cab ride to the airport needs to be arranged. The cab ride at the destination as well, airport to the client's office - arranged. Nothing is left to chance. Let's call this the business drive.

Reasonable Workouts: The 'Honeymoon Drive'

Reasonable workouts form the foundation of sustainable fitness training. These workouts are:

* Manageable and realistic: They should fit into your daily schedule without causing excessive stress or disrupting other aspects of your life.

* Progressive: Your workout routine should gradually increase in intensity and volume, allowing your body to adapt and grow stronger over time.

* Enjoyable: Choose activities that you enjoy, as this will make it easier to maintain consistency and stay motivated.

* No pressure: There's no pressure to get anywhere. The goals are effort-based only. As long as you show up and do your best, you are good. You lift the weights that are reasonable for that day.

* 85%: You live in the 85% zone. Slowly, your old 85% becomes your new 75%. What I mean is you find that it takes less effort to do the same work you were doing earlier.

* Results/Destination is irrelevant: While metrics and benchmarks are important, you are not ruled by them. You benchmark when you need to. But you are simply enjoying the time you are spending on yourself and your training.

Intense Workouts: The 'Business Drive'

Periods of stress are when you grow. A challenge requires you to step up beyond your current level and reach a new level. As Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi talks about in his seminal work, we need to find the right level of challenge. Too easy and you don't grow. Too tough, and you give up.

Intense workouts serve as an extra stimulus for growth and progress. They should be incorporated into your routine periodically when your body is ready for the additional challenge. Remember, you've been slowly and steadily working at the 85% zone. And after a few months of it, your 85% is now 75%. Logic dictates that your 100% has gone up. But to lock that in, we need to find that new 100% - which we do by making a push.

These workouts are:

* Challenging: Intense workouts should push you beyond your comfort zone, demanding extra effort and focus. Remember, you are going to surpass your previous best. You've set the base for it but unless you actually lift the heavy weights, your body isn't there yet.

* Goal-oriented: Use intense workouts to target specific fitness goals, such as breaking through a plateau or preparing for a competition. In strength training, it might be a specific number for a specific lift.

* Timed appropriately: Schedule intense workouts during periods when you can dedicate time to proper recovery and nutrition.

* Short bursts: You do these for 6-8 weeks at a time. Immediately after, you have a longer recovery period and then go back to the reasonable method of working out.

Creating a Year-Round Workout Plan

A well-rounded workout plan should include a mix of reasonable and intense workouts.

What happens when you are mired in deliverables every week of the year? When do you get to de-stress? And take time off? You start hating the job. You start phoning it in. Or your life suffers. The hustle culture that is permeating society has permeated our fitness training as well.

You intuitively understand that you need the weekend, the vacations, and also low periods at work. How can your approach to strength training be any different?

A side question might arise - can you be on the honeymoon drive for even longer periods? Absolutely. But the business drive is necessary. You need to lift the heavy weight to get your muscles and tendons and ligaments and nervous system used to it. To nail the gains in.

Here's a suggested structure:

* Plan your workout calendar: Break down your year into months and allocate weeks for reasonable and intense workouts, ensuring there's ample time for recovery.

* Have a clear workout plan: Select exercises and activities that align with your fitness goals and preferences.

* Monitor progress: Track your performance and adjust your plan as needed to continue making progress.

For example, here's a way you can structure your year.

* Jan and Feb: 'Business Drive'

* March, April, May, June: 'Honeymoon Drive'

* July 1 to Aug 15: 'Business Drive'

* Aug 16 to Oct 15: 'Honeymoon Drive'

* Oct 16 to Nov 15: 'Business Drive'

* Nov 16 to Dec 31: 'Honeymoon Drive'

You've spent about 14 weeks doing challenging work and 38 weeks doing reasonable work.

Importance of Rest and Recovery

Rest and recovery are crucial for sustainable fitness training. Ensure you:

* Schedule rest days: Include at least two rest days per week to allow your body to recover and repair.

* Prioritise sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night, as sleep plays a vital role in muscle recovery and overall health.

* Incorporate active recovery: Engage in low-intensity activities such as stretching, yoga, or walking on your rest days to promote blood flow and recovery.

* Don't forget nutrition: Adequate protein, vegetables, and water.

Accountability and Motivation for Year-Round Fitness

Maintaining motivation and accountability throughout the year can be challenging. Consider implementing the following strategies:

* Set effort-based goals: You know I am not a big fan of only looking at results. Set effort-based goals instead. For the 38 weeks of reasonable training, are you able to average 3 per week? Were you able to hit 110 sessions for the year? And then the 14 weeks of tough might be 4 sessions a week. Whatever your plan says.

* Seek support: A coach does wonders. So does a community. Find one or both.

* Celebrate your achievements: Acknowledge and reward yourself for reaching milestones and accomplishing your goals.

* Find the right metrics to measure and benchmark.

* The right workout plan for intense periods: To get to a specific goal, you need focus. If your goal is to improve your bench press, then you need a plan that delivers just that. And then, you need to keep the plan the plan. And not randomly switch around.

* The right plan for the honeymoon: While the honeymoon period is relaxed and enjoyable, it does not mean random. You need a plan that tells you to keep doing the reasonable things. You need to work on your skills, rather than arbitrarily switching around.

Conclusion

Year-round strength training is a sustainable approach to achieving long-term fitness goals. By finding the right balance between intensity and consistency, prioritising proper nutrition and recovery, and maintaining motivation and accountability, you can build a strong foundation for a lifetime of fitness and health. Embrace the 'honeymoon' and 'business' approaches to create a workout routine that works for you and enjoy the journey towards a fitter, healthier you.

Note: Coach Dan John's essay on the park bench and bus bench workouts has shaped my training. This article is built on my experiences over the past decade of implementing that important concept.

But instead of reacting (or stopping there), you can use these experiences as opportunities for growth and self-improvement. By observing and analyzing the actions of others, you can learn valuable lessons about yourself. And develop better strategies for navigating similar situations in the future.

Observing Without Judgment

The Power of Observation

The first step in learning from poor actions is to observe without judgment. This is harder than it sounds.

In fact, what might happen is your internal reaction of like or dislike. Sure, you have already judged and that's okay. Now, you can file this away as something that rubbed you in the wrong fashion. Something to take note of.

And then recognising that everyone makes mistakes. It's important to separate the action from the person. By focusing on the behaviour rather than the individual, you can gain a clearer understanding of what went wrong and why it happened.

And what you'd like to do in that situation.

Emotional Distance

It's important to maintain emotional distance when observing poor actions. This allows you to objectively assess the situation without being influenced by your feelings or biases. Of course, when you are involved in the situation, it might be more challenging to maintain this emotional distance. Which is why you end up saying or doing silly things that you regret. However, by stepping back and viewing the situation as an outsider, you can gain valuable insights into how you might react in similar circumstances.

And thus, the best place to learn it is in situations where you are the outsider.

Identifying the Lesson

What Not to Do

One of the primary lessons to be learned from observing poor actions is understanding what not to do in a given situation. By witnessing the negative consequences of someone else's behaviour, you can identify the pitfalls to avoid when faced with similar challenges. This knowledge can then be used to inform your own decision-making processes.

Empathy and Compassion

When you witness someone making a poor decision or engaging in negative behaviour, it can also serve as a reminder to practice empathy and compassion. By putting yourself in their shoes and considering the factors that may have contributed to their actions, you can better understand their motivations and struggles. This can help you develop greater tolerance and compassion for others.

And towards you when you inevitably f**k up.

Self-Reflection and Personal Growth

Examining Our Own Reactions

Besides to observing the actions of others, it's essential to take a closer look at your own reactions to their behaviour. Your emotional responses can provide valuable insights into your own values, beliefs, and areas for growth.

For example, if you find yourself becoming upset or judgmental when witnessing someone else's mistake, it may be an sign that you need to work on your own ability to forgive and let go. And/or you are guilty of a similar mistake, which is why it rankles more.

Identifying Areas for Improvement

By analyzing your reactions to the poor actions of others, you can also identify areas in your own life where you may need to make changes or improvements. For example, if you find yourself irritated by others who display a lack of organization or time management skills, it may be a sign that you need to work on developing those skills yourself.

For me, every time I coach someone on their training or nutrition, I learn a lot about what I can add to my personal journey. Because I learn from their behaviour or difficulty, and what my recommendation would be. And I'd see where I am being too critical of my own behaviour. As well as where I am making fundamental errors and being blind to them.

Applying the Lessons Learned

Notes for Future Situations

Once you have identified the lessons to be learned from observing poor actions, it's important to make a mental note of these insights so that you can apply them in future situations.

I like to go one better and write these down in my journal. By keeping these lessons in mind, you can be better prepared to navigate similar challenges and make more informed decisions.

It might seem crude or a*****e-ish to note down other people's bad behaviour, instead of your own. That's not what I mean here.

Your imperfect behaviour could be in a blind spot of yours. Which might make it hard for you to capture in the immediate aftermath.

It is far easier to capture what grates you about an action you see. And then dig deeper into the why and what, and write a lesson for yourself.

Practising Mindfulness and Self-Awareness

To effectively apply the lessons learned from observing poor actions, it's essential to practice mindfulness and self-awareness. By staying present and aware of your emotions, thoughts, and actions, you can more easily recognize when we're faced with a situation that calls for the application of these lessons. This heightened awareness can help you make better choices and avoid falling into the same traps as those you have observed.

For me, a lot of this happens only after the fact. Almost all of this happens when I put myself in the right space and read my journals.

But thanks to my regular practice of mindfulness meditation, I have become more self-aware of the feelings that arise when I have these reflexive negative reactions. And as often as possible, I attempt to log it in. Previously, I would be critical of the other person. Or critical of myself for being critical of the other person.

Encouraging Positive Change in Others

Leading by Example

One of the most effective ways to encourage positive change in others is by leading by example. By demonstrating the positive behaviours and decision-making strategies that you've learned through your observations, you can inspire those around us to follow suit.

This affirms your change in behaviours as well. Coupled with a truly non-judgmental attitude, you can truly inspire the others around you. Because your actions do speak loudly.

Offering Support and Guidance

When appropriate, you can also offer support and guidance to those who may be struggling with their own poor actions. By sharing your insights and experiences, you can help others recognize the negative consequences of their behaviour and encourage them to make positive changes.

And that's my reason for writing this post.

With mindfulness meditation and therapy, there is a lot of difficult stuff to wade through. And one of them was how judgmental I can get. How I seem to have an opinion on a lot of things that others do. And how that was neither helping me nor them.

The deeper problem was I am exponentially more judgmental of myself.But because these are reflexive and faster than I can process, I am often left with the downstream thoughts and feelings without an understanding of what led to them.

Which meant there was no way for me to treat myself with empathy or understanding.

To change, I need to change how I treat myself. And that's been the work I've started to do.

Conclusion: Embracing the Opportunity for Growth

Learning from the poor actions of others presents a unique opportunity for personal growth and self-improvement. By observing without judgment, identifying the lessons to be learned, and applying these insights in our own lives, we can become better equipped to navigate the challenges we face and foster positive change in ourselves and those around us.

So the next time you witness a negative behaviour or poor decision, remember to ask yourself, "What can I learn from this?" and use the experience as an opportunity for growth.

You are going to brush your teeth for a long time to come.

You are going to shower for a long time to come.

These are not surprising revelations, even though we cannot predict what the future holds in a decade or more.

As you are also aware, your powers diminish with age. Your physical and cognitive powers decline. And yet, we are not approaching our health and fitness and lifestyle as things we will need to work on for a long time to come.

Sounds obvious, right?

To fight the good fight, to not allow them to diminish, a healthy lifestyle is mandatory. For how long? Well, for however long you want to live.

Short-termism

In the world of fitness and nutrition, there's a common case of short-term thinking. We're all guilty of it, folks. It's a result of our limited mental capacity to process the necessary changes, combined with the chaos of our daily lives. And let's not forget the endless stream of good and bad advice floating around.

The end result? A classic case of "I'll give it a go for a month or two". Whether it's a new diet, exercise routine, or even trying to get some shut-eye at a reasonable hour - we've all been there.

Sure, some of us manage to stick with it. But let's face it, most of us fall short. And the real issue? Our mindset. We're not in it for the long haul, folks. We're looking for a quick fix.

So, let's change that narrative. Let's experiment with our habits and routines but with a focus on the long term. No more quick fixes only. But a wise concoction of short-term bursts with longer term maintenance and plateaus.

Urgent and Important

We all know the struggle of trying to balance everything in life. It's like trying to juggle flaming swords while riding a unicycle on a tightrope. Not exactly a walk in the park. We think we can do it all, but let's be real, something's gotta give. And unfortunately, it's usually our health, relationships, and sanity that end up taking the hit.

So, what do we do when the "Urgent and Important" things start piling up? We shove the "Not Urgent and Important" to the side like a forgotten toy in the corner of a child's room. But let's not forget, that neglecting those important things can have serious consequences for our future selves.

Now, I've learned a thing or two from my students. They're like little Zen masters, showing up and doing the work without complaining or questioning the plan. And guess what? It works! They're not only getting stronger physically, but they're also seeing improvements in other areas of their lives. Who knew that consistent effort could actually lead to positive outcomes?

From my recent past, I've tried meditating and journaling. And let me tell you, I didn't sprout a halo or anything. The changes were subtle, but I did notice that whenever I stopped these practices (oh, no halo yet?! This is not working) off, my performance and life suffered.

And it's not just me! My students at The Quad feel the same way. When they skip out on the community, the positive vibes, and the hard work, things start to go south.

But here's the kicker: this stuff should be obvious! I mean, you're an expert in your field, right? But when it comes to health, fitness, and nutrition, people don't get it.

So, how long do you need to work on yourself? Well, for as long as you want to be healthy and happy! It's like investing or marriage - you gotta keep putting in the effort if you want to see results.

Not measurable

Making changes can be as slow as a turtle on a lazy day. Some of us hit the jackpot and get a boost of motivation that lasts for months or even years. But for the rest of us, it feels like we're pushing a giant boulder uphill forever.

Sure, some things like how much you can lift or how much you weigh are easy to track, but they eventually hit a wall. The real game-changers are the subtle shifts that happen over time. If we're not paying attention, we'll miss them completely!

For me and my students, the only sign that we're slacking off is when our routine is disrupted. That's when we know we need to get back on track and keep pushing forward.

85%

Hey, listen up folks! I've got a revolutionary idea that will change the game for ya! How about we switch our mindset and approach? It's simple, really. The magic number is 85%. Yup, you heard me right. Just get things right 85% of the time, or get 85% of the things right.

And while you're at it, focus on the big rocks, not the little pebbles. Trust me, it's gonna make your life a whole lot easier.

Fractals

Most weeks should follow the pattern. You sleep reasonably well, you eat reasonably well, you train with a park-bench style approach, and you balance the work-life.

Sometimes you zoom in and your day follows the pattern.

Sometimes you zoom out and your month follows the pattern, but the days - not so much.

That's fine. That's how it will be.

One day at a time.

One week at a time.

But stop waiting for The End

Listen up folks, I'm not suggesting you stick to the same boring routine till the end of time. That's only for the chosen ones, you know, the unicorns among us. As for me, I've tried running (for a mere 6 months), then moved on to lifting barbells (2 years of that), and now I've been hooked on kettlebells for over a decade. And if I take a step back and look at the big picture, I've been enjoying my fitness journey for the past 15 years, by doing things 85% right.

Similarly, I've experimented with being vegan, vegetarian, and paleo, and now I've got a little bit of everything with a touch of intuitive eating, and voila! I'm nailing about 85% of what I think is "healthy eating" with minimal friction.

I mean, let's be real, I'm all about optimising my health, but I'm not about to give up on life. So, for the rest of my life, I'll keep doing what works best for me.

What's next?

Okay, so let me break it down for you in a way that won't scare you off. You don't have to wait for a pat on the back to feel accomplished. Those hard-core fitness and nutrition programs might give you some quick results, but they require a level of discipline that's almost inhuman.

The real deal is the 85% you can maintain for the rest of your life.

Some weeks, hardcore. Some weeks, vacation. But most of the time, 85%.

Now, if you're wondering whether you can keep up with this routine for the rest of your life, don't worry, not everything has to be a lifelong commitment. But when it comes to your health, you better believe that's a forever kind of thing.

Taking care of your body is no laughing matter!

Let's optimise for health while allowing for life. For the rest of our lives.

So, let's talk about addictions and distractions. And no, I'm not just talking about the obvious ones like cigarettes and junk food (although we all know those are bad for us). I'm talking about those sneaky little habits that we don't even realise we have. You know, the ones that seem harmless but somehow manage to suck away hours of our day.

I recently made the switch to wearing my founder hat more and my coach hat less. And let me tell you, figuring out what the heck my job even was took up a lot of my time. And don't even get me started on the never-ending vortex that is my email inbox.

Productivity tools

To get my act together, I started looking into different frameworks for improving my productivity. My favourite? The Eisenhower Matrix. It's a powerful framework that tells you how to prioritise. Are you focusing on tasks that are urgent and important only? Are you forever postponing Important tasks? Are you not delegating less important tasks?

Combined with some time logging - literally logging what I was doing in 15 minute chunks - I was able to see obvious gaps. Lo and behold, I was leaking time like a sieve! So, I tried to be productive and plug those leaks, but it left me feeling drained and annoyed.

And don't even get me started on my productivity techniques - they seemed to only make matters worse. I was spending all my time on urgent and important tasks, but did they need to be done? It took me months to even question that!

Paradigm shift

Thank goodness for Oliver Burkeman and his amazing book. It was like he reached into my brain and put words to all the things I couldn't quite articulate. I felt so grateful and relieved! He talks about how there will always be too much to do, but somehow that's actually liberating. You don't have to beat yourself up for not doing it all - that's not possible. Instead, make a shift from trying not to neglect anything to proactively tackling what matters. How's that for a productivity hack?

So, I had to let go of my obsession with being a productivity guru and started looking at things a bit differently. I mean, why waste time on leakages when they don't add anything to your life, right?

My "trivial" time sinks

Let me give you some juicy details about the addictions and distractions I'm talking about:

First up, we have Reddit - the OG of internet time-wasting. I used to spend hours on this bad boy. And don't even get me started on all those other sites that used to suck my time away when I was living it up in Silicon Valley.

Then there's football - I mean, how many times can you check the scores/news on different sites in a day? I've got it down to a science now, with five sites to choose from, each one reserved for a specific time of day. I know, I know - I'm a genius.

Last but not least, we have the default news on my phone browser. I mean, I thought I had eradicated reading news. But thanks to the sneaky design of technology, I found myself casually scrolling through Google News on my phone browser.

So get this, without even realising (thanks to my trusty time log), I was wasting a few precious minutes every few hours on some total non-work stuff. And let me tell ya, emails are the worst culprits of all. They make you feel productive but in reality, they're a shitty piece of fuckery. But wait, there's more! There are other time suckers too, but I won't bore you with the details. Altogether, they add up to about 30 minutes of my day. That doesn't sound like much, right?! Wrong.

The bigger cost

But do you know what the real problem is? The fact that I'm always running away from discomfort and seeking distractions. The break in thought and flow! Getting back into the swing of things will take a few minutes. And the next time I am stuck, the odds of me running away to a distraction are a tad higher. And some days, I don't get any work done at all.

So instead of trying to plug those gaps with more work, I've decided to instead sit.

That way, I can focus on what matters and make the most of my time.

There are gonna be more tasks on my to-do list than I can shake a stick at. But here's the kicker, I'm not trying to replace those pesky distractions with "productive tasks." Nah, I'm trying to sit with the discomfort and not get sidetracked.

But don't get me wrong, I still need my distractions. I mean, have you seen the news lately? It's like a never-ending cycle of doom and gloom. So, instead of subjecting myself to that, I've broadened my horizons. I'm talking cute puppy stuff on /r/aww, people!

And when I need a break from my break, I'll do a quick breathing exercise or stretch it out. Not all the time, mind you, but enough to keep me focused and not annoyed when I do get sidetracked.

Your turn

So, take it from me, use your distractions wisely and you'll be cranking out top-notch work in no time.

It starts with awareness. So, what are those pesky addictions and distractions that pull you away from being your best self?

With a lot going on, it is easy to get distracted by "doing".

As a chronic overthinker, it is difficult to know if I am caught up in the midst of overthinking. Or if I am coasting.

Spending time writing is an outlet for me to probe deeper. I use this medium, and my journals to write.

And the warning signs are when I avoid doing things I'd like to be doing. If my daily journals start showing gaps (as they are over the past month), or if my articles start to feel more disjointed.

The curse of the busy

It is easy to be busy nowadays. It is not the bane of only a few people but a curse that strikes all. It is easy to coast, and not realise you are coasting.

It is easy to lose work-life balance. In fact, almost everyone I speak with seems to be dabbling in this.

And especially with emails, it is easy to fool oneself into thinking you had a productive day. Even though almost everyone who got sucked into the email sinkhole ends that day feeling "Did I actually do anything?"

What the heck is checking in?!

Checking in with myself was a concept I was unaware of.

I didn't know that I needed to do this.

I didn't pay attention to how I felt.

I didn't pay attention to what my baseline was. I didn't correlate mood drops, sugar cravings, a desire to be alone, a need to vegetate etc with what was going on in my life.

In a simple environment, such as going to the gym, listening to your body is important. Based on what your body (and mind) are telling you, you decide if today's a day to keep it light or go heavier than planned. For 80% of the days, you stick to the plan. But to catch the outliers, you pay attention.

This concept applies to the rest of life as well. I'll share two places where I've found checking in with myself to be of great significance.

#1: Low on energy and motivation at the end of the day

I have a tendency to not pay attention to my energy levels or to check in on how I am doing and feeling. I behave in a grumpy fashion because of this. But I will be unaware that the grumpiness is a direct consequence of being emotionally or mentally or physically drained.

Having a daily check-in, at the end of my workday, has been useful. I have a simple routine, akin to brushing my teeth, that helps me reset.

First, a shower. As soon as I come back home, having a cold shower allows me to transition and start the check-in process.

Post that, doing some gentle movements and resets dramatically alters how I feel physically. Which spills over a bit.

Post that, ideally, I will do some pranayama followed by some Vipassana meditation.

I do not get around to all of them but I know they make me feel better. I  might not reclaim most of my energy but I would've lost my grumpiness. I end up feeling calmer and in a better state.

This leaves me in a much better state to do whatever is next. Whether that is to read or hang out with my wife or go see a couple of friends, or vegetate in front of the TV. Too much TV also means that my recovery is not adequate i.e. I need to take a couple of days off.

Note: This is not a judgment on watching TV. This is my personal learning that when I watch too much TV, it means I need to figure out why.

#2 Waist, sugar cravings, and motivation to lift

I am not perturbed by the weigh scale. Most of my daily habits are dialled in that I keep my waist-to-height ratio under the safe limit of 0.5.

It is not easy to do this. I am not blessed genetically. For example, my buddy who trains with about the same regularity as me but pays no attention to what he eats has a much better body composition than I do. But that's how it is.

I can (and periodically) undo a lot of the work that I put in at the gym and the kitchen. When stress levels get high, I don't recognise the drop in motivation.

Or put in the increased time for recovery. Or see that my cravings are going up. While I do use the Daily9 system over the longer term, it is easy to avoid looking at it when I know things are going the wrong way.

Over time and repeated ups and downs, I have come up with a few guidelines. The big one is to keep my waist between 71 and 79 cm. The daily habits I focus on are

* eating (at least) 2 cups of protein and 2 cups of vegetables

* being active 5 days a week

* sleeping well

And when I find my waist trending on the higher side, I know it is time to take a closer look.

When I stop doing the daily stuff - which tends to happen around the same time the waist starts to go up - I know I need to pause for a bit longer. And zoom out and see what's going on.

Most often, the problems are related to work-life balance, not doing my daily check-ins, not seeing what energises me (or drains me).

My guidelines

Nothing is as isolated as it seems. While how my mood is, and how crazy work is might seem unrelated to each other and how consistently I am going to the gym - you are one. Your mind and body are one, and insanely complex at that.

What I've found is the better I am at listening to myself and doing this, the better I am as a person to be with and around.

What I do are:

* Basic evening routine - shower, resets.

* Daily energy check-in, at the end of the day

* Regular journal writing

* Daily D9/D3 logging, to keep a long-term view of my habits

And ensure I do enough things that add energy. For example,

* date night, once a week

* catch up with friends, once a week

* stretch / mobilise

* lift weights

* meditate / breathing

I am not a fan of tracking. But it is a simple and necessary task that's required. It is impossible to know how things are going if you don't have a system in place.

To me, the daily and weekly checks let me know if I am doing the bare minimum that I know I need.

Every time I find the balance, and I do these things, I find my life spiralling upwards.

Every time I stop these actions and I lose track, I find my life spiralling downwards. When that happens, I tell myself to begin again. It gets easier every time to catch myself earlier and begin again.

Finding out the right questions to ask yourself can change how you lead your life.

For me, one of those is "How do I feel?" and checking in with myself. Especially because this was an alien concept. For you, it could be something else.

Not other people's thoughts.

Not their opinions.

Not their methods.

Not how "it is supposed to be done."

Not other people's benchmarks.

Not "This is how everyone does it."

What matters is what makes you happy.

Not other people's vacations.

Not other people's toys.

Not how they spend their time.

But what brings you fulfilment.

What matters is your purpose.

If you want to run a small tuition centre for ten children? In the world of billion-dollar online education platforms, are you thinking too small? Or are you naive? Or are you wasting your time?

Are those even the right questions to be asking?

What matters are your beliefs.

Being surrounded by noise, it is hard to differentiate your thoughts from other people's thoughts.

When you lose your compass and your clarity, you will never get there. Wherever that is.

What matters is you listen to yourself.

And that's the hard part.

How does one reconcile the contradictions?

If you want to redefine how kids' education is done, is it fine to work with only 10 kids? Is that the moral thing to do? Or is it your responsibility to spread the word to the masses?

Or in my case, I know I have the right tools to teach long-term health and fitness. But does that mean I have to teach it to 1 million people? Is it a failure if I don't? There's no one right answer.

I am coming to the frightening realisation that every answer that I look for - in books, in mentors, in deconstructing the actions of much smarter people - is already inside me.

I have to look inside.

Not outside.

A prompt

What kind of questions are you struggling with?

What are you searching for outside of you?

As attention spans reduce, reading books seems to be incongruent with the times. If you are a reader, you might know most of the guidelines below and I'd love to hear about any guidelines you might have. And my unsolved problem.

If you are someone who's been wanting to kickstart a reading habit, I am sure these will help you off to a running start.

#1: You don't have to finish the book

I learned this only a few years ago. I have wasted many hours finishing books that I should not have. Out of some weird sense of obligation to the author. What?!?!

Only a few years ago did I give myself permission to stop. If a book doesn't capture my attention in the first 30-50 pages, I put it away. Yes, it might be a classic or whatever, but it is not for me.

Some books should be tasted, some devoured, but only a few should be chewed and digested thoroughly.Sir Francis Bacon

#2: There is such a thing as "the right time" for a book

You look forward to reading a book. You start it. But it doesn't click. You are forcing it. Not that the book is boring but it is simply not happening.

There is such a thing as "the right time". Your mindset, your energy, what you are currently looking for, where you are in life - everything plays a role. Put the book away. It is there in your head. At a later time, you'll feel it and you will go to that book.

A lot of the books that I don't go past the initial 30 pages fall into this category.

I dispose of the terrible books.

#3: Skim

Read the table of contents. Get an idea for the construction of the book.

Skim the book. Jump around. Skip ahead. Go back. There's no "one method" to do this.

#4: Understand the context in which it was written

You cannot read a book that's 300 years old and berate it for having certain old-fashioned ideas and notions. Or a book is written in a completely different social/political/cultural context.

You need to know who the author was, where they were when they wrote it, what the cultural snapshot of the times was, what recent historical events happened around them, and a bunch of other contextual stuff.

Only then will you understand the book.

#5: Don't be put off by things you disagree with

Even if you understand the context, there's no way you will agree with everything the author has to say. That's absolutely fine.

As Bruce Lee says,

Absorb what is useful, discard what is useless and add what is specifically your own.

#6: You agree with a book because it is a deeper truth within you

The books that resonate the most will feel as if the author reached into your brain and wrote what you felt in the most perfect way possible.

The best books… are those that tell you what you know already.George Orwell

#7: Do your research

Your time is precious. Don't read random stuff.

Look it up on Good Reads. Get recommendations. You will have (at least) one friend who reads more than you. See what and who they are reading. If you are the biggest reader you know, time to move up the chain - be part of a reading community.

Don't worry about reading books that you should be reading.

Read what speaks to you.

#8: F**k this nonsense of "I read 52 books last year."

Who the f**k cares?

Why the f**k are you counting?

Don't be put off by those people. You read at your pace. You read how many ever you want to.

In the case of good books, the point is not to see how many of them you can get through, but rather how many can get through to you.Mortimer J. Adler

#9: Read fast or slow?

I read fast.

But I'll come to a place where I need to pause for a day or a week.

Or some books, I cannot put them down.

I tend to forget and lose track - so, I aim to finish a book within a certain time.

Most books, I do not finish. Not because they suck but because it is not the right time. I've read a quarter of it and skimmed through the rest. It will come to my head later when the context presents itself.

You read at the pace that works for you. But I will say this - skim first. Even if you are going to read the book but not a deep reading, skimming has value. This is not a suspense thriller for you to not spoil the ending.

In fact, read the table of contents, the intro and the last chapter to see if it is worth it.

#10: Three bullets

Many books do not need a second reading.

You can summarise the book in three bullets. For example, a friend of mine did it brilliantly for The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life.

"I don't know where I'm going, but I know exactly how to get there"

The journey to transformation is a series of first steps, and so, be invested in discovery rather than an outcome.

Recognize the first steps by the aliveness they bring out in you.

That's it. It is a beautiful book and story. But anytime I need to remember the lessons from it, these 3 bullets are all I need to remember.

The reading is necessary. Again, I am old school. I am not a fan of book summaries and such. There are many reasons that a book speaks to you - the author's voice, their stories, their structure, their trials. These help you contextualise and spark your brain in tangents.

In that fashion, you figure out the three bullets. Your own summary.

#11: A deeper reading

Not every book warrants it. Some books are glorified blog posts. Some books have a rhythm and story to them that helps you understand the meaning better. As long as you note it down and what it means to you, you are good.

A few books require a deeper reading.

Summarise each chapter in your words, in your context. Write down "things I need to do" etc

Write down your learnings.

I scribble notes and thoughts on the margins.

#12: Re-read every year.

Some books speak to you. They are books that you will end up re-reading approximately once a year. Every new reading will reveal a new nugget. As you change, as you evolve, your understanding of the book evolves.

If you would tell me the heart of a man, tell me not what he reads, but what he rereads.Francois Mauriac

To close it out

Reading is a joy. It is a habit you can pick up today.

While I had this habit, I did lose it for a couple of years as I got busy with work and life. As always, begin again.

And of course, if you are a serious reader, you should check out How to Read a Book by Mortimer Adler.

The one thing I struggle with is taking notes. While I write in the margins and I note things down in my journal, I do not have a good system for it. Do you have solutions/suggestions for this?

Nothing wrong with that. They reflect where you are today. Based on what you know and have experienced so far.

But what happens for a lot of you is that you stick with these convictions blindly. Because you made them earlier. You said it out loud. A part of this is how your brain works. It has learned a pattern and does not need to keep wondering what the appropriate response is. A red light means stop. A green light means go. And so on.

But your brain is capable of learning more information. You might meet different people with vastly different experiences than you. You will learn many other perspectives. Which should cause you to revisit your various camps and opinions. Not because you were wrong. But because you have a lot more information than before.

It doesn't change or reduce the validity of what you believed earlier. What's sillier? To believe/do something you no longer agree with because it is embarrassing/uncomfortable to have a new stance? Or to have a new stance that reflects who you are today?

For example, I grew up in a vegetarian household in Madras.

Going to visit my dad's village opened up my world quite a bit.

Having friends whose upbringing was quite different from mine, eating at their homes and spending time with them opened it up even more.

Going to grad school opened it up even more.

And all this kept adding to my context. Continuing to parrot what I had committed to when I was younger doesn't make any sense.

That was what I believed when I knew what I did. This is what I believe today based on what I now know, as part of the journey.

Changing your mind happens all the time. And it is a good thing. You've been taught to stay consistent. You've been asked questions when you contradict your earlier opinions. To avoid complications, you feel it is simpler to stay with what you started off with.

It depends.

Often, that might be true. In some other cases, it will not be true. With new information, you should question earlier stances. Post that, if you still choose to stay with the same opinion - that's great. You've evaluated the information, rather than ignoring it.

Changing your mind is a good thing.

You are not the same person you were 10 years ago. Heck, 10 days ago.

Change is the only constant.

Be true to yourself. Follow your intuition. Question everything. Including your stances.

In today’s post, I want to talk to you about how and why you should focus on general fitness.

And you will learn why The Quad got its name ;)

Ambidextrous

Unless you are ambidextrous, one hand of yours is stronger than the other. Way stronger. It is capable of multiple tasks at a higher skill level. Putting food into your mouth, brushing your teeth, beating eggs for an omelette - there is a discernible difference between how your dominant arm does it versus the non-dominant arm.

This is not news to you. This imbalance exists in your body, along with many others. And none of them affects you. Until they do. For example, when you overuse/overdo a movement, you get pain. Tennis elbow, when the outer part of your elbow hurts, is an overuse injury. Commonly happens when one plays tennis but can happen to non-players as well from mundane activities.

It is a pain in the ass to write with both hands, not to add that it is unnecessary. But if one hand does 100% of the work in everything and the other does nothing, that's a problem. And that's not the case - you use your non-dominant hand quite a bit.

In fitness, let's expand this from left and right to more attributes you need to pay attention to. To find balance. Not to equalise all of them.

Can run 21k but cannot finish a workout

About 15 years ago, I ran a half-marathon. That's about 21 km - a mind-boggling accomplishment for me, considering I could not run 500 metres a few months prior.

Thanks to the running community, I was able to go from there to something insane - running for 2+ hours.

I was not "unfit" anymore.

Or so I thought.

Then, I went to a CrossFit workout. And I could not last the warmup. I could not finish a full workout until 3 months later. Even though I could run 21 km. I couldn't understand it at all.

3 months later, when I was able to last the full hour in my workouts, I was still pulling my back and doing mundane things around the house. What?!?! Was I not fit?

I needed to understand more.

Fitness is the ability to perform a task.

When I was running, I was fit to run for an hour and cover about 10 km in that hour. Before that, I was not fit to run for 2 minutes.

Being fit to run was not the same as being fit to do a CrossFit workout. Even though there were overlaps, there were a lot of gaps in what that fitness required. Versus what fitness I had.

And even after I was fit to hold my own in a CrossFit class, I was not fit to avoid pulling my back arbitrarily.

You and I want to be able to do a variety of things. Do them to some level of competence. We need general fitness and not just fitness to do a few specific tasks. Why - we are not specialists.

Neeraj Chopra needs to be fit for one task - to throw the javelin far. Anything that does not add to that is irrelevant to his fitness. In his sphere of performance, at the world-class level, that's the focus.

For the rest of us, we want the ability to do a wide variety of tasks reasonably well. I introduced the concept of General Physical Preparedness (GPP) earlier.

Why did I struggle at CrossFit even though I could run 21k? Why did I keep pulling my back even after I was good at CrossFit?

Because of gaps in my GPP.

The blockers

There are 3 primary reasons why you don't think about being well-rounded in your fitness.

* Not having the time for it. If you are someone who has time for fitness, you don't have MORE time for fitness. You are going walking/running/cycling/yoga etc. and cannot add to it. Fair enough.

* Identifying yourself in a box. If you do have the time for it, you do more of what you are already doing. Because you identify yourself as that. I was a CrossFitter - I wouldn't do yoga and I was done with running. You either think it is irrelevant or unnecessary or taboo to do other things.

* Not having the framework for it. When I lifted barbells and was focusing on strength, I could've worked on other aspects of my GPP that would not clash with strength. When I was CrossFitting, I didn't know I could work on my absolute strength.

Let's chip away at each one.

Not having the time for your physical wellness - you need to create time. You are a smart individual. You know you need some form of physical activity in your life. How you make the time for it is a logistical question that you need to solve.

Identifying yourself as a strength athlete or an endurance athlete. Working on other skills will be complementary to your training. It will not pull you down but boost you up.

In the Quad community, we have quite a few folks who are ardent runners. They run multiple times a week. And they travel for a race, at least once a year. One runner who finished a full marathon a couple of weeks ago shaved 80 minutes (EIGHTY) off his previous time. That means they ran every kilometre of the race almost 2 minutes faster. That's a ridiculous betterment. And a small part can be attributed to our coaches who worked on complementary aspects of our student's GPP.

Not having the framework for it. Well, you've already made progress towards that. And we'll chip away a bit more in the next bit of this post.

Strength - Speed - Endurance - Mobility

The four attributes that I'd like you to focus on are:

* Strength

* Speed / Power

* Endurance / Stamina

* Mobility / Joint health / Flexibility

Now, you can dig into each of these and blow them up into many slices. For example, endurance can be broken down based on the energy system - aerobic, glycolytic, and alactic. And each of those can be further broken down - for example, aerobic power, aerobic capacity etc.

We will not be doing that. The focus today is to start building a better framework and mental model about what and why general fitness is the way to go.

And yes, there's agility and balance and more and more things. Yes, they matter. But no, I am not including them here.

I will use myself as an example.

Stage 1: Start

When I started my ultimately successful attempt to improve my physical health and wellness, I couldn't touch my toes. I couldn't run 500 metres. I couldn't lift much weight. I was, however, able to run 100 metres or so rather fast. Let's plot my QUAD.

Don't get too caught up with the numerical values. The story they tell you is accurate - the actual quantity/method to arrive at the metric is irrelevant.

Stage 2: After yoga

I was able to touch my toes. An improvement in my mobility.

So, my mobility component increases a bit.

Stage 3: after 21k

I have completed a 21k in ~2 hours. An insane improvement in my endurance. Let's see how that looks.

You can already see a huge improvement in my GPP from where I started, right?

Stage 4 and 5: CrossFit, followed by strength training.

For brevity's sake, I combining these two. With CrossFit, my strength increased a bit, my endurance increased a bit, my speed/power increased a bit.

After that, I spent a few months working on my absolute strength. As you can see that it is easily my biggest gap.

Stage 6: The Quad Method, and today

By 2011, Raj and I had a working system. We adapted our learnings and created the first version of our method.

And today, after more than a decade of working using that method, here's how things stand.

Strength is the foundation. Everything else springs from it. The ultimate goal is to keep chipping away at the gaps.

A note: At The Quad, we have benchmark workouts and assessments to calculate the score for the 4 attributes. The results of these are put into a formula that takes into account age, gender etc., to arrive at a QUAD.

What next?

Remember, fitness is the ability to perform a task.

And you do NOT need to hyper-specialise here.

If you are looking for general fitness, you are looking to create a QUAD that's as close to a square as possible. This means all the attributes are balanced.

If you are an amateur endurance athlete, you can work on the complementary aspects of speed, mobility, and strength. While endurance will always be your biggest strength (no pun intended), your QUAD area should be high. And this will result in improved running performance.

If you are a fitness aficionado, your first step is to get as close to a square as possible. And then you can work on increasing the size of your QUAD. More area = higher levels of fitness.

As always, remember, enough is enough. At some point, stop with the "more" game. A good-sized QUAD will ensure you look great, feel great, and play your recreational sports at a high level, and your sphere of outside activities will increase. Meaning, you can take up new challenges every year. Hike up to base camp. Work towards a triathlon. Enter a lifting competition. Your foundation is amazing and you can take brief forays into fun things.

Tada!

In today’s article, I am taking the clickbait route. That doesn’t mean it is not true.

Let’s focus on eating lesser by hacking mindful eating.

Eat better. Duh.

For long-term health and wellness, you cannot eat (a lot of) junk foods. You already know this.

For long-term health and well-being, you need to eat vegetables and protein. You already know this as well.

But diets fail. Because you go too drastic with the changes. You miss your favourite foods. Your deprivation makes you go overboard. Your weight yo-yos.

So, instead of telling you to make any changes in your diet, how about you learn about other changes you can make? And impact your health for the better.

There are two simple principles to impact your health - eat better and eat lesser.

Why should you eat lesser?

Who says you are overeating?

Because we have access to a lot of easy calories i.e. low in nutrients but high in energy, most of us end up consuming more energy than we need. Your body needs a certain amount of calories.

To use a car analogy, if you drive your car 50 kilometres daily and it uses 5 litres - that's the amount of fuel it needs daily. Likewise, your body utilises about the same amount of energy daily. Of course, if you run a marathon today and are sitting on the couch tomorrow, the energy consumed is big. But on average, you get what I am saying.

An extra serving of rice versus an extra serving of cabbage, for example, is ~200 calories versus ~20 calories. It is easy to eat more rice than cabbage, I am sure you agree.

And that's what happens. We end up eating these easy foods a bit more than we think. Because they are easy to consume. And when we enter the realm of a pizza or a doughnut, those are even more loaded with calories.

So, back to the point - I'll help you eat lesser. This doesn't mean you will starve. Instead, it means you will eat the amount you need rather than overeat without knowing.

Eat less versus eat better is not either-or. You will need to do both. And they dovetail really well.

Reframing the question

The question I framed myself during the pandemic, as I had a lot of time to think and experiment - "If I cannot tell you to eat better, how can I help you?" And here's one huge part of my coaching solution.

It still requires work. It is not easy. Because you cannot keep doing everything you are doing and expect a different result. Obviously.

How to eat your meals

Mindful eating is a simple but far-out concept that seems plausible for Zen gurus and not folks like you and me. Except it is. I am going to teach you how to hack mindful eating.

* Use a smaller-than-usual plate. Not too much smaller but let's say 80% of your current plate's size.

* Serve yourself your first serving only. For example, if you normally eat 3 rotis, do NOT serve yourself 3 rotis. Serve yourself 2. Or even better, serve yourself 1.

* Now, set a timer for 15 minutes. And once you switch the timer on, put your phone away.

* You will go for your second serving only when the timer goes.

Now, on to the actual eating.

* Once you put the morsel into your mouth, chew.

* Chew a lot more than you normally do.

* Pay attention to the chewing.

* Count the number of times you chew. If you are in the high-20s, you are doing fine.

And while you are chewing,

* keep your hands off your plate.

* stop making the next morsel.

Once you swallow,

* speak to whoever is around you. One short sentence.

* Or take a breath. One relaxed inhale and exhale.

Now, prepare the next morsel.

And finally, remember - all that food in front of you is NOT going to disappear. You do NOT have to eat all of it. You will be able to eat it next week. This is not your last pizza ever. So, don’t behave as if it is.

That's it!

How does this impact your health?

* Chewing more will lead to better digestion of your foods. You will feel less bloated and gassy.

* Chewing more will mean you take more time to eat your meals, rather than rushing.

* Coupled with not preparing your next morsel, you will eat slower.

* The timer is a backup device. Eating slowly will ensure that your stomach will send the "I am full" signal to your brain before you eat your second and third servings.

* You will eat the right amount that you need. Additional calories of any sort get stored as fat tissue.

* You will not overeat and feel bloated and full.

* You will not feel fatigued immediately after a meal. You will feel more energetic.

* Mild calorie restriction is healthy.

A side note about mindful eating. The actual practice of mindful eating requires you to not do anything else except eat. No TV, no books, no conversation. Instead, you are mindful of your food. You pay attention to the food, to your action of eating and chewing. You pay attention to the nuances in taste. You start to realise what magic had to happen for you to get that food. From the sun and the rains and soil to people you will never meet working to get that food to your plate. But that's a different mindset. Until I attended a Vipassana retreat, I never felt the awesomeness of this practice.

As I mentioned, let's hack it a bit to get some of the benefits of it to immediately impact your health.

So, follow these simple rules and see your health impacted in a few days. And when you are ready, add eating better and eating earlier and your effects compound!

And that’s it from me. If you made it this far, let me know if you have any questions or suggestions for what you’d like me to write about.

We are celebrating Sports Day at The Quad today, after a long hiatus. A good portion of our community comes together to train and have fun. It is always a blast and a special day for all of us.

I thought I’d discuss two reasons that often crop up on the topic of strength training. I certainly had the second one stall me for a few years. And the first time I got injured, I was s**t scared. But how about we dig a bit deeper?

The two biggest fear factors I hear about strength training are:

* The fear of getting big and bulky.

* The fear of injuries.

Let's talk about both of them.

Getting big and bulky

Let's start with what strength training is not.

It is not bodybuilding. It is not big, bulky muscle. And yes, it is possible to be immensely strong without looking like that mental image you have of "that's what a person going to the gym looks like."

More often than not, you will put on muscle when you lift heavy weights. But let's get this straight - putting on muscle is not easy. It requires a lot of literal hard work. Plus a good diet and sleep. And that's to put on muscle - not to look big and beefy. A kilo of muscle does not take up much space.

If you put on 5% of your body weight as muscle and lost 5% of your body weight as fat, you will look leaner and stronger. Let's say you weigh 100 kilos. 5 kilos of fat is lost, which takes up a lot more space than 5 kilos of muscle. Your weight doesn't change but your body composition changes quite drastically.

But if for whatever reason you are averse to putting on too much muscle, you can train around it. But you need not because (a) it is not that easy to put on muscle and (b) muscle is good for you.

But because we are inundated with hoardings and photos of big, beefy muscles, we wrongly assume that is the end goal. Nope.

Nervous system + musculoskeletal system

Strength training involves using any form of resistance - your body weight, an external load like a barbell or kettlebell - to train your nervous system and subsequently your musculoskeletal system to get stronger.

It is not only a hardware upgrade.

It is a software upgrade AND a hardware upgrade.

When you lift weights, your nervous system needs to send the right signals to the right muscles to lift them. The reason you are not able to lift weights beyond a specific point is your nervous system hasn't been asked to recruit the necessary workers before this. That's why, with sensible strength training and progressive overload, you can lift loads that you couldn't in a matter of weeks. And without getting bigger or heavier.

Because the software learns to use more of the existing hardware.

Women vs men

It is harder for women to get big muscles. Because of how our hormones work. It is relatively easier for men - but it is still a lot of hard work.

The common expression of looking toned requires you to strength train. You want to look leaner and more muscular. You want to lose fat while putting on muscle.

The solution is strength training with a reasonable diet. That way, you put on muscle, you lose body fat and without bothering about the weighing scale, you look completely different.

Injuries

Injuries happen. Not gonna lie or sugarcoat this.

I tweaked my back last Monday while doing some kettlebell snatches. Something I've been doing three days a week for the past 14 months as part of my training. And I've been out all week. I've been in pain and now progressing into severe discomfort.

This is not the first time as well. I've pulled my back three times. And each time, it takes me one week to get pain-free. And one month before I can get back to training.

Three times in 15 years. And I've probably had 3 other injuries over this period from training. That's 6 times in about 3000 training sessions or 0.2%. And all 6 happened because I broke one of my guidelines below.

Not bad at all. Of course, this is n=1.

Injuries happen when:

* the technique is poor.

* warmup and/or cool down is insufficient.

* not fully focused on the training.

* not using the right muscles due to other injuries and compensations.

* training too hard and not taking enough time off.

* bad luck.

Strength training, over the long term, will reduce the chances of injuries happening. For that to happen, you need to focus on great technique. You need to do a proper warmup. You need to stretch. You need to stay mentally focused - makes sense to do so while swinging a heavy kettlebell or lifting a heavy barbell.

And as you put in the quality effort, your body knits itself together to move better.

What's next?

Muscle is gold. The older we get, the harder it is to put on muscle.

Muscle helps with better metabolism, injury prevention, with anti-ageing. It helps you look better and feel better.

Strength training increases your bone density. It increases your resilience to injury and mishaps.

Strength training makes you stronger, inside and out.

Don't let the false notion of "I'll get big and bulky" put you off.

On injuries, it is a more legitimate concern. Sheer probability i.e. you are going to lift weights more often than the average person makes so.

But please remember, there are 100s of instances where your strength training would've built you up, made you resilient. And you won't get injured at all, or as seriously as you might have otherwise. Since those are never things we can count on, we hear the stories of the injuries only.

And injuries and pulled backs and all that happens, whether you strength train or not. Our posture. Our weak muscles. These cause a lot more injuries than lifting weights.

I hope you will think twice if one of the two reasons above has been a limiting factor.

Add strength training to your life. It can do wonders.

And that’s it for today. Let me know what you think.

I had to miss last Sunday due to a personal emergency. Apologies that I could not give a heads up on time.

For this week, I want to discuss self-kindness and energy levels. My personal journey has been around this in the recent past and I thought I’d share.

On a side note, I had an interesting opportunity recently - to make a presentation in under 3 minutes. It was a fascinating experience and got me to stick to the crux of communicating something.

Why energy matters

The amount of energy you have at the start and end of your day determines a lot.

How creative are you going to be?

Your motivation. Are you going to go to the gym? Are you going to stay focused during the meeting? How productive are you going to be?

Your mood. Are you going to be cheerful and open? Are you going to listen, or are you going to react? How patient are you going to be in your interactions with co-workers and family? How patient and kind are you going to be with yourself, when things are not going to plan?

Your willpower. Are you going to reach for that piece of candy?

While the goal can be to always do your best, that varies each day. And it is also affected by the previous task(s). If you did something mentally draining, the next task might see your "best" drop. Especially if that is another task that requires a lot out of you.

Your morning ritual

Some days, you wake up not feeling that motivated.

Some days, you jump out of bed and are ready to go.

Almost all days, you have work that needs completion. I am not referring only to "office work" but anything that needs your time, energy, and attention.

A morning ritual goes a long way in getting you settled and finding your groove, especially on those days when motivation is low. In a workout, the warmup serves the same function. Not only does it warm up your muscles and gets your joints moving, it is diagnostic for you to figure out what kinda day you are having.

Based on the information and feedback, you can decide if today's the kinda day to attempt to lift heavy, or punch the clock and go home.

Likewise, certain low-energy days might not be the best time to work on something important. Remember, important things should be scheduled well in advance and given a bigger window to work. And more often than not, a ritual plus the advance notice has allowed your brain to work on it already. On rare occasions, you might not be ready. If you have a high fever, not the day to be pushing yourself.

Not straightforward

Of course, it is not straightforward. How do you know the difference between being lazy and being kind? Well, this is amongst the hardest questions for me.

How do you know if you need to sit at the task until the task is done versus taking a break?

Coming back to the heuristic of "Am I doing my best?", coupled with "Am I being kind to myself?" has been something I have spent the better part of last year working on.

My big goal is self-kindness.

And some days, the best thing I could be doing is taking the day off. Choosing NOT to work on the work scheduled for that day.

When I started working with my therapist, one of the concerns I raised about my style of work was the self-criticism involved. But I was also reluctant to shelve it. If I didn't occasionally wield the whip, what would stop me from vegetating on the couch all day?!?! This blog post is NOT going to edit and publish on a Sunday morning, is it?!?

Well, funnily, it does (barring unexpected emergencies like last weekend.)

Numerous examples have shown me that I am not going to run away. I am not going to vegetate on the couch for the rest of the week. I will show up to my scheduled meetings and complete the work I've committed to. This means it is a good idea to shelve the irrational and unkind thoughts associated with not feeling great.

Quality reps

How many quality reps can you do? In life and in training, you need to do the work and you need to do your best all the time. Junk reps do not do anything useful. Junk reps do not produce forward motion.

When I choose to skip a (work) rep, that counts as a self-kindness rep. Why - I am listening to my body, to my energy, to my emotions. And giving myself permission to stop.

Previously, it would be associated with guilt. Or self-criticism. Or all of the above. While completing the task. Thus, I have often completed the work but nowhere close to my best. Coupled with not feeling good at the end of it, mentally.

Being aware = a better me

Paying attention to my body and my energy has been useful for me - in the quality of work, and in the quality of my interactions with friends and family.

For example, being aware of my grumpiness after a draining work. Previously, I would be in a bad mood and it would be impossible to pull words from my mouth. But a combination of awareness and having an evening ritual has made all the difference.

I've found one or more of the following to get me out of my funk when I have days like these.

* Breathing drills.

* Meditation.

* OS Resets.

* A 45-minute stretching session.

* And of course, the occasional evening of being a sloth.

Honestly, the last one is the least impactful. The other methods leave me better off than where I started. While my energy levels might not be replenished, the bad effects of the energy drain are removed. And I find myself in a much better frame of mind. I might still not be ready to head out and hang out with friends but I am not a grumpy goose anymore.

Understanding my energy levels, paying attention it, and then setting my "best" for the day has made a big difference. It has led to the larger goal of self-kindness be more effective. Instead of having an absolute mark for my best, understanding that it is relative has made it possible to be okay with different levels of output.

What about you? Is this something that bothers you at all? Or if not, you have a natural way of solving this. Can you dig deeper to look at how you do. I, for one, would love to hear about it.

As my workload keeps piling up, my thoughts keep leading me to thoughts of too much intensity, of not saying no enough, of attempting to do too much.

Before we begin, here are some articles you might enjoy.

On totalitarianism — a form of government in which the state has no limits in authority and does whatever it wants.

The Players Tribune is a place for some great, direct writing from athletes, present and retired. Here’s Andriy Shevchenko writing last year when the war started. War in 2022?!?! How the f**k are we still here?!?!

And tangentially related to my article below, a short clip by Geoffrey West who wrote Scale.

Intensity vs Consistency

Intensity is important. Without intensity, without that drive, that hustle, that push - it does not seem possible to get things done. To get over that hump, that last mile, to solve that roadblock - you need intensity. And to start, to blast off. Like a rocket that needs to escape the Earth's gravitational field.

Consistency is important. Compounding happens only with consistency. Long-term success and outcomes need consistency.

It doesn't need to be one or the other, right? Why OR when we can say AND?

Burnout

Well, true. In many many situations, you are mistaken when you think it is A or B. But not here.

The obvious answer is to be consistently intense. Right?

Well, if you want to burn out, yes.

Balancing the intensity required, the work-life balance needed, the switching off - this is becoming hard to do. There is always more to be done. And it needs to be done ASAP. Let's push it now, and once this is over, you will chill.

But something else comes up. Always.

Burnout is an increasingly common scenario. And unfortunately, across many age groups.

A lesson from workouts

In a high-intensity workout, your heart rate goes to 90% of its maximum. It is supposed to. That's how you get the requisite outcome and adaptation.

You push it. And then you rest. For example, you sprint 100 metres. After that, you need to take a few minutes to rest. Sometimes up to 10 minutes. Before you can sprint again at the same intensity.

There are workouts where you rest much lesser and go again. You are putting in the same effort but with incomplete recovery. This leads to a different adaptation and is a valid training protocol. Your sprint speed will drop and that's expected.

As a strength and conditioning coach, I write training plans that vary the outcomes and adaptations produced by my students. For example:

* Sometimes, it is high intensity with a lot of rest. Sprinting with 5-10 minutes rest.

* Other times, it is high intensity with incomplete recovery. Sprinting with 2-3 minutes rest.

* High (ish) intensity with incomplete recovery. Running fast but longer - 400 metres - with 2 minutes rest.

* Moderate intensity for a much longer duration. Running for 30-90 minutes.

* Low intensity. Walking non-stop for 60-120 minutes.

All are valid training protocols (there are many more) and all produce different adaptations.

All need you to rest and recover. Some have recovery built-in. All have a recovery that's needed over the rest of the day and the next, sometimes even the next few days.

Sleeping, eating, and stretching to name a few of the expected recovery work that one needs to do.

Sprinting with inadequate rest and recovery

Sprinting with inadequate recovery leads to reduced performance. And if you do not rest enough before your next sprint session, you will eventually injure yourself. You think a cheetah can sprint 10 kilometres?!

But that's exactly what you are doing in life.

You keep sprinting. Every night and every weekend, you gasp for air and attempt to de-stress and recover.

But you keep adding piles and piles of stress and workload on us. And you keep doing this with incomplete recovery.

Your health drops.

Your performance drops.

Your peace drops.

You fall sick.

You feel rushed.

You feel anxious.

Change is needed

You need to change your mindset and your approach.

There are times when you need to bring in a lot of intensity. But you need to add in a lot of high-quality rest and rejuvenation at the end of that period.

You need consistency. You need to keep showing up. Most days, you come in and you do your best. Some days, that means you clock in - your workout, your work, whatever. Some days, you suck. You take it easy. And some days, you BRING IT!

Life is a mixture of all these. Training (life at the gym) is a mixture of all these.

You need to learn this fact. And you need to design your schedule accordingly. Chartered accountants, for example, should have a vacation in April, once the tax craziness of March wraps up. App developers should do this after a product/app launch.

What's next?

If you do not programme the rest and recovery, we will break.

If you aim to be consistently intense, you will break.

Consistency is the overarching framework that will hold everything together. You need to be consistent. For the rest of your life.

You bring intensity in short bursts.

A few simple examples of how this can play out in our lives are listed below.

Daily

* Stretching

* Breathing drills

* Meditation

Weekly

* hanging out with friends

* seeing a movie

* reading a book

* playing sport

* getting a massage

Monthly

* taking a long weekend off and chilling

* Working on your hobby

Quarterly-Yearly

* Vacations!

My opinion is consistently being intense is a surefire method to fall sick and decrease quality of life and work. What's yours?

That’s it for this week. I’d love to hear back from you, if you have any thoughts or opinions.

This week’s episode is about my learnings from listening to (and reading) Diana Chapman’s work. She’s an executive coach and advisor to leaders of large organisations.

In addition to two of her interviews, a few other things that caught my eye, before we get into the main piece.

* Diana’s conversation with Shane Parrish. Listening to this for the second time (and I will certainly give it a few more listens) sparked this post.

* Diana’s conversation with Tim Ferriss.

* I started watching Stutz on Netflix, thanks to a recommendation from a student. We were chatting about therapy and coaching and what-not, and while I am not done with it, I have 7 pages of notes. Check it out if you are into documentaries and/or interested in your mental health. You’ll hear more about this from me in a few weeks, once I am done watching it fully and it sinks in and does its thing.

A few things before we start:

* I am paraphrasing and interpreting their conversation through my lens. So, any misattribution/misinterpretation is completely mine.

* Like everyone, I find it easier to listen to people on my wavelength. Meaning both Shane Parrish and Diana Chapman say/view things that are cohesive with my sense of the universe.

With that out of the way, let's do this.

The drama triangle

When s**t goes wrong, it feels natural to play the victim. Oh, why does this kinda stuff keep happening to me? If only I could catch a break. Why am I not losing the weight I gained over 7 years after dieting for two whole weeks?! Why does this happen to me?! The feeling of disempowerment is the primary one associated here.

You know the drill. You've been there.

The next actor in our personal drama tends to be the villain. This is the character who keeps playing the blame game. It is your fault, it is their fault, if only you had more willpower or better genes.

Like most of you, I was familiar with these two actors. What was surprising to me was the third - the hero. Not a term we'd associate with as a negative, right? In our lives, the hero plays the role of swooping in to rescue the situation. Temporarily!

I trained so hard at the gym today, I deserve the burger and chocolate milkshake. And gosh, it was such a hard day at work. I will vegetate on the couch and not do any of the chores because I deserve it. You play the hero to yourself. Or as I realised, you attempt to do it for other people. At work, when someone's struggling, many a time I've stepped in to rescue them and do their work for them. While this might appear to be a good thing, it is not. This is a band-aid and not something that helps me or them.

I am being a martyr for sacrificing my time and work to do their work. I am not valuing the other person’s intelligence or capacity to help themselves. I am meddling. When instead I should be giving them their time and space. And mentoring them to identify skill gaps and improvements - teach a person to fish and all that jazz.

Understanding this was uncomfortable. Realising I have done this on numerous was humbling.

In our professional and personal lives, we keep playing inside the drama triangle. We keep switching between one of these roles.

Being aware of this framework has been a revelation. Stepping back and observing this, and learning to step outside of the drama triangle has been powerful.

It is silly to expect 100% success, and I am nowhere close to even 50% success. But it is a game of reps. I have one more rep this month than I had all of last year. That's a great win!

Outcomes and egos

Do you want to be proven right? Or do you want to get the right outcome?

Many a time, you want to have the right idea. You want to be the genius who cooked something up and changed everything in your organisation. And as one of the founders of an organisation of two (back in 2010-11), approximately 50% of the ideas were mine. Which was a bad drug to inhale. It kept feeding the story that I needed to continue to come up with these kinda ideas and that was my role. It led to holding on to my ideas for too long, to not opening up and inviting others to shape the organisation.

We can all agree that we want to move forward. That we want to get to the right outcome. Many a time, what's standing in the way is our ego. We want to be the hero. We want to be right.

Learning this piece of the puzzle has been liberating. What I have done but can do a lot more of is to surround myself with people who kindly but firmly share their constructive feedback. And have more conversations with the dozens of crazy smart and successful people in my community.

And most importantly, listen to and invite my co-workers to actively build the organisation while I step back and learn. And participate in the process.

Facts and stories

I love this one!

There are facts. And there are stories.For example, the fact is I was speaking to my wife about a certain morning when went on a hike. And she picked up her phone and looked into it while "uh huh"ing along. The story I told myself was she's not interested in whatever I was saying, I was boring, and she's an a*****e for not listening.

Now, when I keep this story to myself, it builds up inside. It explodes a few days or weeks later. And during that time, it fortifies itself. It morphs into something else. It invites the drama triangle where I play victim and hero and my wife plays various villains.

Sheesh!

Instead, what if we nipped this in the bud. And spoke out loud about the story forming in our heads? I might find that my wife was looking up a photo of the day I was referring to and added a lot more details and colour to our conversation.

Learning to separate facts from stories is imperative. Hold on to your stories with curiosity. Your stories are your framings from your limited perspective. Many a time, your stories are triggered by implicit memories from childhood which you haven't addressed. By not realising that it is a story, by not sharing the story and dismantling it, we allow the story to become a fact. It is anything but fact.

What's next?

The 3 learnings are intertwined. Unwillingness to share a story is ego over the outcome. And then playing out the drama triangle in our heads.

For me, this is an invaluable addition to my framework/philosophy. And a crucial requirement is a sense of humour. Taking any of my actions seriously leads to not being able to step out of it. Observing my antics allows me to step back. A sense of humour allows me to get away from my previous reflex of self-criticism. And most of all, to move forward towards a better outcome.

I hope you found this spark in a few brain cells.

I encourage you to listen to her chat with Shane, as well as her conversation with Tim Ferriss. I had to keep it down to 3 (and not 17) to keep to the ~1000 word limit.

Keep chipping away. This Socrates fellow was on to something with his "Know Thyself" bit.

That’s it from me. You have a good one, and I’ll see you in February.

Today’s post is about stress eating.

Like most people, this is something that happens to me. Being aware of it has been a key first step. Acknowledging it has helped. And speaking about it has helped tremendously.

So, let’s chat, shall we?

Is stress eating real?

You've heard and experienced the term "stress eating." But is it factual? Or an excuse was given to indulge in unplanned gluttony?

The answer requires a short dip into the biochemical process that is your body. In the short-term, when stressed, the stress response curbs appetite. Why?

Because getting out of the stressful scenario is immediately relevant. You've seen this in action when you are working on an important project and have skipped a meal.

But the issue in modern life is that the stress does not go away, many a time.

From Harvard Health,

But if stress persists, it's a different story. The adrenal glands release another hormone called cortisol, and cortisol increases appetite and may also ramp up motivation in general, including the motivation to eat. Once a stressful episode is over, cortisol levels should fall, but if the stress doesn't go away — or if a person's stress response gets stuck in the "on" position — cortisol may stay elevated.

Increased appetite and increased motivation to eat. That's the end result.

Why do we stress eat?

To combat our stress, you crave that will make you feel better. You eat foods that are high in salt, sugar, and fat. Foods that are engineered to hit your brain with "Yaaaaaaay!" signals i.e. dampen the stress response.

You do this for the short-term but tomorrow, you need to hit it again. And the day after that. And the day after that.

That's how stress eating occurs.

Because the underlying cause is deeper and unresolved, it is not a question of willpower. But of biology. The best method to get out of stress eating is not to work on the eating component but on the stress component.

My current scenario

The past 8 weeks have been higher than usual on my stress scale. I am in the middle of a new app launch for the Daily9, a complete revamp of the application and a big change in how the programme is designed. While I prepared for this stressor, the consistent delay (5 months late) coupled with unexpected bugs led to my stress cup overflowing.

All this is besides my regular workload. Which has a different stressful component. I am finding it difficult to get out of working on Quadrant-1 tasks, and move into working on Quadrant-2 tasks. Note: from the Eisenhower matrix, Q1 tasks are Urgent and Important while Q2 tasks are Not Urgent and Important.

Understanding my stressors

For me to solve my stress problem, I need to understand them better. The D9 app launch is a short-term stressor. Once the app is launched and the bugs are resolved, it will get over. What I have learned from this experience is:

* have a weekly project review.

* do not accept that all development projects will be delayed. As humorous as the the following quote is.

The first 90 percent of the code accounts for the first 90 percent of the development time. The remaining 10 percent of the code accounts for the other 90 percent of the development time.

-- Tom Cargill, Bell Labs

* make peace with the fact that there will be unforeseen problems

* stay calm throughout the experience. Being calmer allows me to solve problems better. Being agitated delays the solution.

* reach out to experts earlier, even if it seems unnecessary.

And the other stressor which is persistent, working on Quadrant-1 tasks rather than Quadrant-2. Here's what I am thinking:

* First, I need to acknowledge that this is not going to be resolved in the next few weeks.

* I need to have more self-compassion. I am working hard and there are a lot of things at play at The Quad.

* I need to stay calm and draft a medium-term and long-term plan for how I am going to achieve this transition. I find planning rather hard (more on this in a few weeks) and I should seek outside help.

* I need to begin with the end in mind. Rather than yelling "I need to work only on Quadrant-2 tasks", I need to understand what that means.

* Continue to focus on my breathing, meditation, and me-time.

* Stay patient. Understand the effort required. Track the effort.

What's next?

Understanding my stressors, acknowledging them, and acknowledging my pain/difficulty is the crucial first step for me. These are not things I have ever done before.

Then, I need to work on the plan. A lot of the stuff I've said is abstract i.e. they need specifics to be laid out. But the skeleton is there. I've picked a direction. I need to walk down there and it will get clearer.

I need to keep an eye on my stress eating. Rather than get angry at the stress of eating, I need to use it as an opportunity. To acknowledge that things are getting hard. Use it as a flag, rather than as a whip. The flag lets me know that something's up.

The point of using me as an example is not to speak about myself. But to walk you through what is a potential solution. I don't know if this is the right solution for you. Heck, I don't know if it is the right solution for me. But I do know that most solutions appear when I start moving in the right direction.

Next time you find yourself stress-eating, here's my suggestion:

* focus on identifying the stressor.

* acknowledge the stress. acknowledge yourself.

* treat yourself with self-compassion.

* have a plan for dealing with the stress.

* give yourself time.

Hope this provides you a useful tool to tackle your own stress eating, whenever that rears up. I’ll update you on my learnings and progress and failures in a few weeks time.

Have a great week ahead!

I know you have bigger goals in mind and water might seem a trivial thing. But what I’ve realised is there are a lot of people who are not drinking enough water. And when that happens, bigger things will not take place.

It seems obvious but if it is, why are so many of us not figuring it out? Because it is not about knowing something obvious as “drink more water”. It is about how do you make it an invisible habit. The same principle applies to eating more vegetables, incorporating a fitness habit and well, almost anything.

Let’s start with water.

Not drinking enough water

You know you need to drink water. But you somehow end up not getting enough of it. It seems so simple and yet, why do you find yourself not hitting your water goal?

If you find yourself thirsty, it is an indicator that you are dehydrated. And based on my journals, this is true for me. And I thought it was only me - until I realised a lot of my students are facing the same issue.

Do you find yourselves thirsty?

Do you get headaches randomly?

Are you feeling tight and stiff?

Do you get random hunger pangs?

It could all be because you are dehydrated. Let's find out!

It seems trivial to say "drink X litres of water" and be done with it. But as with everything, the what is one tiny part of it. Integrating it as part of your daily routine is the real challenge.

How much to drink?

Let's start with the basics. You need anywhere from 2.5 to 4 litres of water. These are based on average adult sizes and depending on where you fall, be on that side of the spectrum.

I realise I am not getting enough water, even though I start my morning off with 500ml and then post my training session, another 500ml. By 9 am, I am done with 1/3rd of my goal. But I am not getting 2 litres in the next 12 hours. Simple and important to solve this.

Why is it complicated?

You end up not drinking adequate water because of how the workplace is.

* You are sitting in an air-conditioned environment for 90% of your day.

* You are not sweating much.

* You are not getting enough activity. Even if you are the type of person who exercises. How - because outside of your workout window, are you moving about?

* You are occupied with work and forget to drink water.

How do you go about fixing this?

First up, start the day with water. As soon as you wake up, drink a tall glass of water. You have not had water for the previous 6-8 hours, as you were sleeping. So, top up your water supply. Hot water is a great idea to help you wake up as well.

What used to work for me when I used to work at an office was the following:

* I'd fill up a glass of water (and not a water bottle.) A tall glass of water is a size that I can finish in 2-3 turns. A water bottle does not give me the signal that "I am done".

* As soon as the cup is empty, I would walk over to the water cooler. I'd take a circuitous route to it as well. This gave me a break from sitting - an added bonus.

* I'd fill the cup and come back to my desk.

* Ever so often, this would mandate a walk to the loo - more walking breaks. And another signal to fill the cup and keep drinking water.

Now, because I work from home, I am not doing this. When I have back-to-back meetings, I realise that I've spent many hours without moving much, and thus not drinking enough water. I've filled up a water bottle but because I don't finish the litre over 2-3 hours of sitting, I end up not knowing if I am getting enough water. And I do not get the gratification of finishing!

What I need to do is get back to my old routine.

Set an alarm and/or have a 5-minute gap between my meetings to drink water and take a bio-break. And get away from the water bottle to a tall cup.

All this fuss about water?!

All this deal with water? Absolutely. Your body is mostly water. Nutrient transportation requires water. Proper body function requires water. Take care of low-hanging, easy stuff like water and walking breaks.

You know you are drinking enough water if your pee is light yellow or clear. The darker it is, the more water you need to be drinking. And remember, if you are thirsty, you forgot this. The less you feel thirsty, the better.

Let's pay attention to these small things. They all add up. And as you stack these up, the harder things get easier.

Happy 2023.

Let’s kick off this year with a listicle - how can I enable you hitting your health and fitness goals? Well, here’s how.

Let's kick of the new year with ten tips that will increase the probability of you achieving your fitness, health, and nutrition goals.

* Set a goal. You cannot hit your goal if you do not have a goal. Sound silly but doesn't make it untrue. While it might be hard to figure out if it is a sensible/right goal, don't overthink it. Set the goal and start working towards it.

* Set a longer timeline for your goal. Most goals that I've seen are quite ambitious. And that's a good thing. Straightforward goals are not going to do the job. But the converse of this is setting a timeline that is not congruent with the goal. For example, if you want to lose 25 kilos / squat double bodyweight / do 10 pullups etc, and you set that goal for January - the problem is with the January part. Instead, set the timeline to be later in the year, say September.

* Break the goal into milestones. How do 10 pullups translate over 9 months? You could have the goal as "30-second hang" as the January goal. You could have "be able to do 10 sets of 30-second hangs" as your February goal, and so on. Having milestones allows you to take your ambitious goal and break it down into bite-sized chunks.

* It is not going to be easy. If it was easy, it wouldn't even feature as a problem. Set your mindset from the get-go. This is going to involve a lot of hard work. It is not going to be complex but it is not going to be easy. Life is going to get in the way. You are going to have hard days, difficult days, and bad days. You are going to have failures.

* Progress is not going to be a straight line. Even if you keep putting in adequate effort, results are not going to follow the pattern you have in mind. This is not a mechanical item. You will see results. You will plateau. You will slip back a couple of steps. Expect it. Keep at it.

* Talk to someone who has done it and get their opinion. They can tell you what to watch out for. They can tell you what derailed them. And how they tackled a certain issue. Get their opinion. And contextualise it for yourself.

* High-five yourself. Celebrate every small victory. Celebrate showing up. If you celebrate only the results, you will be celebrating too little. Showing up to the gym requires celebration. High-five yourself (yes, literally) at the start and end of your session.

* Find a partner / community. It is much easier to have (at least) one more person on the journey. They'll pick you up and motivate you when you are down. And you do that when they are down. Stick to being positive and supportive. No criticism, self or otherwise.

* Have fun doing it. It will all come crashing down if you are not enjoying the process. If you are not celebrating if you are not high-fiving if you are not cheering yourself and your partner on, you will be sending bad juju to yourself. And it will show up in a drop in motivation.

* Have a plan. Goals and timelines are great. You need to have a concrete plan that breaks down these goals and timelines. What are the actual things that you need to do? If you want to "lose 25 kilos", it requires you to "eat better". This translates into many actions, some of which include "have a weekly menu" and "throw all the junk into the trash." So, draft the plan.

* Keep the plan the plan. Here's your bonus tip. Keep the goal the goal. Keep the plan the plan. Don't tweak. Don't improvise. And definitely do not add more to it. While goals might need tweaking and plans will need improvisation, wait. Every month, you can look at this analytically by seeing your milestones, the effort you can put in, and all that. Changing plans every week or daily is a recipe for disaster.

Remember, this month is going to be you have a high level of motivation and drive. But this is not going to continue for the rest of the year. And that's fine. Expect it. Plan for it. Prepare for it.

That’s it to kick off the new year, an easy, skimmable and readily actionable post. I’ll see you here next week.

Today’s post dives a bit more into my introspective self and my struggles with self-judgment. As always, I do go all over the place and I hope you stick with it and let your mind run around as well, and see if there’s anything useful for you.

Listening better

Being a better listener is a skill. It is one that I work on, especially as I have found myself disengaging from conversations. This dates back to my youth.

When I catch myself doing this, the first voice that comes into my head is another me that judges my disengagement. This voice dates back to my youth. This larger issue is one I am working on and while it is going to be a long process, I realised something.

When I disengage, it is often when I have an immediate and visceral opinion/stance. And actually, this applies when I am engaged as well. When that stance is formed, I am not listening as completely as I was before that formation.

Depending on processes too complicated to explain with too many variables and memories, all of us have this opinion/stance/like/dislike formation.

What seems to happen is we push this stance on the other person.

Whichever way it goes, open-hearted listening has taken a hit. You end up rejecting and not listening. Or you end up accepting without contemplating.

Self-judgment

Self-judgment is a topic I visit with my therapist at regular intervals. And something they said has got me to look past superficial layers in my process.

So far, my process has been to have a visceral reaction. And if it is negative, be an ass to me for judging the conversation. Or if it is positive, pay too much heed to the subject being said without holding it with curiosity.

There's a reason blindspots are, well, in one's blind spot.

Why is this self-judgment and not a case of me being a snob? I am not judging the people around me. It isn't a case of me saying "they are boring." but "I cannot bring myself to talk/listen around this topic at this moment."

A visceral feeling/emotion/thought reaction has happened that taints the perspective with which I can continue this conversation. Or participate in it.

Listening has reduced

Whichever way it goes, positive or negative, listening has reduced. The negatively tainted judgment is a vicious and negative loop. The positive one could also be detrimental in ways I don't realise.

While the issue of self-judgment is the harder problem and one that I work on, I realised there are other lessons here.

Where does the reaction come from?

The voice inside your head is not yours

It's an imitation of the voices from before

Repeating on a loop inside your quiet core

Receiving since your youth

When your choices weren't even yours

The above is an excerpt from a poem by In-Q.

Why do I have these beliefs and opinions? Where do these visceral reactions come from? Are they true? Are they relevant? While a lot of these 'shortcuts' are essential to our survival (see danger = get the f**k out of there. Versus "hmm, let me analyse this for 5 minutes."), not all the time.

Ideas are useful. Ideologies are restrictive. Useful. But restrictive.

My opinions and previous learnings are ideas. They are a torch to finding a path. They are not the path itself.

So, I spent some time digging deeper into this arising.

And here's my current plan of action.

* When this reaction/opinion formation occurs, I mark it. I mentally log it.

* I let it go (do my best to) and dive back into the conversation with as much open-heartedness as possible.

* And if I cannot, well, it happens. I attempt to not be an ass to myself.

When I sit down to journal my day, I log these events/opinions.

Why do I like them or am attracted to them?

Why do I dislike them?

Why did I react that way?

If I was not able to pause and distance myself, well, that's learning too.

One obvious (not to me) realisation was all of these are about me. And not about the other person/object at all.

Work in progress

A note before we close this out. In case all of this comes across as if I am well "put together" and I get every rep right, well haha.

Far from it. In fact, I don't know how many reps I get wrong.

This post is inspired by getting one rep wrong and sitting with it.

I was at dinner with my wife and a few close friends. And despite my attempts to stay "in the conversation", I disengaged.

Self-criticism doesn't work.

But that doesn't mean the episode is useless. Well, it is, if I am oblivious to it. Which is why I said I am not sure how many reps I get wrong.

But as self-awareness increases and having good people around me who call me out with kindness, this is less of a problem.

Everything is a rep.

Everything is a learning opportunity.

And sometimes that sounds overwhelming.

But even that's a stance that one doesn't need to hold on to.

I am a work in progress. And that's the fun part.

And that’s it for today! I’ll see you next week.

How’s your weekend going so far?

This week, the topic of “too much” has been echoing in my head. I do better work, creative work, and actually finish things when I have lesser things to do. When there’s too much, I am often on autopilot. Entire weeks go by without anything substantial to show for it.

This is expected in a lot of places of an entrepreneurial journey. But that doesn’t mean things have to be that way. Especially when progress is better (for me) with a different approach.

Too much

You take on more than you should.

You said yes when you should've said no.

You thought it'd be easier than it is.

You thought it'd take lesser time than it requires.

You thought you had thought of everything.

How much is too much?

Work/Gym/Diets/Stuff

What am I talking about? Lots of things.

Work. Taking on a project that's less fun than you thought. Taking on more and more projects than your time can handle. Producing average quality work as you are spread across too many things.

Gym. Spending hours and hours at the gym. Constantly aiming to outdo the previous session. To get more weight on the bar. To get more muscles in your body. To get more external validation.

Diets. Obsessing over what to eat, and what not to eat. Saying no at social gatherings. Constantly watching the scale. Not having fun doing any of this. Not seeing progress in doing this.

Stress. Boils up. Keeps boiling up. And somehow, you let some steam out and hope to get back to things.

Thinking. About everything. Thinking too much. Is this right? Or should you be doing something else? Should you be doing more of this? Should you be doing more of this and more of that?

Unsustainable in the short term

Most new habits or changes of direction need a dramatic shift.

If you are looking to get fit, aiming to go to the gym for one hour a day for 100 days in a row is a lofty and difficult challenge. Is it too much? Definitely. But is it wrong (to set that goal?) Hard to say.

For a few of you, that commitment might be needed to shift you away from the status quo. And it will deliver a large set of results that vindicates what you are doing. That validation might be what's needed to make this into a long-term habit.

Doing something unsustainable in the short term might be the key to creating a sustainable habit over the long term. Talk about contradictions.

But for some of you, it might be too lofty a challenge. Or luck doesn't go your way - a flat tyre on the way to the gym, a life event, a spanner in the works and it derails.

See-saw

Nothing happens in isolation.

Too much of something here will mean something else has to give.

Too much of something for too long will spell disaster.

Too little of something (rest, vacation, chilling out) will also spell disaster.

Do your best

Observing from an external perspective, without any judgment can help us cut through all this. And employing a coach who can provide this external perspective, and who has tools and frameworks at their disposal will provide structure and objectivity.

Too often, we think we need to go it alone. Or that this is something only we are facing.

That's not true. Almost everyone is going through the same thing, or at least, has gone through it (if not right now.)

Too much sucks.

Too little sucks.

I am at a place where I need to say "No" a lot more.

I'd rather have too little on my plate to understand where I am at and how I am doing.

Having too much is a confounding method of copping out from figuring out what I need to be doing.

And for things I've said "Yes" to, I need to bring my best.

It is that simple.

And that’s it for today. See you next week.

In today’s post, I present a mental model that will help you not get distracted by “this move is better” or “that diet is better”. How? By getting you to think about:

* is it better for ME?

* can I get all of the benefits i.e. am I ready for it?

I am sure you are going to find this useful. So, let’s get to it.

The latest and greatest

You look around on social media or lame-ass "news" sites. Someone's always selling you the latest and greatest.

the best fat-loss exercise you are not doing

5 minutes a day of this is all you need to get a 6-pack

see how this person lost 30 kilos by just drinking this concoction

Click-bait nonsense and irresponsible. It ends up confusing people. Even though common sense tells them otherwise, it makes them wonder if they should be doing something else.

Is running better than walking? Or should you go swimming?

Are kettlebells better than dumbbells?

Should you do a barbell back squat versus a barbell front squat?

It depends. On you. On your skill levels. On your available resources (if you don't have a kettlebell but have two dumbbells lying around, a DB is better, isn't it?!?! Because it allows you to do something right now, which a non-existent KB cannot.)

Even if we zoom into a specific universe, this problem derails a lot of folks.

The kettlebell swing is a great movement. And as kettlebells have regained popularity over the two decades, the benefits of the swing have been felt by many.

It is an amazing movement that builds:

* strength-endurance

* looks and feels bad-ass

* challenges your mind and body

* gets you the benefits of plyometrics without the impact

* is time-efficient

and a whole lot more.

But when we look at the click-bait universe, it will tell you that the KB swing will melt away your belly fat. Or if we misunderstand experts who tell us that 300-500 swings a week is all they do for physical activity to stay in shape. We immediately try it. 300 swings do not get us crazy abs. It leaves us sore and we pull our back.

And we abandon it.

Without knowing HOW to use a tool, we can get derailed. And because we cannot yet differentiate between silly fluff and "requires a lot of skill", we lump them both together.

In today's post, I'd like to help you build a better mental model in picking and understanding "What should I do?" and how not to get fooled by bulls***.

I'll use fitness metaphors and some specific KB movements but the point is much larger.

The promise of ...

Let's take driving a car. If you don't know to drive, you aren't going to move the car an inch. Or crash the car into the wall in front of you. On a scale of 1-100, you don't need to be at 100/100. 80/100 is a good place to be, and no more. But 50/100 is a cause for concern.

A lot of people are fascinated by kettlebells because of their promise of it. And yes, almost all true. The kettlebell swing is an amazing movement and a few 100 reps of it per week will be enough.

And when people enter the kettlebell universe and have been working on the swing, their eyes turn soon. They learn about the kettlebell snatch, the tsar of all movements.

But what about your skill?

And you think that will give you the results that you are not currently getting.

While the kettlebell swing is good, if you do the snatch, six packs are going to leap at you.

The complication is the fine print.

You need good technique. To get adequate benefits.

And you need a GREAT technique to compound the benefits over time.

The movement is not as important as your ability in the movement.

The mental model

Let's take a look at four movements:

* Walking

* Running

* KB Swing

* KB Snatch

We've all walked. And we understand that running is harder than walking. Running requires us to be in better shape, whatever that is. But running also burns more calories per minute.

Intuitively we know this. More work = harder and more output.

What is the potential of the exercise? The potential of an exercise is how much impact it can create in you - calories burned, cardiovascular improvement, strength improvement and whatever else - everything is lumped together and into one number. This is independent of you i.e. it is all about the movement. Or to use a car metaphor, how fast can the car go. Which is independent of how skilled you are to drive the car safely at that speed.

Let's look at the four movements again:

* Walking: 30 units of potential.

* Running: 60 units of potential.

* KB Swing: 75 units.

* KB Snatch: 90 units.

On paper, duh, of course, we should pick the snatch as it is giving us 3 times the benefits. Whatever that means - don't dig too deep into it. It is a mental model for us to understand.

Let's say you cannot run 500 metres. You run 250 metres, you walk 250 metres and you do this for 30 minutes. A good runner will cover 5 kilometres in that time while you cover 2 kilometres. So, your running potential is closer to 20 units and not 60 units (which is the maximum you can extract but your skill level limits you currently.)

And after a few weeks of running, your shin hurts, your calves feel tight and your lower back is tender. Why? Because you are working on a skill that's a bit more than what you and your body are ready for. Currently.

Wouldn't you be better off starting to walk? Yes, the potential of it is only 30. But you can, in a short amount of time, get 27 units of output from it as you start to walk faster, with better posture, and with good breathing and all that.

By now, your calves are used to doing work as well and you can transition to running. And you get more out of running!

Likewise, when you enter the kettlebell universe, remember that to extract the full potential of the kettlebell swing, you have a while to go.

If you can do swings with a 16 kg bell, your potential is 50 units (out of 75).

If you can do superb swings with a 32 kg bell, you are operating at 70 units.

But if you switch to a KB snatch when you are at 50/75 on the swing, your snatch output might be 40/90.

You + how well you are doing + the skill = Output

There are two components:

One: you/your skill/mentality/technique/consistency.

Two: what you are doing - the tool, the potential of it, the benefits of it.

You can use a tool with a potential of 40 and get to 35/40 first.

Rather than working on a tool with a potential of 90 but not being skilled enough to do it.

Moves are a tool. A kettlebell is a tool.

To produce forward motion, you need to pick a tool that works for you, and put in the quality effort.

Don't get distracted by fads and clickbait stuff.

If a tool doesn't work for you, remember - it does not work for you TODAY. Build up to it. Come back to it later. See what is the appropriate tool for you today.

The more tools in your toolbox, the better. You can pick the right tool for the task at hand, for how you are feeling and so on.

You know better. Stay the course. Stay consistent.

That’s it from me! I’ll see you next weekend.

Almost into the last month of the year. Time for wrapping up the end of the year and hopefully some time off as well.

As January rolls around, weight loss is always on my mind. Even after 10+ years of conversing with students, I realise there’s a disconnect. Yes, I can learn more ways to communicate (which is kinda what this blog is about) and also learn to understand the complexities involved more.

Over the years, what I’ve seen is that losing the weight is much much easier when compared to keeping it off. Thinking long-term is our approach at both The Quad and the Daily9. In fact, at the latter, we’ve revamped our coaching and app based on understanding user patterns and feedback (more on this over the next month.)

So, let’s talk weight maintenance. As unsexy as that might be, it is the hard problem.

Weight loss is accessible

A lot of us want to lose weight. Either we understand we feel better when that happens, or we have a certain expectation of how we should look. Whatever the reason, weight loss is by far the #1 goal for people.

First up, we want fat loss and not weight loss. What's the difference?

Our body stores fat as an extra source of energy, in case times get hard. Due to the abundance of easy calories today, most of us end up eating more than we need and this gets converted into fat. Our body weight is made up of muscle, our organs, our bones and all that, plus the fat. A bunch of this fat is needed - the brain, for example. Most of us are referring to the excess fat we hold - that's the weight we want to lose. It is an important distinction.

Second, like money or shiny objects, this can take a bad turn real quick. We want more. More. MORE. We thought things would feel different once we got there. But it is harder than expected and not that different. We don't stop. That mindset needs to change.

What I am talking about is "reasonable fat loss."

What does that mean? It depends.

On a few objective measures and a few subjective measures.

The objective measures can be your:

* blood work (your lipid profile, your blood sugar markers etc)

* visceral fat (the fat around your internal organs that we cannot see)

* resting heart rate (RHR)

* heart rate variability (HRV)

* waist: height ratio (WHR).

Your body weight is also one but be cautious that it doesn't bother you.

The subjective measures, well, this is about what's important to you. "Can I eat socially without worrying much", "Can I travel without it requiring intense research on where to eat", "Can a jolt or 3 not affect things in my life" etc

Trial and error

Over the years, I've seen our students lose weight. And almost anyone I interact with outside The Quad community, as the subject will inevitably turn towards fitness and weight loss, they've successfully lost weight. No one has been stuck with zero success. It might've required trialling out different diets and lifestyle fixes but something would've worked that got the scale moving.

But keeping that weight off for the long term...

The complication though, more than 80% of them fail in keeping the weight off. The lifestyle didn't stick. The habit didn't form. It was not sustainable. It was not what they thought it'd be.

Something didn't click.

The goal or the expectation or the subjective outcomes were not a right fit. Or the objective outcome included a number on the weighing scale which was not the right one.

What happens is a never-ending and annoying battle. Of losing weight. Putting it back on. And then losing the same weight again. And putting it back on. Sometimes it stays off for a few weeks. Maybe for a few months. But it comes back on.

There is a limit to how much time we can hold our breath underwater. We need to come up for air. There's a limit to how much time we can do something unsustainable.

Do something else

Having gone through this many times, it is necessary to step back and change tack.

THAT has not worked. We need to have the courage to do something else this time around. We need to believe that this is the FINAL time. This time, we are going to go on a journey that will escort us on the path that works for us.

And once we go over that small hill yonder, we will chart our next path.

Right now, the only path in our heads is "I will do and lose ". We need to think beyond that. And a lot of us still think, yep, makes sense. And "I will do this right after I lose these pesky few kilos doing the unsustainable and then jump to the sustainable."

But that's ignoring the lessons from prior times. The unsustainable makes it hard. Micro-level changes that work for you will do better in the long run.

You are over-valuing the 1-2 month results and not looking at the 12-month horizon.

My challenge to you is to aim for 12 months of "doing pretty good" instead of a few weeks of holding your breath.

A 12-month focus

How might a year play out? Let's hypothesise.

January is a time to tighten things up. All of us have ambitious resolutions and more reserves of willpower. Let's definitely use it. We can do something unreasonable/unsustainable but with two important shifts in mindset.

One, focus on the effort and not the results. What does that mean? Follow the process. You have a clear plan. Now, do it. Expecting a certain timeline for results to follow is not in your control. It will cause you to second-guess the plan. Instead, just clock in and clock out.

Two, have the plan for February ready and it should not be the same plan as January. Why - changing it up helps. Plus, it should not be that difficult.

Building on this, here's a plan I have drawn up for a student who is willing to shift out of their yo-yo and see-saw. This is based on conversations, on figuring out what has worked and not, on where slip-ups happen and on understanding their year.

January

4 weeks of the D9, aiming for >90% compliance.

You can replace this with any diet of your choice but we designed the D9 to lead you into better long-term habits and so that's why that's the plan.

Take the last weekend in January off. It doesn't mean polishing off 3 cakes over the weekend. But chill. Relax. Quit thinking about weight loss.

February

Focus on sleep, activity and your biggest issue.

For me and my student, that's sugar. So, we will ensure over Feb that

* We will sleep at least 7 hours every night.

* We will get 45-60 minutes of activity every day. Most days, it will be a walk.

* We will avoid sugar 6 out of 7 days of the week.Why 6/7 - I've found that being in the 85% range works to show positive progress while being sustainable.

Again, take the last weekend in February off.

March

My student is a Chartered Accountant, which means March is a silly time at work.

Sleep is going to take a hit. In the past, I've attempted to force sleep as a condition, only to see things unravel even more, as it raises anxiety levels. Solving work-life balance, having considerate bosses etc is a hard problem that I as their coach have less control over. So, while sleep will be tracked, it is only there as a nudge.

Over March, the goal is to

* Track sleep. And have a 30-minute NSDR every day. NSDR means non-sleep deep rest. Yoga Nidra is the perfect example. It is a nervous system reset of sorts. It will help to paper over the cracks of not getting enough sleep and the inevitable increase in stress.

* Eat protein and vegetables in every meal. An increased focus on the quality of nutrients over this stressful period. Having protein and vegetables in every meal ensures satiety, a better nutrient supply, and reduced cravings.

* Avoid sugar and alcohol for 6 out of 7 days of the week. With reduced sleep and more work stress, the inevitability of reaching for easy comfort is a pattern we've observed before. And so, we will be disciplined and not give in here, and recognise it for what it is. After a stressful day, it is easy to slip into "I need some cake in me", or "I need a drink to settle down". Nothing wrong with it, as long as that voice does not own you.

Over conversations with my student and going over their journal, both of us know that this is something we'd rather tackle head-on. We know this is going to happen. We know why. Hence the yoga Nidra is in the plan. And based on how much/often these cravings occur, we will have other things going on as well - breathing, meditation etc

And again, take the last weekend in March off.

Rest of the year

You can see how the rest of the year will play out. Focus on a few things (I like the number 3) for ~8 months of the year, and tighten things up with the focus on all aspects of the Daily9 for ~4 months of the year.

And of course, measure your weight and waist every week.

If possible, have someone else note this down for you so that you don't spend any time thinking about it. Remember, it is a tool. It is an objective measure that's telling us whether things are working.

But the bigger tracker is the effort we are putting in, after having designed a sensible plan for ourselves.

Over the course of the 2023, you will find that:

* you will break through plateaus in your health and fitness.

* you will find you've accumulated a lot of new sensible habits.

* your new lifestyle will take hold and maintaining your "new" weight and habits is easier and simpler.

* you are in a different place about how you view your health and fitness. And how you approach life.

Think different. Think long-term.

And that’s it from me!

You have a chill Sunday, and I’ll see you next week.

Today’s post is about the fixation of weight, the trepidation with which a weighing scale is approached, and how much we let it define our happiness for the day or week or month or year.

I see this with a number of my students. While we have, over the past decade, worked out multiple methods of “Do this. Don’t do this.”, of bringing in community challenges, of gamification, of habit change, quite a few struggle to let it fully sink in.

I’ve seen a good chunk of students who let it sink in and reprogram themselves - their habits and more importantly, their mental approach.

This is about the other chunk of students who are still on their journey towards it.

Standard. Simple. Clear.

A standard method whenever you decide to work on your fitness or nutrition is measuring your body weight. 98% of people want fat loss when they embark on their journey - irrespective of trying a new diet or joining a gym. The other 2% are aliens in disguise who want to work on adding a new habit with no ulterior motives.

Measuring your body weight is a simple, clear tool. There's little confusion about progress/results. There are minimal guidelines about using it. There's only one thing to keep track of.

And yet, I've seen this tool shatter confidence, destroy self-image, and drive people to tears. Most times, it is the same people who repeat this self-flagellation routine.

A tool

Measuring your body weight is a tool. Not a validation mechanism. Not a goal. Not the light at the end of the rainbow.

If you are going to the gym because you want to lose weight, it makes sense to measure your weight before you start. And for the next few weeks or months.

If you started a new diet, likewise.

In fact, there's a case to be made for measuring your body weight every week, for the rest of your life. But not if it hurts you.

Making it more than what it is

But unfortunately, when we mistake a tool to be something it is not, we hurt ourselves. We harm ourselves. We dig a hole so deep that it feels impossible to come out of. We tell ourselves a story that we believe it truly.

A tool is simply a device used to carry out a particular function. And the function is to tell you what your body weight is.

But the association of how good a person you are, how good you should feel about yourself, how much you should berate yourself, how much harder you should work at the gym, how much starvation you are going to endure - that's all coming from somewhere inside of you. It is years of programming, of society, of seeing other people's words and actions (towards themselves and towards you).

Break out

Easier said than done. But you need to break out of seeing the tool for more than what it is.

If you are working on a diet, or want to lose weight by adding physical activity to your routine - measure your body weight. It makes sense. It tells you which direction you are going towards.

If you want to improve the measurement, measure your chest, waist, hip, and thigh circumference as well.  Especially if you are including resistance training in your routine, asyou might add muscle and lose fat. The scale won't change but the circumference will.

But stop aiming for a number - it is random. Because 11 years ago, you were at that number and you got a lot of compliments. Or 17 years ago, you were that number and fit into your favourite pair of jeans. Or 3 years ago, you were at that number and you felt great about yourself.

How do I feel

What you are looking for, what we are all looking for is "Do I feel good?"And that's going to come from inside. Not from a number. Not from external validation.

Use the tool for what it is.

Dig deeper. Find out what's bothering you. Until you do, you will:

* end up gaining and losing the same weight.

* expect to feel different and have your problems solved once you get to a certain weight.

* feel bad when you do not get to that number.

* hate yourself when you put on weight.

* lose self-confidence because you are not at that weight.

* and so much more.

You are all the validation you need.

That’s it from me for today! I’ll see you next Sunday.

Today’s post is about asking and giving advice.

Asking for advice from our friends and peers is normal and a great life hack. But it has its pitfalls. Here are my thoughts on how to navigate this, and how to make the most out of asking or giving advice.

Let’s get to it.

We reach out for advice

You ask for advice from people, on things you are unsure of or don't know enough about. Or when you are mulling over a big decision and stuck. When you were younger, your parents did this job for you and as you saw more of the world and made more connections, your network grows. So, when a question arises, you look for smart or successful people (relevant to the problem at hand) around you and ask for their advice. If you are like me, you turn to books as well.

Given the ease of everyone being able to publish their opinions online (from blogs like this to Twitter and Insta etc), there is a plethora of irresponsible advice.

The crux is most of the advice is a personal experience, shaped by prejudice and perspectives. And there's nothing wrong with that, except when generalised as "This happened to me. So, here's what YOU need to do."

It is a responsibility

Recently, a friend of mine was talking about moving back from the US to India. He had spoken to a couple of other friends of mine who had bad experiences in moving back from overseas. I've had a great experience moving back to India.

The advice he received was contradictory - based on each individual's prejudice and perspective. "Here's what happened to me in this situation" and so it is a bad idea or a good idea.

The more extreme the experience (better or worse), the firmer the advice. Which is plain irresponsible.

Founders at Work

A long time back, when I got my job working for a startup in the Valley, I bought this book called Founders at Work. A decent book with stories of how various startups made it big, the origin stories, their trials and tribulations, the pivots they did, and the various twists and turns before making it big.

When you zoom out enough, you can see the similarities and patterns. What also happens are you don't see a lot of what is not being said, what has been abstracted - either because it was not central to the narrative or too personal to share, or edited out. But all these are part of the journey. It is imperative to understand that one never sees the full picture, and one might not understand the individual prejudices that shaped decisions.

Specific vs Personal

The older I've gotten, the warier I've become in giving advice. My prejudices and opinions, however hard I try, are a part of me. A million experiences have shaped me, many of which I might not remember or comprehend. And that's what makes me me. Likewise, for my friend and for you.

And it is a bad habit that's easy to indulge in - giving advice. Whether one is asked for it or not.

Saying "I don't know" is underrated.

Of course, the more specific the question is and the more it is in one's domain of expertise, the more apt it is to offer perspective and advice. For example, "what should I do to lose weight", while rather vague, is something I can guide you on over the course of a long conversation. If you ask me "how do I fix my kettlebell swing", a good long look at a set or two, and I'll have specific tips and drills for you, and solve your problem.

Most questions and advice requests are murkier and deeper though. When you are asking for advice, and you definitely should, what works for me is to talk to at least a handful of different people. With different backgrounds and experiences, and asking them to share their experience. As I've learnt from talking to people smarter than me, they are wary of offering advice and sharing how and why they did what they did. This is something I've attempted to copy unabashedly.

Asking for advice

When you ask for advice, know that no one can or should be able to answer this question for you. If someone attempts to, it is a good litmus test (that you should be warier of what they are saying.)

Collect the stories and the experiences. You know the person, and you understand some of their perspectives and prejudices. You know what is common in your upbringing and what is different. Because all those go into the box marked "input" to create the decision marked "output."

And you form your construction of the stories. You contextualise. You sit with yourself and ask difficult questions and dig deeper. You need to understand and know yourself a bit better, to be able to take this decision that's required of you.

Understand the stories. Understand the why. From the person, you are speaking with. And your own.

And even if you decide one way, it doesn't close the door or do any such thing. It is the right decision to make today, based on what you know and understand.

Every time you are faced with a deep question, with a decision to make, it is an opportunity to learn and grow. Do the work!

And that’s it for today. You have a great Sunday, and I’ll see you next weekend!

Hope your Sunday is going well. Mine’s off to a slow start :)

But sitting at it and writing about it helps me. And now, off to go to the gym and doing a light workout to iron out a few more creases.

Brain fog

Some days, the brain doesn't work. Some days, the weights feel darn heavy. Everything is moving at a slow pace and the fog does not lift.

I am sure you've had days like this. I am having one of those days right about now.

Some days, the article writes itself. Some days, I can do no wrong at the gym. The weight flies up. My technique requires no thought - it feels natural and the bells feel like a natural extension of my arms.

I've had days like this as well, as I am sure you have too.

Without the down

Without the bad days, we won't have any 'good days'. If every day was a 7/10, life would be a lot easier but a lot more boring.

Without a down, there's no meaning of the word up, is there?

Do what you can

But what do you do on a down day? Is it a day to pack it in and not do anything? What if there's work to be done? Something that actually needs to be delivered, and not an article that could be construed as optional?

You do what you can.

It is easy to skip a workout. It is easy to say "I don't feel like it today" and vegetate. But when we get into the habit of showing up to the gym and doing something - as little as a set or two, we make a huge change.

Because the next day you feel like this, you know it is possible to not give in. You know it is possible to fight the good fight. You know it is possible to show up.

I've put in a lot of time and effort to fall in love with fitness. This makes for a lot of easy days at the gym - days when I can't wait to go in there. But on the days when I do not feel like it, I know if I show up and just do something, it makes all the difference.

Today's one of those days. I don't feel like it. But I'll head in and do a few sets of swings and goof around. Because when I am done, I will feel a whole lot better.

And so will you.

That’s it for this week. I’ll see you next Sunday!

All of us see only one facet of the world around us. From the elite sportspersons that we admire, to the business persons running gazillion $ corporations, to movie stars and all that. We see them at their best. But there are other sides to it.

Turning the lens on myself was something I was able to do only in the recent past, during lockdown. What is the price of passion? It was an important question, and one that I continue to ponder on.

The price of NOT living a purpose-filled and passionate life is too high. So, that’s sorted. But that doesn’t mean one lets go of what is important.

9 to 5

I never used to carry work home. Back in 2009-11, I was working at a large corporation in San Francisco. When I shut my laptop down and left for the day, I didn't think about work until I came back and opened the laptop the next morning. I never even took my laptop home, as it was for work and I'd leave it at my desk.

Work was something I did to get a paycheck. Which allowed me to spend 8 hours of my day (8 at work, and 8 sleeping, which leaves 8) doing what I wanted to do.

Over the past 11 years, my relationship with work has changed. I don't view work as a chore anymore. I work at a company that I helped found and a cause that's close to my heart - to help people improve their health and fitness and live stronger lives. This deeper sense of purpose helps me jump out of bed every morning. It keeps me motivated when things look bleak. It pushes me out of my comfort zone and keeps changing and evolving.

Shift

Two different streams conjoined and led me to move back to Madras to do what I do today. One is a growing malaise at work. My cushy job was not fulfilling, and I was getting itchy feet. Two, my personal transformation from being a clueless, unfit, unhealthy young adult to a strong person.

My self-transformation helped me realise this was a gap. If I had this problem, how many people around me are having this? How many people are driven to solve it for themselves? I could help with that.

Most of us suffer not from motivation or willpower but from a lack of a good teacher. I loved teaching, and here was a method to combine purpose, a deeper sense of self, and making a tangible, crucial difference in people's lives.

Good problems

Like the early stages of a relationship, when you are head over heels for somebody or something, you stop looking around. You lose all sense of balance and time.

I worked crazy hours and I loved it. The fact that I was in direct connection with the people I was working with and I could see the difference I was making with my own eyes kept fuelling the fire.

The pandemic was a good wake-up call. Visiting my old haunts in San Francisco before that helped rekindle memories as well. I realised I had fallen into quite a bit of autopilot and had lost a significant sense of my work-life balance.

The "good problems" of living your passion, as I realised. It always helps me to look at extreme cases, of people who are facing a similar challenge but at a higher level. And to see the direction they took, and if that appeals or not. Because we are looking at extreme levels of success (narrowly defined as fame/money/#1), their failures in life and relationships send a stark warning.

While I was nowhere close to redlining, having a few extra hours in my day due to the lockdown gave me time to stop and think. I realised I had gotten caught up in my b******t, yet again.

What's the end game?

What was I working towards? What's the end goal?

To have a work-life balance. To continue making a difference in people's lives. To have deeper relationships with the few people around me. To have enough time for myself, to learn and to challenge me. To have a good time.

To follow my own advice, I realised these were things that won't happen one fine day but had to start happening immediately. While there was no way to figure out the right answer, aiming in the right direction was a good start.

Course corrections

I have a tendency to over-correct. From my childhood, my rebellious nature has entailed dramatic shifts in attitude and action. But knowing this and allowing this has helped me move on with things. I know I'll get to balance.

Some things had become impossible. A weekend without work, for example. A vacation without an hour of work. The word impossible sends alarm bells and as part of my over-correction, I took a few weekends off . And longer vacations. And disappeared. Having a support system and an amazing team at work makes this possible, and lets me know that nothing burns down when I am not around. Or especially because :)

I stopped responding to WhatsApp or phone calls during certain hours of the day and most of the weekend.

Then, my thinking evolved. The only person judging that "a weekend without work" is good or bad is me. Instead, what is the larger goal here? And if I am making progress towards it, all is well.

The "Don't work on weekends" is a hard and fast rule that might not be the right one at all times. There are weekends when I enjoy working. There are weekends when I don't see my laptop. Likewise, there are vacations when I am off the reservation. And vacations where I check in.

The WhatsApp/Email checks are not about WhatsApp or email. But the relevant question is does it help or hinder me? Or better yet, the larger goal?

Figuring out my path and process is a constant. As my evaluation system keeps improving and as my personal dashboard provides better insights, I keep tinkering and making changes. And moving in a direction that feels better.

What changed was realising (well, not completely ...) there's no right answer. Nor am I expected to get it right. But instead, learning to listen to all parts of me, and not my head.

There is a cost to everything we do. Knowing the cost is important. Knowing our values and our end game, equally so. And then, we can start working on ensuring that we aren't f*****g ourselves up while narrow-mindedly going towards a goal that does NOT encompass all of us.

Note: If this post seems self-indulgent with all the first-person stuff going on, I apologise. But in case it isn't obvious yet, all my posts are written to me first and you second :)

That’s it from me. You have a good weekend, and if you are celebrating the festival - stay safe, have loads of fun. And remember, we get sweets whenever we’d like. There’s no reason to eat as if we aren’t gonna get any after the next few days.

And yes, that’s a note to self too!

Hope your Sunday’s off to a good start. If not, a nice long walk in the evening, or catching up with some friends is in order. Or curling up with a good book. I am currently reading The Swerve. About 100 pages in and hooked! Recommended by one of my friends who reads way more than me, I had to start it immediately. Thankfully, it is not way over my head (which I suspected it might be.)

In today’s post, I am exploring the work-life balance that seems to continue going to s**t. Not that anything’s wrong with work. But work is ONE part of our lives. When it takes over, it limits us. But as a race, we haven’t moved away from how much of a slog work is in a 1000 years. Why is that?!

Cultural Evolution

Physical evolution is slow. Cultural evolution is much faster and is constant.

As the context, the tools, and even values around us change, we evolve to adapt to it. The way we work, the things we value, the actions that we do.

For example, today everyone uses a computer (your phone is one) whereas even as recent as 20 years back, it was a choice.

The Plus

As the world moves, it sweeps everyone with it. That's how a cultural revolution happens.

With the Internet and the technological advances that we've made, paradigm shifts in thinking, in working, and in play have become regular.

One of the many interesting advances has been the ability for anyone to create. Before, only if you were a made musician, you could make and distribute music. Now, you can make music and share it with the world. Likewise with any art, app, or writing.

If you are good enough, you will be found.

That's f****n' awesome.

The Minus

And therein comes the complication. Because there's always a but.

Other parts of this cultural evolution aren't much different. One part of the lack of evolution, or rather going backwards, is work culture. The always-on. Hustle.

Note: Yes, the world is going backwards or rightwards. But that's a topic I am not an expert on. I am going to stick to work culture and work-life balance, of which I see a lot of and interact with my students about.

Thousand years ago, the farmer and the weaver and all manual labourers and pretty much everyone except the nobility did back-breaking work. They were spent after a day's work.

And this has continued. In every day and age, the privileged class sat on their ass while most of the people were working crazy hours.

With technology, with tractors and farming equipment, with computers and the Internet, with advances in every direction, the expectation was a lot more idle time for the populace. That we'd get done with our work quicker and with greater efficiency, and have the time and energy to spend doing other things.

But while our tools and our tech has undergone significant revolutions, most of us are still chained to our jobs for unreasonable amounts of time.

And while previously the job itself was backbreaking and took a toll, today's desk jobs make one weak and tight, mentally sap you and take a comparative toll on your health.

Training = Sandbox

Expecting a revolution to happen from technological means is probably not the way. Instead, this has to happen as a culture. As a way of thinking.

From freedom, as a choice, we need to learn to move away from "always on". Because it is our choice, isn't it?

In the beginning, I did what my coach told me to do. I'd go in and there'd be a clear plan for the day and the week. This is how many miles we are gonna run on Monday and Thursday. On Tuesday, this is the track work we are gonna do. And on Saturday, here's the long run.

And at CrossFit, until the coach wrote the workout on the board, I had no thoughts. And once they wrote it, I had no thoughts or opinions.

As I learned more and more and became a coach myself, I went through a long idiot phase. Where I coached myself and wrote my own training plan. This would involve me doing 75 different things and then jumping to 75 new things in 6-8 weeks. The more I knew, the fewer results I saw.

Two simple things have changed on the training front. One, not writing my training plan and instead doing one of Pavel's. And two, doing them for at least a year, rather than a quarter. And three, which is actually due to #1, is minimising the number of things I am doing.

With too much knowledge and freedom, I became unhinged and rudderless.

How this relates to the larger "always on" and poor work-life split - here's my opinion. We are not the masters of our thoughts and feelings at all. With the amount of information and success stories and advice and hacks we hear from around us, we are attempting to sculpt our Frankenstein's monster of a method out of them all. If the people on Insta/Twitter with 100k followers are speaking about hustle culture, we are hustling. If they are talking about playing hard and working hard, we know we need to do that too. And when everyone around you is putting in that kinda hours, it becomes impossible to break away from that and do things your way.

You are a mirror of everyone around you.

And so, we are all stuck in a fucktarded trap. Where we all think we will find salvation by doing more of this and we'll get out of here where we can start doing less of this, once we get there.

Or, we can start doing less of this. and more of what we want and need to do as well.

But unless we take the time to know what that is, we won't have the courage to.

What's next?

Personally, this is the battle. to quieten the noise in my head and to hear and feel what it is that I want and need for myself. To snip away at what are reflections and echoes of everyone else. And to get at the heart of what drives me.

It has been an uphill battle. It will continue to be, at least for the time being.

But it is fun and challenging. There are times when I throw the baby out with the bath water. There are times when I get swept with the popular opinion. And then I learn to catch myself, thanks to conversations with mentors - in books and in real life.

As always, learning from my training is how I keep things simple. What is working for me are:

* not coaching myself.

* being minimalistic.

* having a long-term plan.

* ensuring there's the right level of discomfort along the way.

* ensuring that there's a lot of learning along the way.

* learning the difference between obsessing vs being interested in mastery.

Adapting that to the larger scheme is the journey I am on.

While the specifics will not be relevant to you. A lot of us are in the same boat. Anything of use will need contemplation from your end. It will require you to apply things in your context, and see what happens. If some part of this post resonated with you, I urge you to set aside an hour today and do some thinking.

And that’s it for this Sunday. I’ll see you next week.

In this week’s episode, I want to talk to you about feeling better. Whether you go to the gym or play sport or haven’t found the motivation or time to start your fitness habit, an often overlooked part of life is recovery.

When we focus on adequate recovery, we feel great. And this allows us to do things better - whether it is work, or life, or simply being us.

Start with recovery: 7 strategies to make you feel amazing

Those of you who are good about your fitness habit will ensure you get enough and more activity. But how much attention do you pay to your recovery?

Those of you who do not have your fitness habit zeroed in, a huge reason could be that it is your body's way of telling you that it is not ready for more stress. Now, this is important, so let's discuss that a bit more before we talk about recovery strategies.

Too stressed to add a stressor

When you are unwell, you feel like staying in bed for longer. You want to push work away and instead vegetate on the couch, watch some mindless TV.

That's your body getting what it needs - minimal calorie expenditure and lots of rest. So that it can stay in parasympathetic mode and fight the infection.

But some of you don't listen to your body. Because you aren't sure about the difference between slacking off and needing to rest.

If you've tried to go to the gym but failed to convert it into a habit, this could be a factor. You might have way too many stressors in your life that whenever you add a new stressor, it is too much to handle. You feel too tired to go to the gym, you are too sore, or your motivation drops. In some way, your body is telling you to cut it out. And since you don't have the habit yet, it becomes too easy to say "Okay fine, I'll listen to you and not go to the gym."

But the issue is, in a week or so, once you are recovered, you find it impossible to get back on to the gym habit.

So, what do you do?

Focus on recovery!

A few recovery strategies

The idea behind these are:

* to reduce the stress felt by life, and not only from fitness activities.

* to balance the parasympathetic and sympathetic systems - rest and digest vs fight or flight.

* to reduce fatigue, both physical and mental.

Let's get to it.

* Sleep. Are you sleeping at least 7 hours every night? If not, that's the first step.

* Breathe. Diaphragmatic breathing i.e. using your diaphragm to breathe is how we are meant to breathe. The diaphragm is the muscle whose function it is to get our breathing going. But most of you use the supporting musculature to breathe. Spend 10 minutes sitting or lying down and breathing deep and slow into your belly.

* Stretch. You sit too much. You spend too much time at your desk. Your body gets weak and tight. The tension builds and is causing more tension in your muscles and mentality. By spending 15 minutes stretching, you get into a calm state, and relax your mind and body. Here's a 15-minute routine for you to start off with.

* Oiling the joints. Stretching helps the muscles but is only part of the puzzle. Greasing and oiling the creaky joints will help you feel better. It is a great way to start your day and/or end it. Here's a curated playlist for you.

* Get a massage. Releasing the tension, massaging out the adhesions that accumulate in the body can be done by various massaging techniques. For most of you, the act of lying down with nothing to do for an hour is a huge part of the release process. The actual massage is a huge bonus.

* Sauna/Steam. Sitting in a steam/sauna gets the body invigorated and coupling it with a cold shower will do wonders for your recovery. The heat helps in increasing blood flow, amongst other things. The contrast of the cold helps energise you.

* Chill. Do nothing. Do your favourite activity. Read a book. Watch TV. Bum around. Hang out with friends. Most of you get here out of exhaustion and when you are burnt out. Instead, do it before you get there.

Recharging your batteries will help you be more productive at work and at the gym. And of course, at home.

And hey, it could be the difference between you sticking to your gym habit for the long-term. Remember, activity is a MUST for good physical and mental well-being. There's no way around it. These strategies will help you feel good and kick off the malaise, and get you to falling in love with fitness.

And that’s it for this week. You have a great Sunday, and I’ll see you later.

I am travelling - hence the delay in the post and the audio quality.

I had a lot of fun writing this post as this is something that’s been on my mind for the past few months, and I had the chance to put it down here.

Variety is the spice of life

The need for variety and change is constant. You want variety and choices in your workout routine, in the places you eat, the things you do, where to hang out, what to do when you hang out, and the types of movies you see.

As training is my sandbox for life, I caught myself looking for a variety for no reason, and I could see a direct connection to my reduced patience. From being unable to wait in line without picking up my phone to dick around, the issue boils down to items across various timescales.

The red light is your friend

Recently, I had the chance to do something interesting - to eat by myself. I thought I could do this anytime. But that's because I did it while reading a book, which for some reason I didn't think was the same as a distraction like watching TV. It is, as much of a book snob, as I might be.

Because I am not focusing on my food, am I.

But having this opportunity to eat in silence was fascinating. There were two things I had not paid adequate attention to. One, I paid a lot more attention to the taste, the texture, and the entire process of eating. What the food felt like, how did chewing affect it, what did it feel like in different parts of my tongue etc?

Two, I started thinking about how the food came to my plate. This was inspired by Thich Nhat Hanh - if you've read him, you know what I mean.

It is frickin’ nuts if you think about it.

Let’s take the dosai + chutney, or the paratha + pickle.

The grain, the rice or wheat, was harvested in a village not anywhere 100 km from you.

By people who don’t know you, doing their job.

The veggies for your chutney, likewise. But harvested rather recently. All of these were sent on trucks/rail, handled by 100s of people along the way. And then sent to the market, bought by someone to your local market and then to the local grocery, and finally to your house.

As Thich Nhat Hanh says, the clouds are in your food. The soil is in your food. The sun, the rain, they are all in your food. If you look closely enough.

Choices, Distractions, Entertainment

But in a world which seems to only be about infinite choices and distractions and entertainment, who the f**k wants to think about this kinda stuff?!

Who wants to eat and NOT watch TV or read a book when there are 100s of books and shows waiting to be consumed?!

Stop!

Back to Thich Nhat Hanh, who I discovered rather late in my life. Someone’s hard work and sweat went into making my food possible.

We are all interconnected and this is one of those connections. The entire ecosystem of the world is interlinked way beyond my comprehension, and I don't mean only how we are affecting the rain elsewhere, or creating deserts and all that dastardly human stuff.

When we stop, there are things available to us. They are always available but obscured by the veil of Netflix and pulp fiction.

It requires us to stand still and possibly swim against the current.

It isn’t easy.

When I get the opportunity to eat alone, I am often tired and want to be distracted. Funnily, it is easier to eat alone when I am not tired. When I am tired, I want a distraction. Which makes no sense but there it is.

What does this have to do with wanting variety? Well, we are all distracted, constantly looking for something.

When that something requires us to stop moving, to stand still, to smell the roses, to see the clouds and the sun and rain in our food. To stand firm against the current.

And make an effort.

Where does this leave me? With a message to self.

Be conscious.

Make an effort to stop and smell the roses.

Since every thing is a rep, every meal is a chance.

Even if it is a minute, even if it is for a morsel.

To stop and see the sun in my food.

I hope you will too.

Hope you found this interesting. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic, if you have any. Have a great weekend!

Today’s post is about 5 books that I have learned a lot from.

Books are great mentors. Books allow me to read and process at my pace. I love books. But for a few years, I read considerably lesser than I had ever done. I was caught being busy. I sacrificed the time I spent reading by time I was doing. But finally, I caught myself and re-started my reading habit.

Using today’s post to share a few books that I enjoy.

Books are a medium that work for me. They've allowed me to see what someone's else's brain functions like. Some authors you connect with because they express a thought in your head much better than you can, even to yourself. When you click with a book, you can undergo a paradigm shift. It leads you down rabbit holes you never thought possible. I've chosen 5 books that led me to spiral upwards.

Never Let Go by Dan John

The first one is Coach Dan John's Never Let Go.

This is a book on life, a book on strength training, a book on principles and lessons on both. This is a book I re-read every other year (at least.) Some lessons clicked immediately with me because I had gone through a similar experience. And with subsequent readings and my added experience, I realised Coach was also clairvoyant. So, I reframed the lessons in this book into two - stuff I have learned and can use his words to develop a cheat sheet for and stuff that I don't have the wisdom to process yet but I should copy.

I'll leave you with one of the latter - Work / Rest / Play / Pray. Finding balance in our lives, especially as we keep getting busier and busier, with more things to do, more places to vacation, more TV to watch, more work to do, more friends to drink with, more drinks to drink, more food to eat - the stress of living has gone up. Silly us, eh!

Coach talks about how we need to find balance amongst these four aspects of our lives. And how as we find the balance, we will spiral upwards.

A couple of years ago, I had the opportunity to chat with Coach - one of the silver linings of the pandemic. Until then, I had remained a silent consumer of his work and never gotten around to connecting with him.

How to Live by Derek Sivers

Derek's one of my favourite authors. He presents a contrarian perspective. For those of you who know what CD Baby was, he's the founder of it.

His writing is succinct. His editing is brutal. Reading his books is a breeze. I love all his books and you won't go wrong by buying all four. From one of his other books (Hell Yeah! or No - you can read it in its entirety via his blog), I learned this wonderful lesson. Well, when I say I learned it, I mean I'd like to learn it. It is simply - when something comes up, do you feel "Hell Yeah!!!". If you don't, your answer to it is "Nopes."

I find myself agreeing to a bunch of things that are not "Hell Yeah!" and over the past few years, I've started to say no to a few of them. I am yet to work up the courage to say no to all them but I know I need to get there.

Here's another short and brilliant work from him - a TED talk on how to start a movement.

Tao of Jeet Kune Do by Bruce Lee

Those of you who read my quotes would know that I quote Bruce Lee a lot. His thinking and philosophy connect and as I read more about philosophy and his influences, I understand more of his writings.

This book has a lot of stuff about his martial art, which is not relevant. But I found them useful to think about my physical and mental training in lifting weights and kettlebells. For example,

The mastery of proper fundamentals and their progressive application is the secret to being a great fighter.

But it is his musings on the larger schemes of life that blow my mind away. Reading this as a 28-year-old who, until then, had paid zero attention to deeper thoughts, I was hooked. I'll leave you with one more.

When real feeling occurs, such as anger or fear, can the stylist express himself with the classical method, or is he merely listening to his screams and yells? Is he a living, expressive human being or merely a patternized mechanical robot?Is he an entity capable of flowing with external circumstances, or is he resisting his set of chosen patterns? Is his chosen pattern forming a screen between him and the opponentand preventing a "total" and "fresh" relationship?

The War of Art by Steven Pressfield

This book was the slap in the face that I needed to start creating again. My reading habit was rekindled. My blog writing was kickstarted. My thought process that was stuck in the weeds with the same patterns and routines and the constrained universe was broken.

What I needed was a slap. And this book delivered that.

If you feel stuck, if you are procrastinating, if you think you are here in this world to do something awesome but aren't figuring it out, do yourself a favour and get slapped.

A Guide to the Good Life by William Irvine

I always thought philosophy was complicated and useless for life. That only bearded gents in stuffy suits discussed using words that I hadn't seen in a dictionary. In parallel, I was also looking for non-sectarian methods of how to be a decent human being. There is a lot of that in philosophy without the mumbo-jumbo.

This book on Stoicism was eye-opening for me. It led me to other books on Stoicism - Meditations, Ryan Holiday's work, Seneca, Epictetus etc. - but this book was where it started. Written, with adequate hand-holding for the noob, I realised that philosophy was ALL about living a good life. It led me to explore previously unexplored parts - spirituality, meditation, shedding old labels.

It is easy to get carried away by labels. One doesn't need to be a Stoic (different from the English word stoic) to learn practical, fundamental lessons from this school of philosophy. A powerful lesson from the Stoics, for example, is to control the controllable. We lose our s**t all the time by trying/wanting to control something that is out of our control. Understanding that you are being a nincompoop, coming to terms with it, and working on controlling what is under your control empowers you.

Thanks for indulging me as I shared five books that I have enjoyed reading over the past decade. Not everything (or any) might be your cup of tea but I hope at least one of them is and it opens up a new door in your head.

Fundamentals seems to be a boring word. We either dismiss them as basic or obvious. They might be. But they are what brings home the gravy.

Here are a few things that I learned, and am still in the process of learning.

You have access to adequate information. In certain cases, too much of it. And along with it, there are your prejudices and preconceived notions about a few things, especially nutrition. Finally, there are your blind spots which you don't know.

Today, I'd like to share a few fundamental truths that I've learned for myself and they will apply to you as well.

Activity / Exercise

It helps if you enjoy it.

When you enjoy it, you will look at finding the edge of your comfort zone. You will hit your flow, your zone. You will be physically and mentally engaged with it.

Think of an activity you excel at. Your mind and body work in tune with it. You are emotionally aware and you are intuitively doing it, whatever it might be. The same applies to lifting weights or going running or physical activity.

If you don't enjoy an activity, it is worth your while to find one that hits this sweet spot. There is one out there.

Sleep

You have work to do if:

* you don't sleep 7 hours (at least.)

* you don't feel well rested when you wake up.

* your day does not function without doses of adrenaline and caffeine.

* your energy crashes at a certain time.

I've misunderstood feeling wired when I wake up early to mean that I am ready to go. Rather, my body has figured my routine out over the past decade and the juices are flowing. But give me any complex task to do after 7 pm and my IQ is at 50%.

Paying attention to energy crashes, even if I am getting the other stuff right, has been a good tool. It means I am getting something wrong. That something could be:

* poor nutrition the night before

* too many energy-sucking activities during the day

* poor nutrition during the day

* poor goal setting and planning

If you aren't sleeping well, pay attention to it. And sleeping well is qualitative and quantitative. Your brain does a lot of cleaning up and resetting while you sleep. It is important.

Food

You have a lot of emotional attachment to food. And that affects your choices and opinions.

For example, I grew up eating rice for breakfast. And I felt sluggish every day during school. So, I told myself that carbs were the enemy and stopped eating carbs for breakfast for many years. Until recently, when I had to spend 10 days eating nothing but simple carbs. For breakfast and lunch. And my energy levels were pretty amazing.

Food is simple. Eat real food. Eat vegetables. Eat protein. Don't eat too much crap. Don't eat too much. That's about it.

Remove your personal opinion and emotional baggage and learn to look at food as a simple, core process and see how you can optimise it.

Busyness

We all act too busy. We've cluttered our lives with objects and activities and apps that make things worse.

My wife and I were re-watching an old favourite movie of ours shot in the 1980s. In the opening few minutes, one of the characters remarks how "time is money" and we need to stay ahead at all times. Well, 40 years on, this phenomenon has continued. With modern tech, we should've succeeded in shaving hours from our day from mundane tasks (faster washing machines, dishwashers, Roombas, mobile phones, Zoom etc). But we all seem to have lesser time than ever before.

This is a choice.

Of course, I am speaking from a place of privilege. But in all probability, you are in the same place. Unless you are in a place where your daily meal is under threat, do you need to be part of the hustle culture?!

We hide behind busyness.

Your Turn

The 4 things I've mentioned are all stuff I realise I have/do. And I work on and remind myself to work on.

You might not be in the same place. But the unfortunate definition of a blind spot is that you don't know what it is. By asking for feedback from the people I spend a lot of time with, by journaling and by reading those journals, I've been able to decipher these rather fundamental things.

What comes to your mind when you read this?

I’d love it if you shared what’s on your mind.

My delaying the morning coffee experiment is going well. I find that I’ve reduced the amount of coffee I drink too. My aim is not to stop drinking coffee (what?!? why would you do that?!?) but to figure out my energy management and abrupt crashes.

Today’s post is about something else. It is vaguely on a topic I love - books. It is about a weakness of mine - buying courses/certs/books and attempting to cram their learnings into my brain. And what I’ve learned from my juvenile attempts to do so.

Packaging knowledge and compressing the work

Hacks and Shortcuts

We want insights. We want hacks. We want shortcuts. We want packaged knowledge.

Books are a great example of an attempt to impart knowledge and wisdom. They encapsulate the author's journey in understanding something. And their attempt at putting together the learnings. Quite a bunch of it come from the author's exploration of other people's learnings.

To get a book, you need to spend significant amount of time contextualising and applying. A book you resonate with is someone who's expressed the seed of a thought you had in a beautiful way. A book is a way of looking at something you couldn't have, as the sum total of your experiences won't allow you to do so. The ideas that ping inside your brain, the tangents you jump to, that's what you want.

But we are heading towards a different place. With book summaries and Blinkist. Nothing against book summaries. There are many books which are glorified blog posts and the book summary cuts across the fluff. And many books are repeating what others have said already.

Reading a book and/or a book summary and jotting down ten things to remember is missing the point. That's why, even though Twitter is filled with some amazing information, what does one learn? Not much. Because you cannot inject these learnings into your life, which is contextually different from the person sharing it.

Reading about one's life experience and assuming you know what to do now is silly. You are better off than before, maybe. But until you figure out a way of connecting it to your own internal experience, in whatever tangential or small way, there's no way of understanding.

And without understanding, there's no meaning.

A fitness challenge

Connecting this to fitness, let me introduce you to Coach Dan John's 10000 swing challenge.

Coach's challenge is simple - can you do 10,000 swings in 4 weeks, training 5 days a week? Simple math reveals that one should do 500 swings a day. Further details about the challenge are:

* You do 10 swings, rest a bit, 15 swings, rest a bit, 25 swings, rest a bit, 50 swings, and take a much longer break.

* That's one cluster. You do a total of 5 clusters.

* Men are recommended to do this with a 24 kg bell, while women are recommended a 16 kg bell.

This is not an easy challenge, nor is it meant to be. Doing 500 swings in a single workout is rough (assuming you know how to do swings well.) A set of 50 swings is brutal.

A 30-day challenge takes 30 days

A complication is the fact that this takes 30 days to do. What does one get at the end of the 30 days? What's the sell?

Another common complication might be to improve on the challenge.

Why not do this in 10 days instead of 30?

Why a 24 kg bell when I can do one-arm swings with a 32 kg? Should I not be working with at least the 32 kg bell?

Why should I not do a set of 100? Why bother with the pesky sets of 10 and 15?

Why not do one-arm swings? Or better yet, snatches?

Well, here's a reason - because that's not the challenge.

One must have the basic sensibility and humility to not improve (at least the first few times) on someone with a lot more coaching experience under their belt.

There are only two options when you read a training plan or challenge by a coach. Ignore it. Or follow it to the letter.

All the questions and improvements you have in your head will be resolved and transformed into learnings and better questions in 4 weeks, once you have the 10,000 swings under your belt.

A 30-day challenge requires 30 days of commitment. It requires you following the steps. While you might've done kettlebell swings for a few years, your lens on creating a challenge will be different from a coach who's worked with 1000s of people.

There are no shortcuts to doing 10,000 swings. You cannot learn the same from 1000 swings (vs 10,000.) That's not saying you won't learn anything from a thousand - but it will not be the same.

Packaged solutions are average solutions

But we live in an age of shortcuts. In an age of compressed knowledge. Of hacks and improvements. The age of hustle.

We think replacing rice with millets will solve all our problems. Or replacing rice with roti. Or not eating carbs. Or not eating fats.

We think going to the gym daily will solve our fitness problems.

We think slotting a packaged solution into our lives will take care of it.

It won't.

The ideas in a book, the fitness challenge, the "30 days of no sugar", the "I will read for 30 minutes daily" - they all need you to spend time with them. As you struggle through it, as you figure out why and how it applies to your life, you learn.

The insights come after. Not from the packaged version of the idea but the application of the idea. You will make mistakes, you will misunderstand, but as you teach yourself, you will learn.

The whole is more than a sum of the parts

You will have questions during, and after. You will doubt yourself. You will be confused. But that's okay.

When you look for a packaged solution, you are thinking of removing one stand-alone part of the machine and slotting an upgrade. The problem is not ONLY in the part but in the whole.

Going to the gym daily won't resolve your waist size. Eating better, sleeping better AND going to the gym will get you closer. But what will truly close the circle is letting go of wrong expectations, of living your journey, and trusting the process.

Your operating system keeps upgrading itself. That's the only way.

My way of understanding the books I read, the conversations I have, and the exchanges with my students and family is to write about them.

What I've realised is reading a book or studying a course is the first step in a journey. Not the last. The completion of that task indicates that now the real learning starts. And many times, you might realise it is not a tool you want to utilise. There are many average books out there. Or many good books which don't connect with you. That's fine. Drop it and move on.

When you find a book, a challenge, a tool, a mentor - well, that's a path to travel for a few weeks or months or years.

And that’s it from me for today. I’ll see you next weekend!

Today’s post is about a black/white tool for taking stock of your weekly eating. And how once you know this score of yours, you can take control of your weight loss journey for the rest of your life.

Hooked? Let’s find out and take control.

A battle of extremes

An extreme diet for a few weeks. Counting calories. Going off sugar for a month. All solid techniques to lose weight and get your reset going. While the idiocy of some diets is scary, as none of these is long-term interventions you can stick to, you will be fine for the most part. You will get a boost of results which you can build on.

The issue is most of you (and this was definitely true for me) are unable to figure out what maintenance means after that. We slip away into our old routine. It starts off with "Let me get some ice cream tonight" to "One drink with the buddies" and in a few days, you are back to your old habits.

Does maintenance mean one slice of cake a week? Or three? What if you are on vacation? Is this what adult life is about - rationing treats?

The issue of being at the two extremes and confused about the middle is a real one. Any solution is going to come from you figuring out what works for you in your context.

Weight loss is never the problem. You being gung-ho for a few weeks will kick things off. Keeping the weight you lost is a much harder nut to crack. Losing weight consistently is another hard problem.

I have a tool in mind for you. Remember, this tool will work for you but that doesn't mean you disregard other tools like "No sugar for a month". Learning to figure out when to use what tool is on you. I'll help, of course.

What's the issue?

For most of us, when we are in the "No" zone, things are clear. You have made your decision on all the eating. Are you gonna eat ice cream tonight - nope? Are you gonna eat some cake - nope. With clarity and reduced decision fatigue, you can move on to a clearer head. But with the end of the diet, with the strain of a few weeks, we veer into the grey.

And when we are in the grey, where exactly are we? That's the issue.

That's what my tool will help you address.

Find your 'delta'

Your current eating, if we were to score it, might be a 50. Or it might be 90. Or a 10.

For a few weeks, you make it a 100! Nuts. But the bigger the difference, the delta, the harder it is to make it sustainable.

If instead, we could arrive at a significant but not crazy delta, you will figure out what's sustainable for you and maintain your weight. Or in all probability, keep losing weight.

Start by scoring

To figure out where to go, you start by seeing where you are.

Let's say you are a "3 meals a day" person. You score each meal as a zero or a one.

What's a zero?

* if you ate anything fried, that's a zero.

* if you ate anything sweet, that's a zero.

* if you ate anything that came in a box (cereal, for example), that's a zero.

* Else, it is a one. Simple!

First, we take stock of where you are today. Starting tomorrow, you score yourself for the next 7 days. This system works best if you don't change anything up for this week. Keep your behaviour as it has been, and see what the score is at the end of the week.

In the above example, I had a great start to the week on Monday. And I am doing pretty well except at dinner. And by Friday, even lunch is getting off hand.

But that's fine. You learn two things immediately - your pattern. For me, dinner is the meal to focus on. Or of course, I could instead say let me get my breakfast and lunch sorted on all 7 days. There's no "wrong" way to go about this.

The second thing I learn is my overall score. That's 11 (total up the green blocks.)

Out of 21 i.e. 7 days x 3 meals per day = a max possible score of 21.

My goal for the next week is to get to 13 (a delta of 2.) I could do this by ensuring my breakfast on Sunday is better, and by figuring out one better dinner option over the 6 days. And keeping everything else as is.

And that's it!

Summing it up

The idea is to not go from 11 to 21 for 4 weeks and then come crashing back down to 11. This is what most of you do. And so, you end up putting back all the weight you lost.

My focus is more long-term. I want you to start thinking months and years, rather than weeks. To do that, you figure out your current score. And while you might still use the tools of "4 weeks of no sugar" and so on, you will come back to this tool to transition back to reality. And instead of going to an arbitrary number, you will always come back to your baseline, or preferably your baseline + a delta.

For example, let's say your score is 11. For the next 3 weeks, you keep it at a 13. And then for whatever reason, you decide to follow the paleo diet for 4 weeks. Great, whatever.

Now, once that diet ends, you get back to this tool and you aim to keep your score at 15.

There's nothing magical about 15. 14 might work as well too. But what won't work is too high a number i.e. 19.

Over the long term, you will find that your baseline has changed. From 11 in Aug 2022, you will find yourself at 17 in Aug 2023 and 19 in Aug 2024. While that might sound ridiculous, keep this simple fact in mind - you want to stay healthy for a long time, a number you think in years and decades. And the only way to do that is to have more sensible habits than not.

To close it out

You can download it here.

Remember, this is a tool. "No sugar for a month" is a tool. Use the tool that's appropriate for you at the right time. For the long-term, frameworks work better than tools - you should check out Daily9 for that. Full disclosure: I am one of the principals behind the D9 and it is what I use for figuring out what my 85% is.

Today’s post is about listening to your body.

You’ve had Monday morning blues, you’ve had hunger pangs, you’ve had butterflies in your stomach, you’ve had your heart broken - they all feel a certain way. The complex emotions and thoughts and feelings combine with the physical structure to provide a complex signal.

Your body is zillions of chemical reactions. And these chemical reactions produce subtle sensations on the organic machine that is our body. Some, like a headache, we immediately recognise. Some, we don’t. And we also tend to ignore some for extended periods of time that we don’t know them anymore.

In today’s post, I hope to get you to start changing this today.

An amazing organic machine

Your body is an organic machine. Everything you do to it:

* what foods do you eat

* how much and how well do you move

* how much sleep it gets, quantity and quality

* the emotions that you engage in

All these are part of the great organic chemistry that happens inside. When you are angry, your body feels a different way. You feel the rage heat up inside you and it pours out of you as expletives at the jackass who cut you off on the road. Every emotion, every feeling, every thought, every arising has a longer tail. Especially because we indulge in them and let them.

Food and activity have a direct response from the body as well. You eat poor foods, and your body doesn't have the highest quality ingredients to do the chemical processes inside. It generates more gunk and goop, which need to be cleared out. But since you aren't doing the actions required for that, the body figures out a way around it as well.

Parallels

The parallels between how humans behave on the Earth and how the body behaves are funnily similar. You have a factory that focuses on "cheapest ingredients" and it produces a ton of waste. Since you want to maximise the money, you dispose of the waste by dumping it into a river or whatever. It is not your problem anymore but it is a problem nonetheless.

The crap you do to your body produces more crap. When you don't do enough to undo it, when you don't use the highest quality labour, or pay them well enough, or treat them well enough, or give them the weekends off and however you wanna extend the analogy - you are thinking short-term.

Sudden

Where do these sudden heart attacks come from? The human body is complex and science has good models and explanations of how it works but is nowhere close to a complete working model. That said, a good chunk of the fundamentals are known. You don't need to worry about this supplement or that pill yet - start with the fundamentals.

The input to the system has been sub-par for a LONG time and you haven't paid enough attention to the subtle signals that the body has been sending you. And it tips over some day.

What signals? For example,

* headaches and migraines

* poor pooping

* not sleeping enough

* fatigue

* mood swings

* muscle and joint aches and pains

* brain getting slower and fuzzier

* skin looking poorer

and 100s of other things that we tend to dismiss.

Heart attacks, as they get your attention, are an accumulation of plaque formation over years of poor habits and a lot of things going wrong in the system. Hypertension is nothing but your blood vessels becoming more rigid because you are being an ass, and the heart needs to pump faster. And it is a vicious cycle.

Pay attention. Listen!

You can start by paying more attention to your body.

You don't need to get caught up in the wearable craze and get the latest 17 different gadgets that track everything. While they are useful, the first step is for you to start paying attention to yourself.

Are you feeling good when you wake up?

Are your emotions stable and/or more positive?

Is your skin looking better, or is it getting duller? Do you find yourself scratching a significant amount of time?

Are you looking fatigued?

EVERYTHING that your body is doing is a signal. From the gross to the subtle, it is a signal.

Let's take another example - barefoot running. When I run barefoot, I am forced into running efficiently. Why? Because any poor technique will immediately result in pain and my body will correct itself or the pain makes me stop running. But with the stupid shoes we all wear, the cushioning impairs this feedback and so you think all is well.

All is not well.

Shoes or pills are dampening the signal and distorting it. They are not a true fix. They are a necessary tool when things get terrible. Not everyone is made for barefoot running because you've spent many decades ruining your foot (and up the chain as well.) Likewise, you might need pills to correct/stabilise a condition. And that's fine. It is what it is.

But don't expect that to be the solution.

The solution is paying attention and listening to your body.

The solution is for you to take control.

The solution is for you to become a self-experiment artist.

Yes, you can pay me a lot of money for me to tell you what to do. And yes, you will see results. And that's ample for most people.

But I think, like personal finances and family relationships, these are things that you need to put a lot of time and effort in. In addition to having expert guidance.

Your turn

What is your body telling you?

Start a simple daily log. Jot down various signals you are getting.

A sugar craving at 10 am - is a signal.

Stiff lower back when you get up after driving to work - it is a signal.

Don't diagnose it. Don't try to get to a solution.

Start with listening!

That’s it for this week! Before you go, share this post in ONE of your WhatsApp groups. I truly appreciate it.

Hope your Sunday is going well. I had a relaxed start to my Sunday, after having a lot of cake last evening. Right after I hit publish, gonna head out and get my training sorted, so I can get back to that cake later in the evening.

For this week, I wanted to talk to you about the demonisation of carbs.

Carbs are NOT the enemy. Junk carbs are, and we are surrounded by them. But in our regular food, carbs dominate. And the answer is not to run away from them but understand how a simple fix is all that’s needed.

Don’t be afraid of carbs. Of your rice. Of your roti. Instead, learn how to responsibly enjoy them.

What are carbs?

Traditional Indian cuisine is centred around carbs. But let's begin with what the heck are carbs.

Carbohydrates, or carbs, are sugar molecules. Along with proteins and fats, carbohydrates are one of three main nutrients found in foods and drinks.Your body breaks down carbohydrates into glucose. Glucose, or blood sugar, is the main source of energy for your body's cells, tissues, and organs. Glucose can be used immediately or stored in the liver and muscles for later use.

They are one of the 3 main nutrients that we need to consume. There are 3 forms of carbs - simple, complex, and fibre. Simple means that they are broken down into its base version with minimal fuss. Complex means that they are, well, complex structures which take a bit more breaking down. And fibre is even more complex, some of which can be broken down by the body and some which cannot.

Think of them as the houses the 3 little piggies lived in.

Pig #1 built a house full of straw and hay. Which the big bad wolf found easy to blow away. Aka simple carbs.

Pig #2 built a house with sticks. Which, while sturdier than the first house, the big bad wolf was able to break down. Aka complex carbs.

Pig #3 built a house with brick and mortar, which was impossible to blow away. Aka fibre.

Don't take the analogy too seriously i.e. you should be eating only fibre and nothing else. The analogy is to explain the chemistry that happens internally, and how quickly/easily the body converts the food you are consuming into energy.

Why do we need carbs?

They are accessible stores of energy. And your body needs energy to sustain itself.

A car takes petrol as its main item for sustenance but there's also other things going on (the oil and the brake fluid and all that.) The human body needs a mixture of different energy sources and nutrients, of which carbs are an important part.

The story of carbs starts from a long time ago - a time when energy was hard to come by, and food was not bountiful. Thousands of years ago, before we learned cooking or how to operate a fridge and all that, we had to forage for our food. The energy that we derived from foods was not infinite. In fact, most people found it difficult to meet their energy requirements for the day.

As the human race progressed technologically, we started creating foods that are high in energy (calories) that could be consumed quickly.

But we are no longer in an energy deficit i.e. to get the 1500-3000 calories that one needs for daily function is pretty easy. In fact, it is too easy, which is the problem.

Why is it too easy?

Take any regional Indian meal. It revolves around the grain - whether it is the rice or the roti variant. These would be the simple carbs.

Surrounding it are dishes that are made with lentils and legumes and tubers - all complex carbs.

The amount of protein is miniscule. The amount of fats is dependent on the style of cooking. While fats are important, they are loaded with calories. If one's not mindful, the overall energy intake of a meal goes too high. When you look at a macronutrient split, it looks like this:

* carbs: 70% ( primarily from simple, some from complex, minimally from fibre.)

* protein: 5-15%

* fats: 10-25% (from oils)

Today, our problem is NOT energy shortage but nutrient shortage.

Are carbs the enemy?

With a lot of health scares and the media doing its fucked up scaremongering, a lot of people are genuinely confused about what to do. Weight loss trends and fads and diets are always going around. Which is confusing for many of you, who are genuinely keen to improve your health and wellness.

While our body weight is correlated to our health, it is not the only deal. But it is a useful signal to pay attention to.

Our body needs energy and nutrients. Our current crisis is that we get the energy and we don't get enough nutrients.

Carbs are not the enemy, even though they seem to be. Why? Because all sources of easy energy are from carbs. Not only the rice and roti, or the lentils and dals. But every piece of junk that you eat that comes in a box or packet is simple carbs, loaded with the right amount of salt, sugar, and fat to trigger a response in your body without your control.

But let's attack junk foods another day. You already know junk foods are junk. The problem I'd like you to focus on today is how to eat well outside of junk foods.

So, back to our plate construction.

* Carbs are not the enemy - we have too much of it on our plate.

* The point is not to mindlessly cut the carbs down but to eat more of the other stuff.

* This will automatically lead to the outcome of eating less carbs.

* But that's a consequence of eating better.

* But everyone likes to portray an enemy and so, carbs have become it.

The good old fashioned solution

You need to

* eat more protein.

* eat more fibre.

* eat more vegetables.

* eat more nutrients.

* control your energy intake i.e. calories consumed.

* find the right amount of simple and complex carbs to suit that goal.

Makes sense, right.

Eat a balanced meal and have a balanced plate. Let's see how to do that.

Eat more protein. How can you eat more protein? That's an article by itself, and you can head over to the Daily9 blog for a comprehensive one.

How can you get more fibre and nutrients? Eat more vegetables. While potato, tapioca, sweet potato etc are tubers and not vegetables, let's ignore the technicalities. Instead, aim to have more than 2 colours of vegetables on your plate.

Here's a "Do this!" for you to start:

* The amount of vegetables on your plate determine the amount of rice/roti on your plate. If you have one cup of vegetables, you have one cup of rice. Want more rice? First, add more vegetables.

* The amount of protein on your plate is dependent on what you are allowed to eat. Do read the Daily9 article but as long as you can include some form of protein in every meal, you are good. Unsure what to do - paneer, eggs, curd, greek yogurt, seafood, meat - are options. Nope, dals are not protein. Go with that for now, I'll explain it another day.

* Cook your foods in minimal oil.

How much carbs to eat? A simple rule to start with is to halve the carbs on your plate. If you are hungry after eating the meal, it means you need to include more vegetables in your meal.

Let's do this!

If you'd like a diet plan, you can start over here and then make it your own.

Reducing carbs as a natural consequence of eating more nutrients and other foods.

Carbs are not the enemy. Eating too much energy is. And because our diet is built around simple carbs, it seems to be that carbs are the enemy.

An imbalanced plate is the enemy. Balance it!

And that’s it from me for this week. Have a great weekend!

In this week’s post, I want to discuss how we dismiss the sensible stuff and instead focus on the nonsensical. And I’ll use myself as an example to kick it off.

The crux of today’s post is a “Do This!” for anyone who is looking for better health and fitness and wants to just get started, or back to a routine.

If you are someone with a gym habit already, you will find the mobility and stretching routines useful.

If you have a family member who needs to get moving, you can share this post with them and they can get started, and transform their lives in the span of a few months. Of course, if they need to get medical clearance, they should do so before embarking on any workout routine.

As a beginner

Back when I was searching for "How the heck do I lose fat and get fit?", the solutions on Google ranged from the sensible and boring to the ridiculous and stupid. And in between, there were complicated solutions with a steep learning curve.

* The sensible and boring were too sensible. They recommended a slow and steady approach. They mentioned things that I knew or what common sense tells you. They didn't have any fancy gimmicks.

* The ridiculous and stupid - well, I unfortunately did not know they were ridiculous and stupid. The cayenne pepper and lemon juice detox cleanse, for example, seemed accurate to me. I was overweight. I had poor eating habits and could definitely use a cleanse and a detox, whatever that meant.

* The technically complex - I didn't know where to start. There are a ton of scientific and accurate tools to accomplish your goal and all of them work in moving you forward. When to use which tool, when to persist with the tool, when to switch it up - all of this comes only by increasing your knowledge. This comes via learning, via trial and error, and by immersing yourself and taking control.

Ridiculous and Stupid

I ignored the sensible and boring.

I didn't know where to start with the technically complex stuff. Plus, I was a grad student with a small budget, and I could not afford getting coaching or any such thing, even if I knew what.

I dived into the ridiculous and stupid. They had clear "Do This!" and were short-term, and bamboozled me with bro-science, and dazzled me with my "here's what you did wrong" list, which was unfortunately accurate.

But ...

Well, they didn't work. While they can theoretically give you some short-term results, the results are immediately wiped off when you go back to routine.

And they were frankly horrific and masochistic. But one endures because of the blame and "Yep, I need to do something hard and harsh and dramatically different" along with "Can I see immediate results?"

What Worked

Joining a running group and working on a running plan with a coach and community - which would fall into "technically complex" - was what finally made an impact. I continued that with more of the same, by joining San Francisco CrossFit. By now, I could afford to pay for these things. I continued to veer away from the sensible stuff.

Only when I combined the two did I truly change. I had coaching and guidance to help me on the technically complex stuff, on both the fitness and nutrition front. And based on my research and experiments, I realised that the fundamentals of almost everything I was doing was rooted in the 'sensible and boring'.

With that, we finally get to the crux of this post.

The post is aimed at folks who want to do something to get their fitness together, with a "Do This!" plan. If you've tried multiple things and not seen results, or are just starting off and don't know where to go - well, here's a place to start.

Before we begin, some guidelines.

* Sensible and boring is sensible. And boring.

* The bells and whistles will be minimal.

* It will not be a short-term thing.

* Do this steadily and you'll figure things out along the way.

A Workout/Activity/Exercise Plan

The plan comprises of:

* A mobility routine. Given our stressful lives, the amount of time spent sitting and/or in poor postures, we need to gently get our joints and our body to move and find their range of motion. Observe your breathing and the tension in your body while you do this. Focus on being as relaxed as you can, and never hold your breath.

* A stretching routine. Our muscles get stiffer and tighter (and weaker) due to our limited movements and posture. Equally important to spend some time stretching. This will also aid you in sleeping better and calming your nervous system down.Focus on a relaxed breath during the stretching. At no point should you be stiff or holding your breath.

* An activity routine. Our body needs to move and any safe movement will do the job. You don't need to start a kettlebell routine, or join a S&C facility. While that's a great idea, it is not necessary just yet (or maybe ever.)

Let's get into more details.

The mobility routine

* Here's my curated playlist on YouTube specifically for you.

* Download a timer app and run it for 60 seconds of work and 10 seconds of rest, and for 15 rounds. There's 15 moves in there. Do each for 1 minute.

* Focus on your breath throughout the routine. You want to breathe in a nice and calm fashion, into your diaphragm. This means your belly will expand gently as you inhale. Your chest moves minimally.

* Observe where you are holding tension as you do this routine, and slowly relax those areas and just ease into the mobility routine.

The progression will be:

* 60 seconds of work and 10 seconds of rest.

* 90 seconds of work and 10 seconds of rest.

* 2 minutes of work and 15 seconds of rest.

* 2 circuits of Step #3.

The stretching routine

It will take you about 15 minutes.

Here are the drills in my curated playlist.

* The neck stretch, do it for 60 seconds/side.

* Then, spend 90 seconds on the elephant walk.

* After that, spend 90 seconds/side on the couch stretch.

* And then, 2 minutes/side on the glute stretch.

* Wrap up with the calf stretch for 90 seconds/side.

Remember, be as relaxed as you can and focus on your breath. Do not hold your breath at all. And keep working on letting go of tension. Do not force range but allow it to improve naturally.

The Routine

Day 1

* Start with 15 minutes of mobility.

* As soon as you are done with the mobility routine, head out for a 45-minute walk. During the walk, breathe through your nose only (unless you have medical reasons not to.)

Day 2

* Start with 15 minutes of stretching.

* Immediately after that, head out for a 45-minute walk. Be as relaxed about it and do not worry about setting a pace.

Day 3

* Start with the stretching routine.

* And then, move on to the mobility routine.

* And then, head out for a 20-minute brisk walk. Keep breathing via the nose but focus on a brisker pace today. Let your arms and legs swing freely (not violently) and help you set the pace.

Day 4

Repeat Day 1

Day 5

Repeat Day 2

Day 6

Repeat Day 3

Day 7

Chill. Or if you missed a day, you can do that here.

How do you progress

When you are able to do the above plan comfortably, here's how you can progress on the three different components.

On the mobility component, you will

* Go from 60 seconds of work to 90 seconds per each movement.

* When 90 seconds is comfortable, move that up to 2 minutes per movement.

* When that is comfortable, you will do the mobility routine every morning.

On the stretching component, you will

* Do the stretches 3 times per week.

* Do the stretches 5 times per week.

* Do the stretches 4 times per week in the morning, and 3 times per week in the evening.

On the activity component, you will

* Start with 45 minutes of relaxed walking.

* Increase that to 60 minutes.

* And then increase that to 75 minutes.

And on the brisk walking, you will go from 20 minutes to 30 minutes to 45 minutes.

In 4 months, your weekly routine might look like:

Day 1

* Start the morning off with the mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

* Immediately after that, you will head out for a 60 minute relaxed walk.

* You will stretch for 15 minutes in the evening.

Day 2

* Start off the day with your mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

* Immediately after that, you will head out for a 75-minute relaxed walk.

Day 3

* Start the morning off with the mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

* Immediately after that, you will head out for a 45-minute brisk walk.

* You will stretch for 15 minutes in the evening.

Day 4

* Start off the day with your mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

* Immediately after that, you will head out for a 45-minute relaxed walk.

Day 5

* Start the morning off with the mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

* Immediately after that, you will head out for a 30-minute run-walk.

* You will stretch for 15 minutes in the evening.

Day 6

* You will spend 45 minutes doing surya namaskaram.

Where did this come from?!? Well, why not? You've been into a great routine for a few months now, and you can add this in once a week.

Day 7

* Start the morning off with the mobility component. You will spend 2 minutes per each move.

And if you missed any session in the week, you will catch up on it.

To close the loop

What results will you see?

* your joints will have increased range of motion.

* your muscles will be more flexible.

* your breathing pattern will be better.

* your nervous system will be more calm and relaxed.

* your stress levels will be lower.

* you will see fat loss, due to a combination of the above factors and the increased calorie expenditure.

* you will look and feel much better.

* you will not be stuck in a rut, regarding your fitness routine.

Remember, you are being way ahead of the curve when you choose the sensible route. You might not see crazy results that go on a poster but you will see incredible results if you can let go of expectations, and instead focus on how you feel each day.

You can take a video of you doing some of the mobility work and stretches during your first week, and compare them to you doing them 3 months later. In fact, I highly recommend it.

The time commitment might seem rather high, and it is inevitable you might not be able to do the entire routine daily. But aim to do at least the mobility or the stretching component each day.

Take control. Do this! Transform your life and your health and how you feel by starting off today. Commit to doing this for 3 months, and you will never look back.

And that’s it for this week. See you next weekend!

Today’s post is about habits and addictions. We are all addicted to things, and I don’t mean any clinical addictions. Whether they are de-stressing mechanisms or old habits that have not gone away, we cannot contemplate life without them. In all probability, we don’t even think about them. They just are a part of our lives.

I learned a valuable lesson when I was able to stay away from my addiction. That lesson enabled me to do the same multiple times in my life, as and when I needed it.

Read on to learn about and cultivate a valuable tool that could potentially change your life.

Cannot contemplate life without you

All of us have a few things - an activity, a food, a pleasure, a habit - that we indulge in often. To contemplate the notion of not doing that might not even be computable. It leads to saying things like "Life won't be worth living" or "I am fine dying a couple of years early" or some such thing.

It is worth your while to break the cycle and deprive yourself of your crutch. Whether it is a glass of red wine with dinner, or your post-meal cigarette, or a TV show with dinner, or dessert. Doesn't matter what it is. There's no judgment at all.

It is a tool and a tool you can use to learn a deeper skill. That you can deprive yourself and be comfortable with the discomfort.

CrossFit

Back in 2008, I was neck deep in my love affair with CrossFit. It had been close to 15 months since I had started and I still loved it. I looked forward to going to my gym every single day.

After starting from zero, I had progressed pretty well after the initial few months. My conditioning and skill had improved leaps and bounds. I had lost a lot of weight and was leaner, and more athletic. But my strength levels were still lagging far behind.

Raj kept prodding me to make the shift to lifting heavy and working on my gaps. But I resisted. Because I could not contemplate not going to my CrossFit sessions. I was scared that I'd let go of what had transformed my life and do something else that I was not that keen on, and then spiral back towards my old life. Every week, I'd tell him that I would do it but would always chicken out.

It took me 3-4 months to take the plunge. I still remember it took me close to an hour to write a 3-line email to Kelly Starrett about taking a break and doing something else. Kelly was generous and understanding and responded back rather immediately.

From 6 days a week to zero

The shift from CrossFit to Starting Strength is night and day. One is about a lot of variety and kitchen sink and lactic work. High volume, medium-to-light load and getting high on dopamine. The other is low volume, high load with lots and lots of rest, and you barely break a sweat.

I grumbled. I whined. I wanted to go to a couple of classes a week to SFCF. But I knew that was not part of the plan. I needed to work on getting stronger - much much stronger than I was. And doing anything besides the recommended protocol would impair my progress and learning.

I learned to suck it up. I ambled into a love affair with heavy lifting. With CrossFit, it was love at first sight. Doing a 25-minute AMRAP takes a specific kind of crazy. Doing 5 x 5 of a load that's twice your bodyweight takes a different kind of crazy. Both build awesomeness in you.

I spent a year working on my gaps. I put up respectable numbers on the barbell's fundamental movements - the squat, the deadlift, the bench press and the military press.

What I learned

Taking SFCF to zero was a huge life lesson for me.

Yes, I could've done my Starting Strength and one day of CrossFit without much damage. In fact, with my knowledge today, I know it could've been beneficial. Back then, I didn't know that and it was a good thing too.

It made me fall in love with the larger idea of strength and conditioning, of general fitness. It helped me realise that I could train on my own, and not just ride the energy of a group class. It made me learn on my own and figure out how to periodise my training, how to read a training plan and contextualise it for myself, and how to set goals, when to push and when to back off.

Without immersing myself in this new mode of training, I wouldn't have been able to do all that.

I realise it taught me that I can stop doing anything. It has allowed me to push my levels of discomfort. A few of the experiments that I have done include:

* not consuming sugar for more than a month.

* not consuming alcohol for more than a month.

* not reading (gasp!) for more than a week.

* not eating meat for more than a year.

* not watching TV for a month.

Giving up SFCF made me realise that I could go to zero on many things that I thought non-negotiable to have as part of my life. This is a valuable life skill.

Your turn

List out the top 2 things that you find hard to contemplate to be without. And prep yourself to do it for a week or a month. You'll learn something cool about yourself.

That’s it for this week! Have a great weekend, and I’ll see you next Sunday.

Hope your Sunday is going well. Mine’s off to a slow start but isn’t that the point of a weekend. It took me a bit of time to get my brain firing and to assemble my random thoughts into some semblance of cohesion.

Topics like climate change and the invasiveness of the human species are ones I’ve thought about for a relatively long time. And sometimes that connects with something I am actually a reasonable expert on - me, fitness and that kinda stuff.

This week’s post delves into why looking at our lives with a different perspective of time can be beneficial.

Inspiration

Nature is our biggest inspiration. The cars we've created came from horse-drawn carriages. All the machines we create are a copy of our bodies. The computer has a brain, has an input, has an output, has a power source. All machines have a circulatory system, with essential nutrients transmitted through them.

Advances

We've made advances. Taming a horse, to then tying together a bunch of horses and putting a box behind them, to electric cars. But electric cars, while an improvement on the internal combustion engine, aren't self-sustaining. The fuel they use comes from an external source.

The human machine also relies on external sources (food and water and sunlight) for sustenance. And it generates waste products via exhalation and excretion.

The colossal difference in the natural environment is in how all the variables fit together. You put four wolves and you can fix an ecosystem as large as Yellowstone. You remove an apex predator or introduce an alien species and the ecosystem collapses (in the short-term.)

Timescale

One limitation in our progress is our handicap of looking at time. Using one hundred years as a lifetime, we tend to focus on short durations. The disruptions we are producing i.e. the variables in the system we are affecting are unbeknownst to us.

Climate change is a straightforward example of the human brain looking at technological progress, without adequate thought to disruption of other variables in the system over a much larger span of time.

Another example is the construction of houses and the encroachment of the city into various catchment areas in my hometown of Madras. What used to be marshland or natural water catchment areas are now clumps of apartments. The water table has a band-aid - water is being brought from other areas. The recent floods happened because of a lack of catchment areas. But that's beyond a point of no return. So, storm drains all over the city are being constructed.

Timescale in our lives

In our own lives, we tend to make similar mistakes. In fitness and nutrition, we want results immediately. We want to get on a diet, and we want to see weight loss. We want to lift weights or do yoga, and get the results as shown in the marketing and promos.

The prospect of losing 1 kilo per month does not seem exciting to a person wanting weight loss. But 24 months ago, if you had gotten started on this "slow, steady, sustainable" approach, you would be 24 kilos lighter. All done in a sensible, practical fashion with none of the detrimental effects of a crash diet.

Learn a new language in a matter of weeks or learn cooking in a month or whatever are simple examples of a marketing scheme playing to our weakness. Of wanting change right NOW! Is any skill truly possible to learn in a matter of weeks? Yes, you can learn the starting point but only constant, consistent practice will lead to a semblance of real skill.

We need a paradigm shift in internal thought of how to look at time. Else, we will continue to make erroneous judgments. The funny thing with this is it is much harder to do when we have more time.

In my 20s, I was in a bigger rush. My 30s, I slowed down a bit but I was still too caught up and unaware. As I get into the 40s, finally some light is starting to shine. I don't need to master the kettlebell by the end of this year. I don't need to read all the books on my unread list by the end of this month.

Everything I add has a consequence that could impact quite a few more years and things than I realise today. Falling in love with fitness in my mid-20s has had an impact for 15+ years and will continue to do so for the rest of my life, in all probability. But 15 years ago, I was in a rush to lose fat and get fit, whatever that meant.

Today, I know I could've saved time and energy if I had taken things slower, focused on technique, stuck on one thing for longer before moving on. The same lessons hold, for whatever new endeavour I get involved in. Nothing needs to be rushed and made to happen today.

Slow down

What is something you can slow down on?

What is something you can take your time to learn because it will echo for the rest of your life?

Two simple things come to my mind. Learning to cook and learning to meditate. Cooking is a skill I have not focused on or made any concerted attempt to learn. Meditation is a skill that I have made a concerted attempt to learn but I am flabbergasted by my cluelessness. But now I know, there's no rush. I can work on something for a year, and if that doesn't work, I can move on to a different technique or method.

Concerted effort, proper awareness, patience, diligence. These are constants. When you add this to an appropriate timescale, zooming out rather than zooming in, we can actually make significant progress.

At least, that's what I am telling myself about meditation and cooking.

See ya next week!

Hope you are having a great Sunday so far.

Last week, I published a post about 3 months of learnings from the Indian club. I realised that the videos related to the post were not showing up properly. My apologies for that. That’s been fixed. You can see the post over here. And for your convenience, I’ve re-shared below the article for the week in this post as well. Apologies for a shoddy job.

This week’s primary piece is about a key factor in picking up and sticking to new habits and routines. To truly learn about habits, you should most certainly pick up James Clear’ amazing book Atomic Habits. My article is about one (or two) things that I’ve seen in my experience with myself and why things stick. Hope you like it!

What’s a key factor in crafting new habits and routines, and sticking to them?

It is easy if you are having fun

Breaking old patterns and habits, and creating new ones is absolutely essential to keep improving. A couple of weeks back, I wrote about crafting a new routine to delay my morning coffee. In that scenario, science played a key role. I realised that the key was to raise the internal body temperature, and not the caffeine. So, hot water immediately on waking up helps. I realised that I need to give it some time for adenosine to clear from the system, to avoid a crash later in the day. So, heading out after the hot water to get some sunlight came in. Throw in walking the dog or jumping rope or doing some crawls, one can add a 45-60 minute delay to the coffee organically.

Compared to starting a fitness routine from scratch, delaying the morning coffee is easier. Even though the science behind why you need to get daily activity or strength train is solid, there are a lot more hurdles to figure out and contextualise.

One simple factor that helps in picking up a new routine or habit is if it is fun. For example, back in 2007, I found CrossFit exhilarating and fun. Especially compared to the boring gym, littered with machines. It was easy to go and workout. I literally would jump out of bed and start thinking about how much fun I was going to have at SFCF. I would go to bed the previous night excited like a little kid about the next morning. This fuelled my first 3 months. By then, I had seen improvements in my general fitness, had integrated into the community, and it was a part of my daily routine.

But some new habits and routines are awkward and disruptive. The delay of the morning coffee, or skipping sugar/alcohol for a month, or skipping watching TV for a few weeks, or eating dinner 3 hours before bed (the latest one I am trialing out) are not really fun.

But it all comes down to results

All of it eventually comes down to results.

If we see results, then the habit sticks. If we don't see results, then the habit fails.

Results can mean a plethora of things. In a gym habit, results might be weight loss, or strength gain. Or it could be sleeping better, or having more energy, or gaining self-confidence, or being in a positive environment. It can be anything.

But if the results don't exist, it is impossible to build a habit.

Will it stick forever?

It is funny how this works. But many times, something works so well for us that we stop doing it.

The habit works so well that you have a paradigm shift. And because you are mentally now in a new place, you forget the fundamentals. You forget why you started doing what you were doing in the first place. You get cocky or distracted or whatever.

And you stop doing it.

The fix is simple. Get back to what worked for you.

A simple example is a training plan that does wonders for you. You get stronger and leaner. Your endurance improves. You are not beat up. You are not spending hours together at the gym. It works so well that you get excited and decide to do a much harder and more intense one. Which, after a few weeks, starts becoming harder to follow. And you start skipping days. And a few months later, you are doing random workouts and your results have stopped.

Start again.

The solution to any of this is simple.

This applies especially for foundational elements for us. Strength training is my keystone habit. A lot of things are built around it. If I get distracted and move away and do something else, let's say play 6 days of badminton - sooner or later, I know many of my other lifestyle decisions will suffer.

Start again.

Stop when it stops working for you

You stop doing something when it no longer works for you. And that's necessary. It was a tool that did a job. Now, you move on to a different tool.

But some go deeper. While CrossFit was a tool for a couple of years, it led me to kettlebell training which has been a mainstay of my life for a decade and more. Anytime I veer away, I realise other things slip up.

Sticking to something simply out of habit or nostalgia is unnecessary. Your loyalty is to yourself.

And so

* To craft a new routine, having fun is useful. Where possible, start here.

* Science helps. As in the delayed coffee example.

* But it all comes down to results. If you see results (which can be umpteen things), you will stick to it.

* Be aware that you will stop doing something because it works so well for you.

* And be aware that other times you will keep doing something long after it has stopped working for you.

* Start again!

3 months of Indian clubs

The Indian Club

Everything old is new again.

The Indian Club has been around for a long time in physical culture. It seems to have been used primarily in Persia and India, a favourite amongst wrestlers. It was taken to the West by British soldiers who saw the physical fitness of Indian soldiers, who used the clubs to train regularly.

The term club is an oversimplification - there are various forms it can take. From extremely light and small ones that weigh half a kilo to 30 kilos. They are known as mudgars and meels and gada, all of which are variants with their specific uses. Wikipedia tells me that there are mentions of the mudgar in 4th century BC texts.

This is not a deep dive into the clubs, as I am not an expert on them. I've been practicing them for about 3-4 months only. But I am an expert in kettlebells and in movement. During these few months of practice, I realised the complementary nature of the club to my kettlebell practice.

In this article, I wanted to share my learnings so far.

Why clubs?

And why now? They've been around forever. Growing up in Tamil Nadu, I've seen and heard of the karalakattai (the club), along with silambam (a bamboo staff).

I like to play. I like to practice new skills. Ever since I stopped playing Ultimate (pandemic), this was a huge gap in my training. I realised this was a great opportunity to learn something, and after my usual bout of overthinking and analysis, I settled on the club.

But ...

I didn't know anything about the club. I wasn't entirely sure what they were used for. I knew that Brett Jones and Gray Cook had an old video series with Dr Ed Thomas, which I got my hands on. They recommend very light clubs and focus on the pattern and the speed. So, I bought two light clubs on Amazon.

Dr. Ed Thomas calls it brain training.  Performing opposing, alternating and symmetrical patterns lights up neural space and creates learning opportunities.

I also found a series of videos by Chip Conrad. He used heavier clubs, and also gave the idea for making my own clubs.

That's where I ran into my first glitch. He recommended going into Home Depot and picking up two stout pipes and connecting them. Except there's no Home Depot in India. And the local hardware stores do not just sell these kinda pipes. Thankfully, I had a friend step in and voila, I had two heavier clubs.

The question of equipment was sorted. The question of what the heck to do was sorted via these two video guides.

Now, finally, I was ready to play around with them. No pressure, no outcomes, but simply spending 45-60 minutes three times a week, screwing around. Aka playing.

Pattern overlap

For the first 6 weeks I strictly followed the textbook. I spent time with the light clubs, working on the basic patterns. The goal was not to hit myself in the head and knock myself out.

Movement is movement, and while the clubs were extremely new to me, there was fascinating overlap in some movement patterns.

I wrote down my learnings in my training journal, and I wanted to see how I could structure my club sessions. My primary training plan is kettlebell ballistics i.e. swings and snatches. Which I did 3 days of the week.

The other 4 days, clubs! And over the next 6 weeks, I intuitively trained with the clubs to put together a bunch of stuff.

The rest of the article talks about the patterns, the complementary nature of the clubs and the kettlebell, and in particular, how after a decade of kettlebell ballistics, the club was useful for me to add layers to my training.

While the article might require an intermediate level of knowledge of the kettlebell swing, I believe that using the clubs as a complementary tool for a newbie will help them learn the ballistics better and faster.

Let me explain.

The grip

The grip is important in the kettlebell swing and snatch. Your grip strength generally gives out in long sets, as you fail to understand what tension and relaxation means. The bell is constantly pulling away from you, at the top and at the bottom and you are fighting it.

The grip in the club is moderately awkward. Your pinky goes around the bottom portion of the handle which bulges slightly, and you should maintain a moderate to tight grip throughout, lest you throw the club away.

When you catch the club, or just hold it upright, or parallel to the floor - well, suffice to say you will be working your grip strength.

Patterning and Recovery

You can see me do a few swings as well.

The light club allows me to do 100s of reps of the swing, which greatly aided my recovery, as well as hone the patterning for the swing/clean/snatch.

This left me with zero soreness between my training sessions, and gave me a chance to play around with my bottom position quite a bit.

Timing

One of the harder skills to learn in the swing is timing. Most beginners tend to hinge too early.

The ideal way to do the swing is to play chicken with the kettlebell.

You swing the bell and it goes to the top position, and then starts its progress on the way down. What most beginners do at this stage is unlock the hip. What you should be doing is standing in your plank and letting the kettlebell come at your tenders (you cannot get hit, unless you try very hard.) And at the last possible instant, you hinge explosively.

Hard to do when you have a cannonball attacking the family jewels, especially as a beginner. Plus, unless you analyse your video, you won't realise that you are doing this.

Much much easier to do with the club. It gives you instant feedback when you hinge early - the club hits the floor.

Anti-shrug

Shrugging is another common issue. Most of us have overactive traps/neck and we tend to stiffen them up way too much.

Shrug your shoulders i.e. get them to touch your ears. This is the up position. Now, relax. This is the neutral position. Now, anti-shrug! Do the opposite of the up position!

The anti-shrug is a position you need to learn not just for kettlebell ballistics alone. Training with the clubs makes this so much easier to learn.

The Lockout

Kime, as Pavel refers to it. The top of the swing is a crisp finish. In Simple and Sinister, Pavel uses the example of a flipbook. Imagine you have a 100 page book, with one frame/image per page. As you flip through the book, it goes from the bottom of the swing to the top of the swing.

The inexperienced athlete starts tensing rather early. In the beginning, you start tensing before page 50. But as you get better and better, you realise that a ballistic movement like the swing requires the right level of tension. And it is not a 10/10. Coach Dan John instructs us that it is closer to a 4/10. So, you focus on getting tense closer to the 90th page, or even the 95th page.

And the lockout is every bit of you below the neck in a standing plank. Your feet are rooted into the floor. Your kneecaps are pulled up. Your glutes are tight. Your lats are on. Your armpits are screwed in. You are anti-shrugged. Your abs are braced. While you do some of these throughout the movement (rooting, for example), they come to a perfect finish at the top of the swing.

Beginners of the kettlebell swing will tense when the hips lockout and not have their abs fully on at the top of the swing. What happens is you see a lean of the upper body, from the hips to the shoulders. Instead, what you can think of as finishing the swing TWICE. Once, at the hip snap and second, at the topmost point of the kettlebell swing - the one frame before which the bell starts to drop. At that frame, you want to freeze the bell with your abs and lats!

The Indian Club teaches you to do this. You swing the club forward and your hips are locked. And then, you stop the club and that's the top of the swing. Your abs, your grip, your lats make this happen!

The weight shift at the bottom

There is a subtle weight shift that happens in the kettlebell swing. You start off with the weight being perfectly balanced over your foot. As the bell swings down and behind you, there is a shift towards the heel. Why? Well, you have a cannonball accelerating down and behind you. Your feet and toes are still on the floor - the shift is towards the heel but the full foot is still active.

With the clubs, it becomes simple to feel the heel shift. The arm and the club form a line going behind you, perfectly in line with your hip hinge. And the club, being rather long subtly accentuates the weight shift as well, as it drags that moment along. This gives your body enough time to adjust and go with the movement.

The arms, shoulders, lats at the bottom

In addition to the weight shift of the heel, the arms and shoulders move into a good position - pulled along by the club. With the kettlebell, beginners tend to over-grip or not allow the movement to happen, or sometimes, it just happens too fast. But here, the movement is a tad slower and longer, which allows you to anti-shrug at the bottom and let the arms elongate. And you can feel the stretch i.e. the chest reaches forward while the hip reaches back.

The lightness of the club and the slightly elongated range of motion allows all of these learnings to sink in. With high volume work being an option that does not gas you out or trash your hamstrings, you pattern the movement rather than do terrible reps when you are tired.

Fun!

For me, it has been a lot of fun to play and learn a new skill.

And simply brilliant to see the complementary nature and take away quite a bit within 3 months.

After a decade (and a bit more) of working on the kettlebell swing, it has been a delight to see the club allow me to deepen my learnings and learn the nuances in a same-but-different fashion.

The rest of the year, the plan is to continue along the same vein. Keep my primary training days as kettlebell swings and snatches, and play with the Indian clubs on my other days. I'll post an update towards the end of the year!

And that’s it for this week. See you next Sunday!

Hope your weekend is off to a good start.

I was laid out by COVID over the past week and some, and that’s why there was no post last Sunday. Today’s the first day I am feeling close to normal, and finally able to sit down and write.

On to the two things for this week.

* Hustle. There’s nothing wrong with hustle. There will be a time in our lives when we need to throw balance out the window. But constantly craving something else - should that be part of the bargain? I think not.

* Delaying the morning coffee. My 8-week experiment with delaying my morning coffee. Something I would not have thought possible at all.

Hustle Hustle Hustle

Hustle is right. Hustle is the only way to get ahead. Without hustling, what are you doing?!?!?

Hustle culture teaches us that there's always more: more money to make, a bigger title or promotion and a higher wall to climb.

We get confused between hard work and application versus the constant craving and desire for more.

You must work smart and work hard. Sometimes, it means you put in 12+ hour days, or work over the weekends. Mark Cuban famously talks about not taking a vacation in 4 years, and I know a startup founder whose early years were similar.

But when you go overboard, when your kids stop recognising you, when you are burning all your relationships - what's the point of it?

While there will always be imbalance, there must be balance in the imbalance. A vacation balances out overworking. But if that's the constant cycle i.e. 12-hour days for 6 months followed by 2 weeks off, eventually that's gonna fail.

In the gym, there will always be more iron to lift. New moves to learn. More body fat to lose. More stunts to do. More time to shave in your workouts.

But more-more-more is not the answer to whatever question you are seeking to answer.

As we oscillate between work and rest (and to copy Coach Dan John, don't forget play and pray), we should aim to find all four parts. When that balance is not present, s**t comes crashing down.

Hustle is not wrong. But indefinite hustle, when you are sacrificing all that’s important to you for the next shiny object, that seems wrong.

Where's my coffee?!

I am someone who needs their cup of coffee as soon as they wake up. My first 10 minutes of every day is spent brewing my cup. A lifelong habit of “coffee first”, I used to start my day looking like a zombie and walking over to my coffee maker. Over the past decade, given my rather strange waking up time (3.45 am), I have come to depend on the morning coffee. Even though I do wake up rather alert, I get anxious if I cannot have coffee before I head to coach.

In fact, I am used to having 2 cups before I leave to coach. And quite often, take a third cup in my coffee flask to sip on during the next 3 hours.

If you are dependent on your coffee, are prone to energy crashes during the day, read on. I'll explain how you can use your coffee to your advantage, reduce your energy crashes, fall asleep faster and sleep better.

Heat, not the coffee

Here is a fact that I already know - it takes a few minutes for the coffee to make its way into your system. The effect is not instantaneous. There is a bit of a placebo effect going on.

I learned a bit more about the mechanism from Dr Andrew Huberman. I learned that a key factor behind waking up with a hot mug of coffee is the heat. It raises the internal body temperature.

As part of our waking up process, our body temperature goes up. Which is why, most often, you will find that you wake up with your hands and feet outside of the sheets when you wake up. You are feeling a bit warm and exposing a few bits helps you feel not so warm.

How coffee itself works is that the molecules go and sit into receptors where another molecule (adenosine) goes and sits. Adenosine inhibits arousal and when you wake up, there are bits of it floating around. They generally get cleared in a bit but before they get cleared, we have the coffee. So, they are mucking about with nowhere to go. Much later in the day, when the coffee wears out, we feel sleepy because the adenosine is going to those receptors. To beat them away, we have more coffee.

Fascinating, right?!

A new mental model

So, contrary to what I used to believe, here's how the system works.

* A mug of hot liquid raises the internal body temperature. Raising internal body temperature is part of the body's natural process of waking up.

* Caffeine blocks receptors of adenosine. The more sleep debt you have, the more adenosine there is floating around your system. It is important that the adenosine is cleared from the system. Caffeine temporarily negates the effect but it leads to a crash later in the day.

* Delaying your morning coffee by 1-2 hours after waking up is a great idea.

Well, easier said than done. How does one actually go about it? Well, based on two months of experimentation, here are my learnings.

A new morning routine

* As soon as you wake up, have a glass of hot water. You can add some lemon or ginger or vinegar to it, if you like. But the key is the temperature of the fluid is hot.

* Assuming the sun is out, go out immediately and get some sun. You don't need to be in direct sunlight, you don't need to get into a staring match with the sun. Be outside, in the presence of sunlight. If you wake up before the sun is up, switch on bright overhead lights in your house as you go about your morning.

* Walk for 15 minutes. Again, nothing aggressive. But get some movement going.

* Throw in a set of squats and pushups every couple of minutes to get even more blood going.

This will get you feeling alert and awake. You can work on delaying your morning brew a bit, and work up to 60 minutes.

Effects

Over the past 8 weeks, I've realised that this is doable. I've also seen some interesting effects that I did not expect.

* My coffee consumption has reduced by about half.

* I don't need my afternoon coffee, as the crash in the latter half of the day does not happen.

* My alertness levels during the first half of the day, which have always been rather high, has increased.

* My resting heart rate has dropped by a few points.

* Falling asleep in the night has become even easier.

Your turn

If you like to experiment, I highly recommend this experiment. It sounds scary, if you are dependent on coffee like I am. But doable.

This is one of those places where learning the inner workings of the body directly contributes to tweaking a routine to make it work better for you.

Use mental models to your advantage.

And that’s it from me for this week’s edition. Thanks for tuning in, and I’ll see you next Sunday!

How’s the weekend panning out so far? If it is not going your way, even something as simple as 30 minutes to yourself or catching up with a friend will set your energy right.

On to the 3 things for today:

* What is the stuff of personal miracles and transformations made of? You already know the answer. You are just searching outside in a frenetic manner when it takes patience and looking inwards.

* The vacation goes well. But once the vacation is over, you find it hard to get back to your old routine. And this hurts you. Don’t let that happen!

* Work anytime and anywhere. The 9-5 is dead. Hooray! And along with it, so are your boundaries.

Before we begin, it’d mean a lot if you can share one of these 3 posts with ONE friend.

The Stuff of Miracles

The gap between what you knowand what you do.That is the real issue.

Find the contradictions in your life.Where you know what to dobut your actions are the polar opposite.Where you are being lazyto apply the basic truth.

Bridge the gap.That's the stuff of miracles.

Get Back to Routine

Everyone slips up.

A friend comes to visit from overseas. Your gym schedule goes for a toss. You drink more than you should. You are eating out more.

That's normal. That's great.

But the crucial part is to get back into your routine immediately after.

The inertia that sets in between is a killer.

Don't let the inertia win.

Work Anytime, Anywhere

Fixed Line

Do you remember 20 years ago, we did not have mobile phones? To reach someone, you called them on a landline. Not everyone had one of those.

There were times when you popped over to your friend's place but they wouldn't be there.

You had to stop and ask for directions to a place you had not been to.

What's a phone?

Technology has changed our lives at a deep level. For the better. For the most part. You can reach anyone at anytime because their phone moves with them. You don't need to interact with a human being if you don't want to - Google Maps will give you reasonable directions.

Sooner or later, the concept of a phone might become redundant. We will be able to communicate with anyone with embedded technology. We will be able to read texts and emails, see maps augmented in our visual fields.

No more 9-5

As technology has become pervasive and with a cataclysmic event (the pandemic), we've seen a paradigm shift in culture. Working from home has become common-place. Working at any time, rather than a fixed 9-5 is a reality.

These sound great and can be. You can be wherever you want and work out of there. You can start your day early and end your day early, and design your schedule as it suits you.

But the dark side of everything needs vigilance. The doom scrolling, the endless notifications, the FOMO - all wreak havoc on our senses. If you are always reachable, you have to answer the phone anytime or respond to texts and emails within a short window.

If you can work from anywhere in the world and if you can work with people anywhere in the world, the concept of a day becomes fuzzier.

Too much of anything is bad for you. Even water.

Always on, always reachable, always accessible has become a curse. That we need articles like these to provide a contrarian view.

No boundaries

If you can work anytime, it leads to working all the time.

You might think it is just five minutes to check email while you are eating dinner.

Or take a call at 11 pm because that's the time that overlaps everyone's timezones the best (except yours.) You tell yourself that the advantage is you can switch off whenever you want, or work from Goa.

But barring the 17 people who seem to be doing this, or at least talking about it on social media, the rest of us are stuck at home. With a worse routine than ever before.

The 9-5 has become more fluid and fuzzy.

The switching off has become "kinda off". You remember we used to switch TVs off before? Now, we put them on standby. We are all on standby.

The context switching, the not switching off, the "I'll take a work call during dinner" or "Answer a couple of emails while chilling with the family". These should send the alarm bells ringing.

Take the power back!

It might not be possible to go back to the 9-5.

But what worked well? Boundaries. Less disturbance. Focus.

What hasn't worked well? Calls at any time. Notifications that gnaw at you. An amorphous routine and day.

As always, the solution is somewhere in the middle. Your middle. Not the absolute middle.

Too much of anything is sucky. Don't think so? Eat chocolate ice-cream (or pizza) for breakfast, lunch, dinner for a week and let me know.

Don't accept societal pressure. See for yourself. Figure out what works for you and what does not.

And that’s it for this week. Thanks for reading!

Only one piece this week. I was travelling and meeting friends during the week and did not want to squeeze in editing and re-drafting posts.

So, let’s get right to it. As always, if you enjoy this or any of my writing, I’d love it if you can spread the word.

Do First. Understand Later.

I am not a religious guy. I know little about it. As soon as I discovered a disinterest in it, I stopped paying attention to it (until recently.) In fact, what put me off religion was that you absofuckinglutely should not ask questions. Instead, shut up and do.

And yet, here I am, many years later recommending a similar approach. Life has a great sense of humour.

Let me explain.

Information and products and services. All are intent on two things. One, your money. Two, quick fixes.

In the world of fitness, nutrition, and health, quick fixes are often the wrong answer. They do work, sometimes. And only when you have a lot of things going right for you. Else, most often, you are doing things that seem amazing when viewed from a 3-month window. But awful when you view it from a 3-year window.

You are stuck in the middle. Surrounded by the best, the first, the most functional, the fastest, the deepest, the squishiest, the whatever - all clamouring for your attention.

What do you do?

The Turkish Getup

In Simple and Sinister, Pavel talks about the benefits of the Turkish Get-up (you go from a lying down position to a standing up position with a load in your hand). Old-school strongmen would teach the TGU to wannabe apprentices, and tell them to go away. And to come back when they could do the movement with a heavy enough load.

Dan John discusses an anecdote where the gallery keeps asking questions to the expert, who refuses to answer them. Why? Because the questions you deem important today are actually irrelevant questions. When you practice and apply, you will work through most of the surface-level questions. And only after will the more pertinent questions arise.

A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that the balances are correct.– Frank Herbert, Dune.

Information Overload

Unfortunately, we live in a scenario where there is a ton of information. Conflicting, confounding information. The era where everyone and their aunt are experts.

So, you are hesitant to dive into something that might be a waste of time. Especially when the right answer is out there, if only you can dig around enough and ask enough questions.

The questions though are seldom the right ones.

How long will it take me to lose 10 kilos?

or

Will I be able to run 5k without losing my breath?

While these are important questions, these are the most obvious and average of outcomes that one gets from a deep commitment to physical fitness. You short sell yourself and your efforts by aiming for these results ONLY and not being open to the experience.

Do first.

Do first.

Research your own experience.Absorb what is useful, reject what is useless, add what is essentially your own.– Bruce Lee

To research your own experience, you need to experience things your way. While the right direction is useful, even getting the direction wrong is going to be part of your learning.

We are so focused on getting things right, because we are averse to "wasting time". But there's no such thing as wasting time. The better your mindset, the more you are going to learn something about you, and what works for you.

By putting in the time, by imagining, by creating your own workarounds, you become an expert. You explore a creative part of you that will remain undiscovered if you keep following the book.

But you must learn to follow the book too. Only if you understand the rulebook will you be able to break/bend the irrelevant rules.

Do first. Understand later.

You learn. You ask better questions. You answer most of the questions yourself.

You explore. You problem solve. You discover.

You learn to frame the problem better.

You become aware of various schools of thought.

You can now distil what to pick from where, and make your own crazy flavour.

All this begins when we give up understanding. The only way to understand few things is by doing. The only way to take a shortcut to the end is to avoid shortcuts.

This skill is something I got right, in the world of fitness and nutrition. It was easy because I was clueless. I mean, I didn't know what carbs were. I thought fitness meant bodybuilding. Knowing my ignorance made me powerful. So, I found something and I did.

And that's a learning I emulate as much as I can. Every time there's a new concept, from Dan John's 10000 swing challenge to learning Indian clubs, I do first. And after putting in enough reps, I pause and reflect.

It is much easier to do in contexts where you are clueless. It is much harder to do in places where you think you know something.

In fitness and nutrition, I use the simple device of harking back to an old memory. That helps me get closer to a blank slate. After which, I experiment on myself. While there are tons of experiences and patterns that I have today, I do not use them immediately. It closes my thinking.

The lesser room one gives for their ego, the easier things are.

Do first. Understand later.

Asking questions is mandatory. But do first. Until you know better questions to ask.

Figure out your own answers. Balance that with getting an expert to answer them as well.

Hope you are having a good time of things. I am excited about what I have in store for you today.

* The Particle and the Wave. We are constantly boxed in. We are constantly divided into extremes. Are you FOR this or are you AGAINST this? And if you are FOR something, there’s the baggage of 75 other things you are apparently okay with. Let’s learn from light, and look at how we need at least 2 complementary (but incomplete) theories to navigate life.

* Is that idea truly your idea? Does it matter? We write things that seem to be our ideas but are influenced by what we've read, and what we've experienced, and are processed in our subconscious in their own way.

* The Hardware and Software of You. My past life as a programmer is never far away from my thinking. How can understanding the two aspects of hardware and software help you express yourself better?

Before we begin, I’d appreciate it if you can spread the word by sharing ONE of these articles with ONE friend of yours. After you read it, of course. It makes a difference.

The Particle and the Wave

High-school Physics

Did you have a fascinating physics teacher in high school? Unfortunately, most of us did not. Many of the fundamental concepts might seem irrelevant to us. For example, how a plane flies or how a train stays on the track around a curve. It only matters to us that the plane flies and the train doesn't derail. Scientists have figured it out and we only consume.

But there is value in understanding the basic fabric of what's around us. It frames our view and our perspective better. It allows us to see metaphors around us. We can see a glimpse of the larger construct around us. We end up copying/emulating in some form or the other.

The double-slit

Light behaves as a particle and a wave.

Why the f**k does that matter and how is it relevant? Hey man, watch your language.

If you'd like to revisit the double-slit experiment you must've done in high school, click here. The basic question - is light a particle i.e. made up of discrete units of light? These show up as dots on the screen. Or is it a wave i.e. continuous?

It seems as though we must use sometimes the one theory and sometimes the other, while at times we may use either. We are faced with a new kind of difficulty. We have two contradictory pictures of reality; separately neither of them fully explains the phenomena of light, but together they do.

– Albert Einstein

Neither is wrong. Neither explains things comprehensively. But together, they do.

The Complication

In many situations, we approach it as black or white (particle.) In reality, they are on a spectrum (wave.)

Are you for or against this issue? Governments seem hell-bent on dividing us into two and creating a left vs right. And because of our skew towards viewing things as particles, we agree with this method. And many times, we pick a side. When in reality, the issue is deeper. The radical middle needs exploration.

Viewing things as a particle, like black/white, is a helpful construct. Especially when things are confusing or overwhelming. But remember, it does not explain things completely. It needs a complementary theory (the spectrum) to help you understand things deeper.

Our skew so far

We've viewed it through the lens of a particle, of black/white for a while now.

Gender. Religion. The football team you support. The type of company you keep. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

In our fascinating times, we are shedding this skew of viewing issues. As only a particle. Instead, we are realising that there's a whole other lens, that of a wave, to look, ponder, and analyse.

The left extreme or right extreme, let's call it the 10%, seems to be the only option. They are loud and clear. But the middle 80% is full of subtlety and this is where most of us are. Via only one tool, we miss out on the beauty of this middle position.

Remember, neither is wrong. Neither explains things fully. But together, they do.

My example

I am an introvert. My past experiences in life affirm this. I have used the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. And verified it with competent coaches to know the theory and my personality are in alignment.

But my primary job for the past decade has been standing in front of 100 people daily. Talking, teaching, learning. And I love it!

It is true that crowds and noise exhaust me but not all crowds and noise. I would've missed out on being a teacher if I had stuck to this rigid view.

At the same time, if I had not understood my skew of being an introvert, I would've been terrible at being a coach.

The extrovert part of the spectrum is always accessible. There are tasks and times when it is necessary to be that person. I look at it as a hat to wear. It is not false but it takes conscious effort to move out of my default position.

The extreme end of the spectrum, that's something I rarely touch. Because it is so far away from me that it does not feel natural.

During my 20s, I viewed this from a black/white framework. I forced myself to do things without understanding myself. Then, I stopped doing everything on "the other side."

Today, I have a better understanding of this spectrum. I am able to express myself better and do cooler things.

Your turn

The world around us wants to divide us. ( Do you see the black/white skew of my statement here :D ) And because we need to be here or there, we pick an extreme. Or worse, we choose inaction. Because deep down, we don’t agree with the extremes. That’s great. But we need to use the complementary theory here to dig deeper into our perspective.

You need to see life both as a particle and a wave.

Where have you been blinded by this? Where are you missing out on living a fuller life because you've been boxed in?

These are important questions for us all to think about.

Next time you find yourself picking an extreme, pause. Look at the spectrum. Look at the middle 80%. Use both theories and take your time.

Is that your idea?

What percentage of thoughts are your own?

What percentage of ideas are truly yours?

We write things that seem to be our ideas but are influenced by what we've read, and what we've experienced, and are processed in our subconscious in their own way.

We generate ideas that are built on gaps or holes as we see them from our lens.

There's nothing wrong with being inspired by someone else's idea. In fact, it happens all the time, whether we acknowledge it or not.

Understanding why the idea feels important to you though is something you can look deeper into, as part of exploring the idea.

What's your favourite movie?

Have you ever wondered why that is your favourite movie? The rabbit hole and profundity of this question were truly fascinating for me.

Two pieces of media you should check out

Two pieces of media that I'd like to share with you.

First, Derek Sivers on the first follower. You can read the short article or see his 3-minute video.

It was the first follower that transformed a lone nut into a leader.

And listen to Oliver Burkeman on the joys of missing out.

By embracing the joy of missing out, you can start to devote your precious time to the things that really matter to you, no matter how long they take.

The Hardware and Software of You

You think getting stronger or faster is only about bigger muscles.

In a car, that makes sense. The car with the bigger engine is going to be more powerful, simplistically speaking.

The process in a human is different. You look at a stronger or faster person, and you see a lot more muscle on them than on you. And make the obvious connection - more muscle = more strength.

That's not wrong.

But the hardware upgrade i.e. building muscle is only part of it. There is a significant software upgrade that happens behind the scenes.

Your brain and your body don't know to communicate well with each other when you start off. You don't know to keep your chest up or your back straight or brace your pillar. That comes with purposeful practice. That comes with quality repetitions.

As the software improves, the outcomes improve.

And then, you will see a spurt in the hardware improvement.

That's why focusing on quality, on your mindset, and ensuring you are focused and concentrated are all key to seeing results from your training.

It is not simply about lifting weights and then going to your phone and wasting time, or chatting with your buddies until it is time to go again. The more switched on you are, the better.

Focus on what you can control. What you control is your focus and concentration and quality of effort.

You don't control your muscle growth or your physique - at least, not directly.

Do the work. And the hardware upgrade will happen. The outcomes will happen.

And that’s it from me. Thanks for spending a few minutes of your day with me. I hope you continue to find it useful.

Weather in Madras, blah blah blah. Weekend, blabbity blah blah.

Let’s get right on with it, shall we?

The three things for this week’s edition are:

* How to find the right direction. Or do we have the courage to stop and ask questions? Or are we going to allow our sunk costs to tell us what to do?

* What we believe is the game-changer versus what the actual game-changer is. A Derek Sivers’ story and an anecdote from Coach Dan John.

* What is the most important thing? Consistency. Showing up. But why?

How to find the right direction

Deep down

We are all searching for something. Deep down, something does not feel quite right. We know what brings us joy. We understand how different we are at our creative selves. But too often, a quick glimpse is all we can afford because there are a zillion things to do, and there's rarely a moment to pause. And when we do pause, it only succeeds in making us feel terrible about ourselves.

Why? Because we know that this is not quite the way things should be.

Wasn't our job meant to be fun? Where would we make a difference, and enjoy doing it?

Weren't we supposed to be somewhere else at this point of time in our lives?

Weren't we supposed to be fit and healthy? With toned bodies and sculpted abs as social media tells us to yearn for?

Baggage

In rare moments of clarity, of space, of silence, we catch a glimmer. We realise that we've mired ourselves in a lot of baggage. We are not where we thought we'd be.

What do we do? Well, we beat ourselves over it. And continue running in the same direction.

We don't recognise that we've changed. whatever our dreams were 10 years back are not what our dreams are today. Our dreams from 10 years before were never our dreams in the first place. But our parents or our friends' were subconsciously thrust on us and we mistook them for our own.

But here we are, on our treadmills to over there, without questioning if that's where we want to get to.

And it is scary to stop and ask questions. Because we've accumulated a lot of baggage for this journey. Our degrees, education, jobs, careers, books, thoughts, and identity - are all crafted with some end goal in mind.

And if that's not where we should be going, oh f**k. Does that mean we have to start all over again?! Since that's scary, we stop that line of questioning.

When I have this, I will be ...

Instead, we make up a different If-Then statement.

We are unhappy with how things are and identify one aspect of our unhappiness. Let me explain.

* Overworked. Most of us are overworked. The amount of work is an endless river and we need to find an extra gear and the work will trickle to a flow that we will be on top of. The harder we work, the more productive we are, and the more there will be to do. A fucked up paradox. But that's how it is.

* Stressed. The stress of being overworked. Of not having enough time to sit still and breathe and take stock. It manifests itself as a lack of sleep, poor energy, feeling fatigued and drained or many such things.

* Not enough "me time". Not enough introspection. All continuing from the above. Swept away.

What we want is

* Clarity. We want to find what we want to be doing, where are we heading, and a clear destination.

* Control. We want to feel in control. Of our lives. Of our days. Of our productivity.

Both of these are illusions. A clear direction is what we need, and not an actual destination. We change, and we will continue to change. As long as we are going in the right direction, as we change, our destination will evolve. Instead, we are focused on a specific destination that we forget that the direction is the key.

And we will never be in complete control. We are not in complete control of our thoughts. We are not in complete control of our direction. We are battling the noise around us to find OUR direction.

But most times, we pick a destination that everyone around us is bleating about. In the physical health realm - a toned body, flat abs, and looking like a Greek statue. Why? Because we are not in control.

We are not in control of our cravings. Of the choices we make. Of the decisions, we fatigue under. So, we believe that bringing the body under our heel, regaining control and getting to the destination of a chiselled body will bring back control.

Again, a destination that many of us fail to reach. Not because we are not capable of it. But because our lives are not designed for it, yet.

The direction is sound. But the destination is not. At least, not yet.

Cut to the chase

Once we get to the destination, we will be able to set right everything. Magically.

How? Take a few minutes to ponder.

You are at the destination. What's different? You snap your fingers, you have the body you want. But nothing else about your life is different.

Your day is still a mess. Your self-compassion is non-existent. You are running in the wrong direction.

But you believe that being in this place will allow you what exactly? You are confusing enlightenment, whatever the heck that means, with losing weight.

Journey over destination

The journey is the point. Even with a wrong destination as a toned body (because it is tinged with the end of the rainbow feelings), going along that path will allow us to change. It did for me.

But if we do not re-compute the destination at some point as we get wiser, we will forever be unhappy.

If we start with the wrong destination and do not correct it as we learn along the way, we will end up being in the wrong place AND the same place.

It is important to take stock, to introspect. What is at the end of the rainbow? And is it true that this is available to us only over there? And is it available to us only via one path? Is there another path? Is there a direct path?

Only you know.

We need to stop and ask questions about ourselves. And answer these questions.

We need the courage to let go of baggage, and be ready to begin again if needed.

You cannot expect someone else to do the job for you. Guide - certainly. Teach - possibly. But do - nope, that's all you.

Once you ask the question, you are in the right direction.

Less is More

About 2 years ago, I finally got back to writing regularly. Writing has made a huge difference in my life. It has helped me to think a bit more about half-baked notions and make them cohesive. It has helped me battle overthinking. It has helped me be consistent.

For the first few weeks, it was daily. And then, it became 3 days a week.

I am now leaning towards writing longer, better (researched) articles fewer times than using it as a dumping ground. Or maybe there's room for both.

It makes me uncomfortable, as it means more structure, more editing, and more work. And that's probably why it is the path to take.

Two anecdotes

Read this article by Derek Sivers, where he talks about the crucial moment when he got rich. In case you get lazy and don't read it, here's an excerpt. But this will make a lot more sense if you read it.

Once I had $12,000 I could quit my job and become a full-time musician. I knew I could get a few gigs per month to pay my cost of living. So I was free. I quit my job a month later, and never had a job again.When I finished telling my friend this story, he asked for more. I said no, that was it. He said, “No, what about when you sold your company?”I said no, that didn’t make a big difference in my life.

And then, there's this wonderful anecdote from Coach Dan John's freely available book, A Contrarian Approach to the Discus Throw.

Back in 1985, Olympic Medalist and World Champion Bill Koch came to Salt Lake City. A local ski rental store provided a work shop for the public. I was certainly the only “strength” athlete there, but I found Koch’s discussion riveting. Why? Nobody there, save me, could listen to what he was saying. What? Oh, they could hear him, but they couldn’t listen to him.I was with a student of mine who later skied for the University of Utah. He kept asking the same questions of Koch: “How many hours do you train? What periodization do you use?”Koch, an Olympic medalist and World Champ, kept answering: “I take my girls three times a week to the bunny hill at the resort…I race them to the top of the lift while they take the chairs, then we ski down as a family. I do this over and over again. It gives me the “biggest bang for the buck.””What the other skiers wanted to hear was…well, something else.

In both these anecdotes, the outsiders do not get the import of what the protagonist is saying. Because it does not match the climactic moment. Or it does not match the pattern they are looking for. The answer that they think that they've been missing.

The Most Important Thing

Find something fun to do. Have fun doing it. Laugh, frolic, play. It becomes something you look forward to.

Keep showing up. When it rains. When it shines. When you are feeling low. When you are buzzing with energy. Just keep showing up.

Find the right direction. You might make mistakes finding that direction, but that's okay. All your mistakes are ways to strike out the various wrong directions. Ultimately, you will end up facing the right way.

Keep walking in that direction. Keep showing up. Did I already say that? Well, it is that important. It does not matter if you are fast or slow. It matters that you are going in the right direction.

Don't forget the power of compounding. Warren Buffet made 95% of his wealth in the last 15 or so years.

Your results, your habits, your health, your fitness, your confidence - all of it will compound. As long as you keep walking in the right direction.

It is fine if you stop. It is fine if you stumble. In fact, I insist that you stumble multiple times.

What matters is to pick yourself up and keep walking.

Keep showing up.

That's the most important thing.

That’s it for this week. See you, folks, next week!

If you have any thoughts or feedback, I’d love to hear it.

Weekends are for unwinding, and not for sucky work stuff. Take care of yourself and you’ll have a much better week.

On to the 3 things in this week’s edition:

* A wake-up call to not ignore. A gut feeling that I did not quite know how to follow or investigate, as I was busy being busy. And how a crisis allowed me to look up and view things differently. Maybe you will see a new perspective too.

* Little things matter. More than we realise.

* You never know what the other person is going through. This post resonated a lot with people, and I’d love it if you spent a few minutes on this, and shared it with a few people too.

A wake-up call to not ignore

Simpler times

In my mid-20s, while I was in grad school and my first job after, the pace of life was rather different. It feels incredulous but I had oodles of time. Of course, it helps my universe was rather small. But small or not, your Universe is all that matters to you.

I realise it is not only the time but the energy and the space. There was one activity that I did at a time. If I am in class, then leading up to class was all about prepping for the 2 or so hours. Post-class, we'd head out to the bar and get some food and drinks. Conversations would be wide-ranging. Building on what we had discussed to more mundane and juvenile stuff. But at no point were we rushed.

Even in my job at a start-up in the Valley, this pace and "one deep activity at a time" was the norm. If I was working on a difficult problem, that was all there was. I might step away from my room, grab a beer and chill with my room-mates but one beer later, I'd be back at it. If we fired up the grill, the evening was about cornhole and grilling and beer and chilling.

When I'd head to play Ultimate, it was always for a few hours. It was not a cramped one hour of rec league, but the drills before that an experienced player would teach and head to the Lion after.

Moving to India

My entire life changed when I moved to India to start a fitness company. Being half the workforce and a new business owner, my partner and I did everything. Since we were figuring out the entire thing, our day was not under control.

Fast-forward a decade, and as the organisation grew, our roles and responsibilities grew with it. And in 2019 (before the pandemic), my day was unrecognisable from what it was a decade earlier. Dubbing these as good problems made me hide. But my gut knew this was not the way forward.

Unfortunately, I did not know how to get out of the tidal wave that was sweeping me away.

I knew something had to change. I thought I was being a silly romantic when I looked back at my creative, productive self from my mid-20s. I figured that was not an option anymore because, well, one grows up.

A wake-up call

Then, the pandemic happened.

It brought with it a lot of scary and terrible things to the world. I am not going to discuss any of that.

It was a wake-up call because it yanked me out of the normal way of life. The tidal wave. The powerful current of modern life and entrepreneurship was sweeping me away.

Going over my journals, I realised that a lot of my wishful scenarios were back. It no longer felt like a struggle to stay afloat. Coming up for air was happening with more frequency.

A new normal

But 2 years on, we are at a new normal.

It has all the crappiness of the old normal, with some extra crappiness thrown in.

You can "work from home" but you are now working across more timezones than before. You are now working around dinner, around your time with family and squeezing work in wherever possible. You don't have to drive to meetings anymore but you have more meetings. And you need to figure out when to do your actual work, as your meetings own your day.

You are context-switching - emails and projects and prepping lunch and dropping the kids and picking them up and telling the cook what to do and it is all a giant f*****g mess. But hey, welcome to the new normal.

Your kids can ask their teachers a doubt at any time. Your employees can reach you anytime. You can reach your boss and get your issues sorted. Any time.

Aw-f*****g-ful!

A new perspective

I might sound like an alarmist. Or a conspiracy theorist.

But the brief wake-up call has given me a different lens to look at things.

I still get sucked in. I am not under full control of my day, my time, or my energy.

But I know that it is imperative to not buy into this hustle b******t. This "constantly connected" nonsense.

Working hard, being immersed deeply in your work, doing what you are here to do, living a fulfilling life - yes!

Not being in control of your time, being swept in the tidal wave, bandying busyness as a badge, overstressed, overworked, sleeping less, not having time for friends or family or yourself or your health or your fitness - absolutely not!

The right answer

I don't quite know the right answer. But I recognise the wrong answer. And figuring out "not that" seems to be a good starting point.

I also have the advantage of knowing a handful of successful people whose day and perspectives I'd like to emulate. The right answer, to me, is around us. The people who've rejected the rat race and the hustle culture. People who are not wallowing in busyness. The people who are embracing slow work. People who * gasp * don't multi-task.

I think we are all being pulled down a bad path. It is on each of us to reject it and fight the current. Swimming upstream is awfully hard. Or get out of this river and find another one.

It sounds hard. It sounds impossible. But it also feels right.

You can sleep when you are dead. But are you alive today?

Stop to think for yourself. Do not assume this is how it has to be. You have to be in control.

To me, it feels similar to seeing glimpses of The Matrix. Once seen, it is impossible to un-see. I don't have tips or techniques or tactics. But I know what I need to do - get off this fast train going in the opposite direction of where I want to go. And pick a train going in the right direction.

As big a crisis as the pandemic was (and is), it is also an opportunity. Don't let a slap in the face go to waste.

Never let a crisis go to waste.— Rahm Emmanuel

Little things matter

A high-five. A fist-bump. A piece of candy. A "well done!"

You never know what the other person is going through. You never know how much work they are putting in.

Give them a fist bump. That person who is next to you. That person working by themselves in the corner. You've seen them but neither of you has ever said a word to each other. But that's okay. But give them a fist bump next time you see them showing up!

And you know what, you get one in return. It feels good. Do it!

The little things matter a lot.

Links from the Internet

Check out Tim's oldie but goldie - 9 habits to stop doing.

We are all familiar with 30-day challenges. Here's a rather different one from Neil Strauss.

You never know what they are going through

The mantra at The Quad is "Show up!"

Our students know this to be true. They show up, and the community, the programming, the coaches, the environment, the energy - it will carry them.

When you have the energy, you contribute to carrying others, whether you know it or not. And when you are feeling down, the class carries you.

That's why I love large group classes and am immensely proud of the atmosphere you can get in a Quad class.

You never know what the person next to you is going through.

You never know if the student in front of you who is struggling to do goblet squats today (when they normally lift 3 times that) just heard terrible news the previous night. But they showed up because showing up helps.

You never know if the person in front of you spent all week at the hospital, taking care of their ailing parent. But they showed up. Because this is their "me" time. This is where they can switch off for a brief hour.

What I've learned over the past 10 years works well as a good rule for life. Be supportive, and let them guide you. Forcing heavy weights unequivocally is a terrible idea. And some days, you have to save them from themselves and make them go light.

Their job is to show up. My job is to take care of them.

Because you never know what they are going through.

Thanks for reading. I’ll see you here next week!

The 3 things for you today are:

* Swimming upstream. Salmon swim upstream to spawn. You need to swim upstream to keep your health and fitness and sanity.

* Relaxed concentration. While finding Flow is hard, there are other similar methods to start at.

* Have difficulty falling asleep? You hit the bed but the zzz’s just won’t come? Well, this is the post for you.

Before we begin, I would appreciate you spreading the word about my blog to ONE friend. While I love writing for the five of you, I’d like to reach a larger audience. It will enable me to write better and create a larger impact.

And if you don’t think I am share-worthy, I would LOVE to know what you think I need to do to get there. Really. Seriously. Just respond to this email with your thoughts.

Swimming Upstream

Everyone is selling you something

What are you looking for? In your health and fitness journey, you are under constant threat. Corporations with a lot of money and power control what you see on TV and in the movies, with their blatant advertisements and subtle ones. They flood your physical surroundings with their products as well.

You start thinking "the other side" is the nice guys. The gyms and the supplement companies and then whoever else. Because they provide you with relief and hope.

Everyone is selling you something. Including me.

You have to buy something. But the choice of what you buy into is still yours. For that, you need to understand why you are buying into it.

Unfortunately, you do need to buy

You have to take care of your health and fitness. There is no way around it. You allow the river to take you downstream, it will not end in a good place.

The truth is all around you.

* We are all more unhealthy than we've ever been.

* The incidence of lifestyle diseases is ridiculous.

* The lack of movement freedom in an adult human is alarming.

* Even the kids are unhealthy. But of course, they are. Their idea of normal is even more skewed than ours.

And everyone is looking to make money off of you.

You need to start swimming against the current. You need to arm yourself for that swim by curating the barrage of information and snake oil around you.

They are interested in themselves

But you are the golden egg-laying goose.

If you are "cured", then you won't continue laying golden eggs.

That's the harsh reality of it. This is why there are no permanent cures but temporary relief.

* You need to keep coming to the gym. Or else!

* You need to buy supplements every month.

* You need to buy the latest wearable because it will be the answer to what you are looking for.

* You need 17 different wearables so that you can track every blip of every sneeze.

Or, to put it bluntly, you need to keep opening up your wallet with alarming regularity.

Do your own thinking

Unfortunately, you are swamped. You want to outsource your thinking here. And of course, there are legitimate resources to outsource your fitness to * hint hint *.

But you have to be aware of what's going on. You cannot put your hand up and leave it to someone else.

My philosophy is to guide and educate you. In a year or five, you will

* learn to fall in love with movement

* learn the fundamental skills of strength training

* learn to call b******t

* build a foundation of fitness

* integrate fitness and movement into your life

But to do all this, you need to be an active participant. You need to know if absolute strength and deadlifting 3 times your body weight is necessary, or unnecessary for you. There’s no right or wrong here. Does that add value? Or are you aimlessly picking some action to do?

You need to be able to explore and add new facets to your movement - playing badminton, running a 10k - and whatever else strikes your fancy. You need to know what the price for an activity is - strength work demands stretching. Modern life demands mobility and movement.

You need to be part of this conversation of making all of these work for you and fit into the larger fabric of your life.

Overwhelming. But rewarding.

I understand this sounds overwhelming.

But if I can become an expert in kettlebell training, strength training, in health and fitness, I know anyone can. I cannot time-travel and show my college self to you but suffice to say I was completely inadequate in my health, in my fitness. Both knowledge and behaviour were completely lacking.

Finding the right direction, getting on the right part of the map, and plodding along and discovering is all I've done.

Ultimately, it is simple. And rewarding.

I know, it still sounds daunting. Maybe you sucked at biology (no, you didn't. Your teacher did.) or physics>mechanics instigated nightmares (again, your teacher sucked.)

You have figured out complex situations and subjects. You are probably thinking "Yet another?!?" but think about this. Your body is amongst your most important possessions. Even if you pay top dollar to the best coach in the world, it is still important enough for you to learn and understand.

Become independent. Once you get there, the rewards of an interdependent relationship with a coach become even better. Because it HAS to be a two-way conversation.

My mentors in strength, philosophy, and life - Dan John and Pavel - have written everything that I will ever need to know. The great thing is that they continue writing their ideas to keep explaining the same stuff in different ways. Without my current level of understanding and involvement and commitment, none of what they say will strike home.

The point of all this is not a fitter body or a sharper mind.

It is (yet another) expression of you and your values.

Relaxed Concentration

Finding Flow, or being in the zone is a heady feeling. Not while it is actually happening but later, when you reflect on it. Was that really you? And how do you do that again?!?

When your instructive, authoritarian self takes a backseat. Instead, you are somehow intrinsically connected with the activity.

But it is often elusive.

What I have learned to do in my physical training is to arrive at a state of relaxed concentration. Not 100% of the time. Not even close. But in this place of relaxed concentration, the instructive self does quiet down and instead, there seems to be a much deeper connection with the body.

Stretching and Original Strength resets are when I arrive at this mental state often. With kettlebell work, I am often too amped.

Like everything, I think this is a skill that I can continue to work on.

You hit the bed but have trouble falling asleep?

Question

Are you sleeping (at least) for 7 hours?

Are you feeling well-rested and energised?

An increasing number of people report the negative to both questions. Sleep has become elusive to many of us before we even get into its quality. There are umpteen factors, from our work-life balance to our stress, to our evening routines, to our time management and what-not. One factor that plays a huge role is environment design.  

Cleaning out your pantry is environment design. You are making it harder to slip up in your kitchen by ensuring there is no junk food around. Designing the environment and your behaviour in the bedroom will lead to an improved standard of sleep.

Now, let's get some basics out of the way.

* Sleep is important.

* Everyone needs 7-9 hours of sleep.

* The probability of you needing only 6 hours of sleep and thriving is lower than the probability of a lightning strike on your head.

If you want to deep dive into sleep, look up Matthew Walker.

But ....

And yet, you are not sleeping enough. Quality or quantity or both are insufficient. You "catch up" on sleep over the weekends. You wake up groggy and bleary-eyed when the alarm goes.

You take too long to fall asleep. You get anxious about falling asleep. You have difficulty staying asleep. If you wake up in the middle of the night, it is near impossible to go back to sleep.

Sheesh!

If you are unable to fall asleep immediately, this is for you. And yes, falling asleep immediately is a skill you can learn and cultivate. And yes, it is important.

Let's start small

To change the outcome, you need to change your behaviour. Instead of giving you 10 tips or whatever, I am going to have you focus on one.

Go to bed ONLY when you need to sleep.

Why? When you lie down in bed and engage in other activities - doom scrolling on your phone, answering your emails, talking on the phone, watching YouTube on your laptop, eating your meals (WTF!) etc - you are confusing things.

Let's take a detour and learn about Pavlovian conditioning. You know the story. This brilliant Russian scientist associated a neutral stimulus (ringing a bell) with a positive stimulus (getting food.) He'd ring a bell and then feed the dog. After conditioning the dog with this stimuli, the dog would respond to the bell as if it had gotten the food i.e. it would start salivating.

Bell = food.

Likewise, what you need to condition your mind and body is simple. Bed = sleep.

When you end up doing a plethora of activities, you are reducing this association. Today, a significant problem is lying down in bed and being unable to sleep. Coz of this!

Without even going into blue light and electronics and all that jazz, you are setting yourself up for failure.

What do you do?

Bell = Food.

Bed = Sleep.

Use the power of classical conditioning aka Pavlovian conditioning to your benefit. Dissociate the other activities from your bed. Do all your time-wasting and doom scrolling elsewhere. Bed = sleep.

And once you are in bed, you can use my simple breathing drill to help you sleep.

Stay consistent. Do quality reps.

Your sleep woes will reduce by a significant factor. While there are many things you can work on to improve sleep, I hope this gave you a clear, simple reason and path forward to work on one aspect.

Sleep is important. More important than the importance you are giving it today.

That’s it for today. Thank you for spending a valuable few minutes of your Sunday with me. I truly appreciate it.

The 3 things for today are:

* on Streaks and Cycles.

* the Law of Intertia.

* Training indoors vs outdoors, air conditioner or not, and such questions.

on Streaks and Cycles

Skip sugar for a month.

Walk 30 minutes every day for 30 days.

Be vegetarian for a year.

All of these are streaks. You are attempting to do something every day for an uncomfortably long duration. Streaks are good for you. They teach you patience, resilience, and consistency. They help you break out of dysfunctional patterns that are detrimental to you.

If you are in the habit of hankering for something sugary daily, then going 30 days without sugar is a great learning experience. And a freeing one as well. If you have been busy with life and want to start being active, resolving to walk daily for a month is a brilliant goal.

Powerful

Streaks are a powerful tool in your toolbox. When you are starting off something new or needing a jolt or a slap, you do a streak. While you might not nail a new habit, you will recognise a lot of your in-built patterns. You will realise that you can keep your cravings under control, you will realise you can say 'no', and that you are the boss of you after all.

80% of the benefits of elimination diets happen in the first 4 weeks. So, that's definitely a good target to aim for. Beyond that, it is useful to challenge yourself but your sanity is more important than a number that no one cares about. But you be you! If you have a clear reason, aim for a longer streak.

The learnings will compound.

Unsustainable

The problem is streaks are not sustainable. It is not their job to be sustainable. Their job is to shake you up, to get you out of your rut, to get you way past your comfort zone and then some.

Enter cycles. Instead of skipping sugar for a month, you stay on the straight and narrow during the weekdays and you have your sugary fix over the weekend. Call that the old 5-2 i.e. 5 days of no sugar followed by 2 days of no rules. This becomes rather sustainable, as you have a release point every weekend.

Nope, not the cycle I am talking about.

You can and should find your own cycle. Some people do better on the 6-1 i.e. having sugar only on a Sunday. Or maybe you wanna have sugar on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Everything goes.

When?

If you are allergic to something or doing an intense form of restricted eating, going for a streak, especially the first time you want to try something out is a good idea. If it works, you make it a sustainable part of your life via cycles.

Or of course, you are starting off with this fitness habit - time to shelve all the excuses and aim for a streak.

Remember, streaks are you going into overdrive. But it would be best if you learned to shift into sustainability or risk losing your sanity.

Streaks are useful when:

* you had way too much fun during a vacation. And want to get back on track, and then some.

* you need to get rid of a crutch.

* you need a jolt out of your current patterns.

* you wanna jump into the deep end.

Streaks AND Cycles

The point is not one or the other. It is not either-or. It is AND.

They are two tools in your toolbox, and you should use both.

You do streaks when the situation mandates it. You do cycles the rest of the year.

Cycles need not align with each other. That is, your sugar cycle might be a 5-2, while your activity cycle might be a 1-1 (work-rest-work-rest ...). And you can do both of them at the same time. Cycles allow you to figure out all aspects of your routine and slot them in as you need them.

Based on the outcomes, how hard the effort is, and how sustainable it is, you tweak your cycles.

It is never either or. Both are useful. Both are mandatory. Use wisely.

Fighting Inertia

You aren’t going to the gym coz you are lazy.

You aren’t eating your veggies coz you are lazy.

Being lazy simply means fighting inertia. Let's revisit Newton's First Law:

A body remains at rest, or in motion at a constant speed in a straight line, unless acted upon by a force.

It is not really laziness but when something is not yet our habit, going against the current is hard. And we give up and do something else that's easier. Which is to continue going down the path of least resistance.

Let's ask a similar question but from another angle.

What are you doing in your life, coz you are lazy?

I stayed at my old job because I was lazy. I didn't write this blog for many years because I was lazy.

To get out of your comfort zone, to beat inertia - that's the key.

Ask yourself these two questions, and think about the answers you come up with.

Should you work out indoors or outdoors?

The first two years of the transformation of my fitness are characterised by two aspects - community and the outdoors. Running with Team ASHA in gorgeous trails was my introduction to running. Coming from the confines and crowds of Madras, the parks and trails were alien and helped me reconnect with the outdoors.

A large group of people and the outdoors have been a feature of my childhood as well. Played with a dozen friends in my colony, or in school, all outdoors.

The joy of a large group, community, and being outside the confines of a room were all factors that went into designing The Quad experience. It's not for everyone but for those of us who enjoy getting out, who will take the pebble along with the smooth path, the grime and grind. For those with similar experiences from when they were younger, and/or those who want to create such experiences today.

A chat with Coach Rip

Right before Raj and I moved, we worked with Coach Mark Rippetoe, on his legendary certification, Starting Strength. One of the questions I posed him was about outdoor training - I mentioned the weather and the sweat and the humidity. He heard me out and said, "You'll get used to it." and moved on. It was not a dismissal but a simple statement of fact.

This has stayed with me since then.

Building resilience

It is easy to get used to comfort. It is hard to switch out of things, and even be in temporary discomfort. Being without an A/C in peak Madras summer, for example, is enough to create nightmares. But then, this was the norm for (at least) the first 15 years of my life. The norm for a significant portion of the population today.

What happens is once you get used to it, gets hard to go back. It softens you. It does. As the Stoics recommend, it is useful to practice removing these comforts periodically, just to keep your calluses intact.

So, whenever the opportunity allows it, I do practice it. None of these is recommendations or suggestions. Just anecdotes.

* On a hike that my wife and I were on, she was having trouble with her shoes. I love being barefoot and exploring activities that I can do barefoot but even I need signs from the universe. And this was one. Took my shoes off and gave it to her, and I did the 10k hike barefoot. No thorns or brambles but stones and rocky trails. It remains one of my favourite hikes to date.

* One habit I've caught myself with is sipping on water during my training sessions. From utilising it to waste time, and to catch my breath, I realised I did not actually need water. After ensuring that I focused on hydration during the entire week, I started testing not drinking water during my training sessions. Except on horrendously muggy days, or long-duration activities, I don't sip on water in the midst of my sessions anymore. Kettlebell work, for example, which is always a compact 30-45 minutes, I have not needed water in a few years.

* Training without an A/C is standard practice for me. My previous home gym didn't have an A/C and that made it a simple decision. Keeping my hands dry, and increasing the safety protocols I followed became second nature and have improved how I train.

These are 3 simple places where I've worked on removing my old habits and patterns and challenging the ways of doing something. There is no point to them except the act of doing. The fact that it checks off quite a few boxes - resilience, removing crutches, practising for situations etc is a welcome bonus.

Not a flex

Training outdoors vs indoors is not a flex. A/C or not is not a flex. You do what suits you. You do what is comfortable, and convenient, and reduce the hurdles in you getting your activity.

Practical tips

If you are used to training indoors:

* It can take a bit of time to get used to training outdoors. Especially in the summer but aspects like humidity and sun play a huge role as well.

* Definitely use your air conditioner when things heat up more.

* Do ensure you work out without the A/C as well periodically. If the A/C is mandatory, then that's a crutch and it is not mandatory. Just a "nice to have."

If you are new to training:

* You will get used to outdoor work in a short period of time.

* You've been indoors a bit too much, coz of the nature of your work and society. So, it will feel a bit difficult, to begin with.

Safety is the primary factor:

* Regardless of where you are training, focus on safety.

* If you are using equipment that could slip, ensure you wipe the sweat off your palms and chalk up.

* Ensure that your floor is not slippery but allows an anti-skid grip.

* Stay hydrated, and this is not only during the activity but starts well before and continues well after the activity is done.

* Unless impossible, stay out of direct sunlight for long durations. If you are playing a sport, for example, this is impossible. But otherwise, don't overdo the sun exposure. Ease into it.

* Do not lift weights looking into the sun. Just don't!

* Don’t be stupid.

Potential activities include:

* Walking, running and cycling are what come to mind first, for most of us. There is a HUGE difference between running on a treadmill versus running in the outdoors, even if it is on the road in a city. My personal belief is that the joy of running has a lot to do with the freedom of running outdoors. Barring safety and logistics, do these outdoors.

* Sports. With the turf fields and badminton courts that are burgeoning around the cities, people are reconnecting to what was once common. Playing outdoors.

Which is better?

The one you can do.

It is not about better.

If you are living away from the city and in the midst of nature, it is a no-brainer. You are going to be outdoors.

If you are in the concrete jungle, then going outdoors is a welcome break from the confines of your daily life. This is what I believe in, and that’s a huge factor in why our gyms are outdoors and we steadfastly refuse to put our community inside an enclosed space. We have scant opportunities to go outside, and The Quad Experience is designed to keep you outdoors, in large groups, but with safety in mind.

But remember, you do what is sustainable and long-term for you.

That’s it for this week. Thank you for spending part of your weekend with me. I’ll see you next week.

What ruckus are you creating today? What’s different this weekend from the previous weekend?

And most importantly, what’s keeping you up at night?

On to the 3 things for this week.

* How to avoid getting sugar cravings in the first place. When cravings come, it depends on our state of mind - to resist or not. But what if you could avoid it even happening? It is a chemical signal, after all.

* Best Friends. Are you one?

* Learn from yourself. You’ve learned a lot. You are smarter than you think. But have you taken the time to mine your own learnings? Start now.

How to avoid getting sugar cravings

You have cravings. I have cravings. We all have cravings.

For most of you, it is wanting to pop in something sweet and sugary. Some folks have a craving for savoury stuff. But they are cravings.

There's nothing harmful about cravings.

But, when you miss a meal, are sleep deprived, or had a stressful day at work, or had an argument with a friend, you find yourself elbow deep in double chocolate ice cream. It happens in a blur. The autopilot kicked in and there was no room for rational thought or slow thinking.

That's definitely a problem.

After a solid meal

Another scenario that crops up is the craving to have something sugary after a good meal. You just ate. You are rather full. You ate well.

But still, there's this sugar craving. Why?!?!

Some of you are pros at this. You pop in a square of dark chocolate and you are good to go. Some of you cannot stop at one square, and it is a slippery slope.

That's definitely a problem.

I've written earlier about how to tackle sugar cravings. Here you go:

* 7 strategies to help you beat the cravings.

* Controlling your craving.

* About my personal battles with the sugar fiend in me.

* And a weird thought on reframing the craving itself.

But in this post, I want to introduce a weird and alien concept. If you check all boxes (will get to it) you actually won’t get any sugar cravings.

Here's a relevant clip from The Matrix for you to watch.

The mental model I want you to have is this:

* There are a hundred switches in your gut.

* In your meals, when you eat highly nutritious and fibrous stuff, these vitamins and minerals and amino acids and fatty acids and whatnots start closing these switches.

* When your meals lack some of these whatnots, and when your meals repeatedly lack them - some of these switches are not turned off.

* Your gut recognises that there's something missing, and that comes across as a craving.

* In you pop that sugary goodness, and the craving goes away.

But funnily enough, what's actually missing is something else - one of the aforementioned whatnots.

When you switch to eating real food and regularly are eating that way, your cravings go down. And there will be many meals when you do not get any cravings.

Isn't that a superpower?

You eat sugary goodness when you want, coz you feel like it. Not because of an uncontrollable urge to do so.

More power to you!

Best Friends

I know, I know. Back in high school and saying "best friends."

But why is it so hard to be your best friend? Why is it easier and habitual to be a dick instead?

You look at it on paper, it makes no sense. You want to be your best friend. You understand you better than most. You know all the great things you are doing. But yet, you behave like anything close to a friend.

By you, I mean me. If I could encapsulate all of the self-improvement work I am doing, it comes to this - be my best friend.

You already know everything that you need to know

But you keep digging around more. You are reading more self-help and self-improvement books. You follow smart, successful people whom you want to emulate.

But have you learned something fundamental about yourself? Something that you could not have come up with yourself? Burning the metaphorical midnight oil? I doubt it. How? I've been there. And I am still there quite often.

Extra hour

The pandemic enforced extra time on us all. No commute or social obligations lead to an extra hour or two in the day. I've already been down the Netflix and PlayStation path in my youth. So, I decided to focus on reading and writing.

As I looked around for recommendations, I focused on the overlaps between different schools of thought. The standout one to me was journaling.

Already knew that

Of course, I already knew that you should journal. Coach Dan John is meticulous about his training journals and has piles and piles of them going back decades. But I failed every time I attempted it.

If I couldn't maintain a training journal, could I maintain a journal for my day and for my life? Wrong question.

Am I okay with not starting a journal? Definitely not!

Analysis paralysis

There are 100s of options for daily journaling. From 5-minute journals to writing prompts, to open journaling. It is easy to get sucked in. At least, for me.

I gave myself a deadline of 24 hours to find something, or else. That empowered me to start.

No prompts, no nothing. Jot down everything. Over the last 2 years, I've refined my writing prompts for my journal.

Reflect

Journaling has become an integral part of my morning routine. While I do not do it daily, I average a bit under 6 times a week.

The writing is only one part though. It is the periodic reflection that makes things compound.

I do weekly, monthly, and quarterly reviews. Or rather, I used to. Over the past few months, with the world reopened, I've stumbled.

But since this has already happened to me - I know it because I've written it in my journal - I know what I need to do. Which is to get back to weekly, monthly, and quarterly reviews.

Takeaway

Journaling is a valuable tool.

Spend 15 minutes daily, either at the start of your day or the end of your day, writing things down.

Review them every Sunday.

Make rules and guidelines for yourself, based on your journal entries.

For every other question that pops up in your head, figure out your own answer. It is better that way.

And this is to get you to start. Once you start forging your own path, you will come up with your own system.

It is vital to read books and interact with people more intelligent than you. They are able to say things that are in your mind in an erudite and succinct fashion. But as you apply it in your context, your journal will tell you how to be you.

Copy with aggression, and build on your own learnings.

And as with all bits of advice, take what makes sense to you and ignore the rest.

And that’s it for this week. Thanks for reading!

Back this week with 3 pieces for you.

* Finding balance. Balance is elusive. There are long-term aspects and immediate aspects to be looked at. Signals are delayed. And yet, balance is important. What can we learn from how ecological balance works?

* How do some people make things look easy? Is it just easy for them? Are they lucky?

* On miracle diets and fixes, yet again. Coz it is always a question.

Let’s get to it.

Finding Balance and Pillaging the Earth

Earth 1.0

One of the chapters in Following Fish follows the story of the hilsa. Samanth's search for the best hilsa leads him to various eateries. Everyone has an opinion of the best hilsa, where to find it, how to cook it, etc. A section I found particularly interesting was the handed-down instruction of not fishing for the hilsa during the winter. Today's fishermen are of the opinion that the elders were lazy/idiots and that there is hilsa to in the winter.

Duh! Of course, it is there, you nitwit, until there's no hilsa in any season.

The human race, in its infancy, lived in ecological balance. The right balance between prey and predators. The right amount of fishing and layoff to allow the rejuvenation of the environment. The interplay between the Grizzly and the salmon, and how the Grizzly eats the salmon is vital for the continued ecological balance. There are thousands and thousands of beautiful balances at micro and macro levels.

Today, we are in a race to f**k up the Earth. And the plan is to get the f**k outta here before it becomes untenable.

How depressing and deplorable is that?

The human race seems to think it is the focal point of the story. The idea is to ensure that it survives. No one (country) seems to want to go first and take a stance - zero pollution, zero plastics, zero oil or zero whatever. Why? Coz someone else will overtake it. Classic game theory and well, the human condition playing out.

Earth 2.0

The solution touted is that we will zoom off into the stars and continue our story elsewhere. First up, does a civilisation that cannot take care of its home and other inhabitants deserve that kinda status? But that's also throwing the baby out with the bathwater - the human race has done some awesome s**t.

The better solution might be to figure out the ecological balance on a planetary scale and get there. Let there be forests and lions and tigers. Let there not be humans everywhere. Let there be enough water for everyone and food. To get there, we need to think on a planetary scale, one would assume.

Since we cannot even stop wars from happening yet, the odds of an organisation/coalition forming and doing that are zero. If you haven't seen Don't Look Up, do check it out.

AlphaZero and AI

Watching and reading about AlphaZero and DeepMind let's one get carried away with the potential of a new overlord.

AlphaZero is an AI program that has learned to play chess at a level not seen before. Not only has it proven unbeatable by any human, but it has also beaten top chess programs. It is also playing chess in new ways, not conceived by human grandmasters.

The amazing thing is AlphaZero taught itself chess. Given the rules, it played against itself and figured the game out in a few hours. Of course, chess is 64 squares and limited pieces, and the universe of possibilities is mapped.

But, what if, we write smart AI programs which will write smart AI programs to govern the Earth. In my head, scenarios closer to that path seem to be the only possibility of Earth 1.0 recovering itself and not ending up in Wall-E like scenarios.

Making sense of my tangential thinking

Earlier in the week, I was speaking with 25-35 year-olds about why fitness needs to be fun and sustainable. The reason is simple - you have to do it for the long-term and the only way to do that is by looking forward to it.

One needs to be in balance. One needs to have good short-term effects, as well as learn to put aside instant gratification for the longer term. You need to do what you need to do, regardless of what your friends or family want to do. At the same time, you cannot be a recluse and reject society. Well, I guess you can if that's your balance point.

When you focus only on one aspect or metric, you lose sight of the whole picture. In the past 100-ish years, from the Industrial Revolution, the human race has been caught up in its own b******t and pillaging the planet and going forward. Is forward at any cost moving forward at all?

Likewise, is working unreasonable hours with stupid stress the right thing to do? Putting aside your instant gratification for a better tomorrow. Or to live as if today's the last and to heck with tomorrow.

Balance. Whatever that means.

It means everything.

Making it look easy

You know how some people make things look so easy. They seem to have all the time in the world to socialise and party. They seem to have ample time to watch TV and the latest shows. And they are on point with their work as well.

Nothing is easy.

They work on it.

They work on it primarily with two methods. One, the things they are not doing is everything else. They are not wasting their time on things they do not want to do, nor are they trying to do everything. It just looks that way to us. Two, they work on it! Actively.

To us, we see only the end product and it looks pretty easy.

It is not impossible, of course. It is not easy.

Why that person’s miracle diet didn’t work for you

You hear this all the time. Especially today, coz apparently this is news. See how this person miraculously lost weight. It immediately makes you wanna drop everything you are doing and do that thing. Coz what you are doing is too hard or not working or not working fast enough or coz you have the attention span of a Golden Retriever in a squirrel park.

You are looking for something. You want social proof. The objective thinker, the "Show me the facts" person in you might not fall for it. But we all have moments of weakness and send that fellow away to the back room.

Well, it doesn't work. Of course, it doesn't.

Or worse yet, it works. And you think that was the right thing to do.

It could simply be that your dedication and consistency helped. Going from eating 3 candy bars a day to 1 might be all the change you need to make. In 2 months, that will add to significant weight loss, all else being equal.

Deal with the uncomfortable but important lesson that there's no secret. There's no magic.

There is only consistent hard work.

Sure, there are quite a few intricacies in the science but for 80% of it, the 20% you need to know and do are the same.

Don't be scammed.

Re-align. Do the work!

And that’s it from me this week. Thank you for your time, and I’ll see you right here next weekend.

I decided to take a break from writing for a week. I am sure you missed me. Well, back at it from today.

Here are the two pieces I have for you:

* Making a case for keeping a much closer eye on effort and a softer eye on the results. As opposed to the current mentality of only the results matter.

* Why the time delay in our body is important to acknowledge and understand.

Let’s get into it!

Note: Slight glitch and I lost the last 10 seconds of audio :(

Keep a closer eye on your effort

Starts when you are young

Let's start with my favourite template - exams. It does not matter how well you've understood your subject. What matters is what marks you are getting on that darn exam. Because it is with those marks that you make your case for the next step in your life. Public examinations in XII determine your college, and so on.

Today, it is straightforward to recognise that it is a dumbed-down tool. A tool designed to solve a problem - sift through a large number of people and rank them. Then, put them into appropriate buckets. But the larger our population gets, the larger the numbers everywhere, and the more this system propagates itself.

Results = Effort

You see this mentality across the board. It is simpler to measure results. In sport, Did you win? is the only measurement needed. Makes sense. In the money-driven and cut-throat world of top-level sport, sure.

But why do you need to take the same approach in your life? Especially in your health and fitness?

Many modern-day tools - wearables and new tech - want you to measure your results. You measure your success at the gym based on whether you achieved your training goal or not. If you went on a training plan to improve your endurance, you need to know if your final measurement was higher than your initial measurement. For example, if you ran 5k in 30 minutes and 8 weeks later you ran it in 27 minutes, there's the proof!

The results are a direct consequence of your effort.

Not that simplistic

But many times, especially at your level, things are more complicated than this simple equation. You are not a measure of your 5k. Your work-life balance, your relationships, your friendships, your sanity - all of them matter. But you allow life to pull you along and make some semblance of it by looking at a microcosm and measuring it.

Everything is fine when that measurement points in the right direction. And everything is terrible when it is not.

And you tend to miss the larger picture by hiding behind this.

Keep an eye on the results

You need to measure results. There is no doubt about it. But there needs to be more thought while measuring effort.

As more and more tools flood the market and promise you more control - Continuous Glucose Monitors are the latest - the idea is to keep a close eye on the effort-results connection. A CGM, for example, allows you to see immediate consequences. It is a great tool, especially for diabetics, but all of us could learn from it. But within a month, you should be able to glean all the information from it. After that, it becomes about the quality of effort you are putting in.

Because the results will take care of themselves if your effort is the right quality and quantity.

I am a huge fan of heart-rate monitors. If there's one gadget everyone in fitness needs, it is that. Everything else has a use but is short-term. Your sleep trackers, your pedometers, your whatevers - they can keep tracking. They are useful to keep an eye on. To make sure the effort and results correlate. But one does not need to keep obsessing over them, but visit them.

Keep a closer eye on the effort

There needs to be more focus on the effort one is putting in. A 360-degree view of it, rather than sticking to a one-dimensional approach. If you are spending 12 hours at the gym and seeing fat loss, but at the cost of your friendship or job - is that a true result?

If you are at 10% body fat but cannot partake in social gatherings, is that a positive result?

You need to move away from what they say results are. Who are they - the amalgam of the fitness industrial complex (a term I am stealing from Chip Conrad), the media and whoever is out there to make a profit - that's who they are.

They don't have your best interests in mind. They have their best interests in mind. That's how it is.

So, you put on your thinking hat. And keep an eye on your effort. And the results. But remember, if the effort is true, the score takes care of itself.

When poor results come by, a post-mortem needs to be done on the effort. Nowhere else.

As I understand more of the philosophy that drives me, I realise the two big efforts of my life stay true to this. At The Quad, our primary mantra to our students is to get them to show up. At Daily9, it is all about clarifying what the effort one needs to put in is.

It is not because of The Quad and D9 that I am preaching this. It is because I (and my co-founders) know this (effort!) to be true that we came up with the experience that focuses on it.

TLDR: Focus on effort. Keep an eye on the results. Both need a broader view than you currently have.

The Time Delay

Stomach Calling Brain

There's a simple reason that you tend to overeat. The signalling from your stomach/gut to your brain needs a bit of time. The appropriate chemical signals need to be sent. That's why something as simple as eating slow and waiting for a bit before seconds and thirds is a game-changer.

Likewise, many things in the body are not instant. You cannot go lift a bunch of weights and expect to have muscles tomorrow. Remember, soreness is not an indicator of much. Except that you are sore.

There are good things coz of this time delay as well. If you take a break of a week or two from your strength training, your strength does not drop. Endurance has a slightly lesser time but the idea more or less holds. Your body remembers and it will continue to stay strong, as long as you pick it back up in that time.

Instant Gratification

You start a new diet. You see some cool immediate results. You expect it to continue week on week but in about 3 weeks, the slowdown is clear.

And then it stalls.

What do you do now?

Well, you have two options. Do something else and confuse your body. Or stick with the plan.

It Takes Time

You double-down on it. That's what you should do.

Changing up the landscape inside your body takes time. For it to understand that you are putting the right fuel, the right stressors, and clearing up your sleep debt. The organic machine starts to work better.

It takes a while to build momentum. And it takes a few days for results to show. And sometimes, it won't show for a couple of weeks too. There are way too many complicated things going on. You cannot flip a switch and expect to see results.

Oh, but I've been eating salads for lunch and dinner and I've lost only a kilo

Sure. It happens.

Remember, if you are doing most things right, the key is to continue. That's how you make long-term progress. You become healthier and fitter. You (eventually) reach your goal. But by that time, you have changed. You have new goals.

Stay on the path. Take breaks. There are useful things coz of this time delay - remember, your strength and endurance do not drop immediately.

And not so fun things, like instant gratification. But that's something you can prepare for and learn to enjoy. Let "this will take time" be the mantra rather than "are we there yet?"

And that’s it for today. Be back with 3 posts from next Sunday.

Welcome to another edition of the Sunday newsletter. Here are the 3 things for today.

* Hot water + lemon + ginger is a famous solution, but to what, no one really knows. Should it be derided? Or is it magic? The science might be irrelevant here.

* Do you stifle your stupid ideas? Or do you let them out?

* A student story to inspire you. From being unable to walk pain-free to making their dream come true.

Even Magic Needs a Bit of Help

Drinking hot water along with ginger and lemon and honey. I am sure you have a bunch of people in your close circle who swear by it. Is there any magic to it? Or is this routine nonsense? If you look hard enough on the Internet, you can find theories to support anything you'd like. That's not what I am asking for.

On the surface level, c'mon!?!? It is hot water and some grated ginger and lemon. And honey, which is sugar. Can this do something to your innards and help burn your fat? Common sense says not.

But does that matter? Not at all.

For some, it is a ritual. It is a daily reminder that they are focusing on their health. Starting the day off with this is a great way to check-in with their mind and body.

For some, this might be ALL that they do towards health and fitness. Well, in that case, not much is gonna happen. Because if you don't eat your veggies and go for your walk and all that, nothing's gonna happen. Even magic needs a little bit of help.

And hey, who knows! Maybe in a few years, scientists will find out that ginger and lemon and honey and hot water combine to do some fat burning and we cannot see the mechanism yet. Or not.

It doesn't matter. If it is a ritual that works for you, that's great. You do your thing!

Stupid Ideas

Sometimes, your stupid ideas are not that stupid.

Occasionally, during sleep, I have a tendency to keep my mouth open and breathe. This leads to snoring, a dry throat, and waking up feeling not well-rested. Since this was not a regular phenomenon, I didn't do much about it for a while.

And then, a few years back, I spent a few more minutes thinking about it. I wrote down what I ate or did the previous evening on mornings I woke up after mouth breathing during sleep.

I focus a lot on nasal breathing and diaphragmatic breathing. In spite of this, why am I doing this, and is there a simple way to do something about it?

There was, much to the chagrin of my wife. I taped my mouth shut at night with 3M micropore tape. And voila!

From then on, whenever I do something that fits the pattern of "gonna mouth breathe tonight" (drinking alcohol, for example) I tape my mouth.

Much later, I read James Nestor's book on this where he tried out the same tactic. It was reassuring to know I was not an idiot making up stupid ideas and gave me more operating liberties with my wife who was often startled silly by my experiments.

Sometimes, stupid ideas are stupid. But many times, follow your gut. Coz your stupid ideas might be genius.

Fools try to make people like them; wise men strive to like others.– Ruskin Bond

So put your books and formulas aside; dare to abandon your teacher whoever your teacher may be and see things for yourself. Dare to look at everything around you without fear and without formula and it won't be long before you see.– Anthony de Mello

Student Story: Prioritise Yourself and Achieve Your Wildest Dreams

Unable to walk pain-free

What if you were unable to walk one hundred metres without feeling pain? What if climbing up one flight of stairs filled you with trepidation and angst?

I have the unbelievable opportunity to work with folks of different strokes (all general population i.e. not athletes.) And the scenario described above is, unfortunately, getting a bit common. I've seen a steady increase in the number of people who have painful joints that impair the most basic of activities.

I've had people aim for varied goals, from jumping off a helicopter and surviving in the wilds for two weeks to hiking in the Himalayas to being able to squat. But the person in this story started off with the situation described above - unable to walk without pain.

The goal we set was to be pain-free and walk 100 metres. And they set a loftier goal, one connected to their heart, which was to visit a temple and do the traditional walk up the hill.

Not taking care of the knee pain

This seems incredible but a lot of you deal with a little bit of pain. While some of these need you to see a specialist, there is a lot of low hanging fruit.

* Tightness from poor posture

* from sitting too much

* from inactivity

* from a lack of stretching

* from old injuries

These are all too common and this results in a symptom of pain. In many instances, the pain is not a serious issue but it will take a bit of work to undo. For example, many people are still unaware that knee pain in the front of your knee could be due to very tight hips. And that stretching your glutes and foam rolling them can make you feel better. The pain starts off by being something mild that a little bit of twisting this way and that way seems to help with. Seeing a physio seems too much work and rehab drills are way too boring. And it accumulates.

This person, let's call them DS, was no different. Even with crazy knee pain, they were taking care of everyone around her - the spouse, the kids, the in-laws. And was only in their late 30s.

Strength training did not seem like an option because one assumes that strong people go do strength training to get stronger and bigger.

But no, strength training is for EVERYONE!

Wake up call

A health scare in the family shook them up and to show support to their spouse (who was advised immediate physical activity) they came along and joined our community.

Hitting the bottom is a good thing. If I hadn't hit my bottom, I would not have stuck with running. I knew that if I gave up this time, the odds of getting fit were slim. Likewise, a health scare is a useful kick up the butt. One wishes to not go there but if it works, it works.

Prioritise yourself

The first goal was to teach mobility and strength. But since pain existed, helping them move pain-free took precedence. With sensible strength training and fundamentals like the plank and goblet squat, you can achieve both strength and mobility goals. Adequate stretching and release work pointed the right direction for knee pain, as it was not a deeper issue but from tight hips.

But the biggest win was when they learned to prioritise themselves, rather than everyone around them. Over the next 6 months, from hobbling with pain to being pain-free, to learning to sleep more and sleep better, they slowly worked on a healthier lifestyle. They

* turned showing up to class into a habit.

* prioritised sleep and healthy eating.

* prioritised themselves, rather than being a martyr.

Be the change

Patience was one of their strong points. From the outset, they were not in a rush. They understood there was a bit of work to undo, and they took the time. Even a full-depth squat took a few months, but sumo deadlifts and step-ups (over different elevations) helped build the same patterns.

But they were clear - show up!

And they kept showing up. Over the course of the year, they built up to a strong deadlift, moved on to learning kettlebell swings. And as the knee pain receded, the goblet squat became deeper and deeper.

Walking became pain-free and their day-to-day experience improved leaps and bounds.

Change Maker

By taking control of their health, they became a change-maker for their entire family. They prioritised sleep and nutrition for the entire family. They focused on themselves and made sure "me time" happened.

But they achieved their personal peak when they did their walk, to their holy place. Forget knee pain, here was someone who was unable to walk 100 metres a bit over a year ago. That personal victory, achieved over many months of toil and ups and downs and patience, helped send a signal to themselves. They were in control!

At The Quad (and gyms all over), there are tremendous stories of inspiration. From an absolute measure, none of them will make headlines. But who cares?! From an individual's point of view though, the results and stories and transformations are incredible. And they can serve to inspire more.

Strength is for everyone

Strength does not mean lifting stupid weights and being huge.

It means being able to pick things up from the floor and carry them. Most of us tend to get distracted by how much.

Strength means both inner and outer strength.

Be strong enough, and a lot of good things follow.

And that’s it for this week’s edition. Have a great Sunday!

I am excited about the three posts I have for you today.

* How to use the concept of reverse linear progression to help you stop when you are full, rather than overeat without meaning to.

* A simple thought on Play.

* How to learn to create the hardest plank you have ever done. And why that is important!

Here we go.

Reverse Linear Progression

Free lunch

The first time I heard the word burrito was when Chipotle opened up near campus, where I was in grad school. A free burrito for anyone for the grand opening. For a broke-ass grad student, what grander invitation is there? So, I and a couple of my classmates stood in line for a few blocks and I got my free lunch.

This was only a month after I had moved to the US and my appetite and portion sizes were about the same as they were in India. For those of you who have eaten American portions, you know there's a huge difference.

I started to gobble up my food but I could barely make a dent at it. In fact, I saved up more than half of my burrito and ate that for dinner. Free lunch AND dinner!

My first chocolate milkshake

In fact, on my first day in town, I went to get a burger and got a chocolate milkshake as well. Coz I love that stuff. It was at Steak N Shake, for those of you who are curious.

It was the first time in my life that I could not finish a milkshake. In fact, I did not finish what was in my glass. In diners like these, they give you a tall glass and the big jar that they blended the milkshake in, to pour into your glass once you were done with your first serving. Ridiculous, I thought!

I was in shock and sadness. For wasting an amazing chocolate milkshake. I couldn't believe it.

Fast-forward

In less than 6 months, I was easily polishing off my Chipotle burritos. And finishing the gargantuan milkshakes after a night of dinner and drinks.

What the heck happened? Simple. Linear progression.

It happened slowly but steadily. The second time I had a burrito, I ate a bit more than half. About 2 months in, I was starting to eat 2/3rds of it. And of course, the burrito was a simple watermark. But for every food plate that I encountered, I would pack half of it and eat it later. But slowly the quantity I was taking home reduced. Eventually, in just under 6 months, I was eating American-sized portions aka f*****g gargantuan portions that you have no business eating.

Overeat

You've eaten more than you should have. Multiple times. You feel full and not so good. And chastise yourself. But the food was soooo good and you couldn't help it.

This occasional over-eating is not what I am talking about. Your stomach size, your portion sizes are still what they are. This is why when you suddenly stuff in a lot more, it feels terrible.

But in my not-at-all unique case where I went from eating less than half a burrito to finishing a full one, slowly my mind and body got used to the larger sizes. I slowly trained my stomach to enlarge and accept and want more food. My hormonal signalling also modified itself to allow more food intake.

How the heck is any of this useful?

It is a two-way street!

Let me explain. You can train your mind and body to eat lesser portion sizes as well, in the same way. Today, if you suddenly eat half of your regular portion, you are gonna feel hungry. But if you eat 95%, you'd barely know the difference. Slow your eating, double your chewing and it becomes rather simple. And over 6 months, you can reduce your portion sizes to whatever is the appropriate amount.

Please note that I am not asking you to starve or eat half your food only, indiscriminately. We live in a day and age where we over-consume calories too easily. We eat more than we should. And it is simply because we have, unconsciously, put our mind and body on a linear progression.

Slowly, you can reverse it.

The concept of linear progression in strength training or in endurance work is rather similar. Do just a little bit more than what you did today. And soon enough, you are doing a lot more while expending the same amount of effort.

If you feel you over-eat...

Here's what you have to do. Simple linear reverse progression.

Eat slower. Chew more. And eat just a little less than you normally do.

Many times, we have a number in our heads coz that's the number we are used to. We don't listen to our bodies anymore. Instead of eating when we are hungry, we eat coz it is 9 pm or whatever.

While those are long-term fixes to do, my burrito eating and milkshake drinking should shine a bulb about your own eating habits over the last 10-20 years. I've had two people tell me that over the pandemic, all they did was something similar and their doctors are rather happy with them.

Linear reverse progression to find the right portion sizes for you. Do it!

Play

I used to think play meant only playing sports or video games. A few years ago, I, unfortunately, stopped doing both. And it definitely brought about more grumpiness in my life. Then, I realised that I could play with a variety of activities. What was essential were finding an enjoyable activity, discovery, learning, fun, community (occasionally) and improving in skill without making that the focus.

Having enough play in my life is mandatory. And learning to think about it differently has opened up a lot more.

No one can show you how to do it, because he would be giving you a technique, he would be programming you. But watch yourself. When you talk to someone, are you aware of it or are you simply identifying with it? When you got angry with somebody, were you aware that you were angry or were you simply identifying with your anger?– Anthony de Mello

Reality is apparent when one ceases to compare.There is "what is" only when there is no comparison at all,and to live with what is,is to be peaceful.– Bruce Lee

HowTo: Plank Hard Enough to Hold Up a Building

Linkage and Tension

The plank is one of the fundamentals of strength training. In fact, I think the word strength training turns some people off coz it is a bit scary. Let's try again.

The plank is one of the fundamental ways in which you re-train yourself to use your body the way it should be.

Even as you progress in your skills, how well you can plank continues to play a rather important role. Because your skill in planking keeps improving in subtle and invisible ways. Let me explain.

* The plank is an expression of linkage. From head to toe, your muscles and joints link with each other to create absolutely no weak links in the chain.

* The top of the squat is a plank with a load on you. The top of the swing is a plank with a bell pulling you away. The deadlift is a moving plank.

* How well you can create and maintain this linkage determines how well you learn to move and express your body.

* The plank is also about creating tension. How much can you tense all the muscles in your body? Our muscles are already a bit tense, called muscle tone. If they were fully off, we would collapse into a bag of bones. Squeeze your fists - you just increased the muscle tone around your fist and forearm.

* Thus, the plank allows you to get better at linkage and tension.

The heavier loads you need to lift, the faster you need to run, or the higher levels of skill you seek in your domain, these two fundamentals play a huge role.

And you can constantly keep working on them via your plank and its progressions.

Upping the Intensity

The mind needs to get better at talking with the body. The signals to tighten up and move in a certain fashion comes from there. That's why, when you start off, you feel ungainly but slowly, as neuromuscular coordination improves, you start to lift more, look better and all that.

One of the simple ways we improve our skills is by increasing the intensity of the exercise. Simply put, if you add more weight to your squat, you will automatically have to create more tension and better linkage. Or you fail.

Many exercises use leverage to up the intensity of the exercise as well. They all work. The idea is to get to improving our skills. And intensity teaches this like no other.

Caveat

Most of you rush to lift more weights or run faster or run longer. Yes, while that's what I said about upping the intensity, you do this only on a firm foundation. And you never neglect the fundamentals.

I've done this. Rushed to lift more load coz it is a rush. It is fun.

You can learn from my mistakes or make your own and then learn from them.

Do not be in a rush to up the intensity.

My best recent plank

While I plank as part of my warmup in almost every training session, there is an upper limit on how much tension I am able to create neurologically. This is simply a matter of me training my mind.

It is a skill - the skill of tension and relaxation. The higher up the athlete chain you go, the better they are at this. Why are some people able to lift crazy weights - not just their training etiquette and all that but they've worked on the skill to tense their muscles more. And if you can do this without props i.e. if you can create as much tension to lift 20 kilos as you create when you lift 75 kilos, you are on to something. That's a great skill.

Our content team does some amazing work - check them out over here. Recently, they were working and I got to goof around with them. It ended up with Coach Sudeep, all 75 kilos of him, sitting on me while I planked.

The linkage and tension I automatically generated was a new level that I have not done in my planks or weighted movements. He first sat with his legs on the floor and slowly transitioned to putting his full weight on me. And my body automatically started creating more tension and linkage. There were some gaps that I did not know existed that were tightened up. For example, how much I could pull up my quads and tense them, as well as how much I could drive my heels down - the intensity made me reach a higher level.

Don't do this at home

Which, of course, you are gonna.

The learning from something like this, or squatting a crazy load, is to bring it back into the other parts of your training. My mind and body accessed this and I need to keep working at accessing this. Now that it knows to generate this much tension and linkage, if I can learn to do it without Sudeep sitting on me, that's a gargantuan software upgrade.

Remember, the hardware's already there. We chip away at getting it better. But the software is something we tend to neglect, and that's what this 10-second plank helped me with.

Now that I know what's possible and more importantly, my body has felt it, I can work on re-create it.

If there's one simple point to this story, it is this. Learn to lift your light weights as if they were heavy. That's how your heavy weights become light.

Safety

Don't do this at home. Except that's an obvious signal for you to do it immediately. Please stay sensible. I have had 12+ years of training experience and I can press half my body weight.

* Do not start off with someone heavier than you.

* Do not have them jump or stand on you.

* Have them sit with their feet on the floor. And slowly put more weight on you.

* Play around with it. Be sensible.

Thanks for reading. I’d truly appreciate it if you can share ONE post with ONE friend.

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to speak with a few members of The Quad community about motivation. These are not folks I interact with on a regular basis, as our community has grown truly beyond the confines of our first two centres. Every time I have to verbalise my learnings, by speaking or writing, the push to be more clear is scary and useful. Feynman’s “If you cannot explain to a 7-year old…” is a great litmus test. And it also indicates a requirement for further introspection.

Only by writing more and speaking more will things get clear.

Anyhoo, on to the 3 things I have for you this week. I am pretty happy with how they’ve come out and I am 100% sure you will find one of these pertinent.

* Whose permission do you need? What are you waiting for to do that thing you wanna do?

* Subtraction is a superpower. It seems to take more courage to stop doing something than to start something new.

* How to find your sweet spot. Without being distracted by labels and ideologies, without boxing yourself in one corner. But exploring other sides of yourself to find yourself.

My request to you - please share ONE article with ONE friend and help me grow my readership. Seriously. Don’t skim past this. It matters more than you think.

Whose permission do you need?

What are you waiting for to do that thing you wanna do?

It keeps coming up but you keep finding excuses not to do it. You keep shoving it away. It comes along with a slightly queasy feeling in the belly. And you push it away some more. Coz it is not practical, you say. You have too much work. You have responsibilities.

Sure.

But if it is not going away, there is something to it. It connects with you at a deeper level that you are not willing to dig, understand or acknowledge.

It could be something simple. For example, I've been wanting to eat my dinner before 7 pm i.e. at least 3 hours before bed. But I've not done it in so many years. I was chatting with an alternative medicine practitioner and they suggested this as part of our conversation. Well, apparently, I needed their permission to finally get around to doing this.

How silly is that?!

So, your turn. What is that thing you keep shoving away? And whose permission do you need?

Only yours. But if, like me, you want a random person to give you permission - well, here you go ;)

Subtraction is a superpower

It seems to take more courage to stop doing something than to start something new.

The easier decision is to add more things to the pile. Because you do not want to subtract. What if that thing you subtract is actually the next Facebook?

Reducing big rocks does NOT mean you are going to sit around twiddling thumbs, although there's nothing inherently wrong with that. It simply means you will dedicate more time to spend on the remaining big rocks.

Subtraction is a superpower.

Expect anything worthwhile to take a long time.– Debbie Millman

The best mirror is an old friend.– George Herbert

How to find your sweet spot

Have you not felt abysmal or unproductive in certain times and places? Every time you forget who you are, where you are, what drives you, when and where you thrive, sub-par things seem to happen.

The obvious example is introversion versus extroversion. The morning after a party, introverts are better off chilling by themselves, reading a book and doing their thing. But that does not mean you put yourself and live permanently in the introvert box i.e. you avoid parties and external contact and social settings.

There is a difference between understanding yourself and utilising that information and behaving around it, versus using that framing to define and stifle yourself.

Time

Let's take a different example - being present- versus future-focused. Quoting Derek Sivers,

Some people are mostly focused on the present moment. They live for today and do what feels good right now.Some people are mostly focused on the future. They use today as a stepping stone and do what’s best for their future selves.

The idea is not about identifying what your skew is. But using that to switch to the appropriate focus for the appropriate situation.

Too much present-focus could mean you are leaving out something in the long term. For a variety of goals, you need delayed gratification to be a factor. Long-term visions take time to plan and execute.

Too much future-focus could mean you are missing out on being in the moment. You are failing to appreciate what's going on around you.

It is imperative to find the balance between the two mindsets. Finding the right mindset for the current situation, even more so.

Ideology

Too often, we box ourselves based on our beliefs and ideologies. I used to use my introversion as an excuse to avoid meeting people. But that's not the point at all. The point was to understand my introversion and my energy and to tailor my week based on that. I do not want to be a hermit and for all of my friends to forget me. At the same time, I know I will be a wreck if I meet them too often, or in social situations that are not my cuppa tea. Knowing this has helped me connect and interact with my friends a lot more often than I used to while leaving me with a lot more energy.

Awareness

If I could turn back time and teach myself three concepts as a teenager, they would be

* Introversion.

* Lifting weights.

* Self-awareness.

Not only does awareness seem to be key, but it also seems to be the lever around which anything can happen. Knowing what you are, what is required at the present moment, and pivoting is a superpower.

Balance

If you don't know who you are, can you do what you are here to do? Spoken like a true over-thinker but that's another label I realise I do not have to be tied to. Whenever I realise I am diving into my over-thinker syndrome, I catch myself and I attempt to switch into a different line of enquiry.

Previously, I would be unaware and continue digging the overthinking hole. And leave myself paralysed after exploring so many choices. And feel drained and end up with " do something already!" As I write this out, maybe that's why I was never good at chess.

What labels have you given yourself? Instead of defining yourself by those labels, can you instead use them as a tool? Use them when they are required. Use the complementary tool - introvert vs extrovert; present-focus vs future-focus; over-thinker vs go-with-the-flow - and explore both options.

Balance does not mean 50/50. Balance simply means to move away from your box, to move away from 100/0 to find your sweet spot.

Thanks for reading and sharing some of your Sunday with me. You have a great week, and I’ll see you here in a few! And have you shared one post yet?!?!

Hope your Sunday is going well. Here are the 3 things for today:

* Bleary-eyed and Sleepy. When you wake up groggy, do you go back to bed? Or do you suck it up and head to the gym? A guideline for answering perplexing questions.

* Missing out. What are you truly missing out on?

* Fear of the Start. Three simple steps you can take today to work on this fear, and transform your fitness journey.

Bleary-eyed and Sleepy

You went to bed late, only after midnight. You woke up at 5.30 am, thanks to your alarm. Do you go to the gym? Or do you turn it off and sleep in?

You are trying to eat zero sugar. You finish your dinner. And you want just a hit of sugar to polish things off. Do you? Or do you fight the craving and stick to the plan?

You are out having beers. Do you give in to the party mood and have 3 beers too many, which you know you will be annoyed with tomorrow when you wake up? Or do you stick to your preset decision?

The fun part about life is it is unpredictable. And how we react to the same situation in multiple ways adds to the unpredictability.

The right answer to all of the above is - It depends. I cannot answer it for you. Only you can.

Some days, the right answer is to sleep in. Some days, the right answer is to suck it up and go in and lift.

But I'll give you a guideline I follow for habits that I want to stick to but also leave some slack in the system - Don't repeat it two days in a row. For example, if I miss my breathing drills tonight - it happens. But I am definitely doing them tomorrow, come what may. If I am eating candy tonight as if I have not seen candy before, no f*****g candy tomorrow. Even if the candy gods come home and give me the bestest candy in the world.

Don't repeat it two days in a row.

Missing Out

If you look at the things you have or can do versus what is out there, you are always missing out on something.

There's always a better workout system, a better diet that will get you ripped faster, a better mattress, a better whatever.

But if you look at what truly makes you happy, it is outside of all of these things. Because it is in the things you already have and do.

A great book is a friend that never lets you down. You can return to it again and again and the joy first derived from it will still be there.– Ruskin Bond

Be humble because you are made of earth.Be noble, for you are made of stars.– a Serbian proverb I found in Matt Haig's book

Fear of the Start

Unfortunately, a common story I hear from people who want to get started in fitness is that they are scared to start. I've heard this from friends and students whose family members are inspired by but unable to make the leap. I've even heard this from old students of mine - people take a break but have let themselves go (their words) and are scared to come back.

You are scared because it is out of your comfort zone.

You are scared because you are not sure if you picked the right answer.

You are worried if you are gonna make a fool out of yourself.

You are concerned that you might get hurt.

You are unsure if what you are doing is good for you.

You are a bit embarrassed at your current level of fitness and don't want to be judged.

You are concerned if you will be able to keep it up.

Let me remind you of a couple of things. Most of the people you see who have effected a change almost always hit rock bottom.

The best thing about rock bottom is the rock part. You discover the solid bit of you. That bit that can't be broken down further. The thing that you might sentimentally call a soul. At our lowest we find the solid ground of our foundation. And we can build ourselves anew.

And here's another quote from a different context, from Anthony de Mello.

As you begin to observe yourself, to watch yourself, to pick up those negative feelings, you'll find your own way of explaining it. And you'll notice the change. But then you'll have to deal with the big villain, and that villain is self-condemnation, self-hatred, self-dissatisfaction.

Do you find yourself scared to start? It is okay. You are most definitely not alone. I recall the absolute cluelessness I was faced with for an entire year, as I searched for what to do. As I kept trying to do things.

What I'd suggest are three things:

* Write down what is troubling you. Write down your fear(s). When you put it down, it becomes less of a scary demon.

* Write down a goal. If it is outrageous, break it down a bit more.

* Start doing something. Minimal equipment, minimal investment, and fits into your logistics. Just start.

Once you start walking the path (start doing something) towards a particular direction (your goal) things get simpler. Along the way, you can make adjustments.

Being scared is fine. Being scared into inactivity is not. You can do this!

And that’s it for today. Have a great day and week, and I’ll see you in March!

Hope your weekend is going well and you have had some time to chill.

Here’s what I have for you today.

* on Exams and Recalibration. I love the metaphor of exams and since it is something that has affected most of us who grew up in the Indian education system, I think this will help you look at modern-day examinations differently and productively.

* on Tantrums and Zero Progress. What do you do when you just wanna give up? When you think you are doing the right things but nothing’s happening?!?!

* on Indecipherable Things. What's indecipherable to me today might click in my head in a year or five. And create a paradigm shift. Along with 2 quotes - one from Dave Draper on attitude and one from Jim Collins on leadership.

on Exams and Recalibration

Exams and School

Growing up in our educational system, the exams were the climactic moment of our lives. If things went well, what a relief! You could walk around with relief, you did not have to worry about watching extra TV or grumpy parents or being arm-twisted into studying more. If things did not go well, argh, the annoyance of it all. The extra classes, the extra glares from the teachers, the stamp of idiot student, the curtailing of freedom at home - the world came crashing down.

And these blasted things would repeat multiple times a year. To top it all, there was a ranking system too, so you knew exactly how terrible you were.

The exams were always purported to be the climax. It did not matter if you learned anything. It came down to what your number on the blasted paper was, and on the blue cardboard thing aka the report card.

Benchmarks and Challenges

At the gym, the testing day of your training plan is akin to the exam. It is the climax of that particular training cycle. If you are on a deadlift program, this was the day you attempted to set a new personal record (PR). Or see where your 5k is at. Or whatever the appropriate challenge or benchmark is.

Initially, my brain mapped these benchmarks to exams. But then, I grew wiser.

Because even with a great training ethic, there were times when my benchmarks sucked. I did not set that PR that my training log indicated I was heading towards. I let the pressure and expectation get to me.

But instead, what happened were other random days when I felt like pushing extra, outside of the plan, coz the bar was flying. And PRs were set. This seemed to happen in the morning after a night of poor sleep and/or too much alcohol consumption.

That made no sense. And that gave me the liberty to relax.

Today, more often than not, the benchmarks and challenges and exams go as per plan. Because I am a lot more calm and relaxed about it. Because I do not have any expectations or pressure.

With that came a simple realisation.

Sandbox

The exam is not the climax. The exam is simply meant to be a place of assessment and understanding. That's it. As simple as that.

If your exam went well, then your prep is on track. Your technique is solid, the amount of work you are putting in is ample. If your exam goes poorly, that means you need to dig deeper into your prep. Do you need to improve your deadlifting technique? Do you need to spend more time on fundamentals? Do you need to rest more? It could be anything.

But that's all it is. An assessment. A place to recalibrate. And update the plan for the next few weeks.

A better plan = a better result. Almost always. And if not, s**t happens. Tweak the plan. Keep showing up.

on Tantrums and Zero Progress

You are eating well. You are getting your vegetables and limiting the processed foods. And yet, the waist does not reduce!

You love your job and are great at it. But work keeps accumulating and the pandemic keeps throwing curveballs at you. How many can you keep dodging and solving?!

You've made it a habit of getting an activity. And you are starting to love it, and how you feel after doing it. But it is bringing along niggles and aches and blisters and such. And the blasted waist is still not reducing?!!?

It is okay to get annoyed and angry and feel helpless and throw a tantrum. Get it out of your system.

But what's next? That's the crucial part. That is going to determine long-term success. You have to look ahead and plan for the next week and month.

If you think what you are doing is working, well, the waist should come down. Or whatever it is you have identified as the one thing to measure. If that is not progressing in the right direction, you don't have to throw everything out and start again.

But you do need to take a closer look at your methods and assumptions. Maybe you need to calorie count for a week or two. Maybe you need to up your activity levels. Make a change, observe the outcomes and see if that gets things moving in the right direction.

Getting frustrated is absolutely fine. Wanting to punch a wall and/or scream in annoyance - all okay. Get it out of your system.

But at the end of it, your first job is to plan the next step. Breathe. Compose yourself. And take a look at things.

Remember, you are not going through this alone. Everyone around you is if that makes you feel any better. But it is up to you.

You cannot control the outcome. But you control the probability of the outcome you want. So, figure it out. That part - the figuring out - only you control.

It doesn't mean you have to be a lone warrior and it is you against the world. Your community, your friends, your family - all can play a role. But you have to keep your eye on the ball and be honest. If things are not moving in the way you want, you have to figure it out and change it up.

So, get that tantrum out of you and let's do this!

Profound/Obvious/Indecipherable

What's profound to me is obvious to you.

What's indecipherable to me today might click in my head in a year or five. And create a paradigm shift.

I guess that's why the proverb goes that way - when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

And sometimes, when I think/wish I had read that mind-blowing piece of text in my 20s, I do wonder. There's a good chance I didn't have the mental capacity to process it back then. I needed my failures to get ready for them to make sense.

Not one thing about a workout is less than exciting, except your attitude toward it.How can a thing that offers so much, provides so much goodness and hope and exhilaration and esteem be dismal? Where’s the logic or smart thinking in that appraisal?– Dave Draper

The function of leadership - the number one responsibility of a leader - is to catalyse a clear and shared vision for the company and to secure commitment to and vigorous pursuit of that vision.– Jim Collins and Bill Lazier

And that’s it from me for this week. Thank you for spending some of your time over here and I will see you next weekend!

Here are the three things for this week’s edition.

* On highlight reels. And how everyone has it easy. Or do they?

* On the curse of busyness that seems to afflict us all. Part of my sandbox series where I apply my learnings from a simpler universe of a gym to the larger, more complex universe of life.

* On a simple/trivial thought after seeing my dog do the same thing consistently.

On highlight reels

In a world of highlight reels and happy photos, you get misled into thinking that the world is rosy all the time. Or rather, it sucks for you but for everyone else, it seems to be honeymoon time all around.

That's untrue. You are one of those people with your highlight reels that others are looking at and thinking "They have it perfect!" And since you know s**t ain't perfect at your front, guess what the real deal is everywhere.

Social media is a tool and a great window into the parts of people that we don't see. But it is a window into ONE part and not the whole. It is watching Test cricket but the 30-minute highlights at the end of the day - only the fun bits. But it is the mundane that makes everything amazing (life and Test cricket.)

In our day-to-day interactions, the internal conversations that go on in our heads seem to carry a similar story. If the person next to you is lifting more than you are, they have it easy. They are so darn dedicated. And they have great genes. Or whatever it is you think they have that you do not. Likewise, when your friend is making it to the gym with crazy regularity but you are not. Their job is "oh so stress-free", they have a great cook, and they have zero fires in their house.

As someone who went from not knowing what the gym was to spending a lot of time in there and working on my health and fitness, I know that the above is not true. We all know it when we anchor ourselves in our story - that it is mundane and nothing magical. On how we got from that place to where we are at currently.

That's pretty much the same all around. I've had the opportunity to speak with a lot of our students who make this transformation in their lives. And one thing comes up. No one has it easy. The ones that make it look so have their priorities and logistics sorted out, and their brains sorted out. Everyone has good days and bad days, our ups and our downs. We do not advertise it, especially the downs.

Some people have it hard - taking care of a dependent person at home, battling a mental/physical illness that they don't advertise about, a personal crisis that you don't see, a business that is in the red and they are fighting to save. But coz they show up at the gym, or post photos of eating healthy food, we assume that they have it sorted. And they have it easy.

No one has it easy. You can read the Tiger Woods story or Wayne Rooney's latest admission about his drinking to deal with the pressures of playing football at the highest level.

The best part is everyone has it as great and as sucky as you do.

The worst part is everyone has it as great as you do and as sucky as you do.

This means if you aren't getting towards your goals, it all comes down to your actions.

On Busyness

Working out

You head into the gym and you lift some weights, throw them into a circuit and get a good sweat on. And you finish with some HIIT work or metcon or whatever it is that you think is the coolest thing for today. Your calories burned is pretty high and you feel pretty drained. That's a good workout!

The next time you head into the gym, similar strategy. You do a bunch of different things and get a great sweat on and your calories burned is even higher.

And you do this for a few months. And that's the issue. A workout is simply that - working yourself out. It is great to work out. But for the longer term, you want to follow a training plan.

Do you think taking singing/piano/whatever lessons that focus on fundamentals, build up the skills, and progressively challenge you will result in a higher skill level in a year? Or going in and playing a random song today, a different one next week, and a completely new one the week after?

Same idea. Workouts are random for the most part, and focus on "how worked out do you feel?"

Busyness

Where the heck does busyness come in? Well, most of your day is task after task after task. You are working 10-15 hour days. Answering emails while you are on phone calls and juggling meetings. And since you are working from home, there are the chores at home and the family stuff to handle as well. Busy busy busy. Your entire day is pretty hectic, from start to finish. But if you look back at it after a week, you'd be hard-pressed to write down what you actually did during that day.

Quadrant-II and the Eisenhower Matrix

The Eisenhower Matrix is a powerful tool for prioritisation and planning. You break down your tasks into one of the 4 quadrants - Urgent and Not Urgent, Important and Not Important.

And most of you (me included) live way too much in Quadrant-1 i.e. Urgent + Important.

The image above is from James Clear’s article.

Busyness.

You have 10 tasks to do. And you need to do them today. Now!

It makes you feel productive. It makes you feel like you had a good workday.

But it is similar to a workout. You worked yourself out. But what's the long-term game here.

The long-term

The long-term game is in Quadrant-2. Where you prioritise and schedule your Important (and not Urgent) work. What we unfortunately do is keep postponing these things, as they are not Urgent. But they are Important.

Following a training plan is the same deal - you prioritise the long-term. You want what you do today to be part of a larger picture. It feeds and grows you.

You determine what is Important to you and work on it. It is not a task that you can check off within 15 minutes (like answering an email.) But it is a task that needs you to do many repetitions over the next few months.

If you want to write a book, one page at a time. Over many times.

You want to deadlift double your bodyweight, one training session at a time.

F**k Busyness

This busyness is a drain. Being too busy is a red flag. Of someone who does not delegate or prioritise well. Of someone who has not taken the time to understand what is important or long-term. When you are too busy, it is not a matter of pride.

Over the past few years, I've realised I've dug myself into this hole. As I get more and more efficient at what I do and the tasks I can get done in the same time window, I add more tasks to my plate. But the long-term has suffered. My attention span has atrophied. Sitting down and chewing on a problem for a few hours is impossible to do, coz there are 15 emails accumulating and a meeting to go to.

One advantage I have is access to a tremendous community, which includes quite a few successful people who run enterprises way BIGGER than anything I can imagine. And one common thread is they are not busy. They've taken the time to design their lives such that their work-life balance is not skewed. They can and do take the time to do the larger things. That's a simple, clear path to follow and aim for.

Sandbox

As always, it takes a simpler setting for me to understand. Working out is fun. Working out gives you instant gratification.

A training session does not leave you in a pool of sweat. Some training sessions are ridiculously light and short. There's a lot of boredom involved if you look at it on paper. Coz you are repeating the same things over and over and over again.

But working out = busyness. And for the long term, I do not want to keep working out. And I do not want to be stuck in busyness.

F**k busyness. Think long-term.

Now, I am not saying we stop working out or we stop having days where it is all Urgent + Important. But instead, we shift our life where it is 20% busyness and not 80% where it is now. Likewise, working out is fun - so, maybe once a week you do that. But your training plan is what forms the crux of your week.

Friday Thought and 2 quotes

Updog

Every time my dog gets up from a period of lying down or resting or sleeping, she stretches. Upward dog, followed by a downward dog. And this is not unique to my dog, obviously.

Every time.

Maybe, just maybe, every time we sit

* we get up periodically.

* and we do something to loosen up

As silly as this sounds, I am going to do this.

As we spend more and more time sitting, we need to remind ourselves to get distracted and move.

I am always one for analysis paralysis. I will start doing something and then try to do a better stretch or routine. But doing something is the better method.

From The Little Prince

If you were to say to the grown-ups: "I saw a beautiful house made of rosy brick, with geraniums in the windows and doves on the roof", they would not be able to get any idea of that house at all. You would have to say to them: "I saw a house that cost $20,000." Then they would exclaim: "Oh, what a pretty house that is!"– Antoine de Saint-Exupery

From The Comfort Book

The best thing about rock bottom is the rock part. You discover the solid bit of you. That bit that can't be broken down further. The thing that you might sentimentally call a soul. At our lowest we find the solid ground of our foundation. And we can build ourselves anew.– Matt Haig

And that’s it for this edition. Thanks for reading, and I’d love it if you can spread the word (about my blog) to one friend.

Here are the 3 pieces I have for you today.

* Overthinkers United. My thought for the week.

* Should we spice up the truth to make it compete against fads?

* Remove the option to change your mind. A powerful method to help you achieve your fitness and nutrition goals.

Overthinkers United and Quotes for the week

Sometimes, you just know it is right.

My move from SF back to Madras, on paper, looks to be one of the hardest decisions one can make. But honestly, it was obvious and easy. Yes, easy. Because it felt right.

I was not able to articulate the reasons why it felt right but it just did. One of the few times in my life when I let my feeling lead my thinking.

Now, obviously, that does not mean you always go based on your gut. But for the over-thinkers out there, it is a tool to let your body-feel take the lead on things. Rather than drawing out a long list of pros and cons and that rot, just see how it makes you feel.

Your head, well, at least my head is too slow to process my heart and my gut. And simply keeps getting in the way.

The meaning of life is that it is to be lived, and it is not to be traded and conceptualised and squeezed into a pattern of systems.– Bruce Lee

Measuring time isn't as simple as adding or subtracting minutes from a clock. You must find your own measuring stick.– Lindsay Eager

The Boring Truth

Fads make headlines and astounding claims. The results and transformation they offer are tweaked to fit today's trends. And then they die down. Only to re-appear in a few years time, taking advantage of the latest trends and shifts.

They sound much more fun and impactful than the truth. They scratch that itch you have for instant gratification. Even though you know that's not something you should look for. It hits exactly at the chink you have in your armour.

But the truth of most matters has not changed in a long time. Most of the fundamentals about lifting and nutrition have been around from before I was born. I thought everything was discovered in the '50s to the '80s. But the giants in my field reference authors from the early 20th century, and even in the 19th century.

The truth is boring. The truth is unshakeable. Eat the damn veggies. Do some physical activity that you enjoy. Have fun. Don't work too much. Do enough of this for the longer term and you have it all.

Boring does not make it untrue.

And if it sounds too good to be true, guess what?

Remove the Option to Change your Mind

Giving up

Most of you have done diets and done them well. Given up sugar for 4 weeks or been on the Daily9 for 8 weeks and seen tremendous results. And it is not on the nutrition front, right? Going to the gym for January and even February, sticking to your evening walk religiously for many months - you've all done your versions of this and been successful.

But things derail. Even though you know to shift gears from 100% to 80%, that shift seems more difficult than it should be. But why? And is there a way around it?

Well, I've given it away via the title but let me explain with a bit more detail.

Life happens

Most times, things derail because life happens. Pizza and movie night with the family becomes a Sunday brunch, and you wake up Monday morning and see too many empty bottles of beer. F**k yeah, it was a great weekend but ....100% and 0% seem easier to do. But as you've found it, that's not conducive to feeling good over the long term.

Life will happen. There will always be events - expected and unexpected.

Easy to do zero sugar rather than just a little bit

When you are in your zero-sugar zone, you actually get through many of these events with flying colours. Bonus points if you didn't sit on your high horse while doing it but let's give you some leeway even if you didn't. You'll learn being a jerk doesn't help.

But when you slip to the sustainable zone, why does it behave like a slippery slide?!?!

Well, first, the ZERO works because you removed the option to change your mind. You removed decision making. You pre-made your decisions. You aren't going to eat sugar. And since you aren't going to eat sugar, you thought ahead and planned your dinner, your allowed stuff (say, diet Coke) and all that.

You are clear about your goal - ZERO SUGAR. Or whatever it is. But when we go to the 85%, the sustainable zone, the Goldilocks area, the place where you have your cake and get to eat it too - what is the goal?!?!

One goal. One sentence.

Are you clear and committed about your long-term goal? Are you sure? Well then, state it in a sentence. One goal. One sentence.

I'll wait.

.....

Don't skim this over. Do it!

.....

Now, let's think about the pain of NOT getting to your goal. It sucks. You don't feel good about failing at it, yet again. But here you are, yet again. Why oh why?!?

But as Coach Dan John pointed out in my conversation with him - let's talk about the pain of getting to your goal. Because right now, you are not able to handle that pain.

The pain of getting to your goal could involve you missing out on pizza and movie night, on weekly beers and shenanigans with your buddies, not getting to sleep in or not getting to bum around in the night and watch TV and chill with the spouse.

But does it mean that?

Or you could start by listing down all the pains of getting to your goal. The various stumbling points that happen. Your memory is a good start. And you can continue jotting things down as they happen. When the pain of getting to your goal makes you fail, that's okay. Write it down and begin again tomorrow.

In a few months, armed with a lot of pertinent information, you go again.

Now, you are going to decide how to approach them. And remove the option of changing your mind.

One beer night with friends every month. On additional beer nights, you will drink sparkling water.

Weekly pizza and movie night with the kids. You will have pizza once and eat a salad the other 3 times. Movie night and fun times with the kids is still the primary reason, right? And not stuffing your face with pizza.

And so on and so forth.

Ta-da!

Remove the option to change your mind.

When you can impartially look at this, and with a longer-term view, now you know it is simply about doing this for the year.

By removing the option of changing your mind, you've given yourself a lot more freedom, a lot less anxiety, no more decision fatigue.

Every time you fail, you give in to the pain becomes one more thing your log to solve for the next time. Shift your mindset, stop berating yourself about failures.

Instead, commit!

You can do this.

And that’s it for this week. Thanks for your time, and I’ll connect with you next weekend!

Thanks for checking out my Sunday digest. Here are the 3 pieces I have for you today.

* One rep at a time. The real story of how you can conquer your impossible and insurmountable task.

* What do you do after you climb your Everest? Do you hang out there? Or do you come back down?

* My thought on celebrating and acknowledging our uniqueness. And on snowflakes and how it is mind-boggling that they are unique.

One rep at a time

Snap my finger

You have to start somewhere. For me, the day that is etched in my memory is my first-ever 1-mile run. Which I did about a third of and slunk away. My heart wanted it. My head wanted it. My blasted legs did not want any f*****g part of it.

But snap your fingers and say abracadabra, there I was, running 21k at the San Jose Half a few months later.

Off I went to CrossFit, with dreams of 6-pack abs and throwing the barbell around and jumping on boxes my height. Snap my fingers and all I found was myself lying on the floor, ass-whooped after the warmup.

Warmup

I thought Angel (my coach at SFCF who ran the Intro sessions) was the funniest guy when he asked "Are you guys warmed up?" as I valiantly tried not to sway or throw up. But unfortunately, that was really just the warmup. Apparently running 21k does not inject superhumanness into every skill I decided to pick. A harsh lesson to learn, it was.

Not this time

Every time until then, when faced with the reality of a situation similar to this, I had walked away. I had cited some nonsense about how this was not right for me, how the stars were not aligned, blah blah f*****g blah.

But I nailed one thing this time around - from my 28-day yoga, my 21k, and my transformative year and a half at SFCF.

One rep at a time

I changed my goal to one rep at a time. One step at a time. Runners will be mighty familiar with this. Every run starts off the same way - why the f**k am I running?!?! It is always too hot or too cold or too muggy or too something to be running.

Especially when you suck at it, the distances that seem nonchalant to everyone else seem nonsensical to you. Run 3 miles (5k) as a cool-down?! What the fudge is wrong with you people?! That's something that requires hard planning, motivation, a couple of bagels, and good weather.

But I nailed this thing. I'd look at a tree a few metres in front of me and just cajole myself to run to that tree. Once I hit that tree, well, the next tree. No tree in sight - well, that stain on the road, those people walking the dog over there, that turn in the road. You get the idea.

At CrossFit, I revamped this strategy to one rep at a time. Almost every workout would be high volume and HIIT and all that jazz. 30 wall-balls (thrusters with a heavy ball that you throw up a wall, above a certain line), 30 pushups, 30 pullups, 400m run for as many circuits - about the norm. For me, one rep at a time. And when I had no more, pause, and then, you guessed it, one rep at a time. And then move on to the next exercise in the circuit - one rep at a time.

10 sets of 1. Not 1 set of 10.

This radically transformed my fitness. Showing up, obviously. But once I was there, one rep at a time. It allowed me to get my mind to wrap its head around running further and further. It enabled me to finish CrossFit workouts and even get to finishing them somewhere in the middle.

Of course, I tend to get carried away. Aim too high, get burned by the sun and fail. But then, get back, and chant the mantra - one rep at a time. Of course, this is the best one for strength work. But it works for anything, to be honest. A set of 10 swings - Nah. It is 10 sets of 1 rep at a time.

In the present

Much later, I'd discover that this is a lesson to be in the present. To not get caught up by your failures in the past and get demotivated or scared and give in to fear. And to not get caught up in the future, of daydreaming and competing at the CrossFit games or finishing the Ironman, or worrying about how the heck you are gonna get through the rest of this workout when at minute 2/25, you are feeling slightly pukish and at minute 4, you aren't sure which hole things are gonna explode out of.

But one rep at a time. Run to the next tree. Do the next rep perfectly.

Most times, you have the next one after that. You will make it to the next tree. To the next set.

And to the next training session.

Training is my sandbox for life.

Every time I am faced with a difficult situation, something I do not want to be in, something I want to stop doing and do something easier - I tell myself to get to the next tree, to write the next line, the next paragraph, to do the next rep. And breathe. And then, one more rep. Just one more.

It works.

It works every time.

Funnily, when I don't listen to it, it doesn't work.

Every time I have the guts to listen to my learning - one rep at a time - it f*****g works. Across the board. Across whatever I wanna do, or rather, don't wanna do.

Couch to 5k - one rep/tree at a time.

Lose 50 kilos - one rep/day/kilo at a time.

Be in the present, the here and now and all that jazz might sometimes seem nonsensical speak. Well, of course, it is not. You make it into a version that works for you.

One rep at a time.

What do you do after you climb your Everest?

Summiting Everest is a challenge that sits at the back of quite a few of our minds. A challenge that will need a lot of courage, training, willpower, stamina, strength, and a whole lot more. You train for it, for months or years, depending on your current physical and mental levels. You might need to have quite a few practices climbs, over lesser peaks.

So, you do. You train for it. You dedicate the better part of your mind and body and money and energies to this huge endeavour.

Whatever your Everest is.

And you do it! What an achievement.

Only you know the hardships, the number of days when you were sore or didn't want to do it. But you showed up anyway. The days when everyone else was sleeping and comfortable but you woke up while it was pitch-dark outside and did your thing. The days when it was easy. The days when it was impossible. The days when everything else was overwhelming and you questioned your sanity about this stupid meaningless challenge.

But you did it. You f*****g beauty!

What next?

First up, Everest is a metaphor. Of course, you can literally be climbing up Everest. Or a moderate hill in the mountains. Or walking 5k. Or touching your toes. Whatever your Everest is - whatever seems impossible but you know is about figuring out the next rep and showing up as many times as it takes to get the job done.

But what next? Once you are at the peak? As Coach Dan John reminds us, the step after a peak is a cliff. Meaning it is a fall and a long way down. If you continue to persist in climbing more and more and more - that's what is going to happen. Your mind, body or spirit will fail without adequate replenishment, celebration, and a breather.

Let's stay on top

But that's what a lot of us think we need to do. We need to climb Everest and stay on top of it. For one, the oxygen is rather low. There's no WiFi. Or showers and loos and all that. So, you cannot live there.

So, come on back down and let's have a party!

You come back down, you chill. You recognise that you have the ability, the drive, the "whatever it takes" to do such a crazy feat. You have that gear in you. But you don't keep staying at that gear.

You find something else that grows you and challenges you. Whether it is a path that forks off the main one or is tangential to it - as long as you connect with it. But one thing is clear - staying on top AND doing something else makes little sense.

How is this relevant to you?

* You think getting a 6-pack is the end of the road. Nopes. Some of you might be able to do that and continue. But most of you (us, I should say, so as to include myself as I fall in here) will get there sometimes and not get there most other times. And you will be so annoyed that you might not even notice the view.

* You cannot stay there. Let's do something else. And it need not mean climbing K2. What about going on a pleasant trek, filled with meadows and trees and flowers? And not just freeze-your-tingly-privates-cold weather and inhumane conditions?!?! Not everything needs to challenge you to your core.

* You think coz everyone's climbing Everest, that you climbing the large hill or going on that almost-flat trek is useless or pointless. No, buddy! You go do your thing. Everest gets the headlines coz we all like big numbers and bullcrap like that.

The radical middle

Instead, let's think different. Imagine you are piloting a spaceship, Mario/Contra/Prince of Persia like - 2D and scrolling horizontally. There are sharp pointy things at the top of your screen. And sharp pointy things at the bottom of your screen. Your job is to stay away from these and closer to the middle as you make forward progress.

Along the way, shiny objects - jewels and fruits and health kits and what-not - pop up and you have to veer away from the middle to collect them. The bigger the reward, the closer it is to the pointy things.

Most of the time you choose to get things that are a tad easier - still well away from the middle but you know 99% of the time, you can get it and come back to safety. But what's life without a bit of adventure? So, you most definitely go for the precarious ones as well. Sometimes, you swoop in and get out at the right instant. Most times though, you get too close and you crash and burn.

Thankfully, it is a video game. So, you materialise again and you continue.

The harder the challenge, the crazier the diet, the further away from the goal (from where you are), the more imbalanced it is going to be. The closer you are gonna get to sharp, pointy things. The higher the probability of crashing and burning.

Instead of wanting ONLY the challenging things every time, mix it up. Build up skills and points and what-not, and go for the crazy things. If you crash, no problem. Start again. Have the patience to repeat the easy stuff and go again. And if you don't crash, beware of that too. In fact, beware that more.

Back to the middle. Back to the fundamentals for the most part. And the crazy challenges sprinkled in. Not expecting to stay on Everest after climbing it. But coming back down and moving on to other things.

Friday Thought, and 2 quotes

Snowflakes

Did you know that snowflakes are unique i.e. no two flakes are alike?

Think about that. Isn't that f*****g incredible?!?! Of the millions of flakes that are going to fall, none of them will resemble each other.

They have the common root - a six-branch structure which is defined due to how the two Hydrogen atoms bond with the Oxygen and the angle of that and other science-y stuff. But the reason they evolve into a different shape is simply coz of the subtle variations during their actual formation as it falls down. The exact temperature, the humidity, the makeup of the atoms and the collisions along the way - albeit a few centimetres - leads to a unique shape. So, even if two flakes are within inches of each other, their exact path varies and so they end up looking different.

That strike you somewhere?

You are unique. You are a composite of all your experiences so far. How you react to something today is hard to explain because there have been so many collisions and interactions along the way. Maybe you got bullied in school, maybe you were made fun of for being short, maybe you were always late or always early, or you hit the books or the playground. Across the spectrum of a million things, your interactions and reactions vary subtly and grossly from someone else, even if they grew up in the same household.

You are you. That's the beauty of it. While we can all be generalised into a group for ease of calculations and what-not, you have to allow you to be you.

How you respond to lifting weights, how you enjoy (or don't) the gym or strength training, and every other thing you can think of - there is a lot of shaping that's already done. Not that you cannot re-shape yourself. But the point is there is a reason you are different.

Celebrate it! Enjoy it.

To sincerely accept others as they are, we must begin with ourselves. If we cannot accept ourselves as we are, we will never be able to accept others.– Thich Nhat Hanh

I'm not sure there is a more misunderstood word than "fit", especially when used in "fitness". But every jigsaw puzzle teaches us the true meaning: Its pieces fit!The original term "fit" comes from the Old Nordic, "to knit". For me, that's the crucial point of why we eat a certain way, workout and sleep seriously....I've always considered a "fit" person to be one who can balance a working life with being a wonderful neighbour and family member... and still have time to eat properly and keep an appropriate bodyfat percentage.If your kids hate you, your dog runs when you walk in the door, yet you maintain a six-pack ab wall, great for you. I'm not sure I can include you in my definition of "fit"....Be fit to do the tasks of life for as long as you can. Be knitted.– Dan John, from Attempts

And that’s it from me for this week. I’ll see you in Feb!

Here are the 3 pieces for today.

* Digging deeper into conditioning and stamina. Let’s look at a few mental models which will help you unlock your training.

* How can we look at the past and learn? And not just use it to whip ourselves?

* Just do your best. And remember, that changes all the time.

Thought for the week

The most precious and important things in life are, by definition, nontransactional. And to try to bargain for them is to immediately destroy them. You cannot conspire for happiness; it is impossible. But this is often what people try to do, especially when they seek out self-help and other personal development advice - they are essentially saying, "Show me the rules of the game I have to play, and I'll play it," not realising that it's the very fact that they think there are rules to happiness that is preventing them from being happy.– Mark Manson, Everything is Fucked

The end of a melody is not its goal: but nonetheless, had the melody not reached its end it would not have reached its goal either.– Nietzsche

And from me

Being lost in the past versus introspecting the past with your foot firmly in the present.

Our memories, our regrets, our stumbles, those stupid things we said that we wish we could shove back into our mouths - they keep replaying in our heads. Randomly. Suddenly. Pops out of nowhere and leaves you feeling like s**t. There's absolutely zero learning or zero growing from that experience. Just a pile of s**t.

But something magical seems to happen when we don't get lost in them. Instead, when we stay firmly grounded in the present, perspective changes. Learnings happen. And it feels good. There's something positive from that negative experience. There's something beautiful that emerges from that failure.

Maybe, eventually, we can finally get rid of that bad film that keeps replaying, and replace it with something prettier.

Just do your best

Good days and bad days

At the gym, some days you just wanna rip the weight off the floor and do crazy s**t with it. The bell just flies up. You feel invincible. On these days, pressing the 32 kg bell (half my bodyweight) requires minimal to zero warmup, no need to amp myself up or any such thing. I just need a few seconds of focus and punch it up.

And there are some days when the bell feels oh-so-heavy, and you are sluggish and the warmup feels like a workout itself. On these days, even pressing a 24 kg bell feels like work. Only after a reasonable amount of mobilisation work and warmup do I feel greased and even then, it feels (when I compare it to the first instance) like I did half the work.

Controllable

You cannot control this. There are just way too many days, with their own stories and intricacies and uncontrollables and beers and cakes and work stress and all that. What you do control is showing up to the gym.

And what you control once you are there is doing your best. Not checking a box, not lounging in the corner, not checking your phone half the time, mentally checked out and physically too.

The best day is not equal to the best day ever

But you confuse pressing the 32 kg with your best and pressing the 24 kg with sub-par. And therein lies the problem.

Do your best. For that day. It might mean working with a 32 kg bell. It might mean setting a Personal Record (PR). Or it might mean working with a 16 kg bell. Or it might mean going on a walk, or doing Surya Namaskaram only, and skipping the weight training.

Your best is NOT about quantity. Your best is not about output.

In fact, your best on a not-so-great day might not even be high on quality. Some days, your body just takes over. You go based on feel, and you are graceful and fluid. Some days, it feels like you have 3 left feet and one hand.

What do you do? Simple. You do your best.

Drained vs recharged

This doesn't mean shitty reps. Your best, even though it might be lower quality than your bestest best, is still you being disciplined to be present and lift to the best of your abilities on that day.

Your best definitely means showing up.

Your best means you are non-judgmental about it. On a great day as well. Oh, you can certainly celebrate the good things, but stop critiquing yourself. Instead, just watch, learn, and chalk it down as a lesson for another day.

This is a lesson I've learned the hard way at the gym.

Previously, my attitude would be to beat myself up for not being at my peak. Blaming the previous night's activities or whatever.

I'd also try to hit those numbers regardless of how I am feeling physically or mentally. All of this left me even more drained than ever. My training session which was meant to recharge me left me more drained.

Taking it out of the gym and into the rest of the day

Some days are low energy days. Some days, the grumpy goose is up. Some days, the sun is shining inside your head.

What you can do is simple - just do your best.

Instead of trying to define your best for that day as "the best ever", do your best for that day - in that context, in those constraints.

Instead of being judgmental and annoyed at yourself, drop it. It is not about output, and it is not about matching the PR. Not every day can be a PR day.

But every day, you can hit your best for that day.

It is an attitude.

Just do your best. For today.

Tomorrow is another day.

Learning this lesson at the gym took me a few years, and with more awareness, I've had a lot more recharge sessions than draining sessions. Applying this lesson to the larger field of life is something I struggle with. But the lesson is right and works for me. The rest is simple - action. And by that, I mean, I need to do my best.

Understanding stamina with a few mental models

What is endurance work?

Endurance work or cardio or conditioning, I'll use them a bit interchangeably. What are we referring to when we say those words? Strength is simple - can you lift this much? Is your body capable of producing this much force to move the largest possible load?

Conditioning is asking the question of whether you can meet the energy demands of that activity.

The activities range from running 100 metres (as fast as you can) to running a marathon (again, the goal is to run it as fast as you can but with a distance upwards of 40k, we worry much lesser about that and focus on simply completing the task.) Cricket has different energy demands, football has different ones, badminton, boxing - all sports and activities have different requirements and demands.

Intervals and steady-state

Cricket, while batting, requires you to be balanced, steady, mentally focused, and capable of executing a powerful stroke in the gap between the ball releasing and you striking it 20 metres away. And then, the requirement to sprint between the wickets. While bowling (assuming a pace bowler), you have to sprint (at least) 6 times produce an explosive jump and slingshot the ball at a ferocious pace (with accuracy).

If you think about it, these are intervals. You have one sprint, one jump, one slingshot (all chained together) and then 30-odd seconds of recovery before you have to deliver the next ball.

In running, the energy demands are steady-state. You are running at a near-constant rate, rather than the previous example of a sprint (or a peak) followed by rest and recovery.

How long is the work, and how long is the rest? That's pretty much what determines intervals. The more max effort, the longer the rest. That's why a 100-metre sprint, while only 100 metres, will take a lot out of you (if you know to sprint.)

In football, there are bursts of sprinting, slowing down, cutting and turning, walking - the intervals are constantly changing and there's a steady-state aspect of it built-in as well.

Production and Utilisation

Let's use some metaphors and dig a little deeper. And remember, metaphors and mental models are inaccurate i.e. do not take them literally.

Broadly speaking, there are two parts to conditioning - production and utilisation. Let's take a car. To drive this car from point A to point B, what factors does it depend on?

* What's the size of the engine i.e. how much power is it capable of producing?

* What's the size of the fuel tank i.e. how many litres of fuel does it hold?

* What's the fuel efficiency i.e. does it give 5 kmpl or 25 kmpl?

* How good is the onboard computer i.e. is the software pretty good in how it makes all the parts work together?

* How good are the individual parts themselves i.e. are the tyres great and are the gears in solid condition, nothing leaking or being inefficient or needs servicing?

All of these are factors in your conditioning.

Size of the engine

Your strength plays a role in how much force and power you can produce.

The bigger the engine, the more power it can produce.

That does not mean you want the biggest possible engine. You need to figure out what the right engine size is for you. Do you want a 50 kg squat? Or a 100 kg squat? Or a 10 kg squat?

The fuel tank

The fuel of the body is something called ATP, which we won't get into. But similar to petrol/diesel, your body needs to produce ATP, and supply the ATP to ensure continued activity. When we run out of fuel (we don't really, but it is simpler to stick to that being the case) we find ourselves stopping. Say you are walking up 50 flights of stairs - after a while, the legs start to burn, the breathing gets erratic, and you pause to rest. The engine has overheated of sorts and needs to cool down. The rate of energy demand has exceeded the supply, and so we stop output for a bit and let it catch up. As we start doing activities and use up fuel, our body gets better at upping the fuel stores. Similar to the size of the engine growing as we build strength, our fuel tank grows as we keep activity consistent.

Fuel efficiency

Efficiency is about how much work you can do with the least possible fuel. How gracefully you move, how efficient your heart rate and aerobic system is are all factors for fuel-efficiency. The more graceful you are, the more efficient, and the less energy you waste in a movement. Think about your heart rate similar to the RPM.

And your aerobic system is one of the three energy systems in the body - the ones that keep creating new fuel in the presence of oxygen. When you are walking, you are breathing nice and deep and slow. And you can keep walking for a significant amount of time without feeling tired. Because your fuel is constantly replenished. But when we sprint (an anaerobic activity i.e. think of it like NOS from the Fast and the Furious movies), we use up the fuel much faster. And replenishing it takes time. That's what interval training is - use up fuel and then build it up again during the recovery period.

The computer

The onboard computer is your brain. It does what it does and as you know, the software can always be improved. By focused learning and application, not dissimilar to any other skill you've acquired over the years.

The parts themselves

The individual parts require care. If you have a rusted gasket (whatever a gasket is),  things go south. If you have a leaky cylinder or fuel tank, you can see how issues crop up sooner, rather than later. Similarly, if you have an injury on one leg, or if your glutes don't fire, or your pillar is not stable - you are doing the equivalent of what a car looks like from the outside with a tyre punctured, the machinery grating inside etc

How do we improve our conditioning?

As you can see, there are multiple ways to improve our conditioning. And to be clear, I've barely scratched the surface of energy systems, how each one needs to be manipulated differently, the various protocols that are possible. Because it is unnecessary at the start. By starting at the start, what we can do are

* Get stronger. Increase the size of the engine to your Goldilocks zone.

* Do intervals and steady-state training. Intervals allow for near-infinite possibilities. For example, 10 seconds of work followed by 60 seconds of rest to 3 minutes of work followed by 90 seconds of rest and everything in between allows multiple methods. Steady-state does not only mean "run for an hour". Anywhere from 10 minutes to 90 minutes will challenge you differently. You will be producing output at a different rate across all of these timeframes.

* Work on your breathing. In fact, breathe through your nose as much as possible while doing steady-state training.

* Use a heart-rate monitor or utilise the talk test. If you use a monitor, waiting until it comes down to 120 bpm is a great place to start before you start the next bit of work. The talk test is simple - speak out loud a sentence (10-20 words) and when you can say it normally and not with gasps or holding your breath or whatever - you are recovered and ready to go.

* Work on your mobility and flexibility. Be pain-free. Ensure your joints are moving well, there are no compensations. This is much harder than you think. Yoga is a good start.

* The onboard computer improves with mindful training. Listen to your body, don't go overboard and just do your best.

Benchmarks

* Your resting heart rate. Measure it for the next 7 days. Keep the average. Do this every month (most wearables will do this daily for you and save you the trouble)

* 10-minute run. Measure the distance. If you improve this, whatever you are doing is improving your conditioning.

* A benchmark based on your activity of choice. If you are a fast bowler, then 6-8 repeated sprints is a great benchmark.

I hope this post enlarged your thinking about cardio, stamina and conditioning. While this was not a thorough review or even a step-by-step one, I believe that a better mental model about how things work and why will help you figure things out. And that's what I've aimed to do here.

If you have any questions or if I have confused you and you'd like me to clarify, do write to me.

And that’s it for this week. I’ll see you next Sunday. Chill until then.

2022 is here and all that. My last post did abysmally, as apparently none of you give a rat’s ass enough to respond :) But that’s okay. It allows me to continue making s**t up and going along.

So, for this year, I thought I’d take one more baby step and tweak my “3 quotes” and reduce the quotes by one and add a thought of mine in there instead.

I would also like to continue making this a bit more interactive. Maybe not every week but whenever the post lends itself. My first post today, Above the line, is one such post.

So, let’s get to it, shall we?

* Above the line. My attempt to define a simple framework/compass. Rather than being strict with outcomes, allowing a lot more exploration and space to continue moving forward.

* The point of the ride. Training is my sandbox for life. I learn quite a lot from it. I routinely forget it. And so I write things down to remember them better. 5 truths as I know it today.

* 2 quotes and a thought. Better choices today means more choices tomorrow. Duh.

Above the line

Objectivity

Goals, benchmarks and numbers are all great. They work rather well for personal goals, for business stuff and whatever else. With an objective target, everything becomes simple.

You either did it, or you did not.

And therein lies the problem.

What if you did not set the right goal? What if you said you were going to lose 20 kilos but lost only 18? If you are anything like me (and unfortunately, I've realised I am not unique in this situation), you are gonna chalk it down as a failure. And categorise you as a slacker or whatever. You will lack the outsider perspective for what a frickin' amazing job you did by losing a godawful amount of weight.

Journaling

For the past year and some, I've been good with a new habit of mine - journaling. I write down answers to a few prompts and reflect on them, and use them as a feed-forward loop into the next month.

And what I realised was I was doing the same thing. I was setting pretty good (and not random) goals but along the way, I'd realise that they were off or sometimes conflicted with one another.

While I spout sensible stuff here and say one needs the outsider perspective especially on oneself, I am as much at fault as the next person. So, how about a better framework?

Drawing a line

So, here's my attempt. Drawing a line. I am either above the line, or below the line. If I am above the line, it is a win. If I am below the line, well, three guesses.

Yes, this gets rather black or white. But it is an improvement to "I will lose 20 kilos or cry". Let's use a couple of examples - one for strength, and one for fat loss.

Your strength goal might be to be able to lift an arbitrary amount of weight. For a serious lifter, this is a no-brainer. You go into a training plan with a goal to lift a certain amount by a certain timeframe. But what matters more is showing up. And if you show up and with positive intent, good things happen. So, instead of having a goal of "I will squat 100 kilos for 5 reps", how about you set your line differently?

Coz does it matter what you squat? Not at all. There are a zillion people who can squat more and squat better. Or you go to a small enough pond, you are the best squatter. Completely irrelevant - what one squats.

And for nutrition, instead of living and dying based on a few hundred grams, how about this?

It is not fully defined - to allow a lot of leeway but also enough clarity about what you will not be doing. One month could simply be about chewing more. Another month could be about reducing the rice you eat and increasing the veggies on your plate.

Your turn

If this strikes a chord, give it a shot. Reading is one thing. Acting on it, even what might be a sub-par method could lead you into a better truth for yourself.

How about you define what's above the line and below the line for you - one for your activity/fitness, and one for your nutrition/health?

I’ve had 2 people share theirs with me and it has improved my understanding of what I’ve written - as all interpretations and reinterpretations go into making it.

If you attempt this and would like to share it, I’d love to read it.

The point of the ride aka A few simple truths

Every direction is south

Lifting weights, running, and physical activity started off as a means to an end. I wanted to not look and feel like how I did - simple as that. "Not be here" was a good starting goal.

When you are at the North Pole, every direction is south.

That made it simple and easy - anything I did would help me to move in the right direction. Eat one less candy bar a day. Drink one less can of soda pop a day. Eat half a cup of vegetables more per day. Stretch for 15 minutes. Literally, any frickin' thing.

Truth #1: What one needs to do is to not over-think and just do.

Disneyland

Once I got out of the North Pole (or the bottom, or whatever you wanna term it) I realised that there was a large playground. So many options. But it is akin to going to Disneyland - there are so many rides and you wanna go on them all at once. That it gets confusing and overwhelming.

You do not need to get on all the rides today. You can keep coming back to Disneyland every year.

Truth #2: Pick a ride or two and enjoy them for a bit. Before moving on to the next ride.

The point of the ride

I looked at everything as a means to an end. But that's a side effect. A nice-to-have. When you ride Space Mountain, you are going on an amazing few minutes that leaves you exhilarated. And right back where you started. Filled with joy and wonder.

Truth #3: The point of the ride is the ride. You get joy from the anticipation, and from the ride itself. If you let it, it will leave you changed.

Results

But what about results? You cannot keep going on joyrides all the time. You need to get on a ride that goes from here to there.

Well, do you? As a coach who is required to deliver results, I cannot shy away from this requirement. What I need to do, for myself and for my students, is to keep my eyes open for all the amazing things that happen as we get to our goals. And the sucky things as well - coz as Coach Dan John rightly reminds us, what did you lose to win this goal?

Truth #4: The results are one part of what you got on the ride. Not the only part.

More than yesterday

There are a lot more truths and learnings that I have not had the discipline or vision to unpack. Even the ones I've unpacked, I still struggle to apply them in my training. Applying those learnings outside the gym is even harder.

Writing has helped. It is a note to self. It is a time to unpack, to reflect. And to feed forward into a tweaked ritual at the gym, and maybe in life.

Truth #5: I know very little. But (I think) I know more than yesterday.

And I could very well be completely wrong about all of this. But for today, they will suffice as a map. And using this map, I can re-draw my next map.

Friday thought, and 2 quotes

Small change to the format. Instead of 3 quotes, I am going to go out on a limb and share a thought of mine. And not be limited by being unable to make it a punchy quote.

You don't even notice what you notice,because nothing in your education has taught you that what you notice is important.– Verlyn Klinkenborg

Why don't we do things we know we should do?Because we don't feel like it.Every problem of self-control is not a problem of information or discipline or reason but, rather, of emotion.– Mark Manson

Better choices today means more choices in the future.Poorer choices today means lesser choices in the future.Choose to eat better, explore your body and mind, and it means a lot more choices in the future. Tomorrow and in a bunch of years from now.

Eating better does not mean you have to never indulge. Or never sniff another drink.

Exploring your body and mind most definitely does not mean subjecting yourself to physical activity that does not grow your body and mind.

There are a lot of ways to go about doing this fitness and nutrition thing. The only wrong way is choosing not to do something about it.

And that’s it. The first edition for 2022 is done and dusted. I’ll see you here next Sunday.

On to the 3 things for today.

* The metaphor of big rocks and pebbles and how if you go the big rocks, followed by pebbles, and followed by sand we can get to do everything. But if we go the other way around i.e. sand first, we cannot fit our big rocks in. Fair enough. But what if there’s a glitch in that metaphor itself?

* 3 quotes for this week. Featuring Steven Pressfield, Pema Chodron, Shunryu Suzuki.

* How much should you work yourself out? Sounds simple but this takes a bit of skill for us to figure it out for ourselves.

Let’s get started.

Big Rocks, Pebbles, Sand: 2.0

You've heard the metaphor/story of the big rocks, pebbles and sand, right? Here's a quick recap. If you put the sand in first, you won't have space for the pebbles and the rocks. But if you put in the big rocks first, then the pebbles, and then the sand - what a miracle! You have space for all of it.

The metaphor is that the big rocks are the important things in your life, the pebbles are the slightly-less important ones, while the sand is the fluff in our lives.

As a kid, when I came across this story, my mind was blown. Here is prioritisation and time management put across so well. Even a non-planner like me could understand and execute.

Now, when I look at this story, I realise how wonderfully flawed it is. With the experience of running a company for 10+ years and being much older, I'd like to poke a couple of holes.

The metaphor definitely has its heart in the right place. It teaches you that you need to prioritise.

But its fundamental flaw is in fooling you that you can fit everything in. And in telling you that you should aim for that.

You cannot. You should not.

F**k this hustle culture. F**k this I'll sleep when I am dead.

I definitely do not have a grasp on my life so perfectly, or with my priorities, or with my stress levels and everything all of us battle with. But after years of trying various techniques and hacks and all that, I have learned to listen to my gut. I might not know the right answer. But staying away from the wrong one seems like a good place to find it.

The challenge is not to fit in the pieces of your life so that you find the exact arrangement where they all fit in precisely.

The challenge is to figure out which big rocks you want, and which big rocks you opt-out from.

If there's no slack, if there's no space, if there's no emptiness between things - you won't allow for any growth or blossoming. You won't have any space to breathe.

Saying no to things you dislike is easy. Saying no to things you like - now, that's what you got to do. Which big rocks (and pebbles) do you keep aside?

3 quotes for this week

Act, reflect. Act, reflect.NEVER act and reflect at the same time.– Steven Pressfield; Do the Work

My favourite slap-in-the-face author. If you are stuck in a rut, not making progress in a project - buy The War of Art or Do the Work. Do it now!

Communication.Without any intentional, fancy way of adjusting yourself, to express yourself as you are is the most important thing.– Shunryu Suzuki; Zen Mind, Beginners, Mind

Any time I find it hard to pull the trigger and publish a post, like this one or this one, I think about this post. Just be me. Easier said than done. And I hit publish.

In a nontheistic state of mind, abandoning hope is an affirmation, the beginning of the beginning. You could even put “Abandon hope” on your refrigerator door instead of more conventional aspirations like “Every day in every way I’m getting better and better.”Hope and fear come from feeling that we lack something; they come from a sense of poverty. We can’t simply relax with ourselves. We hold on to hope, and hope robs us of the present moment. We feel that someone else knows what’s going on, but that there’s something missing in us, and therefore something is lacking in our world.– Pema Chodron; When Things Fall Apart

This sounds contrarian at first. Then, you realise the profundity of it.

The truth is no one knows what's going on and all of us are winging it. Some pretend well, some don't. Some are scoring a lot of points while winging it and that makes us assume they are experts.

How hard should you work out?

Unable to finish a warmup

When you start training, when you start close to the bottom, your levels of fitness are low. Obviously. You might find it hard to get through a warmup or run 500 metres. Slowly, you build yourself up and get to a place where you have the energy to finish a workout strong. You finish a run and you don't feel like your legs resemble jelly.

Energetic throughout the day

At this stage, your fitness levels have improved exponentially from where you started. But your skill levels are still rather inadequate. Let's say a few months back, you could barely lift 10 kilos but today you are able to lift 20 kilos - that's a 100% improvement.

You feel empowered. Every workout you go to, you want to work yourself out. Coz you actually have the mental gear today which you didn't have a few weeks ago. And it feels good to push your body, to sweat it out. You feel this is a necessary part of the metamorphosis of becoming the new you.

You feel energetic throughout the day. In fact, if you don't get your workout in, you feel a bit sluggish the rest of the day.

Starting to get sluggish

But as you continue working yourself out, it stops feeling good after a few weeks. Your improvement slows down. Your energy levels drop during the day.

Do you work yourself harder? Or do you work yourself smarter?

Enter the concept of RPE or Rate of Perceived Exertion.

The Borg Rating of Perceived Exertion (RPE) is a way of measuring physical activity intensity level. Perceived exertion is how hard you feel like your body is working. It is based on the physical sensations a person experiences during physical activity, including increased heart rate, increased respiration or breathing rate, increased sweating, and muscle fatigue. Although this is a subjective measure, your exertion rating based on a 6 to 20 rating scale, may provide a fairly good estimate of your actual heart rate during physical activity (Borg, 1998).

Let's break it down

RPE is a subjective measure i.e. it is not objective. It is based on you. If you and I do the same amount of work, it does NOT mean we worked at the same RPE. Unless we have identical fitness levels. I could be at a 15/20 after running 1 kilometre while you are at a 12/20 on the Borg RPE scale.

There are various versions of this RPE scale. Let's simplify it for our benefit and look at it as a simple scale of 1 - 10, where 1 is akin to a relaxed walk and 10 is the maximal effort you are capable of (let's say Usain Bolt's world record-setting sprint.)

Let's go back to the previous examples. When you do a 10-minute warmup but find yourself unable to finish it coz your heart is in your mouth, that's a rather high RPE, say 9/10. Two months later, when you breeze through the warmup and are feeling ready to get into your workout after it, the same warmup is probably 6/10.

When I attempted to run 500 metres and felt unable to move coz my heart was hammering away and I couldn't draw a proper breath, my RPE was 9/10. One month later, running 500 metres felt like a 5/10. This doesn't mean every time I attempt to run 500m, it is a 5/10. Let's say I have the flu and I am recovering but not 100% and I attempt the 500m run. It might feel like an 8/10. Two days later, once I am fully recovered, it might be back at a 5/10.

How can you use this?

Remember, the scale is subjective and that's where its power is. It is subjective to you and how you feel and your fitness levels.

If you can train around an 8/10 every time you go to the gym, you are ahead of most people.

The point is not to attempt a 10/10 every single session.

There can and should definitely be recovery sessions that are much less on the RPE scale.

8/10 every day does not mean you keep lifting the same weights for the same reps daily. It does not mean you run the same distance at the same time. You can. But that's not the only method.

Let's use two different examples.

Example 1: Lifting weights

Let's say you can squat the 32 kg kettlebell for 5 reps and you absolutely cannot do it for a sixth rep. So, on the squat, 32 kg x 1 x 5 (lifting 32 kg bell for 1 set of 5 reps) is a 10/10 (or a 9/10, coz you probably can do this again after 10-15 minutes of rest).

So, what would lifting the 24 kg (75% of 32 kg) for 1 set of 5 be? Approximately 7/10.

And 16 kg for 1 set of 5 would approximately be 50%.

Using the typical light-medium-heavy model of lifting, here's how you can break it down. In this model, you lift heavy one day of the week, you go medium one day of the week and you have one light day. But can we be at 80% on all 3 days?

That could mean

* 32 kg x 1 x 4 reps. 4/5 = 80%, and so leaving 1 rep in the tank will mean we worked hard but are not draining the tank.

* 24 kg x 1 x 10 reps could be 80%. Or for 3 sets of 8.

* 16 kg for 3 sets of 15 or 5 sets of 10, for example, could be 80%.

So, even though your load is at 50%, you've changed the volume to adjust the amount of work you did to get the RPE to 80% for all 3 days.

You put in a solid amount of effort in each training session.

Now, why wouldn't you just lift the 32 kg every session? Coz you can put a lot more quality and improve technique when you lift the 16 kg. Amongst other things. We'll not dive deeper than this.

Example 2: Running

Let's say you can run a 5k in 50 minutes, and this is your 9/10.

So, you could break this down as

* running 5k in 55ish minutes is an 8/10 effort.

* running 2.5k in 25 minutes

* running 1k in 9 minutes, resting 5 minutes and repeating this.

You can see that there are many ways to skin the same thing and still put in a solid amount of effort.

Is 50% a waste of time?

Not at all. We need recovery sessions. There is definitely a time and space for all of these. If you are feeling burnt out a bit, physically or mentally, then pulling the RPE down for a few sessions or just working on your recovery will help you find it back. Think of it as getting the flu - you aren't gonna try to work at the same intensity with the flu as you would when you are feeling good.

In fact, plugging in the adequate number of recovery sessions is one of the biggest gaps in most people's training. Including my own.

Why 8/10

It is a solid amount of effort without draining the tank.

It is repeatable.

It leaves you wanting to do more.

It stresses your body enough and allows the process of recovering and getting stronger to kick in.

Do you never do a 10/10?

Of course, you must push yourself to a 9/10 and a 10/10. Occasionally. In lifting, your training cycle will lead to a session or a couple where you are approaching your previous maximum and you will lift a weight you've not lifted before. These are rather exciting times and well-deserved. But you should not be trying to do this in every session.

In our previous example, 4 weeks of squatting at 80% but using the 32 kg, the 24 kg, and the 16 kg, you decide to see what the most you can squat today is. You pick up the 32 kg and keep cranking out reps. And you are able to do 15.

So, 32 x 1 x 15 is your 9/10 now.

Or let's say you kept trying to lift more weight and you did the 40 kg for 7 and then the 48 kg for 5, 48 x 1 x 5 is your 9/10.

And you can recalibrate 80% of the other 3 days with the new benchmark you've set.

But when we aim for a 10/10 every single day, well, that's like asking Usain Bolt to run a sub-9.6-second 100-metre sprint daily. Not possible. And if it is not possible for Bolt, why do you think it makes sense for you?

Go home feeling stronger than you came in

As a simple rule of thumb, if you can work hard enough but always go home feeling stronger than you came in, you will keep making progress.

You have to do enough work to challenge yourself. But you have to gauge it just right so that you didn't go too much out of your comfort zone that it is gonna impair the rest of the day or the next training session.

It sounds complicated. And it is. But as you get used to training, to going based on how you feel, using your benchmarks, and utilising tools like a heart rate monitor etc, you get good at it.

So, how hard should you work out?

It depends.

You can go light or heavy but aim to work hard.

But not too hard.

Occasionally, push your limits. Once a month or a couple of times a quarter.

Occasionally, ease up.

Don't work yourself out all the time.

Don't sit in your comfort zone all the time.

Go home feeling stronger than you came in.

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed a post, please do share it with a friend.

You wrote down all your goals for 2022 already, right? Of course, you did, being a loyal reader. Now, time to do a 2nd draft. Yes, seriously. Mull it over some more.

I love writing ideas at different points of time during the day. When I write them down, irrespective of my level of awake-ness or weirdness, I think they are always pure genius. When I read them the next morning, some of them give me the same feeling I get when trying to read a doctor’s prescription, a good chunk of others feel like a 5-year old writing stuff down, and occasionally one makes sense and resemble an adult writing it. The last bit is what you mostly end up reading, although occasionally I indulge and publish the gibberish.

That brings me to today. The 3 things I have for you are

* on the joy of, and dealing with contradictions. Or how you can eat doughnuts and still lose weight.

* 3 quotes. Including “Never forget that the public you is not you.”

* on choosing experiences. In the not-too-distant future, whatever you eat is engineered to taste like your favourite food but is made up of the exact concoction of macro and micro-nutrients you need to help you thrive physically and mentally.

Let’s do this!

The joy of contradictions

In the world of fitness and nutrition, you have to be comfortable in dealing with contradictions. You have to learn to dig deeper, probe and ask the right question. The issue is that most often, you don't know enough to ask the right question. You learn that only along the way. You realise that you are doing the wrong thing only when you've done the wrong thing enough times. That's how it is, and that's okay.

Here are a couple of contradictions.

All diets work. None of them works.

You can eat doughnuts and burgers and lose weight. All you have to do is ensure that you are on a calorie deficit. You'll find a lot of stunts on the internet proving this.

Let's say you need to eat 1200 calories. That's not a lot of doughnuts and pizza. That's the issue. But if you can suck it up and deal with it, great. Do it for a month and you will lose weight. Crazy!

Of course, you can eat 1200 calories of vegetables and you will lose weight as well. Most probably the quality of weight loss is higher, your health is better and all that. But what is the problem you are trying to solve? If you want to have your cake and lose weight too, just eat the requisite calories of cake and nothing else, and you can do it.

Of course, doing these are hard. There's not enough pizza to go around when it is 1200 calories/day. And eating 1200 calories of vegetables-only is so hard and so boring. Ughhh.

If you do it, you will lose weight. Yaay, all nonsensical stupid diets work.

If you don't do it, you won't lose weight. Even the best diet in the world won't.

Zero means zero. Zero doesn't mean zero.

Sometimes, you have to flip a switch. No sugar means no sugar.

Sometimes, you have to figure out sustainability. A square of dark chocolate, a weekly ice cream, a beer with friends - a few things in moderation is the way to go.

You have to work yourself out. You have to leave enough in the tank at the end of the session.

Lying down in a pool of your sweat feels good. You killed that session. You worked out hard and the dopamine rush feels amazing.

This is definitely okay. But occasionally.

Most of the time, you want to leave the gym feeling stronger than you came in. That means you pushed your upper limit just a wee bit. You could've lifted more but you didn't. Coz you have a life to get back to. Coz you have 1000 more training sessions.

Contradictions

Life is full of contradictions. Well, at least, fitness and nutrition are filled with it.

Sometimes, you have to do this. Sometimes, you have to do that.

The time window with which you are looking at things is a crucial factor.

If you want to lose weight in 4 weeks, and to heck with the consequences and the difficulties and all that - then this is not a time for moderation.

But if you want to keep getting stronger year after year, stay in shape for the long-term, you have to find the right balance between unsustainable behaviour (little spurts of it) with sustainable, sensible behaviour (long stretches of it).

That's how it is.

You can try to prove me wrong. But I wish I made all of this up and it was my theory. Nah, all of this is handed down to me by giants. I am just spreading the word.

Or you can reach deep down to the sensible person who you shut up when they keep saying reasonable things.

Remember, just solve the maze from the end. And then repeat the steps on the way forward.

3 quotes

Public comments are just feedback on something you made. They're worth reading to see how this thing has been perceived. You can even take it as feedback on the public image you've created. All people know is what you've chosen to show them. So if your public persona is coming across wrong, try tweaking it.Never forget that the public you is not you.– Derek Sivers

All of us have a private persona. People who see me as a coach, for example, see me at my best. I am sharp, I am alert and awake, I am prepared, and I am good at what I do. So, they have a rather altered sense of who I am. Likewise, in other facets of my life, I am perceived differently.

Everyone around you sees you only through a rather small window and through their lens. So, take what they say with that in mind.

And the people who are much further out, who don't even know you through that window - how much attention should you be paying them?

We're the sum of our behaviours. Ninety percent of our actions are driven by habits, whether positive or negative. Who we are today physically, emotionally, mentally, professionally, and financially is a reflection of our behaviours and the choices we've made to this point.– Mark Verstagen

The best part is everything about your behaviours and actions and habits are under your control. If you don't like where you are, you can fix it.

One step forward at a time.

The body is one piece.– Dan John / John Jerome

It just is. This statement is simple and obvious and profound.

On choosing experiences.

Black Mirror time.

Living in the future

In the not-too-far away future, there will be dramatic differences. 100 years ago, automobiles and planes were abnormalities. Today, flying across the world in less than half a day for a week for a vacation or work trip has become commonplace. Door-to-door, it takes me the same amount of time to visit my family in the village near Thanjavur as it takes to go to my friend's house in Singapore. That's ridiculous!

With the metaverse and virtual reality and all that jazz, you could choose to have coffee in Blue Bottle in SF in the morning, go to your favourite dive bar in New York in the evening, and watch football in the Bernabeu - all from your home, and all in the course of your day. And not as a poor substitute but as the real thing. While this may sound incredulous, pause for a second and think. We can fly across the world in metal tubes!

Always in great shape

And you are always in great physical shape. Whatever you eat is engineered to taste like your favourite food but is made up of the exact concoction of macro and micro-nutrients you need to help you thrive physically and mentally.

Feel like pasta? Done! Experience lunch with your spouse in your favourite restaurant in Tuscany with a carafe of house red. Your tongue and brain will still taste stuff the same way, coz they are chemical reactions and programs. But what actually drips into you is the precise ratio of the highest quality nutrients. You get the taste and experience, your body gets none of the nonsense. Win-win!

You have a patch on you that wakes you up slowly in the morning, along with light sensors in your bedroom. And gets you into relaxation mode and ready for bed in the night. You can still drink coffee or whatever feels like coffee but it is decoupled with the delayed chemical reactions you need. You don't need to dunk 3 espressos after lunch to stop feeling drowsy or have an energy drink at 9 pm to pull an all-nighter. All solved with the best biochemical programs, tailored for you.

Every experience becomes a choice

Some of you detest the gym. Some of you cannot stand the thought of going on a diet. But you do it sooner or later coz you want the outcomes of those choices.

But these kinda things will soon be decoupled. You choose to do what you want. Don't like lifting weights or running or any such thing - no problem. You will still be in great physical shape. You can have ice cream for breakfast and pizza for lunch and beer for dinner and still be ripped.

Every experience becomes a choice. You choose to go lift weights because you enjoy it. You do it with your training buddies coz that's how you hang out. Some of you like hanging out with your friends at nightclubs and bars. Some of you like hanging out with your friends on the badminton court.

You get to do things your way, without worrying about the carrot or the stick.

You choose the experience you want to nourish your life with.

A thought exercise

Unfortunately for you and me, this is not going to happen immediately. This scenario, or the equivalent of it, will happen within the next 100 years, probably much earlier.

For now, we are here. But this is a useful thought experiment. What choices are you making today? What experiences are you choosing today? Which ones would you make otherwise if the outcome could be de-coupled? You can hang out with any of your friends, anywhere. Doesn't matter where you are or where they are. Well, who do you choose to hang out with? How do you choose to spend your day? How do you choose to find and make meaning?

And why should this choice change only when the future comes about?

Consequences, of course. Ice cream for breakfast and beer for dinner and sitting on the couch all day is not going to end well. So, what choices will you make given these consequences, given your current reality?

And on the larger choices - who do you choose to spend your time with, how do you choose to spend your day etc - they have the same consequences. The metaverse is not going to solve anything if you make the wrong choices.

In many places, the tech/future will take care of our problems and solve them for us. But for now, you have to do your best.

But in many other places, the choices we make and the lives we lead are tech/future agnostic. What different choices will you make here?

Thanks for reading. If you liked or learned one useful tidbit, please let me know what that was. And of course, I’d hugely appreciate it if you could spread the word to one friend of yours.

See ya next week!

We are 11 months in, and one to go before the end of the year. As we gear up to close out the year and begin a new one, now might be a better time to set some goals and all that for the next year. Rather than in one month.

Why? Well, the same principle as “never go grocery shopping when you are hungry.”

You will be harsh on yourself. You will want to do 27 different things and then not put enough effort into them.

Well, at least, that’s me. And so, I am collating my thoughts when I am sensible to chart out goals for next year. I am going grocery shopping with a clear menu and a full stomach.

On to the 3 things for today,

* Dogs, and being in the moment. As a reader shared their thoughts on this “Do we always have to think about the next moment? 🤔Do we always have to plan for tomorrow? 🤔Do we always have to worry about a rainy day when the sun is shining bright now? 🤔”

* 3 quotes, featuring an excerpt about the lead-pipe theory of the collapse of Rome, and the lead-pipe theory of modern-day humans.

* Solving the maze. Do you remember trying to solve a maze? You start and then you come to a place that forks. You have a choice to make. You make a choice. More forks, more choices. You are deeper into the maze. And then, a dead-end! What do you do, Jack? What do you do?And if you haven’t watched Speed coz you weren’t born when it came out, I don’t know what to say.

Dogs, and being in the moment

Our dog is pretty darn athletic. She's a mutt of some kind. And she has very few modes in her.

When it is time to chill, she's chilling. She chills a lot. She has 17 different spots with various levels of firmness and softness of surface to chill and lounge, based on her mood.

When it is time to play, she's nuts. She is on fire. She sprints and jumps and dashes all over the place, occasionally nipping at our ankles. When she plays with her friends too, the same. Ballistic. And then a brief 10-second breather, and then back at it again. Perfect high-intensity intervals.

When it is time to eat, there are no other thoughts in her head. She gets her chow done and immediately finds a comfortable spot to lounge and chill and keep an eye on us.

And when she wants to be petted, oh boy, is she stubborn and cute!

Dogs live in the moment.

When you are at the gym, lift heavy. And focus on your lifts.

When you are eating, focus on chewing, and eating slowly.

When you are sleeping, put away the darn devices and shut up and sleep.

Keep your mind on the thing you are doing. It is that simple.

I struggle with this. When I am watching a game, I am also pretending to be the coach. When I am training, I am also the world's greatest critic. But when I catch myself and chant my magic words and shut up and focus, the experience is completely changed.

Do it! You know I am right.

3 quotes

The ancient Romans built elaborate networks of pipes to deliver water where they wanted it to go. The networks were a marvel. But many of the pipes were made of lead, and the water carried the lead along with it.One school of thought regards this as part of the reason for the decline and fall of Rome : lead poisoning gradually took its toll, impairing the thought and judgment of many Romans, especially at the top.The theory is much disputed; perhaps it contains no truth. But as a metaphor it is irresistible.We have built networks for the delivery of information – the internet, and especially social media. These networks, too, are a marvel. But they also carry a kind of poison with them.The mind fed from those sources learns to subsist happily on quick reactions, easy certainties, one-liners, and rage. It craves confirmation and resents contradiction. Attention spans collapse; imbecility propagates, then seems normal, then is celebrated. The capacity for rational discourse between people who disagree gradually rots.I have a good deal more confidence in the lead-pipe theory of the internet, and its effect on our culture, than in the lead-pipe theory of the fall of Rome.– Ward Farnsworth, from The Socratic Method

Yes, I know that's a long one (the extra line breaks are me, not in the original. I did that to aid reading). But I loved the metaphor and had to put it over here as food for thought.

While a lead-pipe will always carry lead, how we use the lead-pipe of social media is up to us.

"Do you have a favourite saying?" asked the boy."Yes" said the mole."What is it?""If at first you don't succeed, have some cake.""I see, does it work?""Every time."– Charlie Mackesy, from The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse

I adore this book. It is a great book for kids, I think. It is definitely a great book for adults.

Experiencing is believing – A fat belly cannot believe that such a thing as hunger exists.– Bruce Lee

Get into a plank. Now, get your right foot just outside your right palm. We call this a groiner. I always thought the sole purpose of this move was to help open up the back hip. Until I got injured and could not walk or move for a month. And then when I tried to do this, I realised I couldn't bring my right foot outside my right palm. Ahhh, so these are all the muscles we are using. It was a light-bulb moment for me and one that heavily impacted my (future) coaching as I realised what a student goes through when they start off.

Solving the maze

Do you remember trying to solve a maze? You know, the ones that come in puzzle books and newspapers? You start and then you come to a place that forks. You have a choice to make. You make a choice and go further into the maze. More forks, more choices. You are deeper into the maze. And then, a dead-end!

What do you do? Simple. You retrace your path to the last fork you took, and make the other choice. If that's a dead-end, same deal. Re-trace to an even earlier choice.

Solving your health and fitness is not your typical "solve it once and you are done" kinda thing. When you decide to work on it, outside help gives you shortcuts and clues but it comes down to you making choices. You need to make choices that work for you. What is a dead-end for your friend might be the breakthrough for you. And vice-versa.

What worked today might not work for you in a few years. Because you are not the same person, and neither are your circumstances.

When you solve a maze, there's immediately the start of a new one - at the centre. At the solution.

The shortcut to solving a maze is to start from the solution and work your way back to the start. You make lesser, if at all any, mistakes and find your way to the goal.

You can apply that metaphor in two ways.

One, visualise yourself at your endpoint. Let's say it is you losing 10 kilos or deadlifting double bodyweight or whatever it is you fancy. What does your current day and week look like? That's the solution to your maze. Now, you need to emulate the steps to your solution until you get to the solution.

Two, you apply your learnings from solving this maze to your next maze. The next one is not more complex, but it could be. It sometimes is, it sometimes is not. But you know how to solve a maze. You know what all it entails - experiments, making choices, learning, going back to a previous fork, and all the time making one step forward in the direction you've chosen.

When you stop trying to solve the problem with finality, things get much simpler.

When you realise this is a never-ending game and love it for that precise nature, you are halfway close to winning.

After solving the current maze, the next maze is the reward, it is the challenge, it is the way of life. Expect it. Look forward to it.

And remember, you will always find yourself at a dead-end, sooner or later. That's fine. Go back to the previous step and make a different choice.

Begin again!

Thanks for reading/listening! I truly appreciate it.

If you enjoy my writing and think it would be useful for someone on their journey, do spread the word to that one person.

I am excited to present the second part of the “Core”. When you understand these metaphors and frame it for you in your head, your lifting and output at the gym will go to the next level! And these will be concepts you will apply and build on for the next few years.

I also wrote a piece about calluses, metaphorically, that seems to be a hit. For reasons, I don’t quite understand. But hey, if it works for you, that’s what really matters.

So, let’s get to it!

* Breathing and Bracing. The conclusion in understanding what we mean by the core, and how to use it for maximal benefit in our training.

* 3 quotes, as usual.

* Calluses and bicycle seats. When you start something new, it is difficult. It chafes. It hurts. It is mighty uncomfortable. But as long as you are persistent, you will get rather good at it. You will adapt to it. You improve. You level up.

I’d hugely appreciate it if you can spread the word and get one of your fitness-minded friends to read my article. Only if you think it is share-worthy, of course. I appreciate you contemplating it.

Calluses and Bicycle Seats

Riding a bicycle will hurt your butt. Swimming will burn your eyes (is chlorine still a thing?). Running might cause cramps.

When you start lifting weights - barbells and kettlebells - the iron bites you. Front squats chafe your neck. Back squats chafe your traps. Swings threaten to rip the skin on your palms. The bell bangs into you when you clean them.

You get better with your skill. And your body gets used to it. Your palms develop calluses, for example. Your hands get rougher and get used to picking up the iron. When the bell bangs into you, you take the bump rather well.

Calluses are a great metaphor.

When you start something new, it is difficult. It chafes. It hurts. It is mighty uncomfortable. But as long as you are persistent, you will get rather good at it. You will adapt to it. You improve. You level up.

You don't lift weights for a few months. And when you go back to it, your hands will feel tender after the first day. But in a few sessions, you will be fine.

Dealing with the discomfort of reading a book above my skill level is something I have more skill today than I did 10 years back. Rather than getting frustrated and throwing it away, I get frustrated and then calm down, and I go again. I do a bit more the next day. And soon, the book resembles English words.

You have successes in other domains - doing the same thing - developing your calluses. Fitness or fat loss is no different. You need to have the same patience and approach, after contextualisation, of course.

3 quotes

We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It's easy to say "It's not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem." Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.– Fred Rogers

A student of mine sent me this quote. I was one of those people who said that it is not my problem. But when I realised I could find fitness and that it was transformational, I simply could not keep it to myself.

With the general trend of health and fitness going south, I do think we need more people to share the responsibility of talking sense and realistic goals and approaches. And skipping scams and fads.

Choose the pain of discipline, not the pain of regret.– Derek Sivers

Simple. Powerful.

Do I put this candy in my mouth now? Or do I repeat this pain of saying "No" for 6 months and have 2 inches lesser around my waist?

Or do I give in, and then 3 months later, b***h and moan about another failed diet and how I just cannot get leaner?

Everything is a choice.

... unbounded growth cannot be sustained without having either infinite resources or inducing major paradigm shifts that "reset" the clock before potential collapse occurs.– Geoffrey West

He is talking about the theory of finite time singularity. Sounds fancy and complex, right. I am going to steal it and talk about more regular stuff.

In most instances, these paradigm shifts are brilliant. But sometimes, we need to know if it is a true paradigm shift. Running away to space to colonise it - is that a true paradigm shift? Killing the Earth and being done with it and going elsewhere to try again? Well, what do you think is gonna happen there, wherever that is? The real paradigm shift would be where we live in ecological balance. In my naive opinion.

Breathing and Bracing: The Core

This is the second part of understanding a fundamental skill in strength and conditioning. The first part is what the core is. You can read the full piece here, or the brief summary is right below.

The core in 5 bullets

The core is a catch-all term we use without much precision. And often, we think we are referring to the area around our abs or something along our midsection. Which is fine - the focus on our trunk or midsection is ideal. Let's call it the pillar instead because core could mean something else (depending on the movement).

* The core's function is to keep your back safe. And to transmit power efficiently.

* The more efficient it is, the better. Else, you are wasting energy creating power but that's dissipating. Think of the power lines that bring electricity to your home.

* Pillar is a better term than the core. The pillar is a 6-sided box. Our pillar is 360 degrees - think of wearing a corset. Plus the bottom. And the top that we are ignoring (for now).

* The limbs move. The pillar provides a stable pathway for the energy to move.

* Think of straps running down vertically and diagonally, from shoulder to hip, all around. Tighten the straps (like a backpack strap being tightened, so that the backpack does not jostle) and hold them there and lift/move.

That's good enough to start. When you lift heavy enough, you will outgrow part of this definition, and add more layers.

Metaphor: A Car Tyre

When your car tyre is flat, there's a leak somewhere. That's why it has gone flat. When you plug the hole and then pump air into it, it fills up nicely and the shape is restored and it feels solid and firm. The ride quality is restored. If you persist in driving around with a flat tyre

* You are damaging the wheel components, the axle and whatever else.

* You cannot drive fast.

* You are in danger of ruining the car over the long term.

* The time and money the car is going to spend in the repair shop is increasing the more you use it.

Likewise, when you do not engage your pillar properly and do not practice breathing and bracing, what do you think happens when you try to lift heavy?

Most people get frustrated by a lack of progress, after the initial phase of lifting. You cannot lift heavier because your pillar cannot support it. Just like trying to drive fast with a flat tyre, you either cannot, or you are going to injure yourself.

Likewise, you cannot perform ballistics i.e. explosive movements. You cannot sprint fast, or throw or jump. Or again, you are inviting injury.

The muscles of our pillar are the rubber of the car tyre.

The air that we fill up at pressure is the air that we inhale and exhale to brace.

Just the muscles alone do not have to do the job. They can but when you add the two components together, you are capable of a lot more.

Tying the pillar together with skill and technique is a journey that you will be on for a long time. Adding in the breathing and bracing as well is a skill you will continue to improve on. And slowly, you will keep improving how much weight you lift (the simplest way to explain output - you might want to run faster, jump higher etc - all are built on the same principle).

The top of the box

We neglected the top of the box in the first part. And by we, I mean me.

How we breathe in is the top of the box. We should be breathing in (almost always) with our noses.

We should be breathing in while our muscles of the pillar are braced. But that might take a while.

We use a muscle called the diaphragm to breathe. Or rather, we should. Most of us have stiff necks because we breathe shallow and use the wrong muscles to breathe.

Lie face down, and breathe so that your belly pushes into the floor. And slowly feel your pillar expand all-around, rather than just into the floor.

That's about it. More here at the start just confuses.

Brace for a punch

Stand up. Poke your bum. Yes, really. Feels squishy, right?

Now, squeeze your glutes as hard as you can. Harder. Now, poke your bum. Solid and firm!

The car tyre when the air is not full or at proper pressure has a lot more give. It is squishy. But when you fill it up, it feels solid. Most of us give the car tyre a kick after filling it up, right?

The full tyre. The solid butt. That's what we need to do as well with our pillar muscles plus the air.

Brace yourself for a punch. Don't push it out in the front. Fill it up like the car tyre fills up. Inhale into your belly and firm up. Your pillar will fill up all around. It will "increase" in size a bit.

Once again, do not push your stomach out.

And definitely do not suck your stomach in.

Poke your abs (and your sides) - it should feel like how your glutes (butt) went from squishy to solid.

That's bracing.

Engaging your pillar muscles by tying them together, and then using the proper breathing mechanism and padding all areas with air makes a tight brace!

Now, you are going to lift insanely!

The actual breath

Breathing properly is not an easy skill. Breathing behind the shield, or breathing while braced is going to take you a long time. Don't worry. You have the right mental model to approach it.

Think of a sport where the effort is obvious. Say, a fast bowler in cricket. Or a tennis player blazing a shot, or hitting an ace. You can feel the power and hear the grunt.

That grunt, that exhale aids the output.

In slow, heavy moves, you breathe differently and you generate much higher tension levels. In sport, in ballistic, you breathe and brace at different tension levels. This should be obvious to you as you think about it.

When you begin, as long as you are bracing, you can practice this safely by grunting, similar to a tennis shot. Brace and grunt, and you will see that the grunt helps you tighten up a bit more and exert. I have a drill for you below.

A note on tension

The air pressure of some car tyres is high. For some tyres, it is lower.

Similar, the amount of tension you create for different movements is different. High for slow, heavy movements and lower for faster movements.

The deadlift (high) versus sprinting (low). The right amount of tension allows the best expression of strength (and power).

Creating and expressing and manipulating tension is a key skill.

Going deeper into this concept is unnecessary for now.

Note: Folks with blood pressure issues and hypertension should be careful with all of these. Please talk to your doctor.

Blow out some candles

A drill you can practice safely to learn to breathe and brace before you try these in the gym is to blow out some candles.

Light a candle or ten. Stand a few feet away. Get into a standing plank.

Brace.

Inhale.

Now, while holding the brace, blow out the candles.

See what happens to your pillar! It will get even stronger.

Note: I am not going into hardstyle breathing and how we can exploit Bernoulli's principles to generate higher levels of tensions and all that.

Putting it all together

* Engaging your pillar by connecting the straps together.

* Bracing the pillar muscles at the appropriate tension levels.

* Breathing i.e. inhaling and exhaling while maintaining #1 and #2.

Putting all these together is a skill you will practice and hone for a long time.

Strength is a skill. Learning the technical movement, the right mechanics etc is one huge part. Learning to tie your body together and breathing and bracing (and tension) is a common thread to all physical endeavours and it will spill over into every physical activity.

Practice it in simple moves. The plank is one where you can work on squeezing the muscles for maximum tension and going for maximum pressure. While running, you can work on minimal tension. Remember, minimal is still non-zero.

What I've found crucial is the integrity of the straps i.e. focus on ensuring there are no leaks. Once you can do that, turning up the tension and the squeezing of the muscles will work magic.

Because if there's a tiny leak in your car tyre, it is just a matter of time before there's a flat.

Learn to tie your pillar together with zero leaks. With that one skill, you will be far ahead of the curve!

That’s it for today! I’ll see you next week. Thanks for your time.

After an amazing bit of weather, the sun feels a bit strange and welcome in my hometown of Madras.

This week, I wrote about 3 things. I am particularly excited about the core piece.

* Friendly fire. I’ve written about saboteurs before. In our journey of health and fitness, we are the biggest saboteur. And when we out-manoeuvre that fellow, our friends and family turn to be saboteurs. Without punching anyone in the face, how do we deal with this?

* 3 quotes, including one by Agassi.

* A layman’s introduction to understanding the core. What the heck is it? With the framework I’ve laid out, never be confused ever again about what you are supposed to be doing with our core.

Let’s get going!

Let’s start with the core

What muscle is the core exactly?

Using your core is essential to any form of physical training. It is paramount for safety. Training your core to function, to tie your body together is a skill that you develop by using various drills. And then you subject it to higher levels of stress when you lift weights or get on the rings or do whatever you do.

If you've been to a gym or dabbled in fitness, you've heard of this term. But what does it actually mean?

Is it a specific body part? Like the lats or biceps or whatever? Does it refer to the abs? Then why wouldn't we just say abs?!

The core is not one muscle or a muscle group. It is a catch-all term.

The core refers to whatever parts of the body that transfer power or work done. This varies between movements i.e. some movements have more moving parts, say the deadlift or running, while some movements have less moving parts, say the military press.

An example: The Olympic Snatch

The function of the core is to keep the bits that need to remain stable, stable. So that the bits that move can move better. Think how you are on a stable foundation (the floor) vs an unstable foundation (a BOSU ball). You want to have a stable foundation - internally. That's the function of the core. The bits (limbs) that move generate power (think legs in sprinting) and/or move the load (a kettlebell or Olympic snatch).

In the video above, Klokov is moving some ridiculous weight. Here is how the lift is done, without going into any technical detail.

* Legs drive into the floor.

* Hips take over.

* Together, #1 and #2 have generated the power to lift the weight. But that's not enough

* The core needs to transfer, with minimum transmission loss, this power/work done to the load. Else, the load won't be lifted.

* The load is held by the arms. The arms are connected to the shoulders.

* The legs and hips generate power. This power is transmitted upwards, through the midsection (core), and to the shoulders, and voila - the barbell flies up.

In this example, the core is the trunk of the body, the pillar. The parts between the shoulder and the hip.

Power transmission lines

For your electronic devices to work, electricity is supplied to your house. The electricity is generated in some far-away place and then transmitted via power lines.

Due to various inefficiencies in the transmission, there is a significant difference between what is produced and what is eventually utilised. But that's the nature of the game.

If we produced 100 units and our transmission efficiency is 50%, then we get only 50 units. There are two ways to increase the amount - produce more or improve transmission efficiency.

To get stronger or faster (and for better endurance or fat loss or almost any adaptation), you need to learn to improve both the production and the transmission efficiency.

In addition to transmission efficiency, a proper core function is mandatory to keep you safe.

A different example: The KB Press

What's the core here? The moving part is just the working arm. So, pretty much everything below it is the core.

Your glutes and your quadriceps, for example, are part of the core in a press. But in most movements, they are the prime movers.

The intent is not to confuse you but to drive the point home that the function is the transfer of power and providing a stable foundation for the moving parts to do the moving and lifting.

Focus on the pillar

For healthy, safe lifting, you need to have a strong mid-section. Let's use the word pillar (Exos uses this and I think it is a good term that does the job) for the rest of this article.

While the core will change depending on the movement, to be a better lifter (or a gymnast or martial artist or anything in the realm of physical fitness), you need to have a strong and functional mid-section. Pillar!

This is not just your abs - the 6-pack. Instead, think of your pillar as a six-sided box.

* The front of the box - that's your abs. And well, stuff underneath and near it. But pfft, irrelevant technicalities. Think of this as straps running from your sternum to the top of your pelvis. From somewhere just below your nipples to a bit below the belly button where some bony bits are (if you sit, you fold at your hip joint. Poke yourself at the part you fold, you'll see what I mean).

* The sides of the box - think of straps running from your armpit to your hips.

* The back of the box - think of straps running from your shoulder blades to your pelvis.

* The bottom of the box - this is your pelvic floor. When you sneeze, you squeeze this automagically. When you really need to pee but the loo is 200 metres away, you hold it in and walk real fast, right? That's the pelvic floor in action again.

* The top of the box - let's ignore this for now.

Shtraps, straps, shraps

You don't need to worry about what the actual muscles are called and all that. That's for you to geek out.

You simply need to know that you need to focus on (at least) the 4 sides of the box. The bottom and top are harder and will come by later.

I like to think of straps running all around my body, from shoulder to hip. The straps run vertically and diagonally. When I set up for a lift, I tighten my straps. If I tighten too much in front, the front crunches/shrinks. If I tighten the straps at the back more than the front, I have a big arch on my chest (think Bench Press). Depending on the movement, you use this.

My recommendation. Don't overthink it. Try to use all straps on all sides evenly. Stay neutral. Once you get past a certain skill level, all of this will make a lot more sense and then you can start figuring out more stuff.

To clarify, straps (shtraps) are not an actual muscle or muscle group. Due to a combination of a coffee shortage and my hurried instruction, I had a couple of my students ask me about this. So, the clarification (and misspelling).

To summarise

* The core's function is to keep your back safe. And to transmit power efficiently.

* The more efficient it is, the better. Else, you are wasting energy creating power but that's dissipating. Think of the power lines that bring electricity to your home.

* Pillar is a better term than the core. The pillar is a 6-sided box. Our pillar is 360 degrees - think of wearing a corset. Plus the bottom. And the top that we are ignoring (for now).

* The limbs move. The pillar provides a stable pathway.

* Think of straps running down vertically and diagonally, from shoulder to hip, all around. Tighten the straps (like a backpack strap being tightened, so that the backpack does not jostle) and hold them there and lift/move.

A drill that you can work on is the bird-dog.

And next week

I'll continue this next week, diving into what the heck bracing means. Breathing and bracing are an integral part of all of this and I've conveniently ignored all of it.

Other parts I've left out are tension levels. Keeping the pillar on at a certain tension level varies for each movement - maximum for the deadlift and moderate-to-low for ballistic movements, like a jump.

Can you think of ONE person in your circle who is into physical training and would find it useful? If so, please share. I’d hugely appreciate it.

3 quotes for this week

A point of view is that quintessential human solution to information overload, an intuitive process of reducing things to an essential relevant and manageable minimum.— Paul Saffo

I think all of us abstract and reduce things into various different formats. Either in the form of a to-do list or "I stand for this" or any such expression.

A useful way I do this (but it doesn't help with feelings of imposter syndrome) is ... well, here's an example.

Topic: Sun, sunscreen, vitamin D. What?

Information in my head:

* Going out in the sun for the body to make vitamin D only works between 11 am to 3 pm.

* Wear sunscreen that specifically mentions/blocks UVB. Don't just focus on SPF.

And that's about it. I find that this is adequate to answer 90% of the questions that crop up, in relevance to what I learned from my research. Now, until something dramatically changes in the research, do I really need to know more?

Prize Intensity more than Extent.Excellence resides in quality not in quantity. The best is always few and rare: much lowers value. Even among men giants are commonly the real dwarfs. Some reckon books by the thickness, as if they were written to try the brawn more than the brain. Extent alone never rises above mediocrity: it is the misfortune of universal geniuses that in attempting to be at home everywhere, are so nowhere. Intensity gives eminence, and rises to the heroic in matters sublime.– Baltasar Gracian

Intensity and quality - if you focus on this in your (strength) training, you are doing it right.

Derek Sivers' books and articles come to mind immediately.

Finally, when my grades hit bottom, my rebellion reaches the breaking point.I walk into a hair salon in the Bradenton Mall and tell the stylist to just give me a mohawk. Razor the sides, shave them to the scalp, and leave just one thick strip of spiked hair down the middle.Are you sure, kid?I want it high, and I want it spiky. Then dye it pink....To the casual observer I've done something that seems like a desperate effort to stand out. But in fact I've rendered myself, my inner self, my true self, invisible. At least, that was the idea.– Andre Agassi, Open

Besides some sassy old people, who just stop giving a s**t and be how they wanna be, most of us do hide a true part of ourselves.

Read this book for a great story about a legend, and you can see both perspectives. I guess if you dislike tennis, you shouldn't read it.

And oh, of course, age alert. If you don't know who Agassi is, I guess it won’t make much sense. A couple of months back, I made a Matrix reference in class and had a couple of people blink at me. Which came out 21 years ago. Wait what?!?!?!

Friendly fire, Sabotage, Homeostasis

Cleaning out your pantry is one of the best fat loss techniques there is. By putting a significant barrier between you and it - chocolates or biscuits or ice cream or peanut chikki or chips or whatever - you improve your odds of staying on track. Family members will stock up on extra chocolates and biscuits at this time coz it is raining, coz they want it. And if you are on a diet, you should have willpower.

Sock 'em on the jaw. Throw out the junk and say you ate it all. F**k 'em!

You've been vacationing (at home) a bit too much. Drinking or smoking or whatevering a bit much and you want to take a break, for at least a month. Friends who cajole you and tell you that "just this one time machan" and put some peer pressure.

Sock 'em on the jaw. Or ignore their calls for a few days.

You will sabotage your attempts at fitness. So will your loved ones. That's just how it is. Of course, they want the best for you. Just like you want the best for yourself. It doesn't mean they don't like you. It simply is.

In biology, there's a wonderful concept called homeostasis. Your body temperature, for example, needs to be maintained at an optimal level. If it gets too cold outside, you start shivering and your teeth start chattering. This is an attempt to raise body temperature - homeostasis in action.

Your family and friends are not sabotaging you because they are secretly jealous. They are not in alignment with you. Because you are disrupting the homeostasis of how things are going - of the party, of an evening out, of regular family life.

Coz you are out of whack with them. Not the other way around.

There's no right or wrong here. You have taken a great decision but you cannot do this alone. You need to figure out how to handle friendly fire and saboteurs.

Please don't sock 'em on the jaw.

Thanks for spending your valuable time here. If you found any of these useful, please do share with just ONE or TWO people. Help me grow my community of readers. I truly appreciate it.

Hope you had a great Deepavali or at least used it as a solid excuse for a long weekend and lots of food and chilling. I certainly did.

On to the 3 posts for today,

* on traditions and Deepavali. Should you burst crackers? Should you pollute? What about the dogs and the noise pollution? And where do these crackers come from?

* 3 quotes, as always. With a book recommendation and a movie recommendation.

* scales and beats. You start with basic drills and you keep doing it and you get better, and then you start putting things together. That’s how most skills work. Including music. Including fitness. Including fat loss.

on Deepavali and traditions

The only day I used to wake up at 4 am for

A day to celebrate the triumph of good over evil. That's the legend, anyway. But it does not matter today what the actual reason is. Over the past hundreds (thousands) of years, Deepavali is a tradition that is celebrated by the vast majority of India**.

Deepavali is just an excuse. If you are atheist or grew up in a different religion or practice a different one, replace it with a different word that makes more meaning to you. In this article, I will use the word "Deepavali".

Long, long ago, before waking up at 4 am become the norm in my life, Deepavali marked the only day when I'd wake up at 4 am. After the initial grumbling and whining, the first few hours of events and rituals are deeply embedded in my memory. The oil. The bath. The new clothes. The crackers and fireworks. Being together as a family, with the uncles and aunts and grandparents and everyone. In particular, having my grandmother assist me while I burst crackers - her job would be to close my ears as I ran scurrying back after lighting one.

It is a day and tradition that has a lot of fun and joyous memories. I am sure you have a day like that as well. Or quite a few days. Quite a few traditions.

Whataboutisms

As you grow up, you realise that the noise is horrible. You never truly cared for it. You enjoyed all the other aspects around it though.

You've heard about child labour but are confused about how that can be a thing, coz you go to school and have whatever you need. Privilege etc are things you are oblivious to.

Your dogs are petrified of the noise. They shudder and huddle in corners of your house, under the bed, refusing to eat. It is a nightmare for them. You start to despise the crackers.

Then there's the climate change aspect. The smog and pollution created by this one tradition, while hard to quantify versus the pollution we create by existing, is a bit ridiculous and overwhelmingly obvious as it is visible during and immediately after. You see the streets littered with the aftermath.

All of these factors combine in your head and you decide you are against all of this.

Where do you draw the line?

But what do you stop? Do you stop buying fireworks? Do you stop celebrating? Should you do more and raise awareness about child labour? Is that still a thing, in this digital age? You realise you remain a wee bit oblivious in your cocoon.

And of course, the plight of the street dogs running away, scared and trying to find a place to get away from it is obvious as you drive around.

A spectrum

As I think about uncomfortable things (finally!), it comes down to what helps me sleep at night. As self-centred as that might seem, that's what it is.

What are my values? What is my stance? On what all?

This is never black or white. It is crude to say if you are not against child labour, you are for it. The spectrum instead can be construed as

* I don't give a s**t. I've always burst fireworks and I am going to continue.

* I cannot carry the world's problems. I just want to have my fun.

* I am confused and I don't know what to do. I'll just carry on doing what I normally do but maybe tone it down a bit.

* -------------------------------------------------------------------

* I am unsure but I can see that (a) pollution is a factor and (b) I love dogs. So, I will not burst crackers.

* I am well informed and I'll ensure that my family and my immediate community make informed decisions.

* This is horrible! How can you be blind to all of this? It is my job to yell it out from the rooftops and create change.

The black (#1) or white (#7) has a spectrum in-between. And most of us fall somewhere in between. Even though the world (which falls in between too) keeps trying to put us in one camp or the other.

Where you fall is up to you. Going from 1 to 4 is a big leap. I think we make movements along the spectrum only i.e. step by step. You need to figure out what your values are and take a call. And while as a dog person, I cannot fathom how someone could be in #1, that's just me being silly.

Keep the tradition. Drop what does not make sense.

There are a lot of wonderful memories associated with this tradition. Throwing all of them out, and throwing out the possibilities of creating new memories is not the answer. At least for me.

Dissociating the bursting of crackers, the noise, the waste from the tradition and crafting a new tradition for you and your family and your friends is an option.

Lunch with family. Gifts. Dinner with friends and kids. More gifts. Spending time together. Creating new memories. Creating new traditions, built on the old ones.

I am a person who is not big on birthdays, today. But what birthdays were as a kid - cake and gifts and all the fuss is about you - need not be replicated. Today, birthdays can just be an excuse for me to hang out with friends or family, or to buy the 39 books that I have on my wish list. Using the tradition and putting a new spin on things is totally possible.

Rewrite what does not make sense. Keep what makes sense.

Maybe it means you have dinner and drinks with friends. Or maybe it means you quit your job and invent a new type of firework that does not make sound or pollute. Or you invent ear muffs for dogs.

Above all, know your values and do your best. If there is something that can be "not okay", ignorance and being oblivious come close. Don't stick your head into the sand and pretend all is fine.

I'll end this by quoting someone who is a far better writer than I am. From Jordan Peterson,

Every rule was once a creative act, breaking other rules. Every creative act, genuine in its creativity, is likely to transform itself, with time, into a useful rule. It is the living interaction between social institutions and creative achievement that keeps the world balanced on the narrow line between too much order and too much chaos. This is a terrible conundrum, a true existential burden. We must support and value the past, and we need to do that with an attitude of gratitude and respect. At the same time, however, we must keep our eyes open – we, the visionary living – and repair the ancient mechanisms that stabilise and support us when they falter. Thus, we need to bear the paradox that is involved in simultaneously respecting the walls that keep us safe and allowing in enough of what is new and changing so that our institutions remain alive and healthy.

Note **: Because the country is primarily Hindu, the festival is celebrated by the majority of the country. Some of the smaller (in size of community) religions celebrate it as well.

3 quotes for this week

We all do crazy stuff with money, because we're all relatively new to this game and what looks crazy to you might make sense to me.But no one is crazy - we all make decisions based on our own unique experiencesthat seem to make sense to us in a given moment.– Morgan Housel, from The Psychology of Money

A great book. You should definitely read it if you haven't already. He writes so well.

Replacing money with fat loss or fitness could work just as well.

We all do crazy things. My evenings with the ab-belt that gave you electric shocks are a memory that makes me laugh.

Throw yourself into this entirely. Find what you love and let it kill you.– Derek Sivers, talking about the music business.

Obsessions and diving into something can turn into paradigm-shifting events. Not everything turns out into a great story you read about in the papers or made into a neat movie (seen My Octopus Teacher yet?)

Many times, these can be just between you and you.

Caution in concentration -Concentration is a form of exclusion,and where there is exclusion,there is a thinker who excludes.It is the thinker,the excluder,the one who concentrates,that creates contradiction,because then there is a centre from which there can bea deviation,a distraction.– Bruce Lee

What?????

That was my reaction the first time I read this, years ago. I understand that the words were English, but nothing beyond that.

The most confounding parts of my baby steps in meditation are the exercises where one looks for who/what's looking. So, in theory, I understand what these words mean now. Progress :)

On scales and beats, and rolling and crawling

Babies learn to use their heads, then roll, and then crawl. From there, the progression proceeds to walking.

When you enrol kids for music/singing lessons, they start with scales. And from there, they learn to keep a beat. From there, the progression proceeds to songs.

Simple.

Oh yes, there is that little bit about thousands and thousands of conscious repetitions. You keep repeating the same thing and you do it marginally better. You flop around. You try to roll and fail. You try to hit a scale and hit 3. You get better. But it is not consistent.

It gets boring. It gets annoying. And then you do something cool and it is suddenly a lot of fun. And this repeats.

As long as you keep at it, you get better.

As long as you keep pushing at the edge of your skill level, you get better.

This is how it is. And you know it.

Fixing your diet or losing fat is no different. They require you to master fundamentals, like eating vegetables, planning your meals, chewing your food. They require you to go to your training, learn the movement vocabulary, and be coached.

I am obviously biased towards coaching because a good teacher can make all the difference in your journey. But you can do it by yourself too. As long as you stick to the process.

To get good at something, you keep doing it. You keep perfecting old ways of doing it and you come up with new ways of solving problems too.

That's why the quick-results gang will always be searching for quick results. Every few months. And unfortunately for them, they will succeed. Which tells them they are right and I am an idiot.

But unless you learn habits, unless you learn maintenance, unless you figure out your principles, you will keep coming back to the same problem. And pretend it is a different problem.

Thanks for spending a few minutes from your day with me here. I’d appreciate it if you can share your thoughts/feedback with me, or share this post with ONE person.

Hope your weekend has been a blast so far. I’ve had a good couple of weeks - training is going well and reading is going well too.

I love the concept of mental models. They help you frame certain concepts differently and understand them better. I’ve used one in my writing for this week and I hope you find it useful.

Before we get started, thanks for spending your time here. And if you think it’d be relevant, I’d appreciate a share.

Alright, the 3 things for today are

* How to hack portion control. Or are you eating what you need, or eating according to a pre-set pattern?

* 3 quotes, featuring Einstein, Jarmusch, and Sivers.

* How you can hit your escape velocity. And get way way way ahead of square one!

How you can hack portion control

Eating at home

Eating at home means eating familiar food. Stuff you've been eating for years and years. There's a lot of nostalgia involved. And there is a lot of preset patterns involved too.

My dad used to tell us this story of him growing up. Living in a communist family with 6 mouths to feed, portions were strictly rationed. As the eldest, his quota for breakfast was 3 idlis. His father, my grandfather, comes from a village in the Kumbakonam district and they would visit frequently. Back at the ancestral home, things worked differently. There was food in abundance. When my dad would sit with the other kids (not just his siblings but all the other cousins and what-not), he would stop at 3 idlis. When asked if he wanted more, he apparently responded "But I already ate 3". After much laughter, he was served more. And more.

Like my dad, we all have a number set in our heads. While circumstances may be different (today we have the issue of surplus. too much food!), repetitive patterns and years of eating have set this number.

If it is dosai for dinner, you already know the number of dosais you eat. If it is paratha for dinner, you know how many you are going to eat. If it is rice for dinner, you know you are going to have sambar, rasam, and duh, of course, some curd rice too.

Your appetite has been trained by you, more or less. Your stomach size is also developed over the years. So, come at dinner time, you know what and how much of it is going in. But how can that be?

If you are someone who wants to eat a bit more intuitively and slowly, this is the post for you.

Patterns again

This preset number, this pattern of "the clock strikes this o'clock and so I am going to eat this much food" is useful but when our current eating habits are the issue, this is a ripe place to change.

Conversations with not just my students but with my aunts and uncles and acquaintances who are not into what I do, a pattern becomes obvious. Most of you eat more than you need. This has to do with a combination of factors - habits and patterns, as well as eating a meal that is low in nutrients and fibre.

I want to address the first part of this post.

For the latter, up your food quality aka eat more protein and vegetables. You know the drill.

Eating signals

If we eat when we are hungry and based on how hungry we are, we determine the quantity, it is a big shift.

If you had a heavy workout, you are probably gonna have a bigger appetite.

If you had a day where you were stuck in front of your laptop and moved minimally, you need lesser food than a normal day.

Eat when you are hungry. Eat until satiety. These are 2 guidelines that can liberate you from your pre-set patterns of not just overconsumption but consuming the wrong amounts.

But maybe this is a bit too open-ended. How can we improve on this?

Setting a timer

Training wheels are useful.

What if you set a timer on your phone for 20 minutes when you started eating? You can ignore your timer after but your goal is to finish approximately around the 20-minute mark.

Remember, these are just training wheels.

You will not need to eat with this timer for the rest of your life. Just you being aware of the pace you are eating at will create change.

And let's add one more guideline. How about you wait 5 minutes after finishing before you decide on a second helping?

Putting it together

The broad guidelines we start with are

* Eat when you are hungry.

* Eat until satiety.

But these guidelines fail many times. Eating at a schedule, eating as a family, social obligations - all of this might not allow us to follow #1.

Eating to satiety is a hard skill because of the delayed signals the gut sends to the brain, to stop eating. By then, you've already had a bit more food than you needed.

So, we hack the meal with the following two guidelines.

3. Set a 20-minute timer and eat. If you finish early, wait for the 20 minutes to be over.

4. And wait a further 5-10 minutes before you get your second helping.

These take a bit of getting used to. But you'd be surprised by how your portions change when you follow these guidelines.

After all, we are what we ate. Years and years of mild overeating can cause us to put on some kilos. Hacking our habits to chip away at it is a game-changer.

Try this out for 2 weeks and let me know how it goes.

Think long-term. Think habits.

3 quotes

The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.– Einstein

We are not the same person we were 1 year ago. Definitely not the same person 10 years ago.

And yet, we behave as if we were.

To solve a problem facing us, we must grow/change/evolve and expect to solve the problem.

Nothing is original.Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination.Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows.Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul.If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic.Authenticity is invaluable;originality is non-existent.And don’t bother concealing your thievery - celebrate it if you feel like it.– Jim Jarmusch

This was sent across to me from a friend and regular reader. I love this.

Back in my youth, whenever I'd get an idea, I'd be convinced of two things. One, it was revolutionary and the bestest idea ever. Two, it was original and no one had ever thought of it.

Today, whenever I get an idea, I scribble all around it and wait a day or two. And then once I am done vomiting everything out, I search the Internet for other people who've had that idea and what they've done with it.

Ideas are (mostly) useless. It only matters what you do with them. Just because someone else has already thought of your great idea does not mean you cannot take it somewhere. Dream!

Whatever excites you, go do it.Whatever drains you, stop doing it.– Derek Sivers

In addition to doing the occasional time logs, I've recently started doing energy logs. There are some days when I feel great. And some days when I feel absolutely drained. Some days when my brain does not fire at all at the end of the day and I am just staring at a book, and then eventually close it and go watch TV. And other days when I cannot put the book down or stop writing thoughts and ideas.

It all has to do with the energy balance. I think.

Escape Velocity

Square 1, Square 2 ... Square -3

You lose 5 kilos. You've started the year on a roll. Freshly motivated and rejuvenated from taking some time off, you've realised this is what you want to do. This is the time when you nail things.

And a few months later, you find yourself in the same old place. Back to square 1.

Why the f**k does this keep happening to you?

And as you look at photos or training videos from 4-5 years ago, you realise that maybe what you think as square one is actually square -3. What the fudge?! This situation is getting worse.

When you look at your diets, your bursts of motivation with a narrow time window, say 4-12 weeks, you've always done a great job. You've knocked it out of the park.

But when you zoom out and look at them with a 6-12 month window (let's not even get into longer than that), sheesh, it makes for terribly unflattering viewing.

Maybe fat loss is not what you've been grappling with. I always start with it because that is what the vast majority, including me, grapples with. Especially at the start. Until one learns to get past square 1.

Maybe you've been trying to put on a few kilos of muscle. Maybe you've been trying to kick your sugar habit. Or your alcohol habit. Or maybe just do a lot less of this, as opposed to "I'll NEVER EVER do it again."

Whichever way you spin it, when you zoom in - great. When you zoom out - terrible.

Why? How? Can you get out of this square? When do you win this game?!?

Or is this going to be a perennial game of snakes and ladders - inevitably coming back down? Do you just make peace with that as the game?

How does a rocket leave the Earth?

For an object like a space shuttle to leave the Earth's gravity, it needs to create a tremendous amount of energy in a rather short duration.

The Earth pulls all things on it towards its centre. To escape its gravitational reach, one must hit escape velocity. Which is calculated as ~11 kilometres PER SECOND. At that speed, you can travel from Delhi to New York in well under 2 minutes.

What the heck does that matter? Well, I want to introduce the mental model of escape velocity and why that is pertinent to you and your journey of fat loss (or muscle gain or get out of square 1 permanently).

For the Earth, this is the escape velocity. For a larger planet, like Jupiter, the escape velocity is much higher (~5.3 times). Meaning the speed required will get you from Delhi to NYC in under 20 seconds!

You are what you ate

As Coach Dan John says, you are what you ate.

You are not in your present condition because of what happened yesterday or last week. But everything you've been doing or not doing for a much much longer time than just last week or month or year.

You are your habits.

The reason you keep getting pulled back is that you are not able to hit the requisite escape velocity. People who you see pull it off successfully, either they've managed to create it. Or the size of their baggage aka gravitational pull, and thus the required escape velocity is lesser than yours.

It is irrelevant.

What matters is only you, and your escape velocity.

The escape velocity is too high

Trying to undo years of sub-par habits, years of accumulation of baggage, years of moving into the negative space - it has a cost.

And all of you want to hit escape velocity in a few weeks, just like leaving the Earth. But for most of you, that is way too high.

You think you hit it with your 6-week diet, or your month of no-sugar, or even something longer and harder and more restrictive.

But you are not out of the Earth's gravitational pull. You think you are when you lose those 5 kilos or make a significant dent in your goals. You think you've made great forward progress.

Yes, you most definitely have.

But you have not hit escape velocity.

Once you (eventually) hit escape velocity, it does become a lot easier to keep flying towards the Moon. Or Neptune. Or to other galaxies.

Remember, this is a mental model. This is a metaphor. It does not translate 100%, nor should it.

Because you truly only escape when you change your habits. And this happens naturally, it happens inevitably as you get rid of your baggage, as you escape the gravitational pull.

You cannot replicate all of your current habits, the ones that are keeping you on square 1, and expect not to fall back down to Earth. It will happen.

The good thing is, you won't. Not once you've hit escape velocity.

Your habits will be vastly improved. Yes, you will of course have beer when you want and ice cream when you want and all that. But it will be different.

Where does this leave you?

A short-term burst, like a rocket launch, is required.

But that's not enough to hit escape velocity. Because for most of you, for most of us, we are on Jupiter and not on Mercury.

We have to keep at it for longer.

And trying to blaze fully, at 100%, for long durations is excruciatingly hard.

That's why habit change and consistency rule. You have to keep making forward progress, bit by bit. Some weeks, you blast off. Some weeks, you inch ahead. A couple of times, you slip up. But before the gravitational pull gets you, you inch ahead or you blast ahead.

Escape velocity is different for you than it is for a rocket ship. But the mental model is relevant. Think about it.

How does this change your thinking for 2022?

How does this change your thinking for November?

How does this change your thinking for next week?

Thanks for reading/listening. Do share this with a friend! I’ll see you next week.

Hope your weekend is going great. My new quarter is off and running. I had a great time at the StrongFirst barbell certification last weekend, and am excited to apply my learnings over the next few weeks (and years). I am also making one big change to my work - coaching much lesser than I normally do. More on that over the next few weeks.

On to the 3 things for this week.

* How do you find out what the right thing for you is? I was recently asked this on a radio show and thought I’d expand on my answer and share it with you.

* 3 quotes, as always.

* On a calorie deficit. If you are the analytical kind, this is a useful post for you to plan your fat loss or muscle gain. Yes, I know it says deficit but I cover both.

Here we go.

Find YOUR thing.

With experimentation. By trying it out.

By doing it. With the right mindset. And giving it enough time.

There are a gazillion options for fitness out there. There are umpteen diet protocols. And there are more and more people on the coaching side of things, as the fitness landscape opens up.

Inevitably, everyone starts to sound the same. The promises. The bravado. The 6-pack. The allure of transformations.

There are success stories in EVERYTHING. Including the most non-scientific bro-science methods out there. And there are failures - including in the best training protocols out there.

Because it all comes down to you.

As Coach Dan John says, there are many 8 weeks in 10 years. So, don't be in a rush. Pick one that resonates, talk to a couple of people in the community, talk to the coach - and jump in. Do it for 6-8 weeks and see how you like it. If you are okay with commitment, commit to a challenge - a race in 6 months, or a 6-month membership or whatever.

Before results, focus on effort. Just show up. Even if it is boring. Coz it will get tough and it will get boring, sooner or later. But keep showing up.

And after that, you will be a few steps ahead of where you are. And if what you are doing currently is not your cup of tea, don't force it. There are a lot of options out there, and you know a bit more about yourself now. Find something closer to your wavelength.

In a few attempts, in a few "8 weeks", you will get there.

Stay patient.

Experiment.

Find YOUR thing.

Is there a friend of yours who is confused about what to do? Do you think they could use some encouragement to find their own thing? If so, please share this post.

3 quotes

When pure feeling is corrupted by the intellect, there is mediocrity. That is what most of us are doing. Our lives are mediocre because we are always calculating, asking ourselves whether it is worthwhile, what profit we will get, not only in the world of money, but also in the so-called spiritual world – "If I do this, will I get that?"– Jiddu Krishnamurti

Patterns and habits repeat across realms. I've found myself asking this question multiple times. In fact, when I attempted meditation seriously for the first time last year, that was one of the first questions I put across to someone who had been doing it for years. My second question was on the timeline for enlightenment. Thankfully, he just laughed and let me off on both counts.

To make knowledge practical we must convert it into rules of operation. We must pass from knowing what is the case to knowing what to do about it if we wish to get somewhere.– Mortimer Adler and Charles Van Doren from "How to read a book"

Almost every book I read is practical in nature. But what I've gotten out of these practical books is rather limited simply because I have not converted them into rules of operation.

Simply ensuring that a practical book needs to be applied has limited the amount of reading and multiplied the amount of learning and outcomes in my reading process.

You were taught that reading is extraction.– Verlyn Klinkenborg

Reading out loud, reading for pleasure, reading and finding the not-meaning in books, going with the rhythm, imagining the world being built - there are so many pleasures to reading as one gets more skilled at it.

As a kid, fiction was something I devoured. But theoretical books and well, any non-fiction book was data and information to be extracted. But wow. Reading can be so much more than that. How much more is something I feel I've just started to scrape the surface of.

Calorie deficit and why that is important to know

The First Law

Energy can neither be created nor destroyed. It can only be transformed.

To lose weight, you need to expend more energy than you consume. To gain weight, you need to consume more energy than you expend.

The unit of measurement used is a calorie. It doesn't matter what that means or how it is calculated or whether it is actually a kilocalorie. You can call it whatever you like.

From the First Law of Thermodynamics, we realise the constraint.

You have a lot of stored energy

Let us use an example. 70 kg male at 20% body fat. The goal is to get to 15% body fat.

The goal is thus 3.5 kilos (5% of 70 kilos) of fat loss. One kilo of fat is 7700 calories [see reference]. Multiplying that by 3.5 gives us ~27,000 calories.

For simplicity's sake, we will assume that all loss in weight that we see will be fat. This is practically impossible and the most one can generally aim for is a generous skewing of the ratio towards fat vs muscle.

So, to lose weight, our imaginary guy has to, over the course of an agreed-upon timeframe, eat 27000 calories lesser. If the stars align, these 27000 calories come directly from the stored energy source in the body aka fat.

What is maintenance?

Your body has an energy requirement.

To do its bodily functions. For you to sit and stand and walk around. To breathe. To digest food. To play football. To work at your computer. To watch TV.

The energy required by the body to neither lose weight nor gain weight is its maintenance number.

A 6-month timeframe for 3.5 kilos

Yes, you can lose weight a lot faster than this. But this is my example, my world.

Dividing 27000 calories by 180 days gives us 150 calories/day. Thus, we arrive at the calorie deficit needed to lose 3.5 kilos over a 6-month timeframe for our 70kg male friend.

A calorie deficit is essentially the difference between what the body's expenditure vs consumption is. Since the body still requires the extra energy to subsist and survive, that deficit has to come from somewhere. Which is all the excess fat you have in your body.  

Energy can only be transformed. The energy that we consumed in the days, weeks, months, years before this moment - that's what we are trying to lose when we say weight loss.

In essence, our calorie deficit today is simply balancing our calorie excess from earlier days.

How do you put on muscle?

Using the same example, if you want to add more weight to your body, you need to have a calorie surplus.

If you want to put on 3.5 kilos over 6 months, you need to eat 150 calories/day more than what is needed for maintenance.

Just like it is impossible to lose ONLY fat during a fat-loss programme, it is impossible to gain ONLY muscle during a muscle-gain programme. An important fact to know but irrelevant for now.

Where does this leave you?

There are accurate methods to calculate body fat percentage. A DEXA scan or a skinfold test, or a quicker (less accurate) method. With this and your weighing scale, you can make an estimate of how many kilos you want to lose. And from there, the calorie deficit you need to have over a day, across how many days.

Before we proceed further, you should know that ~5% body fat is essential for men and ~13% is essential for women.

Start by knowing some of the following.

* your weight.

* your body fat percentage.

* your goal - lose weight (fat) or gain weight (muscle).

* your maintenance energy requirement. Based on your age, your activity levels, using Google or by strapping on an HRM for an entire day - whatever you'd like.

And you can arrive at your calorie delta i.e. the deficit or surplus that you need to maintain, along with the timeframe.

And finally, a caveat

There are insensible methods to do both - losing and gaining weight. Don't do them. Or at least, I do not subscribe or prescribe them. But then, I am not the guy to talk to for single-digit body fat percentages as well.

* Starvation is not the answer (for fat loss). Feeling queasy and constantly full is not fun either (for mass gain).

* Nutrient density should be high. This will ensure that you do not starve or even come close. Try eating 5 cups of vegetables and 3 cups of protein, and let me know if you are still hungry.

* Your sanity levels need to be high. If you are snapping at your friends and family, what is the point of your dream body?

* Calorie counting is NOT a method I prescribe. It is a useful tool to use occasionally. Given that there are a lot of errors in calculation, differences in absorption and the tediousness of the actual counting and consumption of foods, it fails my sanity check.

I’d love it if you shared this post with ONE friend.

Thanks for spending a portion of your day here. I truly appreciate it.

Today marks 10 years since we ran our first-ever class at Bamboola. I can still see flashes of that day, feel the butterflies in my stomach as I coached my first-ever class. We even have some footage of Raj and me coaching in the old tennis court - makes for great nostalgia.

There is a lot to be grateful for. There is a lot to celebrate. So, yaaay!

On to the 3 things for today.

Find your “me” time

Sometimes, we set way too many expectations. Sometimes, we try too hard. After having not done anything consistently in the realm of fitness, while working 10-12 hour days, spending time with the family and friends, we still want to lose 10 kilos. ASAP!

9 times out of 10, you don't go to the gym. You don't do much about your nutrition. You don't get those results. You fail. You get angry with yourself or the gym. Or both. And you give up.

You set yourself up for failure from the start.

I am not telling you to aim lower. I am telling you to look at it from a completely different perspective.

Finding an hour to go to the gym is difficult. And a chore. And a means to an end. Well, re-think that.

Instead, it is the one hour where you can

* Work out your stress. Just sweat it out. Work it out. Release the tension and the stress.

* Find peace and quiet. Away from work. Away from chores. Away from your task lists.

* Recuperate. Rejuvenate. Recalibrate. Use that time.

* Meditate. It doesn't mean sitting in a corner and staring at the wall. It can be anything you want where your mind is not chattering.

Find your "me" time. That one hour away from the rest of the day will give you the distance you need. In the short term, it will give you the breather to tackle the day. In the long term, it will give you perspective.

And soon enough, you'll find that you are a fitness guy too. Instead of going to the gym to get results, you go to the gym coz you enjoy it.

Find your me-time. Find it at the gym. Find it while running. Find it in a group. Find it by yourself.

It is a paradigm shift when you do.

3 quotes for this week

Silence is essential. We need silence,just as much as we need air,just as much as plants need light.If our minds are crowded withwords and thoughts, there isno space for us.– Thich Nhat Hanh

Most of matter is the space between matter. Most of matter is emptiness. But the bonds within atoms, amongst atoms and so on creates magic.

I might be stretching this a bit much but I need more silence. More silence between my tasks. Between doing daily things. Between days. When I lose it, I suddenly realise it is September. When I don't, each day is savoured and remembered and eventful.

While I talk lesser than the national average, whatever that may be, my inner chatterbox unfortunately more than makes up for it. But the rare moments of silence produces flashes of intelligence.

But perfect freedom is not found without some rules. People, especially young people, think that freedom is to do just what they want, that in Zen there is no need for rules. But it is absolutely necessary for us to have some rules. But this does not mean always to be under control. As long as you have rules, you have a chance for freedom. To try to obtain freedom without being aware of the rules means nothing. It is to acquire this perfect freedom that we practice zazen.– Shunryu Suzuki

I like rules. Even though I detest quite a few of them, and have rebelled for the sake of it.

Even simple gully cricket needs rules.

Constraints help us expand. Without constraints, we tend to be rudderless.

Many books are hardly worth even skimming; some should be read quickly; and a few should be read at a rate, usually quite slow, that allows for complete comprehension. It is wasteful to read a book slowly that deserves only a fast reading;– Mortimer Adler

Some books are filled with anecdotes and fun to read. From the obscure to the fascinating, I marvel at how authors dig up these stories. But most often, they are making 1-2 core points over 250 pages. And when I finally worked up the courage to start skimming books, skipping few pages at a stretch, and getting the core idea - it was freedom. Certain books are meant to be re-read with slowness, patience, pauses, with silence. Certain books are meant to be skimmed. Certain books are meant to be thrown away.

Finding the right way to read each book is important. I needed to let go of my guilt to do this.

On overnight transformations

10 years

Today marks 10 years since The Quad ran our first-ever class at Bamboola. Seems eons ago. Feels like last week. A lot to be thankful for. A lot of people to be thankful to. I am not even going to try right now. A lot of learnings (this is not a "10 years, 10 learnings") Instead, I want to focus on one - the overnight transformation.

We've been fortunate to observe and walk along with 100s of students on their physical and mental transformations. Week in, week out, we've learned that what we think we sell and what we actually sell is not the same thing. That's been a huge learning.

And from the student's perspective as well, what they come in wanting versus what affects the transformation is almost never the same. Amongst the countless, enriching, mind-blowing conversations that we've had with our community, what we've realised is that the sky is the limit for transformations.

I am not talking about something as one-dimensional as weight loss. Yes, we have zillions of those. One cannot be a fitness company without giving weight loss (We deliver fat loss. Important semantics). But you can get that anywhere, especially if you are loose with your methods.

I am talking about the transformation of character and thought. Finding a side of you that you did not think existed. Finding strength where you thought there was none. Finding perseverance after years of giving up too soon. Finding consistency after years of being a dabbler, of trying things out and getting bored, and moving on.

Catalysts and climactic moments

We are proud to be a catalyst for these moments.

Except these are not singular moments. There's no amazing build-up to that climax that you are waiting for.

The world around us is engineered and filled with climactic moments. But that's fake - like television. From the Olympics to every movie, to cricket and football, the building up, that crescendo, the anticipation, and the glory - that's how it always happens.

Except that is not at all how it happens in your life. That's not how a transformation happens. Ever.

Instead, it is so gradual.

It is like watching a tree grow. Or seeing a bud blossom into a flower. It happens overnight, except all that glacial progress is there to see. Open your eyes.

And it is never linear. It is never "onwards and upwards". It is up and down. It involves getting lost. Getting re-routed.

A lot of my job is telling amazing students of mine how amazing they are. Because they miss their gradual progress. They get misled by climactic moments. They think that a glorious moment of thunder and lightning and angels singing will be the background when they lift the sword from the stone.

It won't be one moment. It will instead be many moments.

Moments. Plural.

Glorious, meaningful moments. You lift a weight you never thought possible. You squat deeper than you could. You walk up flights of stairs carrying grocery bags without being gassed. You limberly tie your shoelaces without needing to sit or groan. You lift that water can and put it on your dispenser. You get asked fitness and nutrition questions and doubts from your colleagues.

But all of them will be smaller than you anticipate. Because in your head, you are expecting a climactic moment. You are expecting to win the World Cup with a glorious 6er.

Seeing The Quad's journey over 10 years, observing my personal growth, observing my students' journey and transformations - it is filled with smaller moments. By no means are these smaller moments less meaningful.

In fact, these are what make it easy to wake up every morning at 3.45 am. To do what we do. Because there are so many personal and communal moments of joy, amazement, success, of failure.

Of course, there are peaks. But as soon as you stand on one peak, and you celebrate, you continue plodding along. Not searching for the next drink, or hit of an addictive drug, but continuing on your quest for self-improvement and growth.

As a company, as a founder, as a coach, as a trainee - these are the moments that truly matter. If there's one learning that I would like to continuously hammer into my head and my students', it would be this. There are 100s of moments. All of them are part of the fabric of our transformation. Don't discount any. Don't discount them in expectation of something larger. Because what you think the transformation is versus what the transformation is are radically different. And as you walk the path, you realise you were mostly wrong and THIS is just way better.

Thank you for reading!

Hope your weekend is going well. Mine’s been a blast so far. I had a fun time coaching yesterday morning, and also had the chance to hang out with some of my favourite students at lunch and see them outside of class. And chilled, watched some football. And that's just yesterday!

Enough about me. On to the 3 things for this week.

* Simple or Easy. What if we make 4 quadrants from there, copying Coach Dan John’s framework for viewing things, and see where it gets us?

* 3 quotes, featuring Jiddu Krishnamurti, Derren Brown, Carl Rogers.

* Is your eating out of control? Is that the problem? Or is the problem elsewhere? Let’s find out.

The Simple and Easy in 4 quadrants

We are wired differently. Certain things are more in tune with our unsaid preferences and prejudices that we find straightforward to comply with. Most times, it has very little to do with the actual task.

A few of you found sitting at a desk and listening to a teacher easy. Writing exams was simple. A few of you found sitting at a desk impossible, let alone paying attention. You froze when you wrote exams even though your prep was exceptional.

It happens.

Using simple and easy, I want to walk you through 4 quadrants.

Simple: not complex or fancy.

Easy: requiring or indicating little effort, thought, or reflection.

What I've seen is the less thought that's required to do something, the lower the barrier for entry. The less thinking and the more "Do This!" there is, the better the compliance and adoption.

Certain things are simple. Certain things are easy. Some are both. Some are neither. Understanding which quadrant they fall into will help you figure out what to dabble in and try out. And most of us will progress from Quadrant 1 to 2 to 3 to 4. A few might be able to make the jump directly to Q3 but that's dependent on some innate wiring going on already.

Quadrant 1: Simple + Easy

Walking.

It is simple. And easy. There's minimal skill requirement. There's minimal thought requirement i.e. what am I supposed to do and how am I supposed to do it.

Machine-based work at the gym falls here too. The machines have a low barrier to entry. It is hard to do them wrong.

Quadrant 2: Not Simple + Easy

Most diets fall here. Because of their strictly defined nature, it is easy to know what to do. It is easy to know when you've made a mistake.

Calorie counting seems to fall over here. It is tedious, requires a high level of detail, and it is beyond me to do it for longer than a week. But there are so many apps out there that make it easy for you to do.

Diets are clearly defined, thus requiring minimal thought. The effort involved is high but seems very doable for most beginners. They tend to be a bit complex, involving the removal of a food group or a lot of foodstuffs.

Once you get the hang of it, it gets even easier. But it does not get simpler - because there's a lot of complexity involved in navigating life. A ketogenic diet, for example, is not an easy diet to follow. Even a low-carb diet makes it hard and awkward in social situations. It is easy to follow but not simple at all.

Quadrant 3: Simple + Not Easy

The Daily9 system falls here. It requires you to know a lot more about your food, it requires you to eat a minimum amount of protein and vegetables. It requires you to get your sleep going. None of these is easy. For someone who has not eaten vegetables, upping the quotient is not an easy process.

But it is a simple system because it places extremely few constraints. You can follow any cultural way of eating, you can mix-and-match, you can eat one meal a day or 10. It doesn't matter. It conforms to however you want to eat.

There are a million ways to skin the system to make it work for you.

That makes life simple.

But it requires you to put your thinking hat on. Which means it is not as easy as calorie counting.

Contextualising is the difficult part for most of us. But once you do, it becomes simple and easy.

Quadrant 4: Not Simple + Not Easy

Transformations come here. They are neither simple nor easy. They require an inordinate amount of work, on top of ensuring all of your life is aligned and ready to take on the stress. You will need to follow a specific diet, most probably keeping a rather keen eye on calorie consumption and macronutrient consumption, have an intense training schedule, and of course, ensure you are getting enough sleep.

And you will need to do this for a few months.

What do you do with this?

For some of you, calorie counting might fall on simple + easy. That's what a lot of nutrition apps are betting on, and I can totally see how it leads there, after repeated use.

For some of you, walking might not be simple + easy. Maybe you have severe time constraints and solving that is not straightforward.

There's value in understanding what the toll of a task is. Some demand more time or more energy or both, and they form a barrier to entry. Calorie counting for me is impossible and D9 is second nature, but for a lot of folks, it is the other way around.

Knowing where things fall in your context is always a valuable tool. So, you know how much to invest and how long.

For the long-term, simple works. Easy works.

3 quotes

In the same way that the Platonic Idea of, say, tree-ness is different from and so much better than any particular tree we may see (which may have branches missing and other imperfections), so a person will never embody the qualities we perceive in them as perfectly as we might imagine. While the loss of self that we feel when worshipping another can feel intoxicating, there is no doubt that it can bring much pain when the all-too-human qualities of the targets of our obsessions become crushingly apparent.– Derren Brown

Hero worship. Having outlandish expectations. Pinning your dreams on someone else - your favourite sports team, your idol, your whatever.

Bruce Lee says this succinctly as well. About expectations.

The moment you are aware of confusion, of exactly what is, you try to escape from it. Those sects which offer you a system for the solution of suffering - economic, social, or religious - are the worst; because then system becomes important and not man - whether it be a religious system, or a system of the left or of the right. System becomes important - the philosophy, the idea, becomes important - and not man; and for the sake of the idea, of the ideology, you are willing to sacrifice all mankind, which is exactly what is happening in the world.[...]The system has become important. Therefore, as the system has become important, men, you and I, lose significance; and the controllers of the system, whether religious or social, whether of the left or of the right, assume authority, assume power, and therefore, sacrifice you, the individual. That is exactly what is happening.– J Krishnamurti

The great majority of us cannot listen; we find ourselves compelled to evaluate, because listening is too dangerous. The first requirement is courage, and we do not always have it.– Carl Rogers

Only last year I made the realisation that I am a terrible listener. It is because I evaluate and judge that I am poor at listening to myself, and to others. To simply listen without judgment, to simply listen with awareness and to do nothing about it. It seems like a first step but sometimes, it seems that's all there is to do. But sure enough, I find myself trying to solve things.

Is your eating out of control?

popping candy

Work's been hectic. A bunch of your colleagues got laid off and your team has had to do more work to bear the brunt. You have calls at all hours, worse than usual. With remote work being the norm, the meetings and schedules have gotten worse. Your day is no longer your day. Nor does it have anything to do with daylight but according to when the day is at New York or the Bay Area.

Everything about your schedule is out of your control, or so you've been led to believe.

You have no time or energy to think about food and so food is whatever is there on the table, or whatever is easy to order and devour. You walk out of a meeting at 6 pm, already at the end of an 8-hour day but you still have 3 more meetings. Thanks to the recent festival/birthday/wedding, there's a boatload of tempting snacks and you pop in a few and go back to your desk.

clothes feeling snug

You feel more drained. Your work suffers. But you feel you have no choice but to work even longer and harder. Food becomes a fun get-away. You order your favourite foods coz you tell yourself you deserve them. You are putting up with so much s**t at work that you deserve a break.

But it stops feeling as good as it used to, of course.

And is it your imagination, or are your clothes feeling a bit snugger than they used to?

Cut out all the ....

What the f**k?!?! All the hard work and discipline over the past few months have been destroyed because of this crazy phase. At home or at work, things have been so hectic that you did not have any energy and look what happens when you relax a bit. You've put on so much weight and the self-criticism becomes self-flagellation and unhealthy.

You decide to exercise extreme control. From zero control, you are on a DIET. Either you are cutting out most of your calories, or whatever the current enemy is - carbs or fats or whatever. And the pendulum swings all the way across.

Is food the core problem?

Imbalance is fine. We find balance over a time period filled with imbalances, constantly tinkering and titrating what we are up to. A bit of fun over the weekend, and a bit of work over the week - some kind of balance. A bit of fun in the evening after a long workday - balance. Whatever the time frame, we are used to this.

But this extreme lack of control over food to extreme control over food does not work. Why? From my experience, it is because we are not getting to the root of the problem. Is the problem about food? Most often not. The problem is about your day, your work, your frustration somewhere else that you are not willing to see or take ownership of. You have ceded control but maybe you should not have. Working 12-hour days or you'll lose your job? Is that so? Is that a job you want to be enslaved to? Are you truly okay to let that be out of your control? And because you are not, but at the same time unwilling to fix whatever that larger issue is, whatever the elephant in the room is, you are trying to control other smaller things. Which unfortunately can never fix the root cause. And so, everything goes unresolved.

Confront!

* Plan your weekly menu after a sumptuous, relaxed meal.

* Control your environment. Get rid of junk in your house and toss them in the bin.

* If you are at an extreme - stupidly eating everything in sight or severely restricted eating - recognise the red flag for what it is.

And know that the real issue is not your food. But something else in your life where you have relinquished control. But need to take control back.

Get back your workday. Get back your time with your friends or family. Get back to your routine. Get back your "me time". Fight for it. Sit down and confront what you are running away from.

And once you do, great!

Your out of control eating is a symptom of something else. Identify it. Confront it. Deal with it.

Thanks for spending a part of your day here. Hope at least one thing tickled your brain.

How’s the weekend going? Have some unwinding planned? If not, what?!?!?!

On to the 3 things for today.

* The critic and the other guy. We all have our inner critic. Why do we pay so much attention to that manifestation?

* 3 quotes for this week. Featuring Bruce Lee, Nassim Taleb, and Derek Sivers.

* What makes you tick? Have you thought about it? Are you playing the game that you think you should be playing because everyone else is? Should you be playing a different game? Do you have the time to find out? Can you afford not to find out?

The critic and the other guy

Lock your hips out more. Squat deeper. You are not bracing hard enough. Your feet are turned out too much. Your feet are not turned out enough. You could've put more power into that rep.

And so on. The inner voice, the critic can and will keep going if you let him.

The technical part of a movement can be broken down into quite a lot of steps and it is impossible to try and nail them. Well, at least for me. But that's what the critic is evaluating against. He has a checklist and is going over it for each and every rep you do.

And here's the kicker - is he being objective and precise about his observation? No. It is his judgment on how he thinks you did. Not impartial. Depends on what side of the bed he woke up on today.

But we all listen to him, and worse, we encourage him.

Think about days when you had a great training session or a gorgeous run where the mind felt refreshed and you came back beaming! I am willing to bet that somehow the critic shut up that day, or was otherwise occupied.

While I am a textbook follower for technical instruction, the "Don't think. Feel!" is my preferred approach. Because I know those days feel magical.

As I analyse my training days, the days I have the most learning are the days the critic took a vacation.

Trying to shut him up does not work, and often backfires. What I do is a combination of

* being aware of what I am doing. This works as great proprioception (where your joints are in space) drill, with the added advantage of giving the critic something to observe. Is my back straight? Are my knees going out? Am I gripping the floor?

* removing emotion from what did not go well. Criticising myself after a bad rep, or even encouraging myself that I can do better. Because by using the word better, I am judging my previous rep.

* Putting more positivity into what I did right. Or rather, if it "felt good", I mentally high-five myself and move on. I don't analyse what felt right or replicate it or whatever. Trying to replicate seems to make things worse.

The critic hovers around not only in my training sessions but all the time. As I write this post. As I read books. As I am talking to people. Hopefully, I am able to transfer these lessons more into those places. Or is that in itself a judgment?

And so we go into over-thinking mode. And that's a good time to stop.

3 quotes

An idea starts to be interesting when you get scared of taking it to its logical conclusion.– Nassim Taleb

Steven Pressfield talks about this too. While I find Taleb hard to understand, this one's rather straightforward. But only because I've seen it to be true in a few instances in my life.

I am on the verge of taking an idea to its logical conclusion - more on this in a few weeks - and holy s**t am I scared.

Only actions give to life its strength, as only moderation gives it its charm.– Bruce Lee

I've been in a book buying frenzy for a few months. Every time I finish a book, I realise there are 5 more that I absolutely NEED to read RIGHT NOW!!!!

But I've made a more important and obvious realisation. What am I taking out of the book and applying in my life? Because without that, the book is useless and I just wasted my time on it. Putting whatever the author says into context and into action - that's my gap.

Moderation - ah, that's an expert move. It is the solution to "how much should you exercise?" and "how much should I be eating?", except it is not easy.

When people would ask, "What are you doing to grow your company?" I'd say, "Nothing! I'm trying to get it to stop growing! I don't like this. It's too big." They thought that was the weirdest thing. Doesn't every business want to be as big as possible? No. Make sure you know what makes you happy, and don't forget it.– Derek Sivers

Derek provides a great counterpoint to what is the common approach that most of us take. A company NEEDS to grow. Except must it?

Can we instead take time to understand what growth means? And what fun means?

10 years ago, I had a lot of clarity about what I wanted to do with my life. Today, I am a lot more confused than I was 10 years ago. Patience and introspection, hopefully, will lead to clarity. Or noise reduction.

What makes you tick?

You don't know what you don't know

When I was in the 12th grade, I did not know much about much. I did not know what courses one could do in college (besides Engineering), what career options existed (besides writing code). Unfortunately, I did not know that I did not know. But with the blind naivety of youth, I blundered along. I did what everyone around me was talking about, assuming that would be the right answer. Whatever right meant, I still do not know.

I always assumed that once you made a choice into what your career was, you were locked in. And that was that. You did that for the rest of your life.

And work was something you had to do as an adult. Like taxes. You worked so that you could do other things in life.

None of those was true. Based on my limited worldview, I was constructing flawed assumptions and wrong mental models.

I quit one career to go to grad school. I quit my second career to move back to Madras. And my third career has been a blend of many things, of discovery and re-invention. Of many new experiences even as I do similar things daily.

This sparks one realisation - it is irrelevant whether you want to do the same thing for 50 years or 50 things. As long as you are in the moment, pushing yourself forward, experiencing and learning. But enough morals or what-not.

Assumptions

What other flawed assumptions have I made?

Or forget flawed. What assumptions have I made? Which I can re-make today? It does not have to be flawed. There cannot be only ONE path, right?

Is being successful in coming up with Facebook? But then there's the election rigging, the research that social media usage has increased depression, and whatever.

Is success Bill Bowerman and Phil McKnight, the founders of Nike? But then, what about all the research today that indicates shoes with a serious amount of cushioning and heel lift is causing a lot of upstream problems in our body?

Is success Richard Read? Who lived in a modest home, working a modest job, and left behind $8 million when he died.

The ones we never hear about

What about all the successful people we never hear about? The ones who are genuinely content, who are doing what they are here to do. Who are not playing social media wars? Who has won the money game, and said enough is enough. Who has decided to opt out? Who decided they didn't care about the money game or the fame game or whatever games that are being played.

The ones the media does not portray because it does not sell ads.

Well, it all depends on what you define success as.

Without that, you will be chasing someone else's dreams.

Chase your own

Maybe you are scared to go against the grain. For example, not having enough money in the bank is a scary proposition. But equally scary is not defining what that enough is. What if you keep moving goalposts, once you get there? What if more money does not mean more success but you were too caught up or scared?

The more perspectives, the more stories, the more we can grow our worldview. But more is not the answer. The idea, I think, is to see which strikes a chord deep within us. And to make our own weird concoction out of all that we see, and by listening to us deeply.

What makes you tick? What drives you? What warms your heart? What makes you produce your best?

Not finding that out for yourself, and instead of playing the games that everyone's playing (even if you play it real well) - that's anti-success.

Figure out your own game. Your own dreams. Chase them.

Thanks for reading. I’ll see you next weekend.

Hope things are going well at your end of the Universe.

Over the past 8 weeks, I’ve had four good training weeks and four not-so-good training weeks. For the first 4 weeks, I kept trying to make things happen. I kept trying to over-engineer things. Then, I did what I eventually do and write copious notes on it and keep repeating to myself that THIS IS WHAT I NEED TO DO (only to promptly forget it in a few weeks). I stopped trying. I got back to enjoying my training and having fun.

Hopefully, this 863rd time of re-learning this lesson, it sticks ;)

On to the 3 things for today,

* on playing an endless game and why that could be a way forward, to get out of this instant gratification game.

* 3 quotes. From Steven Pressfield, Anne Lamott, and Verlyn Klinkenborg.

* on a great training session I had, and the magic secret recipe for you to have only great training sessions and get a 16-pack in 16 days.

The Endless Game

You start off unable to run 500 metres, or walk up 5 flights of stairs, or bend down and tie your shoelace.

You run regularly and are able to run 10 kilometres at a stretch - that's frickin' brilliant and unbelievable. Do you now aim for 20 kilometres? What's after 20? 100?

Or do you change the game? But doesn't that go against the whole concept of Mastery?

You can totally change the game - why? Well, rules are what you make out of them. In the game of fitness, you can add more sub-games and sub-plots to it.

And you can come back to games you've played. Maybe after running 20 km, you decide more is not better. You want to run a faster 5k. Great! Or you want to run an Ultra - brilliant!

There are no wrong answers.

Well, except one, possibly. The point of the game is not to complete the game.

Coz then, what's the point?

The point of the game, I think, is to have fun and keep exploring boundaries.

Fitness can be an infinite game, and I strongly believe it should. Because it is a great vehicle to grow, and push yourself, and also have a great quality of life.

Don't be in a rush to squat your bodyweight or deadlift 2x or whatever, and think the game is done.

The game doesn't have to end.

And that's the best part!

3 quotes for this week

E. L. Doctorow once said that "writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can see only as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way." You don't have to see where you're going, you don't have to see your destination or everything you will pass along the way. You just have to see two or three feet ahead of you. This is right up there with the best advice about writing, or life, I have ever heard.– Anne Lamott

The connection she establishes with me (the reader) is mind-blowing. And her wit is stupendous. I find myself laughing out loud on more than one occasion, as I read the book.

And of course, scattered throughout are gold nuggets of wisdom which I hope my mind has somehow clawed on to and will regurgitate back to me when I need it.

That our project has crashed is not a reflection of our worth as human beings. It's just a mistake. It's a problem - and a problem can be solved.– Steven Pressfield

The hard part is framing the problem. If and when we can frame it, it stops being a monster. It stops being an unknown. This is obviously easier said than done.

But it is important. It is not a character flaw that is exhibited in the failure of the project. You do not need to move to the Himalayas and meditate on your sins and come back wiser. S**t happens.

Frame the problem. From being an unknown, it becomes well defined.

Now, solve it.

True discipline is remembering and recovering - inventing if necessary - what interests you. If it doesn't interest you, how could it possibly interest anyone else?— Verlyn Klinkenborg

A great rule for what to write about. A great rule for what to work on. A great rule for what kinda work I should be doing in my company.

So many books to read. So many authors and books that I have never heard about. Previously, I used to get overwhelmed by it. Now, I am just excited. There's an endless treasure trove that I can dive into for the rest of my life.

If that's not the best news in the world, I don't know what is.

The Key Ingredient to a Great Training Session

On Thursday, I had one of those training sessions.

My brain stayed out of it. I did not struggle to focus, nor did I try to stay in the present moment. I did. Producing movement quality and grace and precision that was way above my normal.

Exploring movements that I do all the time but from a different focal point, I found myself learning and connecting.

All with the overwhelming sensation of getting something right.

Laundry list

This does not happen often. A handful of times a year, if I am lucky.

Most often, I find myself trying too hard to make things happen.

Giving myself a laundry list of instructions. The never-ending list that keeps growing, instead of shrinking, as I read and analyse more and more. Note to self: Distil. Don't enumerate.

Matrix

Like Neo, I find myself searching for something. Something behind the curtain. Just over there. Right there.

That feeling of feeling the thrusters fly up that one fateful day under Kelly's watchful eyes.

That feeling of jumping down the track and hitting my first ball of an innings for four (wherever did that come from?!?)

It exists. I've felt it. Bypassing my thinking, my brain and its set of instructions and DOs and DONTs.

It surfaces occasionally. At work. And in training sessions. I find the smaller universe of training to be my perfect sandbox. If I can understand it here, I can take it over there. There being life or work or whatever the larger universe is.

Chatter

Even as I am engrossed and exploring this state of body and mind, mundane thoughts floated in.

When is dinner?

Should I be writing something down?

How long has it been? If it is 30 minutes, you can cap it. Right?

Normally, there are two outcomes from here. One, I listen to the thought. Two, I berate myself for having the thought. Lo and behold, a miracle happened. Instead, I just focused on one relaxed, long inhale-exhale and went back to what I was doing.

After I finished my training session, I spent the next 15 minutes writing thoughts and emotions down in my training journal.

A feeling of joy, of amazement, and one of "yep!"

But they were also crowded by "What are you going to do about it?" and "How can you ensure you always train this way" and "Can you make a routine out of this?"

Platypus

I ruin things by over-thinking.

I had a great training session.

Yes, it would be wonderful to have my brain shut up and to have this more of this altered state of training.

But even if it never ever happens again, I still had an amazing experience.

I understand that it is not zero or one. There are days when my body feels like a duck-billed platypus. And then there are these kinda days.

I think it is possible to have more days like this. Until I remind myself to stop thinking. To stop trying.

Whatever my mind and body have learned from that experience, my brain thankfully doesn't really understand and won't meddle with it. One hopes.

A question

What are you overthinking?

Find something small and specific. Not something large and life-encompassing.

Thanks for spending a few minutes with me. If you enjoyed one of these, do share and spread the word.

Three things for today,

* a post that was hard to hit publish on. Includes a bit of profanity, so if that’s not your thing, skip this one.

* 3 quotes, featuring Bruce Lee and Derek Sivers.

* when do you rebel? And when do you follow the rules? And the golden rule that has served me rather well.

the villain and the hero

This was a hard post to hit publish on. The first hour after hitting publish, I had the most intense sense of discomfort. The kind that comes up when you know you are intolerant to gluten but just ate 7 parottas. But all over the body.

There’s a reasonable amount of profanity if that kinda stuff bothers you. And self-indulgence or opening up, however, you wanna see it.

I’ve had people check in on me, asking if I am okay, after reading this. (Thank you, and yes, I am.) I’ve had quite a few write back saying it resonated deeply.

An ass for a friend

Most of the time, I am an ass to myself. The amount of criticism, the self-doubt, the analysis paralysis - sheesh, it is overwhelming. If a friend did that to me, I would stop being friends with that ass****.

At other times, it seems I am busy deflecting blame away from me. Why didn't I do this chore on time? Or why did I not finish that project at work well? Oh, I was too busy with those 17 other things and it is not my fault. Yeah, not my fault for not planning my day well, or for figuring out the difference between urgent and important, or for figuring out what the deliverable is.

K-FKD radio

When I distance myself from the chatter or the K-FKD radio, as Anne Lamott calls it, I realise the obvious. My work is not as terrible as I make it out to be. I am not that terrible a human being as self-criticism says. At the same time, I am at fault for dropping the ball all those times.

When I am able to remove the nonsense, the chatter and deconstruct things, I make progress. I stop beating myself up, I make a plan for improvement and most times, proceed with the plan. And other times, I f**k up and don't follow the plan. Life comes and I forget that I need to follow the plan and I find myself swept away.

The villain

It never is as bad as it seems. It never is as good as it seems.

I am the villain in a lot of other people's stories. Deservedly so. I was an extra-ripe ass**** in my teens and early 20s. In most of these stories, I am oblivious I am the villain.

But to let that linger sucks. It is unhealthy. I know it. But yet, how do you shut up that annoying voice which is sometimes unfortunately true? Or at least knows to say the exact thing that cuts deep?

One rep at a time

I wish I knew. I don't.

So, I plod along. One rep at a time. Taking heart from good conversations, from good interactions, from positive vibes. From trying to make meaning in my life and other's lives. From purpose.

No real point to this post

I need to learn to move on from many past mistakes. It is a stone around my neck that I keep thinking I've cut the rope on but a week or a year later, there that f****r is. Still hanging on.

Kamal Ravikant had a neat ritual, which I am yet to try. Write a note and toss it away. Or burn it. Dump everything out.

It is already August. The stuff that I said I'd do in March is on top of my ever-growing Pending list. All this keeps adding up.

The advice is easy - treat yourself like you’d treat your best friend. Sure. Simple. But doing it is another matter altogether.

How do you draw the line between confidence and arrogance? How do you draw the line between pushing yourself and being an ass**** to yourself? And fooling yourself vs forgiving yourself?

The criticism about my work seems valid. I mean, is this a post that I should actually hit publish on?!?! What the f*** have I written?

One presumes everyone's similarly fucked in the head. Or is it only me?

3 quotes

On what is fear: Non-acceptance of uncertainty. If we accept that uncertainty, it becomes an adventure!– Rumi

A lot of us get freaked out by ambiguity and uncertainty. But a lot of things will always be uncertain. Even the best-laid plans go awry. One can never account for all variables in the system, or expect variables to behave the expected way.

What are we losing out on when we try to replace ambiguity, just to feel comfortable?

Thanks to AR for sending this across!

One must not merely copy but try to convey the significance of what you see.– Bruce Lee

This one is hard but rewarding. When I read something, my first instinct is to nod along or reject the idea. Nowadays, I try to calm myself. Remind me that I don't need to have an opinion. And that no one is waiting for me to pass judgment on it. Breaking that piece down - understanding the context it was created in, seeing the larger significance of it, understanding why it hits me that way, and then contextualising it for me.  

The problem is taking any one person’s advice too seriously. Ideally, asking advice should be like echolocation. Bounce ideas off of all of your surroundings, and listen to all the echoes to get the whole picture.Ultimately, only you know what to do, based on all the feedback you’ve received and all your personal nuances that no one else knows.– Derek Sivers

As someone who makes a living guiding people, this is something I probably need to add as a postscript. As a coach, maybe you expect me to carry you from here to there. But I think I can merely point the way and maybe sit on the bus with you. And occasionally jolt you awake or whatever the correct way to continue that analogy is.

You can read the entire article here.

break the rules aka rebels are awesome

But why?

Asking why was a life-changing moment for me. As I am sure it was for you. Until my first 'why?', I did what my elders said. But as the constant "Don't do this" started to cramp my style, I erupted.

"Don't play in the afternoon" was probably the first why. I get it, today. Spending a few hours under the sun drains me but as a kid, we were invincible. But the adult mentality cramps the kid and enforces a rule (yes yes, heat and all that. Shut up, oldie!).

Sitting in the house beyond a point got too boring. I loved to read. I had a computer to play games on (a big deal in the early 90s). But nothing could beat playing outside. And so, out popped my first why.

The rebel

I questioned everything. I rebelled against anything I can think of. Out of a combination of laziness, sheer obstinacy, and not wanting to do anything I did not want to do.

Unfortunately, the power got to me. I rebelled too much. I didn't understand anything. But asking why and being a dick got me out of going to the temple (time spent away from playing), from eating vegetables (uggghhh), from bathing (time spent away from playing, plus I am gonna get dirty within minutes). It also made me a poor student as I lost sight of learning vs the game of school where you score marks.

You could've gotten me to do anything by applying a bit of reverse psychology. You tell me not to do something and sure as hell, that's what I would do.

Rebelling and breaking the rules, it seems, brought only good things. Plus, words like "thinking out of the box" get thrown about which further massage the ego.

No constraints, no rules

Unfortunately, I started to pay the price only after I got a bit older. I had not grasped the rules of the game to keep breaking them. Being disrespectful to the game is very different from breaking/bending the rules after understanding them. To quote someone who says this a lot better here's Jordan Peterson

... the careless demolition of tradition is the invitation to the (re)emergence of chaos. When ignorance destroys culture, monsters will emerge.

Ignorance - check. Careless - check. I bulldozed my way across many things without paying heed to them. Without constraints, I had no map. When everything is an option, nothing is an option.

But hey, if it meant I could get to do whatever short-sighted bauble I had in my sights, it was great.

Eventually

I saw the error of my ways. And I veered quite a bit to the other side. Not that I had ever completely gone away from it. There was a part of me that was all for rules. And a part of me that kept trying to get out of or break all of them.

For example, in the world of strength & conditioning, I am the guy who follows the textbook. To the letter. The hardest part, which I got right, was to identify people and philosophies that touched something deep in me. After that, an even smarter thing I did was to follow the words, even if I did not understand them.

For example, it took me three attempts following Coach Dan John's Easy Strength programme to get it more or less right. Three attempts at the 10,000 swing challenge as well. Pavel's training plans are a tad easier to follow - they have a lot more of "Do This!" where I try to do just that.

Along the way, by not trying to outsmart what's written down, by not following any shortcuts, by putting in the effort while navigating through life - that's when the lightbulbs started going off.

Even today, there are quite a few things that I re-learn when I re-read my favourite authors. The golden rule I have which serves me well is to "do now, understand later."

follow the rules until you are capable of being a shining exemplar of what they represent, but break them when those very rules now constitute the most dire impediment to the embodiment of their central virtues.

And after about 10 years of this, I have started to think about breaking a rule here or there. But then, this assumes I've understood the rules.

An exercise for you

What rules do you follow which you should contemplate breaking?

What rules are you breaking without understanding them?

Thanks for reading/listening. I’ll see you next week.

Hope your weekend is going well.

Three things for today.

* is sitting the new smoking? or just click-bait nonsense?

* 3 quotes, featuring Pressfield and Bruce Lee.

* 3 clarifications I needed to write on my earlier articles, as I realise I am not as clear as I think I am.

#1 is sitting the new smoking?

do we sit too much?

This makes the assumption that the hunter-gatherer, our forefathers, were constantly active and didn't sit much. Is that why they were lean and healthy? Is that why we are suffering from poor posture?

The reason this question is being asked is that we do sit a lot. From school, we are trained to sit and plod at something. School becomes college becomes a work desk. And 6 hours becomes 8 becomes 10. And with binge-watching, extended work hours - half our lives seems to be spent sitting.

And vaguely, adult health seems to be rather abysmal. Posture is poor. We don't feel vibrant and youthful much. Instead, we tend to have a lot of niggles and aches and pains.

verify the assumption. reframe the problem.

Let's look at the assumption that the hunter-gatherers didn't sit much. They actually sat around quite a bit. Maybe not as much as the modern work-desk human but closer to that than to zero. But it is the other part that differentiates us from them - they peppered their day with lots of light activity, had a couple of hours of moderate activity and a few minutes of intense activity. For example, chopping wood, carrying water, prepping the food etc. And they were done in different seated postures, including a lot of squatting. But never for too long a stretch.

When we frame the problem differently - not as sitting too much but (a) being inactive and (b) sitting for an extended period at a stretch - we can sort this problem out. That's one.

What about the poor posture that we have? Isn't being hunched over with a rounded upper back and rounded lower back the cause for all neck pain and back pain and tightness? Again, the problem seems to be (in addition to the 2 named above) weak muscles in the first place. When we do not have strong back muscles, coupled with habitually sitting in a poor posture, our muscles become weak AND tight. So, the third bit of this issue can be framed as (c) not enough strength and/or resilient muscles, which are unable to counter the sitting.

what can you do about it?

* Have a timer for 25 minutes. Whenever the timer goes, get up, walk around. Maybe stretch one muscle. Say a calf stretch. Next time the beeper goes, the other calf. Or do some rocking. Or neck nods. The list is endless. Take 30-60 seconds and just do something that breaks up the sitting.

* build enough mobility i.e. can your joints express themselves fully? Or to use less jargon, can you squat freely and without pain?

* build some strength i.e. strengthen your glutes, your back, your core and all that jazz.

* have a hobby that involves moving about and being moderately active. Gardening, for example. Or doubles badminton.

* have one bout of intense activity daily or at least every other day. A 30-minute strength and conditioning session, for example. This and #3 can obviously be the same.

Breaking up the extended sitting with little bits of a simple activity, having enough mobility and strength, having some intense activity, and having longer bouts of moderate activity - that's a good solution to get out of the drawbacks of our cultural issue today. Because this is the world we live in and unless our life adapts around it, we will invariably blame sitting too much.

Instead, fix it. Fix your routine. Fix your habits. You don't need to do anything dramatic. Start small.

#2: 3 quotes

There's no mystery to turning pro. It's a decision brought about by an act of will. We make up our mind to view ourselves as pros and we do it. Simple as that.– Steven Pressfield

Pressfield talks about being an amateur vs being a pro. And how it is as simple as flipping a switch in our heads about how we think of ourselves. And of course, the actions to follow.

As much as I've been reading and writing about these things for the past year, I am nowhere close to exhibiting any of these comprehensively. But I have gotten more reps in the past 12 months than in the previous 12 months. Maybe that's what it is? Or not. I don't know. But that doesn't mean I can sit around and wait for divine intervention and enlightenment.

If you think a thing is impossible, you'll make it impossible. Pessimism blunts the tools you need to succeed.– Bruce Lee

How does one differentiate between blind faith and pessimism? How does one have the confidence to push through, or when to call it quits?

Sound thinkingis to listen well and chooseone course of action.– Heraclitus

For a chronic over-thinker like me, the standout advice here is to pick one course of action. And then, remove pessimism. And keep chugging along. Confusion reigns when I second-guess and when I don't make a decision, even after all the facts are assembled. Then, it is simply about making a call. No amount of wishing for it to be the right call will make that happen. Only one way to find out - by making it happen.

#3A: on absolute strength and is it unnecessary

The younger you are (let's say if you are not yet 30 years old), the more relevant getting as strong as you can is. Your body recovers faster, you have a lot more time on your hands, and you are still at the peak of your physical and mental conditioning and can push yourself. In my post about kettlebells, if I sounded like I discouraged you from lifting heavy, that was not my intent or my stance at all. It all depends on who you are, how old you are, and what your goal is.

If you are under-30, you have time on your side. You can spend a couple of years with barbells, and getting as strong as you can. And then move to kettlebells for a couple of years. And then callisthenics for a couple. While one can definitely mix-and-match, if I were to offer advice to my younger self, I'd recommend focusing on skill work on one tool and getting decent at it and then playing with something else.

These are all skills you can play around with for the rest of your life. And the stronger you are, the better.

As Coach Dan John says, there are a lot of 8 weeks in your life. Don't keep jumping goals - focus, nail one. Then, move on to the next.

#3B: but how much strength do you actually need?

For health and longevity, not too much. Strength, lifting, or most forms of physical endeavour are just games that entertain us. Mastery is a worthwhile path that grows us physically, mentally, and spiritually. But you can pick many things to try and master. Lifting weights is just one option. While the numbers I talk about can simultaneously be seen as "Woah, that's unnecessary" and "umm, that's not much", it depends on your perspective. Strength is a skill and the longer you work at it, the stronger you will get.

But if your goals are simply to avoid muscle loss in old age, to be resilient, to be able to do household activities, to be able to lug your back and go on long walks and be healthy - you don't need to get anywhere close to the loads that are lifted at the gym.

StrongEnough might be the upper limits and in all probability, even that might be unnecessary. It all depends on your goal and long-term outlook.

#3C: on standing desks

I've had a standing desk for the better part of the last decade. I tend to sit lesser than the average adult (in my friends and family, personal observation only) and generally walk around or fidget a bit too much.

In the sitting article, you should've seen that the harm comes not from sitting but a combination of sitting for extended periods at a stretch and the lack of activity that we do over the course of a day.

A standing desk does not solve either. While you might sit lesser, standing in the same spot while moving less is NOT a solution. Instead of tight hips, you will have tight calves or whatever, from all the standing.

So, before you ditch your work desk and get a standing desk, remember that the point is to break up the sitting or standing and throw in a bit of moving about. Even if it is as little as 60 seconds every 30 minutes.

My favourite method is the Pomodoro - set a timer for 25 minutes. And take a break for 5 minutes, during which I, unfortunately, waste time on Reddit. But when my brain works, instead I do some stretches or a few quick resets.

Thanks for reading! Do write to me if you have any feedback or thoughts you’d like to share.

Hope your Sunday is going swimmingly well. My weekend is going great. We got a chance to hang out with a bunch of friends last night and eat great pizza. And play with some new dogs. Makes for a perfect night. Plus, lots of cake.

So, on to the 3 things for today

* why are kettlebells the primary tool of choice in my training, and why did we pick them 10 years ago for The Quad? At a time when bells were not even around in India?

* 3 quotes, as always.

* And understanding yourself, your guilt pattern (and others) and how you can get out of them by simply seeing them.

Let’s get on with it.

why kettlebells?

but we are barbell people

At The Quad, our primary tool of choice to provide General Physical Preparation is kettlebells. 10 years ago, it was near impossible to find anyone who had used kettlebells in the country, let alone find a provider for it. And yet, that's the tool we plumped for - because it was the best tool for the job.

Even though our (Raj and me) background was in barbells, we took a conscious call to put personal biases aside and become kettlebell experts. Last month, we wrote about this choice in our monthly newsletter to The Quad community and I thought I'd re-share that post with one extra bit of commentary.

The back squat, the bench and military press, the deadlift along with pull-ups and power cleans - that was pretty much the entirety of our lifting for a couple of years. Why? Because after a stint with CrossFit, what we both realised was we were lacking in one simple attribute - strength. And to build strength, the best tool is the barbell. For absolute strength, nothing else comes close. Armed with copies of Starting Strength, we set about getting our numbers up.

Before we go into 7 reasons why we picked kettlebells over other tools, let's digress to a small story.

Daedalus and Icarus

You know this story, mostly. Daedalus was a master craftsman who built wings for himself and his son, Icarus, to fly and escape the island of Crete where they were kept. Using feathers and wax, he developed a pair of wings and had not 1 but 2 instructions for his son.

* Do not fly too high. You will get too close to the sun, which will melt the wax. You already know this. This is what Icarus did.

* Do not fly too low. The waves and the water will get to the contraption.

Which leaves the middle way.

Not too high, not too low.

Not too heavy, not too light.

That's kettlebells.

Yes, you can go pretty heavy - try pressing a 32 kg bell. But you don't need to. You can do a lot of interesting things by greasing the groove with a 24 kg bell and see a ton of benefits, without the worry of extra recovery or slapping yourself and working up the mind and body to lift really heavy.

By just sticking to the middle way, the 70-80% zone, you can continue to make gains. While this applies to load in any tool (including barbells), it is too easy to want to fly too high with barbells. And with machines, it is too easy to fly too low.

The middle way, the Goldilocks zone, the just right - that's the kettlebell universe.

Here are a few reasons why we chose KBs over other tools.

#1 Do we need to go THAT heavy? While we need to lift heavy weights, we don't need to go THAT heavy. Learning to deadlift more than twice your body weight, for example, is a good goal and demonstrates solid strength. But for most of us who are just getting into this for general fitness, we don't need to go that heavy. And we definitely do not need to go that heavy, to begin with.

But if there is any gap in the kettlebell universe, it would be the lack of a heavy deadlift. That said, heavy double kettlebell cleans go a long way in sorting that problem. For example, I weigh about 64 kgs. Deadlifting 130 kgs vs cleaning the 2x 32 kg kettlebells, I find the deadlift easier than the clean at those weights.

#2 You aren't sleeping enough to lift that heavy!: The heavier we lift, the more recovery one will need. Given that sleep is a luxury in modern life, barbells and heavy lifting would leave one more beat up than stronger.

#3 Kettlebell ballistics: Here is where the kettlebell stands out. While you can practice Olympic lifting with a barbell, the technical nature of those lifts are phenomenally high. Compared to that, teaching the kettlebell swing to someone who has a solid deadlift is something we've done with 1000s of people in a few sessions.

Kettlebell swings, cleans, snatches, the clean and jerk, the push press - the primary kettlebell ballistics that you'd use are outstanding and deliver (about) the same benefits as what the O-lifts can do.

F = m.a. Force is mass times acceleration. Some chappie named Newton mentions this in passing. What can we make of this?

Strength = the force you can produce. So, you can lift a real heavy weight slowly. Or you can lift a moderate weight with a lot more speed. And generate pretty darn good force.

That's what the kettlebell swing does. Using a force plate, Pavel and Dr Stu McGill have found that swinging a 24 kg kettlebell generates about the same force as deadlifting a much heavier weight (>130 kgs).

The kettlebell ballistics really deliver because you can still go reasonably heavy but at the same time, do it at incredible speed (much faster than O-lifts, because the O-lifts are much heavier).

#4 The W-T-H effect: The crazy thing with KBs is what is called as the What the Heck effect. Even when measured scientifically, the work done, the power output, the training volume and all that - the results delivered by kettlebell training always seems to be MORE than expected. Doing 100 kettlebell swings well a few times a week, for example, might be all you need to keep your endurance levels up and even improve your 5k time.

From fat loss to improved strength while doing minimal strength work, to increased agility, to better breathing, to drastic increases in endurance - the kettlebell continues to confound by delivering more.

#5 One bell for the job: For most training sessions, one bell will fit exactly what you need. For a strong woman, for example, a 24 kg bell is the answer for a heavy training day. And a 12 kg is the answer for a light training day. We don't need to worry about 0.5 kilo and 1-kilo improvements.

What many touts as the advantage of barbells (micro-improvements) is also the advantage of the kettlebell. You don't worry about all those decisions. If you think deep, you will realise there's one perfect kettlebell for today - for the training session and based on how you are feeling.

#6: barbells vs kettlebells vs dumbbells: Everything a dumbbell can do, a kettlebell can do. Plus, there is ballistics with a kettlebell. So, that's simple.

Barbells vs KBs is a bit harder. But knowing what we wanted to coach and offer - GPP - meant there was only one clear winner.

#7 Why not have both? Choices.

For 90% of you, the kettlebell is ample. It answers every question you might have about fitness and GPP (General Physical Preparation).

Choices can sometimes cripple us.

Too many choices is not a good thing.

We picked kettlebells because they are the best Swiss Army knife out there.

in conclusion

So, no barbells ever?!? If you've been training (with us/KBs) for a few years, are StrongEnough and/or have hit benchmarks that Pavel or Dan John have specified - you can totally explore that world.

But if you know what you are doing with a kettlebell, you probably do not need much else.

3 quotes

Start to stop doing what you know to be wrong. Start stopping today. Don't waste time questioning how you know that what you're doing is wrong, if you are certain that it is. Inopportune questioning can confuse, without enlightening, as well as deflecting you from action. You can know that something is wrong or right without knowing why. Your entire Being can tell you something that you can neither explain nor articulate. Every person is too complex to know themselves completely, and we all contain wisdom that we cannot comprehend.– Jordan Peterson

Simple, powerful advice. I am one of those people who spend a bit too much time questioning and analysing and listening to chatter in my head. Sure, there are complex things that do require more thought. But starting with simple stuff that we know to be wrong does not require any thought.

For example, opening or switching to another browser tab as I write this post is wrong. I don't need to do any more research - opening a tab is just procrastination. I certainly do not need to open Reddit and waste time, allowing my brain to percolate (a glorified way of saying I waste time uselessly.)

There are tons of small things like this where I can start.

Most times, my gut tells me things that my brain does not understand. It takes months, if not years. While I cannot jump blindly with my gut in many instances, learning to pay a lot more attention to it than my thought process (which always over-complicates things) has been a huge learning for me over the years.

You have a mind?– Yes.Well, why not use it? Isn't that all you want - for it to do its job?– Marcus Aurelius

This is one of the most recommended books out there, and it is easy to see why. The honesty, the earnestness, the humility with which Marcus Aurelius writes is mind-blowing. This guy was the emperor of the Roman empire and his journal reveals his inner struggles and thought processes.

The amateur believes that, before she can act, she must receive permission from some Omnipotent Other - a lover or spouse, a parent, a boss, a figure of authority.– Steven Pressfield

Following on the first quote, over-thinking and waiting for a sign before doing something, or having a larger goal to do something is nonsense. I wasted years before re-starting writing on my blog because I was not sure what I wanted to write about, who I wanted to write for, or what goals (how many people to reach) I should set.

Finally, one fine day, I just started writing. I still do not have answers to most of those questions. But come Mon/Wed/Sunday, I write a post. One small step towards something.

What are you waiting for?

the guilt pattern

our moody dog

Our dog is a rescue, a mongrel from the streets.

Scrapping for food and survival on the streets, she’s developed a few behaviours. The first few months of living with us, she’d growl and bark at us whenever we would feed her. Food aggression is common amongst dogs and who knows what trauma she's been through. Over the many days we’ve had her, my wife has worked on training her and this has mellowed her down.

But even today, after almost 2 years, any time delay giving her food, she gets a little wonky. She gets hangry. She barks, and she turns into a different personality. She behaves like a complete ass and anyone besides me and my wife, if present in the house, are harassed a bit.

not the dog's fault

At the start, we didn’t realise this was coz of her getting hangry. But by slowly getting into a routine - walking her by 4 pm, and feeding her by 5 pm, we realised that it made her feel more chill. Predictable food and timely food calmed her down.

She plays with us a lot more and is better behaved. Whatever trauma the dog has, there are simple workarounds to tell her she’s loved and doesn’t need to fight for her food anymore. It is only when we miss the schedule, or we expect different behaviour or tell her “we aren’t gonna eat your food” and nonsense and expect her to understand.

Initially, we'd get angry and yell at her when she would behave like this. From telling her, as if she understands, that we are not going to eat her food to just being annoyed with her, we did stupid things as well. This is something deep-rooted in her, and this is not the sensible way to help her out of it or avoid this situation.

This is simply a pattern that keeps repeating.

Feed her on time or early, after tiring her out = a happy dog.

Delay her food = activate her food aggression and trauma = a hangry dog.

funny how this applies to all of us

Just like our dogs, all of us are pattern machines. You press one button and we exhibit a series of behaviours. You press another, and a different set of actions and behaviours. You think you are unique but think about how predictable you really are.

And you can use this to your advantage. Just like the simple routine tweak for our dog, you can find your triggers and avoid them when possible. And lean into them at other times.

some patterns you might have

I'll use a couple of common examples I hear from my students, and from my personal experience.

One is cravings. You are mulling about, a bit bored and you keep opening the fridge. And before you know it, you've munched on a bunch of things without meaning to or actively taken a decision on.

Another is going to a party with the intent of not drinking and being convinced to drink and chill.

Or not planning on a treat day but ending up with eating a bunch of things you feel you shouldn't have.

Most of these happen when we are on a strict diet and when our diets and our lives don't dovetail well. Of course, if every night is a social night, you will need to learn to be social without drinking or eating pizza or whatever. But you don't need to skip every night. You don't even need to skip every night for a few weeks at a stretch.

Instead, analyse when things go poorly. You put yourself into a box and in a situation that's uncomfortable without making your peace with it. You are going out to meet your friends but aren't going to drink, coz that's in line with your goals. Great! You are going to drive, and so you don't drink or stop with one. That's simple.

Or you aren't sure. You kinda wanna drink but you are trying to lose weight again. Well, see how often you "break" your rules. Too much = shut up and follow the plan. Or you get too frustrated too often, then lean into it. Have a better week overall and just chill the f**k out and have a good time with your friends.

get out of the guilt pattern

Do you get cravings every time you diet? Well, maybe not such a strict diet then. But a slightly relaxed version. Instead of 4 weeks of no sugar, how about 12 weeks of sugar once a week?

Figure out your patterns. Do something slightly different. Don't fight them.

If it means not meeting or socialising for 5 days and then meeting them and not worrying about it, it is what it is

If it means getting your protein and veggies before stepping out, that’s what it is

And when you fail to follow the plan, don’t get frustrated. that’s a pattern you can get out of - the guilt, the blame, the annoyance. Instead, just eat the cake, and chill and go to the “happy, enjoying the day” pattern.

Like my dog getting hangry, a pattern you can get out of is this guilt and beating yourself up. Start there. You'll go places.

Thanks for reading. I truly appreciate it. Until next weekend - you have a great one.

Are you watching the Olympics? I caught some of the track and field events that happened yesterday but have missed out on a lot of it. Thankfully, YouTube and other things exist to catch up on a few events. But over the past few years, I’ve realised that I am cutting back on things because it is just impossible to keep track of.

As a kid, I used to know the entire squads of every cricket and football team, along with some 5 other sports. Today, I don’t recognise Top 10 athletes in most sports and I don’t feel left out either. Feels strange though.

Anyways, let’s talk about why we are here - the 3 things I have for this week are

* being wheeled into surgery and listening to banal stuff.

* 3 quotes, features N K Jemisin.

* Do you know what game you are playing? If not, then unhappiness will ensue for all involved.

being wheeled into surgery

9 years ago, as I was wheeled into surgery (tore my ACL), I was pretty nervous. Getting surgery, any kinda surgery is a big deal.

So, there I am, being wheeled in. And in my head, THIS is all that exists. Everything in my universe is now about me, my knee, my ACL. And this is what everyone is thinking about all the time, right?! Well, at least at the hospital.

There are two people in scrubs, setting things up. They say hi and then proceed to disregard me completely while focusing on what they are doing. In my head, I am thinking "Great! Focus on your work." And then I hear them. Talk about the latest movie they saw (and didn't like). About what they ate last night. About lunch at the hospital earlier in the afternoon.

I couldn't believe it. Here I am, in this serious surgery and YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT LUNCH!?!!?!?! We need some serious people in here with complete focus.

Internal tantrums passed. The surgery got done.

routine. or not.

Months later, and even now, years later, I remember this incident. And my irrational expectation then. Lying on that table, I didn't realise it was irrational. This was my first time and this was the biggest deal in my life at that time.

To the two attendants over there, this was routine. This was mundane. This was regular work stuff. Something they did multiple times a day, week on week, and month on month.

I am sure you've had this kinda reaction, well maybe a lot muted, but similar nonetheless. When you met your doctor, convinced you had something serious only for them to be rather dismissive. Or the other time when you were armed with serious Google research and they didn't even bother answering your questions and just gave you a couple of pills and sent you on your way. Of course, those pills did their job and all was actually simple. But still...

perspective

As I discussed in my previous post, our universe expands periodically. Big events of yesterday are mundane events of today. When ours overlaps with a different one, we expect the order or layering or importance of events to be the same across both. But of course, that's not true.

But what if in every encounter with a student, I did treat it from their perspective? Sure, I might have heard that question a thousand times before. Yes, I might have had that unreasonable and impossible want said to me by someone at least once a week for the past 10 years. By looking at it from their point of view, by switching my lens out for those couple of minutes, I will be able to empathise with them better. Yes, my answer is always going to be that you should NOT try to lose that much and I specifically will not be able to help them with it (but there are others who can.) That still doesn't mean anything changes with my answer but I don't need to try and solve the problem, or worse, explain to them why they are wrong. They aren't wrong. Their universe is currently different from mine. In their universe, this is the current priority.

As we meander and make forward progress, as we become experts in our own ways, we will find better solutions to the same problems. From crash diets to healthy eating and a sustainable lifestyle is a journey each one takes at their own pace, and arrives at different specifics even if the general direction is the same.

Defining the problem well, and defining the universe/environment the problem is in currently will lead to the solution. Shifting perspectives will help me understand them better. Shifting environments and guiding them along that path will help them understand themselves better.

3 quotes for this week

Live as if you were living already for the second time, and as though you had acted the first time as wrongly as you are about to act now!– Dr Viktor Frankl

Self-analysis is a powerful tool. To assume that what you are about to do is a mistake allows you to think a little deeper, peel a few more layers. If one has the capacity to pause between stimulus and response.

When a slave rebels, it is nothing much to the people who read about it later. Just thin words on thinner paper worn finer by the friction of history.– N K Jemisin

We have become reactive to the competitive landscape, rather than responsive to the needs of our communities—those people we hope to serve. We are so focused on the competition, or even the threat of it, that we’ve forgotten to double down on what makes us and our work unique and valuable.– Bernadette Jiwa

As The Quad nears the 10-year mark, I can see how my thinking has slipped up for a few years in between. In becoming reactive, and losing sight of what I am and what is unique about what I do. And in turn, what is unique about the Quad Squad and the work we are doing. A weekly slap in the face is mandatory for me.

What is the game you are playing? Do you know?

what is your (next) goal?

Are you looking to lose weight to look good for your wedding in 6 weeks? Are you looking to flaunt 6-pack abs at the beach? Are you wanting to lose weight to improve your health? To keep your diabetes under control? To ensure obesity or high blood pressure is not something you need to see the doctor about but take control?

Determining your (next) goal is vital to pick the method. If you want to lose weight for your wedding, then listening to me talk about sustainable eating and sensible training is NOT the game to play. But if you are keen on long-term health, on learning (and continuing to master) a skill, then we are on the same wavelength and can continue interacting.

unable to walk up flights of stairs or tie your laces

The realisation that you need to do something about your health and fitness comes about. The murmur of it has been going around at the back of your head for a while. You've ignored it until you hit rock bottom.

Rock bottom varies for each of us. For someone who played sport all the time in school, being unable to walk up a few flights of stairs might be the realisation they need. For someone who did yoga, being unable to tie their shoelaces might be a sucky feeling.

Hitting rock bottom is not that bad a thing. Because now you will take action.

choices

The urge to fix things immediately, to fix them right now can cause you to make poor decisions. But that drive is also the fuel you need for escape velocity - to make a running start. That's why most things will work if you are starting off. As Coach Dan John says, most things work for 6 weeks. You can use that to your advantage - do it for at least 6 weeks. And during this time, figure out your next step.

It is tempting to figure out 10 next steps but don't. Figure out the next best step. All of us will come to the realisation that long-term health and General Physical Preparation is a great path to go towards. But until then, what do you do?

Make a choice.

bad choices vs not so bad choices

Elimination diets, fad diets, drastic amounts of lifting or running - all of them do sound like bad choices. As long as you are not going to do long-term physical harm to yourself, don't overthink it.

Unfortunately, we do not know if they are bad choices or not. Even if you hire a coach, unless you buy in and align on the way forward, it will not lead to progress. A good choice can still be a bad choice - because it is not the right one for you at this moment.

But there are terrible choices and you need to avoid them. If you won't ask your mom to do it, don't do it. Let's start there, by eliminating the most stupid ones.

A lot of issues occur because we listen to people playing different games than us.

you will evolve

Some people, and I have encountered many students, start off a lot more enlightened and smarter than I did. They join us, clear about the long-term. They train, learn skills, and don't hurt themselves.

But most folks are similar - results now, and by any means necessary. Stay off sugar, lift weights in the morning and go running in the evening, and all that kinda stuff. It is okay. As long as you are moving in the right direction (and you need to figure that out), you will be fine.

Give yourself time to evolve. Do what you feel is apt for you today. Because you said no to something today does not mean it is not right for you tomorrow.

Today, you and your goals and intentions are different. Do what works for today.

Tomorrow, as you evolve, ideas that did not make sense will sound different. Sound right.

Give yourself time to evolve. Give yourself space and freedom to evolve. Don't tell yourself "You are this way" and contain/constrict yourself.

What is the game you are playing today?