Flaws of Attraction

5. Sacred Sexuality & Spiral Dynamics

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 15 Jul 2025 16:45:00 GMT

It’s so weird to think that deconstruction is a buzz word now. It’s been so hard. Like, possibly loose your family type of hard. Loose every friendship you have type of hard. Loose every wisdom and lesson you were taught type of hard. In this episode, Rachel Alba helped me latch on to the things that I could keep, in a new found safe place. I had a great conversation with my friend Alysa about what it means to be free. In church, we were always encouraged to embrace our freedom in Christ, however both of us feel full freedom on the outside rather than in the inside of that institution. It blows my mind that unraveling is such a journey though. I’m grateful there are other people doing this type of work publicly now, I’m so happy to have a safe space to ask questions, and to share my journey with you all. I’m re-sharing an episode on two pivotal topics that helped me through my deconstruction. Exploring your own sexuality, and spiral dynamics.Spiral dynamics is one of the most pivotal and life-altering methodologies out there. On my journey of deconstruction, it gave me the language to the spiral of my growth in ways no one else was able to share. Inevitably, starting my podcast was the beginning of me walking away from Christianity and deconstructing on my terms.

Spiral Dynamics is a method of understanding the world on a macro and micro scale, as we move into different levels of consciousness. Each stage reflects how individuals or societies respond to their life conditions, growing in complexity and inclusivity over time. expanding on ideas like Maslow’s hierarchy of needs by showing how human motivation and thinking evolve in waves.

Cole’s notes to this theory: Our society has evolved over centuries and is continually moving up the ranks, and at the same time, on an individual level, you can experience the same trajectory of growth in your own life. The catch is, at each level you either have to learn each lesson the level sends you, or the universe will rock-bottom you into the next dimension. :oWhen I was unpacking my faith, leaning into the questions, and getting serious about changing my worldview, it felt like I was moving backwards.Christianity says SO much. You should avoid thinking this way, speaking this way, watching this form of media. Questioning everything feels uncomfortable. It feels like you’re slipping backwards in time….

But what if it wasn’t a slipping backwards of time, but instead, you find yourself moving up a spiral. I cannot begin to explain how incredible this theory is, better then these guys. Even thought this is an older post, I would highly recommend spending the time to listen to it.

In this weeks episode, I talk to certified Clinical Sexologist and Theologian Rachel Alba about sacred sexuality, tantra, and spiral dynamics. Brought up Catholic, her studies have centred around the sexual theologies of religious and spiritual traditions such as Tantra, Kabbalah, Taoism and Christianity. A coach and podcast host of the 'Sex-Positive Christian Feminists,' Rachel's mission facilitate and guide conversations that are sex-positive, feminist & LGBTQ+ affirming to Christians and those moving from one spirituality to the next.

I highly recommend the listen as well as one on one coaching with her!! Thank you everyone for your support 😘🤍⏰ Episode Timestamps0:00 - 10:00 — Introduction and overview of faith transitions10:00 - 20:00 — Discussion of Fowler’s faith development stages20:00 - 30:00 — The interplay of sexuality and spirituality30:00 - 40:00 — Importance of integrating theology, sexology, mindfulness, and spirituality in healing40:00 - 50:00 — Personal reflections on faith1:10:00 - 1:15:00 — Final thoughts, encouragement to embrace authenticity in spirituality and sexualityLet's connect @j.t.t.vGuest: Rachel Alba☕ Buy Me a Coffee (Donate/Become a Monthly Supporter)🌐 Join the community group on Geneva💻 Work with me (Graphic design, videography, photography, Squarespace)👯‍♀️ The Flaws of Attraction Community Group

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3. Dismantling Purity Culture with Linda Kay Klein

Jillian Alexa — Sat, 05 Jul 2025 15:00:00 GMT

In this weeks episode of the podcast, I talk with New York Times best-selling author Linda Kay Klien of Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free, about her experience gathering case studies of purity culture survivors from across America, over 16 years. Her personal experience being woken up to the realization that she was dissociated from her body, and her program @breakfreetogether - a place or to process for purity culture survivors

Let's connect

Linda Kay Klien - www.lindakayklien.com
Jillian

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2. Healing Heartbreak & Letting Go with Rachel Lung

Jillian Alexa — Thu, 03 Jul 2025 04:23:00 GMT

In this episode I have a candid conversation with one of my best friends on heartbreak, letting go, and arriving at self-worth through energetic rock bottoms. We share candid stories of how we’ve seen attachment theory operating in our relationships and how we have processed heartbreak.

Let's connect @j.t.t.v
Guest: @raylunger

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36. Discovering your Spirituality with Holistic Pelvic Care Therapist Kirby Criddle

Jillian Alexa — Sun, 19 May 2024 21:41:31 GMT

In this episode, I interview Kirby Criddle, a holistic practitioner who specializes in pelvic floor therapy and trauma integration. Kirby shares her cultural background and her experience growing up in the church. She also talks about her spirituality and how she has come back to Christianity in a new reframed way. We also discuss the importance of women's pelvic health and the work Kirby does to help women flourish in their romantic relationships. Kirby shares about her Naked Cake event and the power of vulnerability in building connections. Tune in to hear more about Kirby's work and her unique perspective on holistic wellness.

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38. Get that Money Honey with Melanie Trottier

Jillian Alexa — Sun, 19 May 2024 21:41:19 GMT

Get that Money Honeeeyy

In this podcast episode, I sit down with my close friend Mel and we discuss our personal experiences with money and journeys towards financial literacy. We share about both privilege and money mindset, the psychological aspect of money and how to become empowered through tracking your finances. We share tips and resources, such as personal finance books and Mel's amazing notion expense tracker, that have helped our own financial journeys. We empower you to take control of your own finances and to strive towards a life of financial freedom and security!

Get Mel's Expense Tracker

Follow us
Melanie
Myself

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37. Cosplaying your life, Hillsong College & Unraveling Purity Culture with Alysa Chirkoff

Jillian Alexa — Sun, 19 May 2024 21:40:59 GMT

In this episode, Alysa shares her story of attending Hillsong College and navigating through the purity culture that was prevalent in the Christian community. She talks about the pressure to conform to certain ideals and the shame that came with not meeting those expectations. Alyssa also discusses the impact that her experience at Hillsong had on her mental health and how she ultimately found healing through therapy and self-reflection. Join us for a candid conversation about the harmful effects of purity culture and the importance of prioritizing mental health.

Here are some key takeaways from the conversation:

Purity culture and it's harmful effects
Therapy and self-care
Being honest with yourself and listening to your body can help you stay true to your authentic self
It's important to prioritize mental health and seek help when needed.

Follow myself at: Jillian Alexa
Alysa Chirkoff

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35. Manifesting with Salwa Yasmin Kyobe of Fundamental Hunger & To Be Magnetic

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 01 Feb 2023 23:00:00 GMT

In this episode, I talk about everything manifestation with Salwa Kyobe, a coach from Lacy Philip's To Be Magnetic. We discuss the pillars of how to manifest, attachment systems and Salwa's own manifestations (a one-bedroom apartment in New York City, a partner, an expansive career, finding her voice, and more. )

In this episode I answer your questions:
– Manifesation
– What needs to be in motion to manifest
– Avoidant attachment Styles
– Dating and partnership
– Creating the life you desire
– Finding your voice
– Doing the work

Follow myself at: Jillian Alexa
Work with Salwa: Salwa Kyobe
Follow Salwa on Social: Salwa Yasmin Kyobe
To Be Magnetic

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33. The Enneagram & Breakup Recovery with Gina Gomez

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 14 Dec 2022 18:00:00 GMT

Finally one of my all-time topics of obsession, and it's truly shocking we haven't talked about this before. In this episode, I invite on Gina Gomez, Author of The Enneagram & You - to share about working with the enneagram and combining this modality for those healing through heartbreak. We discuss how to type yourself, the impact the enneagram has had on us as well as how to find ideal romantic pairings via the enneagram.

You can learn more about Gina Gomez and her breakup recovery course at the link below:

Gina Gomez's Offerings:
https://linktr.ee/ginagomez.co

Gina's enneagram test:
https://uquiz.com/quiz/97VyeA/enneagram-you-quiz

Enneagram test with instincts:
https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/test2

Where to find us:
Follow Gina on instagram at: Gina Gomez
Follow myself at: Jillian Alexa

_________________________________

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32. Art School, Personal Style & working with your Best Friend with Sara Croft

Jillian Alexa — Sat, 19 Nov 2022 03:00:00 GMT

In this episode, I bring on my BFF Sara to share about our career journeys and experiences with Art School. We chat candidly on how to find your own personal style, our different mindsets in dating and journeys with spirituality.

Buy Me a Coffee (Donate/Become a Monthly Supporter)

You can follow us at:
@j.t.t.v
@itssaracroft

Work with me (Graphic design, videography, photography, Squarespace)
www.jtranquilla.com

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31. Spooky Stories + Magical Happenings with Elle the Ellechemist

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 01 Nov 2022 01:00:00 GMT

There aren't many days I meet someone who has won 42 Giveaways in one year. But I did, I met Elle, and she is an inspiration when it comes to living a life filled with magical happenings. In this episode, I share some personal spooky ghost stories, we talk about what the practice of Alchemy and its origins, and how Elle is both a practising Alchemist and Manifestor. We talk studying herbalism and Elle’s go-to herbal remedies.

You can follow us at:
@j.t.t.v
@Elle

_________________________________

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29. How to Get Through a Breakup with Kayley Reed

Jillian Alexa — Sun, 25 Sep 2022 15:00:00 GMT

I'm so honoured to invite Kayley Reed, influencer agent, content creator and tech startup leader, to share her experience getting through heartbreak. In this episode, we talk about what each of us does to get through a breakup, find ourselves again and carry on. We talk about the nuances of healing a wounded heart while being an entrepreneur, becoming your dream partner and what we feel about the no-contact rule. I also share a protocol of what to do the day after a breakup to give myself the best chances of healing.

Episode resources
The Heartbreak Playlist
Mark Groves
Nurberxo

Instagram:
Kayley Reed
Jillian Alexa

Show Notes:

Entrepreneurs and dating
Ground-shattering breakups
Pulling yourself out of heartbreak through writing
Not working through your heartbreak
Dealing with your heartbreak trapped in your body
Losing our passions because it’s not work
Codependency in love - Loving being in Love - giving yourself to someone else
Sacrifices made to make it work
Partnership as a mirror to further growth
Becoming the dream partner
Intuition always ringing true
Hindsight is 20/20 - I can trust my intuition
No Contact
Navigating the Social Media landscape while dating and after a breakup

______________________________

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28. The Psychology of Money with Chantel Chapman from the Trauma of Money

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 07 Sep 2022 02:00:00 GMT

In this episode I bring on founder of the Trauma of Money, Chantel Chapman, to speak on the art of financial literacy and the psychology of money. Our relationships to money are defined by our beliefs and in turn shapes how we navigate the world. We dive into the process of developing a eudaimonia approach to life, how to cultivate healthy practices with your money as well as how to heal both through breath and cold plunges.

Guest:
Chantel Chapman
The Trauma of Money

Melanie Trottier's Expense Tracker
Expense Tracker

Where to find me
Host: Jillian Alexa - @j.t.t.v

Show Notes:

Chantel's personal journey towards studying and teaching financial literacy
Being a workaholic, undercharging and overspending
Noticing addictive patterns
5-year research journey on healing from trauma
Labelling behaviours as ‘disordered behaviours’
Hitting rock bottom and up-levelling
The truth about undercharging: why pricing properly is so important
The magic of breathing
Cold water therapy
Seeing your resilience and strength
Seeking pleasure over pain
Dopamine addiction

________________________________

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26. Connecting with Your Ancestors with Lauren DeLeary

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 27 Jul 2022 04:00:00 GMT

In this episode, Lauren DeLeary of Deconstruct Pod & BINESHI music and I discuss Lauren’s experience walking away from a thriving career in the Christian Music industry to pursue her authenticity, reconnect with her ancestors and deconstruct religious doctrine. We talk about reclaiming our voices, how to activate your creativity and how Lauren is reconnecting with her Indigenous heritage and ancestors.

Where to find us:
Host: Jillian Alexa - @j.t.t.v
Guest: Lauren DeLeary -

Mentioned in the show:
Deconstruct Pod
BINESHI Music

SHOW NOTES:

Growing up aboriginal and Christian
The tension between those two things
When the damage started to become evident
Purity ceremonies
Being a worship leader
Christian music world
Charismatic vs conservative churches
I kissed dating goodbye - Joshua Harris
Being offered money to save your first kiss
Purity culture
When severed spirituality equates to severed creativity
Reactivating creativity
Falling for the lie of being an empty vessel
Being numb to life
Waking up on tour to intuition and emotions
Leaving an engagement
Rabbit trail of questions: what is sex? Creating deconstruction pod
Why does your pastor care about your sexuality?
Being an empty vessel
The universe wants to work with you
Astrology/deconstruction as an idol
How to connect to your ancestors
Loving your ancestors is loving you
Decolonizing and indigenizing her life
Multiple things can be true at once
Losing your identity as an artist
Losing relationships due to deconstruction

_________________________________

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25. Talking to a Sex Coach: Navigating Relationship and Family Dynamics after Deconstruction with Meg Cowan

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 04:00:00 GMT

In this episode I chat with Sex Coach & Relationship Coach Meg Cowan on healing from purity culture, growing within partnerships as well as evolving both community and family dynamics. More often than now, transitioning paradigms can result in relational tension. We talk about how to navigate both family units and romantic relationship structures during religious deconstruction. Megan shares her personal story of her journey to becoming a sex coach as well as resources for healing, and how it’s manifested in marriage.

Show Notes:

One year since the podcast
Would you rather?
Growing up on a YWAM base
Meg’s relationship with faith, spirituality and religion while growing up
Meg’s journey to religious deconstruction
Grief while stepping away from a religious community
Discovering agency, autonomy and finding yourself
Navigating rock bottoms in marriage
Unravelling teachings around purity culture as a couple and as an individual
Working through purity culture as it manifests within a marriage
Women’s sex life’s improved by 25% just by talking about sex
Reclaiming your sexual autonomy
The length of time it takes to adjust to a new paradigm
Working through shame
Somatic and embodiment therapy
Leaving a faith community and navigating a broken community
Relational dysfunction and relational severing
Tips for navigating telling your family/partner about your deconstruction
Re-meeting our partners
When to have conflicting conversations
The Shame-free sex course

Discussed in this episode:

Flaws of Attraction Host (@j.t.t.v)

For more from me, follow us on Instagram and TikTok @j.t.t.v

Meg Cowan - website
Instagram (@megcowan)

🔥 Bust religious myths and shame

❤️‍🩹Heal from purity culture

💥Find your confidence and freedom

_________________________________

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24. Toxic Masculinity with Alex Verville

Jillian Alexa — Mon, 27 Jun 2022 10:00:00 GMT

In this episode Alex Verville (host of the BORNSAVED) and I share the ways surpressed masculinity show up in evangelical and Christian culture. We talk about its effects in our personal lives as well as how to work-through trauma, discovering the masucline and the feminine within ourselves, and how Human Design can aid this this discovery.

I also share my life update moving careers and going through the ending of a relationship.

You can find us at:

Alex Verville: @iamalexverville
BORNSAVED: Spotify
Jillian: @j.t.t.v

_________________________________

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23. The End of your Youth, the Beginning of your Power with Astrologer Sky Spallone

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 18 May 2022 16:00:00 GMT

In this episode, I talk with Astrologer and friend, Sky Spallone about moving through your Progressed Lunar Return into your Saturn return. We talk about the current Astrological transits and what exactly is happening this Eclipse season. Sky shares how she uses Astrology in her everyday life, from Manifestation to Surrender.

Where to find us:
instagram.com/j.t.t..v
instagram.com/skyspallone
northnodewell.com

_________________________________

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22. Unpacking Trauma with Simone Saunders of the Cognitive Corner

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 04 May 2022 05:00:00 GMT

In this episode, I talk with Simone Saunders of the Cognitive Corner. We unpack the different types of trauma and how they are determined by the nervous system. She shares tools for
regulation as well as the importance of somatic healing work. We talk about how shame pops up during the work, and how to work with your body.

Where to find us:
instagram.com/j.t.t..v
instagram.com/thecognitivecorner
www.thecognitivecorner.ca

How to enter the giveaway!!!

⁕GIVEAWAY⁕

Enter to Win: @j.t.t.v

⁕ A 1-Year Subscription to @letsdivethru

⁕ A $100 gift card to @classpass

⁕ Night and Day Remedy Bar Essential Oils by @sajewellness

⁕ Relax-o-ring copper acupuncture ring by @sagewellness

DiveThru is a Mental Health app that helps you take charge of your mental health via our simple daily routine and interactive tools so you can lead a mentally healthier and more fulfilling life. I’ve been using the app for the past month and have found it to be extremely helpful when it comes to regulating and processing the curveballs life throws at me. I’m so amped to be doing the giveaway with them.

To enter, you must:

1. Follow @j.t.t.v on Instagram and tag a friend who might benefit from the giveaway

2. Leave a podcast review on Apple Podcasts for “Flaws of Attraction." [Link in bio]

3. Share this post to your story for a bonus entry.

Open to North American residents. Giveaway closes at 11:59pm on Monday, May 16th. Winner will be chosen at random and contacted directly by myself.

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Good luck!

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20. Decolonized Spirituality, Somatic Practices & the Power of Integration with Tara Teng

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 06 Apr 2022 18:24:26 GMT

Embodiment and Spirituality practitioner, Tara Teng, shares an often missed piece of healing from religious trauma and purity culture: the importance of integration. Former Miss Canada, Teng stands at the intersection of sexuality and spirituality and coaches survivors of purity culture back into their bodies. In this episode, we talk about finding a decolonized spirituality, and the importance of somatics and integration practices that actively heal trauma created from purity culture.

_________________________________

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17. Human Design with Misha Labrecque

Jillian Alexa — Mon, 21 Feb 2022 13:00:23 GMT

In this episode, my friend Misha Labrecque comes on to share with us about the typology system Human Design. She covers the basics layers of the system and how they can intersect with deconstruction, parenting and your decision-making process. We talk about how this system helps in deconditioning from past beliefs, and how to practically experiment with HD in everyday life.

Follow us
Misha
Myself

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16. Deconstruction, Divorce & Parenting with Julia of Speakeasy Story

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 08 Feb 2022 07:02:51 GMT

In this episode, my friend Julia and I dive further into the nuances of what it is like being a mother while deconstructing from purity culture and organized religion. Julia from Speakeasy Story shares her journey through marriage and divorce, her experience navigating deconstructing while parenting, finding personal independence, as well as discovering embodiment. We discuss the multi-layered facets of transitioning paradigms while being a part of a family unit. Julia is a writer, mother, and creative living in Golden, BC. Her story expressed the complexities of returning to her personal voice.

Where to find us:
Instagram - Julia
Substack
Jill

______________________________

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15. Astrology, Tarot & Manifesting Partnership with Tasy Nicole of the Moon Mystics Club

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 26 Jan 2022 05:34:42 GMT

With over 10+ years of studying the stars, Tasy Nicole shares what it's like to integrate and work with the art of astrology to step into your true authenticity. In this episode, we talk about working with astrology to overcome grief, manifesting partnership and tapping into your intuition.

You can find us at:
Jillian
Tasy
The Moon Mystics Club

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13. Discovering PCOS, Hormonal Acne Journey & Healing the Body with Jenelle Katrine of FGS Wellness

Jillian Alexa — Wed, 29 Dec 2021 00:13:47 GMT

Founder of FGS Wellness, Jenelle Katrine share’s her story of discovering her hormonal imbalance, PCOS, while on a mission to cure her acne. In this episode, we take a deep dive into the topics of hormonal imbalances, gut health, seed cycling and emotional healing. Devoted to supporting and guiding others in all facets of Holistic Wellness, Jenelle shows us that healing skin and hormones can be the first step of a much larger journey.

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12. Mental Health & Therapy with Your Internet Big Sis, Melanie Trottier

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 06:56:06 GMT

TW: Depression & Restrictive eating. Canadian Suicide Hotline: 833-456-4566Pyschology Search Engine: https://tinyurl.com/4rpw6wmz In this episode, Melanie and I dive into therapy, physical manifestations of pain, and integrating healing modalities. We talk about battling depression, moving through chronic pain and how the body keeps the score. Advocate for educating those on mental health and mental wellbeing, Melanie Trottier shares her journey working with a therapist for over a decade. Where to find us:Follow Mel here:www.instagram.com/melanielaureneyoutube: youtu.be/A94Vc38gVVoFollow me:www.instagram.com/j.t.t.v

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11. Mysticism & Charismania: Behind the Scenes of Heaven Bent with Tara Jean Stevens

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 07:48:03 GMT

Looking behind the curtain of the Charismatic movement stands Tara Jean Stevens: host of the Heaven Bent podcast. We take a look at the production of Heaven Bent and strange charismatic expressions such as speaking in tongues, rolling on the floor, prophecy and even claims of gold teeth. We dive into Tara Jean Steven's exposé and investigation of claims of Divine Intervention.Find me:Instagram: @j.t.t.vFind Tara:Instagram: @heavenbentpod@instagram @tarajeanonlineHeaven Bent:https://open.spotify.com/show/7tRJcheTT2UxoGz7ujH8Vo?si=77cf01c581424e3f

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10. Healing through Creativity with Jonathan Zoetman

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 16 Nov 2021 07:28:49 GMT

Photographer and writer, Jonathon Zoetman’s work focuses on emphasizing and capturing feeling, emotion, and story while exploring the relationships between individuals and the world around them. In the episode, we discuss working with art as a means of expression, the importance of stillness and aligning with what is meant for you. We share the importance of slowing down and finding true inspiration. Follow us:@jonathanzoetman https://www.jonathanzoeteman.com/Myself:@j.t.t.vInner voice sessions:Jenelle@fgswellness

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8. Christ Consciousness & Evolving Spirituality with Alex Verville of the BORNSAVED podcast

Jillian Alexa — Tue, 19 Oct 2021 06:46:43 GMT

In this episode, I speak with Alex Verville, co-founder of Moondust our Mother and host of the BORNSAVED podcast. A space holder for those seeking to heal the wounded Jesus by returning to the Kingdom within, Alex shares what it means to discover your own God-Identity. We talk about the concept of Christ Consciousness, Human design, and the difficulties of transitioning paradigms within family structures. Alex’s words are empathetic, comforting and deeply vulnerable. Check out his podcast:https://open.spotify.com/show/3A5PUwpOqcMVywnqZ2zQOJ?si=288w7d6_RdC8LX20yKotCQFollow us:@iamalexverville@j.t.t.v

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6. Manifesting your Dreams with Charmine Baquiran

Jillian Alexa — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 06:22:16 GMT

Professional dancer Charmaine Baquiran’s career has taken her from coast to coast as she has manifested her dream life. We chat about true confidence, leading with your intuition and the art of manifestation. Charmaine shares about the synchronicities that aligned her to work with world-renown industry artists such as Beyoncé, Tinashe, Arianna, Zayn, and more. We can’t wait for you guys to listen!

Lets connect!

Follow me and Flaws of Attraction
@j.t.t.v
Follow Charmaine @charmaine.loreine
IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm6562118/

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