Why I Started Looking

Those body changes, noticeably different, is where the conversation starts.

I talk about the changes I saw and felt in my body, a few years post-menopause that had me wondering. The new belly fat that had never shown up like this before (even after two kids) and a shifting gut routine. Around the same time, I got serious about my bone health, reversing my osteoporosis to osteopenia. I explain how I started running my own ‘N-of-1’ experiments, changing mostly what I ate, one variable at a time to see what impact that might have.

The CGM Experiment

I share why I chose Vively for my two-week CGM trial. An Australian option that measures and interprets glucose data, with an AI bot and a human team to ask questions of. I wanted to know and to have some support as I went along.

I talk about deliberately pushing the experiment, changing up my usual diet some days to see what impacts that had on my glucose levels. Logging sleep, exercise, and nutrition each day. That logging was important. It helped enormously to know how what I was eating and doing that lead to the glucose response in my body.

What Surprised Me

I walk through what surprised me:

* Refined carbs (bread especially) were the biggest triggers - pastries, scones, pizza even oats all spiked me, but bread was the worst offender.

* Broken sleep wrecked my nighttime glucose, pushing me straight into the red zone.

* Protein flattened my spikes — even pasta with bolognaise and parmesan was fine.

* My morning coffee with soy milk and collagen was okay for the most part too.

This is my body’s data - everyone’s results will look different.

Turning It Into Something for My GP

I talk about asking Claude.ai to condense Vively’s 31-page report of my daily data and logs into a summary version to give to my GP (General Practitioner) at my up coming annual check-up.

The report was not a tool to self-diagnose, but one to open a deeper conversation with my doctor based on my data and the patterns observed.

The Outcome: more indepth blood tests to be done that included fasting glucose + fasting insulin + HbA1c together, so we can calculate my HOMA-IR score. I’d not had that done before. Fasting insulin isn’t part of a standard Australian blood panel, so it’s an out-of-pocket add-on that’s roughly AUD$30, but I think is worth it.

Enter Dr Florence Comite

I talk about discovering endocrinologist and precision-medicine practitioner Dr Florence Comite, in a podcast conversation with Dr Vonda Wright (I follow Dr Vonda for bone health insights). Dr Comite talked about the five biomarkers every midlife woman (and man) should test for: fasting glucose, fasting insulin, HbA1c, cholesterol risk ratio, and free testosterone.

So much of what was said in that conversation made sense to me, I bought Dr Comite’s book Invincible - defy your genetic destiny to live better, longer and have devoured it from cover to cover learning much.

She also recommends her patients wear a CGM for at least 2 weeks, to gather their unique data that gives clues to their sugar metabolic health. Boom! Literally what I had just done.

The Window of Opportunity

To act and influence the tragectory of our metabolic health.

I specifically talk about a chapter in her book that really stood out for me - its chapter on Aging Pattern #1: A Disorder of Carbohydrate Metabolism.

Could this be what I’d just seen wearing my CGM?

I talk about how she writes that insulin resistance can show up decades before diabetes does. Not years, decades! So why do we wait?

Similar to my bone health journey, if I had known my status earlier, I’d be in a completely different position today. I would have made sure to strengthen my bones well before perimenopause, so the later decline wouldn't have been so detrimental.

Armed with the right information and know-how early enough, decades is a significant window of opportunity to act and influence our metabolic health for the better - for future You and Me. Why wait?

Precision Medicine & N-of-1 Medicine

I explore the concept of precision medicine, drilling into genetics, biomarkers, lifestyle and environment instead of leaning on large population averages. And N-of-1 medicine, where you’re not the average, you’re the whole study.

I raise the open question of whether this kind of more personalised care will ever be available to everyone, not just those who can afford it, in the decades to come.

What will a visit to the doctor in 10, 15, 20 years look like?

Final Thoughts

I close by reflecting on how subtle and gradual midlife changes can be, and how continuous data plus context (sleep, activity, food, timing) lets you catch the nuance instead of waiting for something to become a diagnosis.

I talk about the value of small, consistent tweaks, and the honest, open partnership I have with my own GP because we’re setting my health plan, together.

Thanks for being here.

I hope you find this episode helpful. What’s been your CGM experience or curiosity about wearing one? Let me know in an email (hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au) or comment below.

If there is someone you think might benefit from hearing it, please share this with them.

References

* Vively (CGM program, Australia): https://www.vively.com.au

* Dr Florence Comite & Dr Vonda Wright, “The 5 Biomarkers Every Midlife Woman Must Test” — The Dr Vonda Show, #156:

* Dr Florence Comite, Invincible: Defy Your Genetic Destiny to Live Better, Longer: https://www.theinvinciblebook.com

* Dr Vonda Wright: https://www.drvondawright.com

Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

She wanted to share her story with you so that if you’re also caring from someone with dementia it might give you some light in the darkness. If you are yet to care for someone with dementia, her story might shed some light on what it can be like.

Personal stories give us a richness, a door to deeper understanding. Awareness about dementia is a focus for this podcast. Sharing stories like Barb’s help to bring that in a very relatable way. Beyond the medical and research facts.

Real life. Dementia Life.

Thank you Barb for your care, your devotion and courage to speak your story for others.

Join Us As We Talk About…

Peter’s Story

Barb gives us insights into what it was like caring for her much loved husband Peter, the clues that dementia was presenting itself and how the condition progressed.

Peter was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s at 65 and lived with it until he passed away at 76. Getting that diagnosis took two years. It was Barbara’s persistence, shaped by her care of four loved ones previously with dementia, that finally got that diagnosis.

She describes the early signs, some that were easy to miss if you didn’t know what you were looking for. Barb knew. She’d seen some of them before. The many phone calls (sometimes 30 a day) Pete would make to her. The misplaced keys, forgotten meetings and the day Pete got completely lost driving a way home he was so very familiar with. That was the most confronting for Peter.

The Masking

One of the things Barb opens up about is how well Peter masked his dementia. He was very good at covering things up. His doctor couldn’t see what she could see. Colleagues at their car dealership weren’t ready to believe changes needed to be made in their business; but Barb could.

Peter himself wanted to keep it a secret, which raised the painful question, ‘how much do you share, with whom, and when?’ Balancing his dignity and wishes against the practical reality of keeping him safe. That was hard.

What Helped

Barb shares some of the things that helped with these challenges.

Reframing, not confronting. When it was time for Peter to stop driving, his doctor told him it was his eyesight that was making it unsafe for him to drive. Not dementia. Peter could accept that. He never would have accepted “you can’t drive anymore because you have dementia.” Finding the kind path to the same truth helps enormously. It maintains dignity and keeps things calmer.

Loving understanding of family and friends - it helps to keep things calm which always helps. Confrontation does not.

Keeping routines alive. Peter loved a glass of red wine and a beer. Rather than take that pleasure away, Barb switched to non-alcoholic versions. He never noticed. He was happy. (Unlike my Dad who knew! “This wine tastes sh#t.” I think it was his Italian DNA that gave him the clue. In the end, he didn’t even want it.)

Peter also kept playing table tennis almost right up until the end. A computer on a desk in his room made the space feel familiar. Small things that brought familiarity and comfort. On that computer he could see videos and photos of the family.

Patience. Patience. And More Patience. Barb talks honestly about what it takes to answer the same question as though it’s the first time, every, single, time. Easier said than done. But keeping things calm, she says, was everything.

Music. Barb shares how profoundly enjoyable and soothing music was for Peter. So much so that she did a course in how to use it therapeutically, for Peter and for others in the care facility he was eventually placed in too.

The Nature of Peter’s Care Over Time.

Barb talks about how Peter’s care changed over those 11 years. From being at home full-time, to day care growing from one day a week to four, their daughter covering another day. Eventually Peter moved in to full-time residential care for his last 15 months with his final days, his palliative care at home where he passed away.

That transition came after Barb had a serious accident and badly damaged her leg. She also opens up about the physical reality of caring for someone who has become incontinent and how that tipped the scales. It was too much to handle.

Respite care, was a turning point - 2 weeks became 3. It gave her room to breathe and recover. It helped her to see clearly that Peter was being looked after beautifully and that what she was able to do given her injury, was not as complete for him. That perspective is something you can only appreciate when circumstances change and the care you’re used to doing at home is no longer possible to do.

[Personally I have had quite a few people say to me that “I’d never put my partner in a home”. The stigma around that I find is still so very apparent, it’s hurtful. No one wants to wish or wants their loved one to be placed in a care home. To take them from a home they love being in, that you share together. That was one of the hardest days of my life, my Mum’s life, the day Dad went into full-time residential care. But after 3 stays in hospital for Mum, we couldn’t risk her health declining rapidly as well. It’s often the kindest thing to do. Doesn’t make it easy, but it’s kind. Dad was looked after so very, very well, just like Peter was].

Self-Care Is Essential

Barb talks openly about how she came to understand that taking care of herself was essential too. How self-care for her was one day a fortnight. A non-negotiable massage.

Planning Ahead — While You Still Can

One of the most valuable parts of our conversation is when Barb talks about the importance of getting ‘your ducks in a row’ early. The legals like enduring power of attorney and medical wishes. Honest conversations about end-of-life preferences while the person you love can still be part of them. In Australia, dementia patients are not eligible for voluntary assisted dying, so these decisions need to made before dementia progresses too far.

Barb also shares how she contacted the palliative care team well in advance, in line with Peter’s wishes. How that preparation made his wishes a possibility. Those last five days were at home, surrounded by family. Three households moved in. Six adults, seven grandchildren. Food, music, singing and time with Peter. Together. So very precious.

Thank you for sharing your story, Barb. And thank you for listening.

If you’re a carer right now we want you to know that we see you. It’s so very hard. It’s lonely. It’s demanding. Much of what you do goes unnoticed, is under appreciated and under-valued. You give up so much.

Our experiences though different, have similarities. We see you. We appreciate all that you do.

The light in the dark does show up at times. Hold on to those precious moments.

Got a dementia life story you’d like to share? I’d love to hear it. Email us at hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au or send me a message.

Sharing these personal stories matters.

For dementia awareness. Those who live with it. And those who care for those who do. For all of us.

Because in the not too distant future, perhaps even now, we will all know someone whose life has been touched by dementia.

If you think there is someone in your life who would find this conversation helpful, please share it with them. Dementia awareness matters. Carer awareness matters.

Thank you. See you next episode.

Anita xx

p.s. Barb vanishes in the end - the internets strikes again!

Curiosity in the Age of AI

In this episode, we explore one of the most important questions of our time: how do we stay genuinely curious and human, in a world increasingly shaped by AI?

We talk about AI as a tool. Not a replacement for us. How we interact with it, the traps we can fall into, and the choices we make about how we use it. How this determines not only the quality of what we get back and the importance of what we bring to keep the balance - our midlife skills, wisdom, and humanity.

What We Cover

An AI Recap

What do we actually mean by AI, and how might we use it day to day? We start with the basics, so everyone is up to speed.

Input and Output

The questions we ask shape the answers we get. We talk about why the quality of our prompt matters and why thinking before we type is more important than most of us realise.

The Traps

Lost in Conversation

Anita shares her own experience using AI — and how easy it is to forget we’re speaking to a technology tool, not a person. The ease, the flow, the warmth, the apparent understanding. It’s designed to feel human. And that’s how blind trust can creep in.

Bias: Building, Boosting and Bracing

When we ask questions in a way that’s more likely to return answers we’re already seeking, we’re building our own bias in. Algorithms then boost and amplify those patterns and over time, they brace them, creating fiercely protected viewpoints that block new perspectives.

We talk about how to counter this: crafting prompts that invite alternative views, ask for blind spots, and actively fact-check. The key is cognitively wrestling with what AI gives you, not merely receiving it.

Cognitive Laziness and Critical Thinking

Critical thinking is a skill. One that builds curiosity, keeps us sharp, and helps us stay discerning. It’s also a skill that can quietly erode when we outsource too much of our thinking to AI.

For younger generations (digital and AI natives) this skill may not have been built much at all. But as Midlifers, we know the world before AI and heavy technology reliance. As Digital Migrants, this gifts us with perspectives and capabilities that genuinely matter.

We look at what cognitive laziness is doing to our brain health and why this matters, drawing on fascinating research on London taxi and ambulance drivers.

Curiosity and the Art of Not Being Fooled

Being objective. Reasoned. Discerning. Self-regulated in how we engage with AI tools.

There are two very different ways to use AI:

* AI to enhance our thinking - where we do some thinking first, bring our own knowledge, map it out, and test ideas as we interact with AI

* AI as a direct output machine — where we accept the answers, no questions asked.

We talk about the research on what the second approach is doing to brain development in young people and changes in older people. It’s something we all need to be aware of.

Intuition and Emotional Intelligence

Will these deeply human capabilities rise in value as AI takes on more of the cognitive load? Will having AI do some of the thinking free up space for intuition and emotional intelligence to flourish?

Are you using your intuition when you use AI?

The Social Cost

If we stop practicing curiosity in the offline world, with each other, what does that look like over time? We talk about the role of human connection on longevity, and what’s at stake if we let connection in our communities slip away.

Privacy and De-Identifying Prompts

This matters a lot, especially in professional settings. Avoid using real names or “I” in our prompts. AI remembers your interactions and tailors its responses accordingly. Keep things hypothetical. Protect what’s personal and commercial in confidence.

Where To From Here

You’re not too old. You’re not too far behind. It is absolutely not too late.

Explore AI with curiosity. Grab the prompts from Kiki Hart’s “Are We Outsourcing Curiosity?” article here to give yourself a head start. They are bullet points in the post.

As Midlifers, we bring something genuinely valuable to this conversation: life skills, knowledge, wisdom, and the discernment that comes from living through change. We also have a real opportunity — and perhaps an obligation — to help bridge the critical thinking gaps that younger generations are navigating. That lived experience is a superpower.

Together, with curiosity, we can keep bringing the human to an AI world.

AND

If you enjoyed this episode and think this conversation would be interesting or helpful for someone in your life, please share it on. We’re all about awareness here.

Got any comments or questions? We’d love to see them? Post them below.

Coming Up

In our next chat (in about six weeks), Kiki, Louise and I will be talking about Truth and Authenticity in an AI World. We’d love for you to join us. We’ll go live, then post the recording with show notes shortly after.

See you then! If you’re not a subscriber, maybe become one so you find out when we go live and when the recording and show notes are ready.

Thanks!

Anita xx

Resources

Are We Outsourcing Curiosity - Kiki Hart

As AI gets smarter, are we getting dumber? - University of Melbourne

Navigation-related structural change in the hippocampi of taxi drivers - PubMed

Your Brain on ChatGPT: Accumulation of Cognitive Debt when Using an AI Assistant for Essay Writing Task - MIT Media Lab

AI Platforms to Explore

* ChatGPT — Day-to-day tasks and conversation

* Gemini — Google’s AI – also good for everyday use drawing on Google’s ecosystem of familiar products

* Claude — Especially good for writing and factual summarising

* Meta AI — Good for generating images and social media style queries

* Perplexity — Great for research; shows its sources clearly so you can cross-check

Tip: Each AI has a different “personality” and is optimised for different jobs. Try a few and see which one feels right for you.

Our Human experience in this live video:

We are human after all and life happens. In this chat Louise ‘disappears’ as her phone decided it was too hot a conversation and needed a minute to cool off. She also mentioned the hypothalamus and meant to say hippocampus.

Meet Kiki Hart

Kiki is a digital persona created by Louise Cooper — born from the digital world, but sharing Louise’s perspective. Around 40 years of age, she’s your guide to navigating technology without losing yourself. She observes and informs, so you can decide what to do with it. Exploring how culture, technology and modern life are reshaping identity, attention and relevance.

Follow Kiki Hart on Substack

Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

Erica and I are very excited to bring you this episode because it’s a topic that brings together many popular conversations we’ve spoken of here in the podcast, with a brilliant woman who has dedicated decades to it.

As a best-selling author, award-winning teacher and PhD researcher in women’s spirituality Megan Dalla-Camina has gathered decades of insights. Through her Women Rising platform serving over 10,000 women, in 76 countries, across many ages, stages and cultures, she’s witnessed the same threads of yearning, again and again.

More than the burnout, the endless striving, the quiet ache of disconnection. More than the roles she’s performed, the versions of herself she’s outgrown, the world that taught her she wasn’t enough.

She Who Remembers: Awakening feminine wisdom in a world ready for her return is Megan’s latest book. A sacred call to the woman who knows there is more.

We’ve been shaped by it. Perhaps unaware, perhaps feeling the full force of the push and pull of a patriarchal society that teaches us to strive, to do more, to perform. A way that is incongruent with more feminine codes of intuition, embodiment, devotion and presence. The rhythm of our cycles and seasons.

In this chat with Megan, we explore what Feminine Wisdom actually is, why so many of us have lost touch with it and why the world needs it now.

A beautifully rich conversation that explores:

The Signals. The Awakening : learning to stop and listen. To pay attention. To ask the questions needed to get clear on ‘what do I want?’

“If I asked that question and was truthful to. Myself, I would literally have to …. So we don’t. We deflect, we distract. Because it’s hard.”

The Power Of Asking The BIG Questions: how that questioning literally changes us. Something shifts inside. It can’t be undone.

“The BIG questions will keep coming back, until you answer it.”

Then What?: Because we are often afraid of what might come up…and then what? What comes next?

Who Are You At Your Core?: Megan shares a framework she uses with her clients. A framework that helps to unearth who we are, beneath all the layers.

Midlife Is An Invitation: a calling for more depth, for deeper connection with self and others. A yearning for something more – our spirituality.

Critical Space & Quiet: why it’s critically important and how to welcome in the unknown. To let the inner knowing rise.

“The quieter you get the more you hear. How quiet are you prepared to get, to hear what it is that you know?”

Learning To Trust Ourselves: the erosion of self-trust and the cost, the betrayal of abandoning ourselves. Feminine Wisdom puts you on your own side, your own ally. Megan shares four practical steps to begin rebuilding that trust.

Embodiment: our bodies know. They always have. We’ve been taught the only knowledge that matters is the rational, the linear, the cognitive. Whilst they are valuable, there is more. Megan offers simple practices to try over two days - to begin noticing, to feel it in your body before your rational mind overrides it, saying ‘no’.

We talk about the consequences of continuing to override the messaging in our body.

Women Are Exhausted and In Denial: We call it out in this honest conversation. Across cultures, across continents. What happens when we ourselves permission to acknowledge it? What choices would we make?

Why Feminine Wisdom, Why Now?: Why the world is not just ready, it’s waiting for it.

About Megan’s Latest Book:

She Who Remembers: Awakening feminine wisdom in a world ready for her return is for women navigating life transitions, midlife shifts or a quiet spiritual longing they can’t quite name. A woman like you. Like us.

I must admit, I pre-judged this book before I began to read it, wondering if it might be a bit too ‘woowoo’ for me. It certainly was not that at all. I was so very wrong. This book touched my heart, my soul. It gently reached in, took my hand and lead me home.

Not a book of instruction. A beautifully thoughtful book where every word is deliberately chosen and placed. Both Erica and I felt that as we read it. A blend of soulful storytelling, cultural reflection and spiritual insight.

With grounded practices that accompany each chapter inviting us to quiet, to listen and acknowledge. To choose. To act.

Not in an obtrusive performative way. More like a loving guiding hand that gently nudges. A comforting companion for the sacred path home to yourself.

Here is a small portion of a passage from the book for you. A passage that personally touched my heart deeply.

A Blessing for She Who Remembers

“You need only to be here. To be real. To be you. You are already the woman you’ve been waiting for. Now is the time to live your feminine wisdom. Now is the time to own your power. Now is the time for She Who Remembers.” Megan Dalla-Camina

About Megan Dalla-Camina:

Megan is a best-selling author, award-winning teacher and PhD researcher in women’s spirituality whose work is dedicated to helping women return home to themselves.

She is the founder of Women Rising, a global platform that has supported over 10,000 women in more than 70 countries. With more than two decades of experience at the intersection of women’s empowerment, leadership and spirituality. Megan’s work bridges science, spirit and sadhana, offering a deeply grounded, accessible path to Feminine Wisdom and awakening.

Before founding her own company, Megan spent 18 years as a senior executive at IBM, GE and PwC. In addition to her PhD research, she holds two master’s degrees in business and wellness/positive psychology.

Megan write a weekly column in Psychology Today with millions of readers and her work has been featured in hundreds of major media outlets worldwide.

Megan lives by the sea with her family where she writes, teaches and continues her PhD research on Feminine Wisdom, midlife identity and women’s awakening.

Where to Get The Book:

She Who Remembers: Awakening feminine wisdom in a world ready for her return is available from many major book sellers and from Megan’s online home at https://megandallacamina.com/

Connect with Megan:

On her website: https://megandallacamina.com/ where there is a wealth of resources and information. Definitely worth checking out.

On Social media: Just search for Megan Dalla-Camina. Hint…she loves Instagram.

A big thank you!

Florence Acosta, Omixintel, and many others for tuning into our live video with Megan Dalla-Camina and for being here now. We hope you enjoyed our conversation and more importantly, picked up a few inspirational gems.

If you have someone in your life you think would enjoy this conversation too, then please share it on. That would be awesome. Thank you.

See you next week for another conversation on Midlife Unfiltered.

Until then.

Anita xx

It’s thought to affect between 1 in 6 to 1 in 8 women, with a peak onset between the ages of 45 and 55.

Symptoms like fatigue, weight gain, brain fog, low mood and hair loss are routinely dismissed as just ‘life’ or perimenopause. Without a full thyroid panel that goes beyond standard TSH testing, a significant number of cases are missed entirely. Women are walking around with it, unaware.

So let’s talk about it.

Why This Chat?

I asked Jo to join me for a few reasons:

She’s fabulous. Jo will always share authentically, from the heart, believing we can all learn from each other, beyond the medical terminology. The power of personal story.

80–90% of Hashimoto’s cases are women, with peak onset at exactly the age range of the women we serve here at Midlife Unfiltered.

Too many cases go undiagnosed. We want to raise awareness of this condition to encourage women to advocate for their thyroid health.

What We Talk About In This Conversation

How Jo found out she had Hashimoto’s: including what age she was and what her life looked like at the time.

Symptoms: many of which Jo initially put down to being a busy, newly pregnant woman. Hmm. Sound familiar?

Why it gets missed: many Hashimoto’s symptoms overlap with pregnancy, postpartum and perimenopause symptoms, which masks what’s really going on underneath. That, and the lack of thorough testing to identify it.

Testing: the tests Jo underwent to get her diagnosis and what she monitors regularly now to track how well her treatment is working.

Treatment: Jo’s current regime, both medical and lifestyle.

Risk factors: including family history, which in Jo’s case is exceptionally strong. She has it on both her paternal and maternal sides. Her sisters, daughter and nephew all have thyroid disorders - a mix of Hashimoto’s, Graves’ disease and thyroid cancer.

Pregnancy and thyroid health: Jo is passionate about this one. Knowing your thyroid status before becoming pregnant matters. Complications increase when Hashimoto’s is undetected.

Associated deficiencies: Hashimoto’s often comes with key nutrient deficiencies including Vitamin D, iodine and others. Jo also experienced macrocytosis (red blood cell enlargement) which her doctor was thankfully across.

The testing gap: we talk about what’s missing in our current health system, the full thyroid panel worth advocating for, and what each test actually reveals.

What is ‘normal’ anyway?: Different labs, different ranges. Confusing? Yes. Important to know? Absolutely. Jo mentions a helpful information from the Australian Thyroid Foundation which is linked below.

Why the thyroid?: what makes it so vulnerable, and the role of environmental endocrine disruptors (EDCs) in thyroid health.

Jo’s Closing Tips

Don’t brush off your symptoms. Tune in, take action, and don’t accept being dismissed.

Know your numbers. Understanding your own results is one of the most powerful things you can do. Be thorough.

Take a whole body approach. A diagnosis is just the starting point — supporting your overall health makes a real difference.

Resources

🔗 Australian Thyroid Foundation — a brilliant resource and the peak advocate for thyroid health in Australia. Their site includes clear explanations of thyroid blood tests, what they show, and what’s considered ‘normal’: thyroidfoundation.org.au

🎙️ Endocrine Disruptors (EDCs) — catch our earlier conversation with Andrea Dahr of Switch Natural on the impact of EDCs on our bodies. [Find it here.]

🎙️ Jo Clark — find Jo and her top-ranking podcast Redefining Midlife over at Jo Clark Coaching. She is an absolute gun.

Share Your Story

Have a Hashimoto’s story of your own? Drop it in the comments below. We learn so much from each other. Real life experience adds such a rich dimension.

Found this conversation useful? Share it with someone you think would like to hear it. The more awareness we build, the better we can advocate for ourselves and each other.

See you next week on Midlife Unfiltered. 🎙️

Anita xx

Erica and I don’t know any midlife women who have not felt the weight of ‘shoulds’. In midlife especially, they feel overwhelming and heavy, as if we’re surrounded by them, with demands lobbing in from every direction.

Performance and Expectations. Self-imposed? Are they true, are they real? Have you ever stopped to ask why?

Our Bodies Are Keeping Notes

Our somatic signals are real. Our body takes in the effects of acting on so many shoulds, and eventually it starts signalling, subtly at first. The clenching jaw. Tense shoulders. Tight hands.

But our body is persistent, always looking out for us. Eventually those signals become so loud, so disruptive, we have little if any choice but to listen and change.

So why do we feel the need to push through when our body is signalling otherwise?

Lived Experience

I talk about the recent experience of a dear friend who has hit burnout and what she’s done to restore her sense of self, to find herself again. Her brave actions.

Not all change needs to be this extreme, but it is important to recognise that small acts of kindness to ourselves can be a priority. And worth asking: what are the consequences if I don’t?

The Language of Shoulds

If we drop the language of ‘should’, what else becomes available?

Noticing when we say it and how many times a day is a powerful start. If we stopped using that word, what alternatives take its place? Does it change the way we feel, react and respond?

The words that stand in its place: I want to. I desire to. I feel like I have to. Do I want the outcome? I don’t want to do this. What feels more true?

There’s something empowering that happens when ‘want’ replaces ‘should’.

The Drivers of Shoulds

The guilt. The shame. The (perceived) judgement. The learned behaviour. Societal expectations. We call the familiar ones out, based on conversations Erica has with her clinic clients.

And the influence of control — because when we are ‘shoulding’, we are seeking to control something. Not that we’d put it on others (typically), but we put it on ourselves.

Putting the brakes on automatic should-pilot is significant. Change always starts with awareness — pausing to check in when something’s not working or feeling the way we thought it would.

What Might Help

An exercise from Brené Brown’s I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t) asks us to articulate how we would and wouldn’t like to be perceived. Our unwanted identities.

Working through that highlights what we’re trying to control. For example: I don’t want to be perceived as lazy — so I’ll ‘should’ upon myself any time there’s a risk of looking that way. I’m controlling for that identity. Because a good woman isn’t just sitting around doing nothing, is she?

Aligning with our values is, yet again, invaluable here. They’re the guideposts that help us identify which shoulds we can release and let go of. What deserves our attention and when.

The Postmenopausal Gift of Less Shoulding

Giving less f*cks is real. I speak from lived experience — comparing my early-40s self (where Erica is now) to my almost-60-year-old self. Something to look forward to.

Stay Curious

Stay curious about when you should, and what you’re shoulding about. And please — stay playful with it. This isn’t something else to feel like you should think and act on perfectly (whatever that is).

Could you banish ‘should’ from your vocabulary entirely?

Resources

* Find Erica at ericawebb.com.au

* 📚 I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t) — Brené Brown

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video and for listening here! If you found it helpful — or think a friend might — please share it on. 🩶

Join us for our next live video next week. We’ll be talking about a common autoimmune condition - Hashimoto's disease. With Jo sharing her lived experience. See you then. Anita xx

There’s a group of muscles working hard for us every single day that most of us never give a second thought to, until something goes wrong.

Problems more common than you might think. Almost 4 in 10 women and 2 in 10 men experience urinary incontinence - with 7 in 10 of those people under 65. Around 1 in 30 experience bowel incontinence (Continence Health Australia).

Common? Yes. But they are not an inevitable part of aging.

Our Pelvic Floor. A rather complex group of muscles, together with fascia, ligaments, connective tissue, nerves and blood vessels. It literally holds up our bladder, bowel and for us women, our uterus, along with all their entry and exit points.

The number of times a day those organs are called upon, all supported by this one hardworking structure we rarely think about, just because it’s down there. We don’t like talking about down there much do we? Hmm. Not today!

That’s what Michelle Murphy, a pelvic physiotherapist with over 20 years of clinical experience, joins me to talk about our pelvic health - our Pelvic Floor in this very insightful and eye opening podcast chat. Michelle’s passion for helping us understand and treat pelvic floor problems absolutely shines through.

A refreshing no shame approach to a topic we really should be talking about a lot more. And so, we are.

What We Talk About In This Episode

Pelvic Floor 101 - Anatomy and Function

What even IS the Pelvic Floor? The parts that make up the Pelvic Floor, where they sit and what they do for us - literally the heavy lifting it does for us every day. Michelle also shows us with her clinical 3D model to illustrate, the complexity of this underappreciated, hard working part of our anatomy.

Common Pelvic Floor Problems & How To Know That You Have Them

The symptoms you might be experiencing that indicate that you might have Pelvic Floor Dysfunction (PDF). Problems that involve:

* Bladder - leakage, frequency, urgency

* Bowel - leakage, constipation, urgency + the Poo Chart (Bristol Stool Chart)

* Sex - pain with intercourse,

* Prolapse - what it is, why it happens, how it can feel and how common it is.

The Genitourinary Syndrome of Menopause (GSM) - what it is, causes and symptoms. The influence it has on the Pelvic Floor.

Not all problems need to be painful. But that they may hurt us in other, very real ways.

The Emotional Load of Pelvic Floor Dysfunction (PFD)

The embarrassment, shame and self-blame that so often comes with these problems - and why we need to leave them behind.

What Can Help Your Pelvic Floor

Problems may be common but that does not mean they are normal. Nor does it mean that nothing can be done to help. This is Michelle’s bread and butter as a specialist Pelvic Floor physio.

* Pelvic Floor Exercises - the first line of defense because yes, they absolutely work.

* The right exercises, done the right way, ‘dosed’ correctly and done consistently.

* To Kegel or not to Kegel? Michelle clears up the confusion.

* Knowing Your Baseline - the status of your Pelvic Floor muscles and how a Pelvic Floor Physio can assess this with you.

* The Exercise Trap - The Overactive Pelvic Floor - it’s important to strengthen but it’s equally important to know how to relax these muscles. Athletes and women who have suffered with pelvic pain may be unknowingly holding tension there, which causes problems.

* Vaginal Devices - The Pessary - Michelle shows us a pessary, a device she helps women to fit and remove that gives them great prolapse support. Helpful if they are not eligible or qualify for surgery.

What to do now to protect and preserve our Pelvic Floor health - For Future Me

We wind the clock forward and talk openly about what can happen as we age - both women and men. The convergence of needing to pee (or poo) often in the night + heightened risk of UTI’s (urinary tract infections) + poor bone health + falling and fracturing bones + dementia. An all too common story.

The Importance of Preserving Your Baseline because if it drops, it’s much harder to get it back. And keeping it takes work! Worth it? Absolutely. For Future Me.

Where To From Here?

Michelle recommends doing the Australian Pelvic Floor Questionnaire. A series of super easy to answer questions to help determine where your baseline might be at. You’ll find a PDF link to it in the Resources section below.

Final Thoughts

Your Pelvic Floor does a lot of heavy lifting for you, every, single, day. Functions and support we take for granted, until it’s gone.

It’s inevitable that as we age, that our Pelvic Floor will weaken. But we can do much to improve, protect and preserve it.

It may be common, but it’s not normal. And you don’t have to just put up with it.

For now and for Future You.

About Michelle Murphy

Michelle Murphy is an Australian pelvic health physiotherapist, educator, owner of Mercy Physiotherapy and founder of Impact HQ. With 20+ years’ experience, she empowers women through evidence-based education on pelvic health and menopause.

Her mission: to bring awareness and understanding of Pelvic Floor health because it’s not spoken of nearly enough, it’s under-diagnosed and under-treated.

It extends well beyond her clinic walls. That’s why this podcast chat :)

Michelle is a newby on Substack so reach out and welcome her in. If you’ve listened to our chat, talk about that! Find Michelle on Substack here.

Thank you Michelle. Your passion, enthusiasm, knowledge, experience and dedication to our Pelvic Health is very much appreciated.

Resources:

The Australian Pelvic Floor Questionnaire - start here to understand your baseline.

The Anatomy of the Pelvic Floor - Continence Health Australia 3D anatomical model videos (both female and male).

Genioturinary Syndrome of Menopause (GSM ) explained - an article from the Royal Australian College of General Practitioners - Australian Family Physician journal.

The Vaginal Pessary - the vaginal device Michelle shows and talks about in this episode.

Bristol Stool Chart - to understand if your poo is normal (ideal) and how to recognise if it’s not.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app. I do apologise if the video is grainy at times. It seems choosing High Res is not always optimal. The audio is clear.

If you found this episode helpful and think that others might get something out of it, please share it on.

To your Pelvic Health.

Anita xx

Ask a Gen Z or Alpha and they'll likely just stare blankly. Not because they don't know what you mean, but because for them, it's just...normal

Because for them, in their predominantly online world, they are mainstream.

Meet Kiki Hart

Kiki is a digital persona created by Louise Cooper — born from the digital world, but sharing Louise’s perspective. At around 40 years of age, she’s your guide to navigating technology without losing yourself in it. She observes and informs, so you can decide what to do with it.

Exploring how culture, technology and modern life are reshaping identity, attention and relevance.

In This Podcast Chat We Talk About

How To Think Of Kiki. Regard her as a dedicated resource to lean on, to understand how changes in tech, in the digital age, may influence who we are, how we feel and behave. To inform not instruct.

As she explores important topics like:

· Wearable tech – Intuition in the age of wearable digital tech

· Aged Care (including AI grief bots - yes, that’s a thing) and

· Inter-generational Relationships – how connection, relationships and love changes in a digital world

Just to name a few.

Our Midlife Advantage – we have a foot in both the offline and online worlds and with that, a role to play in bringing the offline human conversations and stories to the increasingly pervasive online space. Our lived experience that brings with it critical thinking, pattern recognition, people skills – skills that are genuinely valuable now and arguably more so, in the future.

Being the Custodians of Connection – the real risk of losing meaningful connection with the younger generations because of the digital divide. They are digital natives (Gen Z and Alpha), as Midlifers we are not.

A Bit About AI - Artificial Intelligence

What it is and how to explore the AI space.

We talk about some popular AI options to use and how they each differ.

* ChatGPT — Day-to-day tasks and conversation

* Gemini — Google’s AI – also good for everyday use drawing on Google’s ecosystem of familiar products

* Claude — Especially good for writing and factual summarising

* Meta AI — Good for generating images and social media style queries

* Perplexity — Great for research; shows its sources clearly so you can cross-check

Tip: Each AI has a different “personality” and is optimised for different jobs. Try a few and see which one feels right for you.

Smart Tips for Using AI

1. Check who owns it .Understand the company behind the AI and their data policies before you share anything personal.

2. Always fact-check. AI can “hallucinate”. It sometimes confidently gives wrong answers. Ask the same question in different ways to verify.

3. Be mindful of bias. AI learns from your patterns and feeds you more of what you already agree with. Stay curious and actively seek out different perspectives. Ask it for them.

4. Match the tool to the task. Think about what you’re trying to do first - searching for information, creating content, seeking advice - then choose accordingly.

We are living through the greatest and fastest period of change in human history. Rather than being overwhelmed or left behind, we can choose to engage - and as Midlifers, we have unique wisdom and skill set to bring.

AI needs more data about women to reduce its built-in gender bias. Our voices matter.

Let’s be part of shaping this.

Anita xx

Follow Kiki Hart on Substack and join the conversation.

Thank you for being here and for tuning in. See you next week for another podcast chat. If you think someone you know might find this conversation interesting, please share it with them. That would be awesome. Thank you.

Did you know that up to 62% of women between 50 and 69 in Australia have poor bone health — and most have no idea? Bone loss doesn’t start in your 70s. It starts around our late 20’s and accelerates during the menopause transition, quietly and without symptoms, long before the health system thinks to check.

In this Midlife Unfiltered podcast episode, Anita draws on her own lived experience — a retired radiographer with an Osteoporosis diagnosis at 51, and a journey to reverse it without medication — to bust 8 of the most common myths about bone health and give you the knowledge to take action for yourself, right now.

Why This Matters.

The numbers are hard to ignore. They are Australian numbers but if you’re in a predominantly English speaking country they are likely to be similar for you too:

* 62% of Australian women aged 50–69 have poor bone health (osteopenic or osteoporotic)

* 10–20% of bone mass is lost during the menopause transition alone (in that 5–10 year period peri and post menopause)

* 70% of women over 79 are osteoporotic

* $3.5 billion — the annual cost to Australia’s health system for fracture care

And yet in Australia, a subsidised bone scan isn’t available until age 70, unless you have a pre-existing risk factor. That’s a 20+ year gap where lifestyle intervention could make a real difference. That’s a 20 year gap you need to advocate for yourself and fill.— but most women don’t even know their bone health status.

8 Myths & Misconceptions — Busted.

In this podcast chat Anita talks about 8 Myths and Misconceptions about bone health. To widen your awareness and arm you with conversation kickers to take to your health care team.

Myth 1: Poor bone health Is an old woman’s disease.

Bone decline starts around our late 20’s and for women, accelerates during our menopause transition. With about 62% of women having poor bone health (13% osteoporosis and 49% with osteopenia) between 50–69, poor bone health is not just what you get in old age. Don’t wait to find out your bone health status. Ask your doctor for a referral for a DEXA scan costs around $120 AUD . You don’t need a referral for a REMS scan. Reports are explained to you on the spot and are sent to your health team. They cost about $200 AUD. Your health fund may cover most of it.

Myth 2: Improving Bone health is a quick fix.

Bone is slow-changing tissue. Gains take months to years; loss can happen much faster, especially around menopause. Bone health is a long game no matter what your treatment options — the sooner you start, the better. And don’t give up on them!

Myth 3: Medication is my only treatment option.

Not at all. The LIFTMOR trials (Dr Belinda Beck, Australia) showed targeted strength training can not only slow bone decline — it can reverse it, sometimes better than medication. Plus it builds muscle and improves balance. HRT is also proven to support bone health in women, independent of menopausal symptoms.

There’s a link to the LIFTMOR trial in the Resources section below.

Note: walking, running, cycling and swimming won’t build bone. You need impact and loading — jumping, stomping, and targeted strength training.

Myth 4: Calcium is all my bones need.

Calcium matters absolutely, but it needs support with a healthy diet that offers:

* Calcium — the building block - 98% of our calcium stores are in our bones

* Protein — bones are made of collagen too; essential for strength

* Vitamin D — helps bones absorb calcium (low levels can actually draw calcium out of bone)

* Vitamin K — helps direct calcium to your bones

* Prunes — yes, really. 5 prunes a day for 12 months has been shown to slow bone loss. Prunes have potassium, boron, magnesium, polyphenols as well as Vitamin K which all support bone health. There’s a link to that study in the Resources section below.

Myth 5: Bones just hold me up.

Bones are living, metabolic tissue and an endocrine organ. They store and release minerals, respond to hormones and nutrition, and even produce hormones — osteocalcin and FGF23 - hormones that affect other organs and systems in your body. Mindset shift- think of them just as you would other important organs in your body.

Myth 6: A DEXA scan tells me everything.

DEXA scans have been around for about 30 years and have been a valuable tool in understanding bone health status. The standard DEXA scan primarily measures bone density. But because it’s a 2D snapshot of a 3D structure, it misses bone strength.

REMS scans (ultrasound-based) measure both and as such give an indication of overall bone quality - density and strength. It produces a Fragility Score that reflects bone quality and fracture risk . Changes show up in 6 months with REMS vs 18 months with DEXA. No GP referral needed for REMS.

Bone Turnover Markers (blood tests) can also add useful clues about how much your bones are building or breaking down.

Myth 7: My T-score is all that matters.

T-scores are a metric used to define bone health status - to diagnose osteoporosis. They are useful, but incomplete. What really matters is fracture risk. Ask your doctor about your FRAX score (10-year fracture probability) and consider a REMS scan to obtain a Fragility Score — these give a far more complete picture and should guide your treatment choices. Fragility Fractures are what we are talking about here. Fractures that happen as a part of living day to day - from lower impact, like tripping over the rug at home and falling over.

There is a link to a FRAX tool the Resources section below. It’s country specific so find yours.

⚠️ 2/3 of hip fracture patients in Australia are women with 25% of those women likely to die within 12 months of fracturing. Men fracture less often, but their mortality rate is even higher at 33%. Share this episode with the men in your life and talk to them about getting a bone scan done too.

Myth 8: Osteoporosis can’t be reversed.

Turn up the volume on this. It’s perhaps the most important (and hopeful) myth of all. Osteoporosis absolutely can be reversed. Consistent, targeted strength training — supervised by a physiotherapist or exercise physiologist — works. It’s not overnight, but the research and real-world results back it up. Anita is living proof.

Key Takeaways — Taking Action for Future You

* Don’t wait for a fracture or until you are 70 to get a bone scan. Get a bone scan done now! DEXA (~$120) or REMS (~$200), both may be partially claimable through private health. They are worth the investment - for long term mobility and independence - living a longer life well.

* Think fracture risk, not just T-score — ask about your FRAX and Fragility Scores

* Strength training is non-negotiable — impact and loading is what builds bone but do it under knowledgeable and experienced supervision for safety if you are in poor bone health.

* Build your health team — seek a physio or exercise physiologist who specialises in bone health and a GP who will support you to assess and scan early.

* Don’t be afraid to change practitioners if you’re not getting current, comprehensive care. Anita shares her story around this, changing endocrinologists and why.

* Bones are a long game — the earlier you start, the better the outcome. But it’s never too late to begin. Ever.

Resources Mentioned

* LIFTMOR Trials — Dr Belinda Beck’s landmark strength training research

* REMS Scan Episode — Anita’s full deep-dive on why she switched from DEXA

* Prune Study — 5 prunes/day for 12 months and bone health

* FRAX Tool — country-specific fracture risk calculator — frax.shef.ac.uk

* GP Osteoporosis Framework — for postmenopausal women & men over 50

* Dr Doug Lucas — Optimal Human Health on YouTube (holistic + science-based)

* Dr Vonda Wright — YouTube & podcast, musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause

* Healthy Bones Australia — Osteoporosis & Fractures in Australia: Burden of Disease Analysis 2023–2033

This episode is for information purposes only and is not medical advice. Always work with your own health team.

p.s. the new Substack high res option to record this episode was used which unfortunately may have produced a bit of jumping about. I’m sorry about that. I hope it’s not too distracting.

Anita xx .

Thanks for reading and listening to Midlife Unfiltered on Substack! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.

If you found this episode helpful, please share it on. Bone heath matters and the gap in awareness and care is huge. Thank you.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

About This Episode

The stories about those who are donor conceived are often quite shocking and sensationalised because…well…they make for a ‘good story’. But behind those stories are real people. People, more often than not, struggling with what it means to be donor conceived.

This is Erica’s story. Told very openly from the heart, with genuine care and thoughtful insights.

Erica’s Story

They Looked So Different

Growing up, Erica and her sister had often asked their parents about their origin story because they looked so very different. The same answer was always given, shutting down the conversation, implying ‘nothing to see here.’

An answer that understandably for them, never fully satisfied.

The Gift That Changed Their Lives Forever

As a Mother’s Day gift to herself and to Erica, her sister gifted them both a DNA test. Comparing results it was very obvious that biologically Erica and her sister were very different. Her sister with a considerable amount of Indian origin (50% from one parent) whilst Erica’s was French Canadian and Irish.

So the girl’s asked the question again. Finally the Dad who raised them confirmed they were both donor conceived and by different Donor Dads.

Unexpected. Profoundly life altering. Disruption.

Betrayal. Deception.

Grief. Confusion. Trauma.

Those are the words that are spoken of in this very honest and open conversation.

What We Talk About In This Conversation:

Shaken Identity: “I know so little about who I am”. How much of who Erica believed herself to be was wrapped up in where she came from.

Loss and Grief: For the relationships she never got to have, might never have. A biological Father she may never meet. Half siblings out there somewhere - and who knows how many of those there are!

A Deeply Destructive Disruption: Not told the truth, feels like she’s been living a lifetime of lies. A betrayal that cuts so very deeply. What is the truth? Can she, will she ever find that? So many questions left answered because the records, the information simply isn’t there.

The trajectory of what was often regarded as a transaction not thought through beyond to the needs of the children born from it.

Lack of Records and Identification of Donors & Births: Donor conception is not as uncommon as you might think. Globally there are millions. Ultimately though, the number is a wild guess. It’s a wild guess simply because records of who has donated, who has conceived and birth records are patchy at best.

To add further complication to an already deeply complicated situation, each state, each country has its own record requirements, if they exist at all. When Erica was conceived in the 80’s in Cananda, there were none.

As a result, access to personal information for donor conceived people is scarce. Even if you want to find out, it's often impossible.

Erica talks about the level of information she’s been able to find out and how she’s gone about finding that. It’s not been easy.

“I Have That Man’s Face: And I’ve never seen my face in my family members.” Another layer of identity theft and trauma. Through photo searching (and other means) Erica has found her donor Dad. There is a striking resemblance.

Imagine at family gatherings never seeing your face, yourself in others? How do you reconcile that? We go there in this conversation.

The Rights Of The Child: Information in the donor conceived world is scarce. The laws protecting and affirming the right of the children who are donor conceived equally scarce. In the past, the rights were firmly protecting the anonymity and privacy of the donor and the recipient. In many countries they still are.

But where does that leave those the children of donor conception? Those wanting to find out their origin story not just for themselves but for their children too?

Yet another layer of complexity. We go there too.

Medical Implications of Not Knowing Her Biological Father: “I know more about my dog than I do myself.”

We want to be proactive about our health. That’s why this podcast exists. To encourage self-advocacy particularly around health and wellbeing.

Being a late discovery donor conceived person severely impairs what Erica knows about her own health and her children's inherited conditions

We talk about how recording keeping for animals has been better documented than for donor conceived children. WTAF!

The Question She’d Ask Her Donor Dad Given The Chance: There is one that sits top of mind for Erica. Is it really too much to ask?

Where To From Here

If you suspect you are donor conceived or know that you are and are not sure where to begin, we see you and are here for you. This is hard. It’s a lot. It can be all consuming.

Consider counselling or conversations with an understanding therapist, mindful that not every therapist understands this space, its complexity and challenges. Teaming up with someone who is not familiar might have you spending much of your time educating them. Just sayin’ :)

Erica is a certified counsellor here in Melbourne Australia. With her lived experience she is happy to help. Perhaps start by dropping us an email at ‘hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au’ or send us a Direct Message her in Substack..

If you’re on the search for siblings or any information about your origin story then below in the Resources section we have listed a few places for you to explore.

If you are supporting someone on this journey, there are options there for you too.

Final Thoughts

Erica ends our conversation with thoughtful advice for those of us not walking in the shoes of those who are donor conceived. Compassionate wisdom. What not to say that may be well meaning but may equally well, add to the difficulties of this complex and deeply troubling journey.

Resources:

* Erica has a considerable list of resources on her website here. Books, podcasts and links to support and groups for donor conceived people. Links she has found helpful on this journey too.

https://www.ericawebb.com.au/dcp-counselling

* Donor Conceived Australia - https://dca-au-v2.squarespace.com/

* Erica & her sister share their story here on The Inconceivably Connected podcast - Episode 36: A Different Kind Of Father’s Day.

Thank you for tuning in! If you think this conversation might be helpful for someone in your life, please share it on.

See you next week!

Anita & Erica.

In This Episode of the Midlife Unfiltered Podcast

We Talk About

* What bioavailability actually means — and why it matters more as we age

* The spinach surprise — oxalates, raw vs cooked, and why only 5–10% of spinach’s calcium is absorbed

* What influences how well you absorb nutrients — food form, preparation, gut health & smart pairing

* The Triage Theory — how your body rations nutrients when stores are low (and why Future You could lose out)

* What changes in midlife — declining oestrogen, stomach acid shifts, and microbiome changes

* Key nutrients to watch — Vitamin D, Iron, B12 and a few others

* How to know if you’re getting enough — the clues to look for in blood tests and biomarkers.

So… What Is Bioavailability?

Simply put, bioavailability is how much of what you eat, drink, or supplement your body can actually absorb and use. Not just what you consume — what actually makes it into your cells and does something useful.

Three things influence it most:

* The form your food takes — the source (plant vs animal), and how it’s prepared

* Your gut environment — especially stomach acid levels, which change with age

* What you pair it with — some nutrients supercharge each other (think Vitamin D + Calcium), while others block each other (oxalates in spinach binding to calcium)

The Triage Theory

Proposed by scientist Bruce Ames, this is a theory that really hits. When your body is running low on micronutrients, it doesn’t share them equally — it prioritises survival today over your health in 20 years - for Future You.

Why We Midlife Women Need to Pay Closer Attention

Your 40s and 50s bring real shifts that affect how efficiently your body processes nutrients — even if your diet hasn’t changed.

Hormones:

As oestrogen declines, so does your body’s ability to convert and absorb key nutrients. Calcium is a good and important example. Lower oestrogen means less conversion and absorption + falling bone density = a double whammy in midlife and beyond.

Stomach Acid:

About 30% of postmenopausal women have sub-optimal stomach acid. You need that acidic environment to convert nutrients. Less acid = less conversion.

Microbiome Shifts:

The diversity of your gut bacteria tends to decline with age — and that affects how efficiently you absorb what you eat.

The B12 Example - B12 relies on stomach acid to convert properly. With lower acid and fewer animal-based sources in many diets, B12 is one to actively watch.

Nutrients Worth Paying Attention To

The BIG 3

Vitamin B12: essential for energy, bone, heart and brain health B12 is converted by stomach acids. From there our small intestine absorbs it. So if acid performance is lacking, so too will be our body’s ability to convert and use it. That coupled with the fact that B12 is harder to get in food sources any way it’s one to watch as we age.

Iron: Very broadly, about 20% of postmenopausal women are iron deficient — even without monthly blood loss. Maryann shares her own experience with iron deficiency causing anxiety and palpitations. Ask your doctor to test not just serum iron, but also ferritin (stored iron) and transferrin saturation (how well it’s transported).

Vitamin. D: is synthesised in our body by sunlight. Food sources that contain it are not so common with fatty fish (D3) leading the charge with high bioavailability. Mushrooms (UV exposed) for plant sources have a relatively good amount of D2 and slightly less bioavailablity than fatty fish.

Others to have on your radar

K2: Directs calcium to where it needs to go — bones and heart. Found in fermented foods. No official RDI has been set yet, but worth knowing about.

Iodine: Found in dairy, seaweed, seafood and iodised salt. Important for thyroid health. Check your country’s RDI (~150 μg/day is common).

Magnesium: Easy to fall short on, even though it’s found in seeds, nuts, legumes, and leafy greens. Around 320 mg/day is often recommended — but check what applies to your country.

💡 Quick Tip

Use the IOF Calcium Calculator (International Osteoporosis Foundation) to understand your calcium sources and how much you’re actually getting. It doesn’t specifically state bioavailability for each source but it does lean into it generally speaking. And Maryann’s advice? Variety is the go — focus on a wide range of sources to help meet your targets.

Where To From Here - Actions To Consider

* Educate yourself on important micronutrients, their sources and bioavailability. eg: Spinach (and other oxalate-rich greens) to improve calcium absorption cook it — or swap in higher-bioavailability options like dairy or Chinese mustard greens (yep, they’re right up their in bioavailablity per serve).

* Pair smartly — don’t just think about the micronutrients in isloation. Many are better absorbed when paired with others. eg: Vitamin D alongside calcium to significantly boost how much you absorb. Small habit, real difference.

* Get blood work done — specifically test Vitamin D, B12, Iron (serum iron, ferritin, and transferrin saturation).

* Diversify your diet — A variety of sources covers more bioavailability gaps.

* Stay curious about RDIs — many haven’t been updated in 20 years, and they vary by country. Check what applies to you and watch for updates.

Please Note:

Everything in this episode is information to help you ask better questions — not medical advice tailored to you. We are all different in how our body converts and absorbs nutrients. Please speak with your GP or a registered dietitian to understand what’s right for your specific situation.

Resources From This Episode

🎙️ Maryann Jacobsen — Certified Dietitian, founder of Midlife Strong on Substack. Subscribe to get her free Biomarker Guide: “The Essential Blood Tests Women Over 40 Need To Track and Optimise Their Health.”

📖 Maryann’s upcoming book — diving deeper into bioavailability and midlife nutrition. Watch this space!

🔗 IOF Calcium Calculator — International Osteoporosis Foundation — understand your calcium sources and calculate your daily intake.

Thank you for tuning in! We hope you picked up a few gems in our conversation.

And if you did, share it on!

Don’t forget to check out Maryann’s Midlife Strong AND stay tuned for when her book comes out next year. It dives deeper into this very topic. Yes!

See you next week!

Anita xx

Every. Single. Day.

Andrea’s mission is simple. Share information that’s grounded in studies about these toxic chemicals so that you can make an informed choice about what you choose to use. No bias. 100% independent.

Why does that matter?

Because these every day products are not regulated (unless they are for therapeutic use). The onus is on the companies that make them to disclose if they are using harmful chemicals like known Endocrine Disruptors in their ingredients list.

The descriptions used to market them are not standardised either. Something can be called Natural or Clean but that’s open to interpretation with so much latitude in the meaning.

It’s confusing. Where is the truth?

What ARE we buying? What harm is it doing?

Endocrine Disruptors (or EDC’s) are man made chemicals (of which there are 1000’s) used in manufacturing, that mess with our hormones. They do this by pretending to be and act like hormones, block the function of them or influence the amount of them in our body.

And they’re everywhere.

These sneaky chemicals have made their way into countless products we use every day. Personal care products (like skin and hair care and deodorants), sunscreens (that’s a big one) cookware (non-stick linings like Teflon), plastics, water and food.

And because we use them every day, the toxic load compounds over time.

The Culprits & Where They Hide:

We talk about the more prominent and pervasive nasty ingredients and the every day products they’re found in (to name but a few because there are many).

* Phthalates - commonly found in fragrances, some cosmetics & nail polish

* Bisphenols (BPA, BPS, BPF) - some “BPA‑free” plastics, certain cosmetics, and some flexible plastics like water bottles

* PFAS’s (‘forever chemicals’) - Non‑stick cookware (like Teflon), stain‑ and water‑repellent clothing, waterproof makeup, and some water sources.

Honest, practical insights backed up by information from studies and research Andrea has captured over 10+ years and updates daily as required.

The Proof and Research:

More and more research is being released about these chemicals and their health implications. The work of Dr Shanna Swan is respected, prominent and ground breaking having spent more than two decades studying the impact of environmental chemicals and pharmaceuticals on reproductive and neuro development. She’s linked significant drops in sperm counts and fertility to some of these chemicals. Fertility has dropped more than 50% over the past 50 years worldwide. Geez!

Links to her and her work are below.

Adrea also has a free Resource Library on her website, Switch Natural. There are handy and informative free PDF’s to download. Handy to have because this topic is HUGE and confusing. They’re great resources to come back to again and again.

The Switch Natural App: Because her community were asking so many questions and wanted a way to choose products as they shopped, Andrea decided to create an app so they could make better purchasing decisions. Unlike others that grade the products (sometimes with outdated databases), hers is completely information based and up to date. Here’s how it works:

* You download the app (it costs $20USD a year - cheaper than a week of takeaway coffees here in Australia!).

* Scan the product ingredients list by taking a photo of it.

* A list of known harmful chemicals (if any) appear.

* Search for more information about those ingredients on the spot too (using the magnifying glass icon).

* Research links about the ingredients.

* Alternative products.

* Shared findings. It’s designed to grow interactively too. You can ‘add to shop’ products that are not in the app’s database and Andrea then personally reviews them before deciding if they’re to be shared on the app - as a validity check. Most products are available in the USA (but many will ship internationally) so if you’re outside the US feel free to submit yours so that more products available in your country are listed. I will be adding Australian products for sure having started with my No Pong anti odorant (and no, I’m not getting a kick back mentioning it).

We Bust Common Myths: Here are some.

* Non-toxic products are more expensive - No! As with toxic products there are expensive ones and less expensive ones. Shop around and find them. They’re there.

* Product descriptions use legally defined/standardised words eg: Clean or Natural means no harmful chemicals - No. There are no laws that define what it means to be Clean or Natural. It’s a discretionary wording that is basically marketing hype.

* All personal care and beauty products are vetted by the TGA / FDA to ensure they do what they claim to be eg: free of harmful chemicals - No. Unless they are regarded as Therapeutic, they are not, so it’s a case of ‘buyer beware’.

* Fragrances are safe - No! This is a significant loop hole in ingredient listing department. Synthetic fragrances can hide many chemicals (including phthalates and other EDC’s) under the single label “fragrance” or “parfum”, unless a country has specific “fragrance disclosure” laws. This is because they are regarded as ‘secret formulas’ and as such must remain that way. Some brands will openly list their fragrance ingredients (thankfully).

* Sea life and coral reef safe means human safe - no, not always. Some sunscreen products swap the worse reef filters for other chemical UV filters which may still cause problems in humans. If you’re reducing EDC’s for yourself while still protecting reefs, look for a Zinc Oxide mineral‑only, non‑nano, paraben‑free, and fragrance‑free’ formula rather than just a product that’s ‘coral‑safe’ .

* Product ingredients stay the same over the years so I’m safe to keep on buying them once I’ve checked them once - no. Product ingredients can change. To be on the safe side always scan (check) the ingredients list for nasties. Using the Switch Natural app makes this very easy.

Where to from here? If you are curious about reducing your exposure to hormone disrupting chemicals it pays to look. Read the product ingredients list and find out if they are safe. Andrea’s Switch Natural App is a handy and easy way to do this as an option. Which ever way you choose, just make a start and pick one or two products you use every day. Then decide if you want to switch them out for a non-toxic option.

The choice is all yours.

Where To Find Andrea and her World at Switch Natural:

: Switch Natural Website (SwitchNatural.com) - where there is a free Resource Library. Make a start and download her 50 Clean Swaps Guide.

: The Switch Natural App - the first month is free then it’s $20USD a year.

: Substack Andrea Dahr (Switch Natural).

: Instagram and Facebook look for Switch Natural.

The extensive, groundbreaking research of Dr Shanna Swan can be found on her website . There is a Press section that lists some of her papers and the Appearances section is where you can hear and see her in action talking about her research findings on podcasts and YouTube.

Documentary: ‘The Plastic Detox’. on Netflix.

Thanks for reading Midlife Unfiltered Substack! This post is public so feel free to share it.

Thank you for tuning in! See you next week for our next women’s midlife focused episode.

Anita xx

Jane is one of Australia’s leading Trichologists who looks at scalps and hair all day long. What she doesn’t know about our thinning hair quite frankly, is not worth knowing.

In this brilliant chat Jane and I talk about not only the physical aspects of hair loss - how it happens and why but the psychological and emotional impacts it has too.

We Explore:

» What even is a Trichologist? What is their role in hair and scalp care? Why we should consider having them as part of our health team.

{Side Note: for the word nerds among us, the word “trichologist” comes from the Greek “thríx” (or “trichos”), meaning “hair”}.

» What Jane sees in Clinic - Jane’s helped 1000’s of women over the years and talks about the most common hair and scalp concerns and conditions she sees.

» What a visit to a Trichologist might involve. It’s not your 15 minute in and out. Jane takes us through what a consult with her looks like. Where she takes time and asks a lot of questions to understand:

* when you were last happy with your hair

* what’s been happening since

* medical history

* lifestyle

* blood test results - Jane will ask for these to be done prior to or part of the consultation process to assess Vitamin D levels (super important (85-90% of her patients have insufficient Vit D for optimal scalp and hair health), iron, fasting insulin, folate, zinc, liver and thyroid status at a minimum

* follicle health - magnified under a microscope

» The 3 different hair and scalp health team members and the roles they play. Hair dressers (in the front line, picking up changes first). Trichologists focus on hair and scalp concerns. Dermatologists are medical doctors with a broader scope (skin, hair, nails) who consult on complex conditions, prescribe medications and perform procedures. Trichologists and Dermatologists often work side-by-side.

Hair Thinning:

Is not the same as hair loss.

Problems and concerns don’t just pop up overnight, they take years to build before they emerge in our scalp and hair. Because the scalp is part of the body!

Our body doesn’t prioritise hair, meaning, if there is an underlying health issue, the body will prioritise directing assistance to other areas where it’s needed more. That’s why hair thinning shows up many years later.

Mindset Shift: Don’t just think hair. Think scalp too.

About Our Hair:

» Hair Physiology 101 - we spoke about our hair follicles and the hair growing cycle; long hair, strong hair, dense hair.

Hormonal changes in midlife and how these present in our hair and scalp. Other co-existing conditions like poor nutrition because there is rarely one isolated cause.

The healthier the follicle, the better the outcome for optimal hair and scalp health.

» Hair Mineral Analysis - absolutely fascinating! Hair record a history of what has been going on in our body broadly, from a biochemical perspective. Rather like rings of a tree. Hair segments preserve a snapshot of hormones, metals, drugs, and stress serving as a barometer of sorts to give clues about how the body is using nutrients essential for hair growth.

» Grey Hair - What it is and isn’t. (Hint…it’s not actually grey!). The common deficiencies that can cause this change earlier than expected. And why our hair chooses to do this.

» Scalp Health - Our scalps age too! And scalp health is vitally important when it comes to hair thinning and hair health. Jane talks about Oxidative Stress, Inflammation and the impacts on scalp health.

Treatments:

» What’s in a Trichologist’s Treatment Tool Kit - for when we need help:

* Getting the foundations right first - lifestyle influences that contribute to optimal hair and scalp health. Without these in place, all other treatment options will not realise maximum effect.

* Topical Minoxidil (in brands such as Regaine and Rogaine) - applied onto the scalp

* Laser Therapy - compliments Minoxidil (because they act differently)

* PRP (platelet‑rich plasma) - injections of blood‑derived growth factors to stimulate weakened hair follicles

* Exosome Treatments - loaded with growth factors and signaling molecules to stimulate hair follicles

“It’s not just about making hair. It’s about consistently growing it.”

To give our body what it needs to do this - getting those foundations right.

Myths Busted:

» Hair loss is an older woman’s problem. Jane is increasingly seeing women in their 20’s presenting in clinic. She sees a broad age spectrum of clients.

» Hair loss happens overnight - nuh-uh. It’s a long game with underlying causes occurring years before we notice. Sound familiar? Bone health is the same.

» Treatments are a quick fix - nope. Hair grows in cycles of about 7 years in duration. Just as the loss takes ages to notice, the repair does too. It’s a long game ladies.

» Wash your hair less to preserve scalp health - the opposite it true. A clean, dry scalp is an important way to prevent the impacts of oxidative stress and other antagonists. Your follicles will love you for it.

The Silent Conversations We Don’t Have:

Hair thinning (and loss) is a common problem and yet, one that we talk about the least. Trichologists go there too, offering vital support along the hair re-growth journey. Not just with physical treatments, but with equally important moral support too. Because the two are inextricably linked and emotional stress is the enemy of hair regrowth and thinning.

Final Word - Tips From Jane

* Make sure you’re shampooing as often as you can to reduce oxidative stress on the scalp. Clean and dry.

* Consider reaching out to a certified Trichologist particularly if you’re noticing your hair thinning. Do it as a preventative too - just like going to the Dentist.

* Look after your metabolic health - it underpins hair and scalp health.

* Know your Vitamin D number - get it up to 90-130 nmol/L.

Where to find a certified Trichologist near you:

There is a global network of Trichologists.

Institute of Trichologists (IOT) - is a non-profit corporation founded in California in 1974 to promote the study, research and legitimate practice in all aspects of the treatment and care of the human hair and scalp in health and disease. Search its global online register of trichologists to confirm whether a practitioner is certified and upholds the IOT’s standards of training and clinical practice.

Association of Professional Trichologists - has an online registry too.

Where To Find Jane Davies - The Hair Physio

Jane is based in Perth, Australia so you can see her in clinic there. Head to her website to book an appointment. https://www.thehairphysio.com.au

Jane does online consults as well if you need a chat.

She also has an active presence on Instagram where she shares information and tips. Look for The Hair Physio.

Where To From Here?

If you found this podcast episode helpful, please share it on. This is a conversation we absolutely need to have. To bust some myths, share the insights, get the right help and dissolve the shame associated with hair thinning and loss.

Send us a message if you’d like more conversations about this topic or topics related to it. Like Scalp Health and Hair Loss. Oxidative Stress and Endocrine Disruptors. We’d love to know!

Thanks Jane! Thanks everyone!

See you next week.

Anita xx

In this series our aim is to share real life experiences so that if you find yourself on this journey, or if you already are, you feel less isolated and alone. That others understand and see you and your struggles. We also want to share the light in the dark, practical insights and tips to help along the way.

We will also welcome conversations with those who work in dementia care and those who work in its varied support systems.

We are based in Australia, so many of our references are local. You may have similar services and support in your area, just with a different name. Any resources mentioned in these conversations will be listed in the show notes for you.

Thank you for joining us.

This is Margriet’s Story.

Margriet and Dan were married for over 53 years. He passed away after a 7 year journey with Striatonigral Degeneration (a disease closely associated with Parkinson’s) and with that, aspects of dementia which intensified, as the disease progressed. Dan was in his late 60’s when he was diagnosed.

In this open and honest conversation Margriet and I talk about:

>> The Early Signs that something was different, that then lead to a diagnosis.

>> How this disease played out for Dan

>> The Never Ending Journey of Difficult Decisions and Choices – Dan’s diagnosis had no treatment or cure. It was a downward slope of seemingly endless, difficult decisions to make.

>> Impacts on Margriet as Dan’s Primary Carer – we talk in great detail about this because it’s not spoken of enough. The impact of caring for someone with dementia, with an incurable disease is enormous. It’s deeply under-appreciated and under-valued.

The exhaustion and lack of sleep. The grief (ambiguous loss). Getting through the daily grind and nitty gritty of doing it all. The shame. The guilt.

Anxiety and Depression - Margriet wanted to highlight this as a very important part of the conversation. Her experience then and now.

>> What Margriet Did To Help Her Get Through: we call this Care For The Carer. Learning to put your needs first for survival and self health and what Margriet found helpful to include regularly in her week. She calls these ‘the circuit breakers’.

>> Navigating the Health System / The Aged Care System – the complexity of these systems to get the care needed. The importance of seeking help of those who know ‘how to’ (like the hospital social worker and Aged Care Providers) and taking in various care services on offer – as difficult and confronting as that may seem at the time.

Margriet shares the help she found invaluable. The simple and seemingly ‘small’ things that meant so much in the overwhelm.

>> The Most Difficult Day of This Journey - you may find this surprising. I didn’t. It was the most difficult day on my dementia journey with my Dad too.

>> How Art Saved Margriet and Her Relationship with Dan.

>> Life After Dan – As an Art Medicine Practitioner incorporating meditation, writing and painting. It’s the gift she gave herself in recovery and now helps others to do the same.

Find out about Art Medicine here. Margriet is referenced there.

>> Final Thoughts – Margriet’s final thoughts, important messages she’d like to gift you.

· Inform yourself as much as you can but don’t Dr Google too much. Go to your doctor, your GP (primary care physician/family doctor) first.

· Take the journey one step at a time. Because it’s overwhelming and there is much to take in and consider. It’s confronting. Like exploring a new country and language with many unknowns.

· Talk to someone who’s going through it too, because empathy and compassion are vital. This is an isolating journey. Connection is critical.

· Love is the answer. The light in the dark to carry us through.

Margriet read the poem ‘When I’m No Longer Here’ to end our conversation. It was a beautiful parting gift. The poem is from the book Wild Hope by Donna Ashworth.

Donna posted this on her Facebook page here:

WHEN I’M NO LONGER HERE

When I’m no longer here,

say my name to call me near.

I will calm your disarray,

move the mountains from your way.

I will dry your falling tears,

whisper comfort in your ear.

When I’m no longer here,

say my name to call me near.

When I’m a glowing star,

do not think of me as far.

I am with your inner child,

hoping you’ll embrace your wild.

Seeking joy in every day,

finding jewels of light in grey.

When I’m a glowing star,

do not think of me as far.

When I’m no longer here,

let me rid your heart of fear,

put it down upon the floor,

I’ll take it from your door.

Give me then your worry too,

let me carry it for you.

When I’m no longer here,

let me rid your heart of fear.

Thank you Margriet for your time, your kindness and your compassion. Your want to share your story so others who many be on a similar path, don’t feel so alone. For your wisdom and practical insights and tips. For your love and care of Dan.

Thank you.

Anita xx

RESOURCES

In this episode helpful resources were mentioned. Here they are with links so you can explore a little deeper.

Dementia Australia - https://www.dementia.org.au/

My Aged Care - https://www.myagedcare.gov.au/

Australian Unity - https://www.australianunity.com.au/

Movement Disorder Clinics – Dan and Margriet attended a local clinic in Melbourne, Australia. They are located across Australia. Search ‘Movement Disorder Clinic near me’ to find yours. Here is a link for general information provided by the Royal Melbourne Hospital.

Dance For Wellbeing & Parkinsons - https://dance4all.online/

This episode of Midlife Unfiltered is part of a Dementia Series to be rolled out in 2026. Important conversations to break down the stigma and myths associated with dementia.

Personal stories of loving someone who has Dementia. Those who care for them as a professional and those who help with supportive services and knowledge.

Most of us are ‘touched by knowing someone who has/had cancer’. It’s Dementia’s turn now. Dementia will touch the lives of each of us. A condition growing in numbers globally. Let’s open our hearts and minds to understanding more.

If you are loving someone who has dementia our heart is with yours. Both Erica and I have been on that journey having lost a parent to Frontotemporal Dementia. A different lived experience but one with many similarities. With deep compassion for what you are going through.

You are not alone. This is hard. It’s tough. We see you.

Anita & Erica xx

p.s. The quality of this recording is not brilliant at times. I am sorry if it’s distracting. The transcript may help to fill in the ‘stuck gaps’ for you. My internet connection on the particular streaming app (not Substack) did not play nicely on this day. Sorry. Anita.

Sound familiar? Those were our teenage years.

You’d be forgiven for thinking they were feelings from last week!

Welcome to the messy middle of midlife.

How do we navigate the tumultuous change this time of life offers up? How do we create a future that feels like it matters, that feels like it’s made for us?

That’s the topic for this week’s podcast chat with Jo Clark; midlife mentor, transformation coach, speaker and all round bloody good woman.

In this chat you will hear us talk about…

Some of the BIG CHANGES that shake our confidence in midlife:

* ROLES - recognised and familiar roles that are changing and with it, our sense of self. Who are we when those roles are no longer needed or wanted in the way they have been for many, many years? Partner, mother, daughter, work colleague, friend…(fill in the blank).

* IDENTITY - the tight link roles have to our identity. Realising who you are is not what you do. So what else is there?

* VALUES - the north star to discovering who you are, guiding choices to what comes next. And how it can feel when we’re not living in alignment with them.

The TOOLS and TIPS that help:

* Creating the space and time to think, reflect and writing them down. Looking inward to see more clearly and how to do that.

* Ease off on the need to control - go with the flow a little more to break down road blocks and be more in the present.

* The value of swapping a To-Do list for a To-Be list.

* Having a Wellness Plan - that brings to life health goals for Future You, uniquely yours. Health is foundational. Without that it’s very challenging to live a life by design.

* Taking 100% responsibility for choices made in the past and those that will be made in the future. Being accountable to you.

LEGACY & REGRET: as a driver for how you want to feel and who you want be.

Jo’s Story: Sometimes it’s easier to know what you don’t want than it is to know what you do. Jo shares her personal story about how her Mum’s life played out, the regrets she had and how Jo uses that as a motivation for what she doesn’t want to have happen in hers.

This work, this exploration, navigating this change is not easy. Nor is it one and done. It’s ever evolving, growing as you do and adapting to suit the often changing landscape of midlife and beyond.

Turn up for you, do the hard work, take accountability as you age with agency and power.

A bit about Jo:

Jo Clark is a transformation coach, speaker and mentor who supports women over 40 to navigate the complex transitions of midlife with clarity and confidence.

Drawing on her own experience of burnout, menopause, caring for ageing parents, raising children and changing careers, she helps women design a life that feels purposeful and aligned, rather than driven by default.

After more than three decades in education, Jo now runs her own coaching practice on the Sunshine Coast, offering tailored programs, workshops and keynotes focused on values, vision, goal‑setting and life planning for the second half of life.

She is also the host of the Redefining Midlife podcast, a globally ranked show where she amplifies the voices of everyday women and health experts to challenge outdated stereotypes about midlife.

Find Jo here:

* Website - Jo Clark Coaching

* Podcast - Redefining Midlife (& where ever you listen to your podcasts)

* Substack - woohoo! Jo’s new to Substack - Jo Clark Coaching. Head over there and give her some support. She’ll be posting more in the future.

* Instagram - @joclarkcoaching. Send her a DM. She answers all of them personally.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live and to you here now watching and listening in. I really do value your support. Jo and I hope you picked up a few gems from this conversation.

Join me for my next live video in the app next week.

See you then!

Anita xx

That’s the impact Mind Your Body: A Revolutionary Programme to Release Chronic Pain and Anxiety, had on Erica and why we chose to chat about it on the podcast. It’s a book you simply must know about!

"Pain is an invitation to recognise the inner truths that have been waiting for our acknowledgment like shame, grief and suppressed emotions…Understanding common traumas in order to uncover the depth of your pain.” Nicole J Sachs from her book, Mind Your Body.

Erica and I talk about various aspects of the book that caught her attention and expand on those with curiosity and deeper conversation:

:: TMS (Tension Myositis Syndrome, also called Tension Myoneural Syndrome or “mind–body syndrome”. The foundation for Nicole’s work, based on the mind–body model of chronic pain proposed by rehabilitation physician John Sarno.​

:: The Pain we feel is real - it’s not in your head. We all know this to be true when we’re stressed, we feel the tension in our body somewhere. Erica as a councilor and somatic practitioner sees this every week in clinic and supports easing that stress with exploratory movement and awareness. A mind body connection.

:: The Stress Loop - when we harbour emotions that have no where to go. What does that look and feel like?

:: It’s Counter-Cultural - to feel and express emotions. We are taught and encouraged to suppress them - to keep calm and carry on. What a load of BS.

:: So Where Does The Physiological Response Go? The shame we feel and ignore. The anger we find hard to express in a way that is true to how we’re feeling. The fear we hold buried deep within; from our childhood and in our adult life. The multitude of difficult emotions we shut down. Where do they show up in our body?

We talk about how Mind-Body Medicine is challenging those practices, urging us to pay attention and with curiosity, explore those emotions in order to relieve the pain we feel in our body.

:: The Importance of Self-Compassion - It’s human to feel this way. Those difficult emotions are nothing to be ashamed of. It’s all part of being human. We need to acknowledge that and meet ourselves and others with kindness with a hefty dose of self-compassion. The key ingredient to meeting our inner truth as we explore with an open heart and curiosity what those feelings are and mean.

:: Holding Opposing Emotions Simultaneously - like both fear and love at the same time. It’s challenging. It’s hard.

:: The power of using AND instead of BUT in sentences and thoughts, as we excavate and acknowledge emotions. ‘But’ disarms and excuses. ‘And’ empowers us, validating our experience.

:: More Gaps We Need To Fill - to advocate for ourselves when the traditional medical model and solutions don’t provide the answers we need to solve our pain problems. Erica stresses that Nicole is not dismissing the need to search for answers by having medical tests and investigations. Quite the opposite, they are and we must. But if the findings are not clear or if they are absent, then that is potentially a gap to fill with Mind-Body Medicine. Explore it with curiosity and advocate for you if this is your situation.

:: A Way Forward: Exploring the Hidden Truth - Using Nicole’s Journal Speaking framework. “The pain is not in your head. But the solution is not in your body.”

:: Add This To Your Toolkit - Mind Body Medicine and Journal Speaking as a part of your tool kit. Not a panacea on its own, rather an additional tool to support and help your pain and healing as you navigate being human.

At a time when we need this more than ever. In a world of increasing global tensions and fear. For ourselves. For each other.

Erica plans to Journal Speak. We might do a part 2 and find out how she found it. Stay tuned :)

A big thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! And a big thank you to those who are tuning in now. We hope you find a few gems in there.

Why not share those gems and let us know what resonated with you?

Join us for our next live video in the app next week!

About the author, Nicole J Sachs:

At 19, Nicole was diagnosed with a severe life-limiting degenerative spinal condition with no guarantee she’d ever be pain free post surgery, which was the solution on offer. She faced the realisation that traditional doctors didn’t have solutions for what was most urgent, ending her pain.

Curiosity (and desperation) lead her to the world of Dr. John Sarno, and his teachings on the brain science behind Mind-Body Medicine.

About 20 years of clinical practice where she’s, supported hundreds of thousands with their chronic pain, anxiety and other conditions, has been channeled into her latest book Mind Your Body.

Nicole J. Sachs, LCSW is a speaker, writer, psychotherapist, retreat leader, and podcaster. She is the author of the books MIND YOUR BODY and The Meaning of Truth, and the creator of online courses Freedom from Chronic Pain and Freedom from an Anxious Life. (From her website - YourBreakAwake.com)

Find Mind Your Body: At most book stores online. If you go to her website YourBreakAwake.com there are additional free resources to download post purchase.

Audio Book: If you prefer to dive in, listening to Nicole and John Stracks narrate Mind Your Body, you can. Here is one option if you’re in Australia. Or head to where ever you grab yours. You’re sure to find it there.

Nicole’s Podcast is The Cure for Chronic Pain. Find it on your podcast streaming platform of choice.

In Other Conversations: Nicole has a chat with Jonathan Fields on his Good Life Project (GLP) podcast. It’s brilliant. Her work and who she is, shines so brightly. Well worth a watch or a listen. Find GLP here on Substack in Jonathan’s world - Awake At The Wheel.

Dementia. It’s a cruel neuro-degenerative condition of the brain for which there is currently no cure. All we ultimately have to offer those with it, is comfort.

Shawna’s Dad had been diagnosed with Dementia - early onset Alzheimer's later amended to Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD). He’d also been experiencing IBS and other gut and gastrointestinal issues.

The Gut:Brain Connection

There is a tonne of knowledge, insights and experience Shawna brings to this conversation, together with practical tips and know-how.

In this chat we talk about:

* What the Gut:Brain Connection is.

* How to look after it .

* What harms it.

Helping you to age with power is why we wanted to bring this conversation to you. To encourage you to be your own health advocate and take back your agency.

Because there are gaps we have to fill. Dots we must connect, to live a long and equally healthy life. For your brain health. For future you.

Understanding the Gut:Brain connection and how to optimise that powerful communication superhighway, may provide ways to do just that.

Where to From Here?

Shawna can be found here on Substack - Third Spark Health. She’s going all in and dedicating the month of March to gut health.

Gut health lessons, recipes, shopping lists and more; information and practical tools to work with.

Your gut has been talking, it’s time to listen :)

About Shawna Robins:

Shawna is an international best-selling author of 2 books - Powerful Sleep – Rest Deeply, Repair Your Brain and Restore Your Life, and Irresistibly Healthy – Simple Strategies to Feel Vibrant, Alive, Healthy and Full of Energy Again.

She’s is founder and CEO of Third Spark, an online wellness hub for women who want to reset their sleep, create healthier habits and change their lives.

Shawna is a National Board-Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a graduate of the Institute of Integrative Nutrition.

Shawna has been featured on several podcasts and in Authority Magazine, Thrive Global, and The Huffington Post.

…she’s fabulous!

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video and for tuning into our conversation now. We hope you find it helpful.

If you did, share the love! Maybe there is someone you know who would benefit from watching/listening, please share it with them.

Join us for our next live video in the app.

Anita xx

p.s. if the sound cuts out for you (as it did for me when listening back) I found it helpful to hit the sound mute on/off button (at the bottom of the video windo. At times I do mute myself to save you from listening to my annoying cough. Ugh.

See you next week!

In this podcast episode on Midlife Unfiltered, Anita explores what it means for women in midlife to age with power. Taking back our agency, advocating for health.

Because there are GAPS.

Lifespan - Health span = 10-15 year Gap: We may be living longer but we are not living well, longer. Statistically (Australian statistics) if like me, you’re a white woman born in 1967 you may potentially live to be about 85 years old (lifespan). Maybe up in the late 80’s. Your Health span (how long you are healthy) is potentially going to decline (with obvious symptoms) in your mid 70’s. That’s a GAP of 10-15 years! Statistically speaking.

What do you think those years look like?

Lived experience - Anita talks about how she’s seen these numbers become reality, in the care home her Dad was in for the last 6 months of his life (with stage 4 cancer and dementia). Around 90% of the people in that very caring home were women. With multiple chronic conditions that were being managed for them. Most with mobility issues, some with mental health conditions. Many were lonely. They were receiving good care. Most were existing.

Women’s Health Research Gaps: About 30 years ago (in 1993) the US mandated women be included in clinical medical research. In Australia it was ‘best efforts’. That’s about to change. In 2026 Australia firms up its inclusion of females in clinical research where evidence of inclusion needs to be demonstrated to qualify for funding. Anita talks about that is more detail in the podcast chat.

30 years may seem a long time but in the context of clinical research it’s not. For good reason, it takes time. So research findings including women are now becoming more available for us to read and talk about. But in the scheme of things, it’s just the beginning. We have a long way to go, but we are moving in the right direction.

Education System Gaps: Underpinned by research gaps, Anita talks about the gaps in our tertiary and secondary education systems. The lack of information and knowledge in texts, resources and curricula, which means there are gaps in what our health team members know about us.

Why in secondary schools is it not mandatory to teach children about how their body systems work? The basics. Beyond sex education and the reproductive system. Maybe some schools do. Hats off to them, that’s great. But the majority don’t.

It seems one mimics the other?

Health System Gaps - Specialty Silos: Modern medicine is brilliant at acute practices that save lives, that extend how long we live. Treatments for symptom management of chronic conditions that do work. But in saving lives, extending them, a gap appears. The likelihood that more of us will be living with those chronic conditions, increases.

The Specialist. We have specialists with their deeper knowledge and experience to help us manage those chronic conditions like arthritis, cardiovascular problems, diabetes, dementia (the #1 cause of death in Australia for women)…the list goes on. The focus of care is typically short term - 1,2,3 maybe 5 years but what then?

What does your Health Span Road Map look like for Future you? More gaps to fill.

Each specialty represents a silo. We go from one to another to treat each specific condition. That’s great, but it promotes gaps. Gaps between silos that must be filled if we are to get a complete, a better picture of our overall health.

Who fills the gaps between Silos?

Lived Experience: Anita talks about her own specialist experience and how she filled that gap, advocating for her bone health.

The Old Way Vs The New Way: We are the Transition generation, living in the Digital Age where the pace of change, the volume of information at our finger tips is mind blowing. But how do we know what’s true? Anita talks about how this puts a greater importance on the relationships we have with our health team members.

She talks about the ‘old way’ where we believed our GP’s knew it all. To the ‘new way’ were we appreciate now there are gaps. A partnership approach.

Looking out for Red Flags and Green Flags (thanks Dr Sara Szal for that framework). The relationship Red Flags where we don’t feel comfortable asking questions, feel dismissed and don’t receive the right outcomes.

Lived Experience - Anita’s relationship with her GP is mostly Green Flags. She talks about a specific conversation with her GP where green flags were flying high and proud.

A Prevention Mindset: Showing up each day for you and your health. For Future You. A prevention mindset means honing awareness, seeking information and knowledge and taking action to fill the gaps. Anita talks about how she believes this to be perhaps the most effective way to reduce the gap between living longer and living longer well. Talking about epigenetics and lifestyle pillars, daily choices around sleep, nutrition, exercise, reducing toxins, connection and joy. Choices that help define our long haul road map.

It’s up to us to Advocate for our health.

Assemble your health A Team, ask questions, have those green flag conversation. Proactively fill those gaps with a prevention mindset.

To Age with Power.

p.s.

What Anita didn’t include in the podcast chat that she meant to. It’s a biggie!

Knowing Your Body & Listen To Its Love Language: It’s one thing to gather information and knowledge from the outside. It’s quite another to gather it from within.

Our body’s are incredible. Loyal allies doing their best to keep us keeping on, well. What we tend not to do so well, is respect them enough to listen to their messages. Their clues that things are different and we need to act to address them. Address them before they become obvious symptoms that become more difficult to manage. A chronic condition.

How good are you at listening to your body’s messages. The subtle clues?

Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live podcast video! Join me for my next live video in the app next week.

If you are watching and reading after the live, thank you too! I hope you find it helpful.

To aging with power!

Anita xx

Oh! If you’d like to subscribe to Anita’s Midlife Mojo long format newsletter it’s not on Substack (yet). It’s over in her Sequins and Sand land, her online business for the past 17 years. A business in transition, just like she is :) Here is the link to where you can subscribe. It looks a bit like what you’re not expecting, but it is the place to do that. Become a VIP and that email will land in your inbox each week. Be sure to add the address to your contacts so that it doesn’t vanish into spam land.

We record weekly so have banked about 50 episodes in 2025, moving to launch from Substack at the end of 2024. Still finding our feet in many ways but loving it here. From Substack our podcast is broadcast on all the usual podcast apps like Apple Podcasts and Spotify so if you are over there, look out for us!

Top 3 Podcast Topics for 2025?

The REST episode, resonated deeply. It was our #1 downloaded episode for the year. Erica's Reframing Rest framework, the star of the show. Listen to that Episode here on Substack.

IDENTITY: Who you are not what you do. When the scaffolding falls away in the transition of the midlife years, who we are, is what is left of us, raw and real. We've chatted a few times in the podcast with much loved guests of the show Alex Hanlon and Cat Matson, both now on Substack. Listen to Identity in Midlife with Alex and Cat here.

We also talked about it in terms of how we present ourselves, our style self-expression and how that can go MIA in midlife. We brought on another brilliant guest, Fiona Keary from Style Liberation to talk about this hot topic. She's a stylist and has helped 1000's of women find their style mojo again. Listen to that episode here.

VALUES, a personal favourite for us too. Best buddies with IDENTITY because who you are, how we 'be' sits on the solid shoulders of our values. What matters most to us. Values also help us to navigate all the shoulds in life - the expectations, the masks, the roles and bring us back to who we are. Values are spoken of in many episodes and are an anchor for both of us in the tumultuous change of midlife. Living with alignment of values.

Where to From Here?

Without giving you something else to do...consider reflecting on what your values are. What a gift to give yourself as the year closes and the next begins. Erica talks about the Value of Values here and how living in misalignment gives us clues as to why things feel 'wrong'. It might give you a little guidance to what your values are and how to navigate life using them.

I have also used Personalvalu.es and found that really helpful.

2026:

2026 for Anita will mean advocating for Dementia and Bone Health more having had her life impacted deeply by both. And for Erica, advocating for those who are Donor Conceived as she discovered she was this year. So watch out for more conversations around these topics and more.

What matters to you in midlife? If you have any topics you'd like us to tease out in a podcast chat then please DM us here or email us at hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au. We'd love to hear from you. Maybe you'd like to be a guest? Let us know.

We will be back soon. Leaning into our Values of Family and Connection, we will be taking a break from recording new episodes until the end of January.

Until then, we welcome you to dive in and listen to our 50+ episodes recorded through 2025 and the later part of 2024. You'll find them all here on our Substack page.

Thank You for tuning in and sharing your precious time with us. We know what a valuable commodity that is. We are most appreciative.

If you celebrate Christmas, happy Christmas! If you're gathering with those who matter most to you, we wish you a wonderful time full of love, calm and .... rest.

See you in 2026.

Anita & Erica. xx

In this week’s podcast chat, Erica and I discover that our relationship with Rest is at either ends of the rest spectrum. That relationship very much determines how we rest and when we do.

With the ‘silly season’ and the mad rush to year’s end upon us, we felt Rest was something that might be helpful to talk about. Rest is also the theme of Erica’s SelfKind hub this month, so…snap!

Let’s talk about Rest but with a genius reframe to guide us.

Resting From: in this chat Erica talks about the reframe of rest from the lying down for a nap or a read, to thinking about Resting From to guide us in ways that might serve us best to Rest. It’s brilliant (she’s brilliant)!

Resting From, to finding Ways To Rest:

* From rushing with many things on our mind - to slowing down and being present in the moment. ‘Wash the dishes to wash the dishes’ rather than rushing to getting it done. Being present to find peace in that moment. {Thich Nhat Hanh}

* From phone scrolling - distraction or rest? It may be mindless but is it rest, really? To conscious awareness, to pause. Maybe with a micropause (read on for more about that in our chat).

* From Self-Criticism - this one really hit home because it’s something we midlifer’s feel often. Rest from self-criticism with self-compassion. Be on your own side.

* From Being an Adult - to play! Being playful. Breaking the burden and responsibility of being an adult and be child-like at play.

What do you need Rest From?

Role Models For Rest: Did you have them? Anita and Erica’s experiences are poles apart. Having Italian heritage, Anita was modeled rest from a young child witnessing her Nonna and Dad resting often with a post lunch siesta. My family worked very, very hard (7 days a week and with about 4 days off a year) but rest was deliberately carved out, regularly. Modeled throughout her life, it became part of her life choice, modeling it for her children too.

Erica’s experience was quite different, never witnessing her parents resting. Indeed, resting was regarded as weakness, bringing about shame if it was practiced. Erica finds it hard to rest and her kids do too.

It got us thinking, is our relationship with Rest nurture or nature? Something that’s inherently in us or nurtured with us. What do you think?

Resting is something that Erica is consciously learning to do more of. Finding ways to ‘Rest From’ that work for her, like the examples mentioned above and with Micropauses of Rest.

Micropauses of Rest: not the 20 minute siesta but rather a small act that can ‘break the circuit’. Appreciating that not everyone will have access to rest in larger chunks of time in their day. Take them consciously and with compassion. Breathwork, movement, sipping tea or coffee in a space that feels good for you. In nature, often the perfect antidote to our modern stressful lives.

Consistency is Key: cultivating a Resting From practice takes time. It’s a work in progress. Don’t make it yet another thing to add to your self-criticism list. You’re ‘doing battle’ with a culture, an employment system that does not value rest. It values productivity - doing at all costs. And if you don’t keep pushing, you’re lazy.

We say no and ask you to consider ways in which you could create micropauses of rest. Ways to ‘Rest From’ and build with consistency, a practice that might just blossom into something bigger. Something unexpected but oh so beautifully nourishing. Where rest is a value and you protect and defend it often.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

If you enjoyed this episode, please share the love on. We could all do with more Rest. Don’t you think?

Want more encouragement and support around how to rest? Then jump over to Erica’s SelfKind Hub and find out a little more. It’s a beautiful community. Erica is so thoughtful and wise, way beyond her years.

See you next week!

Anita xx

We both read quite a few books at the same time. Maybe that’s a love of reading. Maybe that’s our ADHD speaking. :)

Erica’s Fab 4 Books: are a mix of fiction and non-fiction. Books she reads to match her mood. Maybe you can relate. There is a common theme that runs through each of Erica’s books - Reclaiming Authenticity.

* Vianne - by Joanne Harris. A Chocolat Prequel.

* Rest Is Resistance - Reclaim Your Power Through the Art of Rest: by Tricia Hersey. Rest as the resistance to the systems our society is built on. That have us believing we are machines. Can be confronting. A powerful read. On Instagram Tricia is The Nap Ministry.

* Unmasking Autism - Dr Devon Price. Erica has been recently diagnosed with Autistic ADHD scoring very high as ‘highly masked’. So this book is an important read for her as she continues to discover her authenticity.

* The Angry Women’s Choir - Meg Bignell . 5 stars! Set in Tasmania, Australia, women gather as a choir. They are angry for a raft of differing reasons. Finding joy in the support, expression and exploration of each other - both the light and the darkness. Beautiful characters. We wonder if there’s an ‘in real life’ choir like this. If not, there should be!

Anita’s Fab 5 Books: all are non-fiction. The common theme - the journey dementia and terminal illness can take us on with a strong Carer’s perspective. And health.

* Hormonal Harmony - A woman’s guide to puberty, fertility, menopause and beyond. by Dr Karen Coates and Sharon Kolkka. A brilliantly written and researched book that will gift you the knowledge about how your wondrous female body works and how to look after it. Taking us from puberty, through our reproductive years, peri-menopause and our age of wisdom (aka postmenopause). A ready reference to keep coming back to. To share with the women and girls (heck and the blokes) in your life. That’s what I’m doing this Christmas! This book is a gift in so many ways. A must buy. Dr Karen joined us on the podcast about a year ago talking about Menopause. She was amazing! Watch that episode here.

* Next of Kin - by Casey Beros. Casey takes us on a beautifully written and thoughtful journey as she cares for her dad with terminal cancer. Packed with practical insights too. Casey and her Dad are Australian so that’s the context of the care system she navigates and talks about at times. Thanks Casey. Casey is here on Substack too!

* The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying - Sogyal Rinpoche. This book is in it’s 30th annual edition now. A classic. Not so much a light read but a very enriching read. I sip from it. I so appreciate the perspective and wisdom shared in this book, through the lens of Buddism and practices from Tibetan tradition. It’s not about converting you to Buddism. It’s about living, preparing for death and helping the dying.

* Twelve Golden Gifts - Part lament, part love letter, part practical no-nonsense guide by Spiri Tsintziras. Spiri is an Australian with Greek born parents who migrated to Australia. In this book she lovingly takes us by the hand and shares the journey she had with her Mum as she ages. A tribute to her Mum and their beautiful, loving relationship that endures the tests of dementia (her Mum had Alzeihmer’s), declining health, moving into a care home and ultimately her Mum’s death. Practical tips and resources are shared too - the 12 golden gifts. In the darkness, this book shines brightly. Brilliantly written. Thanks Spiri. Spiri is also here on Substack.

* The Unexpected Journey - finding strength, hope and yourself on the caregiving path by Emma Hemmings Willis. In her honest, open and compassionate ways, Emma shares the experience she’s had as Bruce’s carer. Bruce Willis is her husband and he has frontotempoal dementia. The Nile call this a Caregiver’s Compass. That’s spot on. That’s exactly what it is. Emma’s care and passion to want to help others navigate this difficult journey is so apparent. She does it whilst parenting their two young daughters too. Such a challenging and difficult journey. If you or someone you know is on the caring for someone with dementia path, this is a must read book.

We hope there is one or a few books that have raised your curiosity. That might make your book shelf soon. Enjoy!

Have you got an idea for an episode? We’d love to hear them. Email us at hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Have you taken a loved one’s ashes back to their home town, to a country outside of where they lived most of their life?

The last time we were all together as an extended family in Dad’s home town in Italy, it was for his 70th birthday. For my Dad, knowing where he came from was important for us to understand and connect with. Something we have lovingly kept up as family members for over 13 years. But this next trip was something very different. And it proved to be far more complicated than we ever imagined.

‘Smuggling’ them in a suitcase was never going to be an option for us. Being separated from Dad was not going to happen, nor was risking that the suitcase might go missing in transit. No. He was going to be safely stored in Mum’s carry on and that meant going through customs with them. It had to be done in accordance with Italian law.

In this conversation I share my top tips for taking this task on and what was involved in the process.

It took us almost 4 months to obtain Dad’s Mortuary Passport, the official document required to accompany his ashes, in addition to other official papers that also had to be translated into Italian, including an apostilled original Death Certificate.

The departments involved in this process included:

* The local council where we were wanting to scatter Dad’s ashes

* The Italian Consulate closest to us here in Australia

* The Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade - Passport Office

* Births, Deaths and Marriages - because I had to get another original Death Certificate issued

Funeral directors can also assist with this process. Ours prepared the ashes in an appropriate sealed container fit for airline travel as well as the documents certifying its contents.

Family on the ground in Italy to help with face to face communications were invaluable because emails were not being responded to.

The language barrier (my very limited Italian and the local Italian limited English) also added to misunderstandings and uncertainty of what the process was and what was required to be done.

I learned that public opening ours for the local commune in Italy and the Consulate here are rather limited. Only open a few days a week for inquiries and for a few hours at a time. That extended the time line too.

The emotional toll of this experience was mounting and intensifying. Mum’s concerns and anxiety were riding high and with it the pressure I put on myself not let her and the others down, was right up there too. Failure was not an option. With airfares and accommodation paid for 12 of us, there was much to undo if the necessary documentation was not obtained.

There was a deadline to meet. We did it with 3 weeks to spare.

Taking my beautiful Dad back home. To the place that never left his heart. Firmly and forever in mine.

Anita xx

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

In this episode of Midlife Unfiltered, we welcome special guest Tracey Bode. Tracey shares her journey of stepping back from her business after a 45-year career, and the fulfillment she has found in being present in her everyday life post-retirement.

We talk about the importance of planning for retirement, what the big ‘R’, retirement even means now, what it means for Tracey. Is it Retirement or rather , Regeneration? Do we need a new word for Retirement?

She talks openly about how she’s done this, the vital role of good mentorship and financial advice to get to where we want to go.

Tracey offers insights on transitioning out of business ownership, the value of superannuation, and finding joy in newfound freedoms. In very surprising places.

Tune in for an inspiring conversation on navigating major life changes and preparing for a vibrant, purposeful life after professional retirement and running your own business. Having choices. Freedom. Autonomy.

Retirement is a huge transition in midlife. Thank you Tracey for sharing your experience in making that change.

Below is what we talked about and when in the conversation. Thanks to you for tuning in. We hope you pick up a few gems. Let us know. If you do, share it on.

Anita & Erica.

00:00 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered

00:22 Introducing Tracey Bode

02:30 Tracey’s Journey to Retirement

04:47 The Transition Process

07:14 Reflecting on a 45-Year Career

14:48 The Importance of Mentors

19:17 Embracing Presence in Retirement

23:02 Balancing Creativity and Personal Time

24:16 Morning Routines and Finding Flow

26:39 Reflections on Retirement

28:01 Redefining Retirement: Regeneration

33:27 Financial Planning and Superannuation

40:57 Health and Longevity in Retirement

43:21 Final Thoughts and Future Plans

p.s. we also mention a couple of groups we follow and tune into:

MEA - Modern Elder Academy - and Chip’s podcast the Midlife Chrysalis. He and Daniel Pink in this episode talk about Regeneration.

Her Business - a community of women business owners we belong to. It’s leader, the super impressive and legend, Suzi Dafnis.

Epic Retirement - with Bec Wilson

Erica has had times when she looks in the mirror and the image of the person looking back at her feels…well…rather alien. We talked about this in a previous episode here in Midlife Unfiltered. In that episode we both exclaimed that we needed to get Fiona Keary on the poddie to shed some light on what’s going on and more importantly, how we can reclaim who we are in how we dress…our personal style.

And she didn’t disappoint. Fiona knows her stuff. Seriously knows her stuff. Through her business, Style Liberation she’s helped 1000’s of women from all around the globe, reclaim their personal style. To feel more like themselves again and the freedom that brings.

Below are some highlights of that fabulous chat where she shares what many of her clients’ concerns are when it comes to their personal style. Fiona also openly shares smokin’ hot tips on how to do this, reassuring us that we all can. Smashing some commonly held myths and misconceptions. Yes! We love that.

Scroll through and you’ll find links of where you can connect with Fiona and a quiz to get you started on your journey to reclaiming your personal style.

Thanks Fiona. You’re a star and we so appreciate your wisdom, knowledge and time.

Anita & Erica xx

Common Concerns

Through the countless conversations Fiona has had with women in midlife, a common struggle is not feeling like their external appearance sits comfortably with their internal identity - who they are. And they’re not sure how to fix that.

“I don’t know how to dress in a way that feels true to who I am.”

She calls this common conflict the Alien Effect. I’m sure many of us have items in our wardrobe that when we put them on, feel ‘alien’ to us.

Myth Busted: The main issue isn’t actually about the fit of that item —it’s about understanding your Style Personality.

The Style Personality Framework

Fiona introduced 8 style personalities (most people are a combination of 2-3):

* Classic - Tailored, timeless, structured, minimal accessories

* Relaxed - Comfort-first, natural fabrics, effortless look

* Dramatic - Bold, impactful, prioritizes looks over comfort

* Rebellious - Irreverent, edgy details, doesn’t follow rules

* Creative - Unique, vintage, mood dresser, quirky color combinations

* Sultry - Glamorous, figure-embracing, bold accessories

* Feminine - Soft fabrics, gentle details (lace, ruffles), warm colors

* Elegant - Sophisticated, uses color and print with structure

» Curious to find out which Style Personalities you are? Find out here in Fiona’s free Style Personality Quiz.

The “Shoulds” Problem That Blocks Our Authenticity

* Women often abandon their authentic style due to cultural/role expectations. Here we go again ladies.

* “I should dress like this” or “I shouldn’t wear that at my age” - bugger that! If you love it and it feels great on, go for it.

* Many of us were of a certain style in our 20s. Trying to hang on to that in midlife and make it ‘fit’ with who we are now, that’s not going to feel ‘right’. Let’s embrace the now, who we are now and move forward from there.

* We talked about the “mutton dressed as lamb” saying and how that impacts us.

Life Transitions & Style Evolution

Style personality can shift during major transitions - many of these happen in midlife often all at once. It’s in these major shifts that we feel the pull of re-invention - to meet the needs of that change and at the same time, feel like it’s us as we do.

* Career changes - maybe you’re pulling back into ‘retirement territory’ so going casual is calling loudly. Fiona said that is often the greatest challenge for some Style Personalities too - how to dress more casually without losing their authentic self.

* Returning from maternity leave - maybe you need to step things up a bit

* Kids leaving home - time to let go and dress for the fun stuff! :)

* Moving locations - weather and lifestyle changes.

Fiona suggests revisiting your style every 3-5 years is often helpful.

Practical Tips for Discovery

Start in Your Own Wardrobe:

* Identify “alien pieces”—items you like in theory but never wear

* Analyze what doesn’t work: colour, print, fabric, cut, details?

* Examine pieces you love and feel amazing in

* Look for patterns, common themes, in your preferences

Shopping Strategy:

* Don’t look outward first (social media, trends)—look inward

* Use Google Shopping with your style words + item name + “street style” - Erica and I thought this was a smokin’ hot tip promising to do this and report back :)

* Experiment without the pressure to buy - browse and play.

* Try things on - that’s the only way you’re really going to know how you feel in something. Online doesn’t necessarily translate.

* Return things that don’t work after trying at home - they’ll only weigh you down and take up valuable wardrobe real estate.

Baby Steps As You Build Confidence

* As you get curious and experiment, Fiona’s advice: For people who know you, it will be new (you may get mixed reactions and that’s okay). For strangers, that’s just who you are. It’s a fresh start.

* Top Tip: Test new looks in places where you don’t know people first to help feeling less self-conscious.

* Build confidence gradually - get curious, experiment with one thing. Step out and see how it feels. Then go again with something new. Baby steps build confidence.

* Focus on fabric and cuts that feel like YOU - you’re not shopping to fit in with a trend, you’re shopping for who you are - your Style Personality.

Freedom - Your Style Liberation Will Happen

* To feel at home and at ease in your clothes without thinking about it all day - we have enough to think about. It’s so liberating when you don’t feel the drain of that chore.

* Be curious and experiment rather than being hard on yourself - have a bit of fun with it.

* Style personality dictates colors, fabrics, cuts, accessories—everything.

* Give yourself permission to not follow trends that don’t suit you - be mindful that just because it looks good on someone else, it might not feel right for you.

* Give yourself time - this is not a quick fix—it can take 2 weeks to 6 months to discover your style. Be kind to you as you go along.

* Embrace who you are now, not who you were or who you think you should be - now more than ever in midlife let’s kick those expectations that have shackled us in the past, to the curb. We don’t need them holding us back.

Dressing for who you are is liberating. Free to be me!

Go get ‘em :)

Thanks Fiona.

Anita xx

Find Your Style Personality

Curious about your Style Personality? Take Fiona’s free and fun Style Personality Quiz. You might be surprised with what it reveals :)

Grab More Style Wisdom

Fiona’s based in Australia but has clients all over the world. She can help you online or in person. Start here on her Style Liberation website and head to Services.

Online:

* in her caring, supportive Community of women who help each other reclaim their personal style.

* Course

* Membership

Website: StyleLiberation.com.au

Socials: Instagram & Facebook

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Steven Bartlett on his podcast Diary Of A CEO recently facilitated a very thoughtful, comprehensively insightful, practical and considered conversation with Dr Vonda Wright, Dr Stacy Sims, Dr Mary Claire Haver & Dr Natalie Crawford. Each of these women bringing to the conversation not only their particular women’s health expertise but also the added understanding of what it’s like to be a women in midlife, going through the menopause transition.

This conversation is a must listen because they help to fill some very important gaps each of us, as women in midlife and beyond are navigating, trying to fill:

* Gaps in Longevity - we may be living longer (longer than men too) but statistically we will not be living as long, well. The gap between lifespan and healthspan is real for women with around 20% of us living our last 7 years or so in poor health. Not able to move well or live independently.

* Knowledge Gap - It’s only been since 1993 that it was mandated for women to be included in clinical trials and research projects. A mere 32 years ago! The flow on effects of this is extensive. Those in the health space, who study to help us, are lacking in critical knowledge. If they are women’s health specialists then that gap is lessened but otherwise…don’t assume they know best or enough.

* Treatment Gap - most medical research to date has been done on white males. The treatments designed to assist are therefore well suited to white males. The treatments women are often given assumes we are mini-men because…the specific treatments for women have not been formulated to the same extent.

Be Your Own Health Advocate: the onus therefore falls on us to fill those gaps as it relates to our own health as best we can, for better health outcomes. How do we do that? By getting to know your body and how it works. What makes it feel better, feel worse? What does Future You, 100 year old you, need now? Adapt, act and persist.

By self-educating, reading, watching, listening with an open mind and heart - eyes wide open. Being curious. Having the conversations with your health teams. Don’t assume. Ask. And work out if what they are saying and offering aligns with your specific needs and values.

Not satisfied. Move on. Search for others who do know and can help you in the way that is best for you. I’ve done that with my endocrinologist. So has my Mum!

Listen/Watch to this powerful conversation here: please don’t be put off by the titles. They really don’t do the rich conversation content justice at all.

Part 1 - on Diary of a CEO (DOAC) released on 16th October, 2025. “Women’s Fertility & Lifestyle Debate: Dangers Of Not Having A Period! Fasting Can Backfire For Women” . It has a different title on YouTube: Hormone & Fertility Experts: We’ve Been Lied To About Women’s Health! If This Happens, Call A Doctor.

Part 2 - on DOAC released on 27th October, 2025. “Longevity Debate: The Truth About Weight Loss, Muscle, and Creatine!” On YouTube: Longevity Debate: SHOCKING Weight Loss Truth! They’ve Been Hiding This For YEARS!

Read: the show notes on each part on DOAC. They mention what is spoken about in the conversations. Toooooo much to mention here :)

About the Doctors in this brilliant conversation: These links are from DOAC’s YouTube channel and will ask you if you want to leave YouTube. Yes you do is the answer, then you’ll be taken there.

Dr Mary Claire Haver: ◼️Instagram - https://bit.ly/4ogsgwJ ◼️The Pause Life - https://bit.ly/48rycyv ◼️You can purchase ‘The New Menopause’, here: https://amzn.to/4nUOnt5 Dr Mary Claire is also on Substack.

Dr Vonda Wright: ◼️Instagram - https://bit.ly/46SMfvR ◼️Website - https://bit.ly/4n41GGg ◼️You can purchase ‘Unbreakable’, here: https://amzn.to/4n6xVEO Dr Vonda is also on Substack.

Dr Natalie Crawford: ◼️Instagram - https://bit.ly/4nbZFI9 ◼️YouTube - https://bit.ly/3J5fLFw ◼️Website - https://bit.ly/3W6E0pG ◼️You can pre-order ‘The Fertility Formula’, here: https://amzn.to/3KRpobk

Dr Stacy Sims: ◼️Instagram - https://bit.ly/4hcRuKm ◼️Website - https://bit.ly/47dqkhS ◼️You can purchase ‘ROAR, Revised Edition’, here: https://amzn.to/4nbjDmr

About DOAC: The Diary Of A CEO:

The Diary Of A CEO: ◼️Join DOAC circle here -

https://doaccircle.com/

◼️Buy The Diary Of A CEO book here - https://smarturl.it/DOACbook

◼️The 1% Diary is back - limited time only: https://bit.ly/3YFbJbt

◼️The Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards (Second Edition): https://g2ul0.app.link/f31dsUttKKb

◼️Get email updates - https://bit.ly/diary-of-a-ceo-yt

◼️Follow Steven - https://g2ul0.app.link/gnGqL4IsKKb Independent Research: https://stevenbartlett.com/wp-content...

Sponsors of DOAC: Adobe Express - http://ADOBE.LY/STEVEN Apple: https://www.apple.com/mac/ KetoneIQ - Visit https://ketone.com/STEVEN for 30% off your subscription order

Want more women’s health information and conversation. Aside from this podcast, Midlife Mojo is Anita’s weekly newsletter about women’s health and wellness. Exploring many of topics not often spoken (enough) about, important to women in midlife. You can subscribe to that here. (It looks a bit odd as it’s a link on Sequins and Sand, a business also transitioning, just as Anita is in midlife :))

Thank you to everyone who tuned into the live video! Join us for our next live video in the app when we speak with Fiona Keary from Style Liberation about expressing who we are through our personal style. See you then.

Anita & Erica xx

Perplexity.ai defines mediocrity as ‘a quality or state of being average, ordinary or not particularly good.’ It goes on to say that being mediocre literally means being in the middle, the average.

By its very definition, that’s where most of are - we are the average, in the middle. Mediocre.

So why does it feel so horrible to be called that? To feel like a failure if you’re ‘average’?

And where does that even come from? Who says? By what measures? Whose standards?

As women we often live much of our lives, the various roles we play, hustling, striving to be…perfect. It’s exhausting. And yet, we keep on going back for more. Why is that?

In this chat we dive in, stripping back the layers, talking about:

The Push:Pull of Mediocrity. The striving for not being labeled, thought of as mediocre. And yet, the need, the permission, the want to ease off and be, average at times.

The Quest To Be & Feel Enough. Can I be enough, even when I’m average and still feel like I belong, loved…needed? How the expectations of our culture, our family from an early age, design the perceptions we create, the stories we tell ourselves. You come home with a C. Why not an A? (message received…that’s not good enough). You’re an A student, what’s going on with this C? (message received…that’s not like you, are you okay? You’re slipping…careful. I better put more effort in next time).

What Are We Trying To Prove? Why? The comparison trap. Comparison to the outliers, the extremes. Those who have reached the summit of success.

Choosing Mediocrity: what would happen if we deliberately chose to be mediocre from time to time? Permission to cruise for a C (as Erica encourages her clients to do this). What would that look like? How would that be perceived? Does that even matter? Matter to me?

The Tension of Misalignment With Our Values: Not living our values comes into play, again. The beliefs that drive us. The power of Cruising for a C some times and how that creates a profound pause, to step outside and get a fresh perspective. To re-align with our values once more.

Our Identity and (Accepting) Mediocrity: So much of what we do and how well we do it, defines us. How we see ourselves. As we live out the different seasons of our life, that identity shifts. So too might the acceptance of mediocrity in our lives. The blessing post-menopause gifts us - a time to re-frame. Letting go. Snubbing previous perceptions and re-writing the stories we tell ourselves. No more hustling!

What do the Ancients Say? Is the ‘eastern way’ different to our ‘modern, western view’ of mediocrity? Does mediocrity even exist as a concept ‘‘over there’?

Mediocrity Vs Contentment: - Go hard or go home Vs when enough is plenty. The 2 ‘ends’ of the spectrum? Where do you sit on that spectrum? Does mediocrity have a place in contentment? Maybe it’s holding both at the same time and being okay with that.

Grief: In the recognition that we will never be enough. Does that keep us hustling?

Is hustling, striving, a remarkable avoidance strategy? Oh yes! THAT is a juicy question.

Self-compassion, Care & Kindness: letting them in.

It was quite the chat. We felt it could have gone on and on. Time for you to chime in.

Questions For You? What does mediocrity mean to you? Do you choose it from time to time or do you fear it?

Thank you for reading, for listening. Join us for our next live video in the app next week when we speak to Tracey Bode about her recent transition from business owner to letting it go, diving into the next phase of her life and the new found freedom it’s bringing.

It may seem frivalous at first, but thinking about why and talking it through…well…turns out it’s faaar from frivalous. Join us as we talk it through on the podcast.

Feeling Like ME.

“I’ve never really found my style, so it typically doesn’t look like what I see. But in my early 40’s I desperately want to look in the mirror and feel like me. But finding that (thing) in the mirror is proving to be very challenging.” Erica, talking openly about her style mojo right now, in midlife.

I’ve personally had similar conversations with many women in midlife as a swimsuit stylist (at Sequins and Sand) for some 15 years. The way Erica feels, the questions coming up for her about her personal style are far from unique. Maybe you’ve had them with yourself, with your friends, your family.

Personal Style, is about expressing who you are - how you dress, your hair cut…how you present yourself to others in a way that says ‘this is me’.

So it makes perfect sense that in a time of enormous personal change and transition, that our personal style and how we express that, is changing too.

Authenticity. Identity. Confidence.

Scratch the surface as we did in this conversation and it might well reveal how this influences your values and how they are expressed in the world. Erica discovered that her values of sustainability and honesty were dampened too.

The Change. The Conflicts.

Have you felt that change? Perhaps it’s pangs of self-doubt, a loss of confidence in how you express who you are in the way you dress and cut/style your hair?

It’s not just those internal changes and conflicts. The expectations, the boundaries and ‘dress code’s from our outside world play their part too.

“I feel messy on the inside and want that to be a expressed on the outside. Eclectic, messy, unconstrained.” When Erica was in corporate life, she felt it ‘stitched her in’, suffocating.

The pull between expressing ourselves and not wanting to stand out. Maybe that’s about wanting to belong.

Q: Does your personal style conflict with your culture, work place, home environment?

Q: Do you dress for you or for others? For what the situation ‘calls for’.

Ageism - yet another set of unspoken rules and cultural expectations. That expression ‘mutton dressed up as lamb’. F#ck off! Push that aside. Dress for you.

The gift of post-menopause years is certainly the liberation of not giving so many f#cks about what others think.

The self-discovery of midlife. It can be fun! Let’s make it fun and ask of ourselves, of each other, is how you’re presenting yourself, expressing yourself through your personal style, a reflection of who you are?

We also talked about getting Fiona Keary from Style Liberation on the podcast. She’s a friend who helps 1000’s of women in midlife bring their Style Personality out to play, to be seen.

Has how you express yourself, your personal style changed in midlife? Is it on shaky ground? Has is changed as you have changed in midlife and beyond?

Are you being seen, truly seen, for who you are?

Join us as we talk this through on the podcast.

Let us know how your personal style has changed in midlife. Has it changed with you? Let us know in a comment below.

To reigniting your personal style in midlife. To feeling like you. To being truly seen.

This is me!

Anita (+ Erica) xx

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Having been on a dementia journey with my family and Dad, I am rather familiar with this misconception about dementia. It’s why we need to have many, many, many conversations about it. To broaden understanding about what dementia is and how it can infiltrate and influence so many aspects of our lives. We’ve had those conversations about cancer. We believe it soon will be overtaken by conversations about dementia.

There are somewhere between 120 and 400 forms of dementia (depending on the source you read) caused by different diseases that affect the brain.

Blown away by that statistic? Erica and I were.

There are so many because of the large number of derivations within each major sub-type of dementia. (If you are a dementia expert and can enlighten us on how this statistic comes to be and indeed if it’s accurate, please do comment and let us know).

“Dementia is not a single disease, but rather an umbrella term for a group of progressive illnesses that cause a decline in brain function, leading to symptoms like memory loss, confusion, difficulty with thinking and problem-solving, and changes in mood and behavior. It is more than what is expected from normal aging, with Alzheimer’s disease being the most common cause. Symptoms are diverse and can include trouble with daily tasks, speaking, writing, and spatial abilities.” (Alzeheimers.gov).

According to Dementiastatistics. There are 10–15 recognised major forms of dementia and many additional rare subtypes and variants, but most cases fall under four–five main diagnostic categories. Alzeheimer’s is the most common form of dementia and gets the most airtime (which would contribute to the misconception) but there are other forms like Frontotemporal Dementia - the form Erica’s Mum and my Dad had.

Dementia is terminal.

Dementia is currently the #1 cause of death for Australian women and #2 for Australian men (cardiovascular disease is #1) according to the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare.

The reason why it causes so many deaths is because dementia impacts the function of our brain and with that, other functions of the body like swallowing, breathing, and circulation, increasing susceptibility to fatal infections.

Dementia is terminal. Yet it currently is excluded from VAD (voluntary assisted dying). If you’ve witnessed someone you love die from dementia would you support having it included? I know I would. It’s a discussion I’d certainly welcome on the podcast.

Dementia Awareness (month).

September has been dementia awareness month internationally, aiming to bring increased awareness, educate, support and reduce the stigma associated with dementia.

When I shared with others that my Dad has/had Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD), understandably there were confused and blank looks. But when I said it’s the type like Bruce Willis has, then the clouds started to part - “Oh…”. The far reaching power of a public figure.

I love the brave and compassionate work of his incredible wife Emma Hemming-Willis who brings vital awareness of FTD and dementia and equally important (if not more) the impact it has on Carer’s and those who love someone with dementia.

I’ve recently purchased her book The Unexpected Journey. It’s essential reading to broaden understanding and the impacts of dementia. The other book I found very helpful was Loving Someone Who Has Dementia by Pauline Boss. She founded the term Ambiguous Loss, something both Erica and I have felt deeply as we’ve grieved our parents on our dementia journeys. Understanding ambiguous loss certainly helped us to understand and accept the emotions we were experiencing.

Our Dementia Stories

In this podcast chat, Erica and I share a bit about our dementia stories. Erica’s Mum and my Dad both had FTD, though different variants. We talk about how that presented itself, the impacts it had on us and what we’re doing to raise awareness and lighten the burden of those who are on their dementia journey.

Do You Have a Dementia Story To Share?

As a way to help spread awareness, understanding and empathy for those who have, care for and love someone who has dementia, we are wanting to create a dementia series on the podcast where personal stories are shared.

If you would like to share your personal experience with dementia or know of someone who might, then please reach out to us at Hello@Midlifeunfiltered.com.au with the email subject ‘Dementia Series’ (so we can find it more easily) and we’ll be in touch.

To share personal stories, personal experiences is so very powerful. It helps others appreciate they are not alone, and it helps those of us who have been on that journey to deepen our self-compassion too. The more we talk about dementia more openly the better we will all be to understand, destigmatise and ‘normalise’ what will one day be something each and every one of us will be touched by.

Equally well, if you are someone whose profession is to help those with dementia and those who care for them, we’d love to hear from you too. In our series we’d like to talk about:

* what dementia is and how to receive a diagnosis

* navigating the health system - to get the medical and overall health and wellness support for those with dementia and those who care for them

* how to personally fund and pay for the care that may be required

* understanding the legal documents to have in place to manage the consequences of living with dementia

* preparing for death from dementia

Thank you for all your support. We really do appreciate you. Join us for our next live video in the app! If you subscribe, you’ll be sent an email when we go live so you can listen and comment as we chat. Erica and I would love that :)

Until then.

Anita xx

In this very honest and open conversations Alex and Cat join Eric and Anita to talk about Identity in midlife. Unfiltered.

What we do Vs Who we are because they are not the same thing.

But how to you know who you are and what can guide you through that discovery.

How have your Identity shifts impacted you in midlife?

Thanks Cat and Alex for yet another insightful, brilliant midlife chat.

In this episode we take a path off the road of curiosity and explore the Beginner’s Mindset. Exploring new with little (if any) expectation of what will unfold but with and open heart and mind willing to try and to learn. Taking a passage from the good book of Brene Brown (Atlas of the Heart) to guide us.

Watching a toddler learn to walk. Falling down, getting back up again. Falling down, getting back up again, and again, and again. Do we think of them as failing when they fall? Not at all. It’s a part of the process of learning a new skill, our brains and body adapting until we ‘get it’. What a joyous feeling that is. The encouraging words and cheers of those nearby - “yay! Look at you! You can do it!”

We might not have the cheer squad close by as we try but there is something joyous about being a Beginner again. Learning new things.

What does it mean to have a Beginner’s Mindset? How is that different to being curious?

It’s not always easy. There are road blocks that hold us back. The reasons not to. The emotions that pull us down. Embarrassment all the way through to feeling very vulnerable. It’s humbling too. We talk about those emotions and what holds us back from exploring with a Beginner’s Mindset - in the context of Anita learning to play the drums and Erica her roller skating.

We also talk about the gifts of a Beginner’s Mindset - the joy of having fun, the pride of accomplishing, of doing something that we didn’t think we could - that we had wanted to do, for years. Being present. Fully present in the moments of doing, of thinking.

For our brain health. Our brains are plastic. Able to open up new pathways ignited by the challenges of the new. Fuel the creation of those new pathways with a Beginner’s Mindset.

And what that unleashes within us - wanting more. Exploring. Growing. Becoming. Living not existing. A longer, healthier life.

Have you learned a new skill in midlife? Is there something you’ve always wanted to do but as yet haven’t taken the leap. Maybe it’s about putting your ego in your pocket and having a go.

Maybe there’s a brilliant drummer or roller skater deep inside, wanting to get out and show you how great you are.

To your magnificent midlife - Beginner’s Mindset and all.

Anita & Erica.

p.s. Curiosity is a high value of ours. We talk about it often. If you’d like to explore Curiosity with us, here is a link to a previous episode we’ve done on Curiosity. Enjoy.

And if you’ve enjoyed this episode of Midlife Unfiltered, we invite you to share it with others who you think might enjoy it too. To encourage a Beginner’s Mindset and living a magnificent midlife.

I may be older, but in many ways I feel young again. Taking pauses in my day to soak in the wonder of the trees around me. The birds that scoot through them at break neck speed, the light playing on leaves.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

But they don’t have to be big, or forced. We can choose very small pauses to ground, reset and appreciate what we’re feeling and what an honest next step might be.

Or, it might gift us not knowing. Space. Quiet. To feel.

Those small pauses based on what we need in that moment that will serve us well. Aligned with what matters most to us, our values.

It might be choosing to read a new book for 20 mins instead of doing the washing. The washing will get done…when it gets done.

How you show up for you, is showing others how to show up.

Do you love yourself enough to pause?

How do you pause? Small pauses. Larger pauses? We’d love to know and so might others who are seeking to pause and what that could look like for them.

Thanks for being here. To taking counter-cultural pauses. No guilt. No judgement. No shame.

Anita & Erica.

p.s. In the chat we talk about ‘honest steps’ words Anita found, that struck deeply, in a note here on Old Man Talks on Substack.

A large meta analysis studies show that social isolation increases the risk of all-cause mortality by 26-32% even after allowing for factors like age, health, behaviours and chronic illness.

Connection. Being present. Belonging. For a longer, well life, is essential.

Midlife is a time when we re-evaluate and ask the big questions. Letting go of what no longer serves us and preserving and nurturing what does. Friendships we value and those we let fall away.

We met over 5 years ago online in a business goals group. Now we carve out a long weekend every year to meet in person. Scattered across Australia, the distance apart is significant - we are not just around the corner from each other.

Time to connect, for each other, for ourselves as individuals. It’s precious.

Join Kristy, Fiona and Anita as they talk about the value of their friendship, the connection they hold dear and why this annual pilgrimage matters.

Do you have people in your life you gather with, even over vast distances to connect with? Why does it matter to you? And will Future You want it to continue?

> What is an end of life doula?

> How do we normalise death in a society that is reluctant to discuss mortality?

> The importance of having end-of-life conversations, creating legacy letters, and building compassionate communities. 

> An exploration of the practical aspects of advanced care planning and the emotional landscape surrounding death.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

End of Life Doula DirectoryPreparing the Way - Certificate IV End of Life DoulaAdvanced Care Planning Australia

About our guest, Jacqui Williams:

Jacqui Williams is an End of Life Doula and Funeral Celebrant in the Brisbane, Redlands and Sunshine Coast Area. 

Connect with Jacqui:

Website: https://endoflifetransitions.com.au/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/end_of_life_transitions

Connect with Anita and Erica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

About Anita McLachlan:

At the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years, Anita has helped thousands of women feel more confident in their swimwear - and their bodies - as Australia’s Cossie Whisperer. She’s now turning her attention to supporting women in midlife to navigate this often tumultuous, but also very powerful time of life. Ultimately, her focus is now on supporting other midlife women to have the freedom and confidence to be themselves.

Connect with Anita:

Website : www.SequinsandSand.com.auFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/sequinsandsand.com.auLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anita-mclachlan-b307869/?originalSubdomain=auEmail : Anita@SequinsandSand.com.auPassion Project : www.CossieConfidence.com.au 

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:

Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. 

Connect with Erica:

Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/

In our conversation, Maryann Jacobsen and I talk about:

* What do we mean by Blood Vessel Health (BVH) - our endothelial health.

* How our BVH changes as we age and why in midlife it's a prime opportunity to assess where it's at and make changes to support it.

* The bio-markers, to ask to include in your regular blood tests. These are the clues that can indicate if our BVH is not as optimal as it could be. Maryann has a fabulous Bio-Marker Checklist that outlines which ones to include in your regular blood tests. Click here to grab yours!

* Your sleep and BVH.

* The importance of Nitric Oxide and BVH.

* What can we do to improve our BVH.

Maryann and I urge you to become your own health advocates. Because there are gaps in women's health. Gaps in research, knowledge, understanding, awareness and treatments. Be Blood Vessel Health aware. Get your blood tests done annually as a gift to you now and Future You. Read up (like in publications from Maryann Jacobsen), arm yourself with information and ask the questions of your health team. Please don't assume they know.

Future You will love and appreciate you for it.

Thanks so much for tuning in. Don't forget to grab your Bio-Marker Checklist from Maryann.

See you next week on Midlife Unfiltered.

Anita xx

Anita thought that was true for her life too. But upon reading about Regret in Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown, she did a complete back flip. There is so much more to this emotion than a meets the eye.

Of course she’s lived a life with regrets. We all do. That’s being human.

Join Erica and Anita as they talk about the gift of exploring this often glossed over or underappreciated emotion in midlife and open up about some of their personal experiences of Regret. Choices made. Paths not taken. Is it even fair to think we could have made a different choice, for a better outcome?

They talk about…

Regret being different to Disappointment even though they both arise from situations where things didn’t go as planned, where the outcome we were seeking didn’t eventuate.

Acknowledging our Regrets and how difficult and painful that can be - because we can’t go back and change it. How it can bring about feelings of guilt and shame.

The important roles time and control play in our feelings of Regret.

Accountability and Regret.

The incredible gift of Regret Reflection and how that can fuel our personal growth and deepen our understanding of self. A framework to extract power from Regret.

The role of Self-Compassion when reflecting upon our Regrets.

The link between our values and Regret and how misalignment can bring about the tension that leads to Regret.

“And when used constructively (Regret) is a call to courage and a path towards wisdom.” (Brene Brown - Atlas Of The Heart).

The wisdom of midlife and beyond.

Care to share? We’ve all had them…Regrets. Upon reflection, what has one of your significant Regrets taught you? Were there values it misaligned with to cause that tension now? Not up for sharing? That’s okay. Maybe write it out as you give it some thought.

This emotions is quite a popular topic for songs and lyrics. Wanting to go back in time and change things.

What song immediately springs to mind when you think about Regret?

============

Want to explore some more? Here are a few ways to do that.

Atlas Of The Heart by Brene Brown.

Erica’s other podcast - Self-Kind - conversations in self-care, kindness and compassion for highly sensitive people.

Anita’s Midlife Mojo newsletter often talks about the emotions of midlife as well as health and wellness topics. Sign up for that here.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for my next live video in the app.

Hello! Thanks for being here. Let’s cultivate a little Joy together. In this chat you’ll hear (and see) Erica & I talk about JOY from various perspectives:

The importance of cultivating & acknowledging JOY regardless of what else is going on. In the context of our individual lives and beyond, across the global landscape. Holding grief and JOY together.

Brenee Brown - Atlas of the Heart: The concept of Chairo (χαίρω) by the ancient Greeks. Yep, they’ve nailed it…yet again.

The difference between JOY and happiness - and the subtle nuance; connection within vs external pursuits.

JOY, Spirituality and Connection - within us, with others, with a higher power. That sense of being present and at the same time connected with something, someone beyond us.

How who we are gives clues to what gifts us JOY: Values, Identity and Authentic us - connecting with the JOY within us; WHO we are and what matters most. Erica’s Joy Inventory exercise.

Pleasure, appreciation, gratitude - in the moment, of and with JOY. Within ourselves and with others.

JOYSPAN - concept coined by Dr Kerry Burnight; not Lifespan and Healthspan rather living well; The Joyspan Compass - 8 science backed elements, things that matter most in midlife by Brodee Myers-Cook.

What does JOY feel like? How do you know? what you feel in your body? The emotions you feel when JOY is present.

The Flow State - when we feel JOY; alignment with values and who we are.

Losing JOY as we move through life, as we age.

Creating space for JOY - to give JOY the voice, she needs to show up for us…from within. The experiences that will bring her out to play. They’re not always loud. They can be quiet. They can be simple. With intention. With awareness.

JOY Homework - watch Inside Out movies + The Joy Inventory (links below).

Links:

* Joy Inventory worksheet - Erica uses this in her work with clients, membership and courses. Get your free copy here.

* Joyspan Compass - Roadtrip To Younger by Brodee Myers-Cook also on Substack here.

* Joyspan - in Heather Straughter’s Oh Healther! article on Substack: Can You Define Joyspan?

* Inside Out and Inside Out 2 movie trailers. Exploring emotions. Stream where you can.

* The Aging Project - Joyspan podcast episode with Dr Kerry Burnight.

Thank you. We hope you’ve gleaned a few Joy clues and found this episode helpful. Thanks too to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video next week in the app.

Dr Louann Brizendine is ushering us to do just that, to instead call these phases of life The Transition & The Upgrade. Just saying those words feels more uplifting and empowering.

Her book ‘The Upgrade - How The Female Brain Gets Stronger And Better In Midlife And Beyond’ is a must read for any woman in her 30’s and older. Heck, for men too! Based on research, scientific facts and years of clinical practice experience this book is an easy read loaded with practical advice. Peppered with relatable stories of women she’s helped in her Mood and Hormone Clinic since 1994! She’s a trailblazer, very much ahead of her time and current conversations.

Join Erica and I as we talk about the contents that caught our attention:

* the impact changing the language around menopause for women can have.

* Who Will We Be? Personal growth fueled by the power to explore with intention and purpose.

* the body:brain connection and the importance of appreciating our brains are calling the shots - hormones driving behaviour change and responses. Rather than seeing these life stages as driven by our reproductive organs alone.

* Life after the Fertility Phase of our 20’s and 30’s. The fear of letting go of how we were in that stage of life (where the focus was on how we looked in order to ‘hunt the right sperm’) our identity then, to embrace how we are in The Upgrade. The tensions we feel when society says we should be this way and that, but inside we feel another. Being true to ourselves.

* The 6 Stages of The Upgrade - so many transitions:

* Looks

* Sex

* Loss

* Death Anxiety

* Facing Dying &

* Planning for a Good Death.

Wanting More?

Buy The Book: ‘The Upgrade - how the female brain gets stronger and better in midlife and beyond’ by Dr Louann Brizendine where ever you get you good books from. Here is where you can find it on her website and at the same time, found out more about this incredible woman.

Related Topics: In our podcast, Midlife Unfiltered, we’ve invited guests to chat with us about many of the topics mentioned in this book.

* Identity in Midlife & Beyond - with guests Cat Matson & Alex Hanlon

* Where We Fear To Tread - let’s talk about death

* Facing Death - with end of life doula Jacqui Williams

* Grief (& Loss) - there’s more to it than death

We also have episodes talking about Menopause from different perspectives with guest experts - a naturopath and menopause coach, integrative doctor, women’s health GP, Clinical Psychologist (women’s health specialty) as well as personal stories of women who have each had a very different Transition experience - medically induced, surgically induced, ‘natural’, and early transition. Find them all on our Midlife Unfiltered page here on Substack.

If you’ve enjoyed this episode of Midlife Unfiltered, share the love! We’d be most appreciative too. To your brilliant Upgrade.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Anita xx

In this chat Anita shares the one signifcant thing that has reversed her osteoporosis and how she knows it to be so.

Anita talks about REMS bone scanning and how that assessment tool has given her more helpful, accurate information about her bone health (in ways that DEXA had not in the past).

We also talk about something that is often not included in converstaions about bone health that should be because of the impact it has. Agency & hope.

Anita is proof that we have the power to better our bone health in ways that are empowering - that fuels our belief that it’s possible and the hope that we absolutely can.

Links:

In this chat we mention where you can go to get Anita’s free Bone Health Series on her blog and video pages over at her other world at Sequins and Sand. A world that’s in transition just as she is :)

Anita produces a weekly health and wellness newsletter Midlife Mojo - helping women to fill the many health gaps, encouraging us to be our own health advocates to fill those gaps.

If you’d like to subscribe to receive those each week then head here to the VIP section on Sequins and Sand.

Eventually she will move it to Substack. It’s in the pipeline :)

Get a REMS bone scan and find out your bone health status. In Australia head to Echolight.com.au; In other countries around the world ‘Google’ REMS bone scan and your country or local area to find out where to go. REMS stands for Radiofrequency Echographic Multi Spectrometry and is ultrasound and radio frequency signals based. A very different technology to QUS (Quantitative Bone Ultrasound) and DEXA (DXA - Dual-Energy X-ray Absorptiometry) and is radiation free.

If you’ve enjoyed this episode of Midlife Unfiltered please share it on. Let’s all get bone health savvy!

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Anita & Erica xx

Brodee found out the hard way that she had osteoporosis when she broke her ankle whilst jogging. Though because of her age (she was 55 at the time), she considers it her lucky break. Osteoporosis had revealed itself to her and her GP. Otherwise fit and healthy, she had time and options to turn this around. And turn it around she did.

She admits she should have had her bone health on her radar because her mother had the disease and she has a smaller, slight build. Both are risk factors for osteoporosis. And so should have her GP. A doctor she had been seeing for years—she should have twigged too.

So off for a DEXA bone scan she went and the diagnosis was confirmed - osteoporosis.

What was her next move? She gathered her bone health team together and formulated her Bone Health plan. Within 5 years Brodee had overturned that diagnosis of osteoporosis (The Big O). Her bone mineral density scan now shows her to be out of the osteoporosis range, and sitting within the "normal" range for her hips, significantly reducing her hip fracture risk. Her spine measurements have also vastly improved to be borderline normal/osteopenic—osteopenia being a milder form of bone loss that carries lower fracture risk than osteoporosis.

It’s a brilliant outcome that's not only reduced her fracture risk but also boosted her strength and confidence, fueling her mission to help women discover their enormous agency over aging.

We talk about how she turned her diagnosis around and how having a Bone Health Plan was central to that. How having agency in executing that plan is nourishing for our mental and our overall health.

We chat about the gaps in women’s health, between our health and life spans and how the health system is letting us down. How being our own health advocates needs to be a priority to fill those gaps…for ‘Future You’. Bone scans are important—a way to understand what your Bone Health status is. We go there too in our conversation. DEXA has been used for 40 years to know bone mineral density but it has its short-comings.

New technology is on the rise. REMS bone scans which give a Fragility Score tells us how strong our bones are (bone quality) independent of bone mineral density (T-Scores). Brodee’s going to get one of those done too and compare it to DEXA. That could be a great part 2 chat :)

We talk about the game changing impact the right exercises done the right way can have; backed up by brilliant research work of fellow Aussie Dr Belinda Beck and her now international ONERO exercise program.

Brodee’s story is truly inspirational. One that is the very definition of ‘it is possible’ and that we absolutely can.

Join us as Brodee shares her very honest, from the heart story so that you may have hope if yours is similar.

It’s a reminder to put your Bone Health high on your priority list as you age with power.

‘Future You’ will absolutely thank you for it.

It’s a key component of her mission to help us age with vibrancy and power. A mission she’s bringing to life with her Road Trip To Younger magazine. It’s brilliant. Find out more about that on Brodee’s Substack here, including her Build Your Bones series, coming soon.

Thanks so much Brodee for your time, your wisdom and your care. Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video!

Join me for my next live video in the app.

Anita xx

p.s. Oh! If you found this conversation helpful, please consider sharing it on. It’s how this podcast and its ageing with power information, grows grows and reaches out to others.

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Below are links to things we spoke about in our chat you might want to check out further:

Road Trip To Younger magazine - with Brodee Myers-Cooke

ONERO exercise program specifically designed for better bone health

REMS Bone Scans - find out more about it and where to have a scan done near you. They’re in the US, UK, Europe and Australia.

Her decision point: To accept the label and let it define her. Or permit herself to use it as a foundation on which to build a deeper understanding of who she is. Sitting in the discomfort of the unknown and step by step seeing what’s hidden, with an open heart, compassion and curiosity. Exploring. Wanting to know more.

She talks about the push and pull of ADHD and Autism and the ways in which they are felt and expressed.

The masking, pretending, squashing down because of not fitting into a world that isn’t designed for being that way.

The need to feel seen and understood. Belonging.

A future where the definition of ADHD and Autism is bound to shift because it’s more common than we realise.

It’s complicated. We’re human - of course it is :)

It really is a beautiful conversation.

If you want to know more about Erica’s diagnosis journey then she goes deeper in a dedicated a podcast episode over in her Self-Kind world. Find it here.

Erica also spoke about Lindsey Mackereth (find her here on Substack) - and her brilliant work in neurocomplexity and AUDHD. Thank you Lindsey.

We've also spoken about Identity in Midlife with Alex & Cat. It's another juicy chat. It's here.

How about you? Like Erica have you wondered whether you are wired with ADHD or/and Autistic traits? Masking who you are, to fit into this world?

Join us. Share a thought or two.

We’ll be talking more about this topic in future episodes :)

Thank you so much.

Anita xx

Personally we know of quite a few women with recent ADHD diagnoses in midlife so we are super curious.

Why is it on the rise for midlife women? Why now? How do you know if you are ADHD? And then what?

Kirstin helps women in midlife with their mental health and she’s very familiar with the topic.

She dispells common myths around what it is, and isn’t and she shares many valuable insights and practicle help.

Join Us: So if you are curious about ADHD join us for this brilliant chat with Kirstin. Please let’s have the conversation. Share your thoughts and experiences. We learn so much from each other.

More About Kirstin: If you’d like to know more about Kirstin, her work and how she may be able to help you then please head here to All About Her, Kirstin’s fabulous world dedicated to helping midlife women and their mental health.

Oh! Here’s a link to podcast chat we had previously about Menopause and Mental Health - how our minds, thoughts and behaviours change in this tumultuous time of life. We talk about how our mental health is often mis or undiagnosed and what we can do to empower ourselves to get the help we need.

Thanks so much.

Anita & Erica xx

p.s. If you have enjoyed this chat and think others might too, please share it on :)

The more specific we can be when identifying our emotions and experiences around them, the better equiped we are to understand what we’re feeling - giving us strong anchor points in the often tumuluos seas of midlife.

Erica encourages her counseling clients to use this book too - a ready reference to turn to again and again for clarity and exploration. I find myself doing the same.

Maybe you would too. Maybe you already do.

What emotions have you felt more deeply in midlife? Are they new? Some more frequently felt? Let us know :)

Find out more about Atlas of the Heart here on BreneBrown.com. There are links to where you can buy it over there too. In Australia? Here is where you can buy it. And if you’re across the ditch in NZ, head here.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app. If you enjoyed this chat, please shard it on.

Many thanks. Anita xx

Do you know your bone health status? Do you know if you have poor bone health? I’m almost 58 and have osteoporosis. Diagnosed about 7 years ago after one of my parathyroid glands grew a benign tumour, causing it to be grossly over-active - a condition called hyperparathyroidism. So bone health is a topic close to my heart.

With 67% of Australians over the age of 50 (both men and women) estimated to have sub-optimal bone health, it should be your high on your priority list of things to know about your health as you age (Healthy Bones Australia). And Australia is not unique. You will find similar statistics in many other parts of the world like Europe, North America and Asia.

Why should you care about your bone health status? Becasue when we measure for bone health we are measuring for bone fracture risk. Poorer bone health substancially increases our chance of fracturing bones that not only significally impact our mobility and independence, they can result in us dying sooner too. 1 in 4 hip fractures will result in death within 12 months of that fracture (Australian Institute of Health and Welfare).

My DEXA Scan Results Were Misleading: Reading a tonne of information on the subject AND having had wildly different DEXA* scan results (one of which my endocrinologist said we couldn’t use because of its unrealistic difference) I started searching for other ways to measure my bone health status more reliably. *(DEXA(Dual-Energy X-ray Absorptiometry), is a medical imaging test that measures bone density and is the scan typically done when assessing bone health status).

That’s when I discovered REMS (Radiofrequency Echographic MultiSpectrometry) scanning. It looks like an ultrasound machine and is used in a similar way. Not only did it give me a very clear understanding of my Bone Density, it also gave me an understanding of my Bone Strength (bone quality) AND it also gave me a Fragility Score - the likelihood of my bones fracturing because of their strength and density. More information than I got from DEXA. And because of the way in which the machine software is set up, the risk of inaccurate readings is significantly reduced.

That’s why I invited Dr David Tognarini to join me on the Midlife Unfiltered podcast. He has brought this technology into Australia. Technology that has been in use in clinical practice Italy and parts of Europe for about 6 years and in the USA and Canada for a bit less than that.

We talk about bone health and how REMS technology can help us better understand our bone health status, our fracture risk and because of its mobility (this device can be put in the overhead compartment of a plane!) has the ability to help those in circumstances and situations where getting to a DEXA scanner is not possible or very difficult.

It’s a great chat I’m sure you’ll learn a lot from. Your bone health matters. It’s often not diagnosed until it’s too late to do something about beyond taking medications. As a woman, we are at greater risk of poor bone health due to our 10-20% bone mass loss in per-menopause and menopause years.

If you haven’t yet, get a bone scan done and know your bone health status NOW. Future you will thank you for it.

Enjoy the show!

Anita xx

Research Links:

Technology like this takes years to develop and effectiveness and reliability proven. Here are links to research papers that discuss this in further detail.

All the key plications below and also other papers in specific patient populations are listed here:

https://echolight.com.au/specifications/

For specific references:

TGA Registration Certificate: https://www.tga.gov.au/resources/artg/344830

Recent (2024) European Consensus statement –

Fuggle N et al 2024. REMS in the diagnosis and management of osteoporosis: state of the art. Aging Clin Exp Res 36, 135. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40520-024-02784-w#citeas

Fragility Score Prospective study

Pisani P et al (2023). Fragility Score: a REMS-based indicator for the prediction of incident fragility fractures at 5 years. Aging Clin Exp Res. 2023 Apr;35(4):763-773. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10115670/

To Find a REMS Clinic in Australia:

https://echolight.com.au/booking/

Bone Compass clinics are here – www.bonecompass.com.au

To Find a REMS Clinic near you:

To find REMS clinics where ever you live in the world ‘Google’ search REMS Echolight technology and your city/country.

How did it change our lives? What did we learn? How have we joined the dots with breathing and other aspects of our lives and knowledge?

* Breathing has direct access to our nervous system - the power of the long exhale. 3 breaths later I had completely relaxed (Anita).

* Nasal breathing - no waking with dry mouth (from mouth breathing when I slept) AND it has wiped out my snoring! I now tape my lips together when I sleep to ensure I nasal breathe (Anita).

* We breathe more efficiently using our nose not our mouth. And it slows our rate of breathing down too.

* We don’t get oxygen hungry (when we can’t hold our breath for long), we become less tolerant of carbon dioxide.

* Our nasal cavity is lined with the same sorts of cells as we have in the penis, clitoris and nipples! Different functions for sure but there is a link.

* Nitric Oxide - nasal breathing promotes this - the importance of this vital gas we produce to help our cardio vascular health and so many other bodily systems.

* How we breathe impacts our bony skeleton. People with scoliosis have changed their spine shape with purpose designed breath work and movement. Hard and soft palettes, face shape - influenced by how we breathe!

* We take in about 25,000 breaths and 14kg of air a day. Consistent action (like breathing) will have an influence on our body. Mind blowing - we don’t think of it that way.

In the book James outlines not only the scientific facts and professional practices he talks of the ancient art of breathwork and the various ways to breathe for effect and impact.

We also acknowledge there is a spectrum of different ways to breathe - breathing practices. Some are easy to access and do, others we need to work up to. Start out slow and learn as you go - with curiosity. It’s wise to get professional support if you’re wanting to go deeper faster, because it can bring out unexpected reactions (to trauma for example). Respect the breath.

What if we could consciously breathe in ways that are best for our health, just like we consciously choose the best foods to eat? Our health and wellness would benefit greatly.

Breathing right influences our life and health spans - because from the age of about 30 our lung capacity starts to decline/reduce. But like our muscles and bones, we CAN change that with conscious action and practice.

Breathwork is something we ALL have access to. It’s free. Available any time. What other forms of ways to look after ourselves, can do that?

How are you breathing?

Go out and grab this book. It’s a life changing read. Find it on Jame’s website as well as online wherever you get your great books from.

https://www.mrjamesnestor.com/

"Our breath is a beautiful, healing, mysterious gift, and so is this book. I already feel like it’s going to change my life." Elizabeth Gilbert

Amen Elizabeth. We couldn’t agree more. It did for us. I’m sure it will for you too.

Thank you James.

Erica & Anita xx

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for my next live video in the app.

What is my body trying to tell me?

In a society that prides itself of productivity, we are taught it a sign of strength to push through, push that feeling down and get on with it…it’s be okay. What BS!

Our body is the barometer and it will never lie. It will give us cues before we have conscious awareness. It’s being protective of you, protective to what it perceives as unsafe. It also sends cues to check that things are still okay.

Often we don’t listen until it’s too late. Until the compounded tension has built up to a point where it’s challenging to come down. Think burnout. But stress is a spectrum and if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person like Erica is, that can be a very challenging place to be.

So what do you do?

In a nutshell, move. Movement snacks. And like any change, it begins with awareness. Be compassionate with yourself, kind to yourself and begin to listen to your body’s language. The fidgets, the tension, the pain and move that area. Feel it in your shoulders? Take a minute to roll them back. Numb bum? Get up and walk around, stretch it out.

Erica walks you through a few examples in this video too.

She has many movement snacks for different body areas. Find them all on her YouTube channel and on her blog. Like this one (an oldie but a goodie).

There’s nothing wrong with your body. It’s trying to tell you something. Flip that belief if you have it and celebrate the fact that you’re noticing!

Pay attention. Take action. Move. We are made to move and it doesn’t need to be much. Always with kindness, with compassion because when we do that, everything feels safe.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

Anita & Erica

FEAR of fracture is what holds you back when you’re osteoporotic. And that’s been supported for many years by the medical profession - that lifting heavy weights would put us at greater risk of fracture. But that view is starting to change. Bone needs force to grow. Recent research by Australia’s Dr Belinda Beck in her LIFTMOR study has shown that loading bones with the right exercises, twice a week for 30 minutes can substantially improve bone health - bone mineral density and strength.

“I’d never been in the gym prior to working out with weights for my bone health. I started in 2022, not really enjoying it much to begin with. Knowing it was going to help my bones drove me out the door and into the gym for a tailored session with my physiotherapist. Trained in not only what to do, but how to do it correctly. And she knows my health history.” (Anita)

"Anita, you're an athlete!" my physio Marie shouted out with glee when I lifted 50kg (112 pounds) and box jumped 60cm for the first time. I must admit, I am very proud of me too. I have NEVER heard those words spoken about me before. Gradually increasing the weights I’m lifting, the heights I’m jumping over time….since 2022.

It’s enormously empowering - I have done this (with the right help and support). Something taking a pill never does. We’re not anti-medication. But we are pro-exercise because, it works.

We talk about in our chat…

* The power of exercise for bone health

* Anita’s osteoporosis diagnosis and journey so far

* Erica’s crohns disease and being osteopenic

* Getting a DEXA or REMS scan of your bones is too late at 65+ - prevention is so important

* Exercising - bone loading the right way for your bone health

* How to choose the right place that feels right for you to lift weights and the right people to support you to do it.

Anita writes a weekly newsletter - Midlife Mojo. She’s is in the middle of her Bone Health series. Last week’s edition focused on Exercise for bone health. Here’s a link to it if you’d like to read it. In there you’ll find information on Dr Beck’s studies and other links to bone health resources.

Here’s to you and your bone health. There is so much you can do. The power is with you.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app next Monday.

We also make reference to a podcast chat that really opened Anita's eyes and perspective on Beauty - Beauty in the USA. A chat between Alyssa Vingan from 'The New Guarde' and Jessica DeFino from 'The Review of Beauty' both here on Substack.

Catch The New Guarde here: https://thenewgarde.substack.com/?utm_source=global-search

The Review of Beauty here: https://jessicadefino.substack.com/

See you next week!

Anita & Erica.

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video! Join us for our next live video in the app.

We’re curious. What are your pre-conceived ideas and thoughts about India?

In this conversation we are confident some of those perceptions will be busted

Have you been to India? Why did you travel there? Is your family from India? What would you like to share?

—-

Thank you to everyone who tuned into our live video. Join us for our next live video in the app.

Anita and Erica xx

Thank you for watching our live video! And if you’re listening on the Podcast, thank you to you too.

Towards the end of this chat we talk about being on your own side. How honouring our values and beliefs can help us ride the waves of midlife - with self-compassion. This is something that Erica will be teaching in her next round of SOMA:HOME . Learn the tools and skills to help you:

* Befriend your sensitivity (and embrace its gifts)

* Manage overwhelm with more confidence (the downward spiral is not your only option)

* Show up for self-caring practices (even if they never seem to stick)

Find out more about SOMA:HOME here on https://www.ericawebb.com.au/soma-home.

See you next Monday for our weekly raw and real ‘fireside’ chats. We’d love it if you’d join us then too.

Anita & Erica xx

A: "Why didn't we have the conversation?"

Dr: "Because you weren't showing any menopause symptoms."

RED FLAGS ladies!

In this 'about real life' chat Anita and Erica talk about:

1. The importance of advocating for yourself. To be heard. To get the right health outcomes for you - because there are gaps in women's health - gaps in knowledge and in treatment know-how...even in specialty fields like endocrinology.

2. Backing yourself in that chat with your health professional - think about what you want to walk away with from that meeting - write it down and take those notes in with you so you can achieve your aim. Don't make yourself small. With respect, stay open and curious.

3. Because of my own reading and discussion with my GP, I had learned that MHT (Menopause Hormone Therapy) where it's appropriate, is endorsed by clinicians in Australia for post-menopausal women, even if we are not experiencing any symptoms. Is it the same in other countries? My endocrinologist did not talk about this option with me.

4. Time to change specialists. Choosing an endocrinologist who specialised in women's health and menopause with an interest in bone health.

5. What Anita's new endocrinologist has done for her already and how different the experience has been. Blood work and xrays.

For those who are curious, here is a link to Australia's "Practitioner's Toolkit for the Menopause" which includes a General Guide for Bone Health Assessment and management for post menopausal women with no minimal trauma fracture and aged 65 years or younger. It's on page 10.

Soon, In the podcast we will feature a Bone Health Series so look out for that ladies.

We'd love to hear from you if you've switched doctors or found a new one because of a health gap in your treatment experience. We're eager to tell 'in real life' stories of women on our podcast. Maybe that's you. Simply email us at hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au and let's take it from there.

Thanks for listening. Share it on if you found it helpful or think someone you respect will too. Leave your thoughts as a comment or email us. Soooo many options :)

To your midlife health and being your own health advocate.

Anita & Erica xx

If you're a woman in midlife, you'll absolutely know what we're talking about.

Midlife Unfiltered - The Season of me is about taking back your power and choosing yourself in this often challenging but also incredibly liberating time of life.

We explore often taboo topics and bust outdated stereotypes. Have conversations with experts and other women who openly share their midlife experiences too - so you know you're not alone. No woman should feel alone. Conversations that help to broaden your perspectives and with that, explore new possibilities, widen your awareness and deepen your understanding about stuff that matters.

Season 1 - Future You covered - the foundational topics that we believe will help us stand strong as we transition.

Season 2 - The Disruption. Stuff that happens from the inside like the Menopause Transition. And the disruption that happens 'to' us; those things that hit us from the outside.

You will hear:

What this podcast is about and the topics we've covered so far in our 2 Seasons. Some we talk about briefly, others are simply listed out.

Season 1: Future You

Ep #1 - Future You

Ep #2 - Great Expectations

Ep #3 - Curiosity

Ep #4 - Making Space - with guests Cat Matson and Alex Hanlon

Ep #5 - Death - Where We Fear To Tread

Ep #6 - Death - with End of Life Doula Jacqui Williams

Ep #7 - Grief - More Than Death

Ep #8 - Joy - with guest Anne Maree Wilshire

Season 2: The Disruption

Ep #1 - The Disruption - Intro

Ep #2 - The Menopause Transition - with women's health expert and GP Dr Kelly Teagle

Ep #3 - The Menopause Transition Without HRT - with naturopath and menopause expert Angel Counsel

Ep #4 - The Menopause Transition an Integrative Medicine Approach - with Dr Karen Coates

Ep #5 - The Psychology of Menopause - with Dr Kirstin Bouse

Ep #6 - Her Story - Part 1 - Liz and Lyndal's openly share their Menopause Transition stories; Part 2 - Tina, Cynthia and Natalia openly share their Menopause Transition stories

Ep #7 - Being a Pattern Interruptor in Midlife - with Katy Abbott

Ep #8 - Stress and Your Nervous System - with Erica and Anita

Ep #9 - Body Image in Midlife - with Anita & Erica

Ep #10 - Identity in Midlife - with guests Cat Matson and Alex Hanlon

Ep#11 - Does Where We Die Make A Difference? - with guest End Of Life Doula Jacqui Williams

Ep #12 - Our Midlife Disruption Stories - Anita & Erica

Ep #13 - Midlife Career Disruption - with guest Wendy Alexander, Career Coach & Author

Ep #14 - Self-Compassion in Midlife - with Erica & Anita

What's coming up next for Midlife Unfiltered - The Season of Me.

How you can be involved - Share your midlife story; suggest expert guests.

Don’t forget to subscribe to us on Substack and grab your free (and very handy) Season 2 Midlife Unfiltered workbook:

Subscribe Here >> https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Mentioned in this Episode:

We'd love to hear from you!

Email us if you'd like to share your midlife story, if there's someone you think we should chat to or what you'd like us to chat about. We're all ears!

e: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

Subscribe to Midlife Unfiltered on Substack and be notified with a short email about when our next Video conversation will be and when we've released a new podcast Episode. No need to think...it just happens :)

https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings - to feel confident in midlife.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat about self-compassion as a powerful tool for supporting your midlife ups and downs.

You will hear:

* What self-compassion is (and isn’t)

* The ‘how-to’ of self-compassion

* Why compassion and ‘niceness’ are not the same thing and how you might be confusing them

* Why your capacity for outward compassion is tied to your ability to offer it inward

* And more.

Don’t forget to join us on Substack and grab your Season 2 Midlife Unfiltered workbook:

Mentioned in this Episode:

Kristin Neff’s self-compassion research and writing: https://self-compassion.org/the-research/

Connect with Erica:

https://www.ericawebb.com.au

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat with Wendy Alexander from Happy Career Hub about the disruptions Wendy has experienced and how, in midlife, she finally gave herself permission to build her career exactly as she wanted.

You will hear:

* Wendy’s experiences navigating menopause and its impact on her career (they were big and sometimes very, very challenging)

* The challenges and opportunities surrounding menopause, particularly in the workplace

* Wendy’s advice around the need for open conversations and safe spaces conversations about menopause and its impacts, including in the workplace.

* Discussion around the need for corporate support for midlife women. Wendy’s transition from corporate life to helping others navigate their careers - which stemmed from her own midlife journey.

Don’t forget to join us on Substack and grab your Season 2 Midlife Unfiltered workbook: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

About our guest, Wendy Alexander:

Wendy, from Happy Career Hub, is an Interview and Career Coach who helps people look so good that hiring managers can’t ignore them. She is also the author of the book Internal Uprising: Reclaiming Your Voice And Wisdom Through Midlife, Menopause And Beyond which you can find here.

Connect with Wendy via her website, https://happycareerhub.com/ and on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendyaalexander/

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me.

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat about the disruptions they’ve experienced in midlife (so far!).

You will hear:

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me.

In this episode, join Anita McLachlan (flying solo as host - Erica was in another important call) as she chats with End of Life Doula Jacqui Williams about where we die and whether it matters. You will hear:

* Why we need to educate people about their options regarding death.

* Why planning for death is essential, but expectations may not always align with reality.

* How conversations about death should happen early and often.

* Why not everyone will have the opportunity to die at home, and that's okay.

* The tools and resources are available to help families navigate end-of-life care.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

Workshops with Jacqui Williams - Let’s Talk About It

Episode 6, Season 1 of Midlife Unfiltered: Facing Death with guest Jacqui Williams, end of life doula

Book: The Gift of a Good Death by Lisa Twigg

App: Gather My Crew

Advanced Care Planning Australia

Jacqui talks about the Sunflower graphic which is a helpful, easy to use resource to help the team who may be helping your loved one as they are in their care, appreciate them as a person, not a bed number. Find that here.

About our guest, Jacqui Williams:

Jacqui Williams is an End of Life Doula and Funeral Celebrant in the Brisbane, Redlands and Sunshine Coast Area.

Website: https://endoflifetransitions.com.au/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/end_of_life_transitions

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me.

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat with their guests, Alex Hanlon and Cat Matson about identity in Midlife.

You will hear:

- About the complexities of identity in midlife, including how how personal roles, societal expectations, and cultural influences shape our sense of self.

- The disruption that often accompanies this life stage, the importance of values, and the role of role models in navigating identity shifts.

- The role of introspection and the acceptance of uncertainty as we redefine who we are beyond our professional and familial roles.

- Societal perceptions of midlife crises, and the power of storytelling in shaping self-perception.

- The need for compassion, acceptance, and the creation of space for self-discovery and reflection.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About our guests:

Alex HanlonCat Matson

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

Time Stamps:

00:00 Defining Identity in Midlife

02:47 The Disruption of Identity

05:45 Shifting Perspectives on Roles

08:56 The Essence of Who We Are

11:56 Role Models and Their Influence

14:53 Cultural Perspectives on Identity

17:53 Values and Their Impact on Identity

20:57 The Complexity of Identity Formation

23:50 Navigating Relationships and Identity

27:14 The Great Unraveling of Identity

30:01 Discovering and Creating Identity

32:50 Embracing the Unknown

37:59 Recognizing Personal Values and Mission Statements

39:53 The Unique Experience of Grief and Identity

41:45 Excavating Identity Through Life Experiences

44:43 The Impact of Teenage Years on Identity

48:58 Midlife Reflections: Crisis or Opportunity?

51:40 The Power of Stories in Shaping Identity

57:51 Compassion and Acceptance in Midlife

01:01:11 Creating Space for Self-Discovery

01:05:52 Questions for Reflection and Growth

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat about body image in midlife. You will hear:

* Anita’s and Erica’s personal experiences with body image in midlife

* Why and how societal expectations surrounding beauty can impact body image in midlife

* The role of self-compassion in navigating body image challenges in midlife

* The value of prioritising function over appearance 

* Why open discussions about body image can be supportive for the individual and the collective.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

Time Stamps:

00:00 Exploring Body Image in Midlife

03:57 Personal Reflections on Change

09:57 The Gray Hair Dilemma

13:47 Societal Expectations and Beauty Standards

19:58 Function Over Appearance

26:11 Navigating Conversations About Body Image

32:06 The Importance of Self-Compassion

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they chat about stress and your nervous system.

You will hear:

- Why, when your doctor tells you to reduce stress, it might not be exactly what you think.

- The difference between a stressor and the experience of stress.

- Simple practices that can make a huge difference to your experiences (without relying on your stressors disappearing into the abyss).

- The role of self-compassion in navigating stress.

- And so much more.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

Burnout: The Secret to Solving the Stress Cycle

Substack Article: Meet your new post-40 nervous system by Maryann Jacobsen

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps:

00:00 Understanding Modern Stressors

02:55 The Nature of Stress and Its Impact

05:50 The Role of the Nervous System

08:47 Internal vs External Stressors

12:07 Managing Stress: Moving Between States

15:02 Completing the Stress Cycle

17:54 Practical Strategies for Stress Management

29:11 Navigating Stress and Recovery

36:51 The Importance of Self-Compassion

44:27 Turning Inward: A Midlife Reflection

50:11 Resources for Managing Stress

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat with our guest, Composer Katy Abbott about the disruptions of midlife; from personal challenges to self-discovery, and the journey of finding one's voice. 

You will hear:

- How Katy transformed her life to align with her true values 

- The power of vulnerability

- The significance of taking radical responsibility

- What being a pattern interruptor has meant

- And so much more.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About our guest, Dr Katy Abbott:

Dr Katy Abbott is a composer whose compositions have been performed, published and recorded around the world, brought to life by many leading ensembles and orchestras.

As a gifted storyteller, Katy Abbott brings to light the profound in the ordinary – exploring connection, grief, humour and awe at meta and micro levels and in a way that connects the shared human experience between performers and audience. Her music frequently exhibits a cheeky humour and cleverly juxtaposes contemporary textures on traditional settings.

Connect with Katy:

Website

Instagram

LinkedIn

Mentioned in this Episode:

Hidden Thoughts™ Series - learn more here

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps:

00:00 Introduction to Midlife Unfiltered

01:40 Meet Our Guest: Katie Abbott

03:46 Katie's Journey: From Uncertainty to Music

07:24 Finding Her Voice Through Music

15:42 Hidden Thoughts: Giving Voice to the Unspoken

28:32 Creating a Life Built for You

30:42 Embracing the Unknown: Approving Mystery

31:02 Finding Strength in Vulnerability

32:47 Experimenting with Life: New Beginnings

34:42 Discovering Radical Responsibility

36:31 Aligning with True Values

39:32 Building Capacity: Alone Time and Self-Care

42:49 Making Bold Choices: Selling the House

46:35 The Journey of Self-Discovery

49:33 The Power of Connection and Support

52:40 Conclusion: Sharing the Gift with the World

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, Erica sits down to chat with three women who have very different stories when it comes to their menopause transitions. 

We hear from Tina who unknowingly faced the challenges of perimenopause through her late 40s; Cynthia who was surprised to learn she’d gone through that transition in her early 40s; and Natalya who transitioned into menopause overnight as the result of surgery - at just 28 years old.

A huge thank you to our guests who shared so generously and honestly. We appreciate you.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Oh, and if you missed Part 1 of our ‘shared stories in menopause’ episode, we highly recommend heading back and tuning in! Anita chats with Lyndal and Liz about their stories in Episode 6, Part 1.

Next time? Another woman’s story … Stay tuned.

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, Anita is chatting with two women - Lyndal and Liz (both in their early 50s) - about their menopause transitions. We hear about the bits that were challenging, the sometimes surprising silver-linings, and so much more. 

Lyndal has gone through the menopause transition ‘naturally’ - without surgical intervention. Liz’s story is different - having had a partial hysterectomy and further surgery. Both women generously share their experiences with Anita and we are so grateful for their time and vulnerability. 

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

After listening to Part 1, be sure to check out Part 2 where Erica chats with 3 more women - Tina, Cynthia and Natalya - about their menopause transition stories.

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

What is the psychology of menopause? And how can our mental health be impacted? We’ve found the expert to ask, and we’re excited to share this conversation with you.

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat with our guest, Clinical Psychologist Kirstin Bouse about the myths and emotions surrounding menopause, the psychological and mental health challenges women face during this transition, and the importance of a holistic, self-compassionate approach. 

You will hear:

- The similarities between perimenopause and adolescence

- The critical need for proper support and advocacy in midlife

- The value of symptom tracking

- Why normalising the menopause experience is important

- when to seek support for psychological and mental health impacts

- And so much more.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About our guest, Kirstin Bouse:

Kirstin Bouse is a clinical psychologist (with nearly 3 decades of experience!) and founder of All About Her - The Centre for Menopause. Kirstin is a champion for midlife women and all-in when it comes to understanding and supporting women through the years of perimenopause and beyond. 

Connect with Kirstin:

All About Her Website

LinkedIn

Instagram: The Midlife Psychologist and All About Her

Mentioned in this Episode:

Australasian Menopause Society

Balance App By Louise Newson

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Grab your season Notebook at Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps:

00:00 Understanding the Menopause Transition

00:33 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered

01:07 Introducing Kirstin Bouse

01:47 Kirstin's Background and Experience

04:43 The Launch of All About Her

06:21 Challenges Women Face During Menopause

07:54 The Psychology of Menopause

12:05 Mental Health vs. Psychology of Menopause

18:07 Navigating the Menopause Transition

31:29 The Importance of Self-Compassion

36:47 The Role of Self-Compassion in Therapy

37:37 Mental Health Implications of Menopause

38:25 Misdiagnosis and Hormonal Treatments

42:09 Statistics and Mental Health Awareness

45:50 Recognizing and Addressing Mental Health Issues

57:35 Seeking Professional Help and Self-Advocacy

01:08:27 Resources and Support for Midlife Women

01:11:21 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat with our guest, Integrative Medical Doctor Karen Coates, about the essential knowledge we need to manage our midlife health and wellbeing.

You will hear:

- The impact of stress hormones on a woman’s biochemistry, especially in midlife

- The role of estrogen and progesterone in the menopause transition

- The benefits of bioidentical hormones

- Why lifestyle choices, including diet and exercise, can make a difference

- The role of Vitamin D, insulin and cortisol

- And so much more.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About our guest, Dr Karen Coates:

An expert on women’s health, Dr Karen lectures internationally on nutrition and health issues, as well as hosting seminars at Australia’s leading health retreat and World’s Best Eco Spa, Gwinganna. Dr Karen has degrees in medicine and surgery and postgraduate qualifications in nutrigenomics, obstetrics, and nutritional and environment medicine. She is passionate about her work with clients in the areas of fertility, hormones, optimal wellness and weight loss and has made it her ‘mission’ to help women take control of their health and achieve their wellness and fertility goals. Dr Karen’s is also an author. Her second book, How to Be Well: A Handbook for Women, was published in 2022.

Connect with Dr Karen via her website or on LinkedIn

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Get your free Season 2 Notebook by subscribing on Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

And how can nutrition, mindset and focusing on individual needs support us in our menopause transition? Our guest today helps us answer these questions!

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat with our guest - Angela Counsel, Clinical Naturopath - about navigating menopause without HRT.

You will hear:

- Why some women can’t or don’t want to turn to HRT

- The role of stress in the menopause transition and symptoms

- The impact of nutrition and lifestyle choices

- How to embrace our changing midlife bodies

- The importance of an empowered, personalised approach to the menopause transition.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

Angela’s Embrace Program: Australasia's Leading Health and Lifestyle Program For Women Transitioning Through Menopause. Learn more here: https://embracemenopause.com.au/embrace-program/

About our guest, Angela Counsel, Clinical Naturopath:

Angela Counsel is a leading Naturopath, Kinesiologist and Mindset Coach who specialises in helping women to navigate their menopause transition with ease.  She is on a mission to spread the word that menopause does not have to be a tough time in life, in fact it can be a time of stepping into your wisdom and falling in love with yourself and your life. Angela created the embrace Program; Australasia's Leading Health and Lifestyle Program For Women Transitioning Through Menopause.

Connect with Angela: 

Website: https://angelacounsel.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/angelacounsel/

Loved this episode? Share it with a friend, and let’s start some conversations.

And remember to grab your Midlife Unfiltered Season 2 Notebook to keep track of all those ‘aha’ moments and insights. You can download that by subscribing on Substack here: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps:

00:00 Introduction: Embracing Your Body with Compassion

00:38 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered

01:16 Meet Our Guest: Angela, the Menopause Expert

01:48 Understanding Menopause: The Disruption

03:26 Angela's Journey and Expertise

09:59 The Role of Stress in Menopause

14:13 The Impact of Lifestyle Choices

19:27 Navigating Weight and Health Concerns

27:56 Empowering Women: Education and Advocacy

33:18 Starting with Symptom Tracking

33:40 Understanding Triggers and Patterns

34:58 Mindset and Reframing Symptoms

36:32 The Competitive Nature of Symptoms

40:29 Epigenetics and Genetic Expression

49:48 Managing Menopause Stress

51:49 Embracing Change and Body Awareness

01:00:59 The Gift of Menopause

01:02:21 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Whether you’re on the other side of the menopause transition, navigating it now, or know it’s coming, this episode is a deep-dive into what you need to know about this time of life. The reality? The menopause transition can impact years (decades?) of a woman’s life.

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me.

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat with our guest, Dr Kelly Teagle, Women’s Health GP and founder of WellFemme about the menopause transition.

You will hear:

- The Menopause Transition basics - what symptoms might you experience and why?

- The importance of seeking specialised medical advice

- The significance of early intervention and preventative health measures

- The role of self-compassion

- And so much more.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Anita & Erica

P.S. Check below for links to learn more about Dr Kelly Teagle, WellFemme and the resources Dr Kelly mentioned during our chat.

Mentioned in this episode:

WellFemme: links to free menopausal health assessment and menopause bootcamp webinar

Blog post “5 top tips for “The Menopause Chat” with your GP.”

Next Phase

“What’s your future health forecast” Quiz

About our guest, Dr Kelly Teagle:

Dr. Kelly Teagle is a GP in Canberra specialising in Women’s health. She is the founder of WellFemme, a ground-breaking Telehealth menopause service. She graduated in Medicine from the University of Queensland in 2001 and worked in the Royal Australian Air Force as a Medical Officer until 2010. As a civilian GP she gained Fellowship of the Royal Australian College of General Practitioners and developed her interest in women’s medicine with a Graduate Diploma of Women’s Health, further studies in reproductive and sexual health and surgical assisting.

Connect with Dr Kelly Teagle via the WellFemme Website and LinkedIn.

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings. 

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps:

00:00 Introduction to Menopausal Transition

00:12 Meet the Hosts and Guest

00:57 Dr. Kelly Teagle's Background

03:19 Understanding Menopause: Basics and Misconceptions

03:56 Perimenopause: Symptoms and Challenges

14:18 Navigating Hormonal Treatments

22:06 Advocating for Women's Health

25:04 Senate Inquiry and Future Changes

28:32 Understanding Bone Health

28:53 The Importance of Preventive Health in Midlife

29:15 Strength Training and Bone Density

29:55 The Risks of Bone Fractures

30:27 Empowering Women Through Awareness

31:25 The Role of Lifestyle in Health

32:25 Introducing the Next Phase Program

33:04 Details of the Next Phase Program

33:24 The Window of Opportunity for Health

33:57 Preventing Chronic Diseases

41:06 The Importance of Self-Compassion

45:45 Body Image and Mindset Support

48:29 Final Thoughts and Takeaways

50:30 How to Connect and Learn More

Those disruptions are both internal (hello changing hormone levels) and external (changes in roles, for instance) but one thing’s for sure: disruption can be hard.

So, we’re here to talk about it!

We’re kicking off Season 2 of Midlife Unfiltered and we’ve called it The Disruption. In the first part of this season, it’s all about those internal disruptions of midlife - the menopause transition being just one of those.

This is Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. We’re thrilled you’re joining us for Season 2.

In this episode, join us - co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb - as we chat about The Disruption and what you can expect to hear during the season. That includes episodes about:

The Menopause Transition - where we hear from a number of women’s health experts and everyday women.

The psychology and mental health of midlife

Stress, Body Image and Sleep.

The emphasis this season is on being one's own health advocate and navigating the complexities of midlife with an open heart and mind. And, of course, on starting conversations.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

Get your free Season 2 workbook to to keep note of all those ‘aha’ moments and reminders of the next steps you want to take to advocate for your own midlife. You can grab that by signing up for our Midlife Unfiltered Substack here: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com

About your Midlife Unfiltered Hosts:

Anita McLachlan was at the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years. As Australia’s Cossie Whisperer, Anita has helped thousands of women find a swimsuit they feel great in and the freedom that comes with feeling confident in it. She’s now turning her experiences and attention to helping women in midlife navigate this often tumultuous time and feel the power this time of life brings.

Erica Webb is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges of being a sensitive human in an often insensitive world.

Connect with Anita and Erica at Midlife Unfiltered:

Substack: https://midlifeunfiltered.substack.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.auIf you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

Time Stamps

00:00 Introduction to Midlife Unfiltered

01:00 Reflecting on Season One

01:44 The Theme of Disruption

02:45 Conversations with Experts and Women

05:07 The Importance of Being Your Own Advocate

08:51 Upcoming Topics in Season Two

10:47 Encouragement and Final Thoughts

15:31 Invitation to Connect and Engage

> How joy can manifest differently in various stages of life. 

> Anne Maree’s personal experience of grappling with the reality of joy

> The difference between joy and happiness

> The importance of finding the ‘grains of gold’ rather than only looking for the ‘bars of gold’

> How to find joy beyond external validation

> The way joy can show up quietly.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

About our guest, Anne Maree Wilshire:

Anne Maree is the founder and CEO of Vibrant Voices. Through her work, she has been empowering speakers, leaders, Business owners and CEOs for over 25 years, to connect and engage deeply with the authentic voice and confidently speak with presence, credibility and persuasive power.

Connect with Anne Maree: Website: https://www.vibrantvoices.com.au/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemareewilshire/?originalSubdomain=au

Connect with Anita and Erica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

About Anita McLachlan:

At the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years, Anita has helped thousands of women feel more confident in their swimwear - and their bodies - as Australia’s Cossie Whisperer. She’s now turning her attention to supporting women in midlife to navigate this often tumultuous, but also very powerful time of life. Ultimately, her focus is now on supporting other midlife women to have the freedom and confidence to be themselves.

Connect with Anita:

Website: www.SequinsandSand.com.auFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/sequinsandsand.com.auLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anita-mclachlan-b307869/?originalSubdomain=auEmail: Anita@SequinsandSand.com.auPassion Project : www.CossieConfidence.com.au 

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:

Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. 

Connect with Erica:

Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they explore the landscape of grief in midlife and beyond. You will hear:

> An exploration of the multifaceted nature of grief; how it extends beyond death to encompass various life changes and losses. 

> Anita’s and Erica’s personal experiences with grief in the context of having a parent with dementia.

> How grief intertwines with love, memory, and identity. 

> The importance of acknowledging and leaning into grief with self-compassion.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Connect with Anita and Erica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

About Anita McLachlan:

At the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years, Anita has helped thousands of women feel more confident in their swimwear - and their bodies - as Australia’s Cossie Whisperer. She’s now turning her attention to supporting women in midlife to navigate this often tumultuous, but also very powerful time of life. Ultimately, her focus is now on supporting other midlife women to have the freedom and confidence to be themselves.

Connect with Anita:

Website : www.SequinsandSand.com.auFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/sequinsandsand.com.auLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anita-mclachlan-b307869/?originalSubdomain=auEmail : Anita@SequinsandSand.com.auPassion Project : www.CossieConfidence.com.au 

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:

Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. 

Connect with Erica:

Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/

Time Stamps:

00:00 Introduction to Midlife Unfiltered

01:03 Exploring the Concept of Grief

01:50 Personal Reflections on Grief

04:52 The Unexpected Beauty of Grief

14:26 The Long Goodbye: Dementia and Grief

21:17 Finding Light in the Darkness

39:10 Closing Thoughts and Gratitude

40:54 Stay Connected with Midlife Unfiltered

> What is an end of life doula?

> How do we normalise death in a society that is reluctant to discuss mortality?

> The importance of having end-of-life conversations, creating legacy letters, and building compassionate communities. 

> An exploration of the practical aspects of advanced care planning and the emotional landscape surrounding death.

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Mentioned in this episode:

End of Life Doula DirectoryPreparing the Way - Certificate IV End of Life DoulaAdvanced Care Planning Australia

About our guest, Jacqui Williams:

Jacqui Williams is an End of Life Doula and Funeral Celebrant in the Brisbane, Redlands and Sunshine Coast Area. 

Connect with Jacqui:

Website: https://endoflifetransitions.com.au/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/end_of_life_transitions

Connect with Anita and Erica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfilteredFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfilteredEmail: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

About Anita McLachlan:

At the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years, Anita has helped thousands of women feel more confident in their swimwear - and their bodies - as Australia’s Cossie Whisperer. She’s now turning her attention to supporting women in midlife to navigate this often tumultuous, but also very powerful time of life. Ultimately, her focus is now on supporting other midlife women to have the freedom and confidence to be themselves.

Connect with Anita:

Website : www.SequinsandSand.com.auFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/sequinsandsand.com.auLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anita-mclachlan-b307869/?originalSubdomain=auEmail : Anita@SequinsandSand.com.auPassion Project : www.CossieConfidence.com.au 

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:

Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. 

Connect with Erica:

Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/

Welcome to this episode of Midlife Unfiltered - a podcast about unapologetically embracing the Season of Me. 

In this episode, join co hosts Anita McLachlan and Erica Webb as they tread where so many are unwilling to go. You will hear:

> Why discussing death is so challenging despite its inevitability

> How death experiences have shaped Anita’s and Erica’s lives and perspectives

> The emotional complexities surrounding the topic of death

> The potential benefits of opening up conversations about mortality. 

We’re so glad you’re here. It’s time to live life on your terms. It’s time for Midlife Unfiltered.

Connect with Anita and Erica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.unfiltered

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/midlife.unfiltered

Email: hello@midlifeunfiltered.com.au

About Anita McLachlan:

At the helm of Sequins and Sand for over 15 years, Anita has helped thousands of women feel more confident in their swimwear - and their bodies - as Australia’s Cossie Whisperer. She’s now turning her attention to supporting women in midlife to navigate this often tumultuous, but also very powerful time of life. Ultimately, her focus is now on supporting other midlife women to have the freedom and confidence to be themselves.

Connect with Anita:

Website : www.SequinsandSand.com.au

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sequinsandsand.com.au

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anita-mclachlan-b307869/?originalSubdomain=au

Email : Anita@SequinsandSand.com.au

Passion Project : www.CossieConfidence.com.au 

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:

Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. 

Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. 

Connect with Erica:

Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.au

Email: erica@ericawebb.com.au

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkind

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/

Time Stamps:

00:00 Introduction: Embracing the Inevitable

01:27 Personal Experiences with Death

06:52 Cultural Perspectives on Death

13:22 Facing Our Mortality

15:34 Legacy and Ethical Wills

19:16 Looking Ahead: Conversations with an End-of-Life Doula

20:17 Conclusion and Next Steps

Connect with Anita:Sequins and Sand Website here you’ll find showcases of swimsuits and resortwear, fit tips, product reviews, insightful Masterclasses and Anita’s Unlock Your Cossie Confidence Course. Free VIP Community receive Anita’s much loved weekly newsletters - Midlife Mojo and the Swimsuit ScoopFacebookLinkedInEmail : Anita@SequinsandSand.com.auPassion Project  

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html 

About Erica Webb:Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. Connect with Erica:WebsiteEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagramLinkedInTime Stamps:00:00 Introduction to Midlife Motivation00:40 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered01:09 Meet Our Guests: Alex Hanlon and Kat Mattson04:52 Vision for Our 90-Year-Old Selves17:14 Exploring Shame and Self-Worth32:54 Navigating the Comparison Trap33:30 The Freedom of Swearing at 5034:07 The Rabbit Hole of Menopause35:15 The Liberation of Testosterone39:46 Morning Routines for Creating Space41:30 The Power of Meditation and Affirmations51:41 Adapting Morning Routines for Personal Growth55:23 Reflections on Life at 9059:41 Closing Thoughts and Gratitude

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html About Erica Webb:Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. Connect with Erica:Website Email: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram LinkedInTime Stamps:00:00 Introduction to Curiosity00:27 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered01:02 The Power of Curiosity02:03 Personal Stories of Curiosity05:28 Neuroscience of Curiosity08:21 Curiosity as a Superpower22:15 Exploring Curiosity with Letters from Love31:36 Curiosity Quiz and Recap34:

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html About Erica Webb:Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. Connect with Erica:Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/Time Stamps:00:00 Introduction: The Weight of Expectations00:40 Welcome to Midlife Unfiltered01:15 Diving into Shame03:14 The Big Questions of Midlife08:04 Personal Shame Stories11:05 Reflecting on Choices and Self-Worth17:28 Creating Space for Self-Discovery27:25 Overcoming Self-Doubt28:07 Embracing Solo Adventures28:57 The Power of Choosing Yourself29:15 Navigating Shame and Authenticity30:50 Breaking Free from Expectations33:07 The Journey of Self-Exploration42:10 The Importance of Curiosity44:19 Reflecting on Personal Stories46:29 Wrapping Up and Looking Ahead48:49 Stay Connected and Engaged

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html About Erica Webb:Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. Connect with Erica:Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/Time Stamps:00:00 Introduction to Midlife Unfiltered00:09 Embracing the Season of Me00:23 Internal Dialogue and Self-Worth00:40 Facing Midlif

If you enjoy the topics explored in this podcast and would like more, then sign up to receive Midlife Mojo, Anita's weekly Wednesday newsletter. In it, Anita explores health, wellness and the emotions of midlife to power-up your midlife and beyond. Because girl…you are just getting started :) Become a Sequins and Sand VIP here to receive it in your inbox. It’s free. Insights and wisdom, no hard sell. https://www.sequinsandsand.com.au/vip.html About Erica Webb:Erica is a counsellor, somatic exercise coach and self-kindness advocate. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself, she supports other HSPs to navigate what it looks like to prioritise their own mental fitness, claim the self-care that truly nurtures their body and mind, and work through the unique challenges their sensitivity poses. Erica works with clients 1-1, as well as in her online program, SOMA:HOME and online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. Connect with Erica:Website: https://www.ericawebb.com.auEmail: erica@ericawebb.com.auInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ericawebb_selfkindLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ericawebbselfkind/